!!!!!!!

hey i know i asked for constructive criticism but what i actually wanted was for you to tell me i'm extremely talented. and also pretty. sorry if that was unclear

[guy who genuinely fucking loathes himself voice] well on account of my charming and endearing nature. Of course

*coughs up blood* i mean im pretty chill you know nothing really gets to me and

You can really tell I was neglected as a child

sorry i sound unhinged and insane, do you still wanna fuck?

every time i make a mistake im like theyre going to put me down like a sick dog

"would you fuck your clone" = boring, who cares, the answer says nothing about you other than whether or not you're your own type

"would you fuck MY clone" = unexpected, high potential to cause a lot of 'why would you fuck my clone and not me?' drama, reasonable question to ask if you're a mad scientist

just saw this and it made me sob.

is it ok if i eat a grilled cheese for dinnar. is it ok to put spinach on it and banana peppers. can i put red onions on it too or is that to much will i get hunted and killed

went to my gf's house for dinner. had her drink the wine her parents offered me in case it was poisoned. needless to say they were impressed by my political savviness and her one-sided willingness to die for me

online posting is like military combat and im the brave general and you are all the footsoldiers fighting in the tranches

Dried mango is so good it’s like a drug or something what do they put in there

can you come collect your freak of a man please. He’s doing things

remember when harambe died