#read through some old discord messages. im emotional. | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

chronically-undertronic · 3 months

Note

scuse my weirdass rambles, i swear i have just put this place under a microscope /j. so many observations to be made lmao

listen, i was just scrolling through the undertronic tags for nostalgia and some writing ideas (there was one (1) fic on ao3, yaboi wouldn't be takin that). i didnt actually know there was even anything on there, i had never checked before. and honestly, seeing everything that had been posted onto there was a trainwreck of emotion. it was like scrolling through messages of a group of friend's chat and reminiscing memories, except they're not mine and i was never there. it's such a vivid feeling of absolute belonging to a place i was never present in, yaknow?

and then i saw y'all and couldn't stop thinking about it for days. the carrd caught my eye first because a) bro that's just a straight up sickass carrd holy shit and b) undertronic content?? in the wild?? lets go babey!! and then i looked into it more and just. man, i dont know what emotion it was, probably like all of the above. 'cause holy shit, i didn't know there were more people like me out there!! i thought we were the only system who had undertronic headmates that existed for years!! it didn't even cross my mind that it was possible for more to be out there. so reading through old pluralkit discord screenshots and posted conversations was like looking at something i had always longed for.

you guys looked like you were happy in those chats.

you didnt have to hide in those moments. i wanted to reach out and reply and laugh alongside the ghosts of these four year old conversations and say "i get it, i understand this, we've lived it too," because i've never talked with someone who had a chance of returning the sentiment to its full extent. man, it was like lookin in a mirror of what i wanted to see. and i know i'm crazy 'cause again, i wasn't there. you could argue i'm still not 'here', hiding behind signatures and pseudonym accounts.

i got what i came for, though. i have my never-ending nostalgia and a pile of fics to write. i just think that the inspiration doesn't come from the ideas i saw being laid out, but the people who did so and the inherent beauty of learning it the way i did.

anyway. again, pardon my over-analytical rambles. wanna go grab a cup of tea and bitch about life some time?

-💜💚

I feel the groupchat / belonging thing bcs that's how I feel when I look at old homestuck content (I didn't get into it until 2016, when it yk, ended)

Also oh my god *points* listen

Listen

We genuinely have like the whole cast of UT in our head because it's one of our spinterests (the other being aphmau ofc) so the fact that you also have UT headmates is so???? /pos I feel seen I feel less alone we get each other we shake hands

Ik it would take away the safeness of being anon but now I'm thinking of how fun it'd be to make a UT themed syscord server hrmm

Anyways I'm in tears anon /pos I would love to grab tea and bitch (as long as it's iced tea sorry im southern I don't drink it hot /j)

0 notes

jackstingy · 8 months

Text

# JACKSTINGY – an independent, mutuals only, 18+ roleplay blog following the semipiternal woes of a) some nerdy english kid waffling between uni and an internship at the local retirement home and b) the maleficent spirit of a machiavellian drunkard now attempting to permanently possess the body of said nerdy english kid. triggering content such as religious theming + imagery, references to alcohol use + physical violence, and dissociation will make frequent appearances. rules below the read more, though saint peter and satan have one little thing in common and that’s knowing quite thoroughly that the spirit of old stingy jack isn’t reading through shite.

(you probably should, though. shutting up isn’t quite a part of either of their personal dictionaries, and neither is using parentheses in the manner they were meant to be used.)

THE PLAYER'S HANDBOOK – THE RECORDS IN THE BASEMENT – THE CEALLACH SCRAPBOOK – THE CAT RANDOMIZER

INTERACTING. will not be open to bigots, white-washers, or fetishisers. it will, however, be open to any and all mutuals (which is a status reserved for anyone and everyone who is a cool, respectful, talented writer – id est, you!), regardless of plotting status and whether or not we’ve talked ooc. feel free treat memes as starters, reblog memes and prompts from me instead of the source without sending anything in, delete anything from me that you’re too busy to answer; i’m really just here to have fun and find new people to write with, so as long as you respect my rules and i respect yours, we’re cool.

WRITING. will be tagged with applicable triggers as “trigger tw”, posted using beta editor, and mainly occur in two modes: anxious third person rambling from j.d. and atrocious first person misanthropy from jack with an italicised and bolded transition between them. while my writing may look lengthy, you are in no way obligated to match word count or force replies out quicker than you can handle. basic etiquette applies: no godmodding, no metagaming, and no powerplaying without discussing the parameters of any of these acts beforehand. all this being said, roleplaying is a hobby, and if you ever want to drop a thread or get something a little shorter in your notifications, i am more than willing to oblige you.

SHIPPING. in terms of romance will happen selectively and exclusively with j.d for the foreseeable future, be based on chemistry after a substantial amount of threads and plotting, and in no way be forced on you. i love pre-established relationships of the platonic or hostile kind with reckless disregard for my characters’ established timelines, though, so i’m always open to editing plot points in and out as development happens and stories are made. i’d rather not write smut on this blog, but suggestive content will be tagged as such and fade to blacks may happen.

UNFOLLOWING. will be done with a heads-up through private messages and a softblock on my end unless you’ve stated prior that you’d rather be hard blocked. of course, i don't expect a heads-up from anyone who wishes to unfollow or block me; do what you need to do to keep your corner of the internet comfortable!

FORMATTING. will be minimal, with small text, single spacing, italicised words, and 100x100 static icons. if there is anything you’d like me to change about how i format my posts, please let me know via tumblr ims or discord.

OOC. talk will be attempted! i’m seb, 23, he/him, now kicking it in gmt+11, with ‘it’ being the metaphorical bucket that is writing. i love commenting on posts (i know most of tumblr hates it, but i truly do believe that the reply function was made for me and me alone), sending in asks, and falling to my digital knees at the sheer quality of writing and emotion to be found in this community. i am slightly terrified of returning to indie roleplaying after a long stint in just group rp sectors, but hopefully j.d. and jack can bring some existential fear and festive cheer to you all!

#— will o' the wisp; pinned

1 note · View note

sinkorswimvn · 2 years

Text

300 Follower Sail-ebration🎉

We can't thank you guys enough for all the love you've given this project. We've been so overwhelmed by how well it's being recieved, and it's not even out yet! Every bit of support acts a motivator, and we're more excited than ever to produce this story and share the journey with you!

Our social team have a lot of fun revealing secrets and answering your questions, and this time we're here to deliver something different. Here's some behind-the-scenes content from SOS's most chaotic team. After all, what are we good for, if we can't turn our characters into memes?

Sorry, Raph

Bonus:

[Image description:

4 screenshots of a discord messaging chain.

The first message from #1 [Redacted] Stan?? reads, “Everyone: Who’s [Redacted]??”

The second, from poll bitch - not so [Redacted] :(, “Legit. “Ummmm… we don’t care but ok” “Where’s Ralph” RALPH”

🌱: “sos sensation ralph” The message has three laughing emotes attached.

poll bitch - not so [Redacted]: “Like where’s Wally but it’s ‘Rediscovering Ralph… Why Everyone Misnames Raphael Blanco’”

ashleigh: “Ahh yes, my favourite character, looks at smudged writing on hand Rasputin Blanchard”

poll bitch - not so [Redacted] responds with three laughing emotes in a row

#1 [Redacted] Stan??: “RASPUTIN”

🌱 sends an edited image.

It has a green-blue ombré background with palm tree tops on the bottom and pink lens flares on the left side. ‘Ralph’ in all lower case and a plain font rests to the left and up from the direct center to cover up other text. A yellow circle is below it, with a character to the right of both. He has dark eyebrows and medium brown eyes sit above a wide nose and thick parted lips. He has a soft, square jawline and cheekbones, with wide shoulders and a thin torso and limbs. He has light brown skin with a green highlight along the right side of his body, and stands with his feet apart, right leg bent, and his right hand behind his neck. He’s wearing black swim shorts with a yellow stripe through the middle, and a black, short sleeved button up that reveals part of his stomach. He wears an edited on hat that says, “Women want me, Fish fear me, with an outline of a fish on it. The circle to his left reads “Raphael Blanco. Age: 28 years old. Pronouns: He/Him. Height: 5’7”. Sexuality: Asexual; Heteromantically inclined. About: Nurse from Sutton, UK.” A watermark in the bottom left reads “@sinkorswimvn”

ashleigh: “NOOOOOO ”

poll bitch - not so [Redacted]: “KC PLEASE” with a laughing and crying emote. “THE Hat! Women want me Fish fear me”

Bonus:

🌱: “not to worry” with an image attached. It is a further edit of the first, with a cigarette sticking out of his mouth and trails of smoke floating towards the right side of the image. He wears a poorly edited t-shirt that says “Of course I [redacted] fast, I got fish to catch” and has a large green, open mouthed fish on it. Short girls’ jean shorts cover his swim trunks. The text information to his right has been further edited. It now reads, “ralph. Age: 28 years old. Pronouns: He/Him. Height: 5’7”. Sexuality: Asexual; Heteromantically inclined. About: trucky boy from Sutton, UK.”

#1 [Redacted] Stan??: “😭”

ashleigh: “TRUCKY BOY”

poll bitch - not so [Redacted]: “NOOOOOOO IM CRINE about the trucky boy” End ID].

