still playing oot and I am devastated to learn that every time i get stuck on a puzzle i can no longer pass the controller over to my dad to do for me.

Retrospective Author’s Notes

I just crossposted this note to the Wattpad and AO3 copies of Maplestar’s Light, but I’m going to post it here, too.

Hi there! My name is Razeru. First of all, thank you very much for reading my story!

I think, if you've read my story, you can surmise that I love Mapleshade. She's grown to be one of my favourite characters in Warrior Cats; her story, narratively, is written the best - in my opinion - out of most of the super editions and novellas.

Keep in mind, these words are coming from someone who grew up with these books, and also gets big mad about the things the Erins have pulled on other characters, like Squirrelflight (specifically Squilf, actually. They keep doing my girl dirty, and I'm so angry).

I took a read through my story again recently, and passed through the comments both on this Wattpad copy of the story, and the AO3 mirror. I really and truly appreciate all the love, but some people did seem to misunderstand the intention behind some things in my story, so I feel like I owe a bit of an explanation to you, my readers.

I offer this explanation because I've chosen to abandon the MapleWind AU entirely. There's too much in retrospect that I'm unhappy with, too many story ideas that don't connect narratively - it just makes a poor story. So, this is basically a big spoiler chapter for what would have happened, if I continued.

The remainder of this letter is just going to be me giving a word vomit about this story, so feel free to skip down to the bottom if you're only curious about closing remarks or projects surrounding other upcoming warriors works.

Alright. First and foremost, I want to address something specific. Mapleshade's story, as it was in canon, is a multidimensional story that a lot of people see as black-and-white. I, personally, see it as a fantastic narrative where not a single character is in the right, at least not in the context of the Clans - or morally, in some cases. This being said, a lot of the arguments about Mapleshade are usually "she's absolutely terrible and deserved what she got" / "she did absolutely nothing wrong and everyone else should be suffering" - both of which are... Very, very dangerous views to take on any person or character. When I wrote Maplestar's Light, my intention was to explore the idea where a few cats stepped out of the norm that seemed to affect this specific generation of the Clans and offered sanctuary.

WindClan has always felt like the most lax Clan out of the four, to me. With their history of welcoming in strangers and making kindly bargains with the other Clans in their times of need, it made sense to me that if a wandering cat passed out on their territory, they would reach out and help them. I chose Heatherstar specifically for this story because she was such a revolutionary, and wasn't afraid to shoot down any cat's words if she felt someone was going to get hurt.

Moreover, this AU explores the idea that instead of sleeping in Myler's barn and then going on her rampage, Mapleshade simply collapsed into grief - so Ravenwing, Frecklewish, and Appledusk all survive. Temporarily.

While Mapleshade is taken into WindClan, Mapleshade's kits are restless, and it's their turn to be angry - assuming StarClan spirits know everything (and it's heavily implied, in the first series, that they do), they pull strings just like the canonical iteration of their mother would. Ravenwing, Frecklewish, Appledusk, and - moreover - Oakstar, all suffer painful deaths as a result of the angry StarClan kits. To add insult to injury, all four lose their lives to the river while patrolling it - or are tricked into falling in. The kits drag them down until they drown.

Ravenwing and Oakstar are the only two who are able to make it to StarClan themselves, if only because of the good acts they've done to balance out the karma. The kits, however, are able to swing judgement on Frecklewish, who attacked their mother, insulted them, and was fine to watch them die, and Appledusk, who was willing to have them to begin with, who failed to save them.

This is unhealthy point of view, but they died as kits. All they know is the anger and betrayal.

On to the future.

Maplestar and Palebird have the three kits; Finchkit, Larkkit, and Firekit. Some people didn't seem to get it, and I thought I wrote it to be obvious, but Firekit is supposed to be THE Firestar in the future. With Maplestar at the helm of WindClan, ShadowClan is unable to drive them out. ThunderClan, however, is much weaker after their constant battles with RiverClan and the loss of not only Redtail, but many other great warriors. ThunderClan is driven out instead; WindClan, in their graciousness, would allow them to share the territory until something can be done about ShadowClan's terrible leader, and three Clans would unite against the one to protect their way of life.

