#organs in and not being able to clear my lungs re:stitches and will just like drown in my sleep or whatever and i cant even bring myself to
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#i truly wish my piece of shit father would die like. he went out and got some mystery flu like illness and is going around the house hacking#up shit from his throat and spitting it and blowing his nose on towels and shit and touching every surface and handle and not washing his#hands and lowkey like. me catching something like this after my surgery could get really bad really fast because of my stitches holding my#organs in and not being able to clear my lungs re:stitches and will just like drown in my sleep or whatever and i cant even bring myself to#be upset because he is an antivaxer who did this shit all pandemic long and ive just always assumed there's the possibility that i could#die just from him being the biggest most narcissistic inconsiderate piece of shit he can possibly be and like made my peace with it#like yeah i guess i might die from having a piece of shit father who dosent care if i live or die#god i wish i wasnt trapped here and could go back to my apartment but i still struggle with literally everything 😭😭😭#lowkey want to die in my sleep i hate this fucking shithole place so much
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