#two big tiddy dilfs.....i am just a girl | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

mccoys-killer-queen · 2 years

Text

Seeing Faster Pussycat/LA Guns/Tom Keifer Band in concert:

if you follow me on insta you know a LOT happened last night xD this is going to be a VERY long post I can just feel it. I gotta try and sort out my copious thoughts mixed in with all the events so we're gonna TRY doing this in chronological order:

*deep breath*

when I first got there 5 hours before showtime, I went inside to use the bathroom. Now this venue is relatively small, and they have a small restaurant upstairs (those are the bathrooms you have to use prior to doors). I went upstairs and I heard Tom soundchecking from there :o he was playing Don't Know What You Got (Til It's Gone) and it was making the room shake it was the greatest piss of my life

I was the 4th person in the general admission line and I was with these two guys, one of whom had a RAD hysteria tat and said I have Joe's (pyromania) haircut

this guy offered me free beer

one of these three people in front of me ended up being my "concert friend" (I'll refer to her as Robin) bc we talked so much and she's old enough to be my mom

Robin and the other two guys in front of me had VIP packages to see LA Guns' soundcheck so they left and I was first in line until only Robin came back

Slim Tender actually passed in front of us in line hours before doors opened but none of us really realized it was him

I got my photo pass and got in like 10 minutes before everyone else!! I ended up being front row at the barrier to stage left

Faster Pussycat's rhythm guitarist (Ronnie Simmons) gave me big Steve Clark vibes bc he's a skinny white boy with long hair who looked shy, did air split jumps while playing, and just in general felt Steve-y

Sam Bam is incredible and adorable just saying and FP sounded awesome like Taime sounds exactly the same as he did 30 years ago

They stole the fucking show I swear to god the night peaked with them imo

Phil was wearing a mesh tank top with a bandana and feathered hat he looked like a granddad trying too hard to be a pirate and the curly ass mustache didn't help

Phil looks like his 80s self is pretending to be old

Due to personal reasons I am now in love with Phil Lewis

he was dancing like a total dork it drove me insane I couldn't get enough

His speaking voice is so high???

Phil grabbed his left tiddy like twice during their set

guys I SWEAR I saw a tramp stamp on him with my own two eyes I SWEAR I saw it you gotta believe me

Phil pointing at my camera during the first fucking song and me not getting the shot ;-;

Phil replacing random lyrics with the words "Tracii Guns" (i.e. "nowww Tracii's breaking hearts in heaven")

Phil giving a speech about Tracii during Jayne and saying how he's been his best friend for over 30 years and how "no man has ever touched me like he has-"

Tracii: *pokes Phil's shoulder* C:

Phil: "-and I LIKED it"

Tracii: *pokes Phil's boob* C:

Ace apparently pulled his groin early in their set (I was on Tracii's side so I didn't see- I will elaborate more on this later)

since I was on the side of the stage with the exit, that meant the drinks were there too, so every time Tracii went into a solo, Phil would come over and would almost always interact with me and the teenage girls next to me

at one point I took advantage of this and I blew a kiss at him when he was in front of me, to which he went :O and slapped his cheek to show he "caught" it and I went fuckin ballistic

at the end of their set Phil grabbed one of Tracii's picks and crouched down in front of me and threw it to me (I CAUGHT IT)

was anyone going to tell me Tracii Guns is a dilf or-

I literally thought Johnny Martin was a woman the whole time- like I KNEW it had to be him but I was seriously second guessing myself because he just- he was in glasses and a scarf and a hat and he haS A VERY FEMININE BUILD

Phil saying he's happy to be "on top of this beautiful mountain again" (the venue is on top of a mountain) and it's so weird bc like ? this is just where I live? and he likes it? HE likes it??

apparently Phil complemented a girl on her tits during the show (she was showing a lot on purpose and bouncing a lot and he just kinda motioned bouncing tits with his hands and nodded- I'M TOLD- I didn't actually see any of this. Robin told me afterwards)

LA Guns stole the show I stg I had no idea how Tom was gonna top that it was the peak of my night

Tom was ethereal just saying he sounds T H E E. S A M E. HAS HE DID ON NIGHT SONGS.

