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#such loser childish energy like i do not even have the patience for it
femmesandhoney · 2 months
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could never be an actual politician bc the second anyone started raising their voice at me while debating something i would be like you're a child and this is ridiculous and yet the majority of voters (in america) would be like omg they were so passionate expressing their opinion omg they tore her apart even tho nothing was debated and i was just screamed at so they could evade the debate entirely like im tired that is tiring that is annoying
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cherdream · 5 years
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nct dream as a friend
this is how i see nct dream as a friend :)
renjun
the friend that goes M.I.A all the time because he prefers to be alone
is the photographer for all his friends because his aesthetics is everything
makes sassy remarks all the time
probably mutes all his group chats
is seen watching Buzzfeed unsolved every day
talks about supernatural things so often like “do you think the schools haunted?”
haechan: “shut up”
texts his friends about going to area 51
jaemin: “it’s just empty land, calm down”
chenle: “let's get our alien buddy!”
calls his friends idiots and is the only sane one in the group
tells his friends to do their homework before hanging out
mom friend
jeno
his friends have to forcibly drag him out of his house or else he ain’t going anywhere
stays up late at night playing video games with his friends
tries his best to be funny and his friends ain’t having it
is always on his phone and actually answers everyone back quickly
is hardworking so he’s always the last one to leave basketball practice
has a lot of patience
down for anything
renjun: “area 51?”
jeno: “area 51.”
haechan: “its 2 in the morning go to sleep!”
is always helping his friends with homework
the go with the flow type of friend
haechan
is a savage
jaemin: “i’m not coming to school today. i’m sick :(”
haechan: “thank god, i get a break from hearing jaemin’s voice today”
jaemin: “shut up”
chenle: “get better!”
is so playful and loves distracting his friends in class
like if you got haechan in your class be prepared to fail the course
is always asking his friends if they wanna skip class and gets sad cause no one agrees, calls them losers
has a bunch of memes on his phone just to roast someone
but always makes sure his friends don’t take his disses by heart
is so dramatic about everything
the drama queen friend
jaemin
probably is trying to kiss one of his friends
affectionate as hell and his friends hate it, especially jisung
sometimes doesn’t respond back because he needs to recharge from all the socializing he’s done
his friends are always seeing jaemin get confessed to
bakes cookies on special occasions
spoils his friends on their birthdays
the type to get matching things with his friends
jaemin: “let’s get matching bracelets!”
haechan: *haechan has left the chat*
jaemin: *blocks haechan*
is sensitive and gets petty
jisung: “i said i was sorry”
jaemin: “sorry doesn’t help sometimes”
jisung: “well i got attacked by a bee so it’s not my fault i spilled my drink on you”
jaemin: “then you shouldn’t have been drinking anything!”
jisung: “i can’t with you”
the dad friend
chenle
the friend that wants to go everywhere
chenle: “let’s go to that new flower shop!”
jeno: “dude, do you never go home?”
renjun: “i'm down”
buys expensive gifts for his friends
a lot of people are fake to him because he’s rich and he knows it
invites you to have a sleepover in his gigantic home
is always so cheerful and bubbly
tells you to look at the brighter side of things and his friends are just like “shut up”
gets babied by his friends cause of how childish he can be
the friend that doesn’t curse even though everyone around him does
the pure friend
jisung
the friend whos quiet at first but when he starts to open up, just straight up roasts you
finds his friends embarrassing but loves them a lot
wonders why renjun and him are the only ones with brain cells
haechan: “okay, who wants to skip last period today?”
jisung: “stop asking, you know we always say no, don’t be a nuisance”
haechan: “woah woah woah who hurt you?”
jisung: “i’m sorry being with you guys can be tiring, ya know?”
haechan: “hey!”
jeno: “i agree with jisung”
jisung: “jeno you’re the most boring one out of all of them, i have no energy after talking to you the most”
jeno: “i’m-”
cute dance battles with him and his friends
jaemin just loves to baby him
is always grossed out by his friends affection
is scared of everything so his friends just like to scare him all the time
the two-sided friend(but in a good way)
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soprana-snap · 7 years
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Magnolia Seven-Seven
Chapter One: Just Peachy
Summary: Magnolia is like every other city, full of traffic jams and hoards of people. When Captain Gajeel and Detectives Gray and Natsu get involved with a shady crime boss that seems to have the whole crime ring in his back pocket, they need a little more backup to bring him down: i.e ADA Lucy Heartfilia, Evidence Technician Levy McGarden, and Caffeinator Juvia Lockster.
Rating: M for adult situations and language
A/N: This is all Alisha’s fault. Blame @rivendell101 for this monstrosity. Buddycop!AU conceived after eating 22 Reese’s and no sleep...after how many months of not writing. 
Gray mentally promised to strangle whomever decided shove glitter and peppermints down this car’s dashboard vents. It wasn’t even hot out and yet the car smelled of mint and tiny rainbow glitter blinded him if he turned his head the wrong way.
Plus it made the dashboard look like a wayward unicorn shat all over.
Of course his captain got first pick of the undercover cars and of course he picked the coupe, leaving them with the SUV with the atomic glitter explosion all over. He wondered if there was regrets, anger, maybe bitter acceptance when the poor soul turned on the defrost and met his sparkled fate. At least the car forever smelled of peppermint, the candy caked into the bowels of the car for eternity. No amount of body odor or bad burritos can ever clear it. He turned the air conditioning to maximum.
“Batman can totally beat Aquaman. Remember he is the night AND a billionaire.”
Oh, right. Before his intense pondering of the dashboard, he and his partner had been in an intense debate.
Natsu Dragneel. Gray had no way to explain him properly. Who could? He supposed Natsu felt the same way about him, despite being rivals in the academy. Pink hair aside, the man had grit for an idiot. He was the only one Gray would trust with his back...and their captain too.
