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#we love badass bitches who have intense social anxiety
bixels · 3 months
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Pinkie forced her to go to a party.
This honestly isn't even Sunset Shimmer anymore, but I don't give a fack, she's by far my favorite character in the AU. Can you tell I have a character type, lol.
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contranymss · 7 years
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RP: Dean, Tracy, Ryan, Fabien, Tom, Chet, Charlie, Tony
dean;;
sexuality headcanon: gavinsexual bi as heck
otp: gavin 5ever (also anna)
brotp: gavin. (and tracy. and anna.)
notp: Ty. People that aren’t Gavin or Anna.
first headcanon that pops into my head: He and Gavin went to Prom, and elected to go without dates and just be cool good lookin’ bros together. Dean lowkey pretended it was a date in his head the whole time.
one way in which I relate to this character: i love being in denial
thing that gives me second hand embarrassment about this character: so many things. he’s an awkward bean sometimes.
tracy;;
sexuality headcanon: yes
otp: I don’t really.....ship her.....romantically......with people........no romo. (though for .5 seconds i was super into the idea of tracy/amy and both of them leaving their respective menfolk, and maybe amy sort of......growing up because of tracy’s influence. and maybe both of them still goin’ out bangin’ dudes because they both really love dick.......idk.)
brotp: gavin, dean, chuck
notp: tommy. also war. also monogamy in general.
first headcanon that pops into my head: She acted out when she was young - hanging out with a MacLeod, sleeping around, throwing lavish over the top parties, drinking, etc. - to set herself apart. She didn’t want to be the girl with the dead older brother, or or just one of a set of twins.
one way in which I relate to this character: occasional crippling self doubt, don’t always have the best taste in people
thing that gives me second hand embarrassment about this character: she....married...........tommy...........and dated...........war.............
ryan;;
sexuality headcanon: gay. v gay.
otp: i almost want to say bradley.......because there’s a history there and, in their own way, love. also lowkey fabien but who knows if that’ll ever happen bc now i need to talk to erin about it.
brotp: sage, chuck, lowkey potentially fabien (also there’s a part of me that’s really attached to gavin and ryan’s relationship even though we have done nothing with them since tracy found out that ryan isn’t dead)
notp: also bradley. and balthazar but he’s dead now. so.
first headcanon that pops into my head: he never expected to.......make........friends..........when he came back, so the fact that he’s become so close with sage really surprises him, but he wouldn’t trade that friendship for anything.
one way in which I relate to this character: anxiety and problems with....being........social..........
thing that gives me second hand embarrassment about this character: he’s just generally awkward
fabien;;
sexuality headcanon: tbh he doesn’t even know. brainwashed fabien is straight as heck, but the actual fabien? he’s actually not all that interested in women. also not totally interested in sex in general. he doesn’t dislike it or anything, and it definitely feels nice, but in the beginning, he was, in large part, doing it because that’s what everyone else was doing it. i mean, his first several times having sex, he wasn’t anywhere near sober either. he was drunk or high or both, and people suggested things and he just.........did them. for some of them, he was closer to sober than with others, but like........his sex life was mainly due to social obligation (maybe obligation is the wrong word idk) and anyone who looked at a list of all the people he’d had sex with, it would come off like he was bi or pan. and also part of him sleeping with women when he was younger was because of it being ingrained in his mind that he was supposed to be interested in women. that it was normal and healthy and what he was supposed to do. (this is all so jumbled and rambly wowzers.)
otp: honestly........bradley..........even if it’s not entirely healthy, and, well, they’re bros. but like. it’s the most intense interpersonal relationship he has, and bradley knows him better than anyone, and bradley is the only person he has ever broken down in front of. he trusts bradley in a way he doesn’t trust anyone else. as much as he tries to hide a lot of the bad stuff from bradley, because he wants to protect him - and all of his brothers - bradley still knows more about him than most. he knows about thierry’s abuse, he knows about his abusive ex, and after the whole situation with Balthazar, he probably would have been able to, eventually open up to bradley about what happened when he got kidnapped (because right now war is the only one that knows even part of that) had the whole rehab thing not happened.but david is a close second. and probably would have less of a fucked up relationship with him. they can relate on a lot of fronts, and sure, they’re both fucked up individuals who do a lot of drugs and drink a lot. but like....the thing they have is new for both of them, and it’s so important that they both have someone like that, even if it’s been put on hold because fabien’s all brainwashed.
brotp: david because tbh david is kind of his first actual friend? also bradley. also kind of war??? maybe not lately but like...war is the brother that he doesn’t always feel like he needs to protect. and yeah, he hates that he’s the kind of person that’s always like rawr, protect bros at all costs but it’s not like he’s doing it on purpose, and the universe kind of just......keeps giving him more reasons to feel like he should be protecting bradley. and.........idk. i had more thoughts but words are hard.