During their time in WindClan's camp, Firepaw would grow close to the ThunderClan apprentices Ravenpaw, Graypaw and Sandpaw. Following the battle against Brokenstar, not only do Firepaw and his siblings get their warrior names, but so do the ThunderClan apprentices who participated (Sandstorm and Dustpelt included). Fireheart realizes during the night of his vigil that he doesn't want to lose his ThunderClan friends, and while meeting his family on the battlefield would be painful, he would feel worse fighting Graystripe or Ravenflight - the latter tom being the only cat Fireheart has met that makes his heart flutter.

The following day, as ThunderClan returns home, Fireheart goes with them. Yellowfang, in turn, has joined ThunderClan, having been a crucial asset to getting them in and out of ShadowClan. In return for the WindClan warrior, Spottedleaf stays; Spottedleaf had been attacked by a ShadowClan warrior the day before the battle, but Hawkheart protected her with his life. Feeling indebted, she swore to finish training Barkwing and serve WindClan just as she did ThunderClan.

The rest of the story would have gone similarly to canon, with a few minor changes; for one, WindClan and ThunderClan would forever have a close bond, not only through the blood of their Clanmates, but also through Bluestar and Maplestar, who exchanged each other's stories and bonded over how similar they were. Cinderpelt would have still gotten disabled, but through saving the ShadowClan apprentice Littlepaw from a monster; while she picks up healing from Yellowfang, she remains a warrior in spite of her leg. Swiftpaw narrowly survives, and Brightpaw lives with her scarring still, taking inspiration from Cinderpelt. Fireheart and Ravenflight become mates and have kits - Squirrelflight and Gingerpool.

I had further plans for TNP and PO3, but they're sort of lost to time at this point. The general ideas surrounded Brambleclaw - renamed Brambleflower - taking after his mother instead of his father, and being close friends with Squilf, but not mates. Gingerpool and Crowfeather do have kits, and Squilf does take them, but claims they were loner kits that she chose to raise. Bramble was their nursery parent, having chosen to be a queen instead of a warrior, and took care of them while Squilf went about being a warrior, only tuning in to feed them and sleep with them. Jay would have become a warrior named Jayclaw and Holly, an albino in this AU, would go on to be Gingerpool's apprentice and become Hollysnow. Jay is blind, and Holly is a selective mute. Lion would still have his powers of strength, but use them unwisely, and he would be the one to wind up having a crisis and revealing the secrets of his origin before disappearing into the caves.

The general idea for the OOTS arc of this AU was to give Ivy powers and still have her train in the Dark Forest, under Lionblaze - who is very much still alive, but misaligned. Dovewing would be given the opportunity as well, and only take it when she learns Tigerheart is also training there. Their struggles would surround a constant sibling rivalry, one that would deepen once Jay and Holly figure out Ivy is the third cat. I also threw around the idea of a deaf Ivypool, either from birth or caused by something much later - just to complete the "See/Speak/Hear No Evil".

The underlying, long plot to the AU was that Petalkit, Larchkit, and Patchkit effectively replaced Canon Mapleshade. Maplestar recovered, then seemingly forgot about her previous kits and replaced them with Fire, Finch and Lark. Petal, Larch and Patch want stupid, special Firestar and his bloodline to suffer for being their replacements. Technically, they were still spirits of StarClan, but pulled the strings in the Dark Forest.

Oh, boy. Those sure were a lot of words, huh.

I hope I'm not disappointing anyone by discontinuing this story. Again, looking back on it, I'm very unhappy with the way I was handling certain subjects and aspects of the story - and I'd rather kill it before I get carried away again. I've always held the belief that taking time and writing a more consise and well-placed narrative is much better than writing it quickly and breaking characters and morals. Mapleshade is a character I do want to do justice by, and Warrior Cats is a great sandbox to play in!

