#which is. already super fucking draining. but sure whatever pays my bills I guess
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Accidentally On Purpose
Summary: They shared one incredible night together five months ago, and after she disappeared from his life without a trace, except for the intoxicating scent on her pillow, he never thought he'd see her again.
That is until his colleague, David, sets him up on a blind date with his sister.
When fate brings them together again, she's full of surprises. Two to be exact.
A/N: This is something I've been working on, but I have no idea what inspired me to write this, it's just a concept I've been wanting to write that popped into my head quite randomly. This will most likely be a 2 or 3 parter, depending on the muse. She holds the reins here, I just do what she tells me to do lol.
Thank you @onceuponaprincessworld for looking it over and for your feedback!!!
Catch up: pt 1
Also on: Ao3 I FF.N
Rated: M
Part 2
The sound of her name yanks Emma abruptly from her thoughts, and she shudders at the way the British accent slides through her like smooth silk. “That’s me,” she replies and scoots off the stool, grabbing her things. He sounds familiar; she would never forget a voice or an accent like that, but she can't seem to place the voice with a face. Until she turns around and sees who her date is.
Fuck.
Emma’s jaw slackens, her face drains of color and cold sweat beads across her forehead.
“You’re Emma?”
Unable to form words at the moment, she manages a nod.
“I’m Killian.”
Holy mother of—
“You’re Killian?” she asks dumbly, unwilling to believe it. But she knows very well it’s him. She’d never forget that face. That messy, black hair. Those impossibly blue eyes. Those lips. God, those lips were so firm and demanding and loving when he kissed every inch of her body. And the tongue she can detect as his mouth hangs open. That wicked, yet exquisitely soft tongue worked miracles on her.
He nods. “Well… this is awkward,” he chuckles lightly, scratching behind his ear.
He has no idea exactly how awkward it is. He hasn’t put together the pieces yet.
She scoffs. “Yeah, considering I'm much fatter than I was when we first saw each other.”
“You're not fat, you're carrying twins.” He offers her a rose and a smile. “You look stunning.”
Her cheeks flush and her heart flutters as she takes the rose, bringing it to her nose to draw in its scent. While the gesture is very sweet, it makes her realize she can't do this, just like she couldn't do this the last time when she woke up next to him.
She wants to take off running, something she's very good at, except for when she's pregnant. So even if she could move her feet, which now feel they've been super-glued to the floor, she wouldn't be able to run, at least not fast enough to outrun him if he chased her after her.
The maitre d’ gives them a moment of reprieve when she leads them to a table. A cozy, secluded table in the far corner of the restaurant. Falling behind Killian, Emma’s eyes shit to the emergency exit which isn’t very far from where she is. She could sneak over and dash through the door before Killian knows she’s gone, not without setting off the alarm though. But did she really want to risk missing an opportunity here? The father of her unborn children is directly in front of her. This is her chance to rectify the situation. Question is, did she really want to?
Placing a hand on her belly, she proceeds to the table. Things are different now. Every decision she makes affects her little ducklings, so she has to think about them and how her choices will ultimately affect them.
Yes, she’s doing this for them.
Killian pulls out a chair for her, and she sits down, thanking him with a faint smile. He claims the seat across from her as the maitre d’ leaves the table.
Part of her is hoping he won’t put the pieces together, because while she’s thinking of her children, she also has to think of him and how the truth might completely change and possibly ruin his life. And at least now, she’ll be able to tell her children their father’s name.
Ugh, she is so conflicted and confused.
~*~
Killian's not sure what to think when he discovers David’s sister is the same woman who ran out of the motel room and out of his life. The woman who left him with an empty side of the bed, her scent on the pillow, an empty feeling in his heart and fond memories of the previous night.
He hasn’t been able to stop thinking about that night, how good her legs felt wrapped around his waist, how good she tasted—her soft mouth when he kissed her, her lovely skin and warm nectar bursting on his tongue when he licked between her thighs. Even before they left for the motel, he couldn’t remember the last time he had so much fun. Probably never.
David was right; she’s definitely a feisty lass. Their banter and teasing jabs drew him in even more, but her laugh… God, her laugh was so enchanting he wanted to spend his entire life making her laugh just to hear that wonderful sound tumble from her lips over and over again. She's also beautiful and intoxicating, and her skin was so warm and silky that night as he brushed his knuckles over her cheek. She was so responsive to his touch. His mouth went dry, and he wanted to make her laugh again, he wanted to make her fall apart in his arms.
He rarely picked up women at the bar, nor did he hook up with women he barely knew in a motel room, but he was incredibly attracted to her the second she walked into the establishment. She was the most beautiful woman he’d ever laid eyes on, still is, and she appeared to be alone, so the decision to buy her a drink was an easy one. He sent it her way, and the rest was history.
Later on, he asked her if she wanted to get out of there. But he wouldn’t have been brave enough to ask if he hadn’t witnessed the want in her eyes, the way she flirted with him, if he hadn’t felt the way her warm palm found his thigh underneath the table, the way she stroked him so close to where he was already very excited and very hard. He’d never left a table so quickly when she agreed to meet him at a nearby motel. She had to use the ladies' room to freshen up or whatever lasses usually did in the restroom. Reckoning she’d be too stubborn to let him pay for the entire bill himself, he took the opportunity to leave for the motel to reserve a room while she was in the restroom.
