So I finished 1670 like 10 minutes ago…

PRINCE GARY – ONE YEAR IN 

In very personal interview, Prince Gary of Sweden talks about his marriage to Crown Princess Tilde and his first year as part of the Swedish Royal Family, and opens up about how tailoring made him into the man he is today.

 It’s drizzling as the car stops at the gates of Haga Castle outside Stockholm. The gates open automatically – registration plate recognition, my drive tells me. I still have to be checked off on a list before we continue the short distance from the gate to the castle. 

The castle is small, as far as castles go, 43 rooms laid out over 1550 square meters. It’s also fairly new, again as far as castles go, built in the early 19th century. It was originally built as a summer residence, but has off and on been used as a permanent home for princes and princesses of Sweden. Currently, it’s the home of Crown Princess Tilde and her husband Prince Gary, who I’m here to meet. 

Walking up the stairs to the front door, I’m nervous. I’ve never been in a castle as anything other than a tourist before. I’ve never met any royals before. I’m not even sure where I stand on the concept of monarchies in today’s society. 

It’s Prince Gary who opens the door, which throws me off right way. I’ve watched Downton Abbey, and that’s what I was expecting. Sort of. I tell Prince Gary the same. He laughs and says that as far has he knows, there are no dead Turks in the bedroom. I’m glad to hear. 

He asks me to remove my shoes. The Crown Princess is in Gothenburg this week, but she’ll still have his head if she finds out he let someone walk in with rain on their shoes. Luckily, I was prepared for this and picked out a new pair of socks this morning. Prince Gary smiles when he talks about his wife, this time and throughout our entire meeting. 

‘I still have to pinch myself sometimes,’ he says in regards to how he’s ended up where he is. ‘I still expect to wake up in London every morning.’ 

Prince Gary offers me coffee – ‘Or tea. I have pretended to teach these Vikings how to make proper tea. Not that I ever knew how to.’ – and we make a detour to a small kitchenette on the ground floor. It was installed by the Crown Princess Tilde’s aunt, Princess Catarina, who was the last permanent resident at Haga Castle, Prince Gary tells me. Apparently, Princess Catarina liked to make her own snacks and found the way to the kitchen too long. Prince Gary is full of anecdotes like that. 

‘I’ve been studying,’ he says, laughing, when I point out how much random information he has about the family he’s married into. 

When we have our coffee – and cinnamon buns Prince Gary swears he hasn’t made himself – we move to a study for the interview. The room has huge windows, bookshelves at the back wall, a small writing desk that seems old enough to have come with the castle. There is a cream sofa, stylish coffee tables, and comfortable armchairs. There is a fireplace and a huge chandelier. It’s a perfect mix of old and new. I feel out of place and at home at the same time. It’s a very odd feeling, but I’m suddenly happy that I was told to take off my wet shoes – the rug is a wedding gift from Queen Elizabeth II to the Swedish King and Queen. (Again, one of Prince Gary’s many titbits of information that he just shares of the top of his head.)

This is a bit of a fairy tale story: peasant girl marrying the handsome prince, and I know that at the time of your wedding there was a lot of focus on your background and so on… Now, a year later, how do you think your image has change?

I think people in general have come to terms with me here. I’m pretty sure I’m not the ‘end of the Swedish monarchy’ or whatever it was one historian called me when the engagement was announced. The Swedish media, luckily, isn’t the British media – no offense – and they’ve been keeping a polite distance. It’s helped, I suppose, that I haven’t messed up publicly yet. I’ve learned how to wave.

How very Queen Elizabeth of you.

I’ve been practicing in front of the mirror.

Really?

Really. I watched The Crown – you know, the Netflix show – because I thought I could get some pointers on how to do this from Prince Philip. Then I called up Claire Foy, to see if she had any tips on how to learn these things as an adult. I realise both these things sound ridiculous now that I say it out loud.

Prince Gary goes into a long explanation about all the different things he had to learn before marrying into the Swedish royal family. General history, the royal linage, prime ministers through the years, politics, food culture. Altogether, he estimates that he has enough to get a bachelor’s degree in Swedish history and social studies. He seems to have taken it all to heart. I get the feeling that he takes pride in learning and knowing this. Unlike what a lot of the media would like to have you believe, Prince Gary isn’t unintelligent.

Before you married, you worked as a tailor. Is that something you miss? Is it something you still do?

