#v underrated era for him i fear
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Doctor Who episodes ranked let’s go
(o’th’ revived era. and eight’s movie because i’ve seen it)
and two-parters are counted as one, but i get to define what a ‘two-parter’ is. this is because i’m in charge not you
9.11 Heaven Sent aka the stars align and somehow Moffat manages to pull an incredible script out of his arse after being stuck up there for so long aka Capaldi is the new Atlas from carrying his entire era aka now you understand why i’m splitting up some two-parters and not others aka ahaha 9.11 lol
3.8/9 Human Nature / The Family of Blood
1.9/10 The Empty Child / The Doctor Dances
3.10 Blink
2.4 The Girl in the Fireplace
4.12/13 The Stolen Earth / Journey’s End
1.6 Dalek
6.i A Christmas Carol
3.11 Utopia
4.8/9 Silence in the Library / Forest of the Dead
7.v The Time of the Doctor okay hear me out first thing is i’m an absolute sucker second thing is why couldn’t season 7 have actually seeded any of this with actual thought and subtly rather than mystery-box hackery it literally makes me think of how much better his era could’ve been if Moffat wasn’t so up his own arse
2.8/9 The Impossible Planet / The Satan Pit
7.iv The Day of the Doctor
4.11 Turn Left
3.4 Girldick
1.12/13 Bad Wolf / The Parting of the Ways
7.iii The Night of The Doctor aka my boi Eight finally gets done justice
4.10 Midnight
4.6 The Doctor’s Daughter
3.2 The Shakespeare Code
3.i The Runaway Bride
2.12/13 Army of Ghosts / Doomsday
2.3 School Reunion
6.11 The God Complex
4.1 Partners in Crime
10.11/12 World Enough, and Time / The Doctor Falls (look, i’m a sucker i know, and i couldn’t give a shit about Gomez and Simm, but fuck you Moffat actually figured out how to write human emotions. Talalay’s finest hour. Lucas’ finest hour. Moffat did not deserve a swan song but he got himself one somehow)
5.2 The Beast Below
8.8 Mummy on the Orient Express (despite the awful, horrible ending, see below (very far below))
4.7 The Unicorn and the Wasp
4.2 The Fires of Pompeii
7.12 Neil Gaiman’s Good Episode
1.1 Rose
5.1 The Eleventh Hour
2.7 The Idiot’s Lantern
10.1 The Pilot
5.10 Vincent and the Doctor
4.i Voyage of the Damned
6.4 The Neil Gaiman Fanfic Hour
3.1 Smith and Jones
4.4 The Sontaran Stratagem / The Poison Sky
6.10 The Girl Who Waited
1.2 The End of The World
5.12/13 The Pandorica Opens / The Big Bang
2.i The Christmas Invasion
6.7 A Good Man Jumps The Shark
5.6 The Vampires of Venice
4.3 Planet of the Ood
7.ii The Snowmen
1.11 Boom Town
3.12 The Sound of Drums / Last of the Time Lords
1.7 The Long Game
7.7 The Rings of Akhaten
8.6 The Caretaker
5.7 Amy’s Choice
9.7/8 Zygons. you can basically hear Capaldi’s back cracking from him carrying it
4.v/vi The End of Time, Parts 1 & 2
10.6 Extremis, the most underrated episode fuck you
4.ii The Next Doctor
8.5 Time Heist
6.1/2 The Impossible Astronaut / Day of the Moon
2.1 New Earth
10.3 Twelve Decks a Racist
9.ii The Husbands of River Song (yeah i’m a sucker, the ending gets me)
6.3 Curse of the Black Pearl spot, fuck
11.1 The Woman Who Fell To Earth (based on how it made me feel in 2018, looking back yeah the warning signs were all there)
5.4/5 The Time of Angels / Flesh and Stone
5.11 The Lodger
1.3 The Unquiet Dead
7.4 The Power of Three aka Chris Chibnall Shits Himself on Live Television
2.5/6 Rise of the Cybermen / The Age of Steel
7.9 Hide
10.5 Oxygen aka La Problema Es Capitalismo
8.1 Deep Breath
2.2 Tooth and Nail claw, fuck
1.8 Father’s Day
11.3 Rosa (bring back Blackman as an episode writer, she wrote Noughts & Crosses, she can do it)
7.11 The Crimson ‘Orror
6.8 Let’s Kill Hitler
6.5/6 The Rebel Flesh / The Almost People
4.iv The Waters of Mars
7.6 oh no it’s clara
9.10 yaay clara’s dead
5.8/9 The Hungry Earth / Cold Blood
12.5 Fugitive of the Judoon (again, based on how i felt watching it for the first time. it was a good episode and an interesting mystery box, just one filled with shit)
1.4/5 Aliens of London / World War Three
7.5 The Angels Take amy lol
2.11 Fear Her
8.4 Listen, aka the first episode that Capaldi carries, despite Moffat being himself again
10.ii Twice Upon a Time (ugh we could’ve had a brilliant trilogy to see out Capaldi, but instead we get Moffat masturbating on live television for an hour. look, The Doctor could have had an actual character arc - they feel like they’re on borrowed time after their resurrection on Trenzalore, after the events on Gallifrey they feel like any sort of feelings of ‘duty’ as last of the time lords (as errant and fleeting as such feelings might’ve been) are resolved, and after failing their BIG MASSIVE SEASON 10 ARC with Missy and getting stabbed in the back, and BILL [redacted for spoilers], they’re happy to accept their death - and that’s where the season ends. yuletide 2017 could’ve ended this arc, they’re taught the love of the universe again, they see the goodness they bring to all life - Clara, i am a good man. and when they sit down to die, those words ‘maybe just one more go’ could’ve had the weight of the universe behind them, it could’ve been the greatest who line ever written, had that line actually had weight on its shoulders. Moffat is a hack. mystery-boxing is hacking, end of story. Capaldi, the finest actor ever in the role, was done dirty by scripts with no weight and planning. Grand Moff lives up his own arse - that power gives him the ability to write incredible episodes such as Heaven Sent and everything he ever touched under Davies - but it makes all series, arcs and continuity fall apart into a pile of shit. this episode is the finest example - a universe of potential, reduced to one hour of self-congratulatory masturbation)
