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#theyd beg me to stay. id give them another chance and once again they start acting like the person i wanted to be with. rinse and repeat.
snekdood · 1 year
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I do kinda think peoples reaction to thinking i prevented my ex from Being Whatever They Want and then trying to exclude me entirely from the things i identify with- like... How is that okay in any capacity? If you did this in regard to my trans identity, would it still be okay? Why is it okay with the rest of the ways i identify too? I never stopped them from being anything anyways, i just didnt want to date someone who was mirroring me so fucking much, goddamn, i was okay with being their friend still, why is that so hard to understand. Sorry i dont wanna fuck someone whos pretending to be my clone, almost in an effort to mock me..?
#some of yall are genuinely bad people. like you do need to digest that fact.#all of this based on a rumor. and again i state like ive stated a million times. what will you do when you find out theyre the abuser?#are you gonna try to apolgozie to me for trying to run me off the internet ostracize and bully me?#or are you gonna come up with a million justifications for why your behavior was fine even though you didnt know?#like maybe. just maybe. in situations where you dont know the truth of the situation. maybe. just dont act on the impulse to hurt#someone because you really really want to believe the other person you like more is telling the truth. idk. just an idea.#because i dont think yall are capable of the self introspection right now to realize how fucking abusive your behavior has been.#JUST because its directed at mem suddenly its totally fine. lets not think about the possibility snake could be telling the truth too.#nawww... the guy who identifies as a snake and looks like a disney villain? im totally not allowing my subconscious biases navigate the#way i treat people in this situation. boy do i love my angel looking boys.#me* not mem lol#surely my culturally christian upbringing isnt playing a part in any of this.#anyways. i never went out of my way to invalidate them but ik believing that would make their narrative crumble for you.#i knew what i wanted. they knew what i wanted. they pretended to be what i wanted. when we got comfortable and i got used to#them being that way theyd start to morph back into who they really are. i dont like who they really are. id try to break up woth them.#theyd beg me to stay. id give them another chance and once again they start acting like the person i wanted to be with. rinse and repeat.#that was the entire relationship. i tried breaking up with them so many times but they were too ig dependant on me#and didnt want me to leave bc ig they thought if i wasnt dating them that id just abandon them and never help them with anything.#i do think its more they knew they could manipulate me easier if we were together and they pretended to be what i wanted.#thats what happened and im sorry you cant accept the truth of who your fave is and what theyre like my dude.#me not liking who they really are has nothing to do with their transness. sure. who they really are is more masc than what i wanted.#but kre than that. who they really were was kinda just a skeevy selfish shitty person who thinks really highly of themselves.#and i just didnt dig that man. not sure what to tell you.#should i have put my foot down and left anyways? yes. and i did. but i knew that when i did break up with them they would turn on me.#like they did. and stabbed me in the back a million times. hoping id hate being alive enough bc of the ostracism to kill myself.#then thered be no one to criticize them for their actions or abusive behavior anymore.#but yeah idc. im not going anywhere. you're gonna tell the truth or put up with my existence. those are your options.#anyways i dont think the progressive solution to you believing i prevented them from being things is to prevent me also from#being things. like how does that help when you just spread the supposed pain.... not to mention it was more of a seed you planted#rather than a plant that was already growing
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astudyinfic · 5 years
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Flufftober Day 12 - Phone
Originally posted on AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16154378/chapters/38069525
The yearly meeting of High Warlocks was an event that Magnus dreaded.  Partially because warlocks, on account of being immortal, could hold grudges for a pathetically long time.  No sense in rehashing all the old grievances, of which many were directed towards him. If he could skip it, he would but as High Warlock in an area well known for being a hotbed of Shadow World activity, he knew he needed to be there.  
The decision to go wasn’t made any easier by the fact that Max practically begged him to stay that morning.  “Papa! No!! Papa stay!” he’d repeated over and over, tears filling his eyes and spilling down his beautiful blue cheeks.  
His resolve nearly slipped until Alec scooped Max into his arms and held him close.  “Maxie, it will be fine. Papa is only going to be gone a few days and you can call him whenever you need.”  Magnus gave Alec a grateful smile. Somehow his husband always knew what to say to make everything better.
“I can call?” Max asked, voice steady for the first time since they told him Magnus was leaving.  
“I promise, Blueberry,” Magnus smiled.  “I’ll even put a special ringtone, just for you.”  Magnus made a point of pulling out his phone right then, changing Alec’s entry to Blueberry for the trip, to make Max happy and adding the perfect song to play every time he called.  “See, just for you.” He winked at Alec who grinned at him over Max’s shoulder.
That was that, Magnus thought to himself when he finished packing and kissed his two favorite guys goodbye.  He opened the portal to Vancouver, where the meeting was taking place and settled into their home there for the few days he’d be away.  (He’d had a few houses before Alec came into his life, but after Alec took the mantle of immortality for himself, they started buying them in every city they loved, so they’d always have a place to stay.)
