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flufffysocks · 3 years

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let's talk about andi mack's worldbuilding

sorry this took forever to make! i've been pretty busy with school stuff and i kind of lost my inspiration for a bit, but i ultimately really enjoyed writing it! i wish i could've included more pics (tumblr has a max of 10 per post), and it kinda turned from less of a mini analysis to more of an extremely long rant... but i hope it's still a fun read!

i've been rewatching the show over the past few weeks (thanks again to @disneymack for the link!), and i’ve been noticing a lot that i never did the first time around. this is really the first time i’ve watched the show from start to finish since it aired, and it honestly feels so different this time - probably a combination of the fact that i’m not as focused on plot and can appreciate the show as a whole, and also that the fandom is much, much smaller now, so there’s a lot less noise. so the way i’m consuming this show feels super different than it did the first time, but the show itself doesn’t - it’s just as warm and comforting to me as it was the first time around, if not more so.

i think a lot of that can be attributed to andi mack’s “worldbuilding”. i’m not quite sure that this is the right word in this context, to be honest, because i mostly see it used in reference to fantasy and sci-fi universes, but it just sort of feels right to me for andi mack, because you can really tell how much love and care went into constructing this universe. for clarity, worldbuilding is “the process of creating an imaginary world” in its simplest sense. there’s two main types: hard worldbuilding, which involves inventing entire universes, languages, people, cultures, places, foods, etc. from scratch (think “lord of the rings” or “dune”), and soft worldbuilding, in which the creators don’t explicitly state or explain much about the fictional universe, but rather let it’s nature reveal itself as the story progresses (think studio ghibli films). andi mack to me falls in the soft worldbuilding category. even though it takes place in a realistic fiction universe, there’s a lot of aspects to it that are inexplicably novel in really subtle ways.

so watching the show now, i’ve noticed that the worldbuilding comes primarily from two things - setting and props, and oftentimes the both of them in tandem (because a big part of setting in filmmaking does depend on the props placed in it!).

one of the most obvious examples is the spoon. it really is a sort of quintessential, tropic setting in that it's the main gang's "spot", which automatically gives it a warm and homey feel to it. and its set design only amplifies this:

the choice to make it a very traditional 50s-style diner creates a very nostalgic, retro feel to it, which is something that's really consistent throughout the show, as you'll see. from the round stools at the bar, to the booths, to the staff uniforms, this is very obvious. the thing that i found especially interesting about it though is the choice of color. the typical 50s diner is outfitted with metallic surfaces and red accented furnishings, but the spoon is very distinctly not this.

instead, it's dressed in vibrant teal and orange, giving it a very fresh and modern take on a classic look. so it still maintains that feeling of being funky and retro, but that doesn't retract from the fact that the show is set distinctly in modern times.

of course, this could just be a one-off quirky set piece, but this idea of modernizing and novelizing "retro" things is a really common motif throughout the show. take red rooster records. i mean, it's a record shop - need i say more? it's obviously a very prominent store in shadyside, at least for the main characters, but there's no apparent reason why it is (until season 2 when bowie starts working there, and jonah starts performing there). a lot of the time, though, it functions solely as a record shop. vinyl obviously isn't the most practical or convenient way of listening to music, but it's had its resurgence in pop culture even in the real world, mostly due to its aesthetic value, so it's safe to say that it serves the same purpose in the andi mack universe.

the fringe seems to be nostalgic of a different era, specifically the Y2K/early 2000s period (because it's meant to be bex's territory and symbolic of who she used to be, and its later transformation into cloud 10 is representative of her character arc, but that's beside the point). to be honest, exactly what this store was supposed to be always confused me. it was kind of a combination party store/clothing store/makeup store/beauty parlor? i think that's sort of the point of it though, it's supposed to feel very grunge-y and chaotic (within the confines of a relatively mellow-toned show, of course), and it's supposed to act as a sort of treasure chest of little curios that both make the place interesting and allow the characters to interact with it.

and, of course, there's andi shack. this is really the cherry on top of all of andi mack's sets, just because it's so distinctly andi. it serves such amazing narrative purpose for her (ex. the storyline where cece and ham were going to move - i really loved this because it highlights its place in the andi mack universe so well, and i'm a sucker for the paper cranes shot + i'm still salty that sadie's cranes didn't make it into the finale) and it's the perfect reflection of andi's character development because of how dynamic it is (the crafts and art supplies can get moved around or switched out, and there's always new creations visible).

going back to the nostalgia motif though, the "shack" aspect of it always struck me as very treehouse-like. personally, whenever i think of treehouses, there's this very golden sheen of childhood about it, if that makes sense. i've always seen treehouses in media as a sort of shelter for characters' youthful innocence and idealistic memories. for example, the episode "up a tree" from good luck charlie, the episode "treehouse" from modern family, and "to all the boys 2" all use a treehouse setting as a device to explore the character's desire to hold onto their perfect image of their childhood (side note: this exact theme is actually explored in andi mack in the episode "perfect day 2.0"!). andi shack is no exception to this, but it harnesses this childhood idealism in the same way that it captures the nostalgia of the 50s in the spoon, or the early 2000s in the fringe. it's not some image of a distant past being reflected through that setting; it's very present, and very alive, because it reflects andi as she is in the given moment.

some honorable mentions of more one-off settings include the ferris wheel (from "the snorpion"), the alley art gallery (from "a walker to remember"), SAVA, the color factory (from "it's a dilemna"), and my personal favorite, the cake shop (from "that syncing feeling").

[every time i watch this episode i want to eat those cakes so bad]

these settings have less of a distinctly nostalgic feel (especially the color factory, which is a very late 2010s, instagram era setting), but they all definitely have an aura of perfection about them. andi mack is all about bright, colorful visuals, and these settings really play to that, making the andi mack universe seem really fun and inviting, and frankly very instagrammable (literally so, when it comes to the color factory!).

props, on the other hand, are probably a much less obvious tool of worldbuilding. they definitely take up less space in the frame and are generally not as noticeable (i'm sure i'll have missed a bunch that will be great examples, but i'm kind of coming up with all of this off the top of my head), but they really tie everything together.

for example, bex's box, bex's polaroid, and the old tv at the mack apartment (the tv is usually only visible in the periphery of some shots, so you might not catch it at first glance) all complement that very retro aesthetic established through the settings (especially the polaroid and the tv, because there's really no good reason that the characters would otherwise be using these).

besides this, andi's artistic nature provides the perfect excuse for plenty of colorful, crafty props to amplify the visuals and the tone. obviously, as i discussed before, andi shack is the best example of this because it's filled with interesting props. but you also see bits of andi's (and other people's) crafts popping up throughout the show (ex. the tape on the fridge in the mack apartment, andi's and libby's headbands in "the new girls", walker's shoes, andi's phone case, and of course, the bracelet). not only does doing this really solidify this talent as an essential tenet of andi's character, but it also just makes the entirety of shadyside feel like an extension of andi shack. the whole town is a canvas for her crafts (or art, depending on how you want to look at it. i say it's both), and it immensely adds to shadyside's idealism. because who wouldn't want to live in a world made of andi mack's creations?

and, while it's not exactly a prop, the characters' wardrobe is undoubtedly a major influence on the show's worldbuilding. true to it's nature as a disney channel show, all of the characters are always dressed in exceptionally curated outfits of whatever the current trends are, making the show that much more visually appealing. i won't elaborate too much on this, because i could honestly write a whole other analysis on andi mack's fashion (my favorites are andi's and bex's outfits! and kudos to the costume designer(s) for creating such wonderful and in-character wardrobes!). but, i think it's a really really important aspect of how the show's universe is perceived, so it had to be touched upon.

[^ some of my favorite outfits from the show! i am so obsessed with andi's jacket in the finale, and i aspire to be at bex's level of being a leather jacket bisexual]

and lastly, phones. this is a bit of an interesting case (pun intended), because the way they're used fluctuates a bit throughout the show, but i definitely noticed that at least in the first season terri minsky tried to avoid using them altogether. these efforts at distancing from modern tech really grounds the show in it's idealist, nostalgia-heavy roots, so even when the characters start using their phones more later in the show, they don't alter the viewer's impression of the andi mack universe very much.

so, what does all of this have to do with worldbuilding? in andi mack's case, because it's set in a realistic universe and not a fantasy one, a lot of what sets it apart from the real world comes down to tone. because, as much as this world is based on our own, it really does feel separate from it, like an alternate reality that's just slightly more perfect than ours, which makes all the difference. it's the idealism in color and composition in andi mack's settings that makes it so unmistakably andi mack. even the weather is always sunny and perfect (which is incredibly ironic because the town is called shadyside - yes, i am very proud of that observation).

the andi mack universe resides somewhere in this perfect medium that makes it feel like a small town in the middle of nowhere (almost like hill valley in 1955 from "back to the future"), but at the same time like an enclave within a big city (because of its proximity to so many modern, unique, and honestly very classy looking establishments). it is, essentially, an unattainable dream land that tricks you into believing it is attainable because it's just real enough.

all this to say, andi mack does an amazing job of creating of polished, perfect world for its characters. this is pretty common among disney channel and nickelodeon shows, but because most other shows tend to be filmed in a studio with three-wall sets, andi mack is really set apart from them in that it automatically feels more real and tangible. it has its quintessential recurring locations, but it has far more of them (most disney/nick shows usually only have 3-4 recurring settings), and it has a lot more one-off locations. it's also a lot more considerate when it comes to its props, so rather than the show just looking garish and aggressively trendy, it has a distinctive style that's actually appropriate to the characters and the story. overall this creates the effect of expanding the universe, making shadyside feel like it really is a part of a wider world, rather than an artificial bubble. it's idealism is, first and foremost, grounded in reality, and that provides a basis for its brilliant, creative, and relatable storytelling.

tl;dr: andi mack's sets and props give it a very retro and nostalgic tone which makes its whole universe seem super perfect and i want to live there so bad!!

#andi mack #buffy driscoll #cyrus goodman #jonah beck #tj kippen #tyrus #ambi #bex mack #analysis #film analysis #disney channel

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aurora-daily · 3 years

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AURORA’s Reddit Q&A (July 13th 2021)

Kmilalv: Hello aurora we love you, I'm @ aurora.s_love on instagram ✨✨🥰🥰🧚‍♀️🧚‍♀️ Aurora: oh hellooo!!!! Exportmusic: Meep Aurora: meep < 3 Lisxnne: WELL HELLO AND THANKS FOR YOUR NEW SONG! 🙏🌟💕 Aurora: HELLO!! and thank you for being open to it 24681357900: Thank u for making music Aurora: thank you for inviting it into your heart Emergency-Club-7529: This is have some upper case , it's the real Aurora Aurora: yes!!! Helloooooo brunamombach: hello ✨🃏🧚🏻‍♂️🤘🍇🍄🧚🏻‍♀️ when are you coming do Brazil? so glad to see you here!!! Aurora: I think I will be coming to Brazil next year I love being in Brazil because I feel like it awakens my heart and soul to be there !! Brunamombach: if you were going to an souless island, what book would you bring with you? 🧚🏻‍♂️🍇🍄🧚🏻‍♀️🤘🃏 kisses from Brazil Aurora: I would either take: "The name of the wind" and "a Wise mans fear" or the LOTR trilogy. Or the "Mistborn" trilogy. or "warbreaker" or "the good omens" or "the ocean at the end of the lane" or "Anne of Green gables" or "The alchemist" or just all the books in the world oh no I cant decide

all DanParis: Hey have some karma you cool bean 🤌🏼 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿 Aurora: thank you < 3 Ok-Estimate8468: Tell us something you can tell us about the second track on the Cure For Me vinyl, “Potion For Love”. I'm very curious...

Aurora: its the song I decided for the B-side of the vinyl, and I will probably release it digitally one day too. Its the sister song to "exist for love" but from the other perspective. where love does not fill you up, but love has left a big hole within you < / 3 Ok-Estimate8468: Did you get a lot of unfollows and hate from bad people due to Cure For Me? Aurora: I got a little hate from homophobes, and also abelist, and racist comments from people claiming there was nothing wrong with their mindset. BUT it does not bother me. and I will never stop speaking up about the things I find important. because.. what else would our meaning on this earth be? if that makes sense. Some people have attacked me personally, but sadly mostly its people defending their own hateful ways of being. I cant even imagine how it really is to be a victim of racism or violent homophobia, so I feel like the least I can do is to try the best I can to show support. and speak up. and be an ally.

So a bit more short - yes, and I really dont mind!!!! unfollow me if you find speaking about equality and the right to live, and love and be loved unsettling <3 thank you for this question! Ok-Estimate8468: How was the process of creating the studio version of Cure For Me? I heard your first acoustic performance and saw that it's much smoother than the studio, so I was curious to see how you managed to create another even more amazing version. Aurora: Me and Magnus just played around, and we really tried to go with our emotions, and to be playful and to not think too much about what was "AURORA" or what was even...pretty! we just laughed! and danced! and did what felt lovely to us.

I think this is why the making of this song is one of my favourite memories, and also I think that is why it sounds so playful! because it is!! it was like playing a game. and I did also play alot around with symbolics in both the lyrics and the way this song is produced. it all has a meaning you see... but of course I will let you figure that out yourself!!