All that being said, I am still writing Warriors works. On AO3, I've published a couple smaller one-off stories that explore the idea of Tigerclaw not getting twisted up by Thistleclaw, and getting Scourge to join ThunderClan instead. You're welcome to read them if you haven't yet!

And I'm not done with Mapleshade, either. I'm currently working on a new, seperate Warriors rewrite based on the same time (with better allegiances); the working title for it, right now, is Falling Petals. I don't want to give too much away, but if there's enough interest, I might post a teaser excerpt to this story! There's no telling when I'll be finished with it, but I would much rather publish a finished work in full than post it by chapter and run the risk of losing interest or being unhappy with what I've put out.

A final project I'm working on is a personal Warrior Cats story called Rising Storm - it'll surround some OC Clans and Characters instead of rewriting canon material, and I'm looking for a main platform to post it on when I crack into it! If you're interested, I could use some beta readers when I start working on it, so please get in touch if you want to help out! If you know any non-Wattpad or AO3 websites I could publish the story on, please do let me know. I'll likely crosspost here, but I don't actively post on here too often, so I'd rather it not be the primary host.

I think that's everything I wanted to say! Again, thank you so much for your continued interest in my work. If you'd like to see more of what I do, look for the user 'ghastimafrix' on Tumblr, Twitter, YouTube, deviantART, AO3, and toyhou.se! I do a lot more than just write Warriors, and I'm always happy to chat.

Stay frosty, y'all!!

█ ∘⡊ *:🥀 ˚⊹ reincarneth ; Enoch    

     Hushed sunlight bore through sleeping willows ; pirouetting across porcelain vanity as the common crow bellowed their morning ovation throughout the haunted cemetery.  The chilled morning breeze was soon to wake the beauty ; wine hues fluttering to an open, a taste of vodka left stinging her tongue. --- Raven locks draped over a rusted bench ; desaturated petals tangled at her ends as a languid gaze shifted to the weather-beaten graves covered in overgrown ivy. - A sigh befell roseate tiers ; she had done it again. 

   Sitting herself upright, the woman bent over to pick up the nearly empty liqueur bottle ; brows knitting into a furrow for more reasons than just a brutal hang over. - Was she still a bit drunk? just a bit. ---- Slowly , she blinked the drought from her eyes ; a soft yawn escaping as she nonchalantly removed a small spider from crawling over her shoulder. ( guess it slept with her ) The little arachnid frantically runs circles around a dainty hand before it finds the bench offered ; hiding away till her next visit. -- Now on her own two feet - the mysterious vixen made her way to the graveyard exit ; most people already assuming she was a ghost or something due to her pale complexion & long , long  black hair. Just might as well call her Samara.--- But, no . 

                      This woman is 𝒦𝒶𝓂𝒾𝓀𝑜 𝑀𝒶𝓎𝓊𝓂𝒾 

    Nearly stumbling with each step ; the beauty halted ; heeled boots scraping against chilled concrete before she realized she had ended up in-front of a church. A vexed scoff dripped from matte stained lips & crimson irises soon rolled. --- Faith was a joke. Religion? can fuck right off. ....but as much as she wanted to walk away.. as much as she tried to pull her gaze -- something was keeping her there. something..or rather someone..was calling her.  So, she decided - as a joke, to prove that faith was a sham, she would go in & spill her tragic history. but in all reality,                    --  it was a scream for help. 

    Boots clicked their way in ; daylight spilling into the alters as dust danced withing the warm rays. Upon entering, she saw a priest ; A young looking man with violet eyes  & a face that somehow felt.. welcoming. ---- Immediately drawn to him, she sashays over ; bottle still in hand as her other raised to her chest ; a playfully seductive expression playing across her features as she stands before him.

  “ 𝐅𝐨𝐫𝐠𝐢𝐯𝐞 𝐦𝐞 𝐟𝐚𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫.. 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐈 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐬𝐢𝐧𝐧𝐞𝐝  !  ”                                                                                               Her silken voice rang through the church ; a sexual tone lacing her statement.