“Nah, Aquaman has Batman beat.”
Natsu tensed, flashing his signature ‘eat shit’ look. It was kinda like a constipated face, but with more rage in his brows. Honestly, how did he make Detective? He was a bag of half eaten, dusty Reese’s: useless to everybody and, with as much affection as Gray could muster, totally gross in theory.
“You know what Gajeel said. ‘Back up yer opinions’,” he said, mimicking Gajeel’s gruff tone. Huh, he even did the little lip curl characteristic common for Gajeel. “So, back your wrong opinion up.” He changed the A/C dial back to maximum heat.
Gray curled his lip and wrinkled his nose. Patience is key, he told himself. Plus, the captain would kill him if Natsu ended up dead before they could make the arrest. He tossed a glance to his left, toward the alley that was where everything was supposed to be.
“Well, Aquaman can control the animals in the ocean,” he tried, knowing full well it was a half baked answer. They were both getting antsy, like bloodhounds waiting for the trumpet to signal the hunt. He turned the A/C back to full cold. The unit within the dash gave a tired rumble, but held on.
Natsu rose an unimpressed eyebrow, but Gray caught the subtle glances towards the alley and the anxious leg bobbing. The car was starting to shake too from the increasing force, the leftover bottles and cans of 5-hour energy rolling too.
He mentally promised to strangle whomever used the car last. He didn’t miss the bags of fast food tossed into the back or the forgotten Taylor Swift CDs. Someone either had an open addiction to Tay Tay or was hiding the evidence of it. Either way, the car was a pig’s sty.
“And?” Natsu prompted, reaching over and turning the A/C dial back to maximum heat.
“He can drown trying to fight Aquaman.” ‘Duh’, he wanted to add, but when the captain was gone, he was in charge. Natsu had a nasty habit of playing disappear and bust the suspect alone if he wasn’t watched. The A/C was back to cold in a flash.
“Uh, billionaire? He can buy a submarine, go down and torpedo Aquaman, then eat whatever sushi he likes!” He then chuckled, “Batmarine.” When he turned the A/C to heat this time, there was a low clunk in the car.
Gray switched it back to cold before the unit could even scrape up enough warm air. “Aquaman can make a creature eat the sub--including Batman!” The inside voice was forgotten, the stir crazy pair now unleashed.
“Can not! Whatever it is can just poop him out! Plus, he can kill it from the inside!” Natsu argued, turning the dial back to heat. The car’s engine shuddered but still idled softly.
“Fine! The giant squid can crack it open like a pistachio and then Aquaman can feed Batman to an orca or shark! Baddabing, he’s dead!” At this, he turned the dial ruthlessly to cold and popped the plastic out of the socket, leaving just a metal stub. Suck it Natsu, he thought. Serves him right for leaving his weights out on the floor and making me and Gajeel clean them up, he added pridefully.
Natsu looked like he swallowed something foul, his eyes nearly crossing as he puffed his cheeks, probably choking on his defense but realizing it wasn’t good enough. Gray kinda hoped he choked so he could get a good laugh. He hastily dug into his breast pocket, pulling out his smartphone.
“And don't even think about Googling it,” he added sharply.
“...Fuck off, Gray.” Natsu decided after  scowling hard enough to make a squirrel lose its fur. The man crossed his arms, sticking out his bottom lip and turned away to stare angrily out the passenger window.
“That may work on Lucy, but I still think you are a loser.”
That earned him a solid punch in the shoulder that started an all out slapping fight. Hands were flying, slapping at anything in their path. If they were to lay low, it was too late now, the gloves were off.
.
.
.
He had to have the largest fucking migraine on the continent at the moment. It was bad enough that he had to pretend he didn’t, but his two numskulls forgot they both were wearing microphones that dual transmitted right into his eardrum. It was safe to assume they weren’t listening to his relays either, judging by the constant shuffles and sounds of curses.
He could manage through their childish games: like Rock, Paper, Scissors and I spy. He could manage with the sounds of them chewing on whatever the hell they had in the car. He could even deal with their subpar debates on superheros. But this was total pain. Maybe he was hearing them all the way in the warehouse without the microphone!
“Shut up.” His own voice sounded raw from the irritation boiling through his body. He could hear them silence, the static crackling at their startled breaths. “Take this seriously.”
“Excuse me?”
Only years of experience with his old man prepared Gajeel for this. The straight face. The harsh growl in his demands. Weaker men have caved with less. Still....a theft trade bust was not the place to use these skills.
The brat looked like the damn wind could prance by and carry him away to the land of Oz or something, nothing but skin and bones with bruises as accents. Not one doubt entered his mind that this runt was high school age, a dropout most likely. Yet, his brown irises were shadowed with black eyes, his nose broken a few times too. A brawler beaten too many times by the world.
“I said shut up and take this seriously. I wanna buy your shit but I ain’t got the whole Bank of Magnolia.”
Nice save, Natsu praised in his ear.
Fuck off, peanut gallery, Gajeel answered in his mind. Honestly, when Makarov first assigned two upstart detectives under his command, he had his concerns. Now, it was headaches but whatever. If they messed up this bust they’ve been marking for weeks, he’d tan their hides himself.
The kid blinked, hesitation finally making an appearance on his face. Ah, so he did have some self preservation.
Time to switch tactics. Back to the basics, as he would tell the knuckleheads.
Before the runt could gather his bearings, Gajeel made his switch. He forwent diplomacy and straight into intimidation.
The kid’s coat felt like it hadn’t been washed in years, the fabric crinkling like tin foil. Something smelled nasty too, body odor soaked in skunk probably. He wished his nose would take a hike to spare him as he brought the kid near his face, flashing his teeth.