Pingouiin_: What's your favourite mountain around bergen ? Aurora: mine is Løvstakken!! and Magnus loves Ullrikken!! but important to NEVER stop a Norwegian person walking on the mountain. just say. a quick hello and wander off your own mind. become at one with nature Whoamiandallthat: Thank you for existing, I love your art and you inspire me so much 💙 You are one of my favorite artists 😊 And just the other day I found out that you are just two years older than me, and so successful... I'm wondering how it was for you to become so popular, did you feel like people thought you needed a cure? I'm also in the sphere of arts - filmmaking; but I feel like my films are not good enough... I have a YouTube channel with some videos - if you ever see this comment I would like for you to check it out 😊 Aurora: Ive felt through my life like something was a little off, ive never resonated that much with the people or the "system" around me! it didn't bother me so much even though I. was teased a lot for it ( so again I was very lucky) but I never felt like I understood the world and my place in it. or how I. could fit in, in this worlds society and with other people ! and becoming "famous" which I dont really feel that I am, but I guess that I am a little "known" (meep) was very strange, and very hard to handle at first. as impressions affect me a lot, and noises and people etc. but with time I got better at handling all these impressions, and avoid getting a.. sensory overload! and I am so happy now, that I can look directly at strangers and actually listen to them, and understand them, and even love them I guess what I am trying to say, that ive now understood that this is the very thing that connected me to all of you. and now I see my place here on this earth. and I see all of you, and you give my life so much meaning!! Lets_Fight_Dragons: Firstly I wanted to say I recently discovered your music and I love everything about it. I have two questions, I hope that’s ok 1. How do you start writing songs because I’m trying to get into songwriting and I’m not sure how you write such amazing songs 2. What’s your favourite song you’ve released? Aurora: 1. well I dont really know. ( I am sorry!!) but I feel like it started really natural for me.. I. kind of just sat down with my piano.. and then I started playing around with the Keyes, and I figured out I could make an endless amount of melodies by simply pressing the keys in a different order!! remember finding this extremely magical (I was around 6 years old then) and after a while I started adding lyrics, and I just spent time looking into myself, trying to figure out. - what do I want to say? what do. I need to hear in a song? what do the world need to hear in a song? and etc. I always think about songwriting as storytelling. and I always start out by figuring out what story I want to tell, what matter I want to dress, or what pleases me, or annoys me with the world, or what emotion I need help dealing with!! and then I write a song!!! and if you feel like its difficult to come up with melodies, I would recommend finding a song you like, and learn the chords of it (or find an instrumental version. online) and then you make your own melodies on top of that! many of the songs of the world share the same chords, and often the melodies on top is the thing separating them. music belongs to all of us, and its clear that every song in the world comes from the same magical source. 2. I think its the seed. or couples creatures!! or infections of a different kind!! tiffnoir: Our dear AURORA, your b-side A Potion For Love is helping me a lot (broken heart since a few days ago). I wanted to ask (if I can haha) if would it be included at the upcoming album, or maybe a relaxing, vintage video for it? Thanks for helping all of us with your music ^_^ Aurora: thank you som much for letting this song into your heart after writing exist for love, I figured that I should also make a sister-song that could belong for the ones with a broken heart as well it will not be on the album, but for you I will try to put it on the deluxe version FedahpWithThisWurld: Hello, Aurora! I'm a neurodivergent person and I have always felt a lot of shame over being the way I am, like I'm not good enough. Your music makes me feel better and it makes me feel that being me is okay. Thank you for that. I want to know how you manage to be so confident? Do you ever get nervous before a show? Aurora: hello!!!! I have had a lot of similar experiences with myself in this world too.. so I am very sad to hear you've lived your life with this feeling I think after a while I understood what makes me different also makes me special. and special is good. and if you think about it, special isn't even that different, because in one way or another we are all... unique. but of course, some people have had to fight their. way through life more than others.. making it less easy to learn how to love yourself. and accept yourself. I guess, now I've surrounded myself with good people who understand my quirks and sensitivities, people who give me time. and space to be me. I have also been lucky, because I have a family that have always encouraged me to be myself. and to love myself. and I guess that is why I am trying to convey to all of you now, because now we are like al little family. where being who you are - is cool. and you're cool. and were all cool. and I get nervous all the time, of all sorts of things! but I just accept that feeling as a part of being human. its uncomfortable yes, but I know at least it won't kill me! 3charmplease: What was it like recording for Frozen? Aurora: it was magical and also slightly scary. but it felt safe and good calling at the mountains. and I feel warm thinking about it. especially now. cause my father just walked over to me with five little strawberries in his hand. he gave them all to me. and they were so small, and sweet. im currently sitting in my childhood home, right next to the very piano where I wrote "runaway" and so many other songs. Tiny-Sink-2397: Boom shake shake shake the room Aurora: that was actually during the recording process of Cure For Me! Tiny-Sink-2397: I thought it was!! Seemed like an epic party Aurora: YES Joelynxyzs: what's your favorite movie ? Aurora: Practical magic BUT ALSO THESE: The LOTR triology ALL GHIBLI MOVIES avatar once upon a time in Hollywood Hannah the perfume fantastic MR. fox Star Wars: a new hope rouge one isle of dogs the hunchback of Notre dame! the arrival stypop: If you were to get the chance to work on a sequel to another Disney movie, which one would you want it to be? Aurora: since Disney owns Lucas films I would love to be a part of the Star Wars universe or to play either a magical fairy, witch mermaid, forest nymph, or a scary beast!! WE WO brisot: The masks in CFM remind me of theater plays, do you ever watch any and how much of an influence for you is the art of acting? Aurora: this era of my life is very influenced by the ancient times where theatre was all they had. no CGI or special effects etc. and I really wanted all these videos to feel very authentic, and down to earth! The shell in "exist for love" was handmade by someone, and I painted all the masks in "cure for me" myself! so I like it when it feels... human Clear-Champion-1833: i love you Aurora:

Jicuhrabbitkim: How do you like your fried eggs cook!! I like it when its very crispy!! Aurora: as long as its from a local farm that has free healthy chickens that walk about freely and eat good food I like my eggs crispy too. GhostReaper3: Hi I have a question as well: How do you keep positive? Many people including myself find this difficult sometimes so it would be good to hear your technique or way of keeping upbeat and positive! Also, thank you for sharing your music with us! Aurora: I know what you mean, i've struggled with it myself at times. but I guess I tried separating in my mind what I can do something about, and what I cant? if that makes sense?? we are all just here on this planet. and though we all seem to be going though the same things we still feel so alone, in our thoughts and in our minds. And I've been very aware that with music, and with this fandom we can all finally connect, and see each other, and know that we are not alone! and if there is one thing I love, it is to dance a little after I've cried. I think its important to. shake these emotions out of our body. like animals do! and then I made CURE FOR ME. because I thought about all the warriors out there feeling. a little crazy... after isolation! or after being depressed! and being l rocked in with their families that might not accept them for who they are.. and I thought I needed to make a song for us all, that felt a little uplifting. and uniting. just so we know where not alone, and just so we know that we are worthy.. of everything! and that we are worthy of celebrating ourselves!! ALWAYS! aniri003: Were the dancers freestyling in the last part of the video Aurora: YES! I told them to put their freak game on. And they were amazing. L_pls_use_revive: Hei Aurora! Apart from inspiring me with your music for emotional people, I also dicovered my love for Norway and the Norwegian language through you - now studying it in my second year at university. Tusen, tusen takk! I want to visit soon when traveling is safe - So which place should I not miss out on? Have a great life! Aurora: I think the whole of Norway is worth visiting! there are so many beautiful places. and beautiful people! I would ofc. recommend Bergen! (haha!) but also places like Tromsø, Trondheim, Stavanger, lofted and The Geirangerfjord and the Northwest!!! HAHA KakSetoKaiba: How's the progress of the album that you've been preparing which will be released after your death? Aurora: its going well, I take one song for every chapter and I put it on my death album instead of the album I'm making its going well. and im excited about it! maria_fernandez_: This is not a question but I just wanted to tell you that discovering you and your music has been the best thing that ever happened to me. What your music makes me feel cannot be described in words. I love you so much. Greetings from Spain!! Aurora: thank you!!! applepieaurora: Whats your favorite pie? 🐉 Aurora: apple pie and blueberry pie!! Ok-Potato7244: Thanks for sharing your time ... a warrior here to welcome you...Have some tea...And i don't need a cure for disliking keeping animals in cages...Especially birds...💚... Aurora: thank you pekaraseva: what do you feel when you perform Ioadk or Adkoh for people? Aurora: I feel so full of emotion and love and despair I could almost explode and its wonderful. I also feel insanely connected to the audience when I sing these songs.. I. think. its because they are such important pieces of my soul targaryenblood02: omg what do you think cure for me would smell like? 🐛 Aurora: like something Brazilian! like Asai! or caipirinha! or Brigadeiro!

sproutingephemeral: Hello Aurora, Thanks for your new song, I've gotten quite addicted to it😊 I have a question that might be a bit difficult to answer. I am a Warrior from the U.S. currently without a clue of where I should be and what I should be doing. I'm done with school, and in the process of moving to a new town with my parents. I'm applying for jobs, but I feel like I can't find my reason for being in a smaller area with not many people my age. I feel like my parents are trying to mold me into a certain person, which doesn't feel authentic to me. I probably should be making more of my own decisions at my age, but I'm a bit scared and confused, if what I think is deemed too unrealistic or out of line with their expectations for me (like a childhood dream?). I tried talking to them about it, to little success. Is there something inherently wrong with me? Or am I just being spoiled or lazy? I read about how you were initially opposed to starting your career until your mother convinced you to change your mind. How do you know whether or not to trust in your parents' plans for you? On a lighter note, do you prefer cookies that are more soft (chewy) or hard (crumbly)? I don't need a cure for...my autism, and tendency to talk regularly to my deceased cat at his grave (??)😿👼 Looking forward to seeing you in New York! Take care❤❤ Aurora: you should ALWAYS. only do what feels right for you. this world is very absurd, and people tend to think they know what is meaningful and what is important. but we all know, money and success isn't important beyond what you need to simply survive. this one life is yours. and you should be just who you want. and do what feels right for you. because its yours. its only yours. drink tea. work hard. be lazy. dance. be shy. laugh, cry. drink wine and eat good bread. be good. fight for something you care about. and either live for your work, or work a little and then just... live. get a garden, grow tomatoes, get a cat. or a dog. or a parrot. life can be so random, and it can be both so little, and so large at the same time. some days were meant to TAKE chances, and live. and sometimes were just meant to exist. and do nothing. you should never feel guilty for not "being enough" because you are enough. just who you are. just how you are. is enough. good luck on your strange journey my warrior, maybe our paths crosses and maybe they dont. but know, when you walk out of your door, that anything can happen! and the whole world is yours. Hippolyte_gray: is the name of the next album hidden in your previous songs ? Aurora: mayyyyyybeeeeeeeee rashadalt: what do you think about your fans who are racist/homophobic etc.? Aurora: I feel sorry for them. because I know I cant be easy l living a life so full of hate. and even spending your precious. time on this world bringing other people down. and I know how easy it is for people to be driven by fear, and how difficult. it can be to have an original meaning and stand up for what you really mean. so I dont judge them, or hate them,

but I do feel sorry for them. and I am also very disappointed in them. because its such a. waste of human potential to live your life in the paths of hatred.

but as long as we face hate with love, we will eventually win. when we show them. we are not the enemy, just people trying to make a better world, I think, and I hope that eventually we can all agree that being able to live, and being able to love is a human right. Brivera726: I noticed you said you would bring LOTR trilogy with you to an island- I’m reading them for the fourth time right now I feel like if Galadriel sing songs it would sound like you! Anyway I really like your art so yah just keep doing u- love from PFC Rivera, USMC Aurora: this is then est thing ive ever read thank you Aurora: I am. sorry people, but my time here (for tonight) is up </3 but I will probably be back looking at your questions and thoughts because I did really. enjoy this. and I. love you all so. much.

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#aurora #aurora aksnes #q&a #interviews #potion for love #cure for me #into the unknown #collaborations #recommendations #ioadk song #adkoh #new album #future album #magnus

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hatterstan-shameblog · 3 years

Note

I did mean hatter x you as in you(the person that runs this blog) not as in hatter x the reader, sorry for the confusion.

Hatter X Me (Specifically)?

I can see it now...

💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕

It’s half-past eight in the evening, and I am sitting on one of the black leather sofas in Hatter’s room. I am hyper-aware of the fact that the back of my legs are sticking to said black leather sofa, just as I am hyper-aware of the fact that there is a very intense and partially shirtless man sitting next to me.

I tell myself that this is fine. I do not believe that this is fine, but I tell myself that it is, anyways. He has given me some kind of whiskey, and I take a nervous sip. It’s actually pretty good, and I tell him as much. He says something about it having notes of caramel and I nod, pretending to know what that means.

“What’s your specialty?” Hatter asks. I tell him that my specialty is panicking in stressful situations. He laughs. This is good, I think. I am Succeeding at Conversation.

He moves closer to me. I move closer to the arm of the sofa. I put my drink on the side table and then immediately pick it back up to take another sip.

I have a small crisis when he puts his arm around the back of the sofa and leaves his hand to lazily rest on my shoulder. I have another small crisis when he takes his sunglasses off and I attempt to make eye contact—you know, like a normal person.

“You look nice,” he tells me, the fingers of his opposite hand fussing with the hem of the sundress I have covering my swimsuit. I thank him. I tell him it has pockets. He laughs. I laugh too, but in a way that says ‘I am going to regret every second of this interaction for the rest of my life.’

He looks like he might kiss me. I am. Stressed out about this. I do not know why he would want to kiss me. I ask myself if I want him to kiss me. Myself says “Uh?” and is generally very unhelpful.

Before I can stop myself, I’m asking him what his favorite movie is. This is because I have never been cool about anything in my entire life, and also because I believe that a person’s favorite movie says a lot about who they are. For example, if his favorite movie is Moulin Rouge!, I will take off the sundress with the pockets and let him do whatever he wants to me. If it’s something like Manchester By The Sea, I will immediately leave the room and never talk to him again.

This is a very solid plan, I think.

To my surprise—and intense delight—he ponders the question for a moment before telling me that it would be impossible to choose just one favorite. I ask him for a top five. He tells me it might end up being more like a top seven or eight. I assure him that this is the exact opposite of a problem.

He tells me he likes The Godfather. He likes the Keira Knightly version of Pride and Prejudice. We get into a debate over whether Spirited Away or Howl’s Moving Castle is the best Ghibli movie, and settle on The Cat Returns being criminally underrated.

The topic shifts to television. Then to music. He is very easy to talk to, and the alcohol only makes it easier. I consider the whole ‘kiss’ thing again. Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad? He has nice lips...

...And, apparently, I’ve said that last part out loud, because he’s thanking me with a smile and a chuckle. My brain speed runs through all five stages of grief as I ask him if he uses one of those fancy lip scrubs I’ve heard about on Instagram and have never actually known anyone to use in real life. He tells me no, but that he is rather fond of the classic cherry flavor of Chapstick. Katy Perry starts singing “I Kissed a Girl” in my head like it’s 2008 or something, and I do my best to banish her to the shadow realm. It almost works.

It’s time to abort mission. I’ve said too much. My drink is a sad little slurry of mostly-melted ice and a teensy bit of watered-down whiskey, and I am very subtly trying to unstick myself from the sofa. I make an excuse about needing to be up early the next morning, and he seems to accept this, even though we both know that I have absolutely nothing to do tomorrow except sit by the pool with a margarita and contemplate my most-likely-fleeting mortality before the next game.

He’s—oh boy, aw geez, he’s moving in closer. Absolute madman is actually going to try and kiss me, even after I said I thought The Ramones are kind of overrated and I know it hurt him deeply but he acted like it didn’t. Maybe he liked my opinions on Paper Mario and the Thousand-Year Door enough to overlook that part?