50 (25?) sentences prompt meme (part 1(?))

Look at who decided to to this instead of working on the Zelink Week one, haha. Kinda inspired by @the-musical-cc‘s own. So far, it’s only half of it (too tired to finish the rest right now), but...

1. Different (SS)

Normally, she'd give him a quick peck on the cheek as a means of getting him all flustered; but this one... he didn't know quite how to put it, but it felt... different... romantic, even...

2. Hair (BotW)

Her hair, golden as the new sun, framed her tired, yet smiling face.

3. Cheat (SSB Modern!AU)

'Oh, come on, that last move was so cheap!' Zelda jokingly nudged Link, 'even Ganondorf couldn've managed that! And don't pull a John on me there, sweetie!'

4. Nickname (BotW)

In his defence, he HAD been asleep for a century and a bit, but that didn't stop Zelda calling Link "sleepyhead"; not that he minded, though.

5. Lips (SSB)

The first time he and Zelda kissed, Mario did ask him if her lips tasted like 'honey and rose petals'.

6. Question (Sky!Zelink)

No doubt Zelda had been waiting for this day since childhood, but when Link finally asked, she repiled with a jubilated 'yes!', weeping with happiness.

7. Happiness (SSB)

‘Don’t lie to me,’ Peach giggled, ‘I’ve seen how giddy you get whenever he smiles at you.’

8. Melody (OoT)

Part of him hoped that, whenever he played her lullaby, she was out there, somewhere, listening to her melody play out into the night sky.

9. Camera (SSB)

Zelda thought she could her Peach yell out ‘get a camera!’ as she kissed Link for the first time.

10. Temper (BotW)

‘Y-you’re kinda… uh… cute… when you’re angry…?’ Link fumbled, as Zelda side-eyed him for taking the last honey candy.

11. Melting (SSB)

Hot days like these in the World of Trophies, all they’d want to do was to melt into each others’ arms.

12. Falling (SS)

He reached out his arm to grab her, but to no avail, as she plunged into the white depths below.

13. Feathers (WW)

Tetra did wonder if Link hadn’t spent his time collecting golden feathers, he’d been quicker to save her from Ganondorf’s clutches.

14. Flight (BotW)

Call it trite, but whenever she and Link kiss, it feels as if she’s flying.

15. Thoughts (OoT)

Link thought of her every day he’d been away from Hyrule, her smile, the way she laughed…

16. Necklace (BotW)

‘Here,’ he said, presenting her with an ornate, sapphire necklace, ‘from what I remember, this is the traditional stone the Zora use when they propose to the one they love.’

17. Desperation (BotW)

‘No!’ she screamed, not willing to let another loved one die.

18. Jealous (HW)

‘I’ll admit,’ Zelda sighed, exhausted from that little battle in the courtyard, ‘I’m a little jealous of your skill in combat,’ touching the tip of his nose coyly.

19. Slap (WW)

‘Zelda!’ Link yelled as Ganondorf slapped her to one side.

20. Revenge (SSB)

‘Hey!’ Link cried in-between fits of laughter as she ticked him, ‘I’m gonna get you back for that-!’

21. Bet (HW)

‘Are you challenging me, Hero of Hyrule?’ Zelda said, unsheathing her rapier.

22. Eyes (BotW)

His eyes are… well, she doesn’t know how to describe them without being trite, but, a blue, as if a deep azure.

23. Silence (OoT)

In the still of the night, Sheik believed she could hear her lullaby out in the distance…

24. Doubts (SS)

If there were any doubts to their new relationship, Groose seemed a little… disappointed that she’d chosen that “weakling” over him.

25. Thankful (SSB)

Let’s just say Link was thankful Zelda saved him right before Ganondorf had the chance to beat him into the ground.

What do you think of Midna? And what about the other girls who are shipped with Link? Also, what got you into Zelink? (Sorry if you answered any of these before)

Hey it’s totally okay, anonymous friend. I never mind reanswering a question. 

