#who gives a fuck about south park they have sailor moon
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From top to bottom:
It’s Britney, bitch.
Kermit does drugs
A fluffing cat shirt
Some Bluey dolls that look like my sleep paralysis demons
A suit with designs of an anime I’ve NEVER seen
Harry Potter’s less successful brother, Larry Patter
And a South Park VHS
All found in an op shop!
#thrifting#shiftythrifting#submission#tw: drugs#tw: harry potter#music and video#harry potter shit#who gives a fuck about south park they have sailor moon#drug mention#shirts#ye olde meme#bluey#anime
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About Me: Favorite TV Shows
I'm gonna be honest with all of you: I'm not much of a TV show guy. I'm just typically not one who likes sinking a lot of time into something unless it's a video game with a lot to do in it. This is why I review movies; they're typically the perfect length for my easily-distracted ass to take in.
But still, there are plenty of shows that have broken that rule and managed to keep me engaged and coming back for more. Some of these are favorites from my childhood, while some of these are more recent shows I finally decided to watch. It's a nice mix, but the main thing here is that all of these shows are something truly special to me considering I took the time to watch them all.
There's a few honorable mentions to go over. The four biggest ones are The Simpsons, South Park, Family Guy, and Rick & Morty. I love all four of these shows... for the most part. My issue with all of them is that despite having stretches that are some of the greatest ever in TV history, they also have huge chunks of absolute dogshit to the point it is debated to this day at which point the shows fell off, or if they even managed to get back on. And sure, every show has bad stretches, but with most of these shows being long running programs and all of them being massive cultural phenomena, it sticks out a lot more. Rick & Morty in particular was hit really bad by this. The reason these shows don't get on while I have other long runners with bad stretches on the list is simple: When these shows are bad, they're offensively bad. Like the middle seasons of SpongeBob are bad, but at least they don't have his giant sperms come to life and impregnate his sister's egg to create a giant incest baby or have an overly long sequence in which he vomits after finding out he fucked a trans woman.
Other honorable mentions include: Batman Beyond, Chowder, Catscratch, Codename: Kids Next Door, Fraggle Rock, Good Omens, Malcolm in the Middle, Heroes, Cardcaptor Sakura, Invader Zim, Ben 10, Gargoyles, and The Mandalorian.
30. Captain Planet and the Planeteers
I had to find a way to squeeze one "so bad it's good" show on the list, but how? Making a show that's pure camp is more difficult than making a movie like that... but they somehow found a way by giving us the adventures of racially diverse eco-warriors fighting against pollution with the held of an absolutely ripped planetary avatar with a green mullet who spouts an endless stream of cheesy puns and one-liners that would make even Schwarzenegger's Mr. Freeze take pause. Every time this show is on, you bet your ass I'm sitting down and watching; it's the most beautiful cheese there is.
29. Bluey
My wife and I caught this on TV during a Disney vacation and we ended up loving it! This turned out to be a blessing, because a while later we had our first kid and she's obsessed with the show (she's going as Bingo for Halloween this year). It's such a cute, charming children's show with relatable messages for both kids and parents, as well as a shockingly good score. It genuinely is one of the best pieces of children's media out there, much better than shlock like Cailou or Peppa Pig (are those shows even still on?).
28. Jackie Chan Adventures
Cartoons based on celebrities tend to suck balls, but maybe they were picking the wrong celebrities the whole time. Maybe instead of MC Hammer, they should have picked everyone's favorite homophobic, PETA-supporting Chinese nationalist action star, Jackie Chan! This show is literally the Saturday morning cartoon. It really had it all: Wild animated action, mystical artifacts acquired through Indiana Jones-esque adventures. all sorts of crazy monsters and supernatural entities, and memorable characters like my man Tohru, who walked so Prince Zuko could run.
27. Sailor Moon
I think everyone remembers their first anime, and this was mine. My mom loved the show, so I ended up watching it a lot back when it was airing on the early iterations of Toonami, and it has made me a lifelong magical girl fan. Maybe Cardcaptor Sakura and PPMM did that whole thing better, but neither show had Sailor Mars, my first anime crush. All that aside, the cheesiness and the sheer earnest power of love and friendship that managed to solve every problem is just peak fiction... I just wish it was nearly as good as the manga.
26. Green Eggs and Ham
If you told me way back when that someday there would be an adaptation of the Dr. Seuss book famous for containing a very limited number of words that expanded on the story, added drama, and threw in a villain who is a blatant spoof of former president and eternal idiot Donald Trump, I think I might have stared at you in utter confusion. And if you told me this show would actually be good, I'd be doubly confused. Thankfully, the show is really damn good, with an impressive cast and good humor that manages to capture the whimsy of the wubbulous world of Dr. Seuss perfectly.