“Listen, I ain’t got all day and all the money in the world. So, I’ll make it simple. Point me to the procurer of these gizmos and I’ll leave ya be.” The way the kid shivered and his eyes shriveled in fear was nearly intoxicating.
Fear. The law of the world. At least, the underbelly of the world.
“Look man, I’m just doing what my boss says. I don’t want no trouble!” As if it would placate the situation, the kid showed his palms, empty and in surrender. Like him, Black Steel Gajeel would ever accept such a surrender.
“Do me the solid and point ‘im out for me.” The growl that came from his throat brought back memories, flashes of frightened eyes and darker days. “I don’t want a small fry like you but you’re making me late for an appointment.”
Intimidation.
Metalicana taught him this from day one, back when the path was so long and crooked. Of course, that was back then and he was different now: A changed man.
When the kid frantically gestured to his side, but subtle so that it looked like he just twitched, the glee melted away to cold self loathing in an instant. His grip relaxed, the boy’s feet touching back to concrete. Acid burned the back of his mouth. It had been months. He thought he had himself under control.
The academy didn’t beat it out of him after all.
“You need Wheaties,” he settled with, adjusting the flap of the hoodie with a gentle pat. “And an education.” Maybe some deodorant too.
“Huh?” Honestly, this kid’s brains was probably melted by the sheer stench of urine in this dump. Still, Gajeel breathed in and out. Zen. Levy always told him to find his happy place.
“Go back to school. There are better places to be than in this business, kid.” Jeez, what was he, the brat’s mentor? “Go back to school or I’ll find a way to tie a knot with yer scrawny legs.” There. Let it never be said that he wasn't a good motivator: this kid looked ready to faint from sheer inspiration.
Out of the corner of his eye, Gajeel saw him. Tall, dark, and suspicious with his head down and eyes avoiding everyone in the warehouse. His hands fiddled within his pockets, an unlit cigarette resting on his lips. Typical asshole type.
Now, he had no tip on the big man behind the job, but this guy definitely looked the type. Plus, every few seconds, the guy looked around, nodding to a few cronies handling crates and boxes.
It had taken months to set this little raid up, even longer to learn that there was seismic activity on the streets. More drug busts, more thefts, more violence in general. Magnolia wasn’t that happy little city portrayed on the sun bleached welcome signs, but then again if the tourists fell for that little charade, shame on them.
But, this was his town, Levy’s town, his partner’s town. They’d be damned if they let some high horse punks try and run these streets outside the law. As Captain of the detective unit, Gajeel could proudly state he was going to mow these criminal’s asses like grass.
Still, his two knuckleheads were whispering on the mic now, stray words Gajeel was able to catch. “Poor guy...sad...appointment...stood up.”
Idiots. He used to flush the heads of morons like them in the toilets and then steal the lunch money they stole from somebody else. What was it called again? The social food chain?
It was then that the rays of understanding dawned on the undercover cop. He was still standing there, next to a kid about to wet his pants and break out in stress acne. The job was supposed to be inconspicuous, blending, and eventually cracking down. Yet, here he was daydreaming.
He left the pale kid behind, strolling along the stacks of crates stamped with different cities and countries, bold black ink on the wood grains. Cedar, Crocus, and even Balsam? Just where and who is pulling the strings to this size of an operation? Definitely not Captain Crunch over there. No real boss ever wore aviators from the Dollar Tree...the tag still on.
At that moment, time slowed, and their eyes met momentarily.
Levy always talked about those sappy books she tried to hide from her supervisor on the job. The ones where two main characters eyes lock and time slows, butterflies began to flutter in the stomach and a little thing called love at first sight took flight.
Well, first, this was a two take on the punk’s side. He looked at Gajeel, looked back down, and jerked his head back up to gape.
Second, the butterflies in Gajeel’s stomach were on fire and armored with iron steampunk spikes, chanting war cries as they sent the molten metal through his limbs as he felt the instinctual urge to surge into chase. They were blood thirsty, manly little butterflies.
Third, there was no love taking flight at first sight. It was Gajeel’s suspect taking flight at second glance, barreling through the warehouse like Levy did when she saw a spider.
Chicken, Gajeel thought as he swore, bolting after the guy with a few seconds lag.
.
.
.
“Okay, for the final one hundred points, and the honor of skipping dish duty for a week-” Gray said, beginning his drum roll of fingers on the dashboard, “-Natsu, you must partake in the Trial of Tenacity!”
Natsu grinned brightly, punching into his palm. “All my training has led up to this moment. Witness me!”
“Witnessed,” Gray agreed, unable to stop the smirk from cracking his face.
With that, Natsu inhaled deeply, puffing his chest out and tightening his belly. Then, he began to belch. “A, B, C, D-” he paused. “E,” he faltered, licking his lips and scowling at the parking meter outside. “F, G, H, I-”
“Idiots!” Gajeel’s voice crackled over the mic, “I got a runner!”
“Oh shi-” Gray hissed, fumbling with the door handle. He was also going to strangle whoever put a ‘purrr-fect’ sticker on the car’s handle. What were they, five and playing pretend cops n’ robbers?
Natsu was already on it, throwing his door open and lunging out with it. Too bad he didn’t account for the light pole next to the car. The noise of the door hitting the wooden pole was enough to make someone cringe, but the sound of Natsu’s forehead smacking into the window as a result was hilarious.
Gray almost peed himself as he stumbled, nearly tripping on the sidewalk at the noise. It was a shame. He expected a hollow thunk.
Disappointment aside, the solid burn of his previously cramped legs leaving trails of fire. It took about three strides to get momentum, but then Gray felt everything click.