6.9 Night Terrors
11.9 It Takes You Away (the one with the frog god)
7.10 Journey to the Centre of the TARDIS
9.12 Heaven Sent Part II: Whoops
8.9 Flatline
7.3 A Town Called Widowmaker
4.iii Planet of the Dead
9.1/2 The Magician’s Apprentice / The Witch’s Familiar
6.12 Closing Time
3.7 42
13.i Eve of the Daleks (the aisling bea one)
8.3 Robot of Sherwood
9.5/6 Maisie Williams
6.13 The Wedding of River Song
5.3 Victory of the Daleks
8.11/12 Dark Water / Death in Heaven aka i’m sorry Gomez but not even you can carry this
3.6 The Lazarus Experiment
11.i Resolution (…of the Daleks)
10.2 Emoji Robots
8.2 Into the Dalek
10.5 Knock Knock. Who’s There? Yer mum
7.13 The Name of the Doctor aka the Biggest Waste of Richard E. Grant until Rise of Skywalker
7.2 Dinosaurs on a Plane
10.8/9 The Pyramid at the End of the World / The Lie of the Land
Doctor Who: The Movie!
11.6 Demons of the Punjab
7.1 Asylum of the Daleks
7.8 Cold War aka i’m starting to think Mark Gatiss might be a bad writer actually
3.4/5 Daleks in Manhattan / Evolution of the Daleks
11.5 P’ting
9.3/4 Under the Lake / Before the Flood aka the Biggest Waste of Peter Serafinowicz since the Clone Wars didn’t bring him back. also a deaf person falling in love with their interpreter is the most toxic thing ever. and it’s 90 more minutes of season 9 tedium ugh
2.10 Love and Monsters. yeah this high up
8.7 The anti-abortion episode. and it’s not just for that fact alone nonono, The Doctor is such an unbelievable unforgivable cunt this time. at least Clara calls them out in that brilliant final-ish scene BUT they’re still unforgivable AND they get forgiven anyway next week?? literally they take the way Clara’s character arc was going and throw it all in the bin
8.10 In The Forest of the Shite
11.7 Kerblam!
10.9 Empress of Mars aka i’m starting to think Mark Gatiss might be a bad writer actually
9.i Last Christmas aka remember how they reset Clara’s character arc after Mummy for literally no reason???? THEY FUCKING DID IT AGAIN!! she’s literally put in limbo for an ENTIRE SEASON, after they gave her TWO good offramps and apparently chickened the fuck out from using them?? and expected me to care when she (spoiler)? also the episode’s like really boring. bonus points for the absolutely perfect casting of Nick Frost tho, very nominative determinism
10.i is my hatred of Doctor Mysterio unwarranted? probably. but i still hate it
12.8 The Haunting of Villa Diodati, the most overrated episode fuck you. no it is not ‘the only good episode of season 12’ - it’s just as bad as the rest. The Doctor is unnecessarily unlikeable. the villain boy is nonsense, uninteresting and unlikeable. and worst of all - i don’t want to have violent sex with any of the people in this villa
12.4 Nikola Tesla’s Tower of Terror
11.8 The Witchfinders
9.9 Sleep No More aka i’m starting to think Mark Gatiss might be a bad writer actually
13.2 Flux Part 2: War of the Sontarans (oh yeah like they don’t do war normally, that’s like saying the fucking ,, toasting of the toaster or something)
7.i The Doctor, the Widow, and the Wardrobe (it’s only Chibnall from here on out let’s goo)
12.1/2 Spyfall. literally how the FUCK do you waste both Stephen Fry AND Lenny fucking Henry how the fuck. also The Doctor basically committed a nazism right
12.3 Orphan 55, the second most underrated episode - a lot of people say it’s Chibnall’s worst but i think there’s worse
12.i Revolution of the Daleks (the priti patel one)
11.2 The Ghost Monument
13.4 Flux Part 4: Village of the Angels
11.10 The Battle of Rashhcjxjshog s Kjalapados
12.7 Can You Hear Me? (that was the one with the finger guy. no i don’t mean jonathan banks)
11.4 Spiders in Sheffield
12.6 Praxeus
12.9/10 how did they let chibnall get away with it. isn’t there supposed to be oversight. aren’t there supposed to be safeguards. how did they let him get away with it
13.1 Flux Part 1: The Halloween Apocalypse
13.ii Legend of the Sea Devils
13.3 Flux Part 3: Once, Upon Time
13.iii The Power of the Doctor aka thank fuck, it’s finally over
10.5 Flux Part 5: Survivors of the Flux
10.6 Flux Part 6: Fuck You Chibnall
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top five ace attorney character dynamics!!