He returned to the bar to walk her to the motel in the dark, and sure enough, she tried to reimburse him for half, but he refused. He invited her, so he could not in good conscience allow her to give him anything for the room. Well, she would give him something, just nothing of monetary value. She gave him many things that night; she gave herself to him; she gave him the best several orgasms he’s ever experienced, with her hand, her mouth and her very warm and very tight cunt wrapped gloriously around his cock. She gave him a night of passion and ecstasy; she gave him a night to remember.
They could barely contain themselves as they walked to the room. As soon as they were behind closed doors, their lips connected, they tore off each other's clothes and made love with raging-hot hunger, moans, heavy breaths mingling and filthy words filling the room. She buried her fingers in his hair as he buried himself inside her , and she tugged on his hair every time he filled her to the hilt. They were too far gone to savor and taste each other thoroughly the first time.
So once he caught his breath, once his desire and sweat had cooled, only slightly, he traced and kissed every dip and curve of her body with curiosity and fascination, worshipping her properly as she explored him with greedy fingers. When he settled between her thighs, parting them for easy access to her entrance, she reached for him, fisting locks of his hair as he licked up the sweet evidence of what he had done to her. What they had done to each other. They went three rounds before their bodies collapsed, before they were completely sapped, and sleep seeped into his bones as her head rested on his chest. She was so sexy, demanding and irresistible and they’d thoroughly worn each other out. When he woke the next morning, he'd been looking forward to a fourth round with the gorgeous blonde goddess who'd shifted his world off its axis in merely a night, so when he reached out for her, he was incredibly disappointed to find her gone.
Needless to say, it was an incredible night. In fact, it was probably the best night of his entire life.
Unfortunately, Emma doesn’t appear to feel the same. She doesn't seem too happy to see him. He guesses she might be a tad embarrassed because she ran out on him after that night. She could leave right now if she wanted to, but she’s not, so perhaps it’s a good sign. Or perhaps she’s only being polite.
She looks afraid for some reason as she peruses the menu, like she’d seen a ghost. Not afraid of him, but afraid of something. She’s biting her bottom lip as if she’s warring with herself about something. She did the same thing when he asked her to leave with him that night. Does she feel guilty about going on a date while she’s pregnant? Single mothers have needs too, so she shouldn’t feel bad or guilty. Just like she shouldn’t feel bad or guilty about the night they shared five months ago.
Five terrible months. Five months.
A thought suddenly slams into his brain, and his mouth goes dry. They were together five months ago. And Emma's five months pregnant.
Could he be…
His face pales and his throat closes up.
No, it’s not possible, is it?
Emma looks up, seeing the awestruck expression on his face. She senses he’s putting the pieces together.
Oh.
He is the father. That’s why she’s so conflicted. Isn’t it?
“So, uh…” he stumbles for words as he scratches behind his ear. “Do you… do you know who the…”
“Who the father is?”
“Aye.”
~*~
Emma’s not sure what to tell him. Should she tell him the truth? She takes a deep breath and sets down the menu, placing her hands in her lap as her eyes bore into his. She could, but she wants to gauge how he’ll react before she even decides whether to tell him or not. “No, you’re not.”
She thinks he’ll be relieved, but wait… is he disappointed? She can see the disappointment flicker in his eyes.
Fuck.
Now he probably thinks she's a slut who sleeps with random strangers all the time. Why can’t she just tell him? Why can’t she just break through the walls of fear preventing her from telling him? A big part of her wants to, but another part of her doesn't want to ruin tonight. Because once she tells him, the rest of the night will be weird and awkward and she’s not sure it’s the best time.
The best time?
She can just hear Mary Margaret screaming at her right now.
He’s the father of your children, Emma! Grow some balls and tell the man!
Or would her sister-in-law tell her to wait until the end of the night, until after she’s released some stress. But that would be so wrong—to get her fix first and then drop a huge, atomic bomb on him.
“So, um… can I ask what happened to the father?” he asks, scratching behind his ear again. “I was just curious… any man would be a fool to walk away from a woman like you and those babies.”
Emma’s cheeks warm as she gives him a weak smile.
Well shit.
“I just… um, I’d rather not talk about it,” Emma says firmly.
“As you wish, love.”
So they don’t discuss it. The server arrives to take their orders, and Emma thinks of other things to talk about, like the weather or their jobs, or anything else to avoid telling him he’s the father.
“Can I ask you something else, Emma?”
Crap.
She can tell by the tone in his voice and the look on his face, she’s not going to like his question.
But still, she nods and takes another sip of water.
“Do you not want to do this?”
The question takes her off guard a little. She sets down her glass, seeing the insecurities flashing in his eyes. He’s afraid she'll run again. “Do what?”
He gestures between them. “ This. Do you regret showing up, since it turns out I’m your date?”
“I… um,” she gulps, fumbling for the right words to say. She reaches over and takes his hands in hers. “Look, Killian… it’s not that I didn't enjoy our night together, because I did.” A small smile curves her lips. “In fact, I enjoyed it so much, I got scared. I was afraid if I stayed, I’d end up falling for you. I was afraid I’d end up getting my heart broken because it’s happened before. I’m kind of damaged goods.”