Running wasn't really his thing. It never was until he joined the force. To be honest, Gray missed his high school days on the winter sports teams: skiing, snowboarding, ice skating, those kinds of things.
          But, he hid the trophies for the ice skating in storage. Heaven forbid his partners finding out, even if he was graceful as fuck on ice skates.
          “I'm coming around the back! He's gonna shoot out the east alleyway,” Gajeel’s voice cracked in the earpiece.
          Which way was East? Which way was North? Dread filled his lungs. Never eat soggy wheat, but which direction was never!?
“Turn right at the crosswalk, icicle!”
          There was Natsu, finally up and sprinting along with him. It didn't surprise him in the slightest.      
          Unlike him, Natsu was a track star before the force, a competitive force of nature that tended to be too competitive at times. Times like, but not limited to, taking the longest shower even when the hot water was exhausted.
          “How's the head?” Gray managed to say between breaths, taking his turn too soon and scraping his shoulder on the corner of the brick building. Ouch. “Still have a brain?”
          “Har Har. Just keep up, will ya?” Natsu replied, far more casual than he normally would. This was suspicious until he pulled ahead in a full sprint, feet barely staying on the ground for two seconds.
Gray would have been impressed...if it wasn't for the words Natsu was grunting into the mic as he went.
“Dude, is that the lyrics from Cops?”
Bad boys, bad boys...it was!
“Shut up! It makes me run faster!” Indeed, he was pulling ahead.
“Oi, morons! Here he comes!”
Instantly,  a pair of plastic garbage bins tumbled out of the mouth of an alleyway to the right, sounds of shattering glass making a few pedestrians freeze. Then, out came the ugliest looking man Gray had seen in living memory.
White hair tangled in knots, skin leathery and eyes sunken in, an old man staggered over the rolling bins, took one look at them, and sprinted away with inhuman speed.
“What drugs is he on?” Natsu squawked, nearly tripping over the cans himself as he hurdled over them.
“Catch him and we’ll find out!” Gajeel hissed, sounding much more out of breath than they were. They warned him about skipping cardio day, but did he listen? Nooo.
Not that Natsu or himself would ever draw attention to the captain's lack of stamina. A laugh caught in his throat. Especially around Levy.
Old Man Nasty could run! Gray had a hard time believing that he made it down two blocks before they were halfway gaining on him.
Well, he made it harder by throwing people and garbage cans in their paths. Gray had already caught up with Natsu, neck and neck as they closed in.
They may have ran over a little old lady with a cane, everything was a blur so he wouldn't remember.
It took five blocks, but Old Man was still an old man. Gray took the lunge just as Natsu did, both tackling the guy so hard they crashed right into a wooden fruit stand.
“Ehey what are ya’ll doin’ tuh my peaches?!” someone shouted near Natsu’s ear. Of course, he was sort of busy wrangling their suspect down while Gray recited the Miranda Rights with handcuffs.
That was how Gajeel found them, knelt and covered in mashed peaches with an irate vendor screaming like an angered TV star. Maybe he was going to explode judging by the color of his face. He didn't want to risk watching to see if he did.
It became sort of a ritual after every bust. The Captain sighed, flashed his detectives a ‘we will discuss this later’ look, and forked over a wad of twenties from his pockets to silence the vendor before his migraine became nuclear.
.
.
.
Magnolia 77th precinct wasn't a glamorous place. The drywall was at least 49 years old, the tiles discolored from various cleaning supplies, the ceiling missing squares. It smelled like an old building, and it was. There were still secret closets from back in the prohibition era although they weren't used for illegal booze anymore.
           Magnolia 77 wasn't pretty, it probably had some modern day code violations, but it was home. Natsu had always thought so. He crashed at his desk sometimes, ate meals from the vending machine, and shaved in the gym showers. By all accounts, that meant he lived here.
          So, bringing in baddies to this ‘temple’ always gave him a sour taste in his mouth. Or, it could be the peach juice still oozing from his hair.
           Erigor, the guy he and Gray suffered much pain and embarrassment to catch, seemed indifferent to the majesty of the lobby. Actually, he turned up his nose, revealing the bit of peach still lodged up there in the left bat cave. No respect for poor historical building upkeep. Criminals these days.
          Gray held onto Erigor’s left arm, Natsu keeping tight on the right while Gajeel brought up the rear. It made this six legged, sideways cha cha line hard to fit through the revolving door, but with a little wiggling and sliding real smooth, they all ended up in the lobby in one piece, just peachy.
          Then, when Natsu got a good look around, gravity faltered for just a moment. His mouth went dry, his heart thumping against his rib cage. For a blink, the Earth stopped turning.
          Be still his heart.
There she was, in that white blouse and gray pencil skirt, a purple scarf around her neck today. Her arms were filled with folders, a briefcase slung by a strap over her shoulder.
          She rose a golden eyebrow, an amused smirk crossing her glossed lips, “Wow. I see you boys got into a sticky situation.”
          Damn, her quick quips never stopped taking his breath away.
           Gajeel grunted, taking a moment to scoop some slime from the back of Gray’s uniform and flicked it at her playfully.
           She dodged quickly, standing aside as the captain took Erigor from them and made the march up to the counter.
          “This is no time for puns, Lucy...even good ones.” Gray said as he shook his arm and slopped peach guts all over the floor.
          Natsu, however, pulled a half squashed peach from his trouser pocket, grinning stupidly as he offered it to her. “Sweets to the sweetie.”
          Lucy, bless her, managed a small hint of amusement under her cringe. She pulled the folders close to her chest and Natsu felt unreasonable envy of the plastic and cardboard.
          “Never been a fan of peaches, sorry.” She glanced down, probably to inspect that her shoes were not stepping in juice, missing Natsu’s deflated look.