Either way, I decide to hit him with the ol’ “Swerve Into A Hug Maneuver,” which works out splendidly in my favor because:

Being hugged is nice.

Being hugged by a very attractive man who appreciates The Talking Heads is very nice.

My evil little hands have been absolutely desperate to touch his kimono all night and I didn’t know how to ask him without making it weird(er), but now I have a ten-second window of sensory enjoyment as I respectfully but intently hold him to my person.

I do not need to tell you that the kimono is very smooth and warm and I am a better person for having touched it. I also do not need to tell you that he is truly well-versed in the art of embracing, and that his hair smells nice, and that I am very much hoping to be hugged by him again sometime in the near future.

“This was nice,” he tells me as we pull apart. I agree. I am also very thankful that he isn’t upset about the whole not kissing him thing. That is. Well. Maybe another time. Maybe. May. Be.

He walks me to the door. I thank him for his hospitality by saying “Thank you for your hospitality” and he says that I am most welcome by saying “You’re most welcome.”

I decide that this is a very good opportunity to kiss him on the cheek, so I kiss him on the cheek. I do not miss, but I also almost poke him in the eye with my nose, which is not ideal.

His skin is very nice-feeling, so I tell him that. Then I apologize for sounding like a serial killer, because that seems like something a serial killer might say. He tells me not to worry about it. I will worry about it for the next ten thousand years, unfortunately, but he doesn’t need to know that.

He kisses me back, the same way that I kissed him—minus the whole nose thing, of course. It’s nice in the way that kittens are nice, but also nice in the way that the pottery scene from Ghost is nice. I am definitely blushing. He definitely notices.

He tells me that I am adorable. He tells me we should do this again sometime. I have been rendered incapable of speech for the moment, so I just nod. He suggests lunch tomorrow. I nod again.

This is fine. Everything’s fine.

I say “Uh” and then I say “I’ll make us soup.” Soup is good. People like soup. Soup says “I care about you and also please do not judge me too harshly,” which is the exact mood I would like to inspire for our next meeting.

He says that sounds great. If I make eye contact with this man I will burst into flames, and not in a cute/fun/sexy/provocative way. It’ll be in an off-putting way, a way that prevents me from making soup tomorrow and that would just be...Very Not Good. When I promise someone soup, I keep that promise. I am a woman of my word. (In this way, at least.)

He opens the door. I tell him “goodnight” and he tells me “goodnight” back. I exit the room and he watches me walk down the hall towards the elevator. I am very proud of myself for not tripping over my flip-flops until after he has retreated back to his room.

I get back to my room. I get into bed. I regret every awkward thing I said to the man. I regret not asking if I could wear the kimono. I do not regret suggesting he watch Hannibal because it is a very good show and I think he would appreciate its overall aesthetic.

I think about soup recipes until I fall asleep at half-past three in the morning.

This is fine. Everything is fine.

#alice in borderland #hatter #danma takeru #alice in borderland netflix #y’all THOUGHT I was gonna get with him huh??? WRONG #I am actually Like This in real life (slightly dramatized for writing reasons but this is the general vibe)#writings and such

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jojiship · 4 years

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Studio Ghibli Films: Thoughts & Rankings

I have been binging Studio Ghibli (and other anime films) since May. I saw a lot of people in Youtube rank them and I decided to do it as well. While I don’t have a camera to record myself, I decided to post my ranking of its films. First of all, I want to say that this is quite a subjective ranking and it’s personal. These are my opinions and of course, everyone can have opinions of their own. Second of all, I think all of these films have their good sides, but there are ones that I enjoyed and there are ones I didn’t enjoy. Either way, I recommend people to watch all of these films. You won’t regret watching most of them.

This post ranks the films from the 5th to 1st. Obviously, there will be spoilers ahead, so you’ve been warned.

5. Princess Mononoke (1997) – I would watch the animation of the nature in this film for hours in loop. It’s so wonderful, beautiful and breathtaking. Whether it’s animating the lake, the forest or even just the trees, I was in awe of it. It truly makes you appreciate it and again, Studio Ghibli shows you how much they love nature themselves. Now, let’s talk about the film. The film was amazing. The best word for it is amazing. The plot was so different and yet so captivating. There wasn’t a moment in this film where I was bored and where I felt it dragged along. Seeing this battle between humans and nature was what I had to see. When I was a kid, I didn’t appreciate this film as much, but now, it’s definitely one of my favourite films and in my top five of Studio Ghibli films. All the characters were incredibly well written, especially Ashitaka, San and Lady Eboshi. I love how there was no villain in this film. Yes, Lady Eboshi and her people were ruining the forest, but they were also trying to live their lives and grow as a community. I loved how everyone played a part in the village, the men, the woman and even the disables, had roles. You don’t see this in many films and I like that Princess Mononoke showed us that. The boars and the wolves were interesting to see as well. The bond that San had with her family and how she hated humans because of how she was raised. The ending was great. I liked that Ashitaka decided to stay and help with Irontown rather than go with San like some people expected him to. The only thing that truly bothered me was the face of the Forest Spirit. It haunted me for days which prove how much it creeped me out. If someone told me that the face of the Forest Spirit was their sleep paralysis demon, I would believe them in the spot.

4. My Neighbor Totoro (1988) - The first Studio Ghibli film that I’ve seen is My Neighbor Totoro. It’s the kind of film that reminds me of my childhood and it’s the one that gives me a nostalgic feeling. I love it so much that it’s definitely the film of Studio Ghibli that I’ve seen the most. It has this charm that should be more prevalent in other animated films, especially films for kids. Every scene is truly like magic. Whether it’s the umbrella scene at the bus stop, or the scene where the tree grows, or even the scene with the cat bus and the girls. Satsuki and Mei are enjoyable, vibrant and interesting characters. The bond between them reminds me a lot of my bond with my older sister. You can definitely say that I was a lot like Mei as a little kid (Yes, I did get lost one time and made my whole family, especially my sister lose their mind). Again, this film embraces the beauty of being a child. It shows the curiosity, the innocence, the energy and the imagination that most kids possess at that age. Totoro is such an interesting character design and it’s no surprise that it’s the logo of Studio Ghibli. My Neighbor Totoro speaks to my inner child and reminds me of the good old days. It’s a film that I’ll recommend to everyone, but especially young kids. Also, it’s the Studio Ghibli film that makes me smile through the whole of it. If I’m feeling sad or if I’m not in a good mood, I watch My Neighbor Totoro and it never fails to make me feel better.

3. Spirited Away (2001) – Objectively, I think Spirited Away is the best film that Studio Ghibli has ever produced. Personally, it’s the third, but that doesn’t mean it’s worse than the second and first. It’s a matter of preference that I have. Again, I watched this film as a kid and I did enjoy it a lot. I always called it one of the best animated films. I rewatched it in May after years of not watching it and I loved it just as much as I did when I was a kid if not more. Miyazaki created an unforgettable film with an astounding plot, amazing characters and an exciting world building. Chihiro is your typical kid. She can be whiny and scared just as every kid is her age. The growth that she goes through the film was amazing. Watching her work hard and her progress was such a good watch. You could see her struggle with cleaning at first, but soon enough, she got the hang of it. Also, as much as I love the film, I couldn’t help but think that her parents were a bit dumb. Like my parents wouldn’t have done any of the things her parents did. My dad wouldn’t have sped like that in such a dangerous road and they definitely would have turned around after coming close to the temple. Either way, I’m glad that they screwed up though because it gave me this film. The other characters like Haku, Yubaba, Zeniba, Lin and many others were brilliant. Out of all this, I enjoyed Haku the most. The way he helped Chihiro was so nice and their whole bond was fascinating to see on screen. The guests in the bathhouse were designed so well and were just so good. I don’t have any words to describe the scenes with No Face or the spirit of the polluted river because they are out of this world. No wonder this film won an Oscar for best animated film. The details, the story, the animation, the characters, the soundtrack and the world building all deserve an Oscar of their own.

2. Grave of the Fireflies (1988) - I don’t think I’ve ever cried with any film, book or series as much as I cried with this. Even when it ended and I had turned my TV off, I was crying. It’s one of the saddest films I’ve ever watched and truly, the saddest film Studio Ghibli has ever made. It touched my heart immediately when it started and it ended up ripping it at the end. I knew that it wasn’t going to have a happy ending, the beginning tells you that it’s going to end quite sadly. Yet I was taken back by the scenes, especially the last scenes. The story of Seita and Setsuko is a story that many kids have experienced in war. In most war films, we are shown battles, we are shown armies, soldiers etc., but not in this film. In this film, we saw the personal history of siblings trying to survive war and bombings. Seeing Setsuko hallucinating was heartbreaking and it was in that moment when I started to cry. When Seita said that she never woke up after that, I couldn’t control myself. Funeral scenes have been hard for me to watch lately, but not a single funeral scene has broken my heart like the one in this film. The scene where Home Sweet Home played in the background left me speechless and I still don’t know how to explain how I feel with that scene. Grave of the Fireflies is a film that is all too real and it made my whole body hurt at the end. Although it's ranked second in my list, it’s the one who I’ll probably rewatch the least out of all Studio Ghibli. Takahata is truly an incredible director and this film proves that better than any other film of his.

1. Whisper of the Heart (1995) – Talented. Inspiring. Brilliant. Relatable. Amazing. Show-stopping. Spectacular. Never the same. Totally unique. Whisper of the Heart is undoubtedly the best Studio Ghibli film I’ve watched. I enjoyed everything about it to the last details. I didn’t even stop the film to get water even though I was thirsty as hell. That’s how much I loved the film. I never related to characters as much as I related to Shizuku and Seiji. I write and I used to play the violin when I was younger. While I stopped, I still enjoy every story that has something to do with violins. Shizuku was such a normal character that spoke so much to me and to everyone I recommended this film to. Many of us have been in her position where we didn’t know what we’re going to do in the future. While Shizuku had many interests, you could see that she was stuck. I liked that she was inspired by Seiji to see if she could be good at something and she learned that she did have some sort of talent for writing. But just like Seiji’s grandfather, Shiro said about polishing her talent. I think many people, especially people who paint, draw, sing, compose, write and build, should listen to his words. They shouldn’t expect perfection at their first try and that they should give it time and hard work for their skills to become amazing. When I first started to write, I needed to hear Shiro’s words. This film is such a beautiful coming of age story that I think everyone should see no matter the age. Now, let’s go to the romance of the film. Hands down, Shizuku and Seiji are the best romance in Studio Ghibli films. While I love Howl and Sophie and Jiro and Naoko, it’s Shizuku and Seiji that won my heart. They had such a good romantic journey. Their scenes were just astoundingly beautiful, especially the one in the end. When I saw him by the tree, I started to giggle and I always screamed. It was just incredible to watch. Every interaction they had made me love them more. I repeat, the best Studio Ghibli couple. When I finished the film, I wanted to find a guy like Seiji. Too bad we were in lockdown and I was unable to find him. The use of Country Roads was amazing. I always loved the song and now, it’s one of my favourite. What upsets me about this film is the death of its director. If Kondo hadn’t tragically passed away in 1998, I think he would have given us other amazing films like Whisper of the Heart. I can say that this movie whispered in my heart and I’ll never forget it.

#studio ghibli #studio ghibli films #hayao mizayaki #isao takahata #rankings #princess mononoke #my neighbor totoro #spirited away #grave of the fireflies #whisper of the heart

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howdoyousayghibli · 4 years

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When Marnie Was There: A Triumphant Swan Song for Studio Ghibli

In 2013, following the release of The Wind Rises, Hayao Miyazaki announced his retirement from feature films. It didn’t last long, but it did give us one of only a few Studio Ghibli films with neither directing nor screenwriting credit from Miyazaki or Isao Takahata: When Marnie Was There. The other two films with that distinction are Tales from Earthsea and The Cat Returns — an overambitious disaster and a delightful if superficial romp, respectively.

Thankfully, Marnie is neither a disaster nor superficial: it’s a beautiful, true-to-life, emotionally powerful coming-of-age story. Released in 2014 and directed by Hiromasa Yonebayashi, the story centers on young Anna, a withdrawn and melancholic girl who is sent to spend time with her aunt and uncle in the countryside in hopes of ameliorating her asthma.

There, she meets the enigmatic and titular Marnie, who seems to already know Anna and who lives in a mansion that seems to keep flipping from regal and fully-staffed to dilapidated and abandoned. Marnie’s identity and the source of Anna’s woes are equally engaging mysteries that Marnie wisely takes its time unspooling.

While the visuals may not have the wow-factor of Arrietty, Yonebayashi’s stunning directorial debut, Marnie is still a feast for the eyes. What sticks out the most is the depiction of the Kushiro wetlands where Anna spends most of the movie. It inspired such a longing for that kind of natural landscape, in fact, that I literally got up and took my dog for a walk through some nearby woods about ⅔ of the way through this movie. You will want to move to rural Japan; accept this, and keep watching.

The other immediately striking element of Marnie is Anna herself. The movie opens with an internal monologue in which Anna describes how she’s never felt like she belongs; that sentiment has been shared by countless young-adult protagonists, but usually it feels like an afterthought tacked on in service of a bland “Be Yourself!” message.

Marnie actually makes the effort to depict the causes and consequences of that feeling. Fellow introverts will cringe in solidarity as adults make social commitments on Anna’s behalf — right in front of her! — and nod vigorously as Anna flees incoming extroverted strangers to avoid the mortifying ordeal of being known.

But flee all she likes, Anna can’t escape being adopted by a series of friendly, patient extroverts. There’s certainly some conflict in the story, and the movie isn’t shy about letting us see Anna mess up, but by and large Marnie pulls off the magic trick of having emotional resonance without ever really getting unpleasant. Most of the people Anna meets are wonderful, and it’s a pleasure watching her slowly come out of her shell. Studio Ghibli always knocks the side characters out of the park, and Yonebayashi continues the tradition here.

Now, some people might take issue with the statement that Marnie never gets “unpleasant.” What I mean is that there are no Umbridges or Joffreys running around to make you want to throw things, and the characters aren’t punching bags like in Grave of the Fireflies. Marnie does get sad, but it’s a sweet, kind sadness that just makes you want to go upstairs and pick up your sleeping baby and hold her for a bit. I’m going to stop there because I’m writing this at work and really don’t want people to think I’m tearing up over the mushed peas and zoodles recipe I’m supposed to be editing.

There’ll be more on this in the Spoiler Zone, but you should know that Marnie really benefits from being watched twice. It’s that rare mystery trick where the first watch is enriched by the desire to understand, and the second watch is enriched by already knowing. Even if you aren’t in the habit of re-watching films, you won’t be disappointed by a second viewing here.

