Your sweater looks so cool!! I envy how perfect the colors are kdndkfjrk I really gotta get one;;

Also how are you? Hopefully alright!! Please don't forget to not overwork yourself today! And if it's alright, could I be cake anon? (I was the one who said your art looked like it'd taste sweet)

I’m doing wonderful, albeit a little sleepy, as always :P

Also, don’t worry about me. I don’t overwork myself anymore hehe I’ve been improving a lot with that recently, but thank you for the reminder! And of course you could be cake anon!!

KAI-CHAN RADIO ⑤

☆ JUL 21, 2021☆

KAI: They competed for the fun~! YOU: Leisure activities, huh? Summer is full of it. And so, KAI: Kai-chan Radio! YOU: will also include Haduki You! See in you a moment♪

☆ KAI-CHAN RADIO IS A CASUAL RADIO ☆

KAI: Let's talk tonight♪ About our summer vacation activities! YOU: I started off extremely excited for it, but, I don't think I'll be able to go to the August's activities. Like the Lantern Festival dance, mountains, swimming pool, or even a little trip to the sea. Is that all?

KAI: Ah? Really? YOU: I'll be at home. Helping my parents. KAI: Oh right. The temple. YOU: Yup. Obon is the busiest time of the year. So, I have to travel with my family. KAI: Ooh. YOU: I've never really had much complaints about it. KAI: Ah, I see. YOU: Yeah, since I understood it ever since I was a child.

YOU: It felt a bit nice to see my parents relying on me for some things. I went exploring deeper into the mountains with Tooru (2nd oldest brother) once. And, when we returned later than usual, Sou (oldest brother) scolded us. We mess around a lot every day. KAI: Oh, Haduki brothers. You guys haven't changed at all (www)

YOU: I only remembered when I started talking. Still, I travelled about 2, 3 times. Near Takachiho and Hokkaido. And my memories from that time is a bit weird. Like, I remember the soft serve ice cream being delicious or the sea urchins being terrible (I like it now though) (www) KAI: Memories from long ago are really like that. Food being more important than famous places!

KAI: I also remember the souvenirs I bought on the way rather than the destination. It was a metal keychain with a dragon entwined around a sword. YOU: I knew you'd speak about it (www). Wasn't it the one where it had a lot of crystals or stone stuck to it? (wwww) KAI: I still have it (ww)

YOU: You still have it?! Wow (www) KAI: I use it for my car key. YOU: Extremely distracting... (www) KAI: Ah, anyways, about my leisure activities! I went to a lot of places, but have I told you about the year when my father rented a minibus to go on a family vacation? YOU: Minibus?! KAI: We are a big family (6 siblings). YOU: Ah.

KAI: My father did his best to get a license to drive our big family. YOU: Fuduki papa is amazing. KAI: I got one too. Let's all go~? YOU: The Fuduki family is amazing. KAI: The destination was for Tokyo's Disneyland! It was for a day, but if we include the sightseeing at the town on the way back, then it was 5 days in total? It was awesome. YOU: Sounds fun!

KAI: Maybe I remember this because it was during the time I enjoyed travelling? But anyways, in about two years, the Fuduki family once again travelled in the minibus! At that time, we travelled to Shikoku. YOU: Oh~ It takes a while to reach there, right? KAI: It took us a week to reach. YOU: Lots of driving (www).

KAI: No, at that time, the truck driver's cousin or I sometimes took over driving. On those days, my father would drink beer with his morning, evening and night meals. YOU: Fuduki papa (www) I get your feelings (www) KAI: It's a memory of my summer vacation activity, which was more fun than the destination itself ♪

KAI: And so, that was the Kai-chan Radio "Summer Vacation Activities" Edition! YOU: And then is... ah, right. Want to take some messages from people? I know it's late in the night, but if anyone is awake and has some messages for us, we'll accept them! KAI: Questions, messages, anything is fine~!

It's so hot that I feel like melting... Please give me an idea to cool down! = = YOU: I know! Turn on the cooler. KAI: A pragmatic answer (www) YOU: It's not good to put up with the heat ~ KAI: That's true. YOU: Watch out for heat stroke!

Thank you for sharing your stories. If you could travel now, where would you go...? = = YOU: It's really hot, so I want to take a dive in the sea. KAI: I'll be next to him! YOU & KAI: We want to go to the sea~~~!!! HARU: Didn't you go there the other day? (laughs)

Kai-san, You-san, thank you...! The final exam is about to start, so please give me some encouragement... = = YOU: Studying this late? Woah! We'll be cheering for you to do well! KAI: I'll support you with (my heart's) pompoms~ Hooray~ Hooray~ Study well!! YOU: A fun summer is waiting for you after the test!

Kai-kun! I have a glittering bow keychain, so let's compete against each other!!? (laughs) = = KAI: A fellow friend!!! Then, I'll be the second player!! Bring it on!! YOU: Exactly how will you fight (www)

Hello! I'd like to hear about any recent small incidents that occurred around Procella members! = = YOU: Yoru's glasses got deformed by the heat (www) KAI: He accidentally left it on the bonnet of our travel bus, it got deformed slightly after about 2 hours. (www)

24 hours a day isn't enough. What do you think? = = KAI: I guess it's slightly not enough? If you sleep while thinking, "Stay tuned for Kai tomorrow!", then you'll be excited. YOU: Don't get excited before going to bed (ww)

You-kun! Please do something with Aoi-kun!!!!!!! (I'm greedy) = = YOU: I like your greediness~ Yosh, let's do it now. Aoi-chan. AOI: Eeh?! YOU: I caught the retreating Aoi-chan. AOI: I-I got caught! KAI: Now, how do you want to do this?! YOU: What should we do? Aoi-chan. AOI: EHHHH?!

→ AOI: L-L-Let's peel it off! T/N: Aoi was trying to say "Look that way" (あっち向いてホイで lit. atchi muite hoi de) but ended up saying "Let's peel it off" (あっち剥いてホイで lit. atchi muite hoi de). Both have the same pronunciation, just different meanings.

→ AOI: What a terrible typo!!!

→ AOI: I meant 'Look that way'!! YOU & KAI: (wwwww) AOI: I was really flustered and when I thought I deleted it, I actually sent it instead. I meant 'Look that way'!!!~~~~~ You!!! Kai-san, geez!!! YOU & KAI: (wwww)

#Aoi won by default.

This is for a questionnaire, but what was doing your homework like? Did you fill in what you knew on the day you got it and left the rest blank and asked a friend for help, or leave some empty in the first week and finish the rest later? = = KAI: I did half in the first week, and the remaining in the last week.

→ YOU: I want to say that I finished it early in August... but I ended up frantically doing it towards the end (www) KAI: I can imagine that ~~ While Yoru did his patiently, right? YOU: Yup. Isn't that right? YORU: Yes. Ah, I also did the Radio calisthenics properly! Radio Calisthenics = a short exercise routine broadcast daily on Japan's national radio, streamed on YouTube, followed in parks and schools every day – sometimes several times a day – by all generations of Japanese people

It's been hot lately, but please tell us if you have a story that chilled you to your bones. = = KAI: Shun turned bright red and got a fever. YOU: He got one after frantically trying to decide the thumbnail for his Hajime-san video collection. KAI: He looked really happy when I putting the cooling patch on. YOU: His fever also came down almost immediately. YOU & KAI: We ate curry together.

Hi!! Starting from today, we'll be having the 4 day holiday, so will you all be working??? Are there any jobs you have with other members of the agency??? = = KAI: Hi~! Tomorrow will be a visual shooting with the theme of intelligence♪ YOU: It's not a job, but the day after tomorrow, I'll talk with Takaaki-san and Roa-san about an independent dance lesson along with a few more people. The 4 day holiday they're talking about is Marine Day, which lasts from Jul 22 - Jul 25 in Japan.

Is it okay to eat ice-cream at this time?! = = KAI: We've already eaten it (sparkles) YOU: Recently, my favorite one is... the Shi●kuma ice cream KAI: The melon flavour! This year, for some reason, the melon flavor is in demand. YOU: You can buy it at a convenience store ~ He's referring to the Shirokuma Ice Cream which is a shaved ice dessert topped with ice cream and condensed milk.

Please tell us what you had for dinner today! = = KAI: Pork shogayaki​. I really like it. Especially when its with White Rice. YOU: I get you.

