[condescending school counsellor voice] so i noticed that you changed your tumblr theme colours to black and red and i just wanted to check that everything's all right at home

last night my partner held a somber little passover seder to show me what it’s about and when they got to the part where they were supposed to open the door for elijah they paused, frowned, and said “oh. huh. there is a clown.” and I looked out. and sure enough. there was a clown.

people misunderstand what ‘gifted kid’ actually means but it’s ok it’s fine it’s cool it’s good

Do you like giving speeches?

Do you like giving speeches?

Would you take this silly hypothetical job? You get paid one million USD per year but you had to be in an empty room for 8 hours a day Monday to Friday with no entertainment other than the other people who also work there (you can't choose who they are), nothing to sit on other than the concrete floor, no art just plain walls, and you can't bring any books or furniture or anything. There is also a bathroom provided so that's not a worry.

honestly i dont need therapy i need a machine to go into my body and manually stretch all my muscles and crack all my joints and then i need the machine to go into my brain and deep clean it with soapy hot water

its crazy growing up and realizing how deranged everyone is and how many problems everyone has. in such mundane ways. your waiter at olive garden believes in q anon. the woman doing your x ray just moved in with a guy she met a week ago. your insurance agent is a hoarder. etc.

We ask your questions so you don’t have to! Submit your questions to have them posted anonymously as polls.

“i could fix him” “i could make him worse” well I could put her on estrogen

the fact that op turned off rbs is very very funny to me. anyway i want this post on my blog too.

I noticed you haven’t been online in 10 hours, is therapy finally working?

this websites hate mail game is ruthless

Parents really post stuff like this online and wonder why their kids don't trust them

I got too excited while playing chess and told my opponent that I was going to slit his throat and slaughter him like a hog. something to work on for next time

you sit down at the plastic table because your partner likes being outside at the bar even though it’s 90 degrees and 60% humidity at 10pm and you thought this corduroy dress was soooo cute but now youre all sweaty and so one of your balls has escaped your panties but youre wearing fishnets so your loose nut is now dying like a sea turtle in a six pack ring and youre the desperate diver trying to save it but blind and one handed and stone faced cause you can’t draw attention to the fact that youre doing a high stakes wildlife rescue on your stupid scrotum in public because it might turn into a six month news cycle and desantis might fly out to personally bulldoze the bar. and its a thursday