I adore this movie. The only real flaw — made in all innocence, I believe — is also spoiler-y to talk about, but suffice to say that it is also less of a problem on the second watch. When Marnie Was There is funny, affecting, and beautiful. The future of How Do You Live seems uncertain; if Marnie does turn out to be the last Ghibli film, it would make a fine end for the storied studio.

Up Next: Funny thing — there’s nothing next! At least, as of February 5, 2020, When Marnie Was There is the last movie published by Studio Ghibli. A few years ago, Miyazaki announced that he was un-retiring to direct a new film, How Do You Live; however, the projected release has been continually pushed back, and in a recent interview, Miyazaki stated that the movie was only about 15% finished after years of work.

Barring new Ghibli movies, I’ll likely review some other highly acclaimed anime features — I’ve heard good things about Millennium Actress and Wolf Children. I considered reviewing Ocean Waves, a technically-Studio-Ghibli movie made for TV in the 90s, but I watched it and … it wasn’t great. I didn’t want to end my Ghibli reviews on a down note, so I decided against it. (The short version is that it’s an enemies-to-lovers story that spends 99% of the movie on the “enemies” part.)

For now, I’ll just say thank you for reading. This has been a fun, educational, and fulfilling project for me, and the fact that any of these posts have been liked or shared has been a pleasant surprise. Watch out for one last Spoiler Zone after the image!

SPOILER ZONE

Ok, so, my biggest issue with When Marnie Was There is that, before you know that Marnie is Anna’s grandma’s ghost, the way their interactions are written and animated gives off biiiiiiiiiiiiiig lesbian vibes. The way they talk, when Marnie shows Anna how to row the boat, the dancing, the repeated pleas to keep their relationship a secret, the femme/butch pairing, the blushing .... let’s just say I have several notes from my first watch along the lines of “wow Anna has big Oblivious Lesbian energy” and “surprised to see something this progressive from Studio Ghibli way back in 2014.”

Naturally, I retroactively felt super gross about all that once it clicked that it was a different relationship entirely. Like I said above, this is ameliorated when watching the second time. It’s easier to see how one could interpret it all differently — Anna’s not interested in Marnie romantically, she just literally has never had a friend before and is very overwhelmed by the whole thing. Likewise, Marnie is simply sad to see how withdrawn her granddaughter is and determined to bring her out of her shell.

But yeah, someone really needed to look at the storyboards for this movie and tell Studio Ghibli to tone down the blushing, because in 2020 (and I can’t imagine it came across too differently back in 2014) it reads as a very clearly telegraphed gay romance, and the ick factor when Marnie’s identity is revealed detracts from what is otherwise an extremely sweet, sad, and beautiful story.

Stray Notes:

well it’s been 5 minutes and I’m tearing up at this mom worrying about Anna so much

That title text is … bad

that exploding pumpkin bag shot 👍👍

“He’s a bear” lol

“A witch? Takes one to know one” SOLID BURN DAWG

“Extreme Introvert Gets Adopted by a Series a Extreme Extroverts”

WOW SAD

Aw it’s the first good Ghibli credits song, just in time for their last movie

wait, Hiromasa Yonebayashi was only 36 when he directed Arrietty??

#ghibli #studio ghibli #when marnie was there

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roses-ruby · 5 years

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Cherry Muffins and Lavender Tea

Namjoon x Female Reader

Genre: College AU, Sugary Fluff, Humor if you squint, Smut but it’s ugly, and the teeny tiniest angst

Warnings: curse words, sex, orgasms, oral (female receiving), choking kink, daddy kink, hot biker Namjoon, sex with clothes on, might make you hungry (i’m not sure about everything that’s considered a warning sorry! If there’s something you want me to add, tell me)

Word Count: 8,196

Summary: You’ve got feelings for my man Namjoon, the scary looking dork that drops by where you work. But how will you relay them?

A/N: My first story! Omfgsfkhbifb I’m nervous so please leave a kind word, I’ll love you forever. Might have mistakes cause i’m an idiot. None of this would have been possible without the great @countrysundae she’s my darling and inspiration and I love her sooooo much and you should too!!! Please appreciate her Pisces ass, and send her some love! Oof anyway, please enjoy

10:30

Originally set for 8, 10 fucking 30 is when the bells of your alarm informed you to awake for maybe the 99th time that morning. Groaning in displeasure you move your stiffened muscles to shut the damn thing off. This is a process that’s become a routine; waking up way later than originally planned, no matter how many timers set, or reminders kept. Even though you admit you are sleep deprived constantly, it doesn’t make you a heavy sleeper habitually! You wake up to the tiniest noises at night, from your roommate trying to sneak back into the shared room in ungodly hours of the night to the leaking tap in the bathtub. And yet your phone’s alarm is your placebo-it does absolutely nothing for you.

Though you do try. You keep about 5 alarms on at once, to your roommate’s expense who somehow is both a night owl and early bird all at once. Speaking of which-

“So, the witch finally sees daylight,” snickers Sana

“what the fuc--how long were you there?!” You rasped, grabbing at your erratic heart

“Just got in 5 minutes ago, that was my first alarm and trust me when I say I would’ve strangled you if I heard another.”

It’s true, she’s done it before. Your poor roommate was an occasional victim of your ruthless sleeping habits. You’d sometimes slip into conscious from slumber to hear her whine about your blaring alarms in her own sleeping state. Other times you’d wake up from a pillow landing on your face from a girl who’s had Enough.™ But you didn’t feel too bad for her, since you’ve given her the option of waking you up herself and she’s proven frivolous far too many times for such a simple task. Lowkey? She deserves it.

“Ooh another fun night, huh?” You grin in your sleepy state

Sana giggles “Mhmm, think Mark’s in love with me the poor chap,” she mocks his English accent making you both laugh at yet another fuckboi who’s become a victim to Sana’s lethal looks. Giving her a glance over, from her messy hair and smeared lipstick you conclude she indeed had a very fun night.

Sana came from a well-off background and had it all. Good-looks, smarts, the money, and a very good heart. She didn’t have to go to university, but her mom was not having it. The whole ‘be grateful for the opportunity people suffer to receive’ speech led her here. A parent’s guilt tripping wasn’t something you were unfamiliar with. You considered yourself an average person. Kinda cute, smart, headstrong and half of a pretty good character…Your parents on the other hand, were really wimpy.

“We always thought you’d go to the neighborhood community college”, your dad remarked in horror holding the prestige upper state university’s acceptance letter that arrived recently.

Your dad, who thinks jaded denim vests are cool.

“You’re too young to be living on your own, you’re still a bird who can’t use her wings correctly, not ready to leave the nest!” Said your distressed mom, who’s solution to all bad food was to put more cheese on it.

Don’t like your chicken curry? Pass on the parmesan sprinkler!

You hear the bang of hands on the table and a chair screeches, “let her go, she’ll come back with her tail between her legs”, your little brother who plays fortnite all day and is going through his ‘I hate feelings but secretly cry every night’ faze shouts before storming off towards his room.

All you do is sigh and roll your eyes, picking at your over-parmesaned chicken curry with your naan as your parents continue to nag, cause after this whole fiasco your mind was certainly convinced.

You’re going to the university.

Now that you are here, nothing was easy even for someone as headstrong as you. You were smart enough for a scholarship, but living expenses were something else entirely. Which led you to seek employment at a small café, a few miles from your university. It wasn’t the most bustling of places as it drew in a handful of consumers a day, even your fellow students chose the McDonalds right across the street. Everyone enjoyed the quick coffee and frozen fries, rather than your place’s slightly pricier fresh brews and handmade savory biscuits. Alas, you considerably appreciated the quiet composure your café provided. From the dim soft white lighting, to the 60’s slow jazz-which you routinely exchanged with a Studio Ghibli playlist from YouTube discreetly, blended well together. Gave you time to catchup on your schoolwork. Your boss was a chill 42-year-old who won the lottery a few years back, and let you clock in any time before 12, even if your morning shift began from 9. Maybe it had something to do with how the last waitress quit to work at McDonalds.

And he was always there.

Kim Namjoon. The quiet stud that had captivated your heart without even trying. Also, the fucking reason you wanted to get up earlier in the mornings damn it!

Namjoon was a psychology major who was always reading a new book. Mostly from his favorite author Haruki Murakami. And he always stopped by at the place you worked to indulged them. Parking his Harley-Davidson Softail outside and softly walking in with his old school leather jacket and gloves, ripped jeans, a book in his hand, his huge hard…helmet forgotten on the bike’s handle. He’d gently relay his familiar order of cherry muffins and lavender tea, raking his hair back with those beautiful black gloves, and striding to his usual seat in the back of the café.

He’d grace your presence 3 times a week, usually at 9:30 before his 10 am classes; another early bitch bird. All you wanted to do since then was to be able to take his order.

You had met Namjoon at the beginning of your first semester last year. But he hadn’t harbored much of your attention until that fateful day. Chilly winds and frequent rain were what you were adjusting to, as fall was in its peak with every other color on the leaves a vibrant orange, grabbing at your focus. Having arrived on time for once, you were engaged in your workspace. The co-owner and your co-worker of the small café, the boss’s niece, had taken a day’s leave, and you knew she’d beat your ass if you were late. Tray in hand, you served a bacon quiche and caffé americano to the table refuging a girl in an infinity scarf and glasses who didn’t bother to look up from her phone, when the door chimed open

It’s him again, you thought at the tall stranger you’ve seen around your campus in all black stepping towards the counter. He had small droplets of water on his leather jacket and hair from the rain. You didn’t realize you were staring until he awkwardly looked directly at you, standing with an empty round tray at the side of the table of the occupied girl, who you know is also taking a secret glance at him, and shyly smiles.

Cute.

You walk yourself behind the counter and smile, “hey there”

“Hi, um two cherr-“

“-y muffins and lavender tea, right?”

He nods

“Why don’t you just say the usual?” You laugh, wringing up his order in your old school register

“I didn’t think you’d remember me out of all the customers,” he states bashfully, dimples on display

“‘all the customers?’’ you laugh louder, “we get like 15 a day, I’m sure I’ll remember you”

“Oh, I thought I just came too early”

“You definitely do! I don’t have the energy to get up and comb my hair at 9 in the morning, much less bike to a café for cherry muffins”

“You like it?” he grins “it’s a Harley-Davidson, my dad owned one”

“It’s as pretty as you sweetie,” you don’t know where that confidence was coming from, because you’ve definitely haven’t talked to a boy like this before. Blame it on the chilly weather.

“oh, thank you,” he rakes his leather gloved hands through his hair, looking down at his shoes

Stepping towards your tea station, you grab open the bag of loose organic dried lavender buds, on the shelf above. Picking up a measuring spoon, you scoop and slide in some buds in the French press. You grab the boiling water on the electric stove, next to your station and slowly pour it onto the herbs. You close down the French Press and set a timer for 6 minutes.

Taking a breath, you look around the café. Namjoon stands there as towering as a tree, looking at his book, ‘Women who Run with the Wolves.’ Most people would go sit down if it wasn’t pickup, but he always stood right at the registrar. Strange. Unsurprisingly, you remember being intimidated as hell in the beginning. Usually people that come to the café are chill in the ‘harmless millennial hippie’ type of way, dressing themselves in mutable colors. But he looked like he would yell if you even slightly messed up his order or gave a ‘wrong look’ to his bike. You loosened up when his order was always so easy, and his book choices always so cute. You almost bust out laughing when he came in with ‘A fault in our stars;’ especially when he sat at his table with glossy eyes, trying to finish the last pages. His smile also melted all worries away.

Infinity scarf girl gets up to leave (but not before giving Namjoon a longing look), leaving you both alone in the balance of your heartbeats. There was slow piano from Kiki’s delivery service filling up your café’s background. The weather still faintly drizzling, the soft gray clouds seeping through the broad windows, making the café’s wooden brown hues a tad bit dimmer, yet the fairy lights radiant. Pedestrians with transparent umbrellas in beige coats and red hats pass by every so often, not a care in the world. Smells of fresh scones and cinnamon filled your nostrils, making you remember holiday nights at home. Though your thoughts often redirected themselves towards the handsome stranger and the harmony of the quiet fall day.

The timer dings and you get back on track, using the handle to press the floating buds down to the bottom of your French press. You head toward the counter’s display case. Below is a steel countertop with coffee/tea cups, silverware, small plates, trays and a set of tongs. You grab a cup and plate, fixing them properly you pour the tea. The steam drifts towards your face, an amazing aroma that complimented the purple complexion of your brew. Grabbing a set of tongs, you take out two large cherry muffins, placing them on a tray, along with the tea. You decide to grab a chocolate chip cookie as well from one of the clear cookie jars set on the wooden crown of the display case.

“Here ya go,” you place the tray in front of him. He places his book and gloves onto the tray and gets out his wallet from his beautifulbooty back pocket. After paying he picks up the tray and halts

“Cookie?” He holds up the chocolate chip cookie in his hand, a bit confused

“It’s on the house, they’re the best thing in the café, but I end up eating most of them, so might as well give ‘em out”

He smiles, “thank you, it looks delicious”

“No problem, anything for our loyal customers,” you both laugh, “it’s beautiful out today”

“Hm, not as much as you,” he states, walking away from you towards his usual seat. Now, he turned around very quickly after he said that, so you didn’t really get to see his face after such cheesy words, but the tips of his ears were red. Oh.

He’s cute cute.

Stunned, you stand there for a moment or two, just wide-eyed; staring at nothing, until you spin on your spot and head back into the tea vicinity of the café. You feel your heartrate rise and alarms go off in your head. But not the loud intrusive kind. The kind where a baker knows his three-layered chocolate fudge cake is ready. The ones where a mom takes freshly baked cinnamon rolls out in the morning. The ones when the apple pie is prepared to be sliced. Those kinds. Covering your extremely warm face with your hands, you muffle a squeal.

Since then, you’ve started paying close attention to Kim Namjoon.

You didn’t know what it was, his tall broad frame and long thick legs, which you wanted to be choked with. His large hands in those chunky leather gloves or when he took them off, to handle the pages of his book delicately; his long skinny fingers would graze over the soft wood, both things you wanted to be choked with. Or his keen eyes that would get larger or darker depending on what part of the book he was reading, and you imagined in which manner they would present themselves with while he’s choking y-Ok. Ok. Ok. You had a kink. Endeared was how you felt at his intimidating appearance.

You also adored how far away from intimidating he actually was. You were smitten with his gentle demeanor in dealing with people. His pacifist nature, and how much he loved tiny crabs, how he was so respectful towards everyone, younger or older, never judging anyone’s appearance or his love for characters that’re as large, and clumsy as him, like Ryan from that Kakaotalk app. And his laughed that carried large amounts of joy over cheesy, silly things ultimately making you laugh as well.