Have you been interacted with the Gravi members lately? Please tell us if there's anything interesting👓✨ = = KAI: Oh, that emoji means Haru! Haru~ HARU: I was waiting so long to be called. YOU: You appeared so quickly (www) HARU: Something interesting... Ah, let's play Look that way! YOU: Is it popular in Gravi? (ww)

#Haru won and was satisfied when he left.

I'm busy and tired lately, so please leave a good luck charm please!! I love you!!! = = KAI: I love you too!! YOU: Me too! The is the best good luck charm you can believe in! We love you, support you, so please do your best!! KAI: I wish you a happy summer!

It's summer!!!!!! Did you have anything of a summer vibe that you ate?? = = KAI: Corn!!!!! Grilled Corn!!! YOU: Recently, Procella has this trend of using the Bato Mayo Soy Sauce with various things.

Is Maze slowly molting??! = = YOU: ......Maze? Are you molting? I've never cleaned them up. MAGELLAN: Que! (I forgot) KAI: He's always like fluffy. Maybe it's because he's an Demon World Penguin? Next time, let us touch you~

Speaking of summer vacation, I remember watching movies at movie theaters or on TV when I was in elementary school! Do you have a favorite movie when you were little? = = KAI: Back to the Fu●re that was rebroadcasted on TV! I feel like that's a classic one. YOU: There's also Toto●. KAI: Ah, there's that too! The child in the middle has my colors! Kai is referring to Back to the Future and I believe You is referring to My Neighbor Totoro.

We can't drink outside, but have you been drinking at home?? = = YOU: The senior group sometimes drink on the balcony~ KAI: Only sometimes~ I don't drink a lot (laughs). And what about the middle group? YOU: We don't really drink much? Instead, we eat food.

KAI: That was all for the replies~! YOU: Thank you for your messages despite it being midnight! KAI: I was going to introduce the October's CD but it's so late now, so I'll do it tomorrow! YOU: If you're going to do it tomorrow, then just call in the people themselves. KAI: Ah, true. Anyways, this is all for today's corner!

KAI: It was Kai-chan Radio, Summer Vacation Activity Edition~! YOU: Thank you for listening to us! Ah, Kai, let's say that. KAI: That? YOU (whispers unintelligently to Kai) KAI: Uhhh.. KAI & YOU: Dream well? KAI: .... YOU: .... KAI: I'm kind of embarassed. YOU: Why? (www)

#Kai-chan Radio #Thank you

✧If you like my work, then please consider supporting me here. Thank you~!

[Translation] Machine Elements - Cast Presentation: VAZZY

VAZZY!!!!! I’ve been holding back on posting this because I wanted to go about the pamphlet in order but AHHHHH HERE THEY ARE FINALLY!!!  VAZZROCK’s just my current bias wwwww

Thank you again to Deea~!! 

※ Please don’t re-post and re-translate this interview under any circumstances. If you want to translate it to your native language, I can provide the kanji I transcribed from the scans ^^

Under the cut, enjoy~!

MAMIYA TAKAAKI

“Shouldn’t you be accompanying the more qualified superiors instead of me? (bitter smile)”

 PROFILE:

NAME: Mamiya Takaaki

GUILD: VAZZY (※Guildmaster)

BASE: Industrial City [Touda]

☐ Being in command of the 5th sector of the Twelve Regions, he’s the Guildmaster of quite a large guild. He had originally planned to go about work lazily and easily but, after being seen to possess the qualities of a [Meister], he was voted by his friends and became the new Guildmaster.

☐ The old Guild Master was quite the elderly lady. She was also Takaaki’s mentor. When Takaaki was hesitating to be the new Master, she was the one  who convinced him to do it.

☐ He, together with SolidS’ Shiki and QUELL’s Shu became Guild Masters at about the same time as each other so, their relationship is quite the deep one. Since it’s an age where a lot of the Masters are young, this generation has been called [The Golden Age] as well.

☐ He goes about things in a carefree manner from time to time and is friendly with anyone. One might not think him to be the Guildmaster of such a huge guild but he possesses great sense of judgment and has the ability to take action when needed. His members trust him passionately.

☐ He got injured in an accident after protecting Ouka and Issa long ago and so his left arm got burned pretty badly. The accident left scars on his arm and he sometimes hides it with an arm cover. It might look like it hurts a  lot but it seems like it’s not that much of a problem. He himself doesn’t seem to mind it much.

COMMENT:

Heya, good afternoon. I’m VAZZY’s Mamiya Takaaki.

Together with all these men who’ll be experiencing the stage for the first time, VAZZY will be participating in the joint stage [Kiso Sekai]. With all these good looking men in a line, I’m pretty sure that your eyes would definitely get their eye candy (laughs). One of my roles is to fight against the requests of all these great people as one of the representatives of the [Twelve Regions]. Wait? Isn’t this a bit similar to my real role? Well, it has that kinda feel. In any case, I plan to act like I’ve experienced this before so as to not to lose to these unique people, okay~?

Please look forward to it.

KIRA OUKA

“Don’t complain. Do your work properly, okay, Guildmaster?”

PROFILE:

NAME: Kira Ouka

GUILD: VAZZY

BASE: Industrial City

☐ A young man who has supported VAZZY’s activities for a long time as he is the grandson of the former Guildmaster. He has known of the current     Guildmaster Takaaki for a while now and is assisting him.

☐ Several years ago-- There was once an incident where he and Issa went to go excavate a certain ruin when a relic started going wild. It was an     incident that, if nothing was done about it, would have caused complete     destruction of the city. Fortunately, Takaaki was there to oversee the     incident. It was because of this accident that Takaaki’s arm got burned.     Ouka, after blaming himself for Takaaki’s injury, learned a strong water element with great powers of healing and has since become a Craftsman.

☐ During the ceremony for Takaaki’s succession as the Guildmaster, Takaaki announced that he would do his work with one arm only. (By the way, Takaaki was told “The work is heavy” so for a while he was tasked to do work as an interim Director General).

☐ Ouka is awkward and can’t communicate well so he’s easily misunderstood but, he’s very straightforward.

COMMENT:

I’m Kira Ouka from VAZZY. Even on stage, my role is that of someone who works to support VAZZY’s Mamiya Takaaki. Although I have been in the industry for a long time, I have very little experience doing stage work. Speaking as someone from the same agency, I will give my all so as to not spoil everyone’s hard-work by slowing them down in any way, and to be able to show you a wonderful work.

Please look forward to it.

KIDUKU ISSA

“Don’t hold back, Futaba.”

PROFILE:

NAME: Kiduku Issa

GUILD: VAZZY

BASE: Industrial City

☐ He’s a young man who’s in charge of taking care of the troublemakers… Or rather, he’s actually the Floor Director. With VAZZY being a huge guild, it’s not uncommon to think that they would have a large number of quarries and mining points. The workers working there are a bit rough so skirmishes and fights are a daily occurence. Though it is his job to calm those fights down, he uses a lot of aggressive words and actions so there ends up being more fights. It’s not rare for him to come back home all beat up.

☐ He has a habit of saying “Tell me that when you’re actually stronger,” and likes to act superior. True to his nature, his actual fighting skills are a cut above the others.

☐ The only people who can calm him down are his brother, Futaba, and the Guildmaster Takaaki. Though it’s obvious that Futaba can do it due to their closeness in age, Takaaki saved him when they were younger so he’s surprisingly honest around him.

☐ Work-wise, he and Ouka are matchless people. Though, they never seem to get on well and they always fight the moment they see each other. But, he acknowledges Ouka’s skills deep inside.

COMMENT:

I’m VAZZY’s Kiduku Issa, nice to meet you.

This might be my first time in a play but, I plan to do it perfectly.

I’ll do my best in rehearsals so that they won’t be able to say anything about me. There are a lot of action scenes, too, so I’ll put my all into it.

KIDUKU FUTABA

“I know (laughs). Now then… Let’s get to work, Nii-san!”

PROFILE:

NAME: Kiduku Futaba

GUILD: VAZZY

BASE: Industrial City

☐ He’s the one in charge of controlling his older brother Issa, the man called VAZZY’s Typhoon. Though, it’s because he is skilled as well that he listens and gives advice his brother. He has a seriousness that allows him to be disciplined each and every day.