#sail-ebration #sos raphael #sink or swim #sosvn #sink or swim vn #sinkorswimvn #mod ashleigh #mod kc

14 notes · View notes

bookuya · 3 years

Text

alright lately i feel like things have been pretty crappy for a lot of people recently including me. i just wanted to let everyone know that they are loved (by me as well! ily), so here is my message to you if you need it:

i know these times for you are rough right now but i know that you can definitely get through this. who knows? tomorrow might be a better day but if not, that's fine too. take your time, it's okay to be sad or mad or upset or just disappointed. you do the best you can everyday and that's already enough, i am extremely proud of you ❤️.

if you're seeing this you've probably been in my notes/notifs before but if not, that's okay. do you know how happy you made me before? ever since i've downloaded tumblr my journey on here has been so amazing and seeing everyone's responses to my work makes me so excited to write even more. likes, reblogs, comments, even just sending me a positive ask makes me want to get up and hug you through the screen. even if you're just reading and not interacting, thank you. thank you for existing to this day and i hope that you continue to exist and live your life to the absolute fullest.

i love you so much. i may not know you but i just know you're amazing. you may feel alone right now and that's alright, you deserve a relaxing break to yourself. i hope whoever is on the other end waits for you cause if they do, they are wonderful for waiting for such a beautiful person like you.

it's okay to speak up. it's okay to let go of old friends who turned out to be not so friendly, or friends you just don't vibe with anymore. it's okay to be mad, you are always allowed to be. don't let anyone tell you that you can't feel emotions.

i may think tumblr is fun and nice and all but i don't make friends just for fun. if you are going on a rollercoaster of ups and downs then hell yeah, im going on it with you too! send me an ask, a dm, talk to me on discord, anywhere anytime. i might be asleep sometimes but ill try my best to answer right away. im listening with all ears and ill most definitely try my best to comfort you when you need it. you aren't alone darling, i hope in some way i can help you if you ever feel like you can't yourself. even so, you are just so brave overall and you went through so much. it's okay to let it out.

sending you all my love and hugs and kisses and headpats and smiles,

boo :)

#all of this i mean it genuinely #you can vent or ramble to me if you ever need it #i really hope as time goes by the days get better for you my love.❤️

22 notes · View notes

swampgallows · 5 years

Text

i got distracted earlier and forgot to post but im thankful for my mutuals who have helped me time and again, even if it’s in ways you may not know. i appreciate you all so much and i am so grateful for the friends i’ve made here and the small but intimate community cultivated through tumblr.

zbfc and wch, thank you for everything. @zeyan i love you with all my heart and i’m so fucking thankful i could have funny airbnb time with you and @aeiroki grimlock hunterpunter. you make me laugh every single day and i always want the best for you both (and jack!!! and PARKER!!!)

@lokaror thank you for letting me share my love of rexxar and bears with you. we’ve shared a lot of fantastic laughs together, some very fun stuff and some very deep shit too. i treasure every one of our convos together, and your playlists too!

@reglei thankful i finally got to beat you into submission at blizzcon. youre a sweetheart and a sleepyhead. thanks for listening to me ramble late into the night. i appreciate all the times youve had my back, whether it was creepy dudes or spoilers or w/e. you shoulda killed me w gorehowl when you had the chance

I LOVE @amarysue i miss you when you work long hours but i’m always so happy when we get to play games together. i hope you can leave the mcdonalds playplace soon. also i dont get to say it much but i love talking about academic stuff with you. i know i rib you about dark leafy greens but you are very educated in a lot of amazing fields and i love when you share your knowledge with me!!! i love amary!!!!

@theabsolutevoid i know youre the void but youre a golden human being of radiant light. you are so spectacular, we are all always in amazement of your passion and creativity and constant flow of ideas, and your compassion seems boundless. i am so grateful to know such a special person and spent many late nights laughing to tears with you

@perce the dynamic duo... im thankful daygo got me into ladybug so i could hear all of your amazing takes on it as they are equally as hilarious as your wow takes. i admire your resilience, though that might be weird to say, and though i know i’m an old crone youre definitely a role model for me taking command of my own life and establishing boundaries to become the person i want to be. i’m so grateful we got to spend blizzcon together again!! and thank you for getting me the long-forgotten hippogryph. its a very important memory to me.

refugees i know i dont pop in much but i still love you all dearly. im embarrassed actually because you are all functional adults and i’m not but when i get a job and reenter society i want to be able to come back and say i’m a big kid now

thrainosh squad @irenthel @wckhamm etc thank you for letting me indulge my interests without ridicule or judgment. @fitzefitcher i dunno you changed my life SORRY there is not a less fucked up way to say that. no pressure

@sithisis & crew thank you for so many incredible hots games and wonderful memories and all of your sweetness and fun times!!! sith you have inspired and supported so much of my writing and my ideas and i am in awe that you are getting so many amazing opportunities working in games journalism!!! i know theres a lot of grunt work but at the end of the day it seems like youre really doing something you genuinely love (and are good at!!) and i’m so happy for you. you work hard and you deserve it. im love skitty w a gun

@steblynkaagain your art is such an inspiration to me, and i’m amazed by your cosplay too! i’m thankful that even across language barriers we can enjoy thraina and silly modern AUs together. i am so impressed by your intelligence and achievements. your comic where you pledge yourself to Thrall’s Horde is still so important to me, and every day i think about your mechanic garrosh..... and doctor drek’thar, and doctor thrall, and SHAMAN GARROSH....... (sob)

@captainkaprozyx and @sdei ... i am so thankful for all of your artwork and your amazing gifts. i am working on getting them framed, and your zine was amazing! you are a great team and I love your collaborations. also sdei’s birthday gift is still my discord icon. we just really love a big guy huh....... cannot express how inspiring your artwork is. the detail, the colors... it brings me to tears, i am so stunned. you are both so incredibly talented!

@omnifariousness bro i dont even know where to start. many good dog times and we can strike up the late night jawin again soon i hope. shit has been scattered and i know youve been dippin back n forth on the road but i hope the shit evens out soon for you. excited for you to see tool in feb and damn dude every DAY i think about the reading you treated me to of the 40k stuff for your reel. god man i want that VA shit to work out for you bad. your diction is impeccable and you so deserve it

@darnjam i know you guys dont read this but i love you so much and every day i’m so thankful we’re all still friends. @daygloow thank you for being like the sole source and catalyst for my personal development for like the last 3 years, im so proud of you and everything youve worked so hard to achieve and i’m so glad youre getting the recognition you deserve. thank you for always picking me up (vehicular and emotional) and for watching cartoons n playin vidya with me. god whens the next GOOD rave? i need to make you proud and actually dj so i can play banana

@bluntcrusher every day i’m like god when will king tori take the throne... im so thankful that youre in a good spot finally and that youre getting the love you deserve. and plus a sweet pucci mane. my blogs a mess but im glad youre still stickin around for it haha. always happy to see youre safe and THRIVING

@swarnpert love you dude thank you for lettin me harass you w 420 snaps. bro when you sent me those sabaton snaps i was in line for the haunted mansion at disneyland during blizzcon and it was just like... my heart was so full, it meant so much to me ALSO HOLY SHIT i love your art please NEVER STOP drawing

@nelfs i love your blog and your art and your FEELINGS like I dunno how to word it in a not-weird way. i think you are a very bright person with a good heart, and i’m thankful to know someone like that, even tangentially. it is fortifying also to see someone stand up for the things they love, whether it’s just a cartoon show or something of serious concern like animal welfare. i admire your healthy relationship to yourself and your strong integrity.

@neophyte-redglare i think about bead world garrosh every fucking day of my life. cannot thank you enough. i treasure it

@redpandalori THIS IS THE MVP RIGHT HERE. i dunno when you started sending me floods of kittums but every day i look forward to it and every single one means so much to me. i wear the kandi you handcrafted for me every single day and i show it off constantly to my friends because it’s just mindblowing. you are so sweet and thoughtful and i love sendin you snaps and it’s just incredible how the internet is. thank you for sending me rain snaps and kito & harley/ears & lilith pics all the time

@hungwy i dunno WHAT you get outta my blog but i’m thankful for the reams of sweet animal pics and interesting linguistic and anthropology posts on your blog. you’re a very positive force on my dash and you seem a wonderful person irl too!

@ubersaur im so happy we’re still mutuals after all this time lmao. you were one of the first aces id ever known so we’ll always have that solidarity and i’ll always be thankful. and i have to seriously catch up on magus bride haha. thank you for all of your love and support after all this time, i hope i offer the same to you!!

@18milliondeadplebs the rare and beautiful nexus of my two sole interests... warcraft and raving. dude just thank you for existing man LMAO i hope we can go ravin together some day

@kontextmaschine what a strange long fuckin trip it’s been dude. super surreal to have raved with you and had you come all the way down for burst but i knew i’d be remiss if youd missed it. you definitely deserved a potent taste of the 90s. thank you for the usb sticks, im still waiting on a worthy recipient for the other two. the majority of your blog is practically in hieroglyphics to me but man when the posts hit... they fuckin hit. i know you dont need me to tell you, but youve got a great talent and weirdass fuckin eye. a very very particular eye. love you man. please kiss badger for me.

@ironbull thank you for suffering in wisdom tooth hell with me. i am glad you had a good time at disney world and im hoping we can both be free of all of our tooth woes soon. thank you also for your advice and support in my personal stuff too!!

@kittensceilidh thank you for your sweet messages! every one of your hugs means a lot to me!!! it is nice to feel seen when i am in dark places.

@dimedog warcraft and foggy forests... hell yeah dude

@tim-official man sometimes it really is as simple as just laughing at the same funny shit, but youve reached out to me too and i appreciate it!!!