Ah! Sorry this took so long to answer I had a LOT to think about and wanted to stick with dynamics that I don't think many people talk about qwq
5. Gumshoe & Larry: This is really only present in the anime and stage plays but GOD I adore it. Dumbass who respects women v. Incel who would win. They're bros and also hate each other.
4. Apollo & Athena: Siblings, Siblings, Siblings, Siblings! The fact that Apollo just walked in on Athena throwing a cop to the ground? What a pair. Strong jock girl and weak nerd who reads horror manga. Not related to their dynamic per say but Apollo literally named his cat Mikeko which literally means some form of "Cat" depending on the source. They are siblings and both enjoy making fun of their dad while fearing their little sister.
3. Mia & Phoenix: The First Turnabout is everything. Phoenix isn't SUPER traumatized yet so it's like. Feenie but more mature and his stressed older sister. I think about the era when Mia was his mentor a LOT, and post Turnabout Sisters their dynamic is so good qwq. Just two stressed older siblings flying by the seat of their pants except Mia is just REALLY good at pretending she's fine while Phoenix is sweating his ass off.
2. Edgeworth & Maya: Edgeworth 🤝 Maya: Bonding over their shared trauma and hyperfixation. Look the anime did some weird things but having Maya yell at Edgeworth about how DL-6 effected her too and him just sitting there being sorry for himself and refusing to help her and Phoenix prove his innicence affected more than just him??? That was good. That was REALLY good actually. Anyways they have a podcast together.
1. Edgeworth & Larry (+Phoenix): Edgeworth and Larry's dynamic is CRIMINALLY underrated. The entire ending of Turnabout Goodbyes is the best thing to ever happen lmao. I think it's great post trilogy too because Phoenix is used to talking shit about people with Edgeworth but then the tables turn and it's just Edgeworth and Larry ganging up on him. Also they're both one centimeter taller than Phoenix and you KNOW they hold that over his head. Also Edgeworth is like "Wow I hate Larry Butz" but like he doesn't?? He has that fondness for Larry that he has for everyone he cares about and I find that very sweet. Again they make fun of Phoenix all the time and no one talks about it qwq.
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just pentagon things
(with links to stuff !!)
this took me so long to make heheh but i hope you like it !! <3
jinho
v o c a l s from the gods
god herself cast her hands upon him and now he has the voice of a million angels
doing ALL the parts in bohemian rhapsody bc of course
HIGH NOTES
grandpa #1
a lil bean :’)
fake maknae
his fluffy bangs during naughty boy era are on the list of my favorite things ever
his cheeks y’all
ok but he looks eerily similar to jiheon from fromis_9 when they smile idk if i’m the only one who sees it but
whenever he does the little wave thingy you know what i’m talking about
he sings in fluent english and it makes my heart flutter every. single. time.
lowkey done with the rest of the members but loves them so much
yuto lifting him up at the end of naughty boy relay dance is basically that one scene from the lion king
tbh the members are always lifting him up and it’s precious
his lil cape during shine
hui
hwitaek in general is just bsidjsbdhdb
such a good leader :’)
i have no talent
mr hwitaek has all the talent
if i’m lucky some of mr hwitaeks talent may rub off on me
i just ?? love him ??!
his piano playing in the gorilla acoustic video makes me weak in the knees
pentagon of leader
y’all remember his twin brother manuel
i play jazz piano and holy shit i could only hope to gain half the talent he has in his hands alone let alone his vOICE
grandpa #2
i have so much appreciation for him and i look up to him a whole lot as a musician i just don’t know how to express my love
critical beauty was his era bitches
constantly being corrected by hongseok
such a groovy ass mf
lee hwitaek vs the english language
he is gorgeous !??!? kills me with his gaze
smile needs more appreciation
he killed it in triple h especially his vocals in 365 fresh
jangjigi jangjigi jang jang jang
hongseok
muscles
ABS :0
‘can i have a bite’ lmao
the group mom
but he’s a cool mom
his eyes are so frickin adorable :’)
absolutely hilarious oh my god
good ass storyteller
two words: his. lips.
his laugh is precious guys like i can’t
this video from the real man
when he shaved his hair off before the real man 300
hongseok x jinho ?? cute as hell
just lovely
such an underappreciated member
i stg whenever he speaks english it’s either to correct somebody, say hi to international fans, or its something completely ridiculous and i love it
e’dawn
y e l l i n g
he and hyuna being a power couple
Y E L L I N G
popping dancing
owned the gorilla era imo
Y E L L I N G
!! tattoos !!
