thatexygurl
a place for all things exy
“This is my reassured face," Neil said, pointing up at his blank expression || avid aftg content consumer || kevaaron obsessed || if you like me here, you'll fall in love with me on @navarice
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yunamoon
YUNA MOON
FREELANCE DESIGN DIRECTOR
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poor Murph. everyone else having a great time at the party and this man is haunted by visions of their impending TPK
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"My darling paramour, my infernal flame, my Figueroth. I sent these meteors to you from the dawn of time when a rogue asteroid almost hit my dad's jet ski. Sundering the space rock with but a gesture of my most potent art, the debris surrounded me and with it came the sorrow of your absence. I sent these rocky chunks across the galaxy, and they have traveled since the beginning of time to tell you that I love you. In each moment of our mutual ignorance, where we had yet to meet, this message was already spinning its way to you through time and space to illuminate the night sky and tell you that I love you.
Us -- our love, like time, has been inevitable and strange. I have walked in its shadow joyfully. It gives me peace to know that in my darkest moments, my love for you was already on its way, flying through the stars. We have been on our way to save us since before the lights of our world were first lit. Pretty cool, my darling paramour.
P.S. I know you have another year of school after this. But I hope one day soon, you and I might travel amongst these stars together.
XOXO Ayda Aguefort
P.S. You are not gonna believe how much my dad spent on this jet ski."
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PERIODTTT!!
Andrew and Neil’s relationship will always be impactful to me because it’s about independence existing with love rather than in defiance of it. “I’m not your answer and you sure as fuck aren’t mine,” isn’t a throwaway sentence; it’s not Andrew trying to deny the thing growing between him and Neil. It’s saying the pure and simple truth: love isn’t going to fix everything. Love isn’t going to heal Neil or Andrew; infatuation isn’t going to last an eternity; this interest isn’t going to be a life purpose.
Both Andrew and Neil see it. Instead of pretending they can be enough for each other, they both work to help the other stand alone. Andrew helps Neil stand his ground and stop running. Neil helps Andrew accept his brother and the importance of other people. They help each other find answers that aren’t just themselves. (Although I would argue Andrew had this intention while Neil more or less saw himself as insufficient -- 'nothing' -- and therefore not enough to depend upon; but that's a whole other thing for a whole other post)
I think Andrew has a much deeper understanding of trauma responses and recovery than he lets on (he had so many sessions with Bee). He sees the signs of Neil growing dependent on him. He knows Neil is prone to dependency after his mother; he knows he himself is prone to controlling people and situations. They are the perfect recipe for toxic reliance. Knowing this, he tries to push Neil away. When he figures out he can’t, he tries to change the trajectory their past and their trauma has them set on. Everyone emphasizes how much Andrew focuses on not becoming his past via his ‘yes or no’, but he also focuses heavily on letting his family stand alone. In more ways than one, Andrew actively aspires to be better.
There’s a quote from a book I read recently (Notes of a Crocodile by Qiu Miaojin): “Only healthy people are capable of being in love. Using love to treat an illness just makes the illness worse.” So many stories romanticize love bringing people back from the dark. Andrew and Neil don’t drag each other out of dug graves. Instead, they hand each other a shovel and start digging themselves.
It's been on my mind; how Nora Sakavic masterfully concocted an outline of characters with a disaster waiting at the end of every road and told us a story about how people can take control of their lives and redirect themselves to something healthy and beautiful. I'm excited for TSC :)
#hii mordax!#this is navarice from ao3 so you're not like who is this weird person in the tags lmao#aftg#all for the game
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at a certain point, it became painful to look into his eyes 🤧
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congratulations to kevin day for being the aftg character who most gets cussed out with traditionally gender-nonconforming insults. drama queen, scathing diva, insufferable bitch. first male victim of misogyny
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Andrew texting Neil:
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actually how am i supposed to carry on after reading "the only one who had any chance was andrew, who threw himself out of his goal like all of hell was on his heels." LIKE ALL OF HELL WAS ON HIS HEELS. im going crazy
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Jerejean this, Neil ordering a hit that.
There's one thing I need to know. Was if Nora's intention to reference the ancient Greek myth Paris with Jean being given that as a nickname from Thea? Or is it just about the city? I need to know I need to know.
Paris being thrown out as a little child by his parents due the prophecy that he is going to be the reason for a kingdom's collapse. Paris becoming a Prince of Troy.
Jean being sold off by his parents due to their debt to the Moriayamas. Jean being blamed for the fall Edgar Allan Ravens took. Becoming a Trojan.
Paris being tempted by three goddesses promising him great things.
Jean being fucked over by a pretty face mentioned three times.
Paris and Jean being the scape goats of their stories when acting from love and due to powers stronger than them.
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I don’t know if you all realize how often I think about @02511213942 ‘s art and specifically the “Aaron and Neil were friends first” lol. Neil brought snacks for the study session
(I do know there’s a fic about the topic out there as well but I.. don’t read fic much so 025’s was my intro the au train of thought and I fell in love with it. Andrew’s throwback memory is their art from the above linked post and the whole thing is worth seeing again even if you’ve already seen it 😂💕)
Anyway Aaron, new counterargument: what if Neil brought Andrew a little treat tho
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let them smooch!!
((neil is bending his knees a lil so andrew can reach🙏🏻🙏🏻)
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I hope to god read-more cuts work on mobile, if not I am so SO sorry
a couple very disorganized and not very good photos from LA
USC campus featuring Tommy Trojan & Traveler
Campus bookstore and its very very red shirts, Lyon fitness center w the adjacent aquatics center
DINOSAURS
A wretched shot of Expo Park where I have crammed the Gold Court
Westfield Culver City (mall) which in 2007 was named Fox Hills according to wiki
BEACH (fuck the beach)
#AHHHHHH#MY HOME#I can’t believe you were 5 mins away from me nora….#aftg#all for the game#the foxhole court#it looks so different from someone else’s eyes
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