25. Inhumanoids
I think everyone has a soft spot for an 80s toy commercial, but where most would pick Transformers, My Little Pony, or Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, my favorite of the lot was this obscure gem of a show. It's such a fun introduction of horror and Lovecraftian abominations to a young audience, and a lot of it is still unsettling and dark to this day. D'Compose will eternally haunt my nightmares between that raspy voice and the gruesome transformations he inflicts on his victims. Good shit!
24. Danny Phantom
Forget that stupid fairy show, this right here is the best thing Butch Hartman ever put his name on. It's a loving tribute to comic book superheroes in the same way Ben 10 was, but I think this show is ever-so-slightly better due to its blend of supernatural and sci-fi working really well (and also it doesn't retcon all magic as being alien energy or whatever the fuck they did with Gwen in the sequel series). The only thing holding it back from a higher spot is how hilariously bad the finale is and the rather scattershot quality of the final season in general. Too many loose plot threads hanging for my taste.
23. The Boys
Seth Rogen has seemingly made it his mission in life to adapt all of Garth Ennis' work in a way that makes it not suck ass, and boy am I here for it. Adapting one of Garthy-boy's most repulsive and spiteful works and turning it into a genuinely great superhero show that satirizes celebrity culture instead of just taking a huge shit all over comic book superheroes was really the way to go, and watching Anthony Starr and Karl Urban command the screen every time they take center stage is a blast. Sure, it's still gory and lowbrow, but it's done in a way where it's honestly appealing as opposed to whatever the fuck Ennis was doing.
22. Mystery Science Theater 3000
I mean, it should be pretty obvious that I love this series, right? If you ever had the misfortune of watching a movie at home with me, you'd know I just do not shut the fuck up and spend a lot of the runtime either pointing out trivia or cracking jokes, and it's mostly because of being inspired by this show. It's also partly because I'm annoying, but that's neither here nor there.
21. Batman: The Animated Series
No fucking duh this is on the list. This is pretty much the definitive portrayal of Batman for a lot of people, one that truly encapsulates everything the character is all about. Kevin Conroy truly owned the titular role, as did his costar Mark Hamill when it came to the Joker, and as if that wasn't enough this is the show that spawned one of my favorite comic characters, Harley Quinn. There's no denying the impact this show has had on Batman as a franchise, but even beyond that it's just a damn good show with really good writing. I sure am glad one of the guys who made it never went and flushed all the good will he garnered from creating this by constantly having Bruce Wayne lust after one of his teenage proteges!
20. Courage the Cowardly Dog
This show is pretty well-regarded for how it showcased some truly weird and fucked up imagery, but I don’t think any of that would be as resonant without the moments of tenderness and heartfelt emotion, the genuinely amusing slapstick, or the often clever writing. When it comes to episodic shows, variety is king, and this show has that in spades.
19. The Grim Adventures of Billy and Mandy
This show seems to be an answer to a question no one asked: What if they made Family Guy for kids? The black comedy, the negative continuity, the numerous pop culture references, the grossout humor, the musical numbers… it probably wasn’t intentional, but it sure adds up. The biggest difference is that this show is way more consistent in quality and has Jeff the spider, making it the superior show by a mile.
18. Digimon Tamers
What do you get when you cross the silly monster battles of Digimon with the writing of the man who brought us Serial Experiments Lain and a heaping helping of Lovecraft? You get this show, of course! It’s darker and more psychological than the goofier seasons before it, and while normally I’d balk at a series shifting tone like this, since this was my first ever Digimon cartoon I watched from start to finish I embraced it with open arms. Hell, this show is probably where my love of psychological and allegorical horror came from. And of course the show gave me yet another childhood crush, and if you’ve read the Rhine City stories I co-author you’ll know exactly which character it was.
17. The Twilight Zone
The brilliance of this anthology series is just the incredibly wide range it has with the supernatural and sci-fi stories. Sometimes you’ll get a resonant and hard-hitting allegory on a social issue, and sometimes you’ll just get a cool, fucked up horror story where some evil little kid can warp reality and holds an entire town hostage to his maniacal whims. I’ve enjoyed every revival they’ve done over the years, but the Rod Serling original just can’t be beat.
16. Stranger Things
I’ll admit that it’s really the first and fourth seasons carrying this show to #16; seasons 2 and 3 are wildly uneven, with 3 in particular veering close to the shark-jumping ramp with its cartoonish Red Scare stereotypes. But even in the show’s weakest moments, the characters and how they interact with each other have managed to keep me invested. How can I be too mad at season 3 when it gave my boy Steve (the best character) a new BFF, Robin (the other best character)?
15. Elfen Lied
I think it’s easy to write this show off as overly gratuitous because, well, it is. Everything here is turned up to 11, from the gore and nudity to the drama and tragedy. I kind of feel the same way about this show as I do for V for Vendetta, where if they cut the crucial tragic backstory it would make the work as problematic as the haters say. But with Lucy’s heartbreaking backstory left intact, it definitely elevates the story into something greater. The manga is still (mostly) better, but I have to give the show credit for introducing it to me, and also cutting out the character who constantly pisses herself.