☐ Not only is he good with fighting but with studies as well. He has presented a lot of research and as such, has managed to earn the title of [Craftsman].

☐ He also acts as a combat teacher for Naosuke and a tutor for Yuma. He     continues to polish his own skills to not lose to his two students who continue to grow every day.

☐ He is friends with Procellarum’s Kai who he met at a pier despite not knowing of each other’s circumstances. It’s rumored that they sometimes talk about their friends and what they have in common.

COMMENT:

I’m VAZZY’s Kiduku Futaba.

I only recently debuted so I’m sure that there are people who are only getting to know me for the first time so I hope that you’ll recognize my name and face with this play.

[KisoSekai] might be an adventure story where we get to see the characters grow as they chase the world’s mysteries but, I promise to absorb what I learn here to grow properly in real life, too.

So that I’ll be able to call my reliable senpais my rivals! So that we’ll leave an impression on you in a good way! First, I’ll do my best with rehearsals! Please look forward to it!

OYAMA NAOSUKE

“I’m sure that there’s a reaaaaallly great treasure over there, Yuma!!”

PROFILE:

NAME: Oyama Naosuke

GUILD: VAZZY

BASE: Industrial City

☐ VAZZY’s (self-proclaimed) anticipated rookie. His father and older brother  are both Craftsmen so, he studies and trains hard every day to be able to  follow in their footsteps.

☐ There was an incident where he got stranded in the mines after trying to help a stray kitten. Fortunately, he got saved by Takaaki. Ever since then, when he’s asked about the people he admires, Takaaki’s name comes up. He hopes to one day be a great leader, too.

☐ He’s childhood friends with Yuma so they live near each other. Their households are great friends as well and they were raised together as if they were brothers. He proudly announces that Yuma, who is handsome and can do anything, as his best friend.

☐ Recently, he got stranded in another mine after trying to help kids who got lost inside. That’s when Six Gravity’s Arata saved him. He got a red scarf from Arata as a present and proof of being a real hero. It’s his treasure.

COMMENT:

Hello~! I’m VAZZY’s Oyama Naosuke!

This is my first time in a play, and it’s a joint stage, too. [Mise-en-scène, matinee, soiree] there were a lot of fancy and technical words and I even heard someone say [If you throw that, I’ll kill you] from the sidelines! These were all things I only found out today! This time, I play a character that’s very similar to my real personality but, I hope that someday I’ll be able to perform a role that’s completely different from me!

I’ll do my best~! I’m gonna get fired up~!

SHIRASE YUMA

“I’m used to your recklessness but… (bitter smile) Don’t push yourself, okay, Nao?”

PROFILE:

NAME: Shirase Yuma

GUILD: VAZZY

BASE: Industrial City [Touda]

☐ VAZZY’s promising rookie. He comes from a house that’s raised generations of major executives for VAZZY. His father as well is a competent board member that the current Guildmaster Takaaki relies on. After listening to his father’s stories of [experiencing the joy of having found someone to devote yourself to] he himself longs to have someone like that.

☐ He’s childhood friends with Naosuke. Naosuke’s direct actions when confronting Issa for the first time came as a shock, and at the same time, an amazement, to Yuma. It might be different from the [devotion] he seeks but he holds natural feelings of [I want to save him] towards Naosuke so he believes that what they have would be a relationship that lasts a lifetime.

☐ He admires Ouka’s perfect work and so his goal is to one day become Ouka’s assistant.

COMMENT:

Hello to everyone who came to [KisoSekai]’s performance. I’m VAZZY’s Shirase Yuma.

As I’m giving commentary, I just realized that I’m facing my struggles as this is my first stage (bitter smile). It’s my first time meeting with new words, new atmospheres, and new movements. There’s a lot for me to remember but they all give their own kind of excitement that I get lost in them. Every day is not easy but, it really is fun. I believe that this sort of excitement will really connect with everyone! I’m off to go to rehearsals today, too!

※ Please don’t re-post the English translations without permission.

If you enjoyed this, please consider buying me a ko-fi here to support my work if you want. (o^▽^o)Thank you!!

[Translation] IDOLiSH7: Rabbit Chat [Yuki - Bunny Hoodie]  Part 5

Title: "Happy Birthday” From Everyone

Participants: Momo, Tsumugi, Yuki

Source: Unlocked in game from Yuki’s limited birthday (2016) card, pictured here.

**Note: This will only be part 5, since I’m just aiming to complete the card. The previous four are available as translated by someone else; you can see @i7rabicha for a record of this (here).

------------------------------------------------------------------------

*** [Previous: (see i7rabicha -- note: not my translation!)] *** [Next: N/A]

------------------------------------------------------------------------

(Momo)

Yuki, happy birthday!! *ﾟﾛﾟ)*ﾟﾛﾟ)*ﾟﾛﾟ)ノ~★celebration★＼(ﾟﾛﾟ*(ﾟﾛﾟ*(ﾟﾛﾟ*

And, little miss manager, thank you for being such a wonderful guide! Trying to lead Yuki around is a real pain, no?

(Tsumugi)

Yuki-san, Happy Birthday!

Not at all...! We had everyone’s smooth lead-ins, so we somehow even got him to arrive early!

(Yuki)

Thank you both, really.

It was fun in a different way from the surprises I’ve helped with.

(Momo)

I felt like a mother watching her child set foot in the outside world for the first time! ww

(Yuki)

I managed to go outside on my own, so keep me company next time we’re free. ^^

(Momo)

It’s good to just do it once in a while! Didn’t it give you time to think about a lot of stuff? While walking along such nostalgic streets.

(Yuki)

It did. I kept remembering things, like how we’d buy meat buns at this convenience store and split them in half, or how we’d stay at that one cafe until it was closing time, working on songs.

(Momo)

Amazing, Yuki!! You remembered, I’m so happy.

(Yuki)

I always remember everything about you, Momo.

(Momo)

Now you’re lying! You totally didn’t remember the anniversary of the first time I took a bath together with you!!

(Yuki)

Isn’t that one a bit too difficult?

(Momo)

It’s not difficult!! You just lack enough love!!

(Yuki)

You’re such a harsh judge.

(Tsumugi)

It surely just means that’s how much Momo-san loves you, Yuki-san!

(Momo)

That’s right~! And it was super difficult trying to rent this place starting midnight, they only let us have it for the sake of old friendships!

(Yuki)

Just goes to show how talented you are, Momo.

Still, seeing everyone that came to greet me wear T-shirts with our faces printed on them was quite the bizarre experience.

(Momo)

We prepared them specifically for this day! They were all really excited to wear them!

(Yuki)

Even TRIGGER?

(Momo)

They were super into it. In fact, it’s the first time I saw TRIGGGER that into something. So much that I promised to treat them to lunch later on.

(Yuki)

I bet it went more like, “We’ll wear them for you, so you owe us lunch.”

(Momo)

That’s not true! That’s not how I wrote that scenario in my head! ww

(Yuki)

I have no idea what you’re talking about.

Still, TRIGGER put on a show for us yet again.

(Momo)

It was such a passionate session...! I want to play guitar with them again!

(Tsumugi)

By the way, Momo-san, I heard that you kindly taught Iori-san and Riku-san how to play accompaniments...!

(Momo)

Well, I only taught them one that used to be popular among girls back in the day, though! w

(Yuki)

That was its own brand of interesting too, just like the seiyuu concerts that Nagi-kun goes to watch in secret.

Also, having Yamato-kun pour me a drink yet again felt really satisfying. That begrudging expression on him just gets my heart racing.

(Momo)

The fact that you keep bullying him like this is why he doesn’t like you! w

(Yuki)

I just can’t stop myself from picking on him.

(Tsumugi)

Speaking of IDOLiSH7, and that aside, I’ve been entrusted with everyone’s birthday messages yet again! May I post them in here again, just like last time...?

(Momo)

Show us, show us! Everyone’s messages of love towards Yuki!

(Yuki)

I’m counting on you, little miss manager!

(Tsumugi)

Iori-san: “Yuki-san, I wish you a happy birthday. I heard that you and nii-san have made plans to become cooking buddies. I will continue to look up to you as a model senior when it comes to both personal and professional matters. We’ll be in your care.”

Yamato-san: “Happy Birthday, Yuki-san. It is true that we’ve been in your care and we owe you for a lot of things, so I chose to attend today. Please continue to get along with Momo-san.”