I was an apprentice, not an actual tailor. I never completed my training. This sort of… came in the way of that. Sometimes I feel sad about it, tailoring is what saved me. More or less. I owe the tailors at Kingman my life. They gave me so much, and I can’t ever truly repay them for seeing something in the little shit I was back then, and think ‘that’s a young man with potential.’ I don’t even have words for it. I don’t miss the actual tailoring that much, though I’m planning on finishing the apprenticeship if it’s at all possible, but I miss my friends. It is different to go from see someone every day to speak to them perhaps once a week. That goes for all my friends, just not the tailors at Kingsman.

How is it, then, being a fulltime prince?

Fulltime prince? Yes, I suppose I am. I don’t go around cutting ribbons every day, or anything, but there are so many things underneath it all that no one really sees.

So not just parties on luxury boats?

Who would have thought?

Instead you spend your time go to an outreach program for young men. Tell me about that.

That is a big part of it, yes. Or I’m hoping that it will take up a big part of my time, eventually. It’s on a very small scale so far, and I’ve been very conflicted about it for a long time. Not the project itself, but the concept of it all. It feels like an outdated cliché, royals picking a cause to become the champion for and devote all their time to. Or so it felt before when I heard, for example, Prince William, talk about mental health issues. ‘What does he know about mental health?’ the cynical street kid in me thought. Still thinks, sometimes. Don’t get me wrong, I believe he’s genuine about it. I’m sure he’s committed. It’s just… hard to reach the other side sometimes, especially when you come from the most privilege class of them all. It’s easy for it to feel fake or cheap.

It’s also really hard to accept that outreached hand. Even more so if someone is reaching down to you. Pride, it’s a stupid thing sometimes. I grew up poor, with an alcoholic, abusive stepfather. I had a criminal record. It was pure luck and desperation that made me take the hand someone reached out to me.

So I’m trying to be that hand now, and I’m trying to find other people to be that hand. I do my best. I have no idea how to succeed. There is a huge social-economic segregation in Sweden, especially in the suburbs to the larger cities, just like in the UK.

You have also a held lecture about new forms of masculinity.

Lectures. Plural. I have no idea how any of that happened. I was approached by a gender studies professor at Lund University and now I think I have been to every Swedish university with a gender studies course. In October I’m going to Oslo to do it again. It’s fun. I had never set my foot at a university before.

And what do you talk about?

How it is to be the husband of one of Sweden’s most visible and well-liked women. She’s never going to be my wife, I’m always going to be her husband. You said yourself in the beginning of this interview that I’m the peasant girl marrying up, after all. I’m totally fine with that. On top of that, I’m a tailor and a former gymnast. Nothing about me screams alpha male. If I can show that that’s okay, then I’ve come a long way. Young men need other types of role models. Not that I claim to be anyone’s role model, but at least I’m putting an alternative out there.

So, how is it to be the husband of one of Sweden’s most visible and well-liked women?

I think the marriage itself is pretty standard. None of my friends believe me when I say we fight about socks on the floor and unchanged toilet paper rolls as well. Then my wife has a weird job that she’s had since she was born, and the only way for her to get a promotion is for her father to die. At first, I was afraid, every day, that he would die and throw us into this whole other crazy life – my life has become crazy enough, lately – but that’s no way to live. Tilde has taught me a lot when it comes to this, she’s been living with it her entire life, after all. When it happens, it happens, and hopefully I can be there and support her through that transition, just as she’s supported me through mine.

We talked about earlier about being a fulltime prince, and that’s it really. Supporting my wife in her role as Crown princess, and later Queen, is my most important job, both as a husband and as a prince. The other projects, the talks, everything else, even though it’s important too and I really enjoy it, being there for Tilde so that she can do her job is my first priority.

You said Crown princess Tilde helped you find your place when you came here, any big cultural shocks?

I’m still finding my place to be honest, but I think I’m getting there. The biggest cultural shock of my life, though, was joining Kingsman. They made sure that I knew they saw my value and thanks to that I saw my own value. It turned my entire world upside down, or rather turned it right again. Every person should know their value and that they are valued. Compared to that, getting to be a part of the life of the woman I love is easy.

And I mean, Sweden and the UK are practically the same place. There are little things, like the shoes and what way to look when you cross the street. Oh, and that they drive with the lights on all the time. But no one talks to strangers and they know how to queue. It’s perfect.

Is the Swedish coming along as nicely?