14. Smiling Friends
Sure, the wacky shitpost humor and the black comedy are great, but can we just stop and marvel at how uncynical the show is? The core concept is a cheerful optimist and a bitter realist work together in a business that helps people be happy, and despite all the hijinks they get into they typically end up succeeding in one way or another. In a world where so many adult animated shows seem to revel in pessimistic nihilism (cough Rick & Morty cough), it’s nice to see a comedy with similar humor but a more optimistic outlook.
13. Ed, Edd n Eddy
This is one of the absolute funniest shows ever, making great use of the cartoon world to pull off the most wacky slapstick you'll ever see. But I think what truly pushes this series this high is the absolutely fantastic sound effects and music it utilizes. Like, holy shit this show is on another level. It all goes a long way towards making up for the living sexual assault joke that is the Kanker sisters.
12. SpongeBob SqaurePants
This show dropped almost nothing but bangers for three seasons, gave us one of the best show-to-film adaptations of all time, generated a near endless supply of memes, and was generally just really fucking funny. And sure, it dipped in quality a bit in its middle seasons, but I think the first three to three four seasons are good enough that they can fuck up as much as they want.
11. Invincible
Gee Amazon, how come you get to have two of the best superhero shows around? Where The Boys is more of a straight deconstruction of superhero tropes, Invincible feels like something of a reconstruction. We still have an evil Superman and morally dubious good guys, but Invincible himself is utterly unyielding in his desire to be good to the point he manages to break down his evil father’s emotional walls and save the world (for the moment) simply by being a loving son. Unwavering goodness even in the face of genuine horror is badass as all hell.
10. Full Metal Alchemist: Brotherhood
Not to be a stereotypical weeb, but this show is simply a masterpiece. Now I will admit, the first half of the show was honestly done way better in the original series, and that one also had some interesting takes on some of the characters once it started diverging from the manga. But this series has a much better finale with way better character moments, with stuff like Envy's final fate hitting harder than anything the original show could muster. There's a reason anime fans suck this show's dick so much; it genuinely is that good.
9. A Series of Unfortunate Events
I’m sure I wasn’t the only one disappointed that the original movie never got a sequel, so my hopes were high going into the Netflix series. Needless to say, I ended up extremely impressed; considering how they managed to incorporate the VFD plotline from the very start instead of throwing it in later in the series, I might even go as far as to call it an improvement on the books. I think the most surprising thing here is that despite expecting NPH as Count Olaf to steal the show, it’s actually Patrick Warburton’s portrayal of Lemony Snicket himself that brings the whole show together.
8. Peacemaker
youtube
I think this one speaks for itself.
7. Futurama
I love all of Matt Groening's shows, from the loose family sitcom shenanigans of The Simpsons to the great overarching plotline of Disenchanted. But it's really not surprising that the middle ground between tightly-plotted continuity and great humor is my favorite of his works. The best part of the show is no matter how many times it ends, it always comes back and finds new ways to bust your gut and tug at your heartstrings.
6. Gravity Falls
Disney has had many great TV shows in their time, but quite frankly nothing compares to this animated supernatural mystery series about a pair of twins having their summer vacation at a shitty scam shack. The episodes are mainly episodic with hints at the bigger lore, and it doesn't really ever feel like it's dragging its feet. It also didn't overstay its welcome, telling a fantastic story over the course of two seasons before gracefully bowing out while on top. Very few shows can say they ended in top form.
5. Jane the Virgin
One fine day I came home from work to find my wife watching this on Netflix. Curious, I sat down and watched it, not expecting much... and then proceeded to become so emotionally invested in the show I spent the rest of the series shouting at the screen as if the characters could hear me. It's sweet, funny, and absolutely ridiculous, a loving tribute to the telenovelas that inspired it, and a blessing unto this world for giving us the gift of Rogelio.
4. Avatar: The Last Airbender
Yeah, real bold and daring of me to say this is probably the best Western animated series ever, but it’s hard to deny that it’s true. With a rich world, excellent characters, and a strong story it’s to the point where the worst episode would be perfectly fine in any other show, and the best episode doesn’t even feature the titular Airbender at all. It’s just that good.
3. Breaking Bad
You know me, I love character studies of awful people, and few fictional villains are as awful as the egotistical meth manufacturer Walter White. Watching his rise and fall, the numerous moments where he goes further beyond the pale than before, is endlessly gripping, and the fantastic cast of characters helps keep things just as good even if we aren’t following Walt. Mike, Jesse, Gus, Skyler, the Salamancas, Hank, Saul… all of them are fantastic in their own right and could easily carry their own show. Speaking of which, about that last guy...