“Thanks for your honesty, Emma,” he says appreciatively as he pulls his hands away, “but you didn’t answer my question. Do you regret agreeing to this blind date?”
She shakes her head. “No, I don’t. Do you?”
He has a stoic expression on his face. “Aye.”
Emma’s heart drops. She feels like she's just been drop-kicked in the stomach. “Oh.”
He holds up his hand, his Adam's Apple bobbing as he speaks. “I spent the last five months wondering if I’d ever see you again, I spent five months thinking about the night we shared, I dreamed about you constantly, I wondered if we’d ever run into each other again or what I'd say to you if we did. I barely know you and yet you turned my entire world upside down. And now that you’re right in front of me, you’re… you’re pregnant with another man’s children and you…” his voice cracks, “you agreed to this date thinking you'd be going out with a man who wasn't me. You were willing to go to a restaurant, have a pleasant conversation over dinner with the possibility of something more, even though you’re five months pregnant. You were willing to endure something uncomfortable, something a bit awkward just so you could engage in more enjoyable activities later on.”
What the fuck?
Killian doesn't appear to be happy; his jaw tightens as he pulls out some cash from his wallet and throws it on the table. “You were able to endure all of this for some man you never met before, someone your sister-in-law and brother set you up with, and yet you weren't willing to endure an awkward morning-after with a man who already showed you, what I thought was a very good time. You didn't have the decency to at least wake me up with a kiss and say goodbye before you left.”
Oh wow, he really is pissed.
Killian stands up, tucking his wallet inside of his jacket pocket. “You were afraid of getting hurt, and yet you hurt me after only one night of being with me.” The look he regards her with makes her shiver. It makes her heart crack. “So yes, I regret going on a date with someone who wouldn't bother to stick around for even one morning after they had their fill.”
Emma never expected this, she never expected he would be the one to up and leave. As she watches him go in heated silence, she realizes she’s once again losing the opportunity to have this man be in her life. In her children’s lives. She’s letting him slip away from her fingers once again.
No, not this time.
~*~
Killian can't believe this. The amount of pain he feels is indescribable. Unbearable. Sure, he knew what he was signing up for when he took her—a woman whose name he didn’t know—to a motel room. He asked for her name but she responded by asking him, what fun would that be? He went along by saying they were just two ships passing in the night. So he wasn't stupid or naive, but still… he never thought she'd leave him high and dry the second she woke, nor did he think it would be so easy for her to move on with her life like he was nothing but a good lay. That's all he was to her. A good lay.
His blood bubbles as the reality of it all sinks in, and he can't breathe. His heart fucking hurts, and he can’t make it stop, as much as he wants it to. Reaching his car, he hauls the door open, desperate to leave and go home so he can drown his sorrows in a bottle of rum.
“Killian, wait!”
He freezes, his hand clenched around the door, his jaw tightening as he hears her heels click across the pavement.
He stands there, waiting for her to approach him, debating whether to leave. Whether to listen to what she has to say or try to forget about her.
Like that could ever happen.
“Killian,” she wheezes, out of breath when she reaches him. “You’re right, I’m an asshole, I should've stayed. I should’ve given us a chance, but I didn’t. And I can't take that back, all I can do is not let go of that opportunity again. All I can do is tell you the truth and make things right.”
“The truth about what?” he demands, turning around to face her.
Emma peers down as she fidgets with her fingers. “So um, what I’m about to tell you is um… well, I don’t want you to think I’m expecting anything from you at all, I just…” She looks up at him, and his breath catches when her stunning green eyes connect with his blue ones. “I want to make that perfectly clear.”
I'm the father, aren't I?
Killian’s heart feels like it’s about to explode. He's the father of the babies growing inside her. And suddenly the anger inside him turns into something else. Knowing he might be the father of these twins makes him hopeful.
Wait. Twins.
Reality slams into him, turning his face pale. “So um… I’m the…” he swallows the large lump in his throat.
She reaches for him, sensing his anxiety, and takes his hands in hers. “Yes, you’re the father, but as I said, I don’t expect anything from you. That’s why I didn't tell you at first. I didn't want to bombard you with any obligations. I didn’t want to wreck your life.”
“Right…” he murmurs, trying to process this as he releases her hands. “I’m sorry, I just need a minute to myself. I promise not to run away this time.”
She nods in understanding. “Take all the time you need.”
She heads back inside, leaving him at a loss for what to do. It was different when she told him he wasn’t the father, but now that he knows he is, he can't turn his back on her and the twins.
Bloody hell.
He’s a father. To twins.
Killian’s head is spinning as he drags his hands through his hair, sucking in the fresh air through his nostrils. She said she expected nothing from him, but he’s not about to abandon her or the babies. Those are his babies too. And he’s not about to let her raise them by herself with a monthly child support check as his only contribution. No, he can’t do that. He doesn’t even know Emma, but they can change that. If the night he met her was any indication, despite the fact she left him, then they could make this work. The chemistry was there, the attraction, the connection. And it wasn’t just physical. They had some great conversations and good laughs. Maybe he can give this a shot, maybe they can make this work. Or at least try. If things end up not working out between them, he can at least share custody with the twins, right? He has to let her know she’s not alone in this. No matter what happens between them.