Tom's knee high boots and tight pants hell yeah

Tom wasn't really playing with the crowd that much but he did slightly acknowledge me during Shelter Me by just kinda looking at me and singing

He played much more Cinderella than I expected I was LIVING

Tom saying we (him and the crowd) are basically related bc we're all from PA. So from this point onward I am related to Tom Keifer I didn't make these rules he said it himself

Tom during Nobody's Fool going "I SCREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMMMM- *falls to his knees*" a capella, letting his voice absolutely shudder the whole building, and holding it forever and everyone going nuts what a fucking god

Tom betting we knew every word to Nobody's Fool which we DID

his playing just seems so smooth????

his wife Savannah being on backing vocals and them doing Don't Know What You Got (Til It's Gone) together was really cute ;-;

Before they did that Tom told us to "show him some Pennsylvania stars" (aka put our lights on during the song)

the stars actually coming out in the sky after the show ;-; <3

they did Long Cold Winter as an encore and I was dissociating thee whole fucking time so badly because I was THAT exhausted- like I didn't even recognize the song until the very end I was that out of it. I didn't have anything to drink- alcohol or not.

someone was holding a very good drawing they did of him and his wife the whole time and at the end of the set one of the roadies took it from her and brought it back, and came out a minute later asking if she wanted it back, to which she said they could keep it. SO yeah Tom and Savannah kept a fan's drawing of them ;-; <3

Tom's hair is still godly

I also never knew he has a nice butt 👌 and legs

When Tom was recording the video of the crowd he put on his insta he was like "hold on I gotta I make sure I recorded bc the other night I fucked it up and didn't get it..."

"...I GOT IT" *audience cheers bc yay Tom knows how to use a phone good for u honey we're proud*

Okay that's JUST from the show. Now here's where it gets crazy.

#IT LITERALLY WON'T LET ME TYPE ANY MORE #LIKE EVERY TIME I TRY TO TYPE MORE THE SAVE BUTTON DISAPPEARS #TBC in part 2: what happened AFTER the concert #this post gave tumblr whiplash #guys I literally have hundreds of photos to go through and that is NOT an exaggeration #i have 130 photos on my camera ALONE #that's not even counting what I took on my phone #concerts #la guns #tom keifer #faster pussycat #concert log #concert diary

5 notes · View notes

boingolungs · 1 year

Text

Study week is coming and I generally like to type a whole summary at the end of the semester when one ends. Holy Fuck I've been at home most of this semester. Like the amount of times I've actually went to my Uni is either at the single digits or barely past the double digits. So yeah. I wonder if it wasnt for the pandemic how often would I actually be at school. I asked my sister and she just said that I probably would've been there a whole lot. So yeah Fuck. Anyway as an art major looking back I made more shit I like I did this semester compared to last. Which I would probably upload images of but no. I keep my Uni art away from my big tiddy Tumblr Twitter art. Which I haven't done in a while but I'll get back on the horse. Soooo...... A painting I did do that I really liked is this weird nun painting and honestly...

Imma make a big tiddy spooky nun! If the good ol book is telling the truth I'm probably going to hell but considering how I like cute guys and scary chicks I'm probably going to hell either way so that's groovy.

So now I only have two semesters of uni left. It would be one but the art higher ups like to fuck over students so a class that is required that I haven't taken yet is only on during the fall semester. So I'm just gonna be getting as much credits I need this semester and finish up the last class next semester. And then I'll probably get a job for some experience.

Who knows maybe the winds push me a different way and I'll be married to a rich older woman (still like milfs) and live a comfortable life or a cute dude whose is a hard worker. I didn't say dilf cause I don't like dilfs. Hell who knows maybe I'll be a vtuber or get back into IT. (I hated IT)

But let's get a bit existential since like only two mutuals will read this also hey love you and appreciate you homie! Are you ok I hope you are. Anyway the existential dread I wanna hop onto for awhile. Not what happens when I die but more so do you ever wonder what happens to where you live in the next 10 years? Now I'm not talking about family I'm talking about landscape and environmental shit because holly balls to the walls when the city you live in is extremely reliant on a lake that is drying up and you live in a desert. Boy howdy are you fucked! Because the lake I live next to or too is gonna be gone in the next 10 years. Which bring some to this. Where would I go? Who would I be by that time? Will I still be the guy I am? Or maybe something new?

And you know what the answer to all those questions are. Who fuckin knows.

