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terr-arium · 6 days
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why are french people rude?
Ah well, the safest explanation when an entire country’s people are stereotyped as rude is that they have their own culture with different criteria for politeness than the ones you are used to. It’s probably easier for Americans to forget this than for the rest of the world, because they consume less foreign media than the rest of us (from literature in translation to foreign films) and are less exposed to aspects of foreign cultures that could inform them about different norms of politeness (online interactions happen in their own language and follow their own (anglo) social codes.) With this insular worldview it’s easy to take it for granted that American good manners are universal. They are not!
A very common gripe against American tourists in Paris is that they talk so loudly in public spaces, which is definitely rude here but I assume that in the US, people just have a different threshold for what constitutes ‘loud’ (I wonder if it is due to being used to having more space than Europeans). I also remember a discussion I had with one of my translation professors about the American concept of ‘active listening’ and how negatively it is perceived in France. It may be that in the US it is polite to make ‘listening noises’ at regular intervals while someone is speaking to you, ‘uh huh’, ‘right’, ‘yeah’, ‘really?’, and that you would perceive someone who just stands there silently as disinterested or thinking about something else. In France it is more polite to shut up and listen (with the occasional nod or ‘mmh’) and it’s rather seen as annoying and rude to make a bunch of useless noise while someone is speaking.
There are of course countless examples like that. The infamous rude waiters in Parisian cafés probably seem a lot more rude and cold to people who have a different food culture… People from other cultures might consider a waiter terrible at his job if he doesn’t frequently check on them to make sure they don’t wait for anything, but the idea that a meal is a pleasant experience rather than just a way to feed yourself (esp when eating out) means we like having time to chat and just enjoy our table for a while, so we don’t mind as much waiting to order or for the next course. French people would typically hate if an overzealous waiter took the initiative to bring the note once we’re done with our meal so we don’t have to wait for it, as it would be interpreted as “you’re done, now get out of my restaurant.”
The level of formality required to be seen as polite is quite high in France, which might contribute to French people being seen as rude by people with a more casual culture. To continue with waiters, even in casual cafés they will address clients with the formal you and conversely, and won’t pretend to be your friend (the fact that we don’t have the American tip culture also means they don’t feel the need to ingratiate themselves to you.) I remember being alarmed when a waitress in New York introduced herself and asked how I was doing. “She’s giving me her first name? What… am I supposed to with it? Use it?” It gave me some insight on why Americans might consider French waiters rude or sullen! It might also be more accepted outside of France to customise your dish—my brother worked as a waiter and often had to say “That won’t be possible” about alterations to a dish that he knew wouldn’t fly with the chef, to foreign tourists who were stunned and angry to hear that, and probably brought home a negative opinion of French waiters. In France where the sentiment in most restaurants is more “respect the chef’s skill” than “the customer is king”, people are more likely to be apologetic if they ask for alterations (beyond basic stuff) as you can quickly be seen as rude, even by the people you are eating with. 
And I remember reading on a website for learning English that the polite answer to “How are you?” is “I’m fine, thank you!” because it’s rude to burden someone you aren’t close to with your problems. In my corner of the French countryside the polite thing to do is to complain about some minor trouble, because saying everything is going great is perceived negatively, as boasting, and also as a standoffish reply that kind of shuts down the conversation, while grumbling about some problem everyone can relate to will keep it going. (French people love grumbling as a positive bonding activity!)
Basically, before you settle on the conclusion that people from a different place are collectively rude, consider that if you travel there and scrupulously follow your own culture’s social code of good manners, you might be completely unaware that you are being perceived as obnoxious, rude or unfriendly yourself simply because your behaviour clashes with what is expected by locals.