Killian takes another deep breath, drawing in the courage to face her again before heading inside.
~*~
Emma’s not sure what to think. Did he leave, or is he considering what she told him? She doesn’t blame him either way. She’s had time to process this, she’s had a little over four months to figure out what to do, what steps to take.
When she saw the two pink lines, she was in tears. How in the world was she going to raise a baby? She was living in her brother's guestroom for crying out loud. And she was always chasing her next mark. But there was no way she was giving up her baby. Being a foster kid and bouncing around from one home to another until David’s family finally adopted her, she wasn’t about to put her baby through that. Then she found out she was having twins and even though it completely flipped her world upside down, she wasn’t about to change her mind. She was doing this, father or not; she would raise these babies and give them the love and home they needed, even if she had to do it at her brother’s place.
She didn’t want David and Mary Margaret to feel obligated to help her raise the twins, but they’d assured her they didn’t mind. They knew how to raise a child, and they weren’t about to send Emma off to live on the streets, especially with twin babies. She agreed, but not without promising them and herself she’d start looking for a place of her own once she saved enough money to afford it.
So she can understand having to take some time to think and process all of this.
Her question of whether or not he left, is finally answered when he returns to the table, completely wrecked and out of breath.
“Are you um… are you okay?” Stupid question because why would he be okay? She just dropped a bomb on him.
He reclaims his seat across from her, his eyes meeting hers. “I’m uh… I mean, I‘m just shocked, if you can imagine...”
Emma manages a small laugh. “Yes, I can definitely imagine.”
He takes a sip of the tea he tried to pay for but never touched. He thought it would be impolite to order alcohol and drink it in front of her since she couldn’t have any. Emma learned quickly he’s considerate like that.
She reaches into her purse for the cash he had left on the table. She hid it to save their table and told the waitress they’d be back, desperately hoping they would be. “Here.” She hands over the cash. “Dinner is on me… if you’ll still have dinner with me. It’s the least I can do after what I did to you.”
He puts up his hand, refusing it. “Nonsense, Emma, I’ll still have dinner with you, but I’ll foot the bill. It’s the least I can do for knocking you up.”
Her lips tip into a slight smirk as she lays the cash on the table. “If I recall, it was just as much my fault as it was yours.”
He blushes, his face finally cracking a smile. This is good. He’s able to smile despite how real this situation became for him.
“Would you like to see them?” she asks, still clutching onto her purse.
His brows furrow in confusion. “See what?”
She laughs. “The twins, silly.”
His eyes light up, excitement dancing over his handsome features. “You have the sonogram with you?”
She nods. “Yep.” She pulls it out of her purse and hands it to him. “This was at twelve weeks when I found out they’re fraternal.” She smirks. “Not only did your little swimmers get one of my eggs, they got two.”
A big smile takes over his face as he studies the picture in fascination. “What can I say, love, my little swimmers are overachievers.”
Emma snorts. “You can say that again.”
“Do you know the genders?”
She shakes her head. “I’ll find out during my next appointment. It’s on the 20th if you’d like to come.”
He looks up from the sonogram, still donning a smile. “I wouldn’t miss it.”
His features become serious again, and he takes a deep, shaky breath and reaches across the table, taking her hand in his free one. “Whatever you need me to do, I’ll do it. I’ll go with you to the doctor’s appointments and parenting classes, I’ll go out and buy you food when you’re having late-night cravings and I’ll give you foot and shoulder rubs when you’re achy. Whatever I can do to help you feel as comfortable as possible, I’ll do it. And I’ll be there when you’re in labor, I’ll bring you to the hospital and I’ll stay by your side the entire thing, okay? And after that, I want to be involved… as much as you’ll allow me to be. They’re my babies too, and I can’t just walk away to let you raise them by yourself.”
Emma’s kind of shocked, but she shouldn’t be. She knew Killian was a good man; she knew it the night she met him, but after he got so upset and told her he regretted this date, she thought he wouldn’t want anything to do with her, whether he was the father or not. “Really?”
He nods. “Really.”
Hope warms her heart as she gazes at Killian from across the table. This man was devastated when she left him and is now offering to do everything he can to help her and the babies. Their babies.
“We don’t have to discuss all the logistics right now, it’s only our first date after all,” he says with a smirk. “But I want you to know I’m committed to this. I want to be a part of the twins’ lives.”
“So, we’re doing this… together?”
He nods, his eyes twinkling with hope. “Aye, we’re doing this.”
Her eyes sting with tears, and she smiles, trying to fight them away, but one escapes, sliding down her cheek. The twins will have a daddy. A father who will love and cherish them.
Killian sets down the sonogram to brush his knuckles along her cheek, wiping the tear away with his thumb. Her breath catches, her heart fluttering as she closes her eyes, nuzzling her cheek into his touch. The same gentle touch she’d felt that night... before they left for the motel. She’s putty in his hands, just like she was then.
“Do you want to get out of here, love?”
Emma opens her eyes, taken aback by the question.
“We can have our dinners boxed up and take them to my place? I think you’ll find it’s more comfortable there. Besides, if we’re spending time together, don’t you think we should get to know each other a little first… you know just to make sure we got along.”
