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#writing essays to justify my otp by nitpicking at tiny little details
psychewritesbs · 1 year
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Right.
So... apparently there’s fans who believe that Athrun loved Lacus and that is why the memes about Kira stealing girlfriends exist. But I must admit I never got the impression that Athrun ever saw his engagement to Lacus as anything more than a political alliance that was in everybody’s best interest.
And watching GS again I have to say I am doubling down on my headcanon because... well...
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Their dynamic is so...
Basically Athrun is so not emotionally available to Lacus... like at all. 
It’s so Scorpio of him to put up emotional barriers any time she tries to get close. Like in the screencap above where he actually refuses her touch and walks away from her.
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And I get the sense that in the early episodes of GS Athrun didn’t understand what it meant for him to want to open up to someone and to actually want to be  present in a dynamic with someone. 
His dynamic with Lacus was something that was an expectation set by others after all. So there’s an element of forced interaction between the two of them.
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Yes, there’s all the haros he’s given her, so there is definitely a sense of Athrun expressing something about his inner self through the creation of objects that he then gives her. 
It’s just that given the current state of their interactions early on in GS + the fact that their engagement is very likely the result of a desirable political alliance because of their respective fathers, there’s an element of “doing what a good fiancé would do.”
I’ll not deny that he very likely cares for Lacus. I think it’s completely undeniable actually--the haros being evidence of it.
It’s just that in a situation such as theirs where they are initially forced to interact with one another because they are to be married someday, I imagine both Athrun and Lacus came into this engagement thinking “ok this is who I am supposed to marry” instead of “ok this is who I want to marry.”
And so the basis for their dynamic is this forced interaction that they both have to make work because other people have told them it needs to work. Both Athrun and Lacus then brought their own personalities into the dynamic in an attempt to meet this external expectation.
I also have to say that as a fellow water sign, I can’t imagine that Athrun found it satisfying to not feel an emotional resonance to Lacus. I say that because if he felt that emotional resonance, his attitude towards her would be different.
Instead, he appears to be annoyed by her...
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Hell, he didn't even seem to want to go on a rescue mission to find her when she disappeared and was picked up by the Archangel.
And even if the marriage wasn’t arranged by their parents (I don’t remember honestly) and Athrun and Lacus are childhood friends and he proposed to her...
He’s kind of a cranky and mean fiancé to her if I’m honest...
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I love Athrun but that was a dick thing to say, Lacus was worried about him and he turns his back on her and gives her a nasty answer. 
It doesn’t surprise me that Lacus ended with Kira because, unlike Athrun, Kira was able to meet her emotionally where she was at.
So I think that’s why later on in the story Athrun says that Lacus is his ex-fiancé because he was an idiot. He simply had not realized what he wanted because he was doing what was expected of him.
Living to fulfill other’s expectations without looking into one’s heart is always a recipe for disaster and unhappiness.
I think this is my third time watching GS (I swear just how I only read Soul Eater for Soul and Maka, I only watch GS for Athrun and for asucaga) and it’s really cool to be able to discern Athrun’s character arc at its early stages because part of his growth revolves around overcoming his daddy issues so that he can open up emotionally.
Ah, of course, I have to say that this ramble is inspired and influenced by this fantastic analysis that I found on the topic by someone else who agrees that Athrun cared for Lacus but didn’t love her in the romantic sense.
I have to admit that seeing how Athrun behaves with Lacus and comparing that to how he behaves with Cagalli is a dead giveaway of the state of his relationship with Lacus.
Anyways. 
Is there anyone out there in this fandom that still nerds out about this stuff?!!!!!!!!!
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