Roswell New Mexico - Season 4, Episode 11

Okay...aside from OH MY GOD ALEX IS BACK AND HAD ACTUAL SCREEN TIME WITH MICHAEL AND IT WASN’T JUST THE LAST TWO MINUTES OF THE EPISODE HOORAY!

Three things first:

1. Did we really have to bring Alex back just to have him say “oh yeah by the way I’m totally dying from radiation poisoning”? Hahaha. What the fuck?! I mean, I’m gonna go ahead and assume that Vlamis and Tyler wouldn’t be happy with the Malex ending if Alex literally dies. So I’m going to assume that means he gets healed somehow. Perhaps everyone will finally get that handprint moment they’ve been begging for. But I’m just going to have to go with “he’s definitely not dying” or I’m going to lose my mind. 

2. If they fucking have Dallas marry them in that permanently twilight world with only Bonnie for a witness, I might also lose my mind. I’m sorry, I’m gonna need A) light and B) everyone else in attendance. 

3. Was there an actual explanation of what the Alighting is in Clyde’s ramblings? Because I don’t think there actually was beyond “I’m gonna go home” and like...is that it? Just going back to Oasis? Cause that’s boring. Anticlimactic. I mean, I expect nothing less from this show but still? Why have a fancy word for it if it’s just “point my star map home and walk through a portal”? That doesn’t sound like “THE ALIGHTING” to me. I mean honestly, I need someone to explain the show’s whole alien mythology to me because my god does it not make sense to me AT ALL. This show makes me feel so dumb sometimes and I’m pretty sure it’s just bad storytelling but also....maybe I’m missing something?? So I was rewatching bits of season one because I was having Malex feelings and I ended up watching Noah’s whole scene about “coming from a war torn planet blah blah blah the Alighting and when they come to take us home, I was going to trade you for leverage” and he talked about a stowaway??? So like...why did all these aliens come? They were trying to escape Oasis because of Jones the Dictator? But then Jones stowed away? But like...there were a bunch of his Ophiuchus disciples on that ship too? Noah, Bonnie, Clyde, Tesca etc? So wouldn’t that be more than one stowaway?? And then what were Nora, Louise and Theo actually trying to do? Were they trying to go home? Or were they just trying to save their kids and take Max from Jones so he couldn’t transfer into him? And Theo was undercover helping Jones but also creating pocket dimensions as decoys???? Like...what the fuck is any of this supposed to be?!?!? HELP! I have so many questions and I don’t feel like any of them have been answered. 

Aside from those three things....

I was very glad to see Alex in half the episode rather than just the last five minutes like I feared. Still annoyed at the “hey I’m dying part” but remember, we’re ignoring that cause he’s gonna be fine okay. But I like that we really are just full on paralleling Motherland and Raylla and Alex is immediately like “we found each other again let’s get married!” Which is very sweet. And you know...no hang ups there in saying yes...just the whole....dying part but anyway...moving on. 

PRESENT DAY, PRESENT TENSE I LOVE YOU!!! ABOUT DAMN TIME! Bless. 

They have incredibly cheesy lines but at least one of them isn’t “you’re my turquoise” because I swear if I have to hear Max say that one more time to Liz I’m going to lose it. Haha. 

I have to thank Bonnie at least for letting Malex have some alone time while she and Dallas went on their little fruitless errand. I may not really care about her arc but at least she gave us that. 

There were references in this episode but I don’t think there were any Harry Potter ones? Maybe I rage blocked it out immediately but I don’t think there were?!?

I continue to adore the Kybel awkwardness and also the fact that Rosa and Max totally know. I desperately wish they had just let Isobel date Anatsa all last season and started fresh with the Kybel slowburn this season so we could have had more time with this but alas. It is what it is. They’re super cute and I can’t wait till they make it official. 

I was very glad to see so many Kyle and Rosa scenes in this episode because despite Kyle finding out she was his sister in season one, I feel like their sibling scenes have been pretty nonexistent so yay for those. Especially him telling her how far she’s come and her being like “yeah so Isobel is totally in love with you too you idiot”. I really wish we had gotten so much more but this was great. 

I still just...don’t care about this Liz plot that, shocker...was solved in an episode. Well...at least the addiction part. There was that preview (that preview that had no Alex in it again ..ugh) where she said her brain is broken so I guess there’s consequences but still...obviously very rushed. 

I feel like Shivani wasn’t totally wrong about Echo because I don’t feel like they’ve really resolved any of their actual issues. But sure...I guess we’ll see. 

I suppose I should be happy that they’re all of a sudden now making an attempt to make Liz’s student relevant to the plot but uhhh...yeah...not so much. It all just feels kind of ridiculous to have that whole GED class plot and trying to be a mentor just so she could be used by Clyde like nine episodes later. 

I suppose I should also be glad that Clyde is trying to make Shivani and her cryo daughter relevant to the plot too but uhh...I’m sorry I still don’t care. Plus, I really can’t believe that Shiri Appleby was used just for that weird mindscape episode but I feel like they’ve just wasted her if she’s not going to suddenly be relevant at the end. But also...do I even care about her actual character beyond that she’s OG Liz? At this point? No. Although still the fact that she’s apparently related to the Valentis and we didn’t even see her when Kyle and Eduardo went to find her for...reasons? to get Alien console pieces? is just kind of also absurd. She was vaguely plot relevant and we didn’t even see her??? So strange. 

Speaking of Eduardo....why were we meant to care at all about him and his estranged daughter if it was literally a twelve second plot point that meant nothing?? Like literally...other than Kybel hooking up, that whole Mexico excursion was thoroughly pointless. 

Anyway....I would like Alex not to die now that we’ve got him back. I would like to actually get to see Sanders in that tux at their wedding outside the pocket dimension. That is coincidentally the only thing I still care about aside from Kybel and Rosa’s happiness. The plot is meaningless but I still would really like someone to explain it to me just cause I want to understand. To be honest, I’m not even sure the showrunners and writers could explain it if pressed.