Mitsuki-san: “Yuki-san, Happy Birthday! I was worried that just veggies might not have enough protein, so I tried cooking with a lot of beans and seeds. I apologize if that was uncalled for! For next time, please tell me about your special vegetable menu!”

Tamaki-san: “Yukirin, hbd. You’ve taught me a lot of stuff. It’s always fun to spend time with you, Yukirin. I wanna say you don’t feel like a senior, but like not in a bad way. Let’s eat pudding together again.”

Sougo-san: “Yuki-san, I wish you a happy birthday. I’m glad to have been allowed to celebrate with you, so differently from how we did with Momo-san. It honored me to get to wear a printed T-shirt of the two of you and to be permitted at such a nostalgic location. I will treasure the memory for life. May you have a wonderful year.”

Nagi-san: “HAPPY BIRTHDAY, MR. YUKI! I look forward to seeing what forms of entertainment we can expect from you next. Also if you watch Cocona, you might become even happier.”

Riku-san: “Yuki-san, happy birthday to you!! I think it’s really great that your birthday is on Christmas Eve, because it feels like one amazing thing after another. I’m glad I got to celebrate your birthday, Yuki-san. I’ll work hard so that I can also become someone like you, who is able to convey such wonderful feelings to everyone!”

(Yuki)

This is nice.

It feels as if the whole world is revolving around me.

(Momo)

Yuki, did it make you emotional!?

(Yuki)

I wonder. Maybe it did.

(Momo)

Momo-chan can totally tell! You’re giving a really soft smile.

It’s the same face you made earlier when Okarin was singing on stage!

(Yuki)

I really didn’t expect Okarin to sing, so it felt moving to see.

(Tsumugi)

If it made you happy, then that’s all that matters...!

(Yuki)

Momo is one thing, but I never expected to receive this kind of celebration, myself.

(Momo)

What’re you talking about! Our juniors know all too well what a kind person you are, Yuki!

If they didn’t, they wouldn’t have gathered to have a party like this!

TRIGGER worked their hardest to celebrate too, and didn’t they send a message just earlier?

It says: “Looking at Re:vale, it’s easy to tell just how much you treasure each other, and that you mean the most in the world to each other. Please continue to be a model to us from now on as well, and to show us the greatest view as we walk in your footsteps.”

(Yuki)

So this time it wasn’t a declaration of war.

(Momo)

Well, they already did that last month after all!

(Yuki)

Then, should I take this chance to do an impression of Momo?

I’m so happy I could seriously burst. Oh, let these feelings of mine fly out into the entire world~

(Momo)

That’s no good--!! That lacked any flair, start all over!

(Yuki)

What’s flair.

(Tsumugi)

Yuki-san, could I have a little bit more of your time for something? Lol.

------------------------------------------------------------------------

>> 1. Was there anything you had particularly much fun with while celebrating?

>>

(Tsumugi)

Was there anything you had particularly much fun with while celebrating?

(Yuki)

When we kind of had a karaoke competition with everyone. Okarin was trying so hard while singing it was adorable. He never even goes to karaoke with us, so I felt moved.

------------------------------------------------------------------------

>> 2. Was there any part of the celebration that really surprised you?

>>

(Tsumugi)

Was there any part of the celebration that really surprised you?

(Yuki)

Maybe, how into it TRIGGER were. They were wearing sunglasses and those T-shirts. and even had a jam session with Momo. I think it’s best if TRIGGER fans never get to see that.

------------------------------------------------------------------------

>> 3. Was there any part of the celebration that you found difficult to handle?

>>

(Tsumugi)

Was there any part of the celebration that you found difficult to handle?

(Yuki)

Not me, but there was a part where Sougo-kun kind of had this passionate outburst, as if some hidden side of him went rampant, and Tamaki-kun was desperately trying to stop him. Does his personality change depending on the place he’s in too, just like it does when he’s drunk?

------------------------------------------------------------------------

(Momo)

Oh right, Yuki, did you get to see Ban-san!?

(Yuki)

No, I think I caught a glimpse of his ponytail from a distance at some point, but we didn’t get to meet face to face.

(Momo)

I wonder if he’s still being cautious...

(Yuki)

Isn’t that just Ban’s way of being thoughtful? We didn’t see him on your birthday either. So he can’t go showing his face just for mine now.

(Momo)

I see... Ban-san is so kind and considerate, I really like him...

(Yuki)

Momo, adultery is bad.

(Momo)

It’s not adultery!! Also, this feels like déjà vu wwwww

(Tsumugi)

Um... Actually, just like last month with Momo-san, I have been entrusted a message from Banri-san as well.

Of course, part of the reason he wasn’t able to meet you today was also how busy everything got, but... May I deliver the message...?

(Yuki)

I’m sure Ban must have known it would come to this, too. Would you be so kind, then?

(Momo)

Yes, let’s see the birthday message from our beloved Ban-san!

(Tsumugi)

Roger that!

“Happy birthday, Yuki. I never imagined I’d get to take part in both Momo-kun’s birthday and yours. This has honestly been a really great day for me. I listened to your new song, and rest assured that I’ll still be cheering you on from now on. Also, keep the rabbit chats to no more than one every three days.”

(Yuki)

Ban...

Isn’t this message way too cold compared to what Momo got?

(Momo)

Eeh!? Yuki, but can’t you feel the strong love overflowing from this message!?!?

(Yuki)

It has to be as direct as how you say it, Momo, or I can’t tell.

(Tsumugi)

(Momo)

You say that, but I saw you screencap it!! ww

(Yuki)

Well, because it’s one of Ban’s very rare affectionate moments.

(Momo)

Yuki, that’s a bit creepy wwww

(Yuki)

Momo, my mental stability isn’t infinite either, you know.

(Momo)

Sorry wwww

(Yuki)

After I’ve calmed down, I won’t forgive you unless you keep me company for an entire day.

(Momo)

That’s a really easy task, you know.

(Yuki)

Oh really, it’s that easy. Then, I’m sure you won’t mind writing me a passionate message right here either.

(Momo)

I already have one prepared, of course!!! I copied it from the memo and kept waiting for the right time to paste it!!!

(Yuki)

So your love for me is just copy paste level?

(Momo)

Don’t start stealing my lines, that stuff is what I usually say!! w

(Yuki)

I was joking.

(Momo)

I was, too. I don’t have any copy-paste, you know!

(Yuki)

I know.

(Tsumugi)

It’s a birthday message from Momo-san to Yuki-san, so I’m sure it will be full of love!

(Momo)

Little miss manager saying that just raised the bar even more, but I’ll do my best to live up!!

(Yuki)

Let me hear what you have to say, Momo.

(Momo)

Alright!

Um,,

Getting cornered like this sure makes me nervous.

Hey, Yuki.

Happy Birthday.

Even now, I’m still so unbelievably happy that I actually got to celebrate with you like this again.

Yuki, lately you’ve been doing your best to express a lot more of your feelings to me than just three simple words ever could, in a lot of ways. And you have no idea just how grateful I am, so much that I sometimes feel like my heart will burst from my chest.

Yuki.

I’m so glad and grateful that you exist.

Thank you for being by my side.

Thank you for letting me be your partner.

Please let me celebrate your birthday next year, too.

-- From Momo, who really loves you!

(Yuki)

I don't know what I'd do if you didn’t celebrate with me next year.

I’ll say it however many times it takes.

I swear we’ll still be together, even 100 years from now, or even 1000.

(Momo)

Yeah......

Wait, was it my birthday today...?? Why are we making me happy here......?

(Yuki)

No, you’re the one making me happy.

Because today is my birthday.

So please smile, Momo.

(Momo)

Okay...!

(Tsumugi)

I’ve witnessed yet again just how deep your bond runs... Also, your birthday has become quite the passionate topic on social media as well, Yuki-san!

(Momo)

She’s right! Here, Yuki, look how many birthday messages you got from the fans!

We really ought to post a reply from you for them. What should we write!!

(Yuki)

That’s true. Little miss manager, this thank-you message is addressed to you as well, so please let me type it.

Thank you for celebrating Momo’s birthday and mine again this year. I feel as if Momo and the fans are what gives meaning to my songs.

I would like you all to keep loving us, and only us, forever from now on.

And I’ll make sure that Momo’s and my Re:vale will keep charming you.