          “Well, I should get back to my office. Bye Gray...Natsu.” With a dainty hand, she tucked a strand of hair behind her ear, walking away with her head bowed and eyes to the floor in determination.
          Assistant Deputy Attorney Lucy Heartfilia, someone that everyone loved to see around the precinct and every criminal learned to fear in the courts.
          Once she was gone, Gray whistled lowly, placing a solemn hand on Natsu’s shoulder. “Sorry man. I think she only has love for justice and platonic relationships. You might not get anywhere with her.”
Natsu, still watching the doors where Lucy was last seen, closed his eyes and let a small smile cross his lips. With a steady hand, he slid the peach back into his pocket, ignoring the way it squelched. “Nah man. She has a lot of love to give but a lot to lose too. She’s worth waiting for,” he said softly, almost sagely as he tenderly sighed towards the doors.
Gray crinkled his nose. Over the years, Natsu was always a conundrum. One second he’s sappy and pretty damn perceptive, the next-
“Hey, wanna stick dirty socks in Elfman’s locker? He still hasn’t changed the locks~”
-the next, he was an absolute asshole.
“Sure, I got some that I’ve been perfecting for weeks.”
Hey, he never claimed to be a saint either!
.
.
.
“Another job well done, Redfox.”
Gajeel couldn’t help but let the grin cross his face as he shoved Erigor to Erza and Milliana, the best detention officers on the force, nearly laughing at Erigor’s stumble into the women’s hands. Truly, he had no beef being on the streets, little wimp.
“Milli, take him to the cells while I talk with Redfox.” Erza said evenly, in that commanding tone that was a basic being for her. Her red hair shimmered behind her as she turned, pressing the buzzer that unlocked the door to proceed further into the building. Milliana, gripping Erigor by the arm, hustled him through and disappeared behind barred windows.
“The chief and I are very impressed with your record lately. Although, we do have concerns about the two greenie detectives you cart around with you. Somehow, you get the job done despite being saddled with hooligans,”  she said dismissively, eyes sharp as she took in the peach mush on the floor and still smeared on his vest.
The praise and backhanded snub at his team rolled off his back like water on a poncho, him not having the energy to get riled up in defense of his two rookies. After all, they did smear him in peach juice today.
“They were top notch in the academy, prodigies, hence achieving detective as soon as they entered the force. They are both excellent in hand to hand combat and sharp strategists. I wouldn’t expect someone outside this team to see it.” Okay, maybe the insults to his guys didn't go over as easily as water off his back. They were his morons, after all.
Erza, despite the rumor that she’d rip out your spine if you got snippy with her, smiled easily with a shrug. “As expected of the greatest team on the force, the Captain defends his team.” She sounded strangely pleased, as if he had passed a test of hers.
When her expression slipped into something more sly, then Gajeel felt nervous and twitchy. Sly Erza was worse than angry Erza.
“So...still coming over on Tuesday? With the skillet-?”
Oh. NO. Channeling his inner five year-old, he whipped his finger to his lip and shushed her. “Yer sworn to secrecy, Red. Remember?”
At his old academy nickname for her, she smirked. “Of course, Steel,” she replied easily.
He relaxed, opting to roll his shoulders out and groan at the cracks of the joints. “Well, I’m gonna round up my clowns and head out for the day. Maybe get them some shawarma. They did get the peach bomb worse than I did.”
She nodded, already turning away with a wave. “Alright, keep your phone on. We still have to book this guy on something that will stick.”
.
.
.
“Erigor’s down. Got busted by the cops.”
A man runs his fingers through his hair. “This news is very displeasing.”
With a bored manner, he picked at his shredded cuticles, licking his lips. “Then tell Lyon I expect his shipment on time. Remind him what will happen if my calendar suffers another...setback.”
The chair he sat in creaked as he shifted, shined shoes coming up to rest on a nearby desk.
“Which reminds me...take care of the loose end before he gets...chatty.”
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everlarkficexchange · 7 years
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The Misunderstanding Part Two
Prompt 41: Katniss and Peeta are strangers/or enemies at a theme park. They end up sitting next to each other on a ride before it breaks down and they can’t get off. [submitted by @peetaspikelets]
Special Thanks to @lovesbiggerthanpride for betaing this story and for making better.
Prompt 41: by @mega-aulover
Rated G
The Misunderstanding Part Two.
PART 1
July 4, 1945 
Katniss closed her eyes - she needed a nap. The summer heat of July had gotten to her. Many hoped for a cool wind for the celebration for Independence Day. The mood of many was jubilant as the 1945 Fair was a smash, with the knowledge that the war was coming to an end. The Germans were beat and they had hopes that the Japanese would soon surrender.
Katniss was knackered. She spent all of her energy during the day competing against Peeta Mellark, her nemesis, to prove a point. At eighteen, Katniss had her whole life ahead of her, and could even go home back to England, now that the war was over in Europe. After her sister had told her to give Peeta a chance, she was frustrated. Somehow, she fell asleep. She woke when she felt a shadow fall over her.
“Prim,” she murmured, sleepily thinking perhaps it was her little sister who came to wake her.  “Go away.”
“Katniss,” the masculine voice called.
Her nose twitched as she picked up the pleasant aroma of cinnamon and dill. She sighed happily and a soft smile came to her sleepy face. This had to be one of those dreams where she ended up kissing Peeta. Katniss loved those dreams - Peeta actually liked her.  He had eaten her steak and kidney pie and had fallen in love with her.
Her dreams were a secret fantasy that not even Prim knew. But as she lay there, she could hear the District Fair sounds in the background, the big band was playing Tommy Dorsey’s “Alone.” The screams of men and women as they whirled around on the fair rides filled the air as well as the monkey organ playing the infamous circus music.