Right now however you know what I'm thinking about?

THIS FUCKING BITCH WHO IVE BEEN TRYING TO SUMMON GOD DAMMNIT FIRST THEY DIDNT GIVE RAIKO, THEY DIDNT GIVE ME VAN GOGH, THEY DIDNT GIVE ME, RAIKOU AGAIN, AND THEY DIDNT GIVE ME A COSMIC HORROR GIRL, AND THEY WONT GIVE ME THIS SNAKE BITCH GOD FUCKING DAMNIT JUST GIVE ME THE SNAKE BITCH HAVE PITTY ON ME IVE BEEN GETTING SERVANTS I DONT FUCKING WANT LIKE COME THE FUCK ON JUST GIVE ME THE SNAKE BITCH IM NOT SINKING MONEY INTO FGO SHES THE ONLY SERVANT I WANT FOR A GOOD WHILE COME THE FUCK ON I BLAME MY WEIRD FUCKING LUCK FOR NOT GETTING HER I SWEAR TO GOD AN I GOT COCK TEASED BY SUMMONG A GOLDEN CARD SABER WHO WASNT FUCKING IBUKI DOUJI AKA SNAKE BITCH INSTEAD I GOT SOME SABER FACE I COMPLETELY FORGOT ABOUT JUST GIVE ME THE SNAKE BITCH

Also it turns out I haven't been eating Philadelphia sandwiches I've just been eating fajita burgers with cheese

#i hate fate grand order #if it wasn't for Scherezade i would've quit #also fuck you i love Scherezade #fgo

0 notes

bakuvantea · 3 years

Note

HEY BESTIE I HOPE YOUR HAVING AN AMAZING DAY

CAN I GET SOME GENERAL HEADCANONS WITH SUNG JIN-WOO WITH A FEMALE S/O

FEEL FREE TO IGNORE BUT REMEMBER TO TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF

>:)

general relationship headcanons of sung jin-woo with his beloved s/o

- warnings: none! just a tad bit of nsfw implications

- audience: I made this gender neutral, i do hope that’s okay!!

- a/n: hello >:) anonnn (may i call u that? lmao-) here’s your request love!! thank you for your kind words <33 stay heathy, stay hydrated, and always rest up okay? hope you have an amazing day ahead too!!

also idk who jacob is-

-•-

: pre-awakened jin-woo (before entering the carthenon temple)

> he was always cautious, he didn't want [you] to hear the whispers going around about how you could've chosen someone better, about how you could've loved someone that was not him. thus, he was very shy and timid, always on edge when he feels the piercing stares from his batchmates -most especially when you try to initiate physical contact with him in your school or in public, you'd see him uncomfortable and so you'd immediately stop (because you respect him, ily). behind closed doors though he would always go above and beyond in pleasing you and making you feel loved, although he always doubts himself so you always make sure to give him praises and assure him that he is the one you love (not that jerk jacob from the class next door).

> he always wears spare hair ties or hair pins around his wrists in case you forget or lose yours. in fact when its weekends -and when he's not out infiltrating dungeons and positively offering his life on a silver platter- he always tries to study new hairdos and hairstyles so he can have more variations and choices when he ties or pins your hair for you. he'd always kiss the top of your head after and you'd feel his smile as he nuzzles your hair, smelling your shampoo. since his hair is also long, you'd also return the favor and tie his hair for him. his favorite would have to be the classic apple look with a pointy lock of hair erect in the middle -he really looks like a shih tzu, adorable-

> he.blushes.so.easily !!! he is very weak to praises and your lil kisses that pepper his face. you can see him glow and you even see his smile evidently becoming wider despite him shying away from you, looking downwards to avoid your loving gaze.

> he may be sht but he is also very playful towards you, teasing you and throwing pillows at you when you’re in his room, what a baby.

> often during dates he'd always need to leave early because he really needs to earn money and g to the dungeons. although you try to offer him some of your savings or your help during the dungeon raids, he'd always reject your offer, thinking of how it may burden you or the dungeon raids may possibly hurt you. you don't listen to him though, you give some of your savings to his sister when you cross paths in your school, and you'd always register after him in raids or call up someone you know to have you join in.

"(name) why are you here?!"