2. Better Call Saul
As much as I think Breaking Bad is objectively the greatest show ever, I prefer Better Call Saul. In hindsight, you can kind of tell Walter was bad from the start, but Jimmy “Saul Goodman” McGill? We watch him go from a morally dubious but ultimately well-intentioned man into the sleazy bastard he was in the original show, and it is genuinely heartbreaking. This show makes you truly dread the moment Jimmy fully becomes Saul, and considering how beloved the funny lawyer man was that is no small feat. The story of a good man falling from grace only to ultimately claw his way back to ultimately reclaim his humanity in the end… it’s beautiful.
1. JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure
I don’t think I could possibly overstate the influence this series has had on me and my writing. The personalized superpowers, the meaningful names, the numerous musical references, the unashamed embracement of even the most ludicrous elements of the stories… If you read the Rhine City stuff you can clearly see where I’ve let the JJBA influence seep in. But even outside the influence, it’s just a damn good action/adventure series, with no part being truly bad (4 - 6 are my favorites, though). It’s never a dull moment watching what sort of insane feats the Joestar family and their allies will pull off against the increasingly deadly forces of evil; here’s hoping we get to see Steel Ball Run sooner than later.
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Quarterly Fic Recs 2021 #2
Hello! I’m back with another rec list! Here are fics I’ve read, loved and thoroughly enjoyed in the second quarter of 2021! They are all very wonderful fics! Each story has its own genre, warnings (and are mostly 18+), so please take that into consideration before reading. If any authors would like me to untag them, please let me know. Enjoy!
Yoongi
before i leave you @hollyhomburg
summary: Yoongi Disappears- leaving behind a shattered pack. 8 months later, Jimin finds Yoongi in an H-mart of all places.
Hoseok
heart-on @junghelioseok
summary: my boss is always telling me how perfect her son would be for me and she promises he’s coming to the next holiday party and don’t worry he’s heard all about me too and ALSO there’s this dude i slept with once a couple of months ago and sometimes he still sends me dick pics when i ask him to at 3 in the morning cause seriously dude’s got a good dick
Jungkook
charmolypi @njssi
summary: Work and pleasure should never be combined — or so the saying goes. But you were never really one to follow the rules in their entirety and neither were the ones around you. Love, lust, interest. Five people. In the workplace. What could go wrong? Everyone just wants to get something, after all.
when you least expect it @johobi
summary: You’re in love with your childhood friend, Taehyung. The problem is, you treasure your friendship with him far too much to ever risk losing it. Oh, and he’s quite the Casanova. At your wits’ end with feelings you can no longer hide as diligently as you once did, you ask him to set you up with someone, anyone, in a last ditch attempt to avoid a heartbreaking conversation.
wherever there is you @jeonstudios
summary: you’ve been drinking, haven’t you?
instant gratification @dovechim
fuckboi@jungkook x cheerleader!reader
haze @yyooni
summary: So you’ve fucked the biggest fuck boy on campus. It’s a one and done. One night stand. A wham bam thank you ma’am. So why does it happen again?
OT7/Multiple Members
because i’m yours @minniepetals
summary: you should have known they’d never let you go after gathering the courage to ask for a kiss
blazed @ironicarmy
summary: Your friends try to cheer you up during Christmastime, but things go south once Hoseok appears with a mysterious brown bag.
Seokjin
one step @cutechim
summary: attending an ex’s wedding is never easy, but you might just have the perfect remedy—if you can pluck up the courage to take it.
platonic @joheunsaram
summary: Finding a new method for stress relief, you rope in your bestfriend/fwb to try it out with you.
show me yours and i’ll show you mine @ktheist
summary: you’re a horny bunny yet kim seokjin always seems to manage to slide out of your grasps like a fox every time.
Yoongi
before i leave you pt. 7 @/hollyhomburg
summary: Pack omega kim Seokjin knows how to handle things when they go south (or alternatively you get triggered, Yoongi has a panic attack, and it’s a good thing the pack is there to help)
Hoseok
risky business @yoonjinkooked
summary: The person who invented smart glass office walls knew what they were doing. Your secretary fucks you stupid in the office.
snapshot @xjoonchildx
summary: after a day at the beach, hoseok has some surprises in store for his longtime love
keep me warm @ppersonna
summary: camping is always a great time when you’re with your friends, but even better with your boyfriend, hoseok.
it’s you @jinpanman
summary: An accidental confession throws your years-long friendship with Hoseok into disarray.
Namjoon
love bytes @stutterfly
summary: It’s been a year since you first met Kim Namjoon, the passionate, talented English professor at the local campus. He’s always been clumsy and aloof, but he’s on a whole new level in terms of “technologically incapable.” One call to IT was all it took to pull you into his life, and with it a whole string of friendships full of flirtatious banter and undying support.
