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soundcrusher · 2 years

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Lightlost knows best

Everyone, part 2 of season 3 from my ongoing story set in the sentient sg/Lost Light au from @cuppajj i out!

I hope all of you will enjoy this part just as much as I did. (Also, I'm gonna admit it, I missed writing sg/ll. I really did.)

Trigger Warning: none

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Sometimes Tankcrusher wondered where in life she made a wrong turn. Was it, when she joined the Decepticons? Was it when she got together with Thrillchaser? Her friends did say that she should have chosen a grounder as her partner. But with her look, the grounder would have been a speedster and then Phoenix would have looked more like the mech she was currently holding down.

Maybe the wrong turn was, when she decided to let the prime stay with them and give him the job in her bakery. If she didn’t, then she wouldn’t have to sit at the medic’s office with Rodimus in her lap, while pinning his arms to the side and making sure he wouldn’t kick or bite the poor doctor trying to see if everything was okay with him. Or maybe the wrong turn was taking Rodimus to the doctor in the first place. From what she could see, he looked fine, but her “Mama Bear Programming”, as Thrillchaser would have called it, just reared its head and made her worry, even if there was nothing to worry about.

“Roddy, by the love of Primus, could you just calm down? The doctor won’t do anything. Not as long as I am here with you.” Whispered the femme quietly, while the doctor had his back turned to them. “The longer you keep thrashing around, the longer we will have to stay here.” Tankcrusher only meant well, when she said that, but the look she got from Rodimus made her second guess her choice of words. He looked almost scared, as if he was expecting the doctor to pull out some kind of torture device annd use it on him, no matter if there was a second in the room or not.

Maybe that’s why Tankcrusher let out a long sigh, before she asked the doctor if he could go out for a moment while she talked with her son. And considering how relieved the mech looked as he heard that he could walk out, it wasn’t surprising to her how fast the good doctor was out of the room. “Alright…” Said the femme as she grabbed Rodimus and sat him down next to her. Keeping an optic on every possible exit way imaginable. And yes, that also involved the windows and vents. After all, if Phoenix was bold enough to escape the doctor by jumping out of a window, then she was sure Rodimus would do the same. Sometimes, the resemblance the two shared was uncanny. And Tankcrusher didn’t just mean their looks. “You’re acting like Phoenix whenever I had to bring him here, until he made up his mind to become a medic. I thought you were a grown mech, and not some little sparkling scared of the good old doctor.” Joked the femme, which oonly got a scoff from Rodimus as a reaction.

“I’m not a sparkling…” Muttered the prime, after crossing his arms over his chest and looking down at the floor. The pattern down there was, after all, quite interesting. “But if you want to know, I just don’t like medics. Never have, never will. End of story.”

“But it doesn’t sound like the end.” Was all she said, as she placed a servo onto Rodimus’ shoulder. Giving him a comforting squeeze. “It sounds more like you want to say something, but you’re too scared because saying it would only make you realize that it’s true. That it’s part of your past and… you’re too scared to admit it, because then it would feel like you’re admitting that it is true.” Tankcrusher gave Rodimus one more squeeze, before putting her servo back in her lap. Watching the prime’s mind work on what she’s said and how it could relate to him.

“And how would you know that?” Asked Rodimus, after a short moment of silence. To which the taller femme only laughed. “I do have a conjux who left me and my son after all. I know how it feels to pretend that something isn’t true, but… no matter how much you pretend, in your spark you know that it’s true. That the lie you’re telling yourself is only going to distract you from reality for so long. And then, you find yourself fearing that admitting to the truth is only going to break you further. But it’s not… because you have something or someone to live for.”

Rodimus scoffed at that. “Sounds like your conjux was an idiot for leaving you and Phoenix.”

“Well, Thrillchaser has always been an idiot, but that’s why I took him as my conjux. He was… different from the other mechs. Taking me as I am and never complaining when I loomed over him or pinned him against a wall and-” Rodimus didn’t want to hear more. No, this was too much information the mother of his adopted little brother was giving out. So, he quickly covered her mouth, before stopping out for a moment.

Tankcrusher has a conjux, and the conjux name is Thrillchaser. And Rodimus knows a mech named Thrillchaser who, for some reason, was always looking at Phoenix whenever he would pass the youngling in the halls of the Lost Light.

And then there were the times he would spot Thrillchaser when they were on other planets…

Does this mean Lightlost somehow managed to hunt Phoenix’s father down and torture him? But for what reason? Revenge on the behalf of another? Rodimus wasn’t sure if that sounded right. Not when both Phoenix and Tankcrusher sounded like they accepted that Thrillchaser wasn’t part of their family. Then again, the Lost Light was someone who was full of surprises. Maybe they had an ulterior motive behind it? Or maybe they simply wanted to have something to do? The thought alone made Rodimus shudder and fear for what they had planned next.

“Hey, me talking about the things I loved to do with my conjux are no reasons to shudder.” Chuckled Tankcrusher, as she softly took Rodimus’ servos into her own and pulled them away from her mouth. Smiling warmly down at the prime, before smirking. “But if you want something to shudder about, I could talk about that one time we went to that nice drive in theater and scared a bunch of organics.”

“Primus no! Bessie, please, don’t! I will let the doctor examine me, if you don't start talking about what you did in that theater!”

