“Why didn’t you try harder? You just left.” Ang sakit kase isipin. Okay naman tayo diba? Alam mo naman na mahal na mahal kita. Pero bakit bumitaw ka kagad ng hindi mo man lang pinaramdam sakin na kaya mong panindigan yung meron tayo. Ang bilis mo kong sinukuan. Iniwan mo ko sa panahong kelangan kita. Hindi ka man lang nag abalang isipin kung anong mararamdaman ko. Kung anong mangyayari sakin. Pakiramdam ko, talo ako. No. Totoong talo ako. Nawala sakin yung bagay na pinaglalaban ko. Nawala sakin yung taong ipinagmamalaki ko. Iniwan nya ko. Akala mo ba magiging okay lahat na iniwan mo ko? No. Iniwan mo ko mag-isa. Salamat sa effort mo. Alam ko para lang yun hindi ko masabi na hindi ka man lang nagtry. Pero hindi mo sinubukan lahat ng kaya mo. I thought iba ka. Pinaramdam mo sakin na hindi mo ko iiwan eh. Pinaramdam mo sakin na hindi ka susuko. Hindi mo naman pala kayang panindigan. The end na. That’s the sad part of our story.

atelophobia

(noun) Atelophobia is defined as the fear of imperfection. Accompanied with the fear of imperfection also comes thoughts of comparison with others’ goals, accomplishments and expectations. Ultimately, it is the fear of “not being good enough.” Although sentiments of atelophobia are extremely natural, one should seek help, if these feelings plague their mind.

etymology: Greek, ατελής atelès, meaning “imperfect” or “incomplete” and φόβος, phóbos, “fear”.

(via wordsnquotes)

Shout out to my ex!

Masyado akong naaliw tuwing pinapatugtog ko tong kanta ng Little mix na shout out to my ex! Ewan! Isang taon lang naman ang itinagal natin! Isang taon na hindi ko alam kung ilang buwan ako dun! Oo, Niloloko mo ko habang ako , nagpapakaloyal sayo! Magkaiba man kami ni Perrie pero parehong sakit ang naranasan namin! Iniwanan ni Zayn si Perrie, At ako , Iniwan kita! Oo! Dahil hindi ko na kaya ang sakit na idinudulot mo sa sistema ko! Walang gabi na hindi ako umiiyak , dahl sa panloloko mo! Naging okay tayo, pero nakikipaglaro nalang ako! Umiyak ka sa harap ko , nag laslas ka pa nga! Para lang maipakita mo na sincere ka talaga sakin. pero WALA NG EPEKTO YON! Hanggang sa nakamove on ka sakin! May bago ka na! Ako din may bago na, Pero minumulto mo padin ako , Naamoy ko biglaan ang pabango mo! Naiisip ko na nagsasalita ka sa tabi ko! Nagmumukha nakong baliw! Naiisip ko, Bakit ? Wala ka naman na sa puso ko! Oo, wala ka na! Pero nasasaktan ako na nakikita kitang masaya sa piling nya! Bakit? bakit?

About 2 months ago, maybe a little more I stopped being best friends with my best friend. Friends fight and we had fought before but we always seemed to find each other again. This time was different this time we didn’t find each other. You never think your best friend would be the person who tears your heart up, breaks it into a million pieces, and stomps on it till there is nothing left but mush. You never picture yourself to be the person to do it back. But we did. We hurt each other over and over and over to make one of us feel better as if we were “winning”. But all we were doing was destroying all possibilities of fixing the tear in our friendship. All we did was make a bigger hole. You spend your whole life with someone that you start to take them and your connection for granted. Until you have nights where you knew they would be there for you, where they would put you back onto the right path. But they aren’t there anymore. It may not hit you right away. The whole missing them thing. It could take days, weeks, months maybe even years. But you’ll get to that point. You can say many things to yourself to make you think different. “You are strong, you don’t need her, you don’t miss her, you never want her back in your life, things are easier without her.” But it’s all fake. You are strong but you are stronger with her. You may not need her now but you will, time will tell. You may not want her back in your life right now, but try to picture someone else as your maid of honour or someone else watching your kids when you grow up. You don’t miss her? Wait till the memories come up on Facebook from 1,2,3,4 years ago, look how happy you 2 were. Thing might be easier right now but who’s gonna be there for you when things get tough? One late night when nothing seems to be going right and for some god-forsaken reason you are looking through your photos you’ll see her. You’ll see the picture of you and her and you’ll crack a smile . You don’t know why but you will. A bunch of images and laughs will all scatter your brain. You will remember the night you showed up at her house at 4 am to make sure she was ok, or the night she stayed on the phone with you for hours and listened to you cry over the stupid boy. You’ll remember all the stupid memories like the first time you 2 got drunk and drunk dialled all the boys who “f**ked you over in 2015” or the time you put your hand prints in each other’s closets to never forget . And after you crack you smile maybe laugh a little you’ll get a pain. A pain so deep in your stomach it’s unreal. You’ll feel your face tighten up as you get ready for the tears. You’ll feel you whole body freeze in pressure as your brain thinks. Thinks about the decisions you 2 have made. Was it really worth the IG post? Was it really Worth it to post a screenshot of her post and hashtag it “#yourplayin’”? Or completely make the other person seem like a idiot on social media? Did you feel fabulous after it? Huh? Did it make you feel awesome to embarrass a girl you loved for sooo many years to get a couple “rt” at the bottom of a stupid picture that no one will remember 2 weeks from then but you and her? You’re going to regret it. Regret the moment you didn’t decide to be the bigger person and apologize. You’re gonna regret the first time you let the words “ihateher” spit out of your mouth. You’re gonna regret everyone someone said her name and your response was “oh her”. Because it all seems so stupid. Why would you ever do something so cruel to someone who meant so much to you? So to the friend that I hurt but equally hurt me back, I’m sorry. I know there is a point of no forgiveness. I know we reached that point but I’m still sorry. Life goes and people stay and people leave and growing up I sure as hell never thought I’d lose you. And maybe it’s better this way but who knows? I’m sorry I broke your heart more than a guy probably ever has, I’m sorry I made you feel lonely, I’m sorry I put other people’s views on “our breakup story” before the thought of how you would feel. Dear ex bff, I’m sorry.

jayde landers (via wordsnquotes)

I’m sorry!

Moving on!

“Letting go isn’t a one-time thing. It’s a daily decision and the full effects take time. You’re going to be okay. “ Paulit ulit kong binabasa yan! Paulit ulit pero parang hindi tinatanggap ng utak ko ang ibig sabihin nyan! Bakit hindi ko parin magwang pakawalan ka sa mga alala nating ako nalang ang nakakaalala! Pero pinipilit ko! Pinipilit kong iwan ka muli , Iwan ang mga bagay na nakakapagpaalala sayo! Dahil pagod nakong maging alipin ng alaala mo!