Emma smirks. “I don’t know, we got along pretty well five months ago. We got along so well in fact…” she sits back and places her hands on her belly, “this happened.”
He chuckles, a pink blush painting his cheeks. He’s so fucking adorable; she doesn’t understand how she walked away from this guy five months ago. What the hell was she thinking?
When the server approaches their table, Killian asks her to box up their meals, and she returns with a big sack. Killian pays for their dinner and rises, extending his hand to Emma. She smiles and grabs her rose and purse before slipping her hand in his.
Emma had a ton of doubts about tonight. A ton of insecurities and a laundry list of reasons why this date was a terrible idea. But now she has hope. So much hope. And Killian lets her know there are no expectations for tonight. And she’s glad because while she could really use a night to relieve some stress, while she’s still feeling a bit turned on even after the very serious and very real discussion they had, she wants to take things slow with Killian. She knows how ridiculous that sounds, considering they’ve already had sex and are having babies together, but she owes Killian a proper morning-after.
So after eating dinner on his comfortable sofa, after he gives her the shoulder and foot massages he’d promised, they slip into his bed together. But instead of making love, Killian wraps his arms around her and just holds her. And when he feels the twins kicking under his palms, he tells her it’s the most incredible feeling he’s ever experienced. And that’s saying something, considering the night they were together five months ago was the best night of his life. Until tonight. Now it’s a very close second considering they are reunited and having a baby together (which is scary, really scary, but at least Emma’s not doing this alone; she’s doing this with him). Nothing will compare to the birth of their twin babies though.
In the morning Emma wakes up before he does, but instead of running away (as if she could run anyway) she surprises him with a kiss on the forehead and a fresh cup of coffee.
And she smiles, knowing this is just the beginning of something good. Something really good.
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superhero au!
Superhero au.
Virgil is a supervillain a la that post about grad school villains. He started out doing it for extra credit but he also needed the cash for student loans...that shit aint cheap yo
so he’s a small-scale “”””supervillain””” mostly making a nuisance of himself by stopping traffic, doing minor vandalism in costume, and sometimes kidnapping notables for like an hour before realizing he can’t keep a plant alive and should not be in charge of a person (’you’ve captured me!! what are you going to do???’ ‘eh i mean you’ll probably get rescued soon, my powers aren’t really meant for long-term kidnapping and I don’t wanna have to take care of you. you think i want another mouth to feed? nah. hey wanna see a meme?’).
(if Sleep exists in this au he’s a common kidnapping victim. son of the mayor or smth. Virgil has learned to hold up a starbucks before kidnapping him tho. not worth it if he can’t bribe him with sweet sweet caffeine. they p much chill for a couple hours until the hostage negotiators come)
basically, Virgil’s not a big enough deal to get shut down permanently. regular cops usually take care of him well enough without superhero involvement. he gets his extra credit for villainry and sometimes some cash from a shadowy organization via crow or some shit. he’s not sure how they know where he lives or what exactly they’re paying him for but hey, more ramen money. whatever gets food on the table.
On the other hand, Patton is a hard-working police officer who really should be in any other job. He’s just too nice for it. But he gets a lot of the suicide calls or emotional trauma stuff because he’s just so damn good at making people feel safe, and no one else wants to do those calls, so he stays on the force. He used to be an EMT, too, which is really helpful. He rooms with Virgil and Logan and Virgil’s weird cousin.
He pretends to be unaware of Virgil’s extracurriculars because he can see that Virgil needs the money and is too proud to ask for help. He does help him patch himself up when necessary and sometimes thinks about going back to his own ‘night job.’
(he used to be a superhero but quit that and EMTing after he realized how much it was draining him physically and emotionally and how deeply unhealthy the whole thing was. credit to Logan for that) He thinks he’d feel better knowing Virgil’s already spoken for as an archnemesis by a hero who won’t seriously try to hurt him. He seriously worries that Virgil will catch the attention of an edgy ‘shoot first and angst about it but make no attempts to fix the mess you’ve made later’ heroes, and he’ll end up in the hospital or worse.
but also, Patton needs that work/life balance and he just can’t maintain it while hero-ing. and Virgil knows what he’s doing, right? he’s a cautious guy. So Patton just tries to be on call when he notices Virgil’s got the first aid kit out or when he talks about ‘evening plans’ (fuck’s sake dude we all know you don’t go out for fun).
For his part, Logan wanted to be a biochemical engineer, but right now he’s taking some time off school. His powers are probably some sort of sensory (?) and he doesn’t fully understand them himself, mostly bc he likes to pretend they don’t exist. but he was getting splitting headaches at school and he just couldn’t go on. He does online courses when he can but he feels really ashamed that he couldn’t do grad school/college, which he was supposed to be good at. He was planning on staying with Patton and Virgil until the end of the lease and he doesn’t know what he’ll do after that.
But then one day Virgil came home freaking the fuck out about something and asked to talk to him, and guess what, he’s got this crazy ‘supervillain for extra credit’ idea. Someone’s got to make sure this fool doesn’t get himself killed. And Patton’s got into police work, and Logan doesn’t want him to go through compassion exhaustion again, and really none of his dumb housemates can take care of themselves (he loves them tho). So he does mad science in the broom closet to try to give Virgil something of an edge over any hero whose attention he might catch and helps him hide his villain-ing from Patton and tries to figure out what he’s gonna do with his life on the side.
