#note: Kyoko is allowed to say Oktavia's birth name per kechi | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

corisanna · 2 years

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Domestic Witches AU

@catboy-von-seckendorff mentioned that Oktavia might freak out if she saw her parents on the street and that sounded fun to play with

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Oktavia had to go up to Asunaro for a practice performance in the morning. She and Kyoko decided to bring Anthony and make a day of it. So they bundled up against the cold and headed for the subway station.

After the practice, they wandered the shopping district. Anthony loved the animals in a pet store. They were distracted by Anthony babyishly rambling about the kitties he saw while they were wandering the streets on the hunt for a toy store when they bumped into a couple exiting a restaurant. Oktavia adjusted her hold on Anthony then looked up and froze.

Her parents.

"Oh, so sorry," her mom said.

Mom. Her mom.

Kyoko waved and ruefully said, "Nah, our fault. Got too distracted by our kid."

Her dad laughed. "Toddlers are masters of distraction, aren't they?"

Dad. Her dad.

Kyoko laughed then looked at Oktavia. She raised a brow. That was the kind of comment she'd usually laugh at and joke with. But she was frozen in pain and panic.

"Funny?" Anthony asked the laughing adults.

Her parents looked her way. She desperately wished that she put on that big turtleneck that could cover part of the bottom of her face. At least her hair and eyebrow color was completely hidden by her knit cap and the puffy hood of her jacket. But her face. Her face.

Panic. Panic.

Her parents looked at Anthony first. They smiled at him.

Her mom said, "Oh, yes. Very funny." She looked at him more closely. Her brows rose and mixed emotions crossed her face. "Oh. He's beautiful. He-- he reminds me of--"

Dammit why did Anthony have to look so much like her?!

Her mom looked up at her and cut herself off with an, "Oh."

Her dad looked at her properly and looked pained. "Oh."

Oh no. They recognized her. She had the urge to run. But she was rooted to the spot.

Kyoko looked from Oktavia to her parents and back. "What's up?"

"It's just-- it's just--" her mom stammered.

"You just look so much like our daughter," her dad said quietly.

Kyoko's eyes widened. She understood.

Say something. She had to say something. Say something.

"Well," Oktavia said totally not nervously, "you should tell her you ran into her doppelganger today." She added an awkward laugh.

Both of her parents looked deeply sad. Deep grief.

"I wish we could," her mom said softly. "She died when she was fourteen."

Oktavia and Kyoko plastered sympathetic expressions on their faces.

"Oh, no."

"I'm so sorry for your loss."

Anthony looked confused. "Sorry?"

Her dad smiled sadly. "You look like she may have had she gotten the chance to grow up."

"She would be about your age, now," her mom said. She smiled wanly. "Probably not as tall, though."

Yes. The witchy tallness was an asset. Yes.

"I'm sorry to bring up sad memories," Oktavia said. Cool. Play it cool.

Her dad shook his head. "Don't be. You're bringing up good memories. And dreams for her."

"Sayaka as a mother... having a grandchild...," her mom said wistfully. "It would have been wonderful." She looked at Anthony. Her face warmed with a smile. "Treasure every moment with your little one. Even when he gets big. We weren't as present in our daughter's life as we should have been in her last few years. We didn't show her that she was our treasure. We deeply regret that."

"We'll never get the chance to apologize to her for that," her father added somberly.

Her mother nodded and closed her eyes. "If we could have that time back to cherish her and support her... to show her our love more openly... maybe things could have been different."

Oktavia would not break down crying. Would not. Would not say, "It's me! Sayaka!" and "You really do have a grandchild!" Would not say, "I forgive you for that distance," or "It wasn't your fault." Would not hand off Anthony to Kyoko and throw herself at them in a wide embrace. Would not shout "I love you! I miss you!" Couldn't. She so dearly wanted to, but couldn't.

Her mom opened her eyes and gave Oktavia a melancholy smile. "Show your son your love every day. Don't give him a chance to doubt it. Let him know he's your treasure."

Her dad smiled at her and Kyoko. "Kids are miracles. Always remember that."

Oktavia teared up and held Anthony closer. "Yes."

Her mom looked embarrassed and laughed a little, then wiped her eyes. "I'm sorry. We're total strangers getting so preachy with you about parenting."

"Nah, it's cool," Kyoko said as she put her arm around Oktavia's shoulders and squeezed support. "Thanks for the advice. And I really am sorry about your daughter."

Her parents said their goodbyes and left. Oktavia watched their backs until they disappeared around a distant corner. In and out of her life in the span of ten minutes. Probably never to be seen again.

Her heart cracked and ached so badly. She needed to break down sobbing. But not in public. Not in front of Anthony. She stood still with her mouth locked shut and started shaking. Shaking.

"Mama is cold?" Anthony asked, thankfully misinterpreting her shudders as shivers.

Oktavia nodded and forcibly controlled her voice in a strained whisper. "Mama doesn't feel good."

"Oh, no!" Anthony cried cutely. He looked worried. "Soup and naptime?"

Oktavia nodded again.

"Let's get Mama home so she can go to bed, okay?" Kyoko said warmly, though her face was grim.

Anthony looked down the street longingly. "Toys...," he said sadly. Then he turned back and patted Oktavia's cheek with a mittened hand. "Mama is sicky. We help her get better."

Oktavia pressed a kiss into his cheek and struggled to hold back tears. She loved him so much. "You are so good to your mama," she croaked.

He hugged her around the neck and cuddled her.

