#of my f/os. bc he's usually fucking around towards the front taking care of me all day. but that has its trials and tribulations too. guy
Text
ya know what. sometimes i feel guilty for needing my f/os to feel at all safe and secure and happy and loved and good enough and content etc etc in my life :(
#like i'm Not a big tough guy.#i'm just not. i'm a sickly little guy. like literally i'm super fucking sick all the time...#and i like rely on them so much mentally. ya know. i can't sleep without them bc i'm so scared of sleep and sleeping and the dark and#being alone. i hate being alone so much. it makes having alters of at least one (don't ask unless we're Actually friends)#of my f/os. bc he's usually fucking around towards the front taking care of me all day. but that has its trials and tribulations too. guy#in my head is always there (/pos and /neg. we have multitudes.)#and idk. i feel. invalidated in my masculinity *balloon deflating soundbite* bc of it ngl. that i'm the weak feminine one in every#relationship i'm in. that's some shit i gotta sort through myself. internalized toxic masculinity and transphobia.#bc it indicates nothing of who i actually am and how my relationships actually work. i'm just a feminine guy ya know.#and i see things all the time that are like (not vague bc i couldn't name names if i tried) 'all these femme shippers are detracting from#the masc shippers by being all frail and petite and feminine and reliant on their f/os!!!' as if being frail and petite and feminine and#reliant is the problem and not the sheer amount of attention more femme aligned shippers get over masc shippers in the community.#like men can be frail and petite and reliant and cry cry cry and yell and gush 24/7 about their f/os and still be masc.#the problem is when we discuss self shippers at large we usually picture a much more cishet white female crowd than what actually exists#bc those kinds of people tend to get more attention.#i'm sure there's a lot to unpack there about what makes them popular but i would prefer not to see posts that shit on#people for being frail and emotional and dependent. bc i am those things and i'm a man who is those things g-ddamnit.#i've only seen like maybe three or four posts like that but c'mon....#ellie rambles about stuff#/vent
1 note
·
View note
Last Seen Blogs
happyhill-photograph
幸せの丘
hhp88633
成都楼凤 成都兼职 成都修车 成都交友
ghostclans-bane
Stars rest your soul..
plptrm
depresso Expresso
koffeewitch
Pink Koffee Witch