Katniss recalled she wasn’t at home lying in bed. Instead, she was underneath a tree.
Her eyes flew open to see Peeta standing over her with a bag and a cup. His handsome face held a smile and his blue eyes took in her still form. It felt intimate and far too familiar for Katniss. She immediately stood up, to face him.
He didn’t react the way she expected when in an argument with a man. In the past, whenever she became defensive or argued with Haymitch he’d kick over buckets, and throw his fists in the air. Gale used his physical stature to intimidate her. Katniss was always a little afraid of Gale when he ranted and raved in the woods. She normally didn’t argue, but there were occasions when she fought back and he’d puffed his chest and pointed his finger in her chest.
Peeta was not like other men. He stood there looking like a lamb with big blue innocent eyes as she advanced toward him. Katniss noticed for the first time today just how small and diminutive she was against his bigger bulkier frame.
She wasn’t exactly bothered, nor was she frightened by the sheer size of his chest or width of muscular arms. If anything, something within her coiled with pleasure. She wanted to be held by him instead of fighting him. This visceral sensation caused her to lose her scowl. Katniss wondered why she was so attracted to him. Why every time she was feet away from him she couldn’t help but sniff his scent.
She straightened her back and squared her jaw. “What do you want?”
Peeta gave her the space she needed to rightened her clothing. The golden ticket she won fell to the floor.
They both reached for it at the same time. Their hands brushed up against the other. Katniss jumped back, feeling an electrical current.
Peeta became chatty as he picked up the ticket, while balancing the white paper bag and the cup in one. “That was amazing the way you won the ticket. You shot the balloons without even glancing at them for too long.”
Distrustfully, Katniss took the ticket from him as he prattled on. Once more Prim’s words came to her mind. Peeta stood politely, waiting for her to respond once he finished speaking. He was a gentleman. Even during the competition he never lost his patience, never acted petty when he lost, never called her names, he never laughed at her or made fun of her. If Gale were in Peeta’s place, he would have done one or more of those things. Gale was a sore loser.
Prim was convinced he could never have thrown out her pie without a reason and wanted Katniss to speak to Peeta about it. Her sister insisted it was not in his personal make to do something unpleasant.  Katniss wanted to curse out her sister for putting that idea in her head. She didn’t want to be nice to him, because Peeta was the one thing she’d have to yield to him.
“I thought you would be hungry. I noticed you spent your money on the games.”
Katniss became irrationally mad. “No, thank you,” she testily said and brushed away from him, heading for the fairgrounds, desperate to put space between them. Prim wanted her to find out why he’d thrown the pie away, made her promise. Katniss didn’t want to complete her promise to her little sister. It would mean he would have to deal with the stuff she kept buried.  She ran, but Peeta chased her. He had a heavy gait and she could hear him coming after her.
“Why do you hate me?”
His question caused her to stop. She stopped walking, her chest heaving from anger. Through clenched teeth she asked, “What makes you think I hate you?”
“You avoid me, and if looks could kill I’d have an arrow struck through my eye.” Peeta stood with his hands in his pocket. His face was flushed and his blond hair fell over his eyes.  
Katniss cross her arms across her chest defensively.
“I know you have deadly aim; my dad showed me a few of the squirrels that you sold to him. You shot them straight through the eye, and sometimes I think in your eyes I’m nothing but a squirrel.”  
Peeta was charming, and comparing himself with a bushy tailed varmint made her want to smile. She tore her eyes away from his handsome face and focused right over his shoulder at the Ferris wheel. “What do you want?”
Peeta shook his head and chuckled, “I came to give you some cheese-buns and some cold apple cider. That’s all, thought you might be hungry.” He extended his hands with the food.
Katniss took the offered food, “Don’t worry I’m not going to throw it out.” The act of the food sharing brought back the rejection she felt when she was young girl. With a clenched jaw, she spat, “I don’t throw out gifts, unlike you.” She turned around to walk away.
He looked surprised right as she pivoted. “Wait, Katniss,” he shouted, but she kept on moving. He sounded exasperated as he walked behind her, “What do you mean by that?”
Pressing forward, Katniss noticed the crowds had thinned out. Towards the stables for the prizes - the best in show for animals, the best in the pies and preserves, and the barbeque competitions. Katniss kept walking straight not wanting to confront Peeta. She hoped he would leave her alone.
“Katniss,” Peeta said reaching to put his hand on her shoulder. It was a light touch, not forceful but she felt it all the way to her toes.
She stopped moving, “Stop following me, please…leave me alone.”
“I want to know why you’re so hostile towards me. Why you hate me?” Peeta’s hands were remained on her shoulders, lightly gripping them. His eyes were wide as if desperate.
This stare of his confused her. There were times she swore he stared at her as if he liked her. This thrilled her and made her upset. She spat, “Haven’t you heard that I’m hostile and frosty?”
Full of anger, Katniss was unable to communicate why she disliked him so much. In the same manner why she couldn’t explain why she was so attracted to him. Katniss took a different tactic; her voice became haughty and it dripped with sarcasm. “Actually, I would’ve gotten along with your mother, a woman that isn’t above hurting her own children. We’re the same ill-mannered vain evil creatures.”  Her face fell even after she said it. She could see the hurt in his eyes.
Peeta’s mother had passed away two years ago. She had taken ill and had never recovered. It was shock to the family but it was also a relief. Although it was wrong to speak of the dead, Peeta’s mother was known as the witch. She was unilaterally mean to every single person in town and she was dreadfully harsh on her family. The Mellark boys were known for the marks to their arms and faces.