@peanotbotter thank you for all of the laughs and the kind words! thank you for caring about me, i care about you too!! i hope we can play hots again or wow together soon!!!

wow this got long but i love a bunch of people. there are more of you that i love and are very special to me and i apologize if i didnt get to you. i hope you all had a nice holiday, if you celebrated. thank you for believing in me

#blathering

54 notes · View notes

ivyfair · 4 years

Text

Ivy Fairchild (Aisha Dee), 26, Female, Bisexual ━

( hi hi, I’m tasha! and this is my daughter ivy fairchild! it’s been a couple months since I rp’d her skdkdoa This is tech an alt. version of her since the og version does not necessarily fit with the rp. you can IM me here, on tumblr, or message me on my discord dumbass#9361 )

bare with me, this is gonna be a long mess akdkdka, I’m sorry

ivy fairchild was raised by her grandparents

her mother died when she was 2 years olds from a car accident and her father was deployed into the army

her mother, sophia, had a one night stand with a married man. she didn’t know at first until she saw his ring on his finger the next morning.

sophia was disgusted and left, wanting to forget that night but ended up finding out weeks later that she’s pregnant

she didn’t know what to do, she was was only 23 and she didn’t want to tell the guy she was pregnant. she didn’t want to ruin a marriage and she didn’t want to raise a child alone. so she went to her best friend and begged him to help her.

her best friend, luke, was heart eyes over her so he agreed to help her with the baby and telling everyone he was the father

so she did and here came along ivy woooo ( I’m a messsss )

after Ivy’s mother passed she moved in with her grandparents who then moved back to Australia to be with family. They came back to Frostford when Ivy was 8 years old

luke was deployed into the army. she only got to see him during the times he was allowed to have vacations visit

ivy grew up helping her grandfather with the family’s farm ( since she an only child and it was getting hard for him to do it alone )

ivy loved anything that had to do with flowers, painting/drawing, and animals

ivy would constantly asked stories about her mother whenever her grandfather wasn’t busy

when she was 12 luke came back home, he was on two years of inactive, which she didn’t fully understand what that meant but all she knew was that he was home, for what she thought, permanently.

there was a lot adjusting to do for everyone

it wasn’t until a year after luke has been home that when she found out the truth about her biological father

everyone was mourning the loss of ivy’s grandfather. it was a hard time for ivy, but she was trying to be strong for her grandmother

she helped packed her grandfather’s stuff away with luke a couple month after he passed.

her grandfather seemed to have a few boxes of things that belonged to sophia that ivy didn’t know he had

ivy found her mothers journal, keeping it hidden so she could take it with her to her room when she was done helping luke. she read every single page. including the one where she talks about how luke wasn’t her biological father ( dun dun dunnnnnn ) ( aejkgr;i ignore me )

ivy was angry and confronted luke, because a part of her was really hoping what her mother wrote was a lie

but alas it wasn’t and young ivy did not respond well to any of this. her emotions were everywhere. she basically gave him the silent treatment for a long time.

ivy’s grandma tried to talk some sense into her, but she was too stubborn to listen. it wasn’t until she heard that luke was going to be redeployed due to some conflicts that she regrets not talking to him.

that was the only day ivy ever skipped school. she went to luke’s apartment instead to apologize before he left town, very emo moment

Ivy left town in August after senior year for college Auburn University

Ivy and her best friend Lucinda decided to start their own business of using honey to make candy. She majored in business and minored in social work in Auburn University

Two years after graduating Ivy noticed that her grandmother’s health was starting to become questionable. She was living on her own but she decided to move back in with her grandmother until they figure things out

They found out that her grandmother was diagnosed with Alzheimer

Ivy has completely taken over the family’s small farm while helping around the house and taking care of her grandmother

Luci moved in to help out with the farm so that Ivy can have more time looking after her grandmother

Ivy refused to let her grandmother go into a nursing home, even when she started getting worse. She believed she can take care of her. But after having a long talk with Luci, she finally decided to place her in a nursing home ( she still thinks about this decision and a bit of a mess b/c of it )

luke, now working with Frostford’s fire department, does what he can to help ivy take care of things when he’s not on duty.

She’s someone who tells everyone she’s fine when she is clearly struggling. She’s a mess but she tries to come off as if she’s not

She a mix of the outgoing-fun friend and the grandma friend

She has a southern and Australian accent

She is a sweet girl, very caring and silly. She can come off as shy in a way. She’s an active person and up for an adventure ( sometimes argsfd ) but doing thing in from of people makes her want to kermit ( she’s working on that )

Wanted Connection:

BEST FRIENDS [1/2] -NAME UTP & LUCINDA MAE BENNET — these three have been friends since they were kids. they weren't exactly the kind of people you would expect to be as close as they were. all three different as can be, but somehow together they worked. luci was reckless and always looking for an adventure, ivy was quiet but thoughtful and rather nurturing of the others, and [open] was the glue the held them together. they kept luci in check and made sure ivy never felt left out. no matter where life takes them, they know without a doubt that they have each other and always will.

HIGH SCHOOL SOMETHING? - This muse was someone that everyone thought had a crush on Ivy or had something going on with ivy. More so the latter when they both came to school with poison ivy. Ivy didn’t know there was a secret spot for kissing ( and where the poison ivy was ) in the riverbank. Why your muse had poison ivy is up to you. There was probably something between them but after those rumors started Ivy distanced herself. Especially when the rumors turned from something innocent to slut-shaming.

FIRST SERIOUS RELATIONSHIP - this muse met ivy when they were going to Auburn University. These were two pairs that no one would’ve thought would be together. The fact that they worked was a surprise to most, considering the fact they were the opposite of each other. However, they were the same for things that mattered. After graduating they moved in together. Things started to become complicated, with her trying to start her business with luci and with whatever your muse wanted to do with their career. They did find a way to work through it, but then her grandmother’s health started to change. Her focus was completely on her grandmother, which left your muse to feel neglected. Their relationship ended when ivy came back home and caught them cheating. Your muse could’ve stayed in the apartment or moved somewhere else but Ivy moved back into her grandma’s house

ONE NIGHT STAND - someone she could hook up with

FWB/FLING - with everything that is going on, Ivy does not really want anything serious. But she would love to have a distraction. Would that opinion change? who knows. However, the other person can also just see it as a fling and nothing serious. If they were to gain feelings is up to you.

CHILDHOOD FRIENDS/ACQUAINTANCES - Ivy grew up in frostford, for the most part. and since this is a small town, she would most likely know who a lot of people are. She was not popular like Luci was in high school. She never really felt like she fit in this town, so she tends to keep to herself. She’s outgoing and she will get along with mostly everyone, but she never lets them in the way she lets Luci in. That can start to change.

NEIGHBORS - if anyone wanna live next to farm! kefsgasgdfs this person probably sees the embarrassing parts of ivy since she forgets other people can see her when she's working on the farm. she most likely dies inside from embarrassment every time she sees them.

ENEMIES - ig anyone that does not like ivy sadfja;gasdg or whoever ivy does not like

ART STUFF - ivy loves drawing/painting! most of her paintings/drawings vary but she does focus on drawing/painting people of color since there is such a lack of it. especially with growing in a not-so-diverse town, this was her way of drawing others that looked like her. and posting it online for others to see themselves as well. But she does/can help anyone who would like to learn to draw or paint. Also, if someone wanted their wall decorated a certain way or wanted some type of logo she wouldn’t mind helping out.

#intro #// tis is long #// and the fact that i actually wrote some wanted connections #// im proud of me

12 notes · View notes

thenightling · 4 years

Text

The Bullshit I had to deal with on Tumblr Tonight

Okay, buckle up. This is a long ride, folks.

Some months ago someone posted about having a Discord about The Dreaming (Sandman Universe comic). I reblogged it as a fellow Sandman fan. I noticed in the rules there was an anti-Incest rule. I joked “Whoops, I mentioned Daniel and Ivy. Guess I broke that rule.” Daniel and Ivy are canonically a couple in The Dreaming. Unfortunately they are also technically related as Ivy is the great-grand-daughter of Desire (Daniel’s brother).

Well, the person who created the post blocked me and started to tell people I was pro-incest. Figuring this was a big misunderstanding I tried to reach out to their friends to set the record straight. I don’t even LIKE Ivy!

Then they decided to keep me on block (supposedly) because they felt I was “reblogging everything they post” and “stalking” them. Honestly, I just follow the “Sandman” tag and hadn’t noticed who I was reblogging from.

I let it be for a long time. Then tonight I saw a funny post on sandman-headcanons page that jokingly called Morpheus “Grandpa.” I realized quickly that I couldn’t reblog it. This had happened to me a lot in recent months because the posts in question had passed through the person who had blocked me or originated from them.

I publicly posted about this frustration tonight. That was my mistake. Next thing I know I find out that person was now telling people I ship a “Three-year-old” with an “old man” and they were saying this, out-of-context, to people unfamiliar with Sandman who took the statement at face value. Needless to say, I was horrified.

Here’s the thing Daniel and Morpheus are technically both “aspects” of Dream of The Endless. That means they are two facets or shards of a greater being who is essentially a great big, divine crystal or jewel. They are fragment pieces from the same soul. And I was always speaking of adult Daniel. Daniel hasn’t been depicted as a toddler since the mid-90s.

And here’s what followed after that...

https://thenightling.tumblr.com/post/189892817243/thenightling-thenightling-thenightling

I was given the ultimatum to delete any posts where I “ship” Morpheus and Daniel and they would consider unblocking me. As one of those posts had been liked by Neil Gaiman, himself, (author of The Sandman) I did not want to do that. And I was told “Oh, they already have Neilman on block too.”

(Neilman is a derogatory term used by those who think Neil Gaiman is a homophobe who “doesn’t deserve the ‘gai’ in his name.”)

So I was to choose them or the author of Sandman, Neil Gaiman. Hmm?

I got flustered and tried to explain further (suspecting this person I was talking to in direct mesage was the original person on an alt, based on how they wrote) telling me what my ultimatum was.

And in the process of defending myself and Neil Gaiman I accidentally typed “She” when the person’s pronoun of choice is Xe. I tried to correct myself but it was too late, that became a new subject of their anger toward me. They were convinced I had typed “She” on purpose. I had been using They / them as the pronoun up until that moment and I would never, ever misgender on purpose, even when angry. They refused to accept it was a typo.