------------------------------------------------------------------------ 

Note: I do not own this card, so this translation was never intended to cover the rest of the parts, and it never will. I was just aiming to complete it because it was left unfinished before. The screencaps I used were kindly provided by KirakiraDenka on Twitter, and I received them via lli-luz-ill here on Tumblr. Thank you both!

Sougo Bday Card (2017) Rabicha Spoilers

Here is Tamaki’s. *warning*: super long. I went overboard and almost translated half of his rabicha this time hahah. I plan to do Nagi’s too!

Part 1

Sougo: I feel like this year’s birthday is different than last year’s.

Sougo: Last year, the feeling of guilt was stronger. I felt bad that everyone had to do all of that to me. But this year, I’m really looking forward to it.

Part 2

Otoharu: Sougo-kun, your expression was so gentle in your photobook cover! You can relax like that today, you know!

Sougo: At first, I was so nervous, Tamaki-kun even said that my face was stiff. That made me so worried, but then he successfully made me laugh again…

Sougo: When we’re taking my photos, Tamaki-kun used King Pudding hand puppet to cheer me up. It really helped me to relax.

Otoharu: I see! As expected of MEZZO". Tamaki-kun knows what he’s doing.

Banri: We ended up talking about Tamaki-kun’s good point, we’re supposed to talk about Sougo here, though!

Sougo: Ah, I’m so sorry! Even though everyone has given me their time….

Tsumugi: Spending our time with Sougo-san is fun!

Sougo: Thank you very much, Boss, Banri-san.

Otoharu asked what did he want for birthday present. Sougo said he wanted to watch Douglas videos with everyone.

Part 3

Ryuu once sent a photo of embarrassed Sougo to his senpais that makes everyone curious what kind of face he’s making right now

Gaku: Tsumugi, are you beside Ousaka now?

Tsumugi: No, I am not >

Yuki: What a shame, we’re curious what kind of face he’s making now.

Tsumugi: Just now, Tamaki-san said, “Sou- chan is desperately hiding his face, it’s as red as octopus now. I bet you’re talking about his photobook now, right?”

Sougo: Tamaki-kun, you can just say it directly to me……..

Ryuunosuke: I’m sorry Sougo-kun, it’s my fault that I sent your photo that time! I’m just happy that the serious Sougo-kun can show a lot of faces in front of us…

Momo: Ryuu, it’s bad to say things a player would say so naturally like that.

Tenn: It’s bad.

Ryuunosuke: Eehーーーー

Sougo: Um, what should I do, so that I can look so happy, surprised, and cry, just like everyone else?

Ryuunosuke: Sougo-kun…

Sougo: I do have emotions, and I think I can show it with my face. But somewhere inside me, I always see everything objectively. It’s frustrating, and holding me down…

Tenn: You don’t have to think about it so hardly, Ousaka Sougo. Now, there’s no one ordering you to be like that. You should just be honest with yourself.

Tenn: I’m sure everyone will accept you the way you are. They will stay with you, be happy, be surprised, and cry for you.

Gaku: If you can be so happy and cry of joy, your fans will definitely keep following you.

Yuki: There’s nothing to be afraid about. Just show it all to us.

Tsumugi: I’m sure you can be someone you wanted to be, Sougo-san.

Sougo: Everyone…

Sougo: To think that everyone thinks about me like this. I’m so, so happy, I don’t even mind if the earth is destroyed tomorrow.

Sougo: I will never forget about today. Just a little is fine, I hope I can repay everyone.

Part 4

Surprise Guest: Gou. Sougo’s old friend who gave Sougo a place to sleep before scouted by Otoharu.

Sougo sends gifts to him every month. “You don’t need to send those stuff, you can just show your face to me!”

Sougo watched horror movies almost every night, making Gou unable to sleep (lol)

Gou: I see, you’ve found your place, huh.

Sougo: Yes. It’s thanks to you, Gou-kun.

Gou: Like I can leave you alone that time! I don’t really know about IDOLiSH7 or MEZZO", but if you’re troubled, you should say it out loud.

Gou: There’s no one who will get angry even if you raise your voice now.

Sougo: Gou-kun, you’re so nice.

Sougo: I feel like, you’re similar with that boy.

Gou: Huh? I must go now, my part-time job is starting.

Sougo: Really, thank you very much.

Part 5

Tamaki: It’s 28th!

Tamaki: Gratzーーーーーーー

Sougo: Everyone, thank you very much.

Riku: Congratulations, Sougo-san!

Nagi: Congratulations, Sougo!

Iori: Congratulations.

Yamato: Congrats.

Mitsuki: It’s finally here!!

They gave him “HELL” tabasco, 55 BOTTLES.

Everyone’s making meals for Sougo while crying. They were wearing googles, and a mask for Riku, too spicy to handle.

Yamato: We look like we’re in hell.

Tamaki: It’s a payback for my birthday last month. Maybe he’ll hate red things if we make it super spicy!

Sougo: Wait, it’s so red it makes me kinda scared now….

Tamaki: We did it!!!!! Mikkii, make it more red!!!

Tsumugi gave him a red phone case with tabasco design.

Everyone arranged their hairs using hair ties, making 🌱on top of their heads. (Mitsuki: Yamato-san’s head looks like a pinapple wwwww)

Tamaki: Heyーーー let’s do that now!

Nagi: OK!

Riku: I already type it!

Tamaki: He’s my partner after all, I’m going to make him the happiest man in the world today.

Yamato: Hyu~ so cool, youngster!

Tamaki: Yama-san, don’t tease me!!!!!

Tsumugi: Okay then, please give Sougo-san your massages!

Iori: I am going first. IDOLiSH7’s kind hearted Ousaka-san, happy birthday. Please keep being on my side from now on. Lately, you often moved to their side (the ‘boke’ side), so I’m worried… No, it’s a good thing though… I hope you’ll always be my ally from now on.

Mitsuki: Next is me! Sougo, congrats! I always respect you who’s so kind, so strong, and dignified! Let me spoil you too from now on! I always want to know how to spoil you, you know!

Nagi: Dear Sougo. At first, I thought you were a moderate person, but it’s wrong now. You’re a Super Spicy Dangerous Boy. Please keep giving us your stimulation. We love you.

Riku: Sougo-san! Happy birthday!! I really like reading books and listening to music together with you! I’m so glad you’re here, Sougo-san! One more time, I really like you!

Yamato: I see you’re able to make a nice face lately, Sou. Congrats. You should be proud of your photobook. Please keep taking care of us from now on too.

Tamaki: To Sou-chan. Happy bday. At first, I thought you were not good with me. And I think you also thought that I was not good with you. But hey, Sou-chan, you said it too, right? we’re partners. You can rely on me from now on too, okay.

Sougo: What do I do

Sougo: Since I met everyone, everyday is a happy day.

Tamaki: Isn’t that nice?

Yamato: You still have many birthdays from now on, be prepared (lol)

Riku: I want Sougo-san to be more happy!

Iori: Yes. We all feel the same.

Nagi: Tamaki, shall we do what you kept asking us to do now?

Tamaki: Let’s do it!!!!

Riku: That, right!

Mitsuki: Oh, you mean that? ww

Tsumugi: I see! (lol)

Sougo: That?

Tamaki: 1, 2, 3!!

(Everyone’s saying ‘we love you’ to Sougo)

Sougo: ……………

Iori: This is a bit embarrassing.

Sougo: Thank you. I love everyone too.

Yamato: How should I put it,,,,

Mitsuki: When Sougo said it to us….

Yamato: It’s embarrassing..

Tamaki: Don’t get embarrassed!!!! We’re gonna lose then!!!!

Iori: Who are you fighting against!?

Riku: Tamaki, your face is so red! (lol)

Tamaki: Shut it!! Sou-chan is the king for today!

Tsumugi: You’re right! (lol) Alright then Sougo-san, your massages for the fans, please!

Sougo: Yes. Everyone, thank you very much for giving your time for me today. It’s thanks to everyone and my members that I can feel so happy in my birthday.

Sougo: Today, everyone said that they love me, I realized that receiving love is a really happy thing. That’s why, I will raise my voice, and say it back to everyone.

Sougo: I love you, everyone. Please treasure these feelings. And please, keep loving me too.　ー Ousaka Sougo.