a whole plant dad
his hairstyle suits him so well omg
did i mention yelling
i wish the best for him (and hyuna) and he’ll always be a part of pentagon in our hearts <3
his eyes when he smiles :’))))
video of him yelling in case you don’t know what i’m talking about
also this
I MISS HIM
S U P P O R T H I M or i’m coming for u
also support p nation !!
shinwon
hot shinwon yeah u want ?!
the visual
like the man is a whole model
i kinda just want to sit and have tea with him he seems like that kind of friend
his legs are so underrated
his breathy laugh is amazing
probably slowly losing his patience with the members
when i first got into pentagon i was like hm he seems like the mature one
but none of them are the mature one
booger
VOICE CRACK OF THE CENTURY
we will never forget
it seems like in fanfics he’s always some sort of ceo or manager or fashion designer and i’m here for it
always providing quality content whether he realizes it or not
always providing quality content whether we realize it or not
trying to make food while hui was asleep and then realizing he didn’t have chopsticks
his name is actually shinpon excuse you
absolutely losing his shit during the sha la la don’t smile challenge (13:11)
can you really blame him tho it was funny as hell
screaming + running in fear? shinwon invented that.
yeo one
he cares so much about universe :’)
compilation of him asking universe if we’ve eaten today because he cares
him almost kicking himself in the face that one time i can’t find the video agh
super lovable and wholesome
ok but his teeth
his smile is just so pretty ???
boi is drop dead gorgeous
so pure and just HKSNSBSJS
his asmr videos? yes king
he really expected me to sit there for almost an hour listening to him whisper the members names over and over?
and he was right because i did
yeo one makes me feel the same things i did when i saw bubbles in the air at disney world for the first time
he’s just like that
boyfriend material
HOW DARE I ALMOST FORGET THE SPONGEBOB IMPRESSIONS
saRANGhaeYOoOoo~
the boy is hilarious
yanan
aNNYEONG CHINGUDEUL
he just reminds me of a whole bottle of sprinkles yknow
like if rainbow sprinkles were a person
it’s yanan and yanan only
high note battle with jinho
he’s tol but his voice is smol
“don’t talk with me”
earrings lmao
probably smells like vanilla tbh
‘can you please edit this out?’
he’s literally gonna give me cavities with his sweetness
just from looking at pics of him
i like don’t even know what to say he’s just a ball of sunshine :’)))
so sweet i could put him in my coffee
he deserves so much more that he gets
sUCH A SWEET SOUL UGH~!
i’m running out of ways to reiterate that yanan deserves all the love in the world
y’all better appreciate him or i’m coming for u and ur whole family
he’s just out here chillin, his smile making the world a better place
my uwus? gone. snatched if you will
yuto
it’s ya boy toto
Y U T O D A
him being spooked by ghost stories
cLINGY !!!!!
two words: back. hugs.
i want a yuto hug hmph :((
his laugh is so cute i just-
him being spooked by the dark
NICO NICO NIIII~
his guy-fieri-reminiscent shirt
(you know the one)
him being spooked in general
i will protect this boy with my LIFE
we need more yuto aegyo
but also his visuals make me spontaneously combust
somebody call the fire brigade yknow
when he had the eyebrow slit i cried
im at a loss for how to express my love for adachi yuto
can i have his dangly earrings pls thanks
he’s always feeding everybody it’s so cute
our nagano boy :’)
cough excuse me i had something in my throat i meant our nagano pRINCE
this video of his ‘high note’ and wink never fails to make me laugh
he reminds me of this guy ive had a crush on for a long while ?? like personalitywise they’re oddly similar,, he’s cute n shy but also tall and vv clingy ??? and he recently started doing his hair differently and it’s literally yutos hairstyle i almost stopped breathing ok
also his hugs feel like what i imagine a yuto hug would feel like and i only realized it just now as i’m writing this
kino
he’s my little honeybunch cinnamon apple sugarplum gumdrop babyboy
i just love kang hyunggu a whole lot if you can’t tell by um
the rest of my blog
my profile image
my lockscreen ffs
do i even need to say that he’s my bias
duality? he invented that.
hyunggu being a cutie patootie vs kino being rUDE AS HELL
like he’s a grape juice box and a whole ass bottle of fine wine yknow what i mean
the lace blindfold ?? somebody pinch me
knnovation
i mean have y’all heard voicegasm ??
he did that shit
he’s under arrest for stealing my heart~
(and my uwus)
i don’t even need to say it bc y’all already know but he’s the dance KING
the violet bby
“he’s sensitive”
when hyojong changed the number song lyrics to joke about him being sensitive (2:25)
when he wears big sweaters :’)
i miss his lil ponytail during naughty boy
ppl never talk about this but he’s surprisingly good at languages ?!?
his laugh is one of my favorite sounds on the planet
that one move in can you feel it (01:55 in the mv) gets me every. single. time.
the kino list is long but i just have so much love for this boy
wooseok
he a long boi
HIS DIMPLE
i cant find the vid but there’s this one moment at a fansign or something where he just stepped over the table like it was a completely normal thing to do ?!???!?