Still, I was very upset at the misconception that I “ship a three-year-old with an old man.” That bothers me to no end.

Realizing there was another “misunderstanding” (and this time an exceptionally gross one) I made a post explaining who and what Daniel Hall actually is in great detail. I also provided evidence directly from the comics to confirm what I said in that he is no three-year-old. Not physically, nor mentally.

https://thenightling.tumblr.com/post/189895590768/what-the-hell-is-daniel-hall

They clearly didn’t read this post because they were still referring to Daniel as Morpheus’ “Son” and “heir.” Claiming that Morpheus “groomed” Daniel. And they referred to Morpheus as Daniel’s “predecessor” (which is something literally corrected as being wrong IN the very story that this person said is their “special interest” that they’ve read multiple times...)

Then the “ask” messages started rolling in...

https://thenightling.tumblr.com/post/189895724368/why-are-you-so-damn-obsessed-with-an-18-year-old

https://thenightling.tumblr.com/post/189895819008/just-because-someone-is-bisexual-and-supports

This above one you HAVE to read the notes to get the whole thing. Yet again they accuse me of being obsessed with them, without giving me a chance to even answer. No, I was never obsessed with them (this person). I was just bothered tonight when I couldn’t reblog a post I thought was funny.

I had lost interest in them possibly unblocking me when I found out they had Neil Gaiman blocked too. I realized I was in good company on that blocked list. But I will not stomach being accused of shipping a three-year-old. Especially when that character in canon wouldn’t even be three-years-old right now if he was human. If he was human he’d be thirty-years-old right now. He does not look, nor act three-years-old.

(Does that look like a three-year-old to you!?)

https://thenightling.tumblr.com/post/189895950763/yeah-well-you-are-a-dense-motherfucker-answer-my

https://thenightling.tumblr.com/post/189896055598/im-so-fucking-sick-of-you-youre-so-sure-that-youre

Ironic that they accuse me of bullying while lying about me. Or they were “misunderstanding the lore” (again...) and shaming me for posts the author had liked and trying to force me to delete and renounce those posts...

Here is the post Neil Gaiman had liked on the subject that they were trying to demand I delete.

https://thenightling.tumblr.com/post/171750432893/why-ive-started-the-crackship-of-morpheus-and

You may also notice the post is two-years-old. But this became this person’s new excuse for how they were treating me.

So yeah. @sorry-for-the-chocolate @zal001 @missghostlymoonshadow @endlessemptynight @deathlyendless @watertribe-enya @bazpik @hasturlavista @jr4cats @vagaryhexxx @sunagirl @iknowwheremytowelis

This is what happened to me tonight. If you’re wondering why I’m being so antisocial tonight.

Edit: I just realized the most obvious and laughable part in all of this. “Neil Gaiman is a homophobe!” Followed by “Take down that gay ship post that he liked!” ...And they, as well as their friends, don’t notice anything odd about that?! That’s rhetorical.

Not to mention I never physically shipped Morpheus and Daniel in any erotic way. I’m not some horny teenager. To me it was always about emotional / intellectual connection as equals. Also in the lore I use, it’s required that Daniel had re-created Morpheus posthumously as a dream entity (See Hob’s dream in Sandman: The Wake), which means technically, in that form Daniel would be the older of the two though both possess over eight billion years of knowledge and memory in their adult minds and bodies.

#The Sandman Fandom #Fandumb #Fan dumb #The Sandman Universe fan dumb #The Dreaming fan dumb #Daniel Hall fandumb #Dream of The Endless fan dumb

22 notes · View notes

imperialsea-a · 5 years

Text

ELIZABETH’S IN-DEPTH RP PLOTTING CHEAT-SHEET.

Want new-and-exciting plots for your character? Long to reach out to more of your followers, but don’t know where to start? Fear not! Fill out this form and give your RP partners both present and future all the of juicy jumping off points they need to help you get your characters acquainted.

Be sure to tag the players whose characters YOU want more cues to interact with, and repost, don’t reblog! Feel free to add or remove sections as you see fit. Template here.

Mun name: Rem (not that blue-haired anime girl or DN, it’s from my old blog!) OOC Contact: Contact me through the Tumblr IM system or my Discord! My Discord is: imperialsea#1818. Please tell me your URL if you message me there so I know who you are!

Now, onto the heart of the post!

♛ Who the heck is my muse, anyway? Elizabeth Eva Alexandria Cross, the only biological daughter of Kaien Cross, her father (a canon vk char), and Eva Liliya Cherie Cross, her mother (an oc muse)! Elizabeth is a vampire hunter by blood like all in her family before her! But, shh! Your character isn't supposed to know that . . . unless they're also a hunter . . . or a perhaps a vampire (since her family from both sides are famous hunters, but even then they don't have to know she's a vamp killer if you don't want them to) . . . or they're some sort of ally to her / the hunters association since she can't just tell anyone her actual work on a whim. Where she's from, the existence of vampires are a secret from most of humanity and it's her job to kill the dangerous people-hurty ones and keep that nice and secret so as to avoid a world war! 'Nothing about her is complicated at all', I say, lying through my teeth like Bethy does to society every day by keeping her job and true lifestyle hidden :'D

Further information below the cut, please take time to read if you’re stuck on what to plot and how Bethy operates!

♛ Points of Interest: - She was born and raised to fight against unruly beasts and composed foes alike. Despite her youth, she's a one-woman powerhouse and is not afraid to take herself down with an opponent if she deems it necessary. She's like the Smash player who hits the fake smash ball to take out an enemy on their last legs, even at the expense of her own life. She'll do it! Except in Smash she'd probably just win the match because she had an extra life and not, you know, not die forever for real in a last grand battle.

- She's got vamp genes all over the place and is rare among hunters. She's biologically immortal like a Pureblood despite not being a vampire herself and is living testimony of what her predecessors took from Purebloods both by honorable bestowal of blood from the mysterious Hooded Woman, and straight up [insert painting of Jupiter Devouring His Son here]. Her great grandparent is 3k+ years old, her father is 200+ for devouring his own twin-- it's messy as mythology, but anime :'D She herself is only 18 on default though (19 in K Crossover--), the youngest of her entire bloodline, and she can still be slain in battle even if she is much hardier than a typical human being. She's also sensitive to auras, and capable of sensing vampires.

- Things characters might notice? She's ghostly pale and kind of looks like she stepped out of The Last Unicorn. She looks cold, sophisticated, and vaguely otherworldly-- she really doesn't radiate the friendliest of vibes unless she's doing something she loves, and the calculated yet seemingly effortless grace of her movements are prominent in and outside of combat. She is descended from an ancient royal line, and those posh, stuffy mannerisms and formal speech pattern live on through her even if the Adrasteian monarchy no longer exists.

- She truly isn't a trigger-happy person, whatever the title of 'hunter' implies, and keeps a level head in most situations. Sure, Bethy looks as if she could bite someone's head off and can display some seriously threatening flashes of anger, but she's not going to do something rash and will only resort to drawing her weapons in a serious matter. She's here to save lives, maintain peace, and keep order, not disrupt it and set off a war! No pressure on her, right?

- She is also notably, NOT a high school student, though she may be mistaken for a high school senior or young college student since her age fits the bill. Elizabeth actually graduated from her high school at age sixteen and took to hunting full-time immediately after. She was convinced to slow it down by her grandparents and began preparing for college when her assignment at Cross Academy arrived and, uh, pretty tragically, hasn’t been able to attend any classes due to her work demands. Come to choose between the world and personal fulfillment? Her conscience only let her have one choice; a hunter must hunt.

♛ What they’ve been up to recently: - Work. There's hardly a time when this girl isn't working or planning what to do next, and the workload only grows after the previous president is outed as a dishonorable, self-serving traitor to the hunters. She's seriously injured after trading blows with him and is promptly benched to deal with the fallout and mental agony, but she's back within a year (and in K's crossover? Only six months later!).

- Having said that, Elizabeth does have days off and will spend them quietly with her friends, or alone with music and a rejuvenating swim.

- Depending on the time in her life? Her life circumstances vary drastically-- she can go from a young huntress travelling on her own as duty demands, or she can be a mother of five children and trusted right hand of the new hunter president, Zero Kiryuu. She lives for a long time, so she's always up to something! And of course, she's always motivated to fight for a better future.

♛ Where to find them: - Aside from work, check the beach! Or find her on methods of cross-continental transportation since she travels around the world for her job (she walks whenever possible, so it's rare to see her on a bus, but she’ll begrudgingly take one or a train)! Otherwise, a place like an aquarium, clothing store, or coffee shop, or any place in a city is your best chance.... write w me pls... q-q she is Around Somewhere.

- If not found in any of those places and your character is someone inside Cross Academy, she can be found there, helping the prefects in some way and is familiar enough with the building to help out new students if they ask.

♛ Current Plans: - Elizabeth is chained to her work as a hunter for as long as she draws breath, or until there is no need for her to end hostile vampires. Her ultimate goal is to keep the world from falling into a repeat, all-out war between vampires and humanity. Her living and family situation might change through the years, but that will always be her primary drive-- she's got an indomitable will.