But man, I can never make up my mind about Midna. Like I love her in theory as the outcast princess of the Twili, but then she’s so (I hate to say it) bitchy sometimes, and I, personally, can’t stand people like that. But Midna is like super cool and kind of a badass, yet completely unhelpful as a companion, like all she does is sass you. Granted I haven’t play Twilight Princess in a while, so I’m probably over-exaggerating, but I played Twilight Princess for the first time after I finished Skyward Sword, where Fi was the most overly helpful companion you could ever want, and then I got Midna as a companion, and she was always ‘I don’t know, figure it out yourself.’ But like she has an actual personality that isn’t ‘I’m so helpless please save me,’ and I’m also like ‘that’s so great!’ at the same time.So tl;dr: I don’t really like Midna because of her personality, but I respect her as a character for her non-cookie-cutter conformity and the strength of her personality (even though I don’t like it).

Now my opinion of other girls that are shipped with Link. I mean, I’m not a hateful shipper; I respect all ships and shippers. So I don’t really have much of an opinion about most other ships besides Zelink. I mean, I also ship Malink cuz I don’t think OoT Link and Zelda get together, but that’s kind of on the down low for me. I just see Midna and Link as friends, but if you ship that, you know, that’s cool. That’s kinda my opinion on all other ships really. I just see them as friends with Link, and I don’t hate or judge those who think otherwise. :)

Now the amazing masterpiece that is Skyward Sword got me into Zelink cuz there is so much adorable Zelink in that game, and it was my first Zelda game, and I fell in love!!! *showers rose petals and love for everyone* I fell down a rabbit hole of Zelink, and I’m never going back!!!