HIS FACE IS SO VISUALLY PLEASING
i keep getting shocked over and over about how generally handsome he is
any hair works on him like ??? magic ?!?
screaming during lost paradise
and most songs
and most of the time anyway
i love him lots and lots tho
can pull off the goth look
can pull off the emo look
can pull off any look
he belongs in an opera lmfaooo
E X T R A
BUNNY BUNNY WOOSEOK WOOSEOK
his acrostic poems
i’m a star ? that shit sLAPS
this boy is carrying the entire rap industry on his bACK
i’m sad that i cant think of more stuff for wooseokie
#to make a long story short I love my 10 baby boys a whole lot#nova speaks#pentagon#jinho#hui#hongseok#e'dawn#shinwon#yeo one#yanan#yuto#kino#wooseok#ot10#ptg#long post
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Lo, talk to me about the similarities/differences between this era and the era between Robert's shooting and the abuse era. I agree with you that era is underrated. I love the Sugden fam solidarity (minus Andy), Victoria being a little tigress at defending her brother and standing up to Chas, Robert being a smooth operator at how he tries to warm himself into Aaron's good graces using Doug's hostility. A masterclass in not missing an opportunity.
ohhhhhhh OHHHH WHAT A GREAT THING TO TALK ABOUT
yes ok so the period that robron go through in between robert waking up from the shooting and the abuse era is one of my favourites and highly underrated, because like - it starts off with robert waking up from his coma and being utterly unconvinced that aaron shot him and then him getting aaron out of prison and aaron being THE LEAST GRATEFUL
BUT WE QUICKLY REALISE THAT ROBERT HAS GIVEN UP ON HIS ‘I’M GONNA BE RICH AND POWERFUL AND slutty af FANTASY WITH CHRISSIE and others AND HAS INSTEAD, BY THE POWER OF THE COMA, JUST FUCKING THROWN ALL FEAR TO THE WIND AND ACCEPTED THAT AARON IS IN FACT THE ONE HE WANTS
SO THIS ENTIRE PERIOD IS OF ROBERT UNDERSTANDING THIS, BUT ALSO UNDERSTANDING THAT AARON HAS NEVER HATED ANOTHER HUMAN BEING AS MUCH AS HE CURRENTLY HATES ROBERT, BUT JUST BEING... ENTIRELY UNDETERRED BY THIS
THIS IS ROBERT PRE-UNDERSTANDING HOW TO TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR HIS ACTIONS, SO HE’S OUT THERE LIKE LISTEN AARON I KNOW I KIDNAPPED YOU AND HELD YOU AT GUNPOINT AND THEN SHOT UR STEP DAD A FEW MONTHS AGO BUT WHAT IF I BUY INTO THE PUB AND MOVE IN SO THAT WE CAN RECONNECT AGAIN EH EH
AND SURE YOU MIGHT THINK TO YOURSELF THAT HE’S PROBABLY A TERRIBLE HUMAN, BUT IF HE HADN’T BEEN SO MUCH OF A BRAZEN LITTLE CHANCER WHO WAS OBLIVIOUSLY IN NEED OF SPENDING AS MUCH TIME AS POSSIBLE WITH AARON (AND IF VIC HADN’T ENCOURAGED THIS bc she knows nothing about the lodge bless her she just knows that her brother is in love) THEN HE NEVER WOULD HAVE GOT TO AARON TO BE ABLE TO TAKE HIM TO THE HOSPITAL WHEN HE COLLAPSED SO
IT ALL WORKS OUT FOR THE BEST
ROB’S INSANITY SAVES LIVES sometimes
(AND THEN THE ABUSE ERA STARTS UP AND ROBERT IS THROWN INTO THIS SITUATION WHERE HE HAS TO STEP UP AND STOP THINKING ABOUT WHAT HE WANTS AND FOCUS ON WHAT AARON NEEDS AND HE DOES THAT AND I’M ALWAYS V PROUD OF HIM FOR IT
AND TBH I KNOW HE DOES SOME STUPID THINGS IN THAT ERA BUT I DON’T FAULT HIM FOR ANY OF IT HE’S DOING HIS BEST AND I LOVE AND SUPPORT HIM THROUGH EVERYTHING AND I WON’T HEAR A BAD WORD SAID AGAINST HIM
HE STEPPED UP)
BUT ANYWAY, present day we find ourselves once more in a period between robert fucking up and the two of them getting back together. the difference now is that rob has grown as a person immeasurable amounts. he’s literally decided to accept responsibility for what he’s done and he respects that aaron wants to move on and honestly their relationship was so much deeper this time around - just as tumultuous but absolutely happier, really, than the affair era. they wanted to spend their lives together and now they’re in a place where they both think that they can’t and so it’s all v sad
BUT LIKE
OBVS
IF THEY BOTH GO ON THINKING THAT WAY THEY’RE NEVER GONNA GET BACK TOGETHER THEN NO ONE IS EVER GONNA MAKE A MOVE
SO
SOMETHING HAS TO CHANGE
AND I THINK WE KNOW THAT THERE’S NO WAY IT CAN FEASIBLY BE ROBERT, WITHOUT THE SHOW UNPICKING EVERYTHING THEY DID WITH HIM AT CHRISTMAS AND SINCE THEN
SO NOW... NOW WE HAVE AARON BEING THE ONE WHO JUST WANTS TO SPEND TIME WITH ROBERT even though he has a boyfriend AND ROBERT KEEPING HIM COMPLETELY AT ARM’S LENGTH
AND TBH I’M V CURIOUS TO SEE WHERE IT GOES FROM HERE
BC HONESTLY THEIR ENTIRE FUTURE RELIES ON AARON THROWING CAUTION TO THE WIND, ACCEPTING THAT ROB IS THE PERSON HE WANTS TO SPEND HIS LIFE WITH AND GOING AFTER WHAT HE WANTS
i’m here 4 it
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Sleeping Beauty: Slept On!