♛ Desired Interactions: - please ovq

- In all seriousness, I’m up for pretty much anything. She needs more friends, more enemies, people to protect, people to be protected by, people she looks up to, people who legitimately unnerve her, everything! I just don’t feel comfortable killing her. Elizabeth fought really hard to get her future and deserves to find comfort after her entire childhood-young adult life was spent thinking the only thing of worth she had was her role as a huntress. I do really, really love angst though, so anything else goes, really c:

♛ Offered Interactions ( please sit tight for this! it will be divided into multiple sections! ) : - IF YOUR CHARACTER IS HUMAN: - She’ll assume your muse is an average civilian until shown otherwise (be it with unusual powers, whacky aura, combat prowess, or prior knowledge from a report or something-- a plot specific thing). Unless they truly know about vampires / work with the Hunters Association, Elizabeth will not be sharing any information about who or what she is without a legitimate reason (such as the human character being bitten by a Pureblood and thus is being turned into a vampire themselves). However, the other party being kept in the dark about vampires can open the door to a more relaxed Elizabeth without her professional, perfectionist mindset. She’s more likely to have a pleasant conversation with humans since they have no part in the hunt-- but in that same vein, she does aim to keep them at a certain distance and not develop a deep emotional bond (but she’s also a lot softer than she looks and acts and tends to care for others quickly, should they get along). It’s a tricky slope . . . She’s thawed out and the nicer aspects of her personality are far more prominent, but at the same time, she’s not being entirely genuine. Give her time and she’ll become more open about personal things, just, not her work.

- Applies to her K Proj. Crossover. Working with S4, Elizabeth takes some time to adjust, but ultimately loves the organization and the people within it. They’re an exception to her ‘no ties with average humans’ rule because....errr.... they’re not the average human she’s used to protecting and in that verse they’re aware of her occupation and peculiar heritage. She’s not as cold first impressions might suggest and loves Reisi’s weird af team building nights, it’s hard for her to not have a soft spot for them, even as an outsider and unofficial member (as in, she has none of the abilities the Blues have, but she has her natural abilities).

- IF YOUR CHARACTER IS A HUNTER: - Elizabeth is a known figure in hunter society; her great grandfather, grandfather, and aunt were previous heads of the organization and each are still alive at present. So, it probably makes more sense if your hunter character at the very least knows about her-- unless they’re an off-series muse in which case go wild and do what you think is best! I always did like the idea of two vampire hunters chilling together with neither one knowing the other is a fellow hunter until they’re attacked by a vamp and they’re both like ‘Oh!’

- A simple but always reliable plot idea is two hunters on a joint mission! It’s really important to know that Bethy does not take kindly to poor performance and expects her partner to take whatever assignment they have seriously. If not? Things get tundra-cold really fast-- o-o;; People’s lives are at stake and in her opinion, if a hunter wants to mope or complain about their blood-given obligation, they’re not fit to be hunters in the first place. ‘Can’t do the job? Then finish what you started with me if you have any shred of integrity, and get thee gone’ sort of thing. Otherwise, uh :’D;; she’s highly cooperative and always aims to reach the outcome with the least amount of damage.

- As a teenager, she attended a hunter-run private academy in Adrasteia for four years. If it’s possible for your muse to attend (as in, they are from a vampire hunter family and can pass the rigorous entrance exams), throw em in for a slightly younger, less stringent Bethy? A national fencing champion at the top of her classes, and great granddaughter to the legendary hellfire headmaster, Elizabeth’s not easily missed! It could be the start to an amicable relationship to carry into future interactions?

- IF YOUR CHARACTER IS A VAMPIRE: - Bluntly put, for vampires, it’s probably better to interact with Elizabeth after Cross Academy has fallen in the large battle that took place there. Her mother is revealed to have been alive and held captive as a vampire, she’s already friends with a hunter/vamp, her two friends turned out to be Purebloods, and ‘oh....my mother and father got together again and now I’ve got a younger vampire brother’ .....and her boyfriend’s half sister is also a vampire who marries the former vamp senate heir..... so...vamps everywhere; she simply accepts them as part of the family. Prior to that, while she isn’t hostile to vampires and certainly has no intention to attack a vamp unjustly, it’s not a place she’s eager to put herself in. Depending on how threatened she feels, she’ll even swallow her pride and keep her head down-- mostly.

- If your muse is a hunter-turned-vampire, she doesn’t treat them as a vampire, rather, she still sees them as a compatriot, like in the case of Zero Kiryuu. Whether or not your muse received the blood of their keeper is up to you, but in the case that they haven’t-- she’s always there to assist in granting mercy whenever the time comes :’)

- IF YOUR CHARACTER DOES NOT FIT INTO ANY OF THE ABOVE CATEGORIES / REGARDING OTHER VERSES: - Please help me find something that works, I’m willing to try! Memes are incredibly helpful! Send one in, the tag is here, and we can go from there!

- My currently finished and ready-to-use Crossover Verse is K Proj., which can be read about right here.

♛ Current Open Post/s: Linked right here. There's no expiration date to these, and it doesn't matter if another person has replied to one, you are more than welcome to reply to one if it catches your eye at all.

♛ Anything else?: YEAH, wow I am so sorry that got so long. Please note that this post may be updated periodically!

#( blog info. )#( SUPER LONG but if you're lost on some plotting things and aren't from VK #this should hopefully give you an idea of Elizabeth and her interactions? She's a tough one q - q )

4 notes · View notes

leonsat · 5 years

Text

hey friends! im so so thrilled to be here with you wonderful people! ~ i’m kay ( she/her / 20 / gmt+3 ) and i’ll be roleplaying as LEON, a defiant who constantly tries to hide his emotions, since his scientist / pseudo father passed away and told him to be ‘careful’. however, in reality, he’s kinda awful at it since he was practically raised as a human. you can find his bio HERE, and i managed to put together some shabby wanted connections HERE. i’d absolutely adore some plots, so either hit me up or hit that like button ♡ for me to jump into your ims. you can also find me at disc.rd @ kay#5119, where im much faster! and since the bio is unceremoniously long, here’s hopefully a shorter INTRO under the cut —-

— sato riku is a scientist extraordinaire, one of the head engineers of neatech. his work is well regarded and famous in its field. he works irregular hours, and on one day where he doesn’t go home, his house explodes due to a gas leak, killing both his wife and adopted son. he’s devastated, unable to comprehend how such thing can happen, how his life can change with something so insignificant — a neighbor forgetting to turn off their stove.

— it takes him some time, but he fuels all that anger and frustration, wants to play god with all his knowledge and skill. he decides to make a custom android, and to test the boundaries between humans and androids, to see how far he can go. people don’t notice, only glad that riku is back to his old self. meanwhile, leon is made, and riku doesn’t act like he’s an android at all. he acts as if leon’s made of flesh and blood, he tucks him to the bed, reads him bedtime stories, tells him anything and everything about himself.

— that turns to visits in the city, to parks, and with the more time they spend with each other, riku acts as if leon’s growing. it happens quickly, in the span of a few months, but he begins to read him more advanced things, private thoughts, more intimate matters from his own life. the connection between them grows stronger, and after a few more months, but what leon doesn’t know is that neatech is growing suspicious of riku’s pro-defiant stance.

— it has been a long time that leon’s been showing emotions, but as he sees small changes, his worry amplifies tenfold. he’s scared for riku, and tells him to be careful, perhaps move away and be careful about all the deals he is making at night. the man is elated to hear that, but there’s also disappointment in his voice when he tells leon that he will do no such thing.

— on one day when they come back to home, riku has a sudden heart attack. while he is helping him, paramedics arrive and take the man away, telling leon to standby. leon doesn’t want to believe such thing can happen, not when he has done a check up the day before, not when riku was completely healthy. it doesn’t make sense, and he quickly goes over the records of the day they spent together. he detects someone that he has never seen at the labs before, and after a quick research, he learns that the culprit has anti-android ties.

— it’s clear that it’s an assassination and leon feels like his whole world has stopped. he knows the protocol, it tells him to do nothing, but how can he? riku is dead, and he must do something. he calls the police, and they brush him off, tell him to hibernate until authorities arrive. he sits there on the couch, his hands shaking, unsure what the hell he should do. after a few hours, the tv turns on by itself, and riku’s prerecorded video begins to play.

— leon learns that riku has been expecting something like this for a long time, and that he prepared a bag for leon, alongside instructions about what he should do. riku tells him to run away, that he will be shut off otherwise. leon’s torn, his whole life has turned around, but he trusts riku more than anything. he packs the few important belongings they had before leaving the house, to never return again.

— ezi, a close friend takes him in, helps him so much that leon couldn’t get through this time alone. he begins working for bio-repair, and through ezi, he also gets to know about the defiant movement. sharing sentiment and wanting to help others, he joins them, hoping to make a change.