Negan (17)

"Where the fuck do you think you're going?" Negan asks. I'm at my door. Just down the hall from his, as usual when we get back from a run. I just want to drop right now. Honestly. I'm so tired. "P-put mmy sssstuff back?" I ask. Brownie is hanging over my arm. Kind of like bird. Her head is on my hand, too. It's cute. I want to put her down on the bed so I can get food and a leash. Negan shakes his head. "You really don't fuckin listen when I talk, do you, Doll?" He asks. I frown. What is he talking about? Is he kicking me out? Did I do something wrong? IS it Brownie? He's making me move somewhere else because of the puppy? "You're staying in my fucking room until you can fucking move on your fucking own." What? With him? His WIVES don't even do that. They aren't allowed in his bedroom. He screws them in his office, in their rooms, but never in his bedroom. "Hurry the fuck up." He orders. "Put the fuckin dog in your room and get the fuck in here." Okay. I flinch and start into my room. Everything is just how I left it. So I put Brownie on the bed. On the pillow. She stirs, but she doesn't wake up. Which is good. She's so cute. I hope she doesn't mind being alone. Since NEgan probably won't let me bring her into his room. And what does staying in his room entail? Bed-bound for awhile? It's just staying down as much as possible. I can walk around. Obviously I can walk around. I can function. Why does he want me in there? Sex? Is he just going straight for it? I'm not ready for that. Not even close. SHIT. I have to pay him back for the puppy. Right? That's......I have to. It's how it works here. "Negan?" He's already in his room putting his stuff back. He looks tired. I won't come in more than just inside the doorway. He has a nice room. The bed is huge. Like bigger than any I've seen. Could probably fit like five people. And he has red blankets. Numerous red blankets. They're huge. They look warm and comfortable. His pillows are thin, though. Without sheets on them. They don't seem to fit. He has thee book cases, too. They're old, and a little damaged. The weight of the books is making a couple of the shelves bend down towards the middle. It looks pretty....dangerous. For the books, at least. And the floor is carpeted. Like a weird green soft carpet. Much different than my room. He has a table on the other side of the room from the bed. It's big enough for two people maybe. "What is it, Doll?" He asks. He's using the tone he only uses when he doesn't need to put on a show. It's his tired tone. He doesn't always have charisma. I look down at my feet. "Wwwwwhy-why-why-why- " Come on, Evelyn. You can do this. "Why a-am I....." "Staying my room?" He finishes. I just nod. "Because I fucking want you here. I can't keep a fucking eye on you in your own fucking room. You stay in here, you can't lock me the fuck out." He knows I lock my door? Does he try to get into my room or something? That's....weird? "You afraid I'm going to fucking try something?" He asks. Now he's standing right in front of me. Fuck thanks. You're making me feel really really small. I grab the strap on my bag as tight as I can before letting his question settle in my brain. Try something. Sexually. I shake my head. But then I sigh and nod. "Will you?" Fuck, get your stupid voice back, weirdo. "Probably. You say no, I'll fucking stop. For now you fucking rest. That's it. Put the fucking bag down wherever you fucking want. Then take a goddamn shower. Use mine." His? He has his own personal one, I remember now. It's connected to this room. On the left wall. I feel like if I move....I don't know. I just feel really stiff right now. Like...a little frozen, I guess. Nothing feels......right. I guess. I sort of feel in trouble. "Something the fuckin matter, sweetheart? Scared of little old fuckin me?" He asks. I flinch again, which probably answers his question. Fuck. Calm down. You're home. You can actually be a little more calm. You can calm down. You're safe. He said he wouldn't hurt you. "Shower." I mumble. Can't take my eyes off the floor now. Stupid me. I'm being stupid. I step around him and go to put my bag in a corner. I need clothing. Preferably something that'll cover my arms. Get the next week's worth of long sleeves, and hopefully check on Brownie. Too much to do today. I just want to collapse. It's so much. Granted, I wanted a fuckin puppy. This is my stupidity. My problem. "I got-gotta-got-gotta g-get......get a leash. And fffffood. Shhhower.....l-later?" I ask him. My bag, which is an old computer bag, gets set in the corner by the door to the bathroom. "Where the fuck do you think you're going to get a fucking leash?" He asks. I sigh. James. He'd know, right? He gets things. He knows how and where to get anything. He got me a necklace. He can find a leash. "I j-just...nnneed one. I-if I'mmmmmmm g-gonn-gonna wwwwalk-walk her. Sssssssssso shhhhe- " I feel like I can't breathe. You just gotta compartmentalize. You can take responsibility. You do it every time you go out on a run. Focus. Fucking focus. Or he'll get mad. Fuck that's not helping! "Leash......food.....w-walk, shhhhower. Sleep." I realize my eyes are closed then. Oh great, you look like a fucking freak. The tension is getting fucking worse. I open my eyes and force myself to look at him. He just looks confused as shit. Like....really confused. Fuck DARYL could decipher what I was trying to say. He's not Daryl. "I-I hhhhhave thhhhi-things. B-befffffffore I c-can show-wwwww-wer. L-like.....clothing?" I gesture down to my still cut up shirt. My arms are hidden by my coat, thankfully. "Sssssor-rry." I mumble. But I DO need clean clothing. He sighs heavily. "Hurry the fuck up, then. I want to fucking take a hot fucking shower." He mutters, heading towards his bed. Wait what? I frown, but brush it off. Doesn't matter, yet. Just get what you need to get done right now, done right now. One thing at a time or you'll get overwhelmed. Last time you let that happen, you nearly got your head cut off. Literally. "Thank you Negan." I rush, well about as much as one with a cracked rib and a whole their chest can rush, towards the door. "Anyfuckin time, Doll."