Another week, another princess adventure. This one I spent with a particular friend...
That's right, I watched Sleeping Beauty this week. This image does not in any way reflect how I felt about the film, but it has been crazy at work so I did conk out for a while before starting it.
Sleeping Beauty is an anomaly of a Princess film, in the way that its villain is vastly more popular than its title princess. I guess it makes sense since Aurora has a personality befitting a discarded Amazon box. Literally, there aren't a lot of character traits about Aurora that aren't shared by the princesses who came before her. She's...kind. Pretty. Fairly submissive. Oh, yeah, and white. Still, Aurora is beloved as an original Disney Princess, just like Snow White and Cinderella before her. And still arguably one of the most beautiful. Okay, that was just me talking, I think.
So now we can finally actually talk about Sleeping Beauty.
Sleeping Beauty is based on the classic fairytale of a princess (in this adaptation, called Aurora), cursed at birth to a deathlike slumber by a wicked fairy (in this adaptation, called Maleficent). She lives in the forest as Briar Rose with three fairy godmothers--Flora, Fauna, and Merryweather--who raise her until her sixteenth birthday. The curse is said to prick her finger on a spinning wheel's needle on the day of her sixteenth birthday, but while Maleficent ordered her to die from it, Merryweather comes in clutch and adjusts the curse (when will your fae?) so that she merely falls asleep, to be awakened by True Love's Kiss (sounds familiar). She's saved by a prince, there's a dragon, yadda yadda yadda, make it pink, make it blue, happily ever after.
This film also borrows its score from that of the Sleeping Beauty ballet by Pyotr Ilych Tchaikovsky, which means it automatically wins. Menken and Giacchino, I still love you.
The good:
-Aurora still manages to be just a bit rebellious despite being one of the early ones. She, like Ariel thirty years later, hopes to marry this man she just met in the woods, and gushes to her fairy godmothers about him, none of them knowing he is Prince Philip, the one set up in this fancy arranged marriage their parents set up for them. This is about to get awkward. Still, Aurora knows what she wants, and no arrange marriage is gonna stop that, until she realizes she's being arranged to marry the guy she wanted to anyway. Life comes at you fast.
-The humor in this film is actually the best of the classic era. The Skumps scene with Philip and Aurora's fathers is pure debauchery, but it's the bard who steals the show by slipping their alcohol into his lyre and just getting hilariously drunk...and staying that way throughout the film. He gives a new meaning to the phrase "drinking under the table." The fairies also are a comedy show in themselves, as they're all just plain dumb without magic.
-Speaking of fairies, can we just put a good thought in for Merryweather? She has to adjust the Awesome Gift she has for baby Aurora because Maleficent just ordered to have her killed. Hatchimals will just have to wait until next year. Not only that, but she always has to be the one to remind her sisters to not use magic, should Aurora find out what her godmothers are. And then she is the one whose bright idea it is to make Aurora's dress blue, but she is far more recognized in her pink dress. Long story short, Merryweather has been through it. (By the way, the fairies are the ONLY reason this film passes the Bechdel test, though it is not the first Princess film to do so--Cinderella holds that honor.)
-Prince Philip so far rules the Most Useful Prince title, for slaying a dragon and awakening Aurora with the good old TLK. Great job, Philip, for being a standard prince.
-M A L E F I C E N T. Let's be real, Maleficent stole the ENTIRE show. The very definition of petty with a face beat for the gods, and, oh, I don't know, All The Powers of Hell! No other Disney villain can claim a pact with Satan! When will Ursula ever? There is a good reason why she is synonymous with Disney villains, and so far, the only villain with a solo film to her name. Iconic doesn't even begin to describe. (Also, that monologue she gives to captive Prince Philip is purely sinister. I love a wicked woman.) Maleficent is also the only example of woman hating other women, and being hated by other women. To be fair...she is despicable. Yet, still, I love her...
And then there's the not-so-good.