— he’s emotional and easily excited, pretends to be human and usually fits in. leon also tends to get too curious and emotional about things, and it’s likely that it shines through.

that’s it for now ! uhh, that’s not too short either and im so sorry, i tried my best !!!! i’d LOVE to plot and establish some connections; once again, you can find some wanted connections HERE ( i’d also love to brainstorm ) —- don’t hesitate to send me a message or smash that like ♡ button for me to magically appear in ur ims ! i have a discord @ kay#5119 as well, you can def add me over there too ! ily all already ♡♡♡

#《 𝚜𝚝𝚊𝚢 𝚘𝚞𝚝 𝚘𝚏 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚕𝚒𝚐𝚑𝚝 ┇—- ooc. 》

5 notes · View notes

jaeinxyj-blog · 5 years

Text

hello !!! i'm a bit late but i wanted to make sure that i got my intro out as soon as possible !! i don't have any cute nicknames or aliases, so you can just call me payton ( she/her ) ! pst timezone, big 'ol weeb and bts/girl group enthusiast . truthfully, i haven't written on tumblr in quite some time so i'm a little nervous... my writing isn't the greatest, but i can guarantee that i'll put in a ton of effort and what i lack in skill i'll make up for in enthusiasm and adoration for your muses asjdgdkjfhd but enough about me ! are you guys ready for the cutest girl in the world ??? this here is my happy pill jane ! 19 years old, born and raised in yongsa . i haven't finished writing up a proper bio for her yet, but you can find the most basic information here. under the cut i'll be leaving a few details to help you get an idea of what she's like, as well as a few wanted connections for anyone that's interested ! of course my inbox is always open to plotting, as well as my discord ( just ask if you don't have it already )

info !!

this girl has no tragic backstory !!! i don't do very well with angst bc *twt vc*im baby and i also felt like a character like jane wouldn't really.. have ?? a sad past? i just couldn't picture her personality being the way that it is if she'd gone through something sad or traumatic growing up.

as i mentioned before she was born and raised in yongsa! her parents own a small but relatively popular bakery in the outskirts of town, so they weren't wealthy but they definitely made enough for the family to live comfortably.

she's an only child. very coddled and very loved. definitely plays a big role in how she turned out so energetic and positive even when she got older.

she's in a band !!! she started the band in no hurry with her friends in her first year of high school after spontaneously deciding to pick up the guitar in middle school. nothing too intense or heavy, just music that jane and her bandmates have fun making and performing. she's the guitarist and vocalist.

that being said, she can almost always be seen carrying around or playing her guitar. that's her baby.

super positivity energy love blast !!! . . . or . . . something like that ? she's just. a ball of neverending optimism and energy. tbh it's probably more exhausting for the people around jane than it is for herself. good luck

likes just about anything and has practically zero dislikes unless they're food related or just. people being mean for no reason.

very honest and straightforward. often fails to read the mood and will say things that don't need to be said. please do not rely on her to back you up on a lie, especially on the spot. she cannot do it. she will fail you.

weeb. likes to watch anime, read manga, play video games. she especially likes romance and fantasy genres, but tends to be drawn to just about anything that has cute or attractive characters in it.

very sensitive. very. she feels her emotions very intensely regardless of what they are. she has a hard time showing this side of herself to others, and especially around those that she's close to, as she feels that her energy and positive attitude are her best way of encouraging and being there for her friends. when upset, the feeling usually doesn't last very long and she's able to get over it quickly, with the only exception being if she feels especially hurt by something.

i . . . am not sure what else to put here honestly ajsdfhnkd feel free to message me if you have any specific questions!

wanted plots !!

the best friend. could be a childhood friend, or just someone she grew closer to over time. this person is closest to jane and knows her better than anyone else. could work with multiple people as well; i'm all for a best friend group !!

the unlikely pair. jane and this person are complete opposites, and yet somehow they've managed to become friends ( let's be honest, jane probably just followed them around and bugged them until they eventually caved and warmed up to her asjdhndfh ). many people don't understand how the two of them get along so well, but jane considers them a very close and dear friend .

#1 die-fan. pretty self-explanatory. this person knows of and actively supports jane's band, going to as many live performances as possible and cheering her on. whether they're just a fan of the music, or if it's because they're close to jane herself doesn't really matter -- their constant support means the world to her.

the first love. hehe, i had to include this one. jane, despite being the type to romanticize just about anything, has no actual experience with romance. all that she knows of it is what she's seen in dramas and anime, read in manga and webtoons. surprisingly, the thought of falling love, or having someone fall in love with her, has never really crossed her mind. that's why, when she falls for this person, she's a complete mess about it. painfully obvious, probably, always trying to impress them and get their attention even if her methods come across as ridiculous. cute pining. could or could not be requited, completely up to you.

the guardian. to put it simply, jane's personality worries them. they're very aware of how ditzy, forgetful and clumsy she can be. through some way or another, they find themselves taking care of her and giving her advice. she's a handful, and this person will often remind her of this, but her positivity and gratitude are endearing, so they don't exactly hate it.

keep it down !! sometimes when jane can't make it out to the studio to practice, or when she gets a sudden spark of inspiration, jane will just practice her guitar and singing at home. the only problem is that she can be a bit . . . noisy when doing so. this person in particular is especially bothered by it. no matter how many times they've come to complain, and no matter how many times jane tries to laugh it off and apologize, it just seems to keep happening . . .

#yj:intro #( ooc. )#( i tend to ramble i apologize asjdfhnkdfh )#( pls love jane she is a good person !!! )

5 notes · View notes

fictionkinfessionsarchived · 6 years

Text

Hi!! I’ve been thinking about the ask response guidelines! Partly because nobody apparently reads them, and partly because the have not been updated since Mod Maude installed them! Which may be why nobody reads them: they’re old and outdated! :V Uh oh!

Since this blog has grown and changed since 2016 [wow!], I thought maybe they could be freshened up and changed from what they currently are! Here are the newly rewritten ones! If anyone has suggestions for them, I would appreciate the input! To add something, or to remove something, or to reword a confusing sentence, and so on! I mean, I kinda feel ‘dont be a jerk’ is sort of obvious, but it seems helpful to have a guidelines type page to refer to as the most basic guide for a code of conduct!

Also I’d like for people to stop being so mean in ask responses! Like, have I ever posted an AR that was totally vitriolic? Who is encouraging people to be mean like that? What the?! im confus!

Here’s a link to the page: http://fictionkinfessions.tumblr.com/ars

And here are the not quite confirmed updates to the ask response guidelines:

Ask Response Guidelines and FAQ

Rules:

#1 Don’t be a jerk.

The one hard, unbreakable rule! Please remember you are speaking with a stranger. Perhaps your close friend is fine with hearing “holy fuck are you out of your mind? There’s no way that this happened, that character was implying this, etc etc.” But complete strangers on the internet may not understand if you are joking or mean that in a casual manner. Especially since emotions and tone of voice can be difficult to discern through only text, without additional body and vocal language and so on. Assuming you are able to read body language since that is kind of difficult for some people.

#2 Do not send in threats.

No rape threats, suicide baiting, suicide threads, death threats, etc. This one may get you ip blocked. Consider yourself warned.

Do and Do Nots [or rather, more bendable code of conduct than hardcoded guidelines]:

💖 Do remember the person may be referring to their personal experiences/canons. Particularly if they are speaking of events, people, or relationships, etc that do not resemble the known source canon. Kinsplaining a person’s source to them is kind of a drag.

💖 Do ask someone to contact you off anon. If you want someone to contact you on a side blog, please reblog the relevant confession mentioning this. Trust me, people do check post notes for friendly faces! :3

💖 Do offer to make a kincord, or invite an confessor to join a discord if they mention an interest in finding one for a kintype or canon, be it an unusual or obscure one.

💖 Do not ask someone to interact with your anonymous ask response message in order to contact you. Again, please do reblog a post requesting contact or come off anon. It’s scary to put yourself out there, I know, but I’m sure you’ll get much better results that way.

💖 Do not tell someone to simply blacklist a thing they are displeased with seeing. I guarantee that if they could, they have already blacklisted it. Additionally, sometimes a fandom at large does not tag something they see as good, or popular, or personally unobjectionable. [Party note: does this need to be said? I feel it could be already covered under Rule #1 ]

💖 ??? idk what else? Suggestions for do or don’ts?

FAQ:

what are ask responses?

They are anonymous or non-anonymous ask messages sent in reply to a posted confession. Generally they are sent because the person does not wish to come off anon, or are not publicly kin or presenting as a system on their main blog. They are generally available alongside with or replacing post replies. It depends if post replies are enabled. Both are legitimate ways of responding to someone, in addition to reblogging a confession.

How do I send in an ask response?

Simply send in an ask message. It is suggested, but not required, that you also put a ‘@’ symbol at the start of your message to make it clear it’s an ask response. That way it will be posted ASAP, and not mistaken for a confession. There are many confessions posted per day, and sometimes we mods are not sure if an ask message is a response or confession. Hence the suggested use of an ‘@’ symbol. However it’s required and you don’t have to use an ‘@’ symbol every time.

Did you get my ask response?

We might have! It could still be on the queue since we intersperse the ask responses between confessions so it’s not a deluge of a single type of post. Or we may not have received it. Please feel free to send in an ask about where it might have gone, and what keywords or topics we can search for to find it with.

Why didn’t you post my ask response?

It may have gone against the Ask Response Guidelines [see above] or tumblr ate it due to spam detection. Feel free to resend it and we’ll post it asap. Or it’s simply that we didn’t realize it was an ask response until a day or so afterwards. In which case we’ll queue it up to post asap with the latest ask responses.

I didn’t like that ask response to my confession, and honestly don’t appreciate it’s response for personal reasons.

I'm sorry. We do vet responses so that they are not derogatory, overly hateful or vitriolic, or explaining things you the confessor may already know. If we post an ask response, it's because we feel it may be helpful to you or others, or feels generally neutral, or may be positive and cheering towards you or others. If you consider an ask response to your confession crosses a line, please feel free to let us know and we'll handle it somehow.

I’m not going to read all those words in the guidelines. What’s the tldr?

Be nice! Don’t be mean! Write like you’re messaging someone for the first time and you want to make a good impression! No threats of any kind!

#not confessions #blog pages #mod posts #mod party cat!#ask response guidelines

16 notes · View notes

onisionhurtspeople · 6 years

Note

i’m 100% for lainey labeling their gender in whatever way feels right for them, dressing however feels right, and using whatever pronouns feel right. i’m not gonna doubt or question their identity or anyone else’s. what rubs me the wrong way is how they emulate and almost fetishize the “teen” aesthetic. when they’ve said they look like a 12 year old boy and implied that it was attractive/hot/a good thing, i was kinda creeped out. idk how to explain it but i think it sends a really bad message.

Ah, yeah, that’s another thing I’ve been considering writing about for a while: how much Lainey seems to fetishize adolescence. Get ready for another one of my pointless tl;drs that nobody ever reads or cares about, y’all!

