♡ HAPPY CHANGKYUN DAY ♡ happy happy birthday to monsta x’s forever maknae, who despite turning 27 years old and fully being an adult, is still undoubtedly regarded by his hyungs as not-quite-grown-up yet. wishing him a lovely day and an even lovelier year as he so very much deserves!!

quick cc note: hehe here we goooo! buckle in we’re in for a long ride etc. you’re all used to this by now! changkyun is so very dear to me in such a specific way where i can’t think about him for too long or i’m at risk of crying. you know? he occupies such a particular place within the group and in my heart.

i definitely don’t claim to know what’s going on behind the scenes or pretend to exactly understand anyone’s state of mind except my own... but doesn’t changkyun seem lighter these days? i think in general changkyun loves the stage and loves music, and you can always tell that. he’s always been happy when he’s out there under the stage lights all mic’d up. but this past promotional period he has seemed so relaxed and happy and comfortable like he has been GLOWING!! that impossibly charming silliness that sometimes shows itself has been spilling out of him!!! and it makes me so so happy because he deserves that! like doesn’t it do your heart good to see him thriving!!

i have such a soft spot for him for a myriad of reasons but one of them is that it’s because i know that so much of this job kind of goes. against his instincts?? alkf;alsk. changkyun is by nature, so reserved a lot of the time and a lot of an idol’s job requires you to have your on switch flipped at all times. he himself has talked about it, how it doesn’t seem like a job suited for him and yet... it IS his job and it DOES suit him. and in a lot of ways, i think how introverted he is helps at his job, in that he is able to expend his energy when needed and ride that high, and then knows how to regroup and recover within himself. he’s talked about the come down from the rush of being on stage and how it’s a peculiar and acute loneliness, and how actually, he doesn’t mind it. that it’s something that you need to feel.

changkyun is just so thoughtful and introspective. i think he’d be such a good conversation partner. from now on when people ask that icebreaker question that’s like. which three people dead or alive would you want to have dinner with... i’m naming changkyun as one of the answers. i really admire the way that he can sit with his emotions and acknowledge them, and at the same time, the way that he’s like. fake it til you make it!!! like. so true king. me too. sometimes you just have to keep telling yourself that you’re fine and you just keep saying it and keep saying it until it’s true.

he’s a bundle of contradictions. he gives off this cool and fierce image while being so, so sweet to the bone, the group’s resident romantic. he quietly watches his groups antics from the side except for when his goofy sense of humor bursts out of him. he cares fiercely, so fiercely about what his people think of him — and nothing at all for his naysayers’ words. he’s incredibly introverted but loves standing in front of the crowd under the spotlight. :):

i think all the time about how changkyun really maintains a strong sense of self in an industry where it can be really hard, really brutal to do so. here are the things that stand out to me, especially: he is considerate of others, and endlessly patient with those he cares about. (thinking of: him sleeping in his studio for kihyun’s solo debut to make sure he didn’t disturb the sparse amount of sleep kihyun was getting. the way he always indulges hyungwon when hyungwon asks him to check his eyes.) he was raised with an appreciation for music and art and it shows so clearly in his identity as an artist. and along with that, growing up in a few different countries when he was younger gave him maybe a more international mindset than he would have had otherwise. he is honest in his music. he knows his worth and will make the decision that’s best for him, even when those decisions may not come easily.

i’m so excited for the future for him. like changkyun, i also believe that good times and bad times must both exist, and that one will naturally follow the other. but i hope that for him the good times always last longer than the bad ones, and that inner light that’s been shining from him keeps on dazzling us all.

im changkyun!!! i admire who you choose to be every day!! i’m really proud of you and the way you’ve had your cake and eaten it too, leaving the company and staying committed to the group and the members you love so much. i can’t wait for your solo ventures to come, i can’t wait for the group activities to come, i just can’t wait to see what comes next. this year i hope you stay happy, stay smiling. i hope you keep on betting on yourself, because you will never, never lose when you do. with all the love and support, always. rooting for you, cheering for you. with you every step of the way.