-You know that trope you hate about princesses where they're all damsels in distress and have to be rescued by a prince? This is that movie. This is that trope. Aurora is the damsel, put to sleep by a wicked curse, and Philip--Mr. Right Place Right Time--breaks it, slays the dragon, marries the princess, happily ever after. All this time you have been blaming every princess for this trope when, in reality, it's only a few, with this one being one of the worst offenders.
-Are arranged marriages still a thing? I think they are. Kill them with the rage of a burning black hell dragon. It slides in this era because era but the fact that it still happens in other countries to this day is just unbelievable, honestly.
-How did Disney get away with such heavy alcohol consumption in a kids' movie? Not that I care that much, personally, I'm just wondering.
-On one hand, the dress could have stayed blue, because gendered coloring blah blah, but I think they started using Aurora's pink dress when the Princess franchise came into being in the 90s, to differentiate Aurora from Cinderella (EVEN THOUGH HER DRESS IS SILVER). And I guess Tiana later on, even though her green lilypad dress seems to be her signature look. I don't know, I guess it was either her or Ariel. I really just wanted Merryweather to have SOMETHING in the end.
-A lot of emphasis on beauty in this film as well as the ones before it, but you can tell that the company is v e r y s l o w l y moving away from this concept.
Final thoughts: Sleeping Beauty is just a few steps backward, but you know how it is with things like this. Baby steps and all. This film practically patented the damsel-in-distress trope, and perfected it to a science. Tchaikovsky, a horned witch, and some rabble-rousing fairies could not save this film from that, but oh, do they make it enjoyable. Out of the classic era, this one truly shines, and is severely underrated. There isn't a lot else to be gleaned from it, other than to be careful around needles. (Fun fact: I didn't watch this movie until I was 20, because I never watched it as a kid. My mother didn't want me to develop a fear of pricking my finger. Now, at age 27, I still have no piercings or tattoos for that very reason, so suck it, Mom.)
Rating: 3.5 out of 5 drunk bards
Thanks for joining me for this installment of the Princess Party. In my next installment, I will have to painfully criticize my favorite film of all time--1989's The Little Mermaid. Join me as I resist progressiveness in the name of defending my problematic fave! Until then, Dream Big, Princess!
#disney#disney princess#sleeping beauty#princess aurora#aurora#in which alex discovers gifs and time travel
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Manchester City host Chelsea this weekend and will be hoping to continue their comeback from a 2-1 loss to Newcastle in January. Having won their last two, City are back on track and have capitalised on their title rivals, Liverpool, dropping seven points from their last five games, thus surrendering a seven-point lead they held at Christmas.
Now level on 62 points, City will be cheering on Bournemouth on Saturday, who visit Anfield. Then the onus is on the champions to get a win against the Blues – who inflicted their first defeat of the Premier League season in December – and keep their seat at the top of the table.
This week’s chosen fans, Digital Sport editor and Manchester City fan Chris McMullan and Chelsea-mad TT assistant editor George Blake, offer their predictions ahead of the huge clash…
Bernardo Silva played at centre-mid in the absence of Kevin de Bruyne earlier in the season but is now back on the wing. Have City missed his energy in the middle of the park at times?
Chris: “I think City have lacked energy full stop in the last few games. Scoring early – arguably too early in hindsight – against Newcastle seemed to have a tranquilising effect on the team whilst against Arsenal and Everton, the Blues came through but without a certain verve.
“Would moving Bernardo back into the middle help in that regard? I’m not so sure – the fact that City are in a title race should focus minds, and De Bruyne’s slow return to form should help, too. Perhaps the more salient point is whether Bernardo’s lack of pace and directness in comparison with Raheem Sterling and Leroy Sane is a factor in City’s overall lethargy.”
George: “I think you could argue that pushing Bernardo out wide does make life more difficult for City, in that they have less energy in the middle of the park, but the tradeoff is having De Bruyne in there instead. Nobody in the Premier League can pass quite like the Belgian, and let’s not forget, he was the heartbeat of this team prior to his recent run of injuries.
“In truth, it’s more of a win/win situation for Pep Guardiola, as though he may lose something in moving Silva out, he’s gaining a whole lot more by being able to include De Bruyne. And Bernardo isn’t ineffective on the flanks, either, so it’s still working for City. I wouldn’t be surprised to see the pair get better in the coming weeks with more time playing in their respective positions.”
An unlikely engine in the City side, the former Monaco man was used alongside the other Silva in Guardiola’s midfield as De Bruyne recovered from a knee injury and impressed, but since the Belgian’s return, he has been shifted back out to the wing.
De Bruyne can do things with a football that no other Premier League player can and, as indispensable as he and David Silva are, one wonders if they have missed Bernardo’s legs in the middle.
The 24-year-old broke the season record – previously held by himself – for ground covered in City’s 2-1 victory over Liverpool, clocking an incredible 13.7km. Chelsea have a similar workhorse in their midfield…
N’Golo Kante has – controversially – been deployed further forward by Maurizio Sarri this season. Do City have to worry about him when he gets on the ball as much as when he’s off it?
George: “A lot has been made about the positional change for N’Golo Kante, but as a Chelsea fan I just don’t see it. There’s been this strange discourse surrounding Kante’s importance to the team, and it flipflops on a week to week basis. If he plays poorly, suddenly Sarri is the devil, but if he plays well, it’s a bit of genius from the Italian.