"angel face, i can handle myself just fine. it's my choice to help you and whether you like it or not, i've also been called for this raid. come love, we're going in."

> you'd always take his blue hoodie and wear it. he gets so shy when you smell it.

he gets frantic when you take his hoodie and start sniffing it, exclaiming; "stop! i smell weird."

you raise an eyebrow at him, "woo, you smell fine. i like it."

he tries to stutter a remark but was silenced by your smile.

> you always try to visit his mother with him and his sister, jinah. you always talk to their mother out loud and you'd see jinah smile gently at you and jin-woo trying to stop sniffles from escaping his lips by biting them and covering his face with his hoodie.

jinah: u simp

jin-woo: shut it

> he loved cuddles! but he really likes kissing your cheeks. he loves how soft they are and he loves feeling your cheeks move when you smile or laugh at his cute antics.

> he loves you so so dear

: post-awakened jin-woo (after the events of the carthenon temple)

> oh, dear it's the monarch-

> you weren't with him when he raided the "d-rank" dungeon that then turned out to be,, well pretty much a bloodbath, so you were very worried when you heard word of the news. you and jinah basically ran to the hospital and when you caught sight of him you almost fell down from relief and pure shock in seeing the state he's in. well, not long after though suddenly he's all buff and you were really trying to make sense of what's happening.

you: hello there good sir, what in the name of fck are you doing in my boyfriend’s room all sweaty and half-naked😀

jin-woo: (name) it’s me

you: haha yes, sir ‘it’s me’ that’s a pretty weird name but i don't judge, anyways my baby boy is not here uhm haha please get out of my boyfriend’s room

jin-woo: (name) it’s really me!

you: no sir, my woo radiates baby energy, you on the other hand radiates big dilf energy, haha i do not like what i am sensing so please for the life of me leave-

(jinah had to convince you that it is indeed jin-woo, you had her stop you from trying to hold his tiddies)

> you were very happy in seeing how confident he’s become, and you were even more proud with how he still says so humble despite his new accomplishments and title.

> it was obvious that he has become distant with others and have set a boundary between him and other hunters, you accept that part of him though since you know just how much he has gone through. he may act aloof towards others but he’s still very playful and comfortable with you.

> you have also noticed another thing though, he has become a bit possessive or much protective over you and jinah. he’d always have you bring a shadow with you to guard you when he can’t be with you. also, when someone stares at you for far too long, he’d step in and go, “hey there pal” and oh gosh was that enough to get the guy running (pretty damn hot)

> you still visit his mom with him, he doesn’t cry now though.

> when he trains, you’d insist on lying down below him when he does push-ups. you’d kiss him every time he swoops down and you’d hear him laugh which then makes you giggle as you hold his cheeks between your hands

> jinah is sick of the two you, always screaming about how on earth did her brother get an s/o before her, the audacity!

> his shadows adore you, of they’d always try to impress you or get head pats when you tell jin-woo to summon them for you. you live them to bits and always thanks them for a job well done in helping jin-woo with his raids. on the first time you accompanied him for a raid -you had to bribe him with more cuddles- and you were shocked with how his sweet adorable shadows turned a full 180, becoming ruthless towards the enemies. quite a show you’d say. after though, they’re back to flocking over you, even dismissing jin-woo lmao

jin-woo, watching you give each shadows head pats: i hate it here

you: get in line then

> it may be due to his newly acquired talents and his current mental and physical prowess but he has become more perceptive towards you. he can always read you and know just what your mood is and he always tries to make you feel better by giving his whole attention to you.

> of but of course, since dear jin-woo has become quite the looker, you also notice how girls flock over to him. and especially miss hae-in (she’s very sweet yes, but hey that’s your man so like—). the moment you discovered that she left her guild to join jin-woo’s, and then confessed (well basically she did) to your man, well you were upset but really who could blame her? instead of taking your frustrations out on her and your boyfriend, you decided to just talk it out with jin-woo and ask him about how it went. the two of you cleared it out and you got kisses and maybe even more after that ;))

> you and jin-ho are menaces to society when you are together, he hates how endearing and annoying you two can be. i mean, does he really hate it? nope, he absolutely loves seeing you two interact, although his head always throbs when you two start screaming to britney, gaga, and doja.