Those who went to the funeral went as a show of respect for Mr. Mellark and his sons. There really wasn’t any sympathetic regard for Mrs. Mellark; she was not a nice woman. Katniss felt because of her scowl, many pegged her to be like Peeta’s mother. Her words hurt him and she could see it in his saddened blue eyes, and she felt shameful for her behavior. “I’m sorry that was low.”
He turned pale.
Katniss ran past him, clutching the food in her hands. Primrose was right; she should have just simply asked him why he’d thrown out her gift. Had she’d not been so stubborn and headstrong, she wouldn’t have just injured him. She couldn’t handle the guilt.
She ran desperately straight for the Ferris wheel. The line was short, since it was dark now and many people were now heading for the lawn to see the fireworks.  She still had her prized ticket and expected to take this ride tonight under much happier circumstances. It was the perfect opportunity for her to get away and put her thoughts in order.
“Ticket, Miss,” The young man requested.
Katniss nodded, she shuffled the cup from one hand, to the other that held the paper bag, to give him the crumpled ticket.
“Thank you,” the young man smiled.
Katniss swallowed but couldn’t bring herself to smile as she walked into the waiting area. The sights and sounds became too much for her. The lights of the fair blurred all around her. Her childish irritation ate at her. She’d graduated school, survived bombings in England, and helped her family come to the safe shore of America. She questioned why she couldn’t find it in her to forgive a boy who had always been nice to her.
“Katniss.”
At the sound of Peeta’s voice, her lashes fluttered closed. Katniss could smell his scent as his stood very close, causing her knees to shake.
“Come along,” The young man called.
There was no escaping Peeta now as they were put into one of the cabs. “Please make sure to put your safety belt on.”
Katniss obliged as she put the food on the floor. She looked out of the window as the wheel ascended slowly. Her hand gripped the seat, not in fear but in utter dissatisfaction. Sitting next to her was the boy who tormented her and delighted her since arriving in District Twelve. Tears gathered in her eyes.
They moved slowly up into the night sky. Everything appeared to be detached and her problem seemed so insignificant. She didn’t dare look at Peeta or speak to him. She looked out into the glowing night sky. She secretly wanted the ride to be over, but as they reached the top, the cab jerked violently. Peeta immediately wrapped his arms around her.
The ride lights flickered on and off. Katniss glanced at Peeta, now frightened. They both were - she could see it in his eyes. The silence was unbearable. Then they heard a man shout, “Sorry about that folks. The ride is stuck. We’ll have you down in a jiffy!”
They expelled a deep breath. Katniss was going to miss out on watching the fireworks the way she wanted to. Somewhere down on the darkened lawn sat her family.   
“You’re not like my mother.”
His quiet words caused her to look at him. Katniss shrugged, “I feel like people think I am.”
“You’re not. You’d never hurt your child, you’d protect your child with your life. Much like how you did with your mother and sister.  You saved them by writing that letter and protected them during the raids in London. My mother would’ve never done that. She’d let us die in a raid. It’s why when I came to my brother Rye for help. He volunteered to bring you the bread and the letter from your Aunt. My mom actually balked at sending you anything at all.” His hushed voice filled the cab.
Katniss guiltily glanced down and knew Peeta was not a bad person. She was simply a rotten girl carrying a childish grievance. “It was the pie.”
“What,” Peeta asked, “what pie?”
“You see in England, we didn’t have meat, or regular meals. It was hard on us. Everything is severely rationed. We were bombed on a regular basis, you could see the planes fighting in the air over London. My father was an RAF pilot. Served his country with great distinction and died during the night our street was struck.”
Katniss could see the bombs as they went off. She glanced at Peeta but didn’t see him. She heard the whistling of the bombs as they fell and the way the ground under her feet shook. “Up to that point we made do with what we had, and when my father died, my mother lost her touch with reality. Things became worse as we had no income to even purchase things with our rations. When your brother showed up at my doorstep, it was the first time we’d eaten in days. The bread saved my life and that of my family.”
“I didn’t know it got that bad, I mean we’ve watched the newsreels but it doesn’t paint the real picture does it.”  His arms held her tighter. Katniss put her head on his shoulders. And the oddest thing happened. She felt safe, much like when she sat on her father’s lap after dinner.
“I was so grateful that when I discovered that there was actual meat here. I wanted to thank your family for the bread by making my father’s favorite dish from back home, steak and kidney pie.”
“I remember that.”
Katniss looked into his eyes, finally having the courage to ask, “Why did you throw it out? I’d left my gloves at the bakery and went back for them, and I saw you. I saw when you angrily threw it out in the trash. Wasn’t it good enough?”
Peeta eyes widened. He shook his head, “My flat-head of a brother spilled rat poison on top of the pie. My father was furious with him.  I was so mad because I could see just how much it meant to you. I had to throw it out. I was afraid you would ask me about it, but you never did and I wondered why.”
Katniss couldn’t believe what she heard. “Rat poison?”
“Yea, we had a mouse problem and my mom didn’t want the customers to know so she bought rat poison and left it on the top shelf. My brother came rushing from the outside. He bumped into the shelf and the poison fell on top of your pie.”
“All this time,” Katniss was shocked. She had gotten it wrong.
“Now I know why you dislike me so much.” His eyes twinkled, “I’ve been a goner since the day you stepped into town. I’ve been trying to figure out what it was about me that you found detestable. But the more I tried the more you spurned my sophomoric advances.”
Katniss could feel her cheeks turning colors as the blood rushed into them. “I was wrong, I’m sorry. I’ve treated you so poorly.”
His hand gently touched her face “You see this is why you’re unlike my mother. She’d never apologize after a goof up.”
It dawned on her as she sat cozily within the cab of the Ferris wheel that he was too good for her.  “I don’t deserve someone like you.”
