#u guys......... i will. draw monster!kuroo | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

dinosaurtsukki · 4 years

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kuroo tetsurou + crack alphabet hc’s (A-Z)

A - Alphabet. Do they actually know their abc's in order? Or do they have to sing the whole song to remember?

not only does he MEMORIZE the alphabet (big brain energy over here) he even has a good handle on how the letters are organized on those old, nokia phone keypads because he still owns a nokia phone

B - Boyband. Any boybands that they’re secretly or not secretly a fan of?

he says he’s a fan of the Backstreet Boys but he only listens to ‘I Want it That Way’. once, he was talking to an Actual Fan and they asked him if they liked a particular album and kuroo just panicked and yelled ‘tELL ME WHY’

C - Crocs. Would they wear them? What kind would they wear?

wears them for the specific reason that people hate them. he’ll take aesthetic ootd pics of him in leather jackets and tight jeans with thE UGLIEST PAIR OF CROCS YOU’VE EVER SEEN. he’ll even put his feet up in class to show of his ‘bad boys’

D - Dream. The weirdest, most disturbing dream that they had.

he once dreamt that he was short, shorter than hinata, and playing during Nationals. kenma set the ball to him and when kuroo was about to jump, he realized that the volleyball was actually a pokeball. he woke up screaming and crying about the pokeball being a void of nothingness.

E - Existential Crisis. What caused it? What do they do during this crisis?

it happened during his first day studying biochemistry. the professor put up a documentary about the origins of life. kuroo stood up in the middle of the class and said ‘everything’s?? chemicals??’ and left, looking absolutely distraught

F - Fried. A cooking disaster that they somehow caused.

it was an honest mistake of accidentally rubbing his eyes while chopping chilies. kenma walked in on kuroo with his face dunked in a bowl of milk and said ‘ew, you put the milk first?’

G - Good Morning. What actually wakes them up in the morning?

their Limited Edition Spongebob Squarepants wristwatch that he got in a mcdonald’s happy meal when he was ten

H - Height. What i think their actual height should be.

*looks up appx. thickness of paper money*

*looks up kuroo’s height*

*does math*

his height is $17,210 dollars

I - ...Interesting. Something they came across on the internet that made them delve into a bit too deeply.

he was looking up funny halloween costumes to send as gag gifts to bokuto and kenma and after more than a few clicks, he came across ‘sexy sesame street costumes’ and hasn’t looked at cookie monster the same ever again

J - Joker. I pick one of the weird, out-of-context images I have saved on my phone to describe them.

K - Karaoke. How they act in a karaoke bar.

he doesn’t give the songbook a second glance and keys ‘8008185′ in the machine and sings whichever song comes up. kenma shakes his head at him in the background.

L - Liquor. The dumbest thing they did when they got drunk

this guy was day-drinking and decided to take his binoculars (HE DOESN’T USE IT FOR THAT HE JUST THINKS THEY LOOK COOL) and stare directly at the sun

M - Math. Are they absolute brain lords at math or do they use calculators for basic addition?

his Big Brain is very good for multi-purpose use. he actually plays with his calculator after he finishes his exams. you think he’s checking his answers? no, he’s trying to make a cat face.

N - Neurons. How many brain cells do they actually have?

he has a fuck ton of brain cells and they’re always having an orgy so he experiences critical thinking 24/7

O - Oops. Their brain cells didn't quite connect and they ended up doing this.

okay, maybe the orgy doesn’t happen 24/7. during his small lapse in judgement, kuroo accidentally sent his professor his shopping list that was full of Items he and bokuto were using for a prank (his professor ended up recommending him a better brand of shaving cream)

P - Pictionary. How would they do in a Pictionary game?

the only things he can draw well are diagrams of molecules. he’ll fill the paper or board with hexagons and lines before anyone could guess that he’s drawing a chocolate-chip cookie

Q - Quote. What quote would they have on their yearbooks?

“my hair doesn’t fit in the frame, does it?” - kuroo tetsurou

R - Repeat. What song is on repeat in their heads 100% of the time?

The Periodic Table Song

S - Soccer. As volleyball players, how well would they fare in a soccer game? (Also, would they even call it soccer??)

kuroo actually mixed up american football and soccer. the soccer ball would be sailing at him at full speed and kuroo will just be mesmerized about how an entire spherical surface could be filled with black and white hexagons

T - Twilight. What did they do during their Twilight phase?

kuroo’s tumblr blog when he was 13:

one day, jacob brouhgt u to the doctor for ur surjery. ‘jacob, im scared’ u looked at him with tears in ur eyes. ‘dont be scared, i will be here after’ he told u, staring at ur e/c orbs. u went to the surjery and then came out. ‘jacob where are u?’ u said. the doctor looked at u sadly. ‘who do u think gave u ur heart?’

U - Until now... What did they not know until now?

that Hollywood is not a US state

V - Video. Someone took a video of them doing this to blackmail them. What was it?

him slicking his hair down in front of the mirror just to see how he would look like with slicked-down hair

W - Wake me up. Are they a ‘wake me up inside’, ‘before you go go’, or ‘when september ends’ kind of person?

WAKE ME UP BEFORE YOU GO GO

X - X marks the spot. Which spot are they ticklish?

his kneecaps. like, just run your fingernails over them and he’ll slap your hand away

Y - You're/Your. Are they a grammar nazi? How do they type their messages when talking to people online/making posts?

he’ll misspell things and the only punctuation he’d use are exclamation points just to piss off whoever he’s talking to and see just how far he could take things

Z - Zoinks. Weird catchphrase that their friends remember them for.

“it started out with a fish, how did it end up like this?”

taglist that i forgot to add lskjga (still open to anyone who wants in!): @montys-chaos @miyumtwins @strawberriimilkshake @pocubo @sugawara-sweetheart@akaashisbabydoll @laure-chan@therainroguefanfiction@atetiffdoesart@stephdaninja@oikaw-ugh @charliefredb @dramaqueenweeb1469@tremblinghearts @applepienation @doodleniella

#haikyuu!!#kuroo tetsurou #kuroo crack alphabet hc's #haikyuu!! crack alphabet #haikyuu!! headcanons #kuroo

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