Bakugo, sounding bored af: Welcome to Cappy’s Diner, how can we help you?

Robber, pulls a gun on him: Give me the money!

Bakugo: Pfft, what is that, a 32?

Robber: I-I said give me the money!

Bakugo: Or what, you’re gonna shoot me?

Robber: Yes if you don’t give me the money, you fu*king brat!

Bakugo: You know what, asshat?! Go ahead and shoot! Life honestly can’t get any worse than this, so pull the damn trigger! Pull it!

Robber, pulls the trigger and misses Bakugo:

Bakugo: SON OF A BITCH! *throws a metal pan into the robber’s head*

Robber, falls to the floor: AH!

Bakugo, jumps the counter and starts beating the guy up with a metal frier basket: PIECE OF SHIT! ASSHAT WITH DIRTY-ASS CLOTHES! YOUR MOM NEVER LOVED YOU, YOU SACK OF WASTE!

reblog to pet the sad cat 　　　　　　 ＿＿ 　　　　　／＞　　フ 　　　　　|  　_　 _ l 　 　　　／` ミ＿xノ 　　 　 /　　　 　 | 　　　 /　 ヽ　　 ﾉ 　 　 │　　|　|　| 　／￣|　　 |　|　| 　| (￣ヽ＿_ヽ_)__) 　＼二つ

me @ my partners

Current mood: missing you.

Screm

stop following me you godless heathens, i am but a little shrimp trying to live in this void of existence with songs stuck on loop in my brain

{Quotes :Herakles - Euripides (Tr. Anne Carson), images are mine }

I have been a sheep caretaker for like two days and already I'm like. Wow. I get it.

I get why these were some of the earliest mammals to ever be domesticated. They look up to humans with this sort of dumb but all at once innocent and pure and trusting expression. They're happy to see you. They follow you around. They like to be rubbed under their chins. Maybe its just some latent Scottish highland shepherd DNA I still have in me but I look at my sheep charges and suddenly I see why the love of God for humanity is so often described as a shepherd and his sheep. I'd fight a wolf for these guys. I'd go way the Hell out of my way for them. I'd carry their young for miles on my own back.

please watch this two second clip from santa clarita diet

Did you know that there's another Chocolate Guy called Kris Zhaokai?

Do you ever like physically feel yourself pass your mental breaking point and then all you can think is “oh these next few days are going to be interesting”

wanna hear a wild story? my brother’s history professor is closing in on 80 and basically lives at the university. one night my brother visited him for a meeting, and it came up that my brother was gonna be performing as a court jester at the castle the following day. and his professor busts out: “ah, that reminds me of my youth!”

he then proceeded to tell the tale of when he and his friends went backpacking to greece back in their early 20s. then one day they found themselves completely penniless. so they decided that the only reasonable thing to do was to set up acrobatic shows in skimpy outfits on the beach at day, and then drink up the money at night.

after a week or so they gained some traction, and a gang of young greek men walked up to them like “hey y’all are cool as hell, can we join y’all for drinks tonight?” and my brother’s professor was like “of course! y’all have to wear these revealing outfits and do somersaults with us tho” and the greek gang said “sounds dope. y’all are invited to live with us for however long y’all want.”

anyhow, they proceeded to live like this for the better part of 3 months, doing shows, drinking, and sleeping at the greek gang’s apartment. but after a while they decided enough was enough, and said thank you for everything, but we’re going back to sweden now. and the greeks said “sure! love y’all have a safe trip xx”

half a year later my brother’s professor gets contacted by the greek police. they ask him about the months they spent in greece, and then informs him that their greek friends have been convicted of serial homicide and robbery. that the group of young greek men had joined up with several tourist groups for several years “for drinks”, and then killed and robbed them all, terrorising the beach city for several years. with one exception, of course, because “this one group of swedish acrobats in slutty strongman suits were just ‘so damn nice’”.

and that’s the story of how one swedish history university professor survived sharing a flat with a group of serial killers for several months by performing acrobatics in slutty outfits on the beach. moral of the story? be kind of heart, thicc of ass.

what this fandom needs

more f/f

"biblical angels" you do realise there are angels in the old testament that are literally just regular looking guys, right? you do know that the hallucinogenic incoherent descriptions are in like. two books. and the rest of the time angels are just guys. you know that, right?

and I'm not saying don't have fun with weird angels. I'm saying, either the eldritch forms are for special occasions, or the society of the angels is Many-Eyed-Many-Winged-Interlocking-Circles, Four-Faces-Six-Wings, and Mike.

girls go to college to get more knowledge. men go to svalbard to die in the polar night.

Reblog if you see your fandom

Waluigi

Waluigi

Waluigi

Waluigi

Waluigi

Waluigi

Waluigi

Waluigi

Waluigi

~I sigh softly as I pick up a plastic teeball bat~ "time to knock 'em out"

People have built up a tolerance over the years to insomnia medication, and now, in 2119, the world is brightly lit, no one is sleeping, and people are slowly dying from exhaustion. It’s your job, as Mr. Sandman, to save the world. How will you do it?

"This is my letter goodbye, and due to personal reasons I will be dissappearing under mysterious circumstances, I'm not dying, but traveling to the next realm. I wish you all the best, but I have a horse to catch out of here. Fare thee well and I hope we meet again in the next life.

And don't play with time.

Always yours.

The Traveler

“Due to personal reasons, I will be disappearing under mysterious circumstances.”