You were sure you loved Kim Namjoon, yet you barely spoke to him-

I mean who’s gonna disturb a huge scary-looking dork when he’s trying to read? Certainly not you. What you desired is a way to get close to him somehow, and for that you needed to know more about him. It wasn’t hard to pick up gossip though, when you were friends with the loudest chatter mouth on the planet.

You told Sana once about your silly crush and she shrieked so hard it sounded like a howl. The next day she had all the deets on who she referred to as ‘Hunkjoon.’ He had an IQ of 148, he hates seafood, he’s so clumsy that his friends refer to him as ‘the god of destruction,’ favorite color is black (no duh), he’s well-known, terribly smart, and to your dismay, associated with the exceedingly popular frat boys Jung Hoseok and Kim Seokjin.

Ugh

Jung Hoseok and Kim Seokjin, or who you so kindly referred to as the Seokbitches, were the schools James Dean. ‘Icon of teenage disillusionment.’ Hehe, perfect definition by google. They were notorious, for playing ghosts in their classes, throwing a party every.single.damn.day., never keeping their dick™ in their pants, and having the most obnoxious laughs on the earth…

Ok, so maybe only you knew them for that. To others they were the teenage love and rebellion dream, James Dean. They never attended classes, because they were fuckthesystem peeps, threw a party everyday so the poor souls stuck in an endless cycle of capitalist warfare aka their fellow students could enjoy the more fun things life has to offer, indulged in every part of youth-including the 24/7 horny part, and had the most beautiful laughs in the damn planet.

How were they Namjoon’s closest friends…How? Anyone with a functioning brain can tell the vast difference between the trinity. Namjoon attended all his classes (yet fate didn’t give you a class with him, the bitch), he actually read books, and he wasn’t hooking up with 2-3 girls every night, unlike certain people.

You heard from a classmate a while back that ‘bout two years ago Namjoon had a serious girlfriend. Since their breakup, he hasn’t been with anyone else. It’s good that he’s single but you’ve still only talked to him here and there. A few shy glances, a few awkward touches. Nothing more, but lord do you want more, alot more. What if a girl more daring gets him first? Do you really need angst in your life? NO! but you are still at a loss of what to do. You had one boyfriend so far, and it was one of your worst experiences.

The guy was a total creep. And the worst part? You asked him out. All your friends had relationships and he was someone who rode the bus with you, making you laugh here and there. So, being the usual teenager, you thought it’d be a good idea to date him, like a fool. Who knew he wasn’t just being charming, and making fun of people (trying to be edgy as you now know) was a hobby for him? You did. Right after you overheard him announce the fact that you look like a winged bat when you suck dick just to make his jerk-ass friends laugh. It was so humiliating, as you never did something of the sorts with him, yet his friends would stick out their teeth in a ‘vampire like manner’ whenever they passed you in the hallway, as well as your first heartbreak. You got him back by filling his locker with Limburger cheese, from your mom’s collection of cheeses. His gym clothes smelled for a month, and people called him cheeseboi for the rest of the year.

You shed your blind innocence that day and knew that men are trash. Namjoon isn’t like that though, and you’re surer of that than anything. He’s special for you and you want to be the special one for him. Sadly, you just didn’t know how to start a conversation with Namjoon, without looking like you jumped in boiling water. I mean you had hook-ups in college. Who doesn’t play around here and there? But fuck-this is definitely the first time you actually like someone. Like really like them, so you just clam up and don’t know what to do. That’s where you are today.

You bounce from your bed, heading towards the bathroom. “I’m late again,” you mumble.

Sana hears that (at this point she could have better hearing than dogs)

“Hunkjoon, huh?”

“That’s not his name Sasha”

“Listen, why do you even spend your time trying to get with him in that boring café?” Sana shouts, hopping off her bed she makes her way to the bathroom and throws her hands around you who’s brushing her teeth. “You should ask him out, maybe to a club. A little booty popping, ear sucking, mouth licking, and he’s yours”

“Please don’t ever use any of those words in that way ever again.”

“I’m serious!” Exasperated she throws her hands in the air before resting them on each of your shoulders together and squeezes you. “You just need a change of scenery, that place is no hook-up central for us modern kids. Just one party, and he’ll be all over you.” You tug her off your back and narrow your eyes-looking at her through the mirror; you continue to brush your teeth. She knows you want something far from a hookup with Namjoon, yet she-

“And then,” she smirks, “maybe your mouth would be full of his cum-not toothpaste”

You choke.

“Sana what the fuck,” you rage running after the laughing vixen with your toothbrush as a makeshift knife

“Don’t act like it’s not what you want!” She cackles as you tackle her onto the bed ready to stab her eyes out when your phone rings. Oh shit. You know exactly who that is. Picking it up, you run to the bathroom, spitting out your toothpaste

“H-h-hello?”

“Where. in. Jesus’s. name. are. you?!”

“O-oh, coming Linda, I’m in traffic” Sana proceeds to imitate a car beep sound at that-“and I’ll be there in 5 minutes!”

“If you aren’t, I’ll personally serve your head as our main dish this afternoon!” She screeches before hanging up

“Shit,” you catch your breath, “I gotta go,” scrambling around, you find something appropriate to wear in late April weather. You brush your hair in a hurry and throw on a high ponytail. Sana just watches you the whole time, staring at you up on her elbows from her bed looking deep in thought. Grabbing one of Sana’s car keys and your purse, you rush out the door with a quick bye to Sana. She doesn’t reply back but after you are out the door she flings back onto her bed, arms expanded.

“I’ll ask Hobi,” she says to herself

Parking in the small lot behind the café, you run inside the back door. You gather yourself, fixing your hair and your fast heartbeat, you wrap on an apron and head to the front.

Linda spots you right away.

“You’re late,” she grits

“Yeah, traffic sucks,” you grin awkwardly, praying she’ll believe you.

“Just get to work, the pound cakes are almost ready to take out,” she points toward the oven. You nod, heading into the vicinity of the oven in the back next to the stove.

“Hey Linda,” someone shouts making you turn, “the person at table 3 wants some sourdough starter”

Linda acknowledges, moving into the back storage where the starters where kept.

You spot a girl. A new girl. A very very pretty girl, with long light brown hair up to her waist, and a delicate body. She meets your eyes and smiles and you return the gesture before looking away like you didn’t momentarily become gay looking at her soft features.

It’s good to have her around, you conclude. Usually you worked the morning shift with Linda 3 times a week, taking afternoon classes during those days. (coincidently when Namjoon comes by) You know there’s a girl who works the afternoon shift, but you never really ran into her. And since you do come late 1 out of 3 times, Linda ends up doing most of the work herself, including making all the café’s delicacies. You’re so very thankful to Linda and her uncle for not firing you, and very glad that Linda has some actual help now.

You’re pulled from your thoughts when the oven timer dings and the door chimes open.

The new girl greets the customer cheerily while you concentrate on taking an enticing whiff of the vanilla pound cakes, about to pull open the oven’s door when you stop dead in your tracks. You’d recognize that deep voice anywhere.

Turning your head so fast, you feel your neck burn from whiplash you spot your Namjoon finishing his order to your co-worker. He meets your eyes for a moment, and god you’re sure you look like a fish.

“Would you like anything else? We have really good chocolate chip cookies,” pipes the newcomer

“I know, they’re delicious,” he catches your eyes again, “but no thank you, not this time”

“Aww, well I love them a bit too much. Even though I’m new I’ve had quite a few,” she starts ringing up his order

“I thought I haven’t seen you around here”

“Moved in recently and kinda have trouble unpacking…I need a stronger body ya’know”

“Is that so,” Namjoon quirks a brow and you feel like you’ll throw up. Why is Namjoon late? Catch 22 didn’t seem like his style of book? Why the fuck is she giggling so much? Who let her steal all your cookies? And why is his hair so much messier than usual? He looks so cute omg?... What’s that burning smell?

…Shit

You gawk at the oven in horror as Linda shouts your name from a mile away.

Sana’s scrolling through her phone on her tummy when you bonk her head with your purse

“Ow, what the fuck-”

“When’s the next frat fiasco? I need to relive some stress”

She smiles, “I knew you’d come around, and that’s why I went ahead and asked Hobi to bring Hunkjoon tonight.”

You beam at the mention, “Sana you angel!” Then immediately scowl, “Wait at a seokbitch party? Just fucking great”

“Don’t be so sour,” Sana sighs, sitting up, “Namjoon doesn’t go to many parties anyway so his best friend was the only solid way to bring him.”

Giving it a thought, you beam again, jumping on Sana

“Sana you angel!”

“Whatever’s up with your hair by the way, looks like you’ve been pulling on it.”

“Don’t ask…long day.”

Arriving at the party, you grimace at the smoke of marijuana blanketing you as soon as you enter.

“Alright, Hobi should be around here somewhere,” Sana looks around,” standing on the tippy toes of her heels, trying to look past the frisky bodies, but it’s of no use with the amount of people in the room.

The room was packed with tipsy children. There was barely any elbow space even though the frat house was huge as you and Sana squeezed through hot, sweaty dancing bodies. Some unbalanced drunkards clumsily pushing into you every now and then and you wondered how anyone came to these things. It’s hot, and everyone smelled of axe and sweat. Parties would be much better with just a modest group of people you know, or maybe that’s the small-town girl in you speaking.

No! You cringed internally. You must forget about your outdated methods and passive behavior. Tonight, you will become someone completely new. Someone who takes action.

“Oh there!” Sana shouts over the music, waving furiously to someone by the stairs

Soon after you hear the jubilant voice of Jung Hoseok as he comes into view to greet Sana with a hug, and after being temporarily blinded by his smile you give him a once over or call that twice, because fuck He looked good in a simple white tee, tight blue jeans, dark brown Timberlands and his hair pushed up with what seemed like some gel and messy fingers (think back to Gayo Daejejeon 2018 mic drop)

“This is the girl I was telling you about,” Sana points at you

Hoseok joins in on your shameless gawking and grins

Embodying you was a baby pink thin strapped mini dress, and when you say mini, you mean your black Chantelle Présage lace thong is showing mini, but you’re a woman on a mission, and you didn’t care if you were naked at this point. Your hair was thoroughly straightened, and you went for a glossy cherry makeup look, courtesy of Sana. You weren’t trying to look like a cherry muffin, buuuut you didn’t mind if that’s what people thought, specifically one person.

“It’s nice to meet you,” he extends his hand, eyes duskier than a moment ago

You should wear shades in front of him or you’re sure you’ll go blind.

You shake his hand and give him one of your most forced friendly smiles, trying not to make much conversation as you just wanted one thing. Though that shiver upon your spine at his grip tells you otherwise.

Hoseok motions for you both to follow him and you pick his trail

Sana elbows you

“We talked about this! You’re supposed to be acting like a lamb, ready to be jumped on at any time, not a fox,” she whispers at your obvious display of wanting nothing to do with the Hyena

“I’m being nice! I am! This is how I’m nice!”

Sana rolls her eyes, and you sulk. It’s not your fault she is a master seductress, and you just don’t know how to be kind to the guy who’s trying to undress you with his eyes when he knows you’re here for his friend. She told you two things about seducing men, act completely incompetent and laugh at all their lame jokes. The more you feed a guy’s concocted ego, the more you feed his desire for you. And well, a way to the man’s heart is through feeding him…or something right?

But all your thoughts disappear into nothing once you lay eyes upon the man you’ve been wanting for almost a year.

Kim Namjoon, holy fuck.

Never has a loose black tee and oversized maroon velvet bomber’s jacket looked that good on anyone before. He commands your undivided attention with that low-neck line and gelled up hair. Healthy, glowing skin spread out like a canvas. His jeans ripped in all the beautiful places around the man’s thick, strong thighs, and black derby’s? Classic, yet defiant as always. He was fucking beautiful and you were awestruck. Hoseok says something to the group of 3 guys standing by the back sofa, including Namjoon, most likely about you, but you don’t hear anything once Namjoon locks eyes with you. There’s evident surprise in his eyes, which dims into concentration at the dress you’re wearing.

“So Namjoon,” Hoseok interrupts your thoughts, “I heard you both’ve met before?”

Namjoon doesn’t break away from you for a moment, smiling slightly “we’ve met, it’s nice to see you here”

He was being strangely vague. “You too,” you mutter

You could physically feel Sana scoff at the virginity act.

“Alright, I can use a drink-Ali, Jason, Sana let’s go get them”, Hoseok works fast to evade the intrusive attention on the both of you

“Why do you need 3 people to help you with drinks”, says a confused Jason

Flustered at the man’s impaired ability to read between the lines Hoseok scrambles for another excuse, “um…uh, I don’t know what you want? And uh there’s a lot of people, so uh”

Jason stubborn as ever quirks, “well I can just tell you what I wan-”

“JASON! ALI!” Sana shouts and everyone, aside from Namjoon, who won’t turn away from you, glances at her, “be a darling and pour my drink for me,” she uses her sultry voice, throws a sly smile, and they all get led away by her, even Hoseok, looking hypnotized

Watching them walk away you let out a sigh. This is it. This is your moment. You really should’ve had a shot before this. Drunk you wouldn’t clam up and clench her buttocks that sober you is doing for some reason. Clearing your throat, you start blurting out the first forms of conversation that settles in your mind.

“Nice to see you here, finally away from the café-not that I don’t like seeing you there…I mean I do, but this is nice too hehe”

You mentally slap yourself for the worst beginning. When have you ever been this quiet? Sana couldn’t get you or your alarm to shut up most of the time and this is the moment you choose to get awkward? Maybe this is it. He’ll just walk away now and you can wallow in self-pity.

“It’s great to see you too, out of that café…not that I don’t like it as well” he smiles

Your whole form relaxes, and you feel the knot of pressure in your back coming undone. You know you’re overthinking, know that your mind is self-sabotaging you, so it can get out of this hellhole back into its safe space between your bedsheets. So, you take a breath and focus on his eyes, trying to bring back the confidence of an 80’s café waitress. “You got yelled at pretty hard this morning, were you ok?” He asks

“Oh, don’t worry about that. I kinda deserved it and Linda’s the biggest sweetheart, she would never actually hurt me.” Minus where she almost tore your hair out in the backroom

“…speaking of which, why were you late this morning?” You slapped yourself again

He gave you a look. Shit. “You track me?” he grins

“No-no, nonono…n-yes. I track all my customers”, you smile awkwardly, “they keep me on my toes ya’ know the little bastards” If only you could forever tape your mouth

It was a bad joke but he lets out a chuckle where his eyes turn into little crescents and his dimples poke through his skin

“Well, I missed my alarm this morning, so I was too late to arrive on time…but I still wanted to come…”

“…Why?”

