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I just realized — how come San and Deok Im's love languages were so opposite of what they need from each other?
San's love language: Words of affirmation
Something that he's been craving to hear from Deok Im.
Remember when Deok Im said she'd protect him, he engraved those words deeply into his heart, to the point of confessing, "How can I possibly not love such a woman?"
Remember how brightly he smiled to the point of disbelief when Deok Im answered "I missed you too" during his first visit to her after she became his concubine.
San always tells Deok Im how much she means to him.
How much he loves and adores her, that he wants to make a family with her.
How he becomes powerless and broken whenever he sees her cry.
But Deok Im either cuts him,
Stays silent,
Or gives him a blatant rejection.
He knows she has deep feelings for him too. There's no way that she doesn't love him back. But since he's not receiving a clear-cut answer, he just satisfies himself with the fact that she's his anyway, regardless of what she feels.
But then until her last breath, Deok Im sealed her heart. She just imparted a subtle response on her true feelings about him. He wasn't able to obtain the ultimate thing he wanted from her – a direct love confirmation – and he beat himself up for that to his deathbed.
Deok Im's love language: Acts of service
Something that Deok Im cannot demand from him as he is not in the position to do so.
Deok Im saved him a lot of times, putting her own life on the line.
She frantically looks for solutions when he's in trouble.
However, sadly, San cannot do the same for her.
Remember that time when Deok Im was wrongfully accused of stealing Lady Yeong's book, the least he could do for her was to send her to exile.
When she was defamed for supposedly having a relationship with a royal guard, he chose not succumb to his personal feelings and go against the rules to save her, even if it means her death.
Poor Deok Im excitedly waited for him to arrive to celebrate the news of her pregnancy, hinting that she's ready to confess her hidden feelings for him (remember the yellow pouch she made with San's sisters which they intend to give to their husbands? It was at this point when I thought Deok Im considered him his husband, the father of her child, her family. This very pouch symbolizes her love🥺) But he never came; instead, he went to comfort his queen. And so she snapped out of reality that he was never hers.
He scolded her instead of comforting her for the loss of their child. But Deok Im took the initiative to compose her shattered self and went to him to cheer him up.
He couldn't even save her best friend from the death row, despite having the power to do so.
She's always there whenever he needs her, but he always makes her wait.
She's already contented to be by his side and serve him as a court lady, even if the thought of him being with another woman kills her inside. There's this line in the novel, "As expected, the distance between us is just right. Being further away is somehow hurtful, yet to go closer there is fear. He is there, and I am here. It’s just enough to make the heart flutter a bit. Nothing too sad, nothing too much." But he cornered her by saying she won't see him ever if she rejects him again. I bet she thought, "How can I live without seeing him? Merely seeing him living well is already enough for me." So our girl made the toughest decision. She sacrificed her entire freedom just to be with him. If that is not love then I don't know anymore.
Disregarding the afterlife scene, their love story is just so poignant. How ironic. They love each other so much, but weren't able to meet each other's needs. I can't help but cry thinking about this.
Hah~ I just wanted to write this as I'm preparing to let go of my lingering attachments towards this drama. My heart really aches for these two. I read Junho's interview yesterday and looks like our boy is also not functioning well after the drama ended. Good to know, we shouldn't be the only ones to suffer you know. Kidding!
And so, here's The Red Sleeve in a nutshell:
And oh by the way, I'm officially sending off this drama through this 2 FMVs I've made. Care to watch? 😊
The Red Sleeve FMV - San x Deok Im - Troublemaker
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The Red Sleeve FMV - San x Deok Im - Shouldn't Be
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When I saw that kite, I knew that it was you. It could only be you. When I thought that I could die, your face came to mind. I prayed to the heavens for one more chance… to see… your face… Deok Im.
THE RED SLEEVE (2021) dir. Jung Ji In
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THE GOOD PLACE (2016-2020)
1.03 “Tahani Al-Jamil”
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it should be a law that if it’s raining and you wake up feeling comfy in bed you shouldn’t have to answer to any of your obligations
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Y sigo esclavo de sus besos
Y sigo preso de mis miedos
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I promise I’m a lot nicer than my ‘walking to class’ face would lead you to believe.
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When you’re in the middle of procrastinating and suddenly the Will to Work™ hits you
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for every 2 minutes of brain usage i need 20 minutes of distraction and possibly a nap
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Not to self diagnose but something is wrong
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I guess I realized it’s something I’m sensitive to because of… well, you know… the 23 years we lost. I guess it still comes up once in a while. Yeah. With me too. But you should know that now I can’t imagine life without you.
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