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terr-arium · 11 days
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abstract and modern art haters are sooo snobby like klein literally Created an entirely new pigment and then painted a canvas in a way where the brush strokes wouldn't be visible. the insinuation that people with no skill could reproduce that is so annoying because unless you are skilled at color mixing and painting you definitely couldn’t lmao
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terr-arium · 16 days
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Uhtred + text posts
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terr-arium · 16 days
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taglist: @foxyanon @alexagirlie @sihtricsafin @neonhairspray @gemini-mama @lexwolfhale @sigtryggrswifey @skyofficialxx @djarinsgirl27 @m-a-s-h-k-a @verenahx @mrsarnasdelicious @diiickbrainn @little-diable @maii777 @urmomsgirlfriend1 @dixie-elocin @elle4404 @bubblyabs @ylvie50 @succnfuccubus @hb8301 @willowbrookesblog @apolloanddaphnis @jennifer0305 @carnationworld @justanother-sihtricgirlie @stark-head @il0vebeingdelulu @thenameswinter99
If you want to be added to/removed from the taglist, message me 🖤
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terr-arium · 17 days
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ive gotten so much mileage out of this tweet. every time i see something on the internet that makes me mad i just think to myself "people in real life: hey man how's it going" and i keep it pushing
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terr-arium · 18 days
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terr-arium · 18 days
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Remember in 2010 when Taio Cruz said "I throw my hands up in the air sometimes"? I appreciated his restraint. You can't just throw your hands up in the air whenever. There's a time and a place, and that time was 2010, and the place was the club.
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terr-arium · 18 days
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listening to this podcast about how the french are culturally mandated to take a 1 to 2 hour lunch break away from the workplace during which its looked down upon to talk about work. which is unfortunately the sexiest thing ive ever heard
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terr-arium · 18 days
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It's a shame that Thomas is forever known for his doubt, because he has one of the most beautiful expressions of faith in the Gospels.
Doubt is only where his story starts. He's the only skeptic of the group because he's the only one who wasn't there at the first sighting. It's easy for the others to believe--they've already seen Jesus. Thomas, by only believing what he sees, is doing nothing less than what the other apostles have done. Yet as soon as he sees Jesus, he expresses faith that goes far beyond what they have shown.
His response to seeing Jesus isn't, "Oh, they were telling the truth." It's not, "You really are Jesus," or even, "You really are alive."
The first thing he says is, "My Lord and my God!"
This isn't just Thomas confirming facts. This isn't him building a scaffolding of observation and logic to work his way to understanding. This is him falling headfirst into the bright light of truth. He instantly understands that this is much more than one man risen from the dead, that the world is far more glorious than even the other apostles believed. His God is standing before him, and he doesn't hesitate to adore.
Thomas believes because he sees, but this belief goes far beyond what he can see. His exclamation isn't just an acceptance of the reality in front of his eyes, but a belief in a reality that is impossible to see or know without the gift of faith that comes from encountering the Risen Christ. The revelation and the faith are divine gifts, and Thomas' response to them is beautiful, and I think he deserves more credit for it.
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terr-arium · 25 days
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Watching my toddler figure out how to language is fascinating. Yesterday we were stumped when he kept insisting there was a “Lego winner” behind his bookshelf - it turned out to be a little Lego trophy cup. Not knowing the word for “trophy”, he’d extrapolated a word for “thing you can win”. And then, just now, he held up his empty milk container and said, “Mummy? It’s not rubbish. It’s allowed to be a bottle.” - meaning, effectively, “I want this. Don’t throw it away.” But to an adult ear, there’s something quite lovely about “it’s allowed to be a bottle,” as if we’re acknowledging that the object is entitled to keep its title even in the absence of the original function.
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terr-arium · 1 month
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terr-arium · 1 month
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Not to tell anyone in a horror story what to do, but:
Forests are normally loud.
They're full of life. There's endless animals that live there. They make noises. Lots of them.
If you ever are in a forest and it's quiet, that's not right. That means something is very wrong. You should probably either be similarly quiet until you can figure out what's going on, or you should get out of there very quickly.
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terr-arium · 1 month
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terr-arium · 1 month
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The first funny bitch was Cain, who straight up lied to God after killing his brother.
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terr-arium · 1 month
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Alfred: Do you take constructive criticism?
Uhtred: No, only cash or Bebbanburg.
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terr-arium · 1 month
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the last kingdom + happy moments
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terr-arium · 1 month
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taglist: @clairacassidy @finanmoghra @uunotheangel @hb8301 @bathedinheat @neonhairspray @anaeve @bubblyabs @travelingmypassion @sylasthegrim @andakth @chompchompluke @willowbrookesblog @lady-targaryens-world @skyofficialxx @diosademuerte @elle4404 @alexagirlie @sweetxime @solango @gemini-mama @cheyennep3107 @little-diable @jennifer0305 @drwstarkeyy @mrsarnasdelicious @verenahx @urmomsgirlfriend1 @moonchildrenandflowercrowns @foxyanon @synindoodles @sigtryggrswifey @liandav
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