I’ve been learning Swedish since 2014, so I’d like to think I manage okay. I’ve gone my whole life without speaking the Queen’s English, so hopefully I’ll get by even if I never master the Queen’s Swedish.

99 questions I stole somewhere so I could answer them

1: Do you sleep with your closet doors open or closed? I enjoy having them neatly closed, but I always hang clothes and stuff over them, so they end up being open 2: Do you take the shampoos and conditioner bottles from hotel? Sometimes. If they've felt nice when I've used them. 3: Do you sleep with your sheets tucked in or out? Tucked in. 4: Have you ever stolen a street sign before? No, but my dad stole one with a wild boar on it 5: Do you like to use post-it notes?<br> I do, never actually do it though.<br> 6: Do you cut out coupons but then never use them? Yeah.. 7: Would you rather be attacked by a big bear or a swarm of a bees? Swarm of bees? 8: Do you have freckles? I do, but they're mostly visible after I've gotten some sun on my face. 9: Do you always smile for pictures? Very often, but I also do this very stupid thing where I sort of scrunch up my nose and mouth when people take my picture. Don't know why.. 10: What is your biggest pet peeve? Cliché, but chewing with an open mouth. 11: Do you ever count your steps when you walk? Not that I can think of, but I'm easily influenced, so I might start unwillingly now. Thanks. 12: Have you ever peed in the woods? Lol yeah 13: What about pooped in the woods? Lol yeah 14: Do you ever dance even if theres no music playing? Yeah. 15: Do you chew your pens and pencils? No, but I bite my nails when I'm restless 16: How many people have you slept with this week? One 17: What size is your bed? Queen size (?), 160cm 18: What is your Song of the week? Only Angel, by Harry Styles 19: Is it okay for guys to wear pink? Yes. YES. 20: Do you still watch cartoons? Don't really watch tv, so it doesn't happen that often, but when I do I enjoy it. 21: Whats your least favorite movie? I am legend. Fuck that movie. You all know what I mean. 22: Where would you bury hidden treasure if you had some? Somewhere too obvious for people to bother looking there. 23: If you're a girl, bra size? If you're a guy, pants size? Oh, let's see if I can get this right in some sort of international size.. 34DD (75E in Swedish sizes) 24: What do you dip a chicken nugget in? I don't eat chicken nuggets, but I would dip them in ketchup. 25: What is your favorite food? Tacos. End of story. 26: What movies could you watch over and over and still love? Spirit, Hercules.. probably more. I'm very easily entertained by movies. 27: Last person you kissed/kissed you? My boyfriend. 28: Were you ever a boy/girl scout? Nope. 29: Would you ever strip or pose nude in a magazine? Don't like being public, so I wouldn't wanna be in a magazine. I could probably strip in a small club or at a party though. Wouldn't mind that too much. Could be fun. 30: When was the last time you wrote a letter to someone on paper? Wow... eeh.... like 7 years ago when I wrote a letter to future me. 31: Can you change the oil on a car? In theory yes. Never actually done it though. 32: Ever gotten a speeding ticket? Nein. I'm lame in traffic. 33: Ever ran out of gas? No, close though. 34: Favorite kind of sandwich? Tomato, Swedish präst cheese, some salt and pepper on a nice sourdough bread. 35: Best thing to eat for breakfast? I really enjoy oatmeal with fresh blueberries and raspberries, and some cinnamon. 36: What is your usual bedtime? Depends on if I have work the day after. If I do, I try to be asleep by like 11pm. If I don't, I usually go to sleep at like 1am or something like that. 37: Are you lazy? Yeah.. 38: When you were a kid, what did you dress up as for Halloween? Didn't really dress up that much for halloween. Live in a tiny village, so there weren't really that many opportunities. 39: What is your Chinese astrological sign? Rat I think..? 40: Are you horny? Man, most of the time yeah. 41: Do you have any magazine subscriptions? No I don't, had one when I was like ten. 42: Which are better legos or lincoln logs? Legos of course. What even are Lincoln logs? 43: Are you stubborn? I can be... but like in a low-key way. 44: Who is better...Leno or Letterman? Those names don't ring a bell, really... so I don't know 45: Ever watch soap operas? Not my thing really. 46: Are you afraid of heights? If I'm standing on a high edge, I am, but not otherwise. 