notp: part of me wants to say ariane, because had he not been brainwashed, he wouldn’t really have any interest in her. but the way he makes her feel right now, outside of the huge gross awfullness of the whole situation......like........With her, he feels loved. Feels like he deserves to be loved. Like he’s a good person, or has the potential to be a good person. He genuinely does feel happy right now, with her. Feels like he has a future that’s actually worth something. But like......it’s all a lie. It’s all fake. She doesn’t necessarily like him. She likes this version of him, the one that’s been molded to be what Josiah wants. What his father wants. And the whole situation is just so fucked up, and it’s doubtful he would come out of this and still feel the same way about her.
first headcanon that pops into my head: he still has the tiniest crush on Gavin. Like, it’s not really romantic, or sexual even. It’s just....Gavin was the first guy he was with, and sure, he wasn’t sweet and loving or anything, but he was respectful and attentive. And, sure, he fits his public persona in certain ways, and can be a bit of a stereotype, but he’s not totally awful. He’s a much better person than he ever would have expected, and Fabien is glad that Gavin was his first experience with a man. He wishes more of his experiences would have been like that.
one way in which i relate to this character: self loathing and dislike of people in general?
thing that gives me second hand embarrassment about this character: brainwashed famine is just...........yep.
tom;;
sexuality headcanon: i don’t know which term he prefers (i think it’s been stated as polysexual in headcanons in the past) but he’s def into multiple genders
otp: obvs gavin. also charlie, which makes me sad because they haven’t........been talking much.........lately.........also chuck >.>
brotp: chuck, charlie, can i say willa? i’m gonna say willa. also lissy.
notp: sarah.............
first headcanon that pops into my head: he feels a lot of guilt over the fact that he waited so long to get chuck out of washington. but even then.....sometimes he wonders if he did the right thing by taking him and bringing him across the country. he doesn’t think he should have left him, but he wonders if he should have done things differently. or if chuck staying with tom, and growing up in fort macleod was really a good thing.
one way in which i relate to this character: i hate all of the people
thing that gives me second hand embarrassment about this character: tbh he’s such an awkward bean sometimes. like.....sure, he’s this surly badass cop guy, but like.......he’s the awkwardest bean.
chet;;
sexuality headcanon: it’s chet!!! who the heck knows!!! does he even know??? we don’t know!!! (but def aro spec)
otp: okay...........so..........i lowkey really ship him with charlie.........also would really............be into...........him and fabien............also anna
brotp: mark, even though we haven’t done anything there yet. you know why. siobahn. lilith. charlie again. also anna. fight me.
notp: lowkey amy. and in most cases just anything actually romantic? idk.
first headcanon that pops into my head: clearly he did tap when he was a youngster. don’t take this away from me.
one way in which i relate to this character: honestly, we all have a little chet inside us, don’t we?
thing that gives me second hand embarrassment about this character: he thought chuck was a sex worker and didn’t mention this until after he fucked him
charlie;;
sexuality heacanon: she’s pretty much straight. it’s unfortunate, because men are unfortunate, but she’s not really interested in ladies.
otp: tom. lowkey ed.
brotp: tom, eph, chet, tony, ed and harry.
notp: ansen. but. well. we haven’t gotten to that yet.
first headcanon that pops into my head: she’s always wanted children and she would make a fantastic mother. but she found out when she was a teenager that it’s highly unlikely she’ll ever be able to have children of her own. tbh it’s part of why she’s so bitter towards amy, because that bitch is fertile as hell
one way in which i relate to this character: people are just......nah.
thing that gives me second hand embarrassment about this character: i’m not sure there actually is anything????
tony;;
sexuality headcanon: he........huh. def not straight. but like.....i’m not sure he’s really labelled himself? he hasn’t exactly had much of an opportunity to explore what his sexuality means to him as a person. i personally see him as bi, but //shrug.
otp: i mean...........charlie tbh........not even sexually or romantically but like.......that is the one true tony pairing, my brethren.
brotp: also charlie. and eph. and potentially mark in the future.
notp: neil. fucking gretchen.
first headcanon that pops into my head: he has totally thought about neil while having sex with amy, oops. and he totally bought a bottle of the cologne that neil used to wear. god, he misses him so much.
oen way in which i relate to this character: i too think that charlie is rad and that her mother and their other brothers should have let her be herself more when she was younger.
thing that gives me second hand embarrassment about this character: he thought it was a good idea to be friends with neil?????