He comes up with this crazy graph that shows the optimal balance of super heroes to villains in a healthy society (not enough villains=not enough active heroes when something really bad goes down, as it does every few years, somehow; not enough heroes=obviously bad). He keeps an eye on superpowered activity in the city.
Sometimes he thinks about getting active himself, both to preserve order and balance (if you’re the villain [ie Virgil] you can control the collateral damage to your plots, but if you’re the hero and your roommate is the villain you can both work together to provide for both of your needs [extra credit, enough good hero/villain balance, and safety of roommate] without actually harming anyone...but for either he would need to be able to use his powers effectively and he’s still kind of in denial), and to keep Virgil from getting his fool ass killed, and to keep an eye on Patton while Patton insists on running right into every single superpowered crime scene. In the meantime, he frets over numbers and helps Virgil write coded emails to his grad board about his ‘’’extensive’’’ villainry.
It’s basically like a resume except you have to convince the people involved that you’re super evil.
Logan is good at resumes.
All three of them are plugging right along and Virgil’s actually getting his student loans paid on time with enough money for food and rent besides (one day he even takes them out to eat and they Do Not Talk about how he got the money to do that), and they all think maybe he can do the villain thing for a few more years and then get out of the game forever, when Virgil’s weird cousin gets caught doing some shady-ass stuff.
Turns out he’s in way over his head with some sketchy folks, owes a lot of people money, and used Virgil’s name for half of it. Virgil is in sudden desperate need of more money than he can get through legal means and, of course, Refuses to tell anyone about/ask for help with his predicament. It is strongly recommended to him by his academic adviser that he step up his supervillain game or show up at the bottom of a river south of Manhattan.
Virgil freaks the fuck out and proceeds to dig himself into an even deeper hole, suddenly going for much larger schemes, robbing banks, being less obsessively careful about collateral damage with each plot because he just doesn’t have time to and he’s too desperate.
Cue Roman.
Roman was literally just going to the bank, innocent of all wrongdoing and Not Picking a Fight because he swears this new move is gonna work out, he’s not gonna get arrested to aggravated assault or unauthorized use of an unregistered superhuman ability (it was self-defense! and defense of others! he was rescuing people!).
He happens to be at the bank when Virgil is robbing it. And, well, Virgil isn’t gonna hurt anyone, but Roman doesn’t know that. He ties his shirt over his face to hide his identity and superheros it up, saves the day; Virgil runs away pretty significantly battered but not permanently injured or caught. And now there’s a new superhero in town and Virgil suddenly has an archnemesis. Just what he was avoiding. Great.
Meanwhile, Roman is shocked to learn that he’s being applauded for saving people for once (as opposed to like. arrested) and graciously accepts his new title. Hey, being a superhero could work! He said he was gonna try something new in this town and he will! He’s gonna save the day!
The two of them happily counter each other day after day: Virgil’s getting enough publicity as a villain that his grad board is happy even without him doing any genuine harm, he’s staying one step ahead of the shady figures that come looking for him by name, Patton has made contact once or twice with the new hero and used his office reputation to become Roman’s primary police contact, Logan thinks Virgil is bonkers for all the new levels of villainy he’s doing but he has to admit this is the most alive he’s ever seen him; Roman is enjoying the fame and adoration of being a hero and he’s been cast in a musical and life is looking up for everyone.
But Roman also works in a coffee shop to pay the bills (three jobs. so tired.) and there’s this stressed-looking student who keeps coming in with bruises and sprains and one time he broke his arm in what Roman is absolutely certain wasn’t an accident, and he talks on the phone with people sometimes that really seem to distress him, and he seems like a genuinely nice guy, right? A little guarded, sure, but he’s polite and he tips well and what kind of hero would Roman be if he didn’t at least try to make friends with this troubled but charming young man?
So Roman introduces himself to Virgil in their civilian identities and the two of them are friendly! free coffee here, book recommendation there, on slow days Roman will sit with Virgil and they’ll just chill for a while. Each of them quietly considers the other his friend, but Roman is Concerned about how Virgil is so fucking jumpy, keeps getting these calls that he claims are from his academic adviser but honestly what kind of adviser would be so terrible to talk to, he has all these bruises that show up continuously and his excuses are all plausible, realistic, and backed by evidence provided by Virgil himself, but something just doesn’t seem right.
So when Virgil mentions that his cousin suddenly moved out in the middle of the lease and he needs to find a new roommate and can he post a flyer in the coffee shop? Roman jumps at the opportunity. He’s been renting one room by the month in a shitty part of town and this is a hell of an upgrade, and also, maybe that nagging in the back of his head when Virgil shows up battered will go away. (maybe if he’s there no one will hurt Virgil. what monster would bring deliberate harm onto such a genuinely nice, snarky guy, wonders the superhero who brawls him on the regular)
He’ll have to keep his superhero-ing on the DL from his new roommates (though he’s thinking about telling Virgil, because Virgil seems like he can keep a secret and Roman really wants to have someone to talk to about this), but unlike Virgil, Roman knows how to use strategic stage makeup to hide bruises and minor imperfections. Also, his villain must be kind of weak, because he never seems to do too much damage? Sometimes Roman thinks he doesn’t really want to be a villain, he’s just kind of sad and lonely, like Megamind. Thoughts for another time.
