i, too, wish i could kiss my way out of all my problems like a BL boy

Judging you for your bsd kins except im a fucking cunt about it also im not including images because im in chemistry fuck yourself if that bugs you

if you point out the fact that these get longer as they go on then die pls <3

Dazai

Well arent you Unique. not like 90% of the fandom kins him or anything, cant say i dont kin him myself of course but i dont Kin Him i just kin him seriously tho if dazai is your top bsd kin stay 500 feet away from me and maybe take a bath while youre at it. your sense of humor is probably just uncensored depraved sexual posting and its fucking annoying shut up please. hardcore dazai kinnies suck so so bad but god damn you are all so annoying and i want to fuck you so bad (derogatory) i can make u worse babygirl please dm me. you need psychological help and not in a omg ur brocken way.... in a you should be lobotomized and pushed off a bridge way (affectionate)

Atsushi

do. do atsushi kinnies exist i thought that was just another word for furry. idk ill try my best um embracing my inner akutagawa kinnie pls kill yourself and kiss me on the lips. man seriously tho i didnt know atsushi kinnies were real are they just akutagawa kinnies in anger management. idk um. whore. bet u have an awful haircut. is that why you kin him fucko did you see the gay little tiger and his awful haircut and go hes just like me fr fr. is this your truth. your backstory. bitch.

Akutagawa

starting this off by saying if u kin him and ur ablebodied u should die. i dont think his disability is that relevent to his Angst but i love to be a hater. if u are disabled then cmere baby lets kiss im self loathing too hows ur relationship with ur dad. i bet ur bangs r why he left u. yeah i said it fuck you and your bangs. self callout i havent cut my bangs in 288485 years but its fine. i think we dont talk about the fact that akutagawa is canonically hot. as an akutagawa kinnie im allowed to say all akutagawa kinnies are hot unless ur one of the following. 1. ablebodied 2. have never lived in poverty 3. cis 4. idk fuckin. from michigan my akutagawa headcanon is that he hates michigan fuck yourself if ur from michigan

Ranpo

ranpo kinnies are such a mixed bag bc half of them are actually cool people who are probably autistic and the other half are the kids who thought they could genuinely solve the kira case. if u interpretat his lore as oh hes gifted kid burnout i think u need to sit down and tell me one time when hes burned out ever except the one part with mushitarou (is that how u spell his name idk hes ugly (affectionate)) yes honey i understand that youre too smart for this world and above everything but please go to bed you have school in the morning. if youve ever made an edit of ranpo to one of those like. little miss perfect type songs or averager or something please stay the fuck away from me. those songs fuck but god u are annoying

Yosano

ok real talk what is her backstory not even in a pretentious oh the writing is bad way i mean it in a i cant fucking read this is a cry for help someone please explain it to me. ok onto making fun of you. sterotyping is bad but also literally no yosano kinnie ive ever seen hasnt been nmlnm (non man loving non man) like this isnt even me being like haha ur a lesbian this is just a fact you like women dont you. seriously tho what is there to say about yosano i dont think i can comment on this shes property of the gays im sorry live laugh yosano ig

Chuuya

just spilled energy drink in my tits anyways if you were one of those kids slash still are one of those people whos like omg im so short and chaotic im a smol angry bean ill take ur knees out than im revoking your chuuya kin card 'oh but lucien you cant-' dont care didnt ask plus you only care about chuuya in the context of dazai. if you havent read stormbringer and u kin him shut up the adults are talking. i technically havent read stormbringer but my babygirl @chaotictransmess mansplained it to me so im infinitely hotter than all of you. please god please dm me if u kin chuuya and arent fucking annoying my legs are spread please baby

Fyodor

oh so ur a dazai kinnie (individuality complex edition) and youve read edgar allen poe wow.....ur one of those people who shits on others for saying crime and punishment is too long. NO ONE CARES THAT YOU READ THE WHOLE THING ITS LONG AND BORING AND YOURE A VIRGIN KAY WHY ESS SWEATY. this isnt directed at my beloved rowan ofc you can do no wrong /p fyodor kinnies are an unholy intersection between the worst dazai kinnies and the worst ranpo kinnies please shut up no one cares how fucked up you think the world is you live in suburbia shut up shut up shut up shut up. you absolutely used to lie on the internet to say you were french or russian or something in like 7th grade.

