wdym he doesnt listen too ethel cain, lingua ignota, björk qnd arca???

(im pushing all my hyperfixations onto him.)

¬ romance headcanons.

NAME:  cain manning (yeah thats right im doing this for this Old Ass Man i bet everyones so glad theyre following me) NICKNAME:  c...cainy....no thats non canonical hes just cain GENDER:  Old ROMANTIC ORIENTATION:  b...bi..... hes bi PREFERRED PET NAMES:  GOD IDFK THIS IS HARD I REGRET THIS. hes more likely to use pet names than have them used for him and he’d call ada darlin like A Lot but i guess ada sometimes called him honey or hon RELATIONSHIP STATUS:  permanently Just Divorced From A Cult Leader Who Is Also The Mother Of His Children in his eyes, like, he’s not really LOOKING for anything but...idk does anybody wanna kiss this old man????? hes single FAVORITE CANON SHIP:  jdhfgkhdfg i mean cain and ada were cute before they joined a cult i guess FAVORITE NON-CANON SHIP:  cain x a good time

OPINION ON TRUE LOVE:  idk i think he’s kind of jaded on love because he really honestly did love ada for a long time but that all fell away from him and it’s left him in a really shitty situation and i think now he puts more stock in things like the absolutely unkillable love from a good father to his child than arbitrary romantic love which can diminish in certain situations. like he will always always love ethel and elijah no matter what they do or say to him, but it’s more complicated with ada. he wouldn’t put his life on it. OPINION ON LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT:  he definitely thinks it’s dumb and not real HOW ‘ROMANTIC’ ARE THEY?:  he means well... lately he’s been kind of living for himself in a lot of ways so i think he’s less romantic than he used to be, but when he was ~courting ada he would write her songs and stuff........ dumb ass IDEAL PHYSICAL TRAITS:  PURELY physically he likes when ppl are taller than him IDEAL PERSONALITY TRAITS:  uhhh one thing that really sticks out to him is people who have tattoos, he likes to know why they got them and he’s not one of those people that thinks all tattoos need to have meaning but he will very genuinely ask if they Do have meaning. ALSO: people who are just happy and smile a lot!!! it’s nice!!!!

UNATTRACTIVE PHYSICAL TRAITS:  uhhhhh i honestly think at this point he’s like...just too old to be picky really UNATTRACTIVE PERSONALITY TRAITS:  people who try to manipulate others to their way of thinking, people who don’t listen to (cain’s) reason, The Family Guy Style Of Humour, people who are myopically negative to the point that they try to suck other people’s happiness away from them. also he feels more comfortable around people who aren’t strongly religious, though he’s not one of those shitty atheists. he’s happy for people to have their own belief systems, he’s just nervous around them. IDEAL DATE:  idk i think at this point he would just be surprised and happy enough to go on a date that he wouldn’t really care what it was like DO THEY HAVE A TYPE?  yeah but he’d never admit it AVERAGE RELATIONSHIP LENGTH:  i mean he was with ada for like more than 20 years and before that he’d had precisely one girlfriend for like 5 years so...Long Time PREFERRED NON-SEXUAL INTIMACY:  idk, just chillin i guess COMMITMENT LEVEL:  he’s in for it if the other person was OPINION OF PUBLIC AFFECTION:  (IS_THIS_ALLOWED.VINE) he HATES IT mostly from straight ppl tho, he wouldn’t begrudge a same sex couple their public affection PAST RELATIONSHIPS?  2!!!! just 2!!!!!!

STOLEN FROM @patchworkman TAGGING WHOMEVER WANTS TO