“I just,” he stares at you, “did”

“I see. It’s our tea isn’t it.”

Both of you share a laugh

“You look beautiful by the way”

“This little thing?” you twirl your hips, “just found this in the back of my closet”

The brag was true because you never fucking dressed up for anything, yet always shop like you do.

When you look at him again, you see his eyes dark at the move you just did, which you’re sure exposed your ass

Gathering courage, you start walking toward and up the stairs not giving Namjoon another glance. You could feel his bewilderment through your exposed back, as he follows you like a lost puppy. You hide a smile. Heading into an open room, you find its balcony. Outside, the spring wind picks up your hair and you take in a deep breath, letting go of all your nerves that tense up once you feel the balcony door open and close and the presence of another person in the little island.

“Are you alright?” You feel his breath on you, and you barricade a shudder

“I’m fine…I just couldn’t breathe in there with all the weed,” you turn and smile at him.

“I hate it too,” He smiles back

There’s a moment before you both break eye contact and he’s stepping up beside you

Looking out from the balcony, you pander in the serenity of the dark night and silent winds. The music is still mutely conscious in both your eardrums, as well as the laughter of kids who came here to forget tomorrow. There’s always a calmness you feel with him, no matter the weather or locality. The tips of your arms are touching and the barring heat your entire left side simmers in provides you with the translation of your need to be closer with him.

“I’m sorry I’m not good at small talk”

You turn your face to him as he takes a breath before speaking again

“I’m very awkward, sorry about that”

“You aren’t the one who’s awkward, you raise a brow, I’ve been making bad jokes all night. And well, who’s good at things like small talk?”

He smiles at you, “Your jokes aren’t bad,” he says bringing his face closer to yours, “and I love hearing you talk”

“Thank you” There’s another silence before you ask, “started a new book recently?’

“I did!” He quirks, “‘Yellow Wallpaper’ by Charlotte Perkins Gilman, it’s disturbing yet addictive. Like an Edgar Allen type you know. The increasing dread creates a form of suspense, which feels like a drug. Even though you can tell the ending won’t be good, you carry on led by a strange empathy as if you’ve become the character and it-“

Namjoon stops suddenly and stares at you smiling. “Um…sorry I got carried away, I’m probably boring you”

“Nuh-uh” you stop him immediately, “You aren’t boring at all. I love hearing you talk”

There’s a radiant blush on his cheek as red as your cherry lips, and you just want to devour him. “When I,” he begins looking away, “When I come to the café, you always seem so interested in what I’m reading. Most people don’t really care about that from me. They care that I ride bikes or about my popular friends. Not that I mind. I’m fine keeping them on a surface level. But,” He looks at you, “I want to know you better.”

“Me too” you blurt out very quickly

Your faces are so adjacent you can smell his soft mint toothpaste from his steady breathing. He’s staring at your glossy lips, your whole form is covered with his warmth, fluttering your senses leisurely

“Want a taste,” you whisper just for him to hear

“I bet it’s as delicious as it looks,” he lets out a heavy breath

“Well lucky you cause tonight I’m serving them specially for you”

You close the distance between your mouths and take in his plump lips. It wasn’t rushed, yet it wasn’t slow. It felt like the most perfect kind of kiss in the silent spring, the one that’s described in timeless romance novels. The one that you tell your children to look for, if they’re fortunate enough in their youth. That they’ll know it’s from the one.

He brings his hand upon your cheek and rubs it tenderly with his thumb. You both move back and stare in each other’s eyes.

“Well…was it delicious?”

“Better than cherry muffins,” he licks his lips to taste your cherry gloss on them

You crinkle your eyes to cringe and giggle

“You’re so cute,” he says and he’s kissing you again

This time he slips his tongue in your mouth and you hum in content, grabbing at the back of his blonde hair. Your tongues dance wildly, and Namjoon reaches for every nook and cranny of your wet cavern. Immoral sounds are escaping you both as your closed eyes burn in delight. Putting your legs on each side of his torso, he hurriedly picks you up from under your thighs and easily carries you inside the room, towards the bed.

You both break off as soon as he lands your bodies on the spring. His body still contains the heat from your thighs, and he’s pressed so close to you, you can feel your nipples against his rock-hard chest as well as the tent in his jeans. Breathing heavily, you stare in his starry eyes, filled with so much lust it feels like they’re dripping.

With a shaky breath you try to melt his lips onto yours again, just for him to shift back.

“Do you want this?” He asks, determined to move off if you refuse him

That would be a sin. “Yes.” You speak clearly, “I always wanted you, since I first saw you, Namjoon.”

“Fuck,” he whispers, before he’s on you again like the kindest, warmest deity he is.

He’s back into exploring your mouth as your hands find their home roaming his broad back. As he moves his hips up and down your wet entrance, a heat shoots up through your spine. His hands are kneading your ass, and everything is moving in slow motion for what feels like forever. Breaking off your mouth, he moves his kisses along your neck down to your cleavage, sucking hickeys on sensitive areas you moaned around. Growling at the invasive flimsy fabric surrounding your chest, he begins to tear it apart. His hands pulled down your transparent bra. You gasp at the intrusion of air surrounding your upper body.

“Mmm, fuck yes baby,” you could feel yourself soaking his cloth covered crotch as you fuck yourself upon his restricted dick.

Namjoon smirks reaching towards your back to take off your bra, letting his warm fingers tickle your skin as you lift your back to help him remove it and discard it to the side. Namjoon takes you in, caressing your face and you feel like he’s going to compliment you before he’s spitting words in your ear

“You little slut, you came here just to be fucked didn’t you”

Flustered you splutter, “Yes, ah please”

“That’s yes daddy for you baby,” he uses his large fingers to take hair off your face and removes his jacket and shirt

“Yes daddy, please,” you eye his tan muscles and broad chest. He noses your jaw and takes his mouth around your areola. You immediately run a hand through his golden locks, your mouth hangs open as he flicks your nipple with his tongue. Around his arms was sunken skin, in the form of muscles and you run your hands through every cervix.

Your breathing is labored

He moves back, moving your thong slightly to the right as he dips two fingers into you,

“Drenched and shameless muffin,” he mutters scissoring your entrance slightly, staring at you darkly

You are sprawled out for him like an unwrapped muffin. One leg hangs off the bed, while the other is desperately wrapped around his torso as if you’re scared he’ll leave. Your breasts are exposed and wet with saliva, and you’ve just handed him your cunt for the taking. You’re high off his soft sandalwood scent, as he takes your chest in his large hand, rolling your nipple in his thumb and index finger, pulling it slightly. His fingers are wet from your juices and you’re embarrassed you’re this wet. Vulnerable, you shut your eyes and look away before he grabs your cheeks with his hand and brings your face back towards him, hitting a certain spot that has you arching your back and knitting your brows.

“Don’t close your eyes baby girl, I need your focus completely on me”

“Then no more teasing,” you pout

Namjoon chuckles as he brings his fingers dripping with your silk into his mouth; looking straight into your soul he licks around his fingers in the lewdest way possible. “Sweeter than cherries” he mutters, slowly unraveling your wrapped leg and caresses the inside of your wet thigh, never letting go as if reassuring you that he’s right here. Languidly, he noses down your navel and further below until he’s lined with your aching core

“Daddy” you whimper

Giving you kitten licks around your folds, he licks a long strip before placing his tongue slightly inside your walls and suckles your juices. Your legs were on each side of his head, and you pulled at his hair out of frustration. The higher your voice went, the more he licked, bringing his tongue around your bundle of nerves and gently rolling the nub around. His hands traveled from your thighs to your waist, and slowly towards your breasts and kneaded. He flattened his tongue against your folds again, to take a finer taste of you, as he hummed knowing you were close. He took his right hand off your chest and used it to slide two fingers into your inner depths.

His mouth then went back to your clit, slowly rolling it around his tongue in a circular motion as his fingers drilled into you faster and faster. You let out a string of curses as your thighs began to shake, and the knot in your stomach becoming undone. You came with a yelp as your eyes began to see stars and vision whitened.

All your sudden adrenaline left you and your limbs limped onto the bed, fingers no longer in Namjoon’s hair. Letting out heavy breaths you saw Namjoon slowly coming out of your legs to face you. His thick lips were wet with your juices, and he licked through them and smiled.

“You’re so beautiful baby girl,” he said before kissing you again. Your tongues danced through your exhaustion, and you moved your hand towards his hard on. You felt him hiss into your mouth as you slowly rubbed him through his jeans. Backing off his mouth you smiled, it’s your turn daddy, and undid his zipper. You felt his hard dick in your hand, blessed in length. Spreading precum around his shaft, you watched him twist his expression. He reached into his back pocket and took out a condom, tearing off the wrapper with his teeth and handing it to you.

You gave him a smile as you rolled the condom onto his length and lined it with your entrance-giving him a hand job as he gradually moved into you. Once he was fully sheathed, he took a moment, before pulling out a slamming into you again

You let out a gasp at his pace, still a bit sensitive from your last orgasm. He was relentless and pounded into you over and over again, as the whole bed shook at his force.

“F-fuck dadd-y ooh” you cried as the same knot appeared inside your stomach. You grabbed his hand on the side of your head and brought it up to your face to give it a kiss. Light headed from the force of his thrusts, you could still feel him looking at you as you brought his hand upon your neck and laid it out flat

He cursed at your submission, and lightly put pressure on your neck “You’re such a good girl, daddy’s good girl, good girl fuck,” his paced faltered and you could feel your orgasm approaching with the pressure around your neck. With his other hand he stimulated your clitoris and that’s all it took to have you cuming once again.

Your mind travels back to how much you’ve wanted this-wanted him. His strong arms are no longer hidden under his bulky jacket, his fingers no longer clean with traces of paper fiber, but with your juices. How the hands you’ve wanted for so long around your neck, the eyes you waited to be filled with just you, the moans you suffered to hear from his luscious lips. It’s all happening. It’s all yours and no amount of overthinking will take this away.

With a few more thrusts he reached his own peak with a grunt, flopping down on you shortly afterward. You could feel his heavy, hot breathing on your neck and you wrapped your hands around him. You take a few more huffs before talking to him.

“I really like you” you whisper

“So I’ve heard,” he chuckles moving off you, he picks you up to move you upright in the bed with your head on the pillow and your arms still around him. He lays down next to you. “I’m not going anywhere baby. I really like you too. You didn’t really think I came for the tea did you”

Your heart soars and you meet his dimpled smile, He looks so youthful with his after sex glow, “Hey I make that tea with a lot of love and care!”

“Right, I’m sorry,” he laughs

“I didn’t know you liked me, your head is always in your books”

“Well originally, I came to chill and read. Until I found the cutest waitress that makes amazing tea-“

“-Shut up,” you jab him with a giggle

“-and I didn’t want to seem creepy, so I just payed attention to my books. But I did try to talk to you. I would stand as still as a tree next to the registrar trying to think of something to say. You tended to look intimidated of me, so I always froze up and just sat down. I asked my friends how to talk to you, and they kept giving me strange advice. I don’t think they know how to get a girl without sexual innuendos. They didn’t know how you looked, just knew you as café girl. If Hoseok found out you were café girl tonight, he’d probably try and do something stupid”

You took in the information he gave you and put the puzzle pieces together. You both were huge overthinking dorks. “I was only intimidated in the beginning,” you begin, “even if I was I still found you hot and probably would’ve jumped on your dick had you asked”

He suppresses some coughs while turning red

Smirking you lead him on, “Oh, so you’re shy now but wanted me to call you daddy just a few minutes ago”

“T-that’s” he begins, and you laugh out loud thinking this is definitely your Namjoon

“What about your choking kink? That was cute and unexpected” he gives you a sly grin

“Wait, shut u-that’s not…it’s your fault with those leather gloves, and leather jackets”

You poke his dimple out of mock anger and he tickles you. The rest of the time is spent by talking out your feelings, your dreams, favorite books, and desserts until you both fall asleep in each other’s arms.

You wake up by what you believe is your alarm. Opening your groggy eyes, you look up towards the ceiling of a room that wasn’t yours. After a minute more in conscious you realize it’s not your alarm ringing, but a pounding residing from the closed door of the stranger’s room.

“Can you guys please give me my room back now,” shouts a frustrated Hoseok

That’s when you remember the nights events and look at a sleepy Namjoon next to you. After checking the time of 7:41 shining through the digital clock on the nightstand next to what you now know as Hoseok’s bed, you smile and cuddle up to the warm body.

“Go away Hoseok,” Namjoon groans, “My baby’s trying to sleep.”

Both of you ignore Hoseok’s whines of protest as you whisper to Namjoon

“It’s fine, I’m glad he’s here so I can get to work on time for once. My alarm never wakes me up”

“Babe don’t worry, from now on I’ll be your personal alarm. As long as you can be my cherry muffin”

“I’ll do you one better and make one for you at the café”

“Those cherry muffins taste good,” he looks at you, “but you taste better,” and winks

You giggle until you hear the disturbed voice of Jung Hoseok behind the door,

“You guys are disgusting and have no idea how to whisper”

...

“GET OUT OF MY ROOM”

#Bts #Namjoon #Bts fanfiction #Bts fluff #Bts smut #Namjoon fluff #Namjoon smut #RM #Kim Namjoon #R:CMLT

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dxmedstudent · 5 years

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Heya hope you’re doing well! For the end of year asks, 1 and 24?

I’m doing OK! I keep forgetting to post this, or adding onto it. But I don’t want it to be lost whenever my browser next crashes. So, let’s post this!@meanwhileonwednesday also asked me to answer them all, so I’m gonna combine both.

1) what did you learn about yourself this year?

I learned a lot about myself. I underwent some careers counselling, which has been an itneresting ride, and given me lots of tools to reflect on what I want out of work. It’s hard, because I realised that I (and probably all of us) tolerate so many working conditions that I don’t inherently like or flourish under. I like to take my time on one problem at a time; in medicine you’re being constantly interrupted by like 10 different people who then remind you multiple times about the thing you were doing til someone else interrupted you, and constantly re-jigging your to-do list to accommodate changes in urgency. I realised I like to make people feel better even more than I like to ‘fix’ things. I realised that the reality of what work in a busy hospital is like completely colours my perception of specialties; I can’t unsee the kinds of shifts I’ve had to work. It gave me a lot of food for thought, and I hope it helps me pick something I’m happy with. And having started dating again towards the end of the year, I’ve had to think a lot about who I really am, and what I really want or need. It’s not easy shining an honest light on yourself; what you realise isn’t always flattering (I don’t often spend enough time doing non-work related things, and I’m too much of an introvert for most people, probably). But this allows you to be honest about what would make you happy; for example, I’d hever chase some guy who loves to go clubbing on a regular basis, because we’d be spending every evening apart.