Tankcrusher could only laugh, as she saw the comically wide eyes and panicked expression of Rodimus. If those opposing him could see him now, they would surely laugh at his expense. Although, she soon enough stopped, before softly patting the prime’s helm. This was the first time he called her ‘Bessie’. A name only those part of the family were allowed to use. “Alright, alright. I will stop, if you promise not to bite the good doctor when he gets too close to your face.”

“Tch. I can’t promise you anything.

After the examination was over, and the doctor didn’t lose a digit, both Tankcrusher and Rodimus made their way back towards the bakery. And while the femme told the speedsteer about the time she finally admitted that Thrillchaser wasn’t coming back, the prime slowly opened up about the things that happened to him. He didn’t tell her anything, but he somewhat explained why he reacted the way he did when she first took a look at him and why he nearly bit off the doctor digit, when he got too close. Earning a sympathetic look from the taller femme, before she commented on how she would love to meet this ‘Lightlost’ to give them her own two cents on the matter. To which Rodimus was quick to say “NO!” Letting her know that he wasn’t on board with her trying to fight Lightlost. Not when Phoenix seemed to still be attached to them.

While Rodimus and Tankcrusher had their small ‘adventure’, Phoenix was making sure everything was running smoothly at the bakery. Serving every customer to the best of his abilities, before going back into the kitchen to make another batch of cookies. Even Dominus helped out by delivering orders in a small basket to either the tables outside the bakery or to the nearby homes. Leaving Phoenix alone then and there, but only after the youngling reassured the turbofox that he would be alright. There was no Cybertronian who could come into the back of the bakery without him noticing after all. But then again, Lightlost wasn’t any other Cybertronian. So, Phoenix didn’t notice them, when they entered the bakery and walked straight into the kitchen. Only a small chuckle from the holo-avatar alerted the youngling to their presence, but by then, Lightlost had already placed their servos onto Phoenix’s shoulders. Pressing slightly down, which caused the youngling to supcounsicly make himself smaller while his wings went down in fear. Giving Lightlost even more leeway to loom over the already frightened youngspark and only adding more to his rising stress levels

“Hello there Phoenix.” Said Lightlost softly, as to not startle their little bird any further. But they couldn’t help the gleeful smile forming as they saw how the youngling tensed after hearing his name from them. Looks like their little ‘field trip’ hasn’t erased the memories of his correction. Good, no, perfect. It means that Lightlost still had something to work with and reassured them that Phoenix knew his place. “Do you know how worried I was after the captain and you left me? After you decided to leave me behind? What if something would have happened to you? I couldn’t live with myself, if someone dared to hurt the both of you.” They said, while moving their servos to slowly turn Phoenix around and hug him tightly. Softly patting his helm, while making sure he couldn’t escape the hug. “And just look at the mess you got yourself into, little bird. Do you really think anyone is happy with having you back on Cybertron? I’m sure that there are many who want you gone again. The looks of your customers sure enough prove it.” Lightlost said, as they smiled down at the youngling in their arms. “How about you come with me? I know what’s best for you after all.”

Phoenix didn’t know what came over him. Yes, he was confused. Oh so confused, because he still saw Lightlost as a parent, but at the same time, he couldn’t forget what they had made him go through. But at the same time, he suddenly didn’t feel scared, like he should be. He felt something else. An emotion he couldn’t place. Maybe it was confidence? Or maybe the fear made him go mad, because Phoenix took all his strength together and pushed Lightlost away from him. “NO!” If they thought they could come and take him back, they thought wrong. Phoenix won’t go back, not when he finally was with his mother again.

Although, the little act of rebellion coming from Phoenix didn’t seem to make them happy. No, Lightlost looked unhappy, maybe even angry. And seeing that, made Phoenix shrink back in fear.

“No?” Asked Lightlost. “Oh, I see how it is.” They said as they took one step back, but never leaving Phoenix a chance to run from them. “Oh Phoenix, Phoenix, Phoenix. Haven’t we had this talk before? Just because you think you’re so mature now, doesn’t mean that you know everything. But if you think you’re such a grown up mech, then go ahead. Walk out there and have a talk with them, without this!” Phoenix’s optics widened as he saw Lightlost pull out his old visor. The visor that was taken from him the first time he boarded the Lost Light and one of the only things that has given him some sort of safety from his old crew. “H-how?” Was all the youngling could stutter.

“Do you really think they would tolerate you otherwise? Do you think they would talk with you, if you weren’t wearing this? I have seen their looks, Phoenix. How they stare at you. How they silently judge you. But if you truly feel like you’re more accepted by them than by me, then go ahead. Go out there and see how they treat you. But should you realize that they don’t accept you the way I have, then I won’t say I told you so.” Lightlost said, as they placed the visor into Phoenix’s shaking servos. Watching as the youngling’s optics filled with tears, while he clutched the visor close to his chest.

And that’s the moment Lightlost decided to leave. Not only because they could see that they managed to do the first step of their plan, but also because the turbofox was returning. And they didn’t want him, nor Rodimus and Tankcrusher to know they were here. Not yet.

“But if you truly believe that you can live amongst them, put them to the test, Phoenix. But don’t come crying to me, when my words come true.”

“After all, I know what’s best for you.”

#sentient sg/lost light au #sentient sg/lost light #phoenix #sg/rodimus #tankcrusher #only phoenix and tankcrusher are my ccharacters #shattered glass #well... this is part 2 from season 3 I guess #how's that for a 'mother knows best' reference?#well; I referenced the reprise #hope this still makes you happy cuppajj

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