Your dating situation has been drier than the Sahara for years now, and you’ve wasted too many lonely nights drinking alone, so you try your hand at Tinder. But you’re not getting any bites. When the group finds out, they are more than willing to help–even Namjoon, though he finds it increasingly difficult to deny that he’s hopelessly smitten. You consider their opinions on potential Tinder dates while fighting off feelings you never knew were brewing for the caring soul who becomes the home you never had.
out of my league @/ppersona
summary: Kim Namjoon was never supposed to find out about your years-long hopeless crush on him. And he most definitely was not supposed to find out about it in front of all your coworkers in a company-wide meeting.
so this is love @jinpanman
summary: “So this is the miracle that I’ve been dreaming of. So this is love.”
problem solved @sugasbabiie
summary: Namjoon helps you with more than math problems tonight.
love is @hxseok-honee
summary: they say that love is supposed to transcend time and space and that it knows no limits. but putting an ocean and thousands of miles between two people won’t make things any easier, will it?
Jimin
potent pink @dntaewithluv
summary: The first time you see Park Jimin you’re instantly entranced by him. And it turns out he lives in the apartment next to the one you’re moving into, so even better he’s your hot neighbor. When the previous tenant confesses to you that he was the best hook up she ever had, you’re that much more intrigued. The first time you meet him, however, you’re deciding immediately that you hate him and want to stay as far away from him as possible. Jimin is determined to be a constant in your life though, and he definitely is that. Both a constant flirt and a constant pain in your ass. Is a ruined second impression enough to prevent you from ever giving him a second chance?
Taehyung
hush, yeah? @kithtaehyung
summary: the innocent accident that started it all
unfinished business @/dntaewithluv
summary: Besides wanting to catch up with some old friends, there’s only one reason you found yourself agreeing to attend your 10 year high school reunion. The boy you were in love with back then is going to be there, and you’re determined to finally make your move. Except, unfortunately, it turns out that Kim Seokjin is very much happily married. Kim Taehyung, however, is very much single and feels like he has something to prove to you after you turned him down all those years ago. One night is all it takes to make you realize you made the biggest mistake of your life.
under the covers @jessikahathaway
spy!au
darling @bloomsuga
summary: “go to sleep, darling.”
as endless as the stars ^
summary: he waited 160 years to meet you again, and now that he has, he’s not letting go. or: “i love you as deep as the ocean and as endless as the stars”
dirty dishes @jaysdimples
summary: when your boyfriend can’t seem to keep his hands to himself so he stirs up a little trouble in the kitchen while everyone else is a few feet away in the next room
devotion @/sweetbunnykook
summary: You and Taehyung were inseparable once. When you come back to your hometown after three years, fate pulls you back to him. And this time, Taehyung won’t ever keep his eyes off of you.
Jungkook
commercial break; twelve @1kook
summary: Anyway, if it was up to Jungkook, Kim Doyeon would not be a member of the Engagement Ring Committee.
tease @adonis-koo
summary:You came with the intentions of your best friend landing a job as a stripper. You never meant to catch the eyes of the king stripper of the establishment- Jeon Jungkook, yourself. With what was supposed to be a harmless way of paying off college debt faster you find yourself falling into a very odd and passionate relationship with your new mentor. Between infidelity, passion and jealousy there’s never a dull moment at Cherry Bomb.
jock!jk @angelguk
summary: going raw with jock jk
evolution of a lover’s heart @jeonstudios
summary: the rules are simple: first one to take the virginity wins.
euphoria @btssavedmylifeblr
summary: At the end of your life, you are given one day to live again with the man you loved. A lifetime’s love story told in a single day.
idealizations concerning real life relations @venusiangguk
summary: jungkook loves to be loved, but he doesn’t love in return.
relax @itsbuffsanta
summary: jk is antsy after the concert, so you help him relax.
employee of the month @/dntaewithluv
summary: Sometimes it truly amazes you how much of an idiot your boyfriend can be. But you also find it impossible to say no to him. Even when it involves letting him fuck you at his work on the same day that he gets awarded employee of the month…
ego 08 @suga-kookiemonster
summary: what’s a girl to do when her sweet, innocent baby lab partner isn’t quite so sweet and innocent? well, he’s a grown-ass man, and you’re about to learn that the hard way.
only you 10 @sweetbunnykook
summary: Jeon Jungkook, your wedding photographer, helps you escape on your big day upon learning about a secret your groom-to-be kept hidden. You soon fall for this young, passionate photographer. However, you underestimated just how much he was willing to reciprocate that love. Maybe, you think, he’s loving you just a little too much.
lunchbox lovers @jiminrings
stem major!koo x cold senior!y/n
crunchyroll & rail @/1kook
summary: Never mind the fact you really like Sailor Moon, or that you really want to pay attention to every little detail; the moment becomes Jungkook and his big smile and his red cheeks and the tiny box he produces from within his pocket.
only for you @jikookiekosmos
summary: It’s the night before your wedding and you should be happy…but a fight with your fiancé leaves you second guessing everything. A visit from the blue-haired boy of your dreams is just what you need to make it right.