So now, in one apartment, we have:
Patton, former EMT; former superhero of respectable fame; currently a cop assigned to Roman’s superhero persona and also any calls involving emotional competence; knows Virgil is a supervillain but pretends not to; responds immediately to all calls involving superpowers in case it’s his deeply misguided roommate and he needs help;
Logan, one accident away from becoming a super-something if only he could figure out what; provider of Virgil’s biochemical defenses for when superpowers alone are not enough; helping to cover both logistics and material needs for supervillainy (also created Virgil’s outfit because you can’t do crime in a hoodie you heathen, no one will take you seriously, Virgil had to talk him down from including a necktie); searching for his place in life; not entirely certain why Virgil is stepping up his illegal activities but not happy about it; currently househusband to all of his roommates;
Virgil, extremely stressed grad student; villain for fun and profit and mostly because he needs the money to not get murdered; a bit of an adrenaline junkie; really staring to get into this villain thing but he sometimes wishes he didn’t have to be the bad guy; definitely feeling hunted by shadowy entities and organizations and trying desperately not to bring anyone down with him;
and Roman, the hero. who is beginning to think he and his villain might have been friends, in another life.
It is both a sitcom and a shitshow of epic proportions while everyone tries to hide each other’s secrets without letting ppl know what they know, Roman comes clean to Virgil and Virgil freaks the fuck out about it, Patton frets about everyone and everything until he’s stressing himself sick, Logan makes chemical explosions in the broom closet and the whole block is evacuated every other Tuesday and they all have to pretend not to know about it, Roman wants to get a dog and also for Virgil to get out of whatever abusive relationship he’s Clearly In, Virgil wants a nap, Patton wants a nap, they all want a nap.
What I’m saying is: Superhero au.
@stella-scriptor another one for you, buddy
#virgil sanders#sanders sides virgil#roman sanders#patton sanders#logan sanders#i really wanna write this but it would be so damn long if i did#seriously do tell me about any and all superhero au's though i love them#please i need more superheroes#play with me in this spaaaaace
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12/8/17 – No Contact: Pet Store Blues
It snowed last night. In Houston. What’s weird is that my dad predicted that it was going to get really cold. Tried to encourage me to take my peacoat. I like my peacoat but it’s wool and I doubt it’d get much use in Houston. Admittedly, my fleece jacket isn’t enough to keep me warm anymore but I still have a leather jacket.
Not very vegetarian, but I already said I couldn’t go full vegan. Ignoring the times I’ve eaten meat since I got here.
That said, I’m in the 240’s for my weight now. I was concerned I’ve gained weight but I haven’t. I’m still losing. This is a lot of good news for me. I’m glad. I was concerned that I was gaining this week. Seems I haven’t been. Of course, my progress of which I’m losing weight may have been slowed down but that’s fine. So long as I’m not gaining.
Of course, that’s ignoring the fact that I might not hit my goal by the end of April but not the point.
I just checked my credit. It’s bad. Really bad. My dad told me that I shouldn’t pay my old bills because, “What are they going to do? Find you?” Of course, he’s from a different age. Today, we have this thing called “credit” and that follows you. So, no. It’s far worse.
Thing is, I had the money to pay the bills. I could have paid all of them. Instead, I paid most of them and decided not to pay one. That was when he said, “Don’t pay.” So I didn’t. And now it bit me in the ass.
My dad likes to dramatically proclaim how right he is all the time and how it’s his burden to bear, watching people not listen to him and suffer for it. I listened to him. I suffered for it. I tell my cousin not to listen to him. I tell him for a reason.
My dad screwed me over. He didn’t mean to, but I was ignorant. My brother is pretty aware of how the world works whereas my dad is just out of touch. I really need to establish contact with him again. I’ve basically fallen off the face of the earth with a lot of my family. Personally, I feel it’s better that way.
I wonder if my poor credit will follow me into other nations.
So, Adela came home early because Max had to go to the vet. I was all aboard until I realized that it’s in a pet store Esther and I went to earlier this year. She just wanted to look around and we brought Max with us. I was close to getting pretty emotional, so I asked Adela if I could wait in the car.
I was actually pretty happy when Esther was there. She was happy too. She was excited to see all the animals and was just… uplifting. We picked something up, I think for Max. Canned dog food. Yeah, that was it. Because Adela was out and Max wasn’t eating. He has a lot of mood swings for a dog.
When we were about to check out, the cashier asked if we wanted to buy some cat food, which will be used for donations in a local shelter. I asked a bit more about it and brought up my cat I had in Texas who was a stray so I bought a few of them. Esther, who was quite supportive mind you, was super surprised. She mentioned that my current cat was in California and we both looked at her and I told her that we weren’t taking the cat food. The cat food was what is going to the shelters, not the money. She was like, “Oh,” and was perhaps a bit embarrassed.
She was endearing. I miss her.