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redscullyrevival · 7 years
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Ship of Destiny: Liveship Traders Rundown
@sonnetscrewdriver this has been a wild ride! TW: Spoilers abound and discussion of rape follows. 
Setting/Plot/Narrative
For being my least favorite installment I do feel that this created world and it’s social/magical systems arrives at it’s most cohesive fruition in this last book, which makes sense, and I am thankful for that. 
I also found the idea that a large bulk of what was expressed and used to motivate and further the story is tossed away, or altered, by the end of the book - in the sense that Tintaglia and the reintroduction of dragons into the world along with the recognition of the Pirate Isles reorders power, society, and economy - to be a unique and interesting choice. 
Its a bit of a tricky move but it didn’t feel like “a waste” to me to have learned so thoroughly the world only for it to be rearranged at the end. It all worked towards the total theme of the series of inevitable change and response, in accepting life and taking responsibility for only what we can control. 
Or, at least, that’s the big takeaway I got!
Althea Vestrit
Fuck
Okay
We’ll... we’ll have to come back to Althea in a second.
Captain Kennit
HHHHMMMMMMMSLDKFNL:KSLDK
This fucker.
Like a lot of characters with well done tragic backstories I was rooting for Kennit. I didn’t hate him but I didn’t really like him either, you know? As I said last time he exudes the “cool motive, still murder” type of deal - Kennit is a character who the majority of the series straddles the line of never being someone who gains reader sympathy while still being recognized by the reader as a deeply damaged person not entirely of his own making. 
So I rooted for him. 
Through out the entire series Kennit gets away with a lot of stuff and I understand from a narrative perspective that him raping Althea was a choice to have him cross a line. As the reader we know he raped Althea whereas everyone around, aside from Althea and Etta, isn’t sure he is capable of it. 
Which turned into some intense fucking writing. 
Because it isn’t ‘Kennit raped Althea so now he is the bad man everyone hates and a common enemy’, no. He remains captain. He remains a hero, the pirate king, the freer of slaves. A “good man”. We know Kennit isn’t a good man, but then again we’ve known that all along. We really have. All the signs were there. What was done to Kennit was all that was left of Kennit. Paragon tried to take that pain and suffering from him, but Kennit gave the hurt he received and that’s one reality of trauma and failure to cope. Because Kennit was never coping. 
Ultimately I pitied Kennit while also accepting his actions as being abhorrent - getting angry and baring frothing teeth wasn’t my reaction. That isn’t how I react to this type of thing in narratives a lot of the time, especially with one that is trying it’s darnedest to be honest and respectable when it comes to this particular reflection of real life. 
In the chapter the rape happened, the second my eyes read it, I came to hate Kennit. And that was the right response. That’s why it was written the way it was, I believe, so as to finally push the reader into having a real solid opinion about Kennit beyond his fake persona and his personal grab for power and fame elevating others; to remove benefit of the doubt completely and say “This is not a good person” no matter what his puzzled together sob story is and no matter what he has done in the name of social and political progress. Kennit is a shitbag human. 
This series stresses, to an almost anxiety inducing degree, that people and life and situations are complex ever shifting, evolving, and decaying breathing entities. The only character who was truly stagnant and unmovable was Kennit, who hid under the guise of modernization and revolution. He had to be made irredeemable and dead. 
This is a tight narrative that doesn’t abide such a person, doesn’t let such a person survive - that’s why so much emphasis was placed on the idea of Kennit’s luck. Something had to keep him around until he finally made a change, a choice, that would actually alter him.  
To that end, I “like” the character as a device but not as an idea of a person or as a character-character. 
What’s just as cutting is that Winthrow, Vivacia, Jek, (and probably society/history) doubt Althea. It’s gut wrenchingly frustrating. And it taints those characters just as much as it paints Kennit; and entirely because we know the total truth how they don’t.  
Althea Vestrit
Phew, okay, lets try this again. 
This was some hard shit. 
Althea’s rape wasn’t the “worst” rape scene I’ve ever read and it probably won’t be the last, but what made the scene so difficult wasn’t any fucked up occupation with focusing on the physical but by focusing on the emotional and psychological confusion, terror, and exhaustion of the moment which worked to heighten the violation. I was thankful it wasn’t a long scene or I’d have to have skimmed it, and making it short was a smart choice because it gives strength to the idea that any form of unwanted physicality, no matter how briefly depicted (or in actuality), has massive repercussions. Basically it was a small mercy that we didn’t have to linger and wallow in the misery of the act to get across the wrongness of it and that’s all do to the writing.
I feel a bit bad for focusing on Althea’s rape so heavily when talking about her and when talking about Kennit because it’s kind of like “Wow, well, there is more to her than this” - but I also think that’s a thought better reserved for a real person more than a character. 