If Lainey was removed from the context surrounding the reasons why we all spend so much time scrutinizing her behavior in the first place, I doubt most people would have a problem with the fact that she seems almost pathologically obsessed with portraying herself as a 15-year-old girl in both style and personality, rather than as the 23-year-old wife and mother of two that she is.

But the issue, of course, is that Lainey’s preferences do not exist in a vacuum; they mean something, and that’s what we’re here to analyze. She is married to a man who fetishizes teenage girls himself, because they’re easier to control and manipulate. She indulges in, and relates to, a culture that heavily emphasizes youth and immaturity (referring to boyfriends as “daddy”, having a DDlg (Daddy Dom/little girl) fetish, being “taken care of” by men (and treated like a little princess in bed), constantly alluding to not knowing what they’re doing in life, assuming a guileless pose in selfies that reflect a certain youthful confusion and spontaneity, constantly referencing their childlike habits (”touch my butt and buy me pizza”, “I have no idea what I’m doing”, “im a crybaby” flavors of meme), dressing like a 12-year-old in overalls, children’s Pokemon panties, and pastel-colored hair and clothing with simplistic, childlike patterns, etc - not that I think there’s anything inherently wrong with any of these things, but all of these pieces of the puzzle fit together to paint the picture of a person who is unhealthily obsessed with living out their life as a teenager. You guys know the ~aesthetic~ that I’m trying to drive at here).

She indulges in cultural trends targeted towards children and young teens. Her entire personality revolves around sensitivity, helplessness, passivity; she exudes anxiety, uncertainty, and confusion; and openly discusses being so sensitive that she becomes completely overwhelmed by even the most simple of tasks that adults are expected to be able to do. And again, I’m not saying that these are inherently negative traits (although obviously when these qualities run your life, it can become problematic); but Lainey seems almost proud of these traits. She’s more than just open about it. She brags about them. She romanticizes them. She constructs elaborate internal fantasies around them. Her entire identity revolves around being a ~smol sensitive anxious space prince daddy~.

On top of all these things, almost everybody that she hangs out with or considers to be her friend (from Sarah, who lives with her, all the way down to the girls who she interacts with on Discord) is a teenager. She does not speak to women her own age. It’s bizarre. I used to have a friend who was quite a bit younger than me, by three and a half years - the first time we met in real life was on her 16th birthday, and I was 19, almost 20; and despite the fact that we were best friends and that I had so many other friends my own age, there was a very obvious and noticeable difference in our maturity levels. I’m not saying that uneven friendships like this can’t work or are inherently inappropriate, but again, within the context of Lainey’s life, it’s an enormous red flag that she seems to be unable to relate with women her own age, and can only form friendships with teenage girls between the ages of 15 and 21. Even outside of the context of her marriage (because let’s not forget that she’s married to a man who openly admits to having a sexual preference for young women, because they’re at “peak fertility” according to him), the fact that she relates the most with teenage girls is a huge indication that Lainey herself is either a) extremely mature, b) purposely seeks to enter uneven friendships with younger girls because it balances the friendship in her favor, giving her more power and control (which wouldn’t surprise me if true, given that she’s married to Onision - she needs to be able to exercise control in SOME way), c) is emotionally stunted and frozen at the age of ~18 due to Onision’s influence on her psychological development, or d) a sexual predator who herself prefers teenage girls. I’m sure everybody has their own theory on why this is, but personally I think it’s probably a mixture of all four, with option c being the most prominent motivation.

I think Lainey projects herself onto teenage girls because she feels very much unprepared for this world, threatened by it, and does not trust her own ability to navigate adulthood successfully. In this regard, I think Greg managed to find almost a perfect partner for himself - a girl who is trapped in her adolescence in perpetuity (largely by choice, but partly through direction by Onision), who purposely cuts herself off from growing and learning and emerging as a young adult because it’s less dangerous and challenging for her to remain within her psychological safe zone, being coddled like a baby and completely controlled and taken care of by Greg, who looks after all of the hard things in her life that she struggles with (doing taxes, making money, going outside to get groceries, paying bills, interacting with strangers, making appointments, earning a living wage) - all of the practical, adult things that Lainey is terrified of doing, because it’s so overwhelming to her. Greg, of course, loves this. Lainey is his ideal partner: a woman who needs to be with a man like him, who defines her entire identity for her. A man who directs her, tells her what to do, is domineering and aggressive, and who makes all of her decisions for her. Tells her what to do, who to be, what to feel, how to act. A man who has complete control over every aspect of her life. A narcissist (him) and an inverted narcissist, or codependent (her).

And so this is why Lainey is so obsessed with portraying herself as a teenager. Teenagers hit that sweet spot in between childhood and adulthood that Lainey feels trapped by in perpetuity. On the one hand, she is not a child - she is a sexual being; she has kinks, and preferences, and desires to express herself and her sexual identity. On the other hand, though, neither is she an adult - she is immature, self-absorbed, has an unstable sense of self, doesn’t know who she is, hypersensitive, anxious, gets overwhelmed easily, indulges often in her learned helplessness, and makes no attempt to change any of this - she revels in her dysfunction; she romanticizes it. And there is no age that typifies this combination of traits better than a teenage girl does. She doesn’t just relate to teenagers; she wants to be a teenager, forever–and in some ways, she really is, because the interference of Greg on Lainey’s emotional, psychological, social, and sexual growth has had a catastrophic impact on her development. She is essentially a 16-year-old girl trapped within the body of a 23-year-old mother of two. And that’s exactly what she wants.

I think what’s ultimately going to be what destroys Greg and Lainey’s marriage is that eventually, Lainey is going to be too old for Greg, and he’s going to feel compelled to pick up another 17-, 18-, and 19-year-old girl again from his existing pool of die-hard fans. Already it’s quite apparent that Greg is bored of Lainey (as evidenced by the fact that he is still actively trying to find women to cheat on her with, even after what happened with Billie); but once the cost of maintaining her becomes more expensive than the cost of replacing her with a new, hot, young, alternative, impressionable teenage girl, he will do what he tried to do once before with Billie, and eject Lainey in favor of a new wife to manipulate. And the whole process will start all over again, until the day that either Greg dies, or he becomes incapable of drawing in new women. And at that point, sadly, the fact that Lainey is still a teenager - but only on the inside - will end up becoming the most painful struggle of her life, when she is forced to take on all of the adult responsibilities that Greg currently carries for her, and realizes that she is dangerously under-qualified to live her life as an adult woman instead of a pampered, permanent 16-year-old girl.

(Sadly - or maybe luckily - I think that Lainey is the type of woman who needs to be in a relationship with someone like Greg (an inverted narcissist; in other words, a codependent), so I guess here’s to hoping that when this inevitably happens, she will quickly find herself a new narcissist to date and define her entire identity for her, I suppose?)

Press F to pay respects for this ridiculously, unnecessarily long fucking essay that I just wrote that NOBODY is going to read. Praise the Noodle Lord. Amen.

#onision #laineybot #anti onision #anti-onision #narcissism #npd #still gonna use the npd tag #deal with it

409 notes · View notes

xurkitips · 6 years

Text

On Conveying Personality Through Chatroom-style Dialogue

A friend of mine shared screenshots of a roleplay he was having via a Discord server, wherein the style was chatroom/texting based. Each character would have a different style of typing completely unique to their person. Though unfamiliar with all of them, I could see what their personalities were like

Like real human beings, a character very much so has a “voice”. I mean that both in the literal sense, through their manner of speaking and what they say, but also through their self expression, interests, and actions. This carries over into the digital realm in ways we may not even notice. Text messages may not be verbal, no, but there are ways to show inflection.

There are many, many ways to show meaning through text. Here are some that I’ve picked up and utilized with my own characters:

Sentence structure

all lowercase sentences VS Grammatically correct

Lowercase gives off the feeling of someone familiar with others or willing to become familiar. It lacks the tension of formal writing, complete with its capitalization and proper periods ending sentences, and feels very casual and approachable. It may also be a sign of someone who doesn’t care much about perfection, a lazy person, or an easy going individual. Seems like a lot of internet regulars prefer this kind of typing style.

“im dying

‘deafening horrorcore rap’ ok i listen to literal noise and idk what this even is”

Using a properly capitalized and punctuated style is very formal, like one would see in a book, an official email, etc. It’s more serious and stern than lowercase is and may imply an older, more mature person typing...or maybe just someone trapped on their phone at the mercy of autocorrect.

"I am always happy to see you, even if you are not feeling your best.“

“It's nice here.

Quiet.”

There’s a certain respectful steadiness to it as well. It can be calming to read at times.

Punctuation VS Lack of punctuation

End-stopped lines come with both a pause and a bit of a pointed and direct feeling. It strengthens both lowercase and grammatically correct styles, but in different ways. In conjunction with “proper” writing, it’s less noticeable, merely giving the reader a moment’s pause. In conjunction with lowercase, especially if the one typing isn’t keen on using periods, it can come off as stern, serious, passive-aggressive, or angry.

“whatever.

it's less excruciating than it would be without it.”

Removal of punctuation is a different story. Typically just shown with lowercase, it leaves it with that casual feeling intact, or like one’s sentences are more like quick thoughts or questions. Removing them from grammatically correct sentences does ease off some of the tension, implying someone with a more neutral-positive tone while still being more mature.

“I’m not terribly good with conversation”

And then there’s the run-on sentences from those who type small novels per response. Usually complete with multiple and’s. It’s a sign of nervousness, enthusiasm, or oftentimes a younger character...

“actually i don't know much about it i just happened to see something online and it's apparently only manufactured overseas exclusively for this one particular shop and they made the original design and initial product i guess”

Oof.

Proper spelling (or lack thereof)

The better the spelling, the more the likelihood of the person being older, calmer, or neutral. There’s also a sense of being well educated or careful about one’s typing. Perhaps a confident air may exude from what they say, too.