Later that night, he grinned when the phone rang with Max’s personal ringtone.  The three of them talked until Max fell asleep and then Magnus and Alec continued to talk for another hour.  He hated being away from them and vowed to return the moment the meeting was done. The phone was nice and all but he wanted to be there in person.  Magnus missed his family and hardly thought he could be blamed for that.
The meeting started like any other.  The bickering started within minutes of them all arriving and while Magnus did his best to remain out of it, he got dragged into more than a few disagreements.  Enjoying a peaceful moment while London and Paris were fighting with one another, a loud song cut through the din, causing every warlock in the place to stop and turn in his direction.
Max’s ringtone.
Magnus could have sworn he muted his phone before he got there but it was no matter.  Giving an apologetic smile, he answered the phone as quickly as he could. “Blueberry, now isn’t a good time.  How did you get Daddy’s phone?”
“Daddy took the day off but Uncle Jace is here and they are talking so I got his phone and called you.  You need to come home. It’s been too long.”
Laughing, Magnus let out a soft sigh.  “Max, it has only been fifteen hours. You’re going to be fine.  Go give Daddy back his phone and play some pranks on Uncle Jace until I get back.”  
“Okay, I love you, Papa!  Bye!”
Slipping his own phone back into his pocket, he gave the rest of the High Warlocks a quick smile.  “Kids, what are you going to do, right?”
It took an hour longer but eventually, they got down to the actual business they were there to discuss.  As the High Warlock of Lima was explaining why Magnus’s ban would continue for another year (and why couldn’t they just let that go already?), the instantly recognizable notes of Max’s ringtone interrupted.   Well, there’s another year tacked on, I’m sure , Magnus thought and turned the phone off.  He could talk to Max in a few minutes. No sense in angering some important allies or giving his enemies any more ammunition against him.  
Of course, having it turned off wasn’t going to stop Max and a minute later, the phone rang again.  Magnus ran from the room, breathless when he answered, “Max? What is the problem?”
“Hi, Papa!”
“Max, is there a problem?”  He was starting to doubt it but he had to ask.  
Max’s laugh was really all the answer he needed but his son still said, “No, Papa!  I miss you!”
“I miss you too, Blueberry, but Papa is in an important meeting and you can’t keep calling me every few minutes.  And if my phone is off it’s for a good reason so please don’t magic it back on.”
“Bu...bu...but I want to talk to you.”  Magnus’s heart broke at the sound of his son’s cracking voice and he could picture the tears that were probably filling his big blue eyes as they spoke.  
“I know, Blueberry, and I’ll call as soon as I am done with the meeting, okay?  I love you.”
“Love you too, Papa.”
Hoping that the talk would be enough to get Max through the end of the day, Magnus sat back down in the room.  He managed to get through his own report before the phone rang once more.
Every time, he answered it, asked Max not to call until later and then returned to the meeting.  And without fail, Max would call back within the hour (sometimes only minutes later).
By the end of the first day, most of the other High Warlocks were desperately tired of that song, and Magnus was too, if he was being completely honest.  
When the phone rang just minutes before the meeting was to adjourn for the night, Magnus grabbed his things and left the room immediately.  He’d deal with those warlocks in the morning. Right now he had to deal with the tiny one on the other line.
“Maxwell Ragnor Lightwood-Bane, what could possibly be the problem this time?” he snapped, knowing it would result in tears but too tired and frustrated to stop the words before they slipped out.
To his surprise, a well-loved baritone chuckled on the other end.  “I suppose that answers my question,” Alec said, amusement coloring his words.  “I was calling to find out if I’d really called you twenty-nine times today. Max?”
“Max,” Magnus agreed.  It felt so good to hear Alec’s voice that an idea came to him almost immediately.  He kicked himself for not thinking of it sooner. “Darling, any chance you could take a couple more days off?”
He could hear Alec’s smile when he said “Yes,” obviously knowing what was coming.  
“Wonderful.  There will be a portal in the living room in fifteen minutes.  Pack some bags. We’re having a working holiday weekend in Vancouver.”  If Max called in the next fifteen minutes, Magnus was going to just portal them over without stuff and they could get it once they arrived.  
“It’s been that good, huh?”
“Twenty-nine, Alexander.  Twenty-nine times. I don’t think I could tell you what is happening in the meeting because I’ve spent most of it on the phone with our son.”
“Don’t worry, Mags.  We’ll see you in a few minutes.  I love you.”
“I love you too.  And darling?”
“Yes?”
“Keep your phone away from our son until you get here, would you?”
Alec’s laugh echoed in his ears and warmed his heart as he returned to their home to get the house ready for the rest of the family.  
They’d been needing a vacation anyway.
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