It also doesn’t help that I cannot barely tell types attraction and normal feelings apart. I feel generally excited to hug my friend and then panic and worry I have a crush on them

undoing internalized amatonormativity (holy shit big words im so smart) is very difficult bc its so ingrained in us that if u feel close to someone it Must Be Romantic and society says that there if u feel warm and fuzzy around someone u Must Be In (Romantic) Love which doesnt take into account that u absolutely can like ur friends?? u can be close to ur friends without considering ur relationship to be romantic! its like ppl point at what they say is an obvious line between Romance and Just Friends but the "line" is just a random stick that fell on the sidewalk