Nikolai

do you actually kin him or are you an XD crackhead. you probably go oh yeah my music taste is pretty wild and then its willwood and the cats the musical soundtrack. if youre an actual nikolai kinnie and not just an edgy 14 year old please stay away from me. not in a oh em gee ur so twisted way no u probably just smell bad and dress ugly and i dont want to be seen with u. you probably jokingly hit on your friends and jokingly make fun of them and no one finds it funny. dont worry babygirl i'll appreciate you like they never could please give me a chance. nikolai kinnies are hot as fuck until they arent. not saying anything else nice bc any validation you fucks get goes straight to your cock.

Kouyou

...mommy? 🥺

Poe

do you kin poe or do you wanna fuck ranpo so bad but you have too much internalized cringe to read x reader fics. ive said this 7 times but jesus fuck bsd fans shower challenge. you were one of those kids who got mad into those like. talking animals series but not like warriors and animorphs kids no im talking guardians of ga hoole. you wanna write so bad but anytime you fuck up you cry and bash your head against the wall and listen to mitski again i am sneaking dog anxiety meds into a hot dog for you. i cant even be mean on this one yall r like dying puppies who live in allies jesus yall bum me the fuck out

Kyouka

i havent seen anyone else kin kyouka so im doing this for myself ig. suprisingly enough despite being a massive cunt i kin the uwu smol bean of the fandom. kyouka isnt a smol bean ofc bsd fans just cant read i think. guys shes murdered people all she did was cry about it a few time guys pls shes not ur poor meow meow shes a traumatized child

Kunikida

the token Bsd Fan That Showers. guys pls kunikida kinnies this is a cry for help no one here has even read the light novels Heple. seriously tho i cant think of anything mean to say about kunikida kinnies. not like any of you would admit to kinning him publicly bc u think kinning is below you. ik being like omg ur 'insert sex thing' is cringe however no kunikida kinnies fuck its part of the job description please get laid

final thoughts

ok so basically like. 1. tell me if u want me to make fun of any other kinnies 2. yada yada yada this is all in good fun i didnt mean any of this pls dont spam report me badly dressed 15 year olds of tumblr 🥺🥺🥺 3. before one of you failed abortions decides to come in my notes like 'oh man does making fun of people make u feel better about yourself. we're just having fun ☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️' the answer is yes it does make me feel better about myself i am a hater first and a person second and also i dont care if ur just having fun guess what fuckwad im having fun too now shut up <3

ok but in all seriousness i dont give a fuck who you kin and why and you shouldnt care about my opinions i want to fuck monty gator from fnaf and i kin the little gay elf wizard from the adventure zone and one time i ate gum off the floor cringe culture is dead girl if wearing an ugly trenchcoat and a amazon body harness over a death note t shirt makes u happy go do it. but in a genuine note a word to the bsd fandom PLEASE LEARN READING COMPREHENSION JESUS FUCK FOR A FANDOM REVOLVING AROUND A SERIES ABOUT DEAD AUTHORS YOU GUYS LITERALLY CANT READ ANYTHING EVER SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP anyways xoxo girlie pls like and subscribe like i said give me requests for other bsd characters making fun of people is my passion

all the ones that have a 6 in them

oh boy thats a lot rofl,,,

6. What kind of people are you attracted to?that’s a good question because my taste in people is cryptid-tier so im not really qualified to answer this question16. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again?i don’t think i’ve ever like.. proper kissed anyone beyond like Family Kisses(tm)? i kissed my lil brother good night tonight tho 10/10 would forehead smooch again (hes a cute kid)26. What do you do when you wake up?scream in agony, put my glasses on, check discord. in that order36. Have you ever liked someone and never told them?uhh,,, no i don’t think so actually rofl. usually it ends up coming out eventually cuz im a desperate fucko that cant keep their mouth shut46. What are you paranoid about?what am i NOT paranoid about come on