I know why she doesn’t want to talk to me. Because she thinks I’m a Narcissist, as mentioned before. Like NPD narcissist. I don’t blame her. But fucking hell… Shane fucking betrayed me on that. Daniel was reporting everything to Dennis and Esther. I had a dream that I was trying to explain that Shane was telling me that Dennis was saying all these horrible things about me. I was telling this to both Dennis and Esther and when I said it, they both rolled their eyes.
Shane said he wasn’t talking to me while filling me with these dumb ideas. He was filling them with dumb ideas but the thing is, I was the only one who was actually pushed into acting on these dumb ideas. I believed Shane. Hell, I defended Shane.
And Daniel… he chose his brother over me. Which is understandable but it baffles me. I’m still friendly with Daniel but I can’t trust him. I revealed a conversation between Dennis and me earlier this year. About how Dennis was angry with Daniel and said that he would break a bottle over Daniel’s head. I shared it because I wanted to joke with Daniel but he had no idea what I was saying. I realized Dennis was lying and because I was upset, I decided to share it with Daniel.
The thing is, Dennis was always like that with Daniel. Like they were never that close. That’s why it surprised me. Esther told me that I was trying to turn Daniel against Dennis. No. I thought Dennis was targeting me and literally gone crazy. I legitimately thought Daniel was in danger.
Dennis has never really said anything nice about Daniel. Daniel, however, is a good brother. He’s protecting Dennis. Daniel deserves better, honestly, but that’s fine. What bothers me is that Daniel never approached me. Never told me I’m acting childish or petty. Never corrected me.
People don’t talk to me. Those who do have their own agenda.
Whatever. Daniel is still a nice guy. But… he can’t be trusted. Not because he chose to reveal everything to Dennis but because he refused to tell me anything. He’ll nod his head and say, “Sure thing!” and then blow me off. If I discuss anything serious with him, he won’t tell me how he really feels. If that serious topic is something that I’m legitimately concerned with, then there is a good chance that these concerns will fall on deaf ears. I’ll get passed over for priorities.
Daniel isn’t to be trusted but he can be tolerated. Shane can’t be trusted either. And now, I guess he won’t be tolerated. He isolated himself now. Maybe. Possible he’s talking to Dennis and Esther again, but I’m not sure. Not that it matters anymore.
I have plenty of friends but I have few allies.
So, I was pretty concerned Ariel was angry at me. Yesterday I pissed her off. She was in a bad mood and my shitty joke made it worse. Today, we hardly spoke but we’re speaking now. Seems she drained her phone’s battery from 88% to 0.
She sent a selfie. This makes me happy. Helps after today.
Oh, I had meat again. A torta. It’s like a Mexican sandwich. Has ham and stuff, was super good. Had it with horchata. There is a chance that Ariel may come to Houston. I’ll talk to Adela about it. As I was drinking, all I was thinking was “I can’t wait to share this with Ariel.”
I know, it seems like I have a love triangle with Esther and Ariel which is stereotypical for a narcissist, but I don’t. Especially since Esther is having nothing to do with me. And that Ariel was very important in our relationship anyways. It’s complicated but it’s not to support my ego.
Messaged my sister earlier. Was talking to her about credit. We’re talking now and she’s saying I should get a credit card and it’ll help. Not a bad idea. She suggests against getting a loan. Credit card is best option. Hrm...
Ariel might get a job that pays 10k Euro a month. Holy fuck. Like, HOLY fuck. It’d be with Netflix. Just has to translate English to Dutch for Netflix. And she could translate English to Albanian. And English to French. Like, she’s quad-lingual. I’m envious. I have trouble with Spanish and my Spanish has gotten worse within recent years.
This is a great opportunity. She has back trouble from a workplace injury. Pieces of her spine are now titanium. A job like that would be great for her. This is exactly what she needs. And 10k Euro is like 12k USD. A month. That’s triple digits a year. Geez. I hope I could have her as a sugar mama. :D
Oof… I don’t want to sound like I’d leech off her. I was hoping my books would sell and I could live comfortably off that. But I haven’t worked on them in days. Since Esther exploded and began yelling at me. Through the phone. But if Ariel could afford to come here on her own accord, that’d be easier for me in the long run. I’d make decent pay if I enlist. I’d save up and use that to move out of the country. Maybe she’ll still have that job when I’m out. Then she and I can live together. Then I could start writing my books again and things won’t turn to crap. That’d be ideal…
I’m not sure I’m that lucky. Not that Ariel would pay my way for everything, but I’m not sure I’ll be able to enlist. And even then, for how long? And Ariel would have to be willing to wait even longer afterwards. Honestly, though… I hope she gets the job for at least herself. I could vanish tomorrow but she’d still have to live with herself. Hopefully, she can afford it.
And she needs a break. She really needs it. Life hasn’t been easy for her. Life hasn’t been easy for a lot of people. But if anyone needs a break, it’d be her. And perhaps Esther. But definitely Ariel.
She’s in bed now. I’m going to get ready for bed myself. I have to wake up at about 6:30 in the FUCKING morning. Gotta leave at 7:40. Not ideal, but that’s life. Adela could drive me if I’m late. I’m a little concerned that my attire won’t be warm enough. My fleece jacket is blue but light. Not really good for stopping the wind. My leather jacket is warm and black but I will be wearing a lot of black. I hate black.
Well, I guess it won’t matter. Time to set an alarm for 6. Later.
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