"J-james?" I ask quietly. He's in the kitchen making dinner since it's so late. Me and Negan got back just before sunset. Lucky us. Everyone is preparing dinner right now. It's weirdly dead in here. James, the head cook, and maybe five others? That's not a lot considering how many people are normally here. It's usually always buzzing. But they're playing music and no one's talking to each other. It's hot like always. Oh, they're cooking meat. Yay. Sounds like real fun, meat. Ugh. James is in the back doing the cutting. He likes cutting. Everything. It' his thing. "What?" He looks up from the current piece of red meat. Looks too serious, James. The only time he looks serious is when he's working or ranting. So a lot. But he see's me and his eyes go wide. "Evs!" The knife gets discarded on the small table he was using to cut, along with the meat being temporarily forgotten. "HUH! MMM!" I squeak. He's wrapped his arms around me and hugged me. We're about the same size, and he hugs around the stomach area. Cracked ribs and hugging really don't go hand in hand. At fucking all. "J-j- " Can't breathe. I am being stabbed. Holy fuck me. PAIN. PAIN. PAIN. PAIN. "I thought you were dead, Evelyn. Where the hell WERE you? Where the fuck have you been!" Why is he fucking yelling? Why do you have to yell? And squeeze. Fuck it hurts. It hurts. It hurts! I can finally breathe when he lets me go. Which is when I grab the table. FUCK YOU YOU DICKHEAD MOTHERFUCKER! "What the fuck did I do? Too strong?" He ass. He sounds like he's about to laugh. Ha ha, this is so funny. Hahahahahahahhaha fuck you. Fuck this hurt. Fuckity fucking fucker mother fucking shit-face. "Seriously, I thought you were dead. What the FUCK is wrong with you? Being gone so long without telling me. You always fucking tell me." Oh gosh. I'm sorry. I didn't exactly plan on getting shot. "I-I was.....hhhhurt." I shake my head. Pain is too much. It's gonna take a couple minutes to recover from that stupid fucking hug. "Hurt? Shit girl, you don't look hurt. What the fuck happened?" He asks. Good question. I hold back a groan. "Got shhhhot." I answer quietly. Thank the universe I changed my stupid shirt before I came out. It's too hot to wear my coat right now. But the long sleeve isn't so bad. Not once you get used to the heat. "Shot? You got SHOT? Who the fuck shot you? are you okay?" He asks. I just nod. "C-c-c-c-crrrr-crack-ck-cked rrrrrrib. Sssssor-ry I've b-been gone. D-didn't ex-ex-exact-tly p-pop-pop-pop-pop up on my cal-lllllender." I joke. He smirks for a moment, then frowns at me. "You're okay?" He asks. Okay is relative. My head nods. "How's....how-how's your week b-been?" Nice question. Really smooth. You're great at talking to people, Evelyn. "Shit. I've been worrying myself sick over you. For good reason, apparently. I can't believe you were shot. Negan have you locked up or something?" I shake my head. "Good. Well I'm happy you're better. Nothing else really happened around here. Negan's wife Yuma cheated. You should see what he did to poo Mick. The guy's face is like Dwight's now." He makes a weird face before shivering. I don't like imagining that. Negan pressing the iron to Mick's face. The flesh melting off. Bleh. "Jamie and Francis are going at it again. I haven't been able to make a good run. Negan tightened security. The asshole. Speaking of guards, do you want to have dinner with me tonight?" That was a definite change in direction. Have dinner? Like.....a date? I feel sick at the thought. Not because James, no. I just.....a date? It's not my thing. I don't even know how to do that. And I don't want to date James. He's my friend. I'd go as far as to consider him being my best friend. But if we date, he'll want sex. And he doesn't know about my past. He's never seen my scars. He doesn't know me. I don't want to see the look on his face when I refuse him, or when he see's me. I don't know how to talk right, I don't know what he's like, either. Nice or.....like the other men. I know that Negan is fun, and he can be serious. I've made my decision, and it wasn't made lightly. James isn't the guy I want to date. "Evs." I flinch when he snaps his fingers in front of my face. He has dimples when he smiles. Like.....deep deep dimples on his cheeks. The one on the right side of his face is slightly higher and deeper than the other. "Dinner?" he asks. I panic. "Uh......I-I-I ac-actu-actuallllly-ly hhhhhave.....I-I got a- I got-I got- uh a-uhh p-pup-pup-pup-ppy a-and I hhhhh-h-have t-to fffffffffeed her ffffffirst. A-and find-find her a llllllleashhhhhhhhh." He looks very confused. Which is why, around feed her, I panic even worse and continue talking. "A-and I-I-I-uh-I-uh- '' My rambling is cut off by him waving a hand through the air. "I am not understanding a fucking word, Evs. Talk slower?" He asks. Slower. Right. As soon as I can breathe again. Funny, my side is acting like a rubber band conditioning tool right now. Which is when someone has the rubber band on their wrist and snaps it every time they have a 'bad thought'. Only I 'snap myself' when I get panicked or stressed. And by snap, I mean I actually feel serious pain in my side. Courtesy of my stupid fuckin rib. "Co-come wwwwith m-me?" I ask him. It'd be easier to show him, anyways. He nods, and I begin to walk out of the kitchen. Funny how when I first got here I hid behind NEgan. Not that I trusted him back then, but I trusted him more than I trusted these people. Now I can almost tune out when I walk around. Tuning out meaning I don't feel as scared as before, but I still flinch a lot. And I hate having James behind me. It makes me nervous. I know he's watching me. It makes me hyper-aware of what I'm doing. My breathing is louder, my heart is louder, my walk feels uneven and loud. Since I'm focusing on my body so much, I over-focus. Everything feels new. Like I've never walked before. Do I go from my heel to my toe, or the side of my foot inwards, or my toe to my heel? None of them feel natural. And I can't regulate my breathing right, either. It's like....I'm not getting enough air no matter how I breathe. "Pup-puppy." I open my door and walk to the bed. Brownie is sitting up now with her tongue hanging out. She almost looks like she's smiling. but that vanishes as soon as she see's James. Once he's in the room, she jumps down and trots over to my feet. Then she sits. Right on my feet. It's cute. I love her. "Oh ho ho, I see how it is. You got yourself a dog. Nice. What's his name?" James bends down and gently holds his hand out in front of Brownie's face. "Her na-name is Brownie." I answer. he looks up at me as he pats her head. "Brownie, huh? Huh girl? That your name? You're such a good girl." He scratches just behind her ear and her eyes close. She tilts her chin up appreciatively, it looks like she's smiling. "So you can't come because you have a puppy. Why don't you bring her? I don't mind dogs." Oh. GREAT. I just......you're not going to give up. Are you? "Nnnnnnnnnnneeed-need-need to wwwwalk h-her. Neeeeed a leash." She seems to finally get it. "OH. That why you came to me today?" I nod. "Alright, well you need a collar, too. I think I might have a leash somewhere. I can look around for you, get back to you?" He asks before standing up. Thank you! "Please? That-that-that wwwwould be s-so great. Thank-ank- you." The grin that spreads across his face suits him well. "You Could bring her to dinner if you don't want to leave her here. I love dogs." He offers again. Never did I think he'd be so persistent about getting a date with me. If that's what he's asking. Which.....is scary. And I already said I want Negan. So.....I sigh. "I-I hhhhhhhhave t-to eat wwwwith N-negan. I'm sssssor-sor-ry Jam-james. His smile fades a little. Fuck I'm a jerk. I shouldn't...he shouldn't like me. I don't talk a lot, and I flinch. And I'm flawed. HE just shouldn't like me. It's a slippery stupid slope. "That's fine. Another time. I'll get back to you with that leash and collar. I bet I could get dog food, too." He jokes before closing the door. Dog food? "Hear that? Dog food." Sounds disgusting. She should eat real food. I kneel down and lift her into my arms. She's so tiny. Not at all heavy. And she smells. Se needs a bath. I'll take her to the community shower since Negan doesn't like her. That way it doesn't disturb him. Wait how late is it? Fuck it's too late. The women's time to shower is the morning. The men get the evening. The time in between is mute. Doesn't matter who showers when as long as it gets done. Or whatever. Weird rules if you ask me, but I won't complain. So her bath will wait until morning. Or afternoon tomorrow at least. I HAVE to get a walk in soon, too. It would suck if she went in here. That would stink, and the cleanup would be ridiculous. So food, then walk, then I'll go back to Negan and shower. "It's okay, Brownie." I pat her head as she gets a little wobbly on my arm. She seems to like sleeping like this when I carry her. Draped over my arm with her head on the back of my hand. It's adorable. I just gotta get her some food. "Oh, it's so cute." Marsha, the girl that hit me last week, or the week before, says. I'm now in the dining hall and people are staring. Yay me. I look around, adjusting Brownie in my arms, finding Negan at a table in the corner. He likes sitting there because he has a full view of everyone in the room. It establishes dominance. He doesn't see me, yet, not that I'd expect him to. So I just make my way towards the kitchen line. There's a three table 'buffet' type thing along the right wall of the room. It's always filled with food for everyone. But I don't take my food from there, usually. I get mine directly from the chef, safe as Negan. But tonight I grab a plate for Brownie before making my way back to the kitchen. "Hey Hun. I got your plate right here." Timothy, the head chef, says with a big smile on his face. He's always happy, like cooking makes him happy. I think he said something about being a chef before the apocalypse. Guess he's lucky he's here now. He's taller than me by two inches at most, and very lanky. Most people nowadays are. But his face is round. It seems like every chef, the ones I've read about and seen in movies, are round in the face. It's weird. Like it's a rule or something. He's got a white beard going around his face that looks way too easily groomed. His cheeks are always a light shade of red as well. But he always smiles like he's happy. "Thanks." I take the plate and stack it with Brownie's. She's