lillies @dewykth
summary: “… white lines, pretty baby, tattoos, don’t know what they mean, they’re special just for you…”
bluekooberry @kimtaehyunq
summary: Your adoring boyfriend, Jungkook, surprises you with a brand new hairstyle before your trip to visit him for the weekend. He’s excited to see you, feed you, and give you exactly what you want.
bad reputation @noteguk
summary: in which you have to deal with some strange emotions for the first time.
not yet @bratkook
summary: jungkook feels the pang of guilt in his gut when you spot your recent ex out with his new girl, and what better way to make the jerk hurt than to have him believe you were now dating him, the neighbor he had been insecure about your whole relationship
incoming: elite chatboy @kookingtae
summary: welcome to Elite Chatroom, a sex chat company with a wide variety of services such as text messaging, phone call, and video chat. you signed up online for the most basic text service plan not knowing what to expect, but you certainly didn’t think you’d end up actually liking the man behind the screen.
ineffable @euphoria-vmin7
summary: your best friend Jeon Jeongguk has always been amazing and deserved the best, so you’ve hid your love for him. But unbeknowsnt to you, there may be feelings that could change everything between you two…
touch @gardentulips
summary: when you tease and please one another
Multiple Members
friendly fire @kpopfanfictrash
summary: The dynamic: Hoseok; your friend and previous fuck buddy. Jungkook; Hoseok’s roommate and subject of your massive crush. The scene: determined not to drunk-gush about your crush any more (to his face), you decide to seclude yourself from all campus parties. Until, of course, Hoseok guilts you into a favor. Things spiral from there.
the boys are back in town @/dntaewithluv
summary: Getting stood up by your date definitely hadn’t been on your agenda for the evening. Also definitely not on your agenda: bumping into Park Jimin and Jeon Jungkook. Together. On the same exact night. It’s been a while since you’ve seen your two best friends, as well as lovers on multiple occasions, from your high school and college days. A chance meeting, some drinks, and a trip down memory lane is all it takes to reignite the attraction between the three of you. Old habits die hard, but these two? They just might be the death of you.
ruin you @taegularities
summary: “His eyes hold unfathomable darkness that lures you in, captures your very soul, steals any air you are trying to draw. And you know without a doubt that you’re on the path to utter and irrevocable ruination.”
ruin you (once more) ^
summary: Taehyung and Jungkook can’t keep their hands off you. Not even in the elevator.
Seokjin
kairos @luffles424
summary: When your financial aid falls through for your last year of school, you fear you’ll have to drop out and postpone your degree. Until Taehyung gives you a suggestion to make a lot of money, quick. His idea can’t possibly end well, can it?
appetence @luffles424
summary: appetence (n.) - an eager desire, an instinctive inclination; an attraction or a natural bondIt’s time for Seokjin’s rut. Are either of you prepared for this step?
tiny lights, tiny lies @ggukcangetit
summary: you aren’t sure when exactly your best friend’s brother went from being an oddly annoying set of broad shoulders to the shoulders you frequently fell asleep against.
Yoongi
the little things @kimtaehyunq
summary: When the present isn’t exactly enough for you right now, Yoongi is here for you through it all. He makes sure you know you aren’t alone and that it’s ok to feel alone.
cyberslut @kimnjss
summary: he has no idea who you are… up front, you’re sweet and innocent - but in reality you’re the exact opposite. running your own nsfw account, where your favorite topic is his hands.
yoongi drabble @joonsgalore
life guard au
Hoseok
benefits @cutechim
summary: you and hoseok have taken the ‘friends’ out of friends with benefits, but exclusivity has its own perks.
Namjoon
namjoon drabble @lovetrivia
summary: You’re a hot girl on Twitch and Namjoon is an absolute simp.
Jimin
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summary: Jimin wants another baby, and much to your delight, he’s determined to give you one.
jimin drabble @/1kook
best friend au
small hands jimin drabble @lavishedinjimin
established relationship au
silk and lace @sunshyngal
summary: Min Nara is the newly dumped fiance to the Crown prince of Korea, Park Jimin. She’s not overtly upset , because at least now she can live her life without the pressure of the monarchy hanging over her head. Besides , Nara has a very dirty little secret. While she spends the day as the perfect high society girl with an impeccable pedigree , her nights are filled with lacy lingerie and webcams. Ignored by the man she’s meant to marry, she revels in the greedy lust of strangers on the internet. It’s her way of saying ‘fuck you’ to a system that sees her as nothing but a toy, molded for the future King. Park Jimin doesn’t know the first thing about his supposed fiancee. And he has no intention of learning either. He knows just what debutante girls are like and he has no patience for the kind. Besides, his girlfriend of three years, the elegant and independent Irene is everything he would ever want in a wife . Or is she?Because in the secrecy of his office , after the day’s work is done , Park Jimin has a very scintillating vice that he likes to indulge in : the beautiful camgirl who calls herself the Temptress. Jimin can’t get enough of the girl’s lush thighs wrapped in silk, the pretty pink of her nipples in see through bralettes and the glittering temptation of the jeweled plugs she likes to stuff herself full with.Jimin thinks she embodies everything he can never allow himself to have as a Prince : filth, sin and decadence , all wrapped up in Silk and Lace.