2) best moment of the year?

I don’t know. There were lots of litle modest ‘best moments’, but I’m not sure I can thing of any one big thing.

3) worst moment of the year?

Burnout Time wasn’t a moment, but it wasn’t a good time in general. I’m going to vote it number 1. Though it has some stiff competition. I’ll stick to just one, because nobody wants to read a long list of sad things.

4) what was the biggest change you experienced this year?

I realised that I wouldn’t let training and medicine destroy me. Not that I planned to before, but there’s a lot of fear and anxiety at every stage of the game in medicine. You spend med school anxious in case they kick you out. You spend foundation training anxious in case you kill someone or they kick you out. Then you finish that part of your training, and start the next and its... more of the same? And when you struggle and feel bad, so often your first thought isn’t “I feel horrible, this is bad for me and I need help” but “as long as I am functional at work, then it’s OK as long as they don’t kick me out”. But that doesn’t help you get better, it only piles more pressure on you when you need help. It turns out that I discovered they don’t kick you out of training as easily as my darkest thoughts imagined. But it made me realise I could never let this job destroy me; there is so much to live for and enjoy outside of medicine. There are so many other ways to be happy.

5) best song of the year?

Aah I’ve listened to so many songs over the course of a year, how could you pick one. I’d blatantly favour the ones I obsessed over most recently. Hmm. I listened to Vitali’s Chaconne on a loop when revising, so let’s go with that.

6) best album of the year?

I rarely listen to entire albums, because I tend to discover songs randomly and individually. But I loved that my friend and I discovered we both loved Indila’s music really randomly.

7) what’s one thing that happened this year that you want to change?

Towards the end of the year, I had to take a break from making and posting comics. Between burnout and work things, I just didn’t have the time, energy or inspiration to give it what it needed. I hope to get back into it this year; I really miss making my comic.

8) best book/book series of the year?

I’m gonna vote Good Omens. I know people joke about something curing their depression. But yeah, it sort of did with me. It made me see the light at a difficult time, and despite all the stress and sadness and numbness I was going through, it made me laugh and feel joy and appreciate what words could do again. It rekindled a light that had burned very low, and I’m forever grateful for that; it holds a special place in my heart now.

9) best television series?

Hard for me to pick one. I’m watching The Dragon Prince right now, and it’s great! Reminds me of ATLA in the best ways. Honourable mention to Cells at Work for combining three of my interests (medicine, anime and cute things) into one.

10) how was your love life this year?

I actually bothered to try to have one! Only toward the end of the year, though, so we’re on baby steps right now. I’ve talked to and met a few interesting people, even ones that I couldn’t pursue anything further with. I’ve also read like a million really bad profiles, had way too many half-assed messages and conversations.

I hate the initial bit, where you should try to be yourself and need to be open and vulnerable to really getting to know people, but equally people can just drop out of talking with you or dating you just like that. It’s something much easier to do when you meet online and don’t know each other than when you meet at uni, and I certainly seem to see it a lot more now in online dating than meeting people IRL. Where you get dumped or dump someone but you at least have s a sense of completion. I don’t like how easily the mind wanders over to ‘damn it, he’s ghosted me’ If someone doesn’t reply for a few days, but then again, the fact that lots of people do just ghost doesn’t help that.Still, I remind myself that there’s no use worrying about it; if someone will dump you or isn’t right for you, then there’s nothing you can do to change it.

There are some nice people out there, and I’m interested to see where it goes. Hopefully without too much anxiety, preoccupation or heartbreak on the way; that was one part of dating that I absolutely did not miss in my single carefree years.

11) what made you cry the most this year?

I find it hard to quantify what made me cry the most; I had a lot of tough times.

Actually, no, on second thought, I think I know what made me cry the most; PMS. Hands-down the winner. What a menace; it’s a real pain. Would not recommend PMS as an experience to those of you unfamiliar with it.

12) biggest regret of the year?

I try not to look back and regret things. I don’t want to say I regret burning out, because frankly that isn’t a choice I made, so I don’t feel bad about it. It’s unfortunate that it’s made my life a bit more complicated, but it’s manageable. So I try not to dwell on that or regret it.

I feel sad that I put my comic on hiatus, because I managed to balance it through so many tough times, so pausing kind of felt like admitting defeat, or losing a part of myself. But it needed to be done.

13) best movie of the year?

It’s late and I actually can’t even remember which movies I saw this year. I think I saw Mary and the Witch’s Flower in this past year, so I’m going to go with that. Because I’m really excited to see where Studio Ponoc takes things, and if they will carry on a Ghibli-ish legacy or do something new.

14) favourite place you travelled this year?

I went to Poland, twice. It was great! I’m slowly trying to get around all the European capitals, and it’s really nice to learn more about the places you go. I never feel like I’ve seen everything there is to see, which I guess is motivation to come back another time...

15) did you make any new friends?

Always. Yep, the benefit of moving to new jobs on a regular basis means that you get to meet new people, a lot. I’ve seen one of my FY1s develop into a great SHO and become a good friend. I’m so proud of them.

And hey, always making new friends here! I love our community, and whilst I can’t remember exactly when I befriended most of you (or got befriended), I am truly glad that I have.

16) did you learn anything about your sexuality this year?

Yep, I don’t think you ever stop learning. I’m looking forward to always finding out more. I don’t feel the need to share it, though :P Some things are better left private.

17) what are some hobbies that you developed?

Most of my hobbies are the same as they always were. However, I feel that I have played a lot of new board games, I continued to D&D without being an utter disaster, and now feel uh, sort of actually competent at this sort of thing. And I have collected some awesome dice.

18)what surprised you the most this year?

We’re still doing this Brexit thing. I don’t know; I’m not sure politics can surprise me much anymore. It’s still free to disappoint, though. Actually, a few patients survived who I didn’t expect. And some people died suddenly that we didn’t expect to pass at that point. So medicine is always surprising.

19) do you look different from the beginning of the year?

I have more grey hair. Like a LOT. My hair evidently plans to go silver way before I would have expected to. At this rate, I won’t make it to 40 with any brown hair left! My hair is almost waist length so it hasn’t changed all that much apart from the fact that it really wants me to cosplay white haired anime characters.

20) how did this year treat you in general?

People died. People got sick. People in my personal life, not patients, that is. It’s harder to deal with it when it’s not at work; when it’s people you know and care about. My parents had multiple procedures or surgeries. I sort of burned out at one point and vaguely considered if the path I am on is for me. I did a bit of soul-searching to try to work out what I really want, and what I really need. I’m still not sure I understand, but I’m getting closer.

21) what message would you give yourself at the beginning of the year?

You’ll live. It’s OK, it’ll work out, and you’ll get through it, like you always do.

22) has your fashion style changed this year?

Not really. I have too many clothes (mostly for work, if I’m honest) so I didn’t buy many this year. I definitely need to sell or give away some of the ones that just aren’t ‘me’ any more, though. I sometimes hold on to clothes for a long time, but in the end when it doesn’t feel right dressing like I did say, 10 years ago, then I feel the need to revamp my wardrobe.

23) one of the best meals you’ve had this year?

My mum randomly started making my favourite food more often, and I’m really happy! I keep asking her if there’s some kind of ulterior motive XD

24) who has made the biggest impact in your life this year?

Hmmm it’s really tough to think of any one particular person. Some of the stronger experiences with people were negative, but I refuse to dwell on them or name them; to single them out gives them a power and importance they don’t deserve. So instead I’d just have to say my network of friends and family, for keeping me going’ they have done a lot for me this year. Lots of little and big things that make me feel so loved and cared for.

25) what’s one thing that you hope will continue next year?

I will keep trying to do my best, and keep trying to look at the bigger picture. I’ll keep working on not letting medicine take over my life. I’ll keep trying to be a better doctor. I’ll keep making time for friends and family. I’ll keep trying my best to meet new people, and not let the times it didn’t work out get me down.

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thelittlestspider · 6 years

Text

get to know the writer tag

tagged by @the-color-of-roseblood, @ghost-possum, and @thevajunglebook. thank you for tagging me and i’m sorry it took this long.

i’m bad at coming up with questions so i’m not going to do the 10 questions. but i am going to answer the questions that were listed. also this is an open tag, so anyone who wants to do it can do it.

rules: answer 10 questions, create 10 new questions, and then tag 10 people

from the-color-of-roseblood:

1) We always talk about favorites. What’s your least favorite book?

hmmm. one book i’ve always hated is the scarlett letter. we read it in school and it was awful.

2) Do you have a favorite place to write? What’s it like there?

i didn’t really have a favorite place to write until recently. a few months ago i finally got a desk and i’ve been in love with it ever since.

very, very cluttered. there’s all kinds of stuff piled on it. on one side i’ve got soda cans, plastic bottles, my phone; the other side is junk food, my glasses case, a couple of necklaces. i have an old sugar plum fairie barbie on the top shelf that i tried to sell, that nobody wanted even though i had it for like $5 (i might post a picture of it later bc it’s super pretty).

3) Do you have any artistic endeavors other than writing? If not, what else would you most like to learn to do?

back before the writing bug really bit me, i used to draw all the time. now i barely ever draw unless i get really inspired.

hmmm, i don’t know. maybe sign up for duolingo and learn other languages?? other than that i don’t know.

4) What’s your favorite holiday? Why? Have you ever written a story involving that holiday?

halloween is my favorite, followed closely by christmas just bc i love the tacky decorations and the music and the movies and pretty much everything about it.

looool i have tried to write fics involving these holidays, but they never come out how i want them to and i’ve kind of given up on it.

5) How do you fight writer’s block?

silly answer: drink so much caffeine i ascend to the astral plane to get advice from the writing gods.

actual answer: there’s not really an easy way to answer this. sometimes i see writing posts that are like, “you have to write every day!!” and i’m thinking y’know that’s not always possible. whether i’m out of inspiration/ideas, or i’m in a depression spiral, or i’m tired from work, or maybe i’m just not feeling that particular project. it’s not a sin to need a break from your wips, bc even though it’s happy work it’s still work. and there’s no shame in needing to take a breather to get yourself sorted out.

on days when i’m ready to write, i do different things to get myself pumped up for my wips. i’ll make playlists, make aesthetic boards, sometimes i torture my mutuals with rambles about my ocs or tag them with little excerpts from the project. i really like making an aesthetic tag so i can go and look at all the pretty stuff that makes me think of the wip, so i can remind myself why i want to write it in the first place.

6) At what point in a WIP do you decide to send it to your first beta readers/reviewers?

probably not until i’m at least done with a second draft. the first draft needs to have all those plot holes filled, all those loose threads woven back together, characters need developing. showing a beta reader my first draft would be like taking a person to a room filled with beginning sketches of people where they’re still just shapes instead of having any defining features.

7) What’s your greatest inspiration?

i don’t think i have one lol.

8) A lot of writers have certain things they like to describe - food, clothes, fights, party scenes. What’s your favorite thing to describe?

emotional scenes where characters talk about their problems and they hug and maybe even cry. i’m a terrible person.

9) What’s your approximate ratio of reading to writing? How do you find time for both? Do you do both on the same day, or split it up?

you’re going to judge me for this, but i haven’t been reading actual books lol. the last few months i’ve just been reading fanfic oneshots with like the occasional multichapter fic thrown in. my attention span has been terrible.

10) What books would you recommend to someone to get them into reading?

i think it depends on the person. what i might find compelling, someone else might find super boring.

from ghost-possum:

1. What is your favorite book in a genre that you don’t tend to write? If you do fantasy/sci-fi, what’s your favorite romance? If you write literary, what’s your favorite paranormal YA?

i don’t really like writing stuff that doesn’t have some kind of paranormal element. so i guess i’d say my writing enemy that i like reading is real world drama.

my favorite books that are like idk period pieces i guess?? are Anne of Green Gables and Pride and Prejudice.

as for stuff that’s based in more recent times, there’s a ya series i really like called tiny pretty things that’s about a group of ballerinas competing against each other for spots for prima ballerina?? and there’s a lot of drama and backstabbing. it’s kind of a dark series.

2. What book would you love to see turned into a movie or tv show? Any particular reasons why?

i can’t think of anything right now. maybe green angel by alice hoffman?

3. Have you ever written a character with a certain real-life person in mind. Was it someone you know in real life or someone famous?

some of my ocs were originally based off acquaintances, but as i kept writing them the characters changed so much that they became pretty much unrecognizable.

4. If your latest WIP had a color scheme, what would it be?

paper heart would be red, orange, pink, and purple. the colors of a sunset with the threat of darkness falling over everything.

5. What do you eat or drink while writing (if anything)?

s’mores poptarts if i’m too lazy to get up and fix myself something. chips. different sodas: cherry coke, sunkist, grape fanta.

6. What do you do to restore your inspiration when you’re not writing?

watch movies/tv shows. listen to podcasts or music. look at cool pictures.

7. Coffee, Tea, Booze, or ALL THREE?

coffee and booze. i’m not a big fan of tea.

8. Who is your favorite visual artist?

uhhhh, does studio ghibli count? their artwork is so appealing to look at.

9. Do you have any other creative pursuits outside of writing? What are they?

maybe learning other languages??

10. What is your favorite trope, the one you will always fall for and never get enough of?

AAAAAAAAAAA, ENEMIES TO FRIENDS TO LOVERS.

from thevajunglebook:

1. Describe your WIP as a cross between two movies.

i’m trying to think of what paper heart would be, but i’m drawing a blank. this needs to be its own game where someone else guesses what movies your wip is the lovechild of.

2. What’s your favorite part of writing communities?

cheering on and also being cheered on during the writing process. getting to read all these wonderful stories written by wonderful people. knowing other people are suffering just as much as i am lol.

3. If you could collaborate with any writer (whether friend or idol), who would it be and what would you work on together?

i am terrible at collaborating with other people lol.

4. Do you prefer reading/writing standalones or series?

i love reading series, but i’m not good at writing them lol. yet somehow i always end up writing series.

5. Who is your ultimate OC otp(+)?

canon: for the next three days verse it’s between leana/yvonne and jason/bella for otp status. my ot5 is carter/matteo/violet/tiffany/nina.

for defect i’d say my otp is joe/alec. also ethan/noah later on down the line.

ot3: ned/alec/sage

ot4: ned/alec/joe/ray.

au: joe/ned/carter

for the graveyard of the forgotten it’s definitely orrinaz/eliya/amnayel.