I said my reaction to this kind of thing in stories a lot of the time isn’t real true anger, and I stand by that, but come on! Obviously I get a little angry at the same time! I invest in characters and I get mad at what is done to them in-story just as much as I get mad they had something done to them because that was a choice made for the story, ya know? 
Like, sometimes the emotion is “UGH this character wouldn’t do that, why is this happening?” anger and other times it’s “UGH what is this character doing stop being a dummy (because I understand them as being capable of doing this dumb thing)” anger. And sometimes it’s both lol. I’m a mysterious woman!
Anyways, my point is that poor Althea gets a bit overshadowed by her rape but that isn’t to say I think her aftermath was handled poorly - on the contrary I was pleased with her outrage and paranoia and cunning and muddled swamp of complex reactions and fears and triumphs. 
What I can’t decide is whether my still not totally endearing myself to Althea even after all she came through is the biggest fault of the series or it’s most crowned achievement if I’m completely honest. 
Kyle Haven
Bye bitch. 
Winthrow Vestrit
This fucking kid.
I’m almost devastated that Winthrow was so enamored with Kennit but like I get it? uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuughghghghgh 
I love Winthrow and Etta, they have a kind of relationship I enjoy, and I guess I’m happy they’re on the mend post-Kennit? 
From Winthrow’s faulted, stunted, half-truth perspective of Kennit doubt over the man’s ability to rape makes some sense - but as the reader I felt I couldn’t allow Winthrow the grace of understanding his hesitation to believe his aunt.    
So, Winthrow was tainted by Kennit and now writing this I’m a little shocked to find I’m a little bitter about it! LOL
My sweet precious priest boy where did you go?!
sigh
Its one of those things were I respect the choice and it makes total sense and thus speaks true of the character for Winthrow to doubt Althea and only realize it possible after talking to Etta - but as a reader and fan I wish Winthrow disowned Kennit immediately so I could continue to like him as I had all along. 
sigh
I thought it hilarious Winthrow was scandalized by his sister and Reyn’s relationship though, lol, like step back and get some perspective you prude.
Keffria Vestrit
STILL THE FAVORITE!
I’m biased at this point though.
Locking down the home front by doing all she could, especially by letting go of things she didn’t want to - that’s some badass guts and fucking growth right there.
FUCK YEAH
Her struggle with how to rearrange her bedroom in tandem with her understanding of Kyle and her place in the world was brilliance.
Ronica Vestrit
My favorite spy.
I really wanted her to take Serilla under her wing and phew thankfully that kind of happened at the end - I was so worried about my girl Serilla, I’m glad her fate is tied with Ronica’s. 
Malta
Oh boy oh boy what a treat!
Malta is my hero lol
She is a lot more like her mother than she thinks - her ability to navigate social standings, to become smaller or larger as needed, and to read others and bargain comes from mama not Kyle. I hope, I really hope, she knows that. 
My little survivor.
Seriously though, Malta evolved so much faster than anyone else and proved to be much more adapt at it then anyone else. The political/social manipulation she grows to be an expert in was some of my favorite world building/scenes in the entire series. 
I love her so much. 
Reyn Khuprus
I love him too.
I’m so glad the Rain Wilder’s drop their veils and open up, I can’t wait to read more and see how that goes for them!
Reyn’s desperate search for Malta was some fun pining but the best bits was how the trip worked to better illustrate the workings of dragons and give some insight into the Elderlings and what’s in store for the future before we ever get to the bardering table.
Just a sweet, sweet dragon boy.
Vivacia
Good for her, I guess. 
Pretty apathetic to be honest lol
I don’t know why Vivacia slipped away from me, especially since she is now in a good place, her own real entity! What’s wrong with me as a reader?!
Paragon 
I’m so relieved but so upset omg
Etta
Oh baby girl I’m so so so sorry.
Etta is a really fascinating character and I really hope to see, or at least hear of her, again. She isn’t done, she has the least resolve and most open ended goodbye out of everyone and I want more of her and for her than that.
I really grew to appreciate Etta and if I was going to make a friend out of this cast of characters she and Keffria are my first picks; and I’d love if ever they got a chance to meet. They’d help each other so much. 
I wonder if their parallels are intentional as the two most influential women in Winthrow’s life? Hmm. Probably not. Both are much more interesting as they are on their own without pitting them against Winthrow; especially Etta.  
Satrap Cosgo
This fuck nugget gets no props for growing. 
Kiki redeemed herself by like a thousand and I felt for her in the end but Cosgo can suck an egg. 
Although there is a part of me that enjoyed his detached and surly attitude towards everything. 
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sweetsuccesssociety · 7 years
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