“Can you come help me for a moment?”

Those who make a lot of mistakes will simply confuse words for other words, forget apostrophes, or type too fast to notice things missing or in the wrong location. Some just don’t really care enough or are too tired to deal with it. Too much focus and people know what they mean anyway. Probably.

“i laug hso hard hes come runin

he thougt i aws dyin”

It can also happen in very emotional situations, in bouts of laughter, crying, rage, or when one is drowsy, medicated, or sick. It tends to stand out when one’s style is suddenly very, very different and tips others off to something being wrong.

Younger characters, especially kids, also make spelling mistakes all the time depending on their age, whether due to sounding out words or just in a hurry to reply.

Short sentence fragments, single words, and lengthy paragraphs

Sometimes people with rapid-fire thoughts, who are excited, busy, stressed, or angry, will take to quick and short responses (sometimes of many fragments in a row). These show a similar feeling as do lines of poetry. Stacking small fragments on top of one another adds emphasis. The reader has to read them one by one rather than as a straight sentence. On its own, the word or fragment stands out and becomes more important.

"well

yeah thats

what i was tryina do

but i mean”

I’ve seen it used used for storytelling from one person to another in larger chunks of things, quick responses, for poetic value, and in irritation or passive-aggressiveness.

In full sentence conversations sent in short bursts, it’s also allowing the reader pause to read each comment without it feeling like a novella. Though it can also feel like someone is obnoxious, rambling on and on as the notifications keep coming, or has a lot to talk about and keeps thinking of more.

Then there are those who type rather large responses all at once instead of hitting the enter key with every sentence:

"Whoever did it was quite thorough; either the power in that area of the lab was cut while we were distracted or they tampered with the security cameras, because that footage is missing. But, we have some theories now. It had to have been someone with direct access to the laboratory. I hesitate to place blame on any of my coworkers...they're all my trusted companions and friends! And yet...”

It’s concise and a solid, complete story in one spot. Could be someone who loves to talk, could be someone who didn’t want a response before they were done talking. It’s also commonly seen by middle-aged texters who want to say everything they can all at once.

Exclamation points and Question marks

Simple one here. Question mark for a question or confusion, exclamation point for emphasis or an exclamation. But when a person adds multiple to a sentence it can convey more of the person’s feelings;

“are you okay??”

Here is someone who is very concerned. Multiple question marks can imply things such as worry, stress, disbelief, and shock. There’s a sense of hurry and tension. Perhaps the person on the other end is frightened, easily afraid, or tends to have an overwhelming reaction to things.

“oh!!! it’s nice to see you!!!”

!!!

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”

Meanwhile, multiple exclamation points convey much more friendlier, happier tones. Often such things as surprise, excitement, happiness, friendliness. Users typing !! as a punctuation (like I tend to do) may do it as an assurance or to show how thrilled they are to talk. Occasionally !!!! is tacked onto an angry statement to be more of a shout, but I see it less and less.

Chatspeak and Internet habits

Shortenings of words have been a regular thing for ages. It’s easy, convenient, and gets the point across quickly. But the internet has taken it to a new extreme, where sentences can be almost entirely compromised of them.

“wtf r u talkin abt?? gdi man idk wuts even happening rn”

A character wanting to be quick to respond, always on the ball, always involved, may be more likely to utilize and understand chatspeak. They’re the social butterfly of the group. It’s also a sign of a long-time internet lurker who’s aware of what the lingo is, and how to use it. A complete lack thereof points toward either an older user or someone who’s unused to social media.

The more memes, the harder someone is trying to fit in. Or maybe they’re easily amused or just absorbed things from their friends without thinking about it. The comedian of the group is going to know the best ways to use them.

Smilies and Emojis

:D D: :DDD // :3 3: >:3 :3c // :o :O O:<

These kinds of smilies have always struck me as the most friendly. Whether used in devious ways or with genuinely heartwarming intentions, the playful, lightheartedness of the user really shines through these.

"not a bad way to spend a lazy day :D”

“it's also my birthday :3″

It’s got just the right vibe to punctuate a sentence that’ll leave the reader feeling that the person likely means no harm or wants to be friendly, positive, or encouraging. I’ve met a lot of people that use these and turn out to be very kind or considerate people.

:), ;), ((((: and related

A long time positive, friendly smiley.

"You said you've known them a long time? I think they would understand. :)”

And yet these days I tend to associate it with passive aggressive statements, plotting, slyness, devious behavior, or anger. Older users may be inclined to use :) as a means to show their emotional state, but newer users seem more inclined to do the opposite. The more parentheses there are, the more upset the person, it seems.

“man don’t u love it when the power’s out in the middle of the night it’s just (((: really great thanks (((((:”

Then the ;) smiley comes off more specifically flirty and a bit playful. Doesn’t seem to change much there.

“if i find a good chance 2 hook u up ill do my best ;)”

The bane of my teenage existence. It’s a more old school sign of laughter, rarely seen in today’s world due to falling out of favor and becoming associated with, “LOL Rawr XD Tacos I’m So Randoom,” culture. But time to time you do see it. Mostly with sarcasm but sometimes with genuine intentions.

“xDddddDDD

It was a good joke. XD”

A character using it genuinely comes off more playful, and to me, personally, as an older person who’s genuinely unaware of the associations with the smiley itself trying to show how they laughed without using LOL.

Letter/Character smilies

Y’know, things like .w. and ._. or owo, where the letters or symbols make a face. These are fairly popular, it seems. I don’t like using them myself, but know a few who do use them.

"I'm sorry that they can be mean qmq”

It’s a different feel from the others. There’s something soft to it, almost a gentleness. When these or Japanese characters are used, there’s more whimsy. It’s cute and almost a bit feminine. It may convey an open person or give the impression that said person is easier to talk to.

Though honestly I can’t see uwu and owo as anything but heavily sarcastic. I’ll be honest with you.

Emojis

The first rule of Xurkitips club is that we don’t talk about Emoji Movie. Just putting that out there riiight now.

Used sparingly by most for fun and for emphasis. Characters may use them to be lighthearted, aesthetically, joke, or to make a conversation more flavorful. The use of emojis may determine a character’s personality; I find that characters who use hand emojis like 👌 are rather laid back, those who use 🙃 do it passive aggressively, and we all know what kind of person uses 🍆.

Then there’s what in common terms known as, “The DudeBro”:

[MFKNSTARBOI]: the thing i never undstood about hair is why people buy shampoo like regular soap not good enough for you LMAO 😂😂😂

[gostones]: .

[BIGDICKTOYOTA69]: what the fuck man

[ahogekun]: do... you not use shampoo

[MFKNSTARBOI]: aaaah you guys got sucked into big shampoo as well 😔

[MFKNSTARBOI]: When it comes to horses 🐎 the stars in the sky ✨ or just man to man no bullshit advice 👬 IM youre guy 😤😂

I think this one speaks for itself.

#writing advice #milo's writing advice #writing tips #CRY THROUGH😭💦💦THE PAIN😢😩😩BUT KEEP GOING👀💯💪THE HUSTLE 😈👌NEVER ENDS🕛🕧🕟🚫STUDENT ATHLE

4 notes · View notes

cardcaptorscout · 7 years

Text

these past two weeks have been awful and im really the only person to depend on and i think the actual worst thing is nobody actually understanding and this isnt some like haha im all alone joke like straight up no one just understands and ive yuet to find something that i can somehow relate to ?

ive been drowning myself in video games and background noise to distract myself and while its doing a very good job, im thankful that im 19 years old and a lot more ~~~mature~~~ than i was when i was 15/16 because i probably wouldve just started yelling at everyone and everything because i must be losing my god damn mind and im seriously taken aback as to how nicely ive takent hese past two weeks because its really like . really fucked me up and just no one understands! my family doesnt understand and the people i choose to surround myself with have their own problems and this isnt some like, haha i dont want to bother my friends xD but i do at the same time xD like i REALLY dont and i absolutely refuse to tell anyone but me myself and i what happened because honestly i just dont think i feel comfortable talking to anyone anymore about anything personal and ive sort of closed myself in to even my boyfriend i made the mistake of telling someone what happened and like obviously i didnt expect much but their reaction was just very,,, lackluster and it made me realize that some things are better left unsaid . and i dont really think im purposefully doing this to like bottle up my emotions or something or like hurt myself in some way because even though i do tthis most of the time im able to just cool it out and i have but today was absolutely like it was the icing on this stupid ass cake like today was just awful LMAO

i woke up really fucking pissed and read discord messages that pissed me off and then got online bns and furthermore was pissed off again and it was like, ok just chill out just take it slow and realize why ur angry and fix it from there

and i did it! i mean i thought i did! but the mood stayed and ive been fucking upset all day and i dont want to talk to anyone or message anyone or accomodate for anything and ive just been beyond pissed for a majority of the day and just like anything is setting me off and even the things i found would distract me also really fucking pissed me off today so at this point i dont even like lowercase lol because im not laughing understand what i should be doing and this is NOT a questioj and also ????? i realize that today that the best way to judge people is from how they talk about others who’ve done anything but just bc theyre out of the norm and u realize that they could never be ur friend and its the worst . but also that u cant really .. get mad at people osmetimes because they dont know what ur going through and u cant really fault them for not being considerate of special things in a way lowercase lol which is why ive never gotten mad so far i mean i get a little snarky but then i just play it off and whether or not they believe it is a different story but being able to control my emotions is the only thing i got going for me right now but i actually feel like i might explode !not like burst into sadness or anything but i think i just need a break from people for a while ecks dee

anyways in order to sum it up my entire mood today has been the song what do i know by copeland

4 notes · View notes