Peeta’s blue eyes collided with her grey ones. His eyes descended to her lips, “I like you, Katniss. I like you a lot and now that you know I’m going to court you. But first I’m going to be your friend, and afterwards I’m going to seduce you, slide a bun in the oven and force you to marry me.”
“Peeta Mellark, you’re cock-eyed!” Katniss exclaimed. She was secretly thrilled. The boy of her dreams was flirting with her. All of her life she’d watched him, even under the pretext of hate. But it wasn’t hate she felt for Peeta Mellark, it was love.
“Nah, just in love,” he grinned, placing a kiss on her forehead.
Peeta shifted her so that her hands were fat on his wide chest. She was distracted by his kisses. He placed one on the forehead, her chin, her nose, and her cheeks. “In love,” she managed to get out.  
“You love me, real or not real?”
“Huh,” Katniss asked as he placed a kiss on her upper lip. She was at this point a ball of mush.
“You’re not a girl who shows emotions to people you dislike. You act cool and detached. Now that I know why, it makes sense why around me you’re vibrant, like shimmering stars in the night sky.” He kissed her fore head then placed a kiss on her neck then whispered, “You have your guard down and you only do that when you’re around people you love.”
“Real,” Katniss confessed her true feelings for Peeta.
He chuckled, against her the skin of her neck, before trailing several kisses to her chin then inquired, “Now, what’s your favorite color?”
Katniss felt her heart race, knowing he was laying a trap and she was a willing victim. “Green.”
His voice was low and seductive. “Now, ask me mine?”
Katniss swallowed. Her lips felt parched and dry, much like her body felt barren without his. “What is your favorite color?”
Peeta cupped her face with one hand; the other was pressed on the small of her back, pushing her closer to him, “Orange.”
Katniss watched the way Peeta’s face neared hers. Her nostrils flared as she felt engulfed by his warmth, his strength, and his scent. She muttered, “Like my aunt’s hair?”
“No, softer like the sunset,” Peeta whispered.
Katniss let her lashes flutter close. She could feel his breath on her lips, “Oh.”
“Now that we’re friends, I can seduce you,” Peeta murmured onto her lips. The fireworks literally went off as Peeta kissed her. Katniss had heard of fireworks going off and felt faint. If it weren’t for the seat she was sitting in, her knees would have given out. Peeta was an excellent kisser and seducer.
The cab shook and the lights flickered again as they moved, they parted their mouths. Peeta exclaimed, “Wow!”
Katniss just wanted to continue kissing Peeta, and she was granted her wish.  All the way back down, Katniss and Peeta kissed. When they got to the ground Peeta gave the guy two more tickets and they rode the Ferris wheel again just to neck. None noticed the fireworks.
Once they were back on the ground, they drifted arm and arm toward the main lawn. They shared the cup of cider and ate the cheese buns. Speaking softly to each other about how best to handle her Uncle and Aunt, he paused several times to kiss her while the fireworks were finishing. Everything she’d ever wanted was in the arms of the boy she wanted to distrust at the beginning of the day.
“Katniss, you missed the fireworks,” Primrose retorted, spotting them. She ran up short when she noticed the familiar way Peeta held her.
“No, she didn’t we saw it them from the wheel, together,” Peeta winked.
“What happened?” Prim mouthed excitedly.
Katniss couldn’t stop her blush.
“Peeta,” her uncle Haymitch greeted.
“Mr. Abernathy,” Peeta greeted back.
“So, you have some news,” Haymitch said giving them both a pointed look.  Her uncle was terribly perceptive.
Peeta smiled mischievously, “Well, you see I’ve seduced and impregnated your niece in the Ferris wheel.”
“Peeta!” Katniss smacked him in the arm, unbelieving he would say such a thing.  She reassured, “Uncle Haymitch, none of that happened.”
“You know I did seduce you,” Peeta insisted and winked.
Katniss groaned, Prim giggled nervously, her aunt gasped, and her uncle on the other hand laughed and clapped Peeta on the back.
Aunt Effie fanned herself a sign she was alarmed. She turned to her husband and demanded, “What madness! Haymitch, what is this about?”
“Katniss needs to get hitched,” Prim blurted out unable to stop giggling.
In a serious tone of voice Peeta confessed, “It’s true, Mrs. Abernathy, I need to marry your niece as soon as possible. She’s got a Mellark bun in her oven.”
Katniss was mortified but she couldn’t help the way she smiled. He made her laugh and happy. She hadn’t felt this way since the day she learned of her father’s death.  
“You know I’ve never known Katniss to smile. If you’ve managed to put that ear splitting grin on my niece’s face then I welcome you into the family. Now about this marriage, we might have to get you two hitched soon.  Because if she isn’t in the familiar way now she’ll be soon,” Uncle Haymitch winked at Peeta then turned to Katniss. “What do you say, Katniss?”
Katniss could have said no, but the fact was she wanted him badly. “Yes.”
Effie gasped, “Is this serious, are you really going to marry our Katniss?”
“Yes,” Peeta smiled into her eyes, his hand cupped her face and then placed a chaste kiss on her lips.
“Well then, we have much planning to do. Come along Mr. Mellark. Katniss has not one stylish bone in her body, but you do.” Effie took Peeta by the hand and led him away.
“What happened?” Prim sided up to her.
Katniss happily smiled. It was sudden but she was truly happy and wanted to spend the rest of her days with him. She glanced ahead to see Peeta and her aunt speaking. She could see her future - children running through this meadow, Peeta holding her tightly and peace.
“Katniss,” Prim said, “where did you go?”
Katniss couldn’t hide her smile, “You were right, Prim. It was all a misunderstanding.’
Prim squealed “I’m going to be Peeta’s little sister.
It dawned on Katniss she was getting married….. 
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