hh

what do you guys call it when the only family member willing and able to support your disabled ass is a transphobic asshole who will poke you on subjects you tell them to drop and almost make you think it's as safe a time as any and when you sincerely ask for gender neutral language for the holidays/new year onward you end up on the losing end of a one sided screaming match that involves all the sacrifices made to raise you and keep you alive being used as guilt trip leverage and culminates in any attempts of yours to speak being cut off by yelling GO SMOKE. GO SMOKE. NO. SHUT UP AND SMOKE / demanding you go take the shut up happily shut up drugs she specifically buys for you so you will smile and shut up happily

which you really try to avoid taking unless you Need the instant flashstep button Away from the suicidal brink because it worsens your memory problems

but said family member has nothing else to do and so sure loves driving you to those metaphorical cliffs after promising you are definitely driving to the park and not driving to the cliffs and then telling you its your fault she is committed to being a transphobic asshole to you because you frown when she is a transphobic asshole to you and that is so mean of you when she loves you so much

what would you guys call that

that's a situation where thinking "please oh please wishing star in the sky up there someone who doesn't care that i am not a what one would consider a productive member of society get me the fuck out of here well and good enough i never have to contact any of my family ever again" is valid right