> a tease, he has become the master of being a tease, you hate it and love it at the same time. he’d trail kisses down your neck to your thighs and leave some marks then he’d suddenly walk away while asking you what take-out you want. rude, that’s what he is. ofc he always finished what he starts tho oop-

> he always randomly bites you now, you don’t know why but it’s really cute when he starts nibbling so you let him be.

> so extra when he tells you that he loves you. he professes it in such weird but adorable ways. one time he had printed out ‘i love you so much’ on a big-ass tarpaulin and had his shadows hold it for him while he’s kneeling down smoldering at you. you hate him so much (you don’t-). or that one time he bought a bouquet basket and had a ring tied to one of the flowers, you had to take the bouquet apart since the damn ring fell to the very bottom.

> sometimes when he gets back to the agency after his dungeon raids you and jin-ho would see him all grumpy and you immediately know that either he wasn’t able to make the enemy his soldier or his coat got ruined.

jin-woo: *sad noises*

jin-ho: that’s okay, you can kill and slaughter the others and take their souls next time

you: jin-ho couldn’t you have worded that better-

over-all, he’s the bestest boyfriend, such a sweet and handsome pretty boy much strong and reliable we love him<333

-•-

- a/n: i can add more to this if you’d like!! just hit me up again lmao it’s too long now so-

#sung jin woo x reader #sung jin woo #solo leveling #solo leveling x reader #manhwa #jin woo #jinwoo #sung jinwoo #winamikobabbles #sung jinwoo x reader

1K notes · View notes

lovenona · 3 years

Note

ship your moots? (´,,•ω•,,)♡

ok king here we go

@suedebunn; rengoku. i am adamant in this. bunny girl lyn with big kind-hearted flame boy? it is a match made in heaven. u deserve to be happy

@two-percent-milk; nanami. how does it feel to be god’s favorite? u deserve a man who will take care of u but also dismantle capitalism with his bare hands

@kmorgzz; kuroo. no i am not just saying this because i’m an astrological kuroo kinnie. u need a man who will have some crazy [redacted] with u but also knows when to be kind and serious <3

@alto-march-of-death; ushijima. i know akaashi is ur soulmate but there is something about wakatoshal that cannot be expressed in human language. u guys have a cat, for god’s sake

@cryptidkatts; sakusa. kattoomi supremacy now and forever. u deserve old money sakusa who buys u art supplies and also [redacted for content.] kattoomi is written in the stars. kattoomi is canon. goodnight

@keishinslove; ukai. hot e-girl and sexy possibly mafia daddy. i’m literally crying thinking abt this i don’t think I need to elaborate any further ur honor

@waitforitillwritemywayout; sakusa. u deserve to be happy, darling. u would both be so funny and chill and i think i would be so intimidated by ur super cool and suave presence. please get married

@introloves; bokuto. is this a surprise??? jax has the sweetest, bubbliest personality and absolutely deserves a man with big tiddies and even bigger thighs to love and cherish her

@osamwu; mattsun. ever since i have met u i have learned that kitty and mattsun r the cutest little couple in the universe. i wish this happy couple all the best <3

@spikesbimbo; spike. girl u absolutely deserve to have a super hot dilf [redacted] u on his spaceship. also both of u are super hot and would literally be the coolest couple in outer space

@pinkoushi; yachi. i think u deserve someone to call a good girl and eat her [redacted] whenever u want. i also think u both would be so cute because ur both really soft and sweet and caring. how does it feel to win?

@ryoskuna; sukuna. i'm giving u the king. his tsundere facade with ur humor and big intelligent brain are a match for the ages. ur hades and persephone incarnate. godspeed and i wish u the best with his two massive [redacted]

– i'm sorry if i missed anyone, my brain short circuited and forgot every person i've ever met; i love all my moots dearly and validate every self-ship in existence <3

#I hope y'all enjoy #also if I forgot u I'm sorry #my brain is the size of a pea #letters to adele

24 notes · View notes

hiddenwashington · 3 years

Text

we are the april fools

y’all really thought we forgot meme day? april fools! to celebrate, here is a compilation of our bullshit for your memeing pleasure. enjoy!