Getting home was a blur of streets and trains with the constants of Anthony cuddling and Kyoko keeping an arm firmly wrapped around her waist. She kept her mouth pressed shut and tried not to think. Tried to just focus on the goal of reaching her labyrinth.

Mami was near the door when Kyoko opened it. Oktavia shoved Anthony at her as she passed and quickly strode for the bedroom. She faintly heard a "what happened?" as she swept through her labyrinth's door. She broke into a run through the hall and started screaming the moment she entered the main chamber. She ran for her throne and shifted into her full-size witch form but she was so far gone that she couldn't make herself turn and sit on it. Instead, she bent over its seat while gripping the sides and screamed and sobbed. Her orchestra echoed her despair with dramatic music. She lost herself in it.

Mom and Dad. Thought forever lost to her, but back. So briefly. There and gone. Still grieving for her six years later, not knowing she still existed-- that she was living a life they dreamed for her and thought impossible. Regretting their distance. Expressing their love for her to strangers on the street.

Her relationship with them had been complicated, but time had mellowed her opinion of them somewhat. Or at least she had managed to keep her feelings about them at arm's length. Madoka had told her how devastated they had been at her funeral and that had added to the complexity. She had come to think they cared for her but were very flawed. Flawed enough to take them as a lesson in what not to do in parenting her child. Now she had them regretting their flaws and indirectly apologizing for them. The complexity reawakened with a mountain of feelings she already knew she would need time to process.

She felt Kyoko's entry into her labyrinth but didn't move to meet her. She was vaguely aware of Kyoko standing in the entry door, but was too preoccupied. Then Kyoko announced, "I'm coming up," and leapt from floor to throne to her arm near where she had her face buried in the crook of her elbow.

Kyoko stroked the side of her helm where a cheek would be and quietly said something, but Oktavia was too far gone to really hear. Kyoko repeated herself at intervals, gradually getting louder. Oktavia heard her name from a distance but couldn't focus on it. Then Kyoko tenderly said, "Sayaka."

Oktavia paused in her sobbing. Her birth name said with the same emotion that had first brought her out of the all-consuming despair of a witch. Kyoko's voice saying that name would always grab her attention.

"I'm with you, Sayaka. You're not alone in this," Kyoko said gently. She kept stroking the side of her helm. After a minute of quiet, she said, "Hey. Get small so I can hold you while you vent this all out, yeah?"

Oktavia was suddenly desperate to be held. She wanted Kyoko's warmth to anchor her in this stormy sea of emotions. Immediately.

She slowly pulled herself up, careful to not fling Kyoko off her. Kyoko lightly jumped back down to the floor and waited for her. Kyoko's arms were already open when Oktavia shifted to her human form. Oktavia staggered her way towards her but fell to her knees on jelly legs. She reached up for Kyoko pleadingly as she started sobbing again. Kyoko came to her and bent down to embrace her. Oktavia threw her arms around Kyoko's waist with a wail and held on for dear life. Kyoko pushed back Oktavia's hood and removed her knit hat, then stroked Oktavia's hair, arms, and back as Oktavia cried into her front.

Oktavia started babbling through her sobs. She wasn't entirely sure what she was saying but knew it wasn't coherent. The topic was her parents, their relationship, and her feelings about them both in general about having met them. Her words were jumbled sentence fragments muffled by Kyoko's chest. Kyoko never interrupted her, just kept soothing her with touch.

When she finally wore down some from sheer exhaustion, Kyoko gently pushed her back by her shoulders and looked at her affectionately. She pushed Oktavia's messy bangs out of her wet face and stroked her cheek.

"I know this is a mess of feelings to deal with," Kyoko said solemnly. "I know if I walked into my family on the street, I'd... yeah. A mess. I want you to know it's okay to feel a mess right now and I'm gonna be here for you while you untangle it. Or help you untangle it. Whichever. But I'm here, yeah?"

"Ye-- yeah," Oktavia squeaked gratefully. She turned her head to one side to lean it on Kyoko facing out so she could talk better and sniffed hard. "It's not fair."

"No. It's not," Kyoko agreed.

"It sounded like they might understand now."

"Maybe."

"I wanted that so badly."

"Mmm."

"They still miss me after all this time."

"Yeah."

"They really do love me."

"Yeah."

Oktavia closed her eyes and tried not to cry again. "I thought I was past them. But it seems I'm not."

"And that's fine. They're different, so it makes sense you'd have different kinds of feelings about them." Kyoko reached down and tapped under her chin to get her to look up. She wore the expression she used to tell their son to obey her. "This is a hell of a lot to handle. Be upset all you want, vent all you want, whatever. But don't you hole yourself up in here and wallow in it alone all the time. Let me and Mami help. You hear me?"

Oktavia smiled weakly. "Yes, ma'am."

Kyoko's lip turned up in one corner, not quite smirking. She shook a finger at Oktavia. "Now, our son prescribed soup and naptime. He's a smart little thing so I think you'd better take his advice. He's helping Mami make the soup so you have to crash in bed until it's ready if you don't want him to be unhappy."

Oktavia's smile brightened slightly. "Gotta listen to Doctor Tony." Her face softened into love as she reached up with one hand and held Kyoko's cheek. "Thank you. For being here," she said softly.

Kyoko smiled, grabbed her hand, kissed her knuckles, and started hauling Oktavia up off the floor. She looked up at Oktavia when she managed to stand and said, "Always."

#Domestic Witches AU #maybe I should have been numbering these #note: Kyoko is allowed to say Oktavia's birth name per kechi #my writing #gift story

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