Taehyung
nip it in the bud @opaljm
summary: You’re not sure how you ended up here, but maybe a shitty ex and a horrible breakup had a hand in what placed you in front of the tattoo parlor. It was already a nerve-wracking experience, but what you never expected was seeing that the owner and artist giving you nipple piercings was your older brother’s best friend you hadn’t seen in ages. to make things even worse, he got fucking hotter.
taehyung drabble @joonsgalore
sugar daddy au
peanut @jungxk
summary: the making of peanut.
Jungkook
pretty kitty @venusiangguk
summary: you’re jk’s baby, his toy, and now his pretty little pet.
heavy metal @hisunshiine
summary: You come home from a trip to find your fuckbuddy has a… hole-y surprise.
devour @bloomsuga
summary: my sweet angel… i am going to devour you
grain of sand @jungkookiebus
summary: Blind since the age of 18 from a genetic disorder, Jungkook walked through life as if he never lost it, but on one fateful day seven years ago he literally almost runs into you. He fell in love nearly immediately. Fast forward to the present and it’s just another day in your quiet life with him by your side.
under the oak tree @mingoyeob
summary: as the eldest daughter of a duke, it’s your duty to marry at your father’s will. yet you didn’t expect to be marrying jeon jungkook, a knight of low status, especially when he departs for an expedition without another word after your first night. when he comes back three years later, this time as a renowned hero, how will you be able to face him and how will things change between you and your new husband?
jungkook drabble @1kook
dilf!jk
commercial break: thirteen ^
summary: Because for as much shit as you let him get away with, Jungkook is certain you’ll draw the line today.
sh. @wwilloww
summary: How could you say no to a month away in the mountains with your friends after six months of grueling quarantine?
jungkook drabble @lavishedinjimin
daddy!jk
OT7/Multiple Members
the end @jimlingss
summary: It’s been a habit of yours to vent in the form of love letters. There’s six in total. They’re kept secret, hidden in your closet. But on your 30th birthday, what you least expect is for each letter to become reality. All done by the whacky ghost of Christmas future trying to grant your birthday wish.
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@flakmaniak
Timmy Turner and Finn aren’t from ensemble casts though, right? I mean, there are recurring other characters, but they’re The Main Character, with one or two nonhuman sidekicks along for the ride.
Well, yes, but that’s kind of my point, actually.
Maybe I’ll just try writing out that essay...
Early on in the run of My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, series creator Lauren Faust wrote out a short article for Ms. Magazine laying out her goals and intentions for the show. I think it’s a very interesting article, so much that I kind of want to quote the whole thing, but one thing Faust said that really stuck with me was,
There are lots of different ways to be a girl. You can be sweet and shy, or bold and physical. You can be silly and friendly, or reserved and studious. You can be strong and hard working, or artistic and beautiful.
I think the show is quite successful at that, depicting many different kinds of people, er, pastel ponies, with different strengths, weaknesses, and interests without denigrating any of them.
Faust also talks about being mostly completely alienated by the girls shows of her youth, which is interesting to me because I was extremely into at least a couple of girls shows. As a little boy, I was obsessed with the My Little Pony cartoon, and then, later, Sailor Moon.
Around the late 70s and early 80s, kids shows in the US kind of bifurcated, with shows becoming very explicitly “for girls” and “for boys”. This was especially true during the 80s, and this division wasn’t just about whether you had angular, primary color robots or soft pastel horses, the characters and story structures were very different as well.
I liked the boys shows, but I also liked some of the girls shows, because they addressed feelings and ideas I had that just weren’t going to be addressed in the boys shows. I especially liked the original My Little Pony series.
Now, the 80s version of My Little Pony has a lot of flaws. Particularly, the animation is terrible even by the standards of the 80s and the voice acting can be grating. But rewatching it, I still see what I liked as a kid, which was that it paid a lot of attention to motives and feelings. Like, here are some of the motivations for villains in the show:
I remember when my villainous boss used to be nice, so maybe if I stay with her I can keep her from causing too much trouble and help her go back to how she was.
I was kidnapped by a weird monster and he’s threatened to hurt my loved ones if I don’t do his evil bidding.
I made a deal for fame and fortune with a genie and now I know he eats souls but I’m afraid if I reject him I’ll go back to being poor.\
Our Queen stole a magic rock to revitalize our frozen country, and even though she’s overbearing I have to do right by my country.
These are fairly complex motivations for a kids show, especially when you compare them to, say, Transformers or Ninja Turtles. Shredder or Megatron are just bad because they’re bad, and so are most of their minions. Even if you have somebody like, I don’t know, Jetfire, the story there is that he discovers that his old friend Starscream is bad, at which point neither character has any further compunctions about blasting his old friend with laser guns.