looking at the food now with big eyes. Her nose keeps sniffing at it, too. Yeah I know, me too. No one says anything as I make my way to Negan. I'd like to leave and eat in my own room, but he wants me here tonight. I won't disobey him. It still makes my skin drawl knowing that most everyone is looking at me. Well, at Brownie, but same thing. A few people 'aw' and a few people laugh. There are few kids here, I never see or interact with them thankfully, but they're staring, too. This is too awkward. It's hard to focus on carrying everything, making sure Brownie doesn't get the food before we sit, walking, and knowing who's watching me all at the same time. I almost drop the plates, but just barely catches them. But this results in Brownie slipping from between my arm and my chest. "No!" I gasp, but she just slips down maybe a foot of space between me and the floor. Once she's down there she just looks up at me and starts to stick her tongue out while she breaths. At least she's okay. I smile at her and nudge her bottom so she'll go towards the table. "Negan." I greet while I sit. Brownie hops up next to me, but I have to pat the bench first so she knows. It's cute watching her jump up. It takes a few tries, but once she's up she's up. "Evelyn. Get what you needed to fucking get done?" He asks. I put Brownie's plate down by her before going to mine. "Mhm." I answer. He makes that weird face again. "Yes sir?" He's never wanted me to say that before. Ugh, I should never have said it in the first place. "Wwwwwhy......why d-do you on-only now wwwwwant m-me to say that?" I ask. Thank you, Tim, for giving me these amazing mashed potatoes. I love potatoes. I'd eat them raw if I could. And I have, before. The're so good. And he always puts like...some weird seasoning in them that makes them so much better. He's a very nice man. "Consider it fucking entertaining." He answers simply. Okay. Brownie is very much enjoying her piece of....rib? I think those are ribs. Smells good, that's for sure. I've never even had them before. "That fucking thing better not fucking shit in my fucking Sanctuary." He points at Brownie. She's still struggling with the ribs. It's very amusing. "I-I'm g-going to walk hhhhhher. T-twice d-day." That's what......uh......someone told me that. I just don't know who. Maybe I read it once? Honestly it's too much fun watching her try to eat. She keeps fighting with the meat. It's getting everywhere. I'll definitely have to wash her now. My plate is just filled with mashed potatoes and gravy, along with a few select vegies. I think. A sliced tomato, a full sliced tomato, some baby carrots, and cheese. It's a lot to eat, if I'm being honest. "You fucking vegetarian?" He asks a few minutes into eating. He has a full plate as well. Kind of like me and Brownie's plate combined, but it looks more...globby. The mashed potatoes are on the ribs, and the veggies are pushed to the side of his plate. I shake my head, though, to answer his question. "Then why isn't there any fucking meat on your fucking plate?" He's not, this is honestly just his version of casual conversation. I shrug it off. "D-don't-don't trussssssst th-the mmmmmeat. Don't rrrrreal-really like it o-on it's own. SSssssssssstir f-fry is pr-pretty g-good, though." I wish I could ask him a question that would be somewhat good. I'm no good at conversations. He usually starts them and ends them. I try to hold on, but sometimes I feel like I'm drowning. Like I NEED to say something, or ask something. Like now. I can't take my eyes from him because I feel like I NEED to say something. When I open my mouth to try to speak, he looks at me and Brownie barks. Which causes us to BOTH look down. "What?" I mumble-ask her. Oh. Wow. She picked the bones clean. Now she's....looking at me? What? Do you think you get more? I giggle at her when she bites the sleeve on my left arm and pulls. "You're cute. But I'm not done, yet." I mumble to her quietly. Yes, I can feel Negan staring at me. Strangely enough, this doesn't make me feel so weird that I have to stutter. Which is quite nice, actually. "Hey!" Brownie lets me go, and I jump nearly a foot in the air when Negan yells. He's glaring at her, not me. Fuck that was loud. Now the whole room is silent. Why'd he have to yell? She was just playing around. He looks at me, causing me to shrink in my seat and force my eyes away from his down at the table. He's mad. I'm inadequate. He hates everything about me. I'm a failure of a human being. You cannot have an attack right now. You absolutely can't. NO. "Evelyn." He's trying to catch my attention. I think. He's dipping his head down so he can get me took at him, but I can't. He's officially put me in a bad frame of mind. I don't feel safe. AM I safe? Did I do something wrong? "Fucking look at me, Doll." He orders. I close my eyes, trying hard to regulate my breathing. My heartbeat keeps getting faster and faster. Brownie crawls into my lap before I feel her paws on my upper chest. It's distracting enough to get me to look down at her. Is she okay? "B." I run a hand down her back a few times. Her fur is so soft, it's honestly ridiculous. Not fair she's this soft. Not a bit. "It's okay." I whisper to her. She sniffs at my neck for awhile after that. It's cute. I almost don't want to look away from her. She's very brown. I have to admit the one white spot on her forehead is vexing. After another few minutes I pick up where I left off with eating. Brownie stays just where is in my lap. Standing in my lap against my chest. Loving the warmth coming from her. Are all animals this warm? Is it just dogs? Maybe it's all. I dunno. But she's definitely warm. I definitely don't mind her being warm. If nothing else, it's relaxing. "You done?" Negan asks awhile later. The dining hall is beginning to empty out. I'm struggling to keep my eyes open. Don't think I've touched my food in a good few minutes. Brownie is adorably looking around without leaving my lap. "Mmmm." I answer with a nod. Then I catch myself. "Yes sir." Negan grabs my plate, and Brownie's since I put it on the table when she finished, and stands. "Take her back to your fuckin room. Then get to mine." He orders before walking away with all our plates. Okay. That's....a very sketchy order. He said if I want him to stop, to say stop. It's safe. I quickly grab Brownie and make my way out of the room. "It's okay, B. I'll see what he wants and come back for you. I'm gonna walk you so you can go. I promise." I kiss the top of her very soft head. She responds by licking my chin. Which is disgusting, but cute. It makes me giggle. "Stop being cute, weirdo." I mumble. She licks my chin again. Ugh, the sheer adorable-ness it killing me. And it sucks that I have to lock her in this room. I hate that. I wish I could stay here all night. Pet her, laugh with her. Make sure she fell asleep without nightmares. Do dogs have nightmares? Do they dream at all? Obviously they're nice, but....they can be mean. Will she grow up to be mean? Because right now she's curling up on my pillow, and it's....so cute. She's so cute. I hope she isn't mean when she grows. I could never hurt her. And I don't want NEgan to hurt her, either. "I love you. But I gotta go. Negan, he wants to be a good person. He wants to help us. I'm sorry he's so scary. But he's a good person. He is. He's nice. I'm sorry he yelled at you. Yeah I am. I am." I kiss her head again. "I'll be back. I promise, B. I'll be back. Just don't worry." I stand up, but I'm worried about her now. I'm worried about leaving her. I'm worried about everything. I shouldn't be, but I am. Did I do something wrong? Did Negan not want me to keep her? Does he hate me? Will SHE hate me? Am I bad? Do I deserve to get hurt for being like this? I'm sorry I'm such a failure, I don't mean to be. I just.....I'm sorry. I'll do my best to make sure you're okay, Brownie. I promise. And I'm going to be good for Negan, but I won't let myself get lost doing that. It's a promise I made when I left Ivan. After he died. I promised I'd never allow myself to lose who I am again. I'm not mindless. I'm not property. If he thinks I'm bad for this, then he should say something. But my soul purpose on this planet isn't to please him. It's just not. *Knock knock* Always knock before entering his office. That's just how it should be. "Come in." He calls out. Stop your hands from shaking. It's safe here. I close my eyes for a moment before entering his room. "Doll. About fucking time you got here. You take that fucking shower yet?" He asks. I feel guilty when I shake my head. "Mind fucking sharing this time?" Sharing? The shower? With you? I feel very cold a the thought. I have all my scars, though. He really wants to see me? Naked? I look to the bathroom before looking at him again. he's waiting pretty patiently. He's been waiting for six months. And he DID say he isn't that patient. "Uhm......sure." I answer quietly. Though I'm honestly very tired. And shy. And.....he's him. "About fucking time. Been waiting long the fuck enough." He mutters as he removes himself from the bed. Oh great. I just agreed to it. To taking a shower with him. Naked. And I know how childish he'll think it if I want to keep my underwear on. He knows better than to think I shower in my underwear. It's too late to go back now. Much too late. "You coming, Doll?" He asks. HE's already out of his shirt. Fuck. Just go. Get it over with. e's not them. He won't hurt you. He won't expect anything of you. He won't make you do anything. I am safe. "Breathe." I order myself. We're sharing a bed, we might as well share a shower. And if I don't want to do anything, I don't have to. So I won't. I won't. My shirt.....I keep pulling at the hem of it. Even when I get to the bathroom and he's got the shower started. I'm afraid to take it off. I'm afraid of what he'll see. What he'll think when he sees it. And what....what'll happen. Either way. If he likes it or if he hates it. I can't take my shirt off. So O postpone that by removing my pants. My black cargo pants that I hardly ever change. I only have three different pairs of pants. And my underwear is just shorts. Not panties or anything like that. If I wear any, it's shorts. "You getting fucking shy now?" He asks. I glance at him and flinch back into the wall. He's already fucking naked. And suddenly I feel nauseous. I haven't seen anyone naked since Ivan. I haven't been NEAR anyone naked since Ivan. And he beat me within an inch of my life. It hurt. He hurt me. He hurt me.

Notes: