Binah Pining Headcanons

Lobotomy Corporation Warnings for mentions of exhaustion and passing out

yes i will eventually do Ruina ones too

~ * ~ -You are the one single thing she is uncertain about -Everything else is trivial and dull to someone as apathetic as she. But you, oh you- whenever she sees you her mind short circuits, going blank for a brief moment -It doesn’t sound like much, but it is for Binah, she’s not used to being lost for words from just a simple glance -She doesn’t know whether to confront you or keep quiet, either- her heart starts acting weirdly whenever she approaches you, even if it’s with work-related business -It results in a lot of her staring at you from across the room as you feel a pair of eyes bore into the back of your skull -Binah expresses these odd feelings in small ways- leaving a cup of hot tea for you, carefully organizing the files you need to work on so she can make your job a little easier, or just keeping an eye on you from afar -She’s entirely aware of how intimidating she is, so at first she tries to refrain from actually speaking to you most of the time. Yet you don’t seem to mind, engaging her in conversation on your own volition like she’s one of your coworker friends -The casual talks you have together become a bright spot in the otherwise midnight depths of the Extraction Department -It’s a little surreal for your fellow employees, seeing you chatting with their Sephirah so calmly as she listens intently to your every word -You can talk about anything, even the most boring, silly matters, and the normally cold Binah will still become keenly interested in the subject -Sidenote: she really wants to wrap you in her cloak, as it can get rather cold in the facility (and she also just wants to hug you but don’t tell anyone that)-Once you passed out from exhaustion and woke up with her heavy furred coat draped over your body- she never did explain why…

-Speaking of which, Binah begins picking up on your habits and mannerisms during work. She’s incredibly observant, but this is the first time she’s actually cared about observing anything apart from death and destruction -She worries, silently, when she knows you’re not feeling well and sees you come to work anyways. On the days she can see you struggling to even function, she’ll come over and suggest that you retire for the evening. It comes out sounding more like a command, but the sentiment is there -As I mentioned, there have been times where you’ve fallen asleep at your desk due to overwork or sickness, and somehow, every time, you find yourself back in your bed when you wake up again. No one knows how it happened, because Binah’s very careful to make sure no one sees her carrying you back to your room -She’s internally hesitant about touching you. Her touches never linger, merely a brief hand on your shoulder most of the time, but it’s more than she offers anyone else. She knows her strength, so any touches are kept light, as to not hurt you -Keeps you away from the Well, no questions asked -When before Abnormality breaches only sparked vague interest, now her first thoughts go to you and if you’re alright- for some odd reason, she doesn’t relish your pain as she does for the rest of humanity -So she keeps you nearby as often as she can, close to someone she knows can protect you. She’s not an ex-Arbiter for nothing -If you have the habit of crafting little gifts for your coworkers, she’ll keep any you might give her forever, even if they’re just made of paper or something -Binah likes it when you laugh. It makes her feel something warm, something other than apathy -Practices smiling less sadistically- only for you, though. Luckily, you don’t seem to mind her smile either way -If you happen to hum while you’re working, she’ll find herself idly humming along, soft enough for no one but her to hear. She has a nice singing voice, even if no one knows about it -Her heart doesn’t entirely melt, per se, but it does defrost in your presence, just a little bit -Binah doesn’t know if she’ll ever be able to confess to you. In your current situation, it feels impossible- yet she finds herself hoping for the first time, wishing to say those simple words to you someday in the future. But not today. Or tomorrow. Or the day after that -(She knows how she would confess, though- she’d give you her other earring)