[ @svnbleach, 🌳 ] taissa had been avoiding him since they returned, and she would claim it was unintentional, but it isn't. every time she looked at javi, she just felt confused. guilty, too, because for months now, she had already decided that the kid was gone, never to be seen again, and though she never allowed herself to grieve the youngest of their bunch, it felt even more surreal now to know that he was back, thanks to her. she didn't want the credit, because it meant she finally had to accept that there was something about her that was different — something that was more like lottie than she ever wished to be, and she still wasn't ready to accept that. but every time she made eye contact with him, she felt worse about her effort to avoid him, so finally, she tries to do something, hoping that it might help herself make some sense out of it all in the process.

❝  i have some wood scraps, ❞ she tells him as she moves closer, now purposefully avoiding his eyes, afraid that he'll look right through her the way it felt like he did the night she found him. ❝  — if you're still interested in making mini sculptures, that is. like the one you made for shauna, ❞ she points out, remembering a time when she was almost annoyed that that's how he was spending his time, but that feels silly now. ❝  i see you like drawing, too. do you . . . want to show me what you've been drawing? ❞ she asks, and that question is entirely selfish, an effort to learn something about him or herself or anything about how she found him and why, but she hopes that isn't so noticeable to him.

@svnbleach (javi) ♡'d the sc.

❝ HERE… ❞ SHE BEGINS TO SAY while removing the sweatshirt from around her shoulders and off her arms in order to hand it over to him. ❝ It's starting to get a bit chillier out there, this should help. Little bit, at least. ❞

two mugs of tea poised in my fingers , i wandered toward where javi was sitting by the window , extending one toward him with the faintest of smiles.                 ❛            i'm glad you're safe , javi. i knew you would be.            ❜            it was a strange feeling , holding that knowledge. it was hard to explain how i knew , just that i could sense it. like i could feel his heartbeat when i listened to the wind rattle through the trees , or hear his breath whistling through his teeth as he struggled through the snow to steal bear meat from the shed. i just .. knew.

carefully , i sank down onto the edge of the bench beside him , drawing my long legs in to fold beneath me , cradling my own mug between my palms , letting the heat burn through my gloves as i peered down at the tea. well , more like hot water with a few herbs , but .. it helped with the cold.                ❛            did you .. feel it out there ? the wilderness ? i can feel it inside the cabin sometimes , like .. a force i can't really comprehend , but .. you were out there in it for a long time. that must mean something.            ❜             i wondered silently if the wilderness spared him for a reason , if he was important somehow.

@svnbleach / closed starter for javi !