47: Do you sing in the car? Lol yeah... too much and too loud. I think people on the streets can hear me go. 48: Do you sing in the shower? No, for some reason I don't really do that? 49: Do you dance in the car? Yeah 50: Ever used a gun? I've used an air rifle, but that's about it. Doesn't really count maybe? 51: Last time you got a portrait taken by a photographer? Uhhh...? Like... three and a half years ago for picture day? 52: Do you think musicals are cheesy? Yeah. They are. Love them though. 53: Is Christmas stressful? Can be. Especially when I've postponed Christmas gift shopping. 54: Ever eat a pierogi? Yeah man, made 'em myself many times. 55: Favorite type of fruit pie? Blueberry or rhubarb 56: Occupations you wanted to be when you were a kid? Okey. So... I wanted to be a ballerina that danced around in a flower shop. No lie. 57: Do you believe in ghosts? Don't know if I believe in ghosts, per se, but I think it seems fishy that death is just nothing? You know? 58: Ever have a Deja-vu feeling? Too many times, man. 59: Take a vitamin daily? I try to take vitamin D sort of daily in the winter, to sort of compensate for the lack of sun we have here in the north during winter. 60: Wear slippers? When I'm somewhere sunny on vacation. 61: Wear a bath robe? When I borrow my boyfriend's to run to the bathroom at night. 62: What do you wear to bed? Nothing. Everyone should. 63: First concert? I think it was Amy Diamond, this really young, Swedish sweetheart that was popular like 12 years ago in Sweden. Saw her when I was like eight. Good one. Besides that, my first real concert was the ark I think.. Great Swedish band! 64: Wal-Mart, Target or Kmart? Don't have any of those in Sweden, and can't remember if I've been to any of them when I've travelled, so.... none? 65: Nike or Adidas? Nike? 66: Cheetos Or Fritos? Cheetos? Maybe? Never had 'em though. 67: Peanuts or Sunflower seeds? I like sunflower seeds, man. 68: Ever hear of the group Tres Bien? Nah. 69: Ever take dance lessons? Yeah I did. A took various kinds of dance classes for like six years. Classic ballet, street, jazz, musical.. really fun! 70: Is there a profession you picture your future spouse doing? Oh wow... man I don't even know what I picture myself doing. As long as they're happy with what they're doing, I don't care all that much. 71: Can you curl your tongue? Yeaaa 72: Ever won a spelling bee? Never been in one 73: Have you ever cried because you were so happy? I cry quite easily, so yeah. 74: Own any record albums? I do, very many. Enjoy the feeling of actually having the album. 75: Own a record player? Not anymore :/ 76: Regularly burn incense? I used to, but then I got lazy. 77: Ever been in love? Am in love now. 78: Who would you like to see in concert? Would be cool to see Bastille or arctic monkeys, cause I haven't seen them. Other than that I've seen most of the ones I want to see live. 79: What was the last concert you saw? Uhh... I saw Hozier last February. But other than that the last concert I saw was probably with my friend's band, Royal Prospect. Check them out, they're great and also up and coming! 80: Hot tea or cold tea? Hot. But also cold. Both. 81: Tea or coffee? Tea. 82: Sugar or snickerdoodles? What in the hell is snickerdoodles? 83: Can you swim well? I can, yes. 84: Can you hold your breath without holding your nose? Yes. Is that a thing? 85: Are you patient? I can be very patient, but also childishly impatient. 86: DJ or band, at a wedding? Band. Jazzy ish. 87: Ever won a contest? Won a quiz at school once. Won chocolate. Good one. 88: Ever have plastic surgery? Nope. 89: Which are better black or green olives? Black. 90: Can you knit or crochet? I actually knit half a beanie in school like five or six years ago, but I barely knew what I was doing then, and definitely don't now. 91: Best room for a fireplace? In the bedroom, by the bed. But not too close. Be safe, kids. 92: Do you want to get married? Yes, I'd like that. 93: If married, how long have you been married? Am not married. In a 3+ years relationship though. 94: Who was your HS crush? My current boyfriend. 95: Do you cry and throw a fit until you get your own way? Not really.. 96: Do you have kids? Nope. 97: Do you want kids? Yes I do. 98: Whats your favorite color? Deep, Slytherin green, sunset ish orange, or any shade of grey. 99: Do you miss anyone right now? My friend, who's been backpacking for like four months now, and is home in June or July. Also my other friend, who lives in Scotland, but moves home soooooon. Also my boyfriend, whom I met two days ago. I'm lame.