56. Favourite colour?i really like shades of teal and cyan!! blues and greens are my Jam nowadays but greyscale/monochrome stuff is perpetual mood so60. Ever won a competition? For what?nope61. Been suspended/expelled? For what?i bit a bus driver’s finger in like 1st grade and got suspended for that but it was an accident and its a long story62. Been arrested? For what?kinda? i got into a car accident once that was kinda my fault cuz i had a panic attack on the road but i didnt get like.. actually Jailed(tm) or anything so63. Ever been in love? i want to stop being in love with people???? it hurts and is annoying and it’s very very rarely returned 64. Tell us the story of your first kiss?i’ll tell it as soon as it happens65. Are you hungry right now?im always hungry66. Do you like your tumblr friends more than your real friends?if by “real” friends you mean irl friends then yes because something is better than nothing, if by “real” you mean the handful of people i trust immensely and spend a lot of time with then nah because i find it harder to keep up with people on here so all of my super close friends are on discord rofl67. Facebook or Twitter?twitter rofl i dont touch facebook68. Twitter or Tumblr?i use tungle more but again i have trouble keepin up with people outside of discord rofl69. Are you watching tv right now?nah and i very rarely am76. What colour is your underwear?uhhh right now light blue rofl86. Favourite character from Finding Nemo?i relate to dory on a deep emotional and spiritual level96. Favourite actress?honestly couldn’t say, i don’t really keep track of actors/actresses cuz i dont watch much in the way of tv or movies106. Ever broken someone’s heart?god i hope the fuck not rofl (it’s unlikely because with few exceptions people don’t generally seem to develop feelsTM for me)116. Are you listening to music right now?i was a lil bit ago and probably will again after im done with this but at this exact second no126. Are you currently bored?slightly136. Do you sleep with your doors open or closed?doesn’t really matter to me and the room i sleep in technically doesn’t have doors really cuz i kinda adopted the game room as my bedroom a few years back so

146. Was today a good day?it was aight i had to work but when i got home i streamed ark for my friends for a while so

Ali & Carly

Ali: Heyo boo Ali: thanks for Rocky wrangling with me today, you're now also his fave so, add that to your tally Carly: its k i had fun Carly: hes a cutie & cool kid Ali: me too Ali: yeah, he's alright, but cocky enough so I ain't telling him Ali: dunno where he gets that from 😏 Carly: ha Carly: yea idk Carly: no clue Ali: i'm sorry Ro was being off btw, I'm working out why but trust it wasn't you, babe Ali: been neglecting her lately, everyone wants a piece of me Ali: hard life Carly: idc its me too Carly: nobody wants a piece but you Ali: I just told you that ain't true, and Rocky is ruthless, he called one of my customers a 'big bum witch' the other day Ali: no tip for me, thanks dickhead Ali: but I want all of you regardless Ali: willing to throw hands Carly: aw Carly: this town is full of big bum witches tho Carly: my ma back for one Carly: but are you willing to use those hands for good too or Ali: awks if that was your Ma, like hey gurl, I think you rock it Ali: your daughter ain't bad either Ali: you know it, IOU 'cos we couldn't make like we were in the backrow of the cinema Carly: unless she been lying about where she at i think youve avoided meeting the in laws again Carly: k cuz you kno i need to collect soon Carly: bored Carly: just back and zoned out so fast Ali: ain't even got exciting stories from their galavanting? fucking rude Ali: at least when we go AWOL we also go wild Ali: make things happen, lads Carly: my ma's good for nothing but hairspray and peroxide Carly: only use if i get beat up again Carly: my da's good for cash tho if you wanna get wild w me Ali: or you wanna single white female me Ali: which would be a disappointing outcome to say the least Ali: can't tonight babe, I've gotta have some sister time Ali: go hard for both of us Carly: k Carly: try not to miss me bad when shes talking about me Ali: oh babe, she will not, and if she does I'll set her straight Ali: gonna let the world know you're my 😇 Carly: whatever her issue shes gotta air it and youre her sister so you gotta hear it Carly: idc shes not gonna hurt me w it Carly: and setting peeps straight is the opposite of how you do, babe Ali: true Ali: idk what issue she could have though, you're a literal ray of sunshine Ali: true again 😏 Ali: ugh, imma miss you Ali: maybe i can sneak out when she's gone to bed, the 'rents too Carly: i miss you now Carly: cant hear my parents say shit Carly: i just wanna talk to you Carly: dont tell me maybe & keep me waiting tho Ali: i will Ali: promise Carly: i dont wanna make trouble for you Carly: w anyone Carly: you can stay w her if you need to stay Ali: You won't Ali: I can do both Ali: be back before first light Ali: even if I'll miss watching the sun rise on your face 😔 Ali: we've got the night, baby Carly: but you kno if ive got you for the whole night youre gonna fall asleep Carly: thats what im good at Carly: feel free to tell your sister thats why you like me ha Carly: fun & tiring its magic Ali: hmm, we'll see who wears who out first, babe Ali: and if I am that husband, then you'll just have to wake me up with morning sex like the good little wifey you are 😘😂 Carly: always bringing that confidence i like it Carly: k but if my parents wake up too you can explain its a duty thing yea i had to like Ali: i like you Ali: for so many reasons and imma show you all of 'em tonight Ali: fuck that Ali: stay out with me, its warm enough Ali: i'll trace all the constellations out with my tongue so you won't ever forget Ali: educational Carly: my ma is asking me what im blushing about Carly: i told her what you said but she's not a believer Carly: support my education bitch Carly: ha Ali: i mean, i'd offer to let her see the benefits for herself but Ali: not gonna win me any brownie points 'cos she won't take me up on it Carly: she dont kno what she's missing but i do Carly: wish you were here Ali: me too Ali: start the party without me babe, i don't mind Carly: too late if you do Carly: gotta get through this reunion some way Ali: they aren't making you watch a slideshow, are they? Ali: fate worse than death Ali: Maybe you could go to Ronan's? Lmao, he's been up in my pussy way too much since he found out about us...didn't think we were THAT loud but ok boy Carly: yea Carly: might do cuz same Carly: but what if i miss you he can really make a night of it when he wants Ali: Nah, I won't let you face that disappointment, babe Ali: my spidey senses will tingle like not on my watch, fuckboy Carly: aw Carly: you gonna come get me? Carly: thats no way to get him out your pussy babe fyi Ali: yeah Ali: I know but I like the idea of showing you off as mine Ali: but no sharing, he only gets to watch and be mad he fucked it up Carly: i like it too Carly: youre hot when youre oneupping fuckboys Carly: i thought i knew how to do it best but k youre flipping the script Ali: as long as i'm besting them i'm doing my job right Ali: gotta keep you on-board Carly: speak of the devil Carly: how he know i was alone & horny Carly: my parents have only gone to the shops its uncanny Ali: know your neighbours but bit stalkerish, pal Ali: i'll text him to fuck off, freak him out Ali: how does she know, ha, two can play this game fucko and I'm more committed Carly: ha Carly: you gotta Carly: hes smoking im gonna bum one see what line he tries to lay on before the text sends Ali: On it Ali: gotta let him know there's a queue to court the princess now and he's at the back, soz Carly: he likes hitting it from the back he wont be put off Carly: im gonna show him some of the hot pics i took of you tho Ali: when is he ever tbf? 🐶👅💦 Carly: true Carly: that fucking cute tho aren't i Ali: you know it babe Carly: hes talking to my da now Carly: kill me Ali: how fucking dare he Ali: knowing he has the upper hand with the man bants Ali: i know how to change a tire too! love me! Carly: if my ma invites him in for tea im out of here Carly: she will think hes hot under the collar for her & bitch thats my groundwork Ali: Run baby run Ali: what kinda moron is he tho Ali: coulda had a private show if you just waited, now its all saturday night telly and flat lager Carly: you kno i have nowhere to go if you dont want me babe Carly: facts Carly: he likes me now he cant have me what a fucking Carly: like i wouldve fucked you but im not getting w you Ali: i do, is this full sos crisis mode though? 