**tw for nsfw, drug mention, alcohol mention, swearing

‘ fuck off you fucking gremlin ’

‘ what’s pegging? ’

‘ stop trying to make furcocks happen it’s never going to happen ’

‘ he obviously gets pegged. he gets fucked by women and life ’

‘ mister mistoffelees is my cat boyfriend ’

‘ one is a kink, one is a crime ’

‘ i live for chaos you gotta feed me ’

‘ i’ll continue being an asshole for your amusement ’

‘ i’m ready, bring on the anxiety ’

‘ call me big daddy ’

‘ we’ll scar ourselves for valentines day ’

‘ and then she wrote me a novel about his cocaine addiction ‘

‘ sponsored by ritz cheese crackers, absolute shit ‘

‘ you have no legacy, your legacy is to be disappointed all the time ‘

‘ you're like some sad soccer mom that came for the wine instead of your kids soccer game ‘

‘ karen can choke i would never forget the sangria ‘

‘ band kids do the blowing excuse you ‘

‘ it is i, the mullet of your dreams ‘

‘ you cannot mention pornhub this is why youre not hr ‘

‘ i’m on the clock to knock your lights out ’

‘ i’m livin la tiddy loca ‘

‘ righting the world and the economy one karen at a time ‘

‘ let the red rocket rail me ’

‘ i suck at swallowing drinks but i'm good at eating shit ’

‘ u can fight my brain and my anxiety sis we’re having ✨a terrible time✨ ’

‘ i’m on it drag that bitch to denny’s i’ll take her ass out ’

‘ today i learned that cocaine could be an antidepressant if the government weren't cowards ’

‘ i feel like my tik tok feed has become the meld of anime and horny tiktok, in the sense that i keep seeing tiktoks of boys in maid dresses ’

‘ i had five shots of espresso, even god can't stop me ’

‘ ted bundy is up first i will square up ’

‘ one day i will have the pleasure of going to hell and murdering freud ‘

‘ i will not face consequences for my actions. you can not make me ’

‘ voldemort doesn’t have the emotional range to bottom ’

‘ i can accept that i have a flaw or two. that’s it though, just two ’

‘ i know you try very hard, but you are very stupid ’

‘ let's go straight, a thing we've never said before in this groupchat ’

‘ what those tentacles do baby? ’

‘ suck my dick you stupid leprechaun ’

‘ you better be ready to sleep with moth man - hi dad! ’

‘ you really think you could take on the kool-aid man and take no damage??? ’

‘ i don’t have a foot fetish, i’m just autistic ‘

‘ i haven’t even learned multiplication, how am i supposed to know what a pyramid scheme is? ‘

‘ do i look sexy while dying? ‘

‘ have you been watching too much youtube? ’

‘ fucking ipad kids, man ’

‘ i can be sane about this i promise but not today ‘

‘ i’m a catch and i can also sleep with a younger man ’

‘ how do you milk an oat ’

‘ fuck my dad ’

‘ sometimes you just need to start swinging ’

‘ i just watched a cat girl walk out of thin air in a starbucks ‘

‘ isn’t that that furry thing people are into ‘

‘ i’m gonna go on The Google and see if i can figure anything out ‘

‘ am i high too? ‘

‘ fuck off bambi ‘

‘ since there was no warning and i make the rules here ‘

‘ you'll go where i say you’ll go ‘

‘ does a - mother fucker ‘

‘ gonna play chase the emo ‘

‘ we love biting dilfs….? ’

‘ optimistic nihilism, right? none of us matter ’

‘ it’s kinda cringe to be kidnapped ’

‘ you rolled a 5, stfu this rabbit’s coming to brand you ’

‘ is he immune to KNIVES?? ‘

‘ alright -- now to kill this dad ‘

‘ if you think garfield is going to stand against me in court, you’re out of your fucking mind ’

‘ no offense but you have like no mom vibes ’

‘ i think i got threatened by a furry ’

‘ speak of the cat lady and she shall appear ’

**shotguns frappuccino** ‘ there’s many ways to drink a drink ’

‘ these hands are magic, baby ’

‘ are you saying naruto is jesus?? ’

‘ your pride is going to get us killed ’

‘ you look like you could fit under a bush ’

‘ y’all test me… ’

‘ i am SO GLAD you didn’t get vored by a cloud ’

‘ try to crowd surf the third graders! ’

‘ some things are better off unknown , the phrase will haunt me but… ’

#meme day

17 notes · View notes