“Pretty Little Liars” S7 Ep16 Recap: Driving Miss Crazy

Previously on Pretty Little Liars, Emison declared themselves endgame, Aria joined the dark side, and Spencer was sassy AF in her police interrogation. We open with Ezria in a dance class, practicing their mambo and getting ready for their wedding dance. Ezra is feeling his grooves, but Aria is still haunted by her dastardly deeds. Evil Aria facetimes her and demands she do one more job before getting her file back. Why so desperate? The file contains a police report that Aria filled out but never filed, where she calls Ezra a predator and a criminal (girl, you’re not wrong). Evil Aria tells her that she either do the job or send Ezra to jail. Doesn’t seem like much of a choice to me, TBH.  A unity candle? And a Shel Silverstein poem? Sure brah, whatever.   Det. Marco drops in on Hanna and Caleb at the loft, where he questions them about the Radley receipt flood. We also find out that Caleb lives full time at the hotel, like he’s Eloise or something. That’s a pretty big step up from the air ducts at Rosewood High. When Marco finds out that Caleb built the Radley security system, Team Haleb finds themselves at the top of the suspect list. Meanwhile at Casa Hastings, the family is packing up boxes and getting ready to move to Harrisburg. Alison is OOT visiting Jason, who has yet to show his fake head in Rosewood since he banged Hanna’s mom. And Aria. That boy gets around. Spencer finds her old Radley baby blanket in a giveaway box, and wants to keep it. She should give it to Hanna, who can surely turn it into a stylish scarf or wrap dress. I thought Emily’s shirt said “porn, porn,porn.” I wish it did.   Hanna, freaked out after Marco’s drop in, assembles the Liars to play the board game. Mona shows up, and the Liars take umbrage with her inclusion, as if she hasn’t already saved their asses a million times. Look, I get it— Mona was formerly A, but she has had quite the redemption arc. She siphoned blood out of her tiny arms to help Hanna, she was locked in the dollhouse and forced to dress as Alison, and she replaced the windshield on Lucas’s car. She is a literal hyperadrenalized genius. Take the help, dummies! Mona of House Vanderwaal, First of her Name, Breaker of Bitches, Queen of Rosewood and the First Girls, Khaleesi of the Great Grassy Woods outside Rosewood.   Caleb goes back to Radley where he runs into Ashley Marin, who is sporting the sharpest and sleekest of bobs. She asks him what is up with the cops and the flooding, and he lies about knowing anything. My concerns are just as severe as my shoulder bob!   Spencer and her mom continue to pack up boxes, when Aria swings by with dinner. While she’s there, Aria pairs a burner phone with the house speaker system and stashes it in one of the boxes, then runs out of there like her hair is on fire. As soon as she’s gone, an audio file starts playing in every room of the house: it’s Mary Drake and Peter Hastings fighting over Jessica’s dead body…literally. Mary talks about Peter and Jessica planning to kill her, while the real Peter Hastings tries to smash every speaker he sees. During his mantrum, Veronica wants to call the police, but Spencer and Peter urge her not to. CURSE YOU ALEXA, YOU’VE FOILED MY PLANS FOR THE LAST TIME!   Meanwhile, Emily sweet talks Ali on the phone and reminds her to take her vitamins, while Mona yells at her not to forget her folic acid. Emily softly whispers “me too” into the phone, and Mona assures her that Emison is hardly a secret— she’s known they were in lurve since grade school. Mona has tracked down the fertility doc who inseminated Alison, and makes an appointment for her and Emily to go undercover as a lesbian couple who want a baby. She also tells Emily to “dress accordingly” which I guess means she wants Emily to fancy it up. Emily’s beautiful face is so confused and I love it. But I don’t have a black tie track suit!   In the next scene, they’re holding hands and sharing their love story with the fertility doc, Dr. Hamlin. Emily is wearing a stylish suit and looks increasingly uncomfortable—girl, you’re a lesbian going undercover as a lesbian…get it together! Mona tells the doc they were referred by Alison Rollins and the doc gets scared.  We would like the stylish femme discount please!   He asks them to leave, but before they go Mona swipes a magazine and peels off the doc’s home address for deeper sleuthing. This bitch is playing 3-D chess while the Liars can barely manage Hungry, Hungry Hippos.  Monily: the ship we never knew we always needed.   An increasingly panicked Hanna realizes that her fingerprints are all over the shovels they used to bury Archer, so she heads to the woods to steal them. Unfortunately, the park ranger on duty tells her that the shovels are already gone, and she’ll have to use a beer mug (JK, but can you imagine?). Spencer finds the burner phone of doom and tells Aria that she thinks Mary Drake planted it. She doesn’t know whether to trust Mary, and Aria tells her to let Mona work her magic. Spencer continues to be anti-Mona, and we all know why: Spencer likes to be the brains of the operations, the one in charge, but even her mighty Hastings mind is no match for the sheer genius of the Vanderwaal. Aria continues her guilt spiral and has no time for Ezra, who wants to pick first dance songs and decide which flower petals more accurately tell their love story. Ezra, assuming Aria’s concerns are all about him, tells her that she needs to get over their sordid past and trust him again. You know, just get over that whole thing where he knowingly slept with underage girls and then spied on them to write a book. Aria is NOT feeling it. I’ve made a HUGE mistake.   