'cos i need to be good for a lil while longer yet Ali: such a typical bloke move that Ali: bet he ain't the only boy in ur inbox, not a pun Ali: 'cos he ain't in mine like 🙄 Carly: its k your sister needs you Carly: i can keep walking Carly: loads of other lads on site as well as in my inbox Carly: & they arent trying to say hi to me before we get down to it nevermind my parents Ali: 😾 Carly: why so sad blue eyed boo Ali: i don't like how lads treat you Ali: i'm not jealous, like swear to god, even though i obviously want you all to myself, i get it Ali: but i'm not about how shit they are to you, even if you don't care, they should care to be decent humans Carly: thats not lads its everyone Carly: youre the only one treating me different Carly: they dont know how else to be Carly: made my bed babe Ali: nah Ali: you don't deserve half the shit you get, that's bullshit Ali: and even the rest, people just don't wanna try to understand or be good, heaven forfend they inconvineince themselves for one second, like Carly: if im a slag im a slag i dont get to put conditions on it Carly: if it was a film maybe Carly: but theres no romance coming my way from theres and i dont want it Ali: why can't you just be you? someone who likes fucking, among other things Ali: not romance just like...not being a cunt Ali: idk Ali: pisses me off Carly: cuz you don't run the world even tho you strut it like you do and i love it Ali: not yet, babe Ali: one day, and you can be my right hand woman Carly: yea? Carly: take me w you & ill take you to all your fave places k Ali: k Ali: we'll be fun forever, I promise you Carly: gotta be Ali: you know i like you even when you ain't tho Ali: don't tell Carly: who would i Carly: ronans got enough for his wank bank & nobody else is chatting to me rn Ali: exactly, ruins the illusion and fantasy when they realise i care about you Ali: so unsexy of me Carly: youre sexy to me Carly: idc what they think Ali: good Ali: me either Carly: i like you too you kno Ali: yeah Ali: i had my suspicions Carly: i dont have any subtlety sorry about it Ali: Don't be Ali: I love it Ali: not enough people say what they mean or want, ever Carly: waste Carly: k i wasnt shouting how bad i wanted to kiss you before i did but not cuz i was bothered about me Ali: agreed Ali: sometimes you can't know you want something until you've got it Ali: i get it Carly: you get me Carly: its weird Ali: 🔮 Carly: ha Carly: k what am i thinking now Ali: wouldn't be proper to say Ali: tut tut bad girl Ali: like how you think though Carly: fuck Carly: youre good Ali: 🤷 don't mean to brag but remember that phrase you'll be screaming it later Ali: such a Ronan line, I can't 😂 Carly: but true Carly: not like when he says it Ali: 😍 Carly: what you doing w your sister Carly: gotta live through that cuz bored Ali: Fixing my weave Ali: getting into a white girl dread territory over here Ali: then gonna do some 🔮 forreal Ali: get ready for me to be even more of a know it all baby Carly: cute Carly: tell me my future i got some shit from another neighbor & im waiting for it to kick Carly: hows it gonna treat me Carly: needing a good trip Ali: we'll see who gets the answer first Ali: you got anything for me? Carly: yea Carly: they mystery but i kno you arent scared Carly: & you got me doing a test run rn lying on here on the grass Ali: 🌌 be there before it fades away my space explorer Carly: if you find me at a bad end prob dont take it Ali: is one of the lads trip sitting you Carly: so he reckons but hes drinking so theres no trust Carly: & he gave me it Carly: his game could be me lights out idk Ali: keep texting me, okay babe? Ali: if shit gets too real, tell me and I'll come early Ali: my sis is cool now, she gets what we're doing, she was just confused Carly: aw Carly: youre sweet Carly: you told her you like me Ali: 'course I did Ali: I ain't ashamed Ali: I'm proud Carly: youre gonna make me cry Ali: You're special, Carly Ali: You're gonna see Carly: I just wanna see you tho Ali: Me too Ali: I'm gonna make her some chamomile tea and then I'm coming, yeah? Carly: but thats not fair to her Carly: she's not gonna be a fan of me Ali: I've promised her more time tomorrow Ali: You need me rn Carly: but what if i want you to stay Carly: what are we gonna do then Ali: i'll stay until you're ready for me to go Carly: you mean that? Ali: yes Ali: promise, imma take care of you Carly: but theres nothing in it for you Carly: youve already got me you dont have to Ali: i wanna keep you Ali: and not just selfishly Ali: you gotta stick around, you're too cool to go anywhere, okay Carly: k Carly: im here & if you wanna be im not stopping you Ali: good Ali: i wanna be wherever you are Carly: i kept you pills back the lads didnt want me to but idc about them & you can follow me in now Ali: fuck them Ali: just me and you Carly: yea Carly: ill look after you too Ali: 😇 Ali: i know, i trust you Carly: idk if you should Carly: but i like it Ali: willing to take my chances Ali: you're worth it Carly: thats you Ali: i'm so glad i met you Carly: me too Carly: not that i met me thats weird Carly: you know what i mean Ali: i got you Ali: not high yet 😉 Carly: id seen you around before you guardian angel'd me that night Carly: thats weird too Carly: that i didnt see you how i do now Ali: it is Ali: you were always cute but Ali: idk, i can't claim to have seen this in my crystal ball Carly: thats cuz i wasnt cute i was a state Carly: & youd have more likely seen me sucking ronans dick Carly: look away babe you dont need to have that image in your mind Ali: don't need him reckoning he plays part in any of my fantasies, nah Ali: you can't not be cute, no matter how you try, soz babe Carly: you can't not be so sweet to me can you Ali: dunno Ali: not tried Carly: idk what id do if you did Carly: i got used to it Ali: got no plans to stop Ali: unless you ask me to, like Carly: thats not gonna be what i ask you to do Carly: trust me Ali: you can tell me all about it Ali: 5 minutes, tops Carly: okay