“The reality is that Kante suits the position well. He’s still able to impact the game defensively, but he’s also able to make use of his other traits, like his great passing range, to make an impact going forward, as he did with Gonzalo Higuain’s first goal last weekend. I read somewhere that he’s got three goals in his last 25 games, whereas Mateo Kovacic has scored one in his last 95 games. I think that tells you all you need to know about which player is playing too far forward.”
Chris: “Jurgen Klopp used to claim his gegenpressing style was his best playmaker and winning the ball deep into the opposition’s half is about as dangerous an opportunity as you could wish for. The attacking team is turned on the back foot in an instant and the defenders who’d been set up to attack are now in no position to defend.
“While it’s true that Kante has a peculiar knack of dribbling the ball 20 yards without succumbing to a challenge and is particularly hard to knock off the ball when he has it thanks to his low centre of gravity, it’s his ball-winning abilities in City’s defensive third rather than his ball-carrying ones that Guardiola will have to worry about.”
Kante showed excellent vision to spot Higuain’s near-post run against Huddersfield and this was far from a one-off. The World Cup winning defensive midfielder has been ousted from that role by Sarri’s golden boy, Jorginho.
The Frenchman’s tireless running is hugely important to his side and the more he plays in his new position, the more he will improve. While what Sarri is doing with Kante might not please some Blues fans, it will make Kante far more well-rounded and who knows what kind of beast he could become in the next few years.
While the aforementioned midfield duo are shoe-ins in the Chelsea XI, it is far less certain as to who will occupy the right-wing slot…
If you’re Aymeric Laporte, playing left-back for City, who would you rather face out of Willian and Pedro?
Chris: “‘Would you rathers’ are rarely nice….
“This one, however, isn’t as horrible as it could’ve been thanks to the fact that Eden Hazard plays on the left for Chelsea. That doesn’t mean that he won’t drift, of course.
“If I were Laporte, I think i’d prefer to come up against Willian just because Pedro’s pace is a little greater and the Brazilian is less likely to want to beat you on the outside.
“Having said that, I do believe Willian is the player Guardiola will fear most because of his propensity to conjure something out of nothing, particularly from set pieces, and for the greater good you’d like to think Laporte would prefer to see Pedro lining up on the opposite side of the halfway line at kick-off.”
George: “I know I’d rather be facing Willian. I think he is unfairly criticised for his contributions, as he’s a crucial part of the team and is very underrated – but as a defender you know exactly what to expect from him. He’s either going to pass it sideways or he’s going to go on the outside and cross the ball.
“Pedro, meanwhile, is more dynamic and can cut in or go out or pass around you. I think Pedro’s been a bit of a secret weapon for the Blues this season, and he’s always a goal threat.”
Sarri, though, seems to prefer the Brazilian to Pedro – former Shakhtar man Willian has made 21 league starts to the Spaniard’s 14. Both got the nod last time the two top six sides met as Hazard stepped into a false-nine role, although, with the arrival of Gonzalo Higuain, there will surely only be room for one of the wide-men this time around.
They will have another opportunity to test their qualities against the champions this month though…
How important is it, psychologically, for both teams to get three points from this game considering that the Carabao Cup final is just around the corner?
George: “I think for Chelsea it goes beyond just the Carabao Cup. Another big loss and we’re back at the stage we were after Bournemouth. However, if we win – and Higuain scores again – we’ll be looking a whole lot better.
“We’ve already proven that we can beat City, and so I don’t think that’s overly important, but it’s just about whether we can sustain a run of form leading into that fixture and beyond.”
Chris: “Top six encounters are huge games in the season these days and you could go as far as to say era defining, too. At the Etihad Stadium around this time last year Antonio Conte’s Chelsea surrendered meekly and that display as much as anything else may have cost the Italian his credibility.
“This time around, if Chelsea were to win, it could be era defining for Guardiola because, although his 100-point season is unlikely to be beaten, defeat here and in the Carabao Cup final could see his side unravel. Victories on an unstoppable march to multiple trophies would see this period of the year burnish the legend further and ensure that he and his team go down as one of English football’s greats.
Having bested City last time out, Chelsea know that they’ve got another upset in them and they will go into the cup final with that knowledge regardless of Sunday’s result. For the Cityzens, though, a loss could sow some major doubts in the minds of the players, who will be faced with the prospect of their quadruple hopes crashing down going into the clash on 24th February.
Finally, what are your score predictions?
Chris: “On this week’s FIFpod I said 3-0 to Manchester City and – despite the fact I may now regret that hubris – I’m going to have to stick to it.”
George: “This is a rare game in that if we lost I wouldn’t be too heartbroken, as I really don’t want to see Liverpool at the top of the Premier League, but it’s important that we get a good result so we stay ahead of the likes of Man Utd and Arsenal. I’m going to go for 3-2 Chelsea.”
Who will be the next ‘Big 6’ manager to be sacked? The Pl>ymaker FC squad all seem to agree on one name. Find out who in the video below…
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