Spencer walks outside to find Marco waiting for her. He tries to get the truth from her and demand to know if she had real feels for him or just wanted a cop in her corner. She tells him that if he wants to talk, he can drag her ass down to the station and humiliate himself. I love cold as ice Spencer. She gets into her car, and Mary pops up from the backseat, covers her mouth, and tells her to drive. You know, mom things. Spencer drives them to the Lost Woods resort, where Mary tells her that she didn’t plant the burner phone. She admits to doing bad things, and we get a flashback to 6 years ago: Mary and Peter are arguing in the Hastings house, because Mary wants to have a relationship with Spencer. Peter calls her conniving and assures her she’ll never know Spencer. Then, Jessica walks in and demands to know why Mary is still there.  I really want to trust you, but you HAVE to stop liking everything on my Facebook page. It’s embarrassing.   Apparently, Jessica and Peter conspired to kill Mary with Peter’s heart pills, but Mary intercepted them and poisoned Jessica, then buried her in the backyard. Not only did Mary save her own life, but she killed the sister who falsely imprisoned her in Radley and stole her first born. She tells Spencer that she wants a real relationship with her, and asks her to run away together. After all, they’re both wanted by the cops…it can be a mother-daughter bonding trip off the grid! Caleb and Hanna invite Ashley over for dinner, but Ashley is still worried about the cops and convinced that her daughter is in trouble again. She asks Caleb for the truth, and Caleb tells her that he’s in love with Hanna and wants to marry her. This is the first Hanna is hearing of this, but she’s on board, so they all pop open some wine and toast the engagement. They had it coming, they had it coming, they only have themselves to blame!   Aria wakes up in a black and white world, dressed like a bride. She’s on a set designed like a cell block, and is shocked to see Mona, dressed as a prison guard, singing “Jailhouse Rock” while a bunch of convicts perform a choreographed beat down of Ezra. It is, in a word, marvelous. It’s fan service come to life. It’s sunshine, lollipops, and rainbows. Aria and a bloodied Ezra make their way to the altar, where Veronica Hastings is wearing a prison jump suit. She calls Aria a selfish little bitch and tells her she wouldn’t piss on her if she were on fire. Aria wakes with a start— it was all a musical fever dream! I’m now inspired to start a kickstarter for my musical stage adaptation of Pretty Little Liars. She gets a text from A.D. telling her that her reward is in the Brew.  If you had been there, if you had seen it, I betcha you would have done the same!   Aria searches the Brew for her file, looking in every book, vintage typewriter, and sugar packet. She finds an envelope under a chair containing a puzzle piece, then pops up her head to see Mona watching her. Aria quickly dons her black hoodie and hustles off to put the pieces of the puzzle together. Later, Emily and Mona bust into the doctor’s office with his mail, which reveals he recently paid off his student loans. They demand to know who bankrolled him, and he tells them he never got a name, just a donor ID number. Spencer walks in on her parents reading the Mary Drake letter. Peter is convinced that Mary is an evil lunatic who wants to steal Spencer away, but Veronica is more level headed and sympathetic. Peter also has the AUDACITY to tell Spencer that she would have done the same thing if a crazy person was threatening her family, like he doesn’t know she was stalked for years and locked in a freaking dollhouse prison. He leaves, and Veronica tells Spencer she can start unpacking: with all the scandal surrounding them, Veronica is withdrawing from the senate and giving up her seat. Yet another capable woman whose political aspirations were foiled by shitty men who couldn’t keep it in their pants. You don’t know what it’s like to be terrorized for years by a madman who blackmails you and torments your friends and family! Brah, what show are you even on right now?   Hanna and Caleb meet up in a tent in the woods, where Caleb has gone off grid. Hanna questions him about the proposal, and Caleb tells her he wants to get married ASAP. They pop some champagne, swap cigar roll rings, and have throwback sex in the tent. Spencer meets up with Mary at the Lost Woods and tells her that she can’t run away with her. Spencer really wants to go, and she wants to know Mary, but she can’t leave her friends and family behind, especially her mother. Mary is sad but understands, and asks for her forgiveness. Spencer forgives her, and tells her she needs to forgive herself. Aria pops the puzzle piece into the board game, and gets a message telling her to turn around, where she finds her file stuck in a decorative vase. Okay, it’s a procedural series starring us as crime fighting lesbians, I’m the brawn, you’re the brains. Did you drive all the way over here just to pitch me Rizzoli and Isles!?   Emily catches Mona outside her apartment and wants to talk about their next steps, but Mona blows her off and tells her to come back in the morning. Mona locks all three locks on her door and spies Emily leave through the peep hole. She then retires to her mini-lair, where she has photos, blueprints, and maps on the wall. Oh, and those shovels in the corner. Only three episodes left for Mona to crack the case! Because at this point, no one else is going to get it done. Tweet me your episode feels and predictions at @ChelseaProcrast http://dlvr.it/PKjq52