Meanwhile, villains in My Little Pony would be conflicted, have divided loyalties, and be genuinely unsure what the right thing to do was. Even as a very small child, I thought that was more interesting and more honest then other shows were being.
Later, I had many of the same feelings about Sailor Moon. Hell, I still do. Even in the bowdlerized American version, I could still relate to Ami wondering if being a nerd meant she wasn’t properly into the things girls are “supposed” to be into and Usagi’s complete loathing of schoolwork and studies.
Even though these shows weren’t “for” me I really loved them, because the shows that were “for” me, the boys shows, never really expressed the kinds of ideas I’m talking about here. Like, especially during the early nineties, the answer to the question, “Does being a quiet, studious nerd make me less of a boy?” was, “Yes.”
I actually remember, as a child, constantly wishing I had been born a girl, not because I had some inner girl nature, but because girls (or so it seemed from outside) were allowed to be quiet, to be studious, to talk about feelings and to like predictability and calm. The idea of a boy wanting those things was largely foreign.
So... put a pin in that.
Okay, I want to describe a young boy to you.
He’s energetic, but a bit scatterbrained. He isn’t bookish at all; trying to sit still for long periods of time makes him antsy, and he’d rather be out in the world doing physical things than reading or thinking. In fact, he tends to act without thinking things through, and this gets him in trouble.
Despite being energetic and physical, he isn’t really into sports; he chafes under authority so teamwork isn’t always his strong suit, even though he cares deeply about his friends.
I would argue that I’ve just described pretty much every adolsecent male protagonist of every cartoon released over the last 15 years or so. Aang. Danny Phantom. Timmy Turner. Ben 10. Finn from Adventure Time. I’m sure more will come to mind later.
This character shows up again and again in boys cartoons, and he’s almost always depicted as the default, with other characters understood through their relationship to this default boy.
Okay, I’m going to get into representation politics, and specifically I’m about to criticize Adventure Time, so I think a disclaimer is in order. One of the problems with talking about representation is that you end up criticizing broad patterns, but the same people aren’t in charge of the whole media landscape, and any single instance of the pattern is probably actually extremely defensible.
So. Okay. I haven’t seen all of Adventure Time, but I’ve seen the first couple of seasons, and they are very well written, and I think Finn in particular is a very well observed character who is very true to life, and in order to change what I’m going to complain about you’d have to rework the show from the ground up. So it’s not that this is a terrible decision, but...
Okay, something that bothers me about early Adventure Time is that Princess Bubblegum is a science nerd only because Finn isn’t. Princess Bubblegum kind of represents, to Finn, the mysteries of adulthood and sexuality. She’s part of this mysterious world of women and adulthood that Finn longs for but hasn’t grown up enough, or had enough experience with, to really understand.
And so to hammer that home her personality and life are also full of things that Finn can’t understand... Like sitting still, and doing meticulous, complex experiments and researching in books.
It’s not that the show denigrates this, not at all, it’s just that it’s positioned as incomprehensible and distant from the audience stand-in character. The Boy doesn’t like to sit still and study, he likes to go on dangerous, physical adventures! And he certainly couldn’t ever prefer to sit still and study over going out and having a physical adventure. Doing that would be incomprehensible.
She’s well-written and I’m sure lots of kids relate to her, but fundamentally her nerdiness is portrayed as foreignness.
A lot of the shows I mentioned above aren’t even really ensembles, but those that kind of are, e.g. Avatar: The Last Airbender, or Ben 10 give The Boy special powers that differentiate him from the rest of the cast.
Go back to the early episodes of My Little Pony and Twilight Sparkle is kind of the viewpoint character; the framing device of the early episodes is letters she writes, but she doesn’t really have, like, one special power that the others don’t, and structurally she’s a tertiary character in a lot of episodes.
Contrast that to Aang, who is central to the story of Avatar, the Last Airbender. Like... you can have episodes that aren’t really about him but he has a special, important power that no other character does or can have, and the fate of the whole plot rests on his shoulders. Like, if the Avatar dies the natural order is upended and the Fire Nation almost certainly wins; you could kill off any other supporting cast member and then replace them without completely upending the world.
This is not to say that any of the shows I have called out are bad or harmful, but, to go way back, I remember being genuinely upset as a child not to see boy characters who had the feelings and struggles I did, and if anything, I think the situation might be slightly worse than when I was a kid. Go back to that Lauren Faust quote up there. How many cartoons feature a boy who is “Reserved and Studious”? Dexter’s Lab... Maybe Invader Zim... How many with a boy that is “Sweet and Shy”? Have you ever seen one about a boy who is “Artistic and beautiful?”
What about a show with all those boys portrayed as friends and equals, rather than one for you to relate to and a bunch of sidekicks and side characters?
Like, one of the only male, American cartoon characters who has ever made me go, “Yeah, that’s what it was like for me as a kid” is fucking Butters from South Park.
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