6. If your OC(s) joined tumblr, what type of blog would they run?

i wish i could answer this question with the dedication it deserves. i feel like their blogs would have a lot of memes and shitposts with some aesthetic stuff thrown in.

7. If you could write an adaptation of any story, which would it be?

while i have zero desire to write an adaptation for a story, i’ve always liked the idea of a movie version of Green Angel by Alice Hoffman. mostly bc it’s surreal, a little weird, post apocalyptic, and it would just look really cool.

8. What common writing tips never work for you? And/or what uncommon advice do you swear by?

anything that’s like, “if you don’t write everyday, you’re not a real writer!!” like chill dude. just bc i’m not cranking out 1,000 words a day like some lean, mean, writing machine doesn’t mean i’m not dedicated to what i’m doing.

9. Do you research before, during, or after writing sessions?

it depends. sometimes i get to a point in a fic where i’m like, “uh oh” and i go into a research spiral trying to find this one specific thing. thinking ah yes, this is the specific thing i need at this very moment that i probably could do without.

10. Have you had a writing epiphany that totally revamped your WIP?

if only. there were a few game changers in the next three days series that changed things for the better:

- the way carter and matteo first met lmao.

- violet’s existence.

- sage rescuing and then leaving violet and carter.

- carter and nina’s bromance.

- alec and carter, and also joe and matteo being siblings.

- tiffany seeing ghosts.

#writing tag game

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britesparc · 3 years

Text

Weekend Top Ten #453

Top Ten Films That Make Me Happy

So every once in a while I do one of these things and the world ends up moving so fast that between me having an idea, writing the list, and it going up on Tumblr of a weekend, the plates have shifted and it doesn’t seem quite as relevant anymore. I remember listing ten films I wanted to see because cinemas were reopening; I think only two of them ever actually saw the inside of a Cineworld. And so we have this week; when I came up with the idea for the list, I thought either we’d all be in a celebratory mood, or else need commiserating. And at the time of writing, it’s looking – thankfully – that we’ll have enough reasons to be cheerful to be getting along with. But who knows? If you’re reading this on Saturday there may be a new president, or maybe the old one’s bombed China.

It’s a funny old world.

Anyway, like I said, my initial thought was that, in this time of darkness, we might need a little light; that everything is rather remorselessly grim and difficult, and we could do with a bit of cheering up. We’re all back in lockdown, the idiots are in charge, and Halo Infinite was delayed till next year. Lots of crap is going on. And, yes, fingers crossed, maybe we will be celebrating the Idiot in Chief getting booted out of 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue before too long, but life has taught me never to count chickens, and you can always do with a little restorative nip in your pocket, just in case. And what is a good curative for the blues? A fillum.

Yes, feel-good films. Cheerer-uppers. Movies that make ya happy. There are lots of them, of course; it’s practically a genre. But one man’s meat is another man’s poison, and one man’s (end of) It’s a Wonderful Life is another man’s (middle section of) It’s a Wonderful Life. Which is to say that what makes me happy might not make you happy. I found this when doing a bit of research for this list; as is common, I often have quite a few ideas when I’ve thought of a topic, but I like to Google it (or Bing it, as I get Microsoft Reward Points and I’m saving up for a few months of Game Pass), just in case there’s some obvious film that has escaped my mental grasp. In this case what I found was some of the films that people consider to be uplifting are downright weird – Forrest Gump? Really? And a lot of truly mediocre romcoms seem to float people’s happiness boats, from the wildly uneven Love Actually to the tepid You’ve Got Mail to the overlong and overly twee The Holiday (a film which I hated on first watch but which has grown on me, Stockholm-style, as I’ve seen it over and over again every year). And some people even list stuff like Lord of the Rings or Star Wars or Pirates of the Caribbean; good movies, true, but are they feel-good? I mean, loads of people die in all those films; in one of them an actual planet blows up. I know we like zombie monkeys and Harrison Ford in a waistcoat, but they’re not really the most relentlessly cheerful films, are they?

Or are they? I mean, when I got right down to it, there were quite a few blowy-uppy pictures that are genuine comfort blankets for me (Air Force One, which I watched so much at one point that I used to fall comfortably asleep to it when I was on my own, nearly made the cut). So, y’know, who am I to judge? I think what makes us feel comfortable, happy, and upbeat can be wildly diverse and erratic, even within our own taste window.

And really that’s what I was after here; comfort movies, films that uplift or inspire or just, well, make you smile. Not just because we’ve blown up the Death Star or because Tom Hanks has snogged Meg Ryan again. But there’s something about the film, from its story to its characters to its composition, that is continuously joyful.

So whether we’re lifting a glass in celebration or drowning our sorrows with an armful of Stella, here’s to the films that make us feel better. Chin up, folks. It might never happen!

Paddington 2 (2017): what is it about this film that evokes such joy? I’d say everything, from the script to the performances to the music to the shot choices. The bad guy is funny, the dire situations rarely threatening, almost everyone is nice, and it ends with a redemption and a musical number. Beyond all that, though, Paddington himself is such a supernova of absolute goodness that you can’t help but feel optimistic just by watching him. It’s perfect, really.

WALL-E (2008): a film that starts with the end of the world but it gets better. It’s a cinematic joy, the virtually dialogue-free opening giving us dystopic vistas and a real sense of mood. But it’s WALL-E himself who brings the real feels, a mechanical wonder who does nothing but make other people happy and improve their lives almost by accident. he saves the human race and the planet simply by trying to be nice to one person at a time, and that’s a hell of an optimistic message.

When Harry Met Sally (1989): far sarkier than the other two films, and obviously a bit more, well, grown up (we all know what you must not do with Mister Zero), this is nonetheless a beautiful film. A slow-burning romance between two friendly, funny people, witticisms flying from every mouth, some absolute, genuine emotional stakes that you really, really care about, and the single most romantic ending a film has ever had.

Groundhog Day (1993): let’s face it, it’s the best film either Harold Ramis or Bill Murray has ever been involved in, and I bought every issue of Transformers/Ghostbusters. A tour-de-force of cynicism and sourness from Murray, but he gradually unravels (in more ways than one), becoming a happier and better person. It’s funny, it’s sweet, and the complexities of its chronally-displaced plot means there’s loads you can unpick. Masterfully written, directed, and edited, and that’s some of its joy, too.

The Hudsucker Proxy (1994): the Coens have, obviously, made a lot of very good films, and not all of them are darkly serious (No Country) or darkly hilarious (Fargo); they also have lighter fare, but none as floaty-light or so supremely joyous as Hudsucker. The script is pure screwball but also a precisely-honed, fast-spoken, Golden Age charm; the performances are all fantastic (we also get the best Lois Lane, Perry White, and Steve Lombard scene ever shot, and it’s not even in a Superman film). Look, it’s hilarious, it’s arch, it’s fantastically put-together, and it’s actually, genuinely hopeful and optimistic. It’s my favourite Coen Brothers movie.

Singin' in the Rain (1952): I’ve always got a lot of love for movies about Old Hollywood, but Singin’ isn’t really some kind of backstage satire; really, it’s a story about love, honesty, and creativity – movies are just the backdrop. But it’s the songs. Let’s face it, it’s the songs – and dances. These are some of the most joyous songs put to celluloid, and Gene Kelly absolutely attacks them from all sides. But I’ve gotta say, my favourite number is probably Donald O’Connor running up the walls in “Make ‘Em Laugh”.

Strictly Ballroom (1992): there’s a personal touch to this one, as my wife and I chose “Love is in the Air” for the first dance at our wedding. But there’s more to this film than memories of me being a shit dancer: it’s a supremely romantic film, possibly the most enjoyable straight-up romance from Luhrmann’s Red Curtain trilogy (spoiler alert: no one dies). A great underdog tale, two kids taking down a corrupt system, a story of the unlikely girl nabbing the hot guy; it’s timeless, it’s well-told, and its unusual setting (ballroom dancing competitions in Australia) gives it an extra kick.

My Neighbour Totoro (1988): Ghibli films often present us with a nicer, fairer world, where even the nasty monsters are there to teach us important lessons, or at the very least plucky kids can do the right thing and save the day. Totoro is different in that there isn’t an antagonist; there isn't much drama or, really, plot. It’s two very small girls dealing with a complex life situation, and also a giant bear-monster thing with a massive mouth who could be scary but is actually really nice and magical and saves the day because the girls deserve it, and also there’s a hollow cat that’s also a bus. It’s fantastic, but it’s also so nice, just a load of nice people and nice monsters being nice to each other, and if – let's say – the elements can be good, can't we be good too?

Die Hard (1988): yeah, okay, contradiction corner; a supremely violent and sweary action movie that makes me “feel good”. Is it the bit where he throws a bomb down a lift? Or shoots a dude from beneath a table? Or when Ellis dies? Honestly, yeah, there’s a little bit of that; the action stuff is so well-done. But it’s also a film with a ton of heart and soul and wit and life. John McClane is a masterpiece of character design, a gruff cop with a heart of gold, a capable action hero but also a working-class schmo who just wants to try to get back with his wife. He struggles and bleeds and doubts himself; he’s not a superman. The villains are incredible, with great lines and great designs and a great scheme; you care about these guys, they’re interesting. There's a part of you that wants Gruber to get away as much as you want John and Holly to get back together. It's a Christmas movie, all about family and forgiveness, and It's just plain fun, uncynical and sentimental and really, really funny. It's the best action movie ever made, I watch it every year, and it brings me great, great comfort and joy.

The American President (1995): oh no, too soon! But I couldn’t include The West Wing in a list of feel-good films, so this is the next best thing; smart public servants being smart, as well as moral and just, wearing their immense power with the right amount of humility. Sorkin really believes in the majesty of the office of President, and the founding myth of America and what that means, and he makes you believe in it too. His dialogue is, of course, exceptional, witty bon-mots and one-liners, but the love story is great too; two people finding each other later in life and trying to make it work despite everything. So it’s a great film, a funny film, a sweet film, a romantic film, but also kinda important; a film that makes you aspire to higher ideals, that gives you hope and confidence in the institutions of government. I suppose it is a fantasy – God knows, the last four years have shaken these institutions to their very core, over here as much as in the States – but The American President can make you believe again.

There you go. Ten films that just make me happy if I'm down, or cement that happiness if I'm already in the mood. All of these films, you’ll notice, are also very, very good; not some kind of “guilty pleasure” (if such a thing exists; don’t pleasure-shame!). Funnily enough, it’s the quality of the films that adds to their charm; I appreciate the craft as much as the plot or theme or performances. Like when I watch American President (or, more accurately, The West Wing) and I just enjoy seeing people good at their jobs be good at their jobs, then watching a well-made film makes me happy because I like seeing people good at their jobs be good at their jobs.

Anyway. Tear yourself away from Twitter, stop refreshing fivethirtyeight.com, pour yourself a drink, and – hopefully – make yourself happy this weekend. Unless you voted for Trump, then you can get in a bin.

#top ten #feel-good films #feel-good movies #movies #happy #optimism #biden #harris

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radicaldreamer017 · 6 years

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Finished chapter 3 and in the middle of chapter 4 (and things are getting spoilery) :

- found a few more heart to heart. It was quite funny to have Tora laments on feeling useless in battle after I benched him. Guess the game does expect you to bench him for the new character.

- I noticed how these scenes are voiced and involve several characters. In XB1, the scenes are silent and involves only two characters bonding. The voice acting is cool but I think they should have kept the two character bonding thing (group stuff is nice too… but so far, Tora has been starring in all of them… i’m afraid the game may push some characters forward more than others in these heart to heart).

- so, met Zeke (it’s Zek in french apparently) and his blade twice. He’s so over the top lol… i saw people comparing him with Bart from Xenogears, but Bart was down to earth next to him (then again, the over the top shonen humor in XB2 is quite new to Xeno… except maybe when it comes to mascot characters). Bart also had a heavy backstory and duty. That said, eye patch thing, trying to snatch your « weapon » upon the first meeting… I can see why comparaisons are made. I’m waiting to see who Zeke is beyond “comic relief guy” though.

- I don’t know if it’s just me but enemies feel quite spongey compared to previous XB games. In the first game, it was quicker and easier to beat a group of enemies. Not so much here (in fact, I’m dying a lot... and chapter 4 is pissing me off a bit because of this... too many enemies ganging up on you, all spongey... the most annoying thing is getting teleported way back and all enemies getting revived). In the first XB game, I was already going against uniques in the first 10 hours. I never bothered to beat a single one in this one and i’m past 30 hours in. Then again, I was battling uniques in XB1 because it was part of the quests and I knew they were giving capacity points too.

- I really like Uraya overall. The town gives me Skyrim (Solitude) vibe coupled with Baten Kaitos maybe (with a touch of Zora village from Breath of the Wild) ?

- speaking of this town… i’m still clueless where their king or queen even is… where’s the palace ?

- i’m starting to understand maybe why people feel frustrated when exploring in this game. It took me way too much time to understand how to get to Uraya’s main town (and I just quit yesterday playing chapter 4 because a piece of bridge fell while i was walking on it and the only path towards the next main story point I can see is blocked by blade skills i don’t have... that said, maybe this bridge will be whole again when I’ll return to the game... otherwise, that would be bullshit). I also understand why it can feel frustrating to have exploration blocked by requirements that are entirely linked to the blades you managed to get based on pure luck. But I can only encourage Monolith to explore player/environment interactions further. Maybe Zelda’s success will make their next Xeno/jrpg game a lot better on this front (I have lots of gripes about the new Zelda sure… but the way we could interact with the environment, using elements and all, wasn’t one of them).

- so far, town music is definitively more memorable/better than in XB1 (Mitsuda composed them, didn’t he ?).

- while I like towns better in this than XB1, i think it really was a mistake to take the social network thing away. It just makes townies a lot less endearing. It takes away the sense of communities the first two Xenoblade games had. It was really one of Xenoblade’s biggest strength imo.

- returning to Argentum made me realize how nice this place is. A callback to the Thames from Xenogears but with warm Ghibli aesthetics too (love the interior in the upper floors).

- the more I play Tiger Tiger, the more I like it... Dunno if it’s because I was craving for some actual mini games in the modern Xeno games (sick of the hunt/fetch routine) or because the mini game is legit nice. But locking Poppi’s entire upgrade system behind a single mini game probably sucks for anyone who hates playing it.

- I can send blades to expeditions now… between this and the pull to get blades system, the game feels very mobile gacha inspired (by the way, got a rainbow in FFBE the same day I got KOS-MOS). Not that the expedition system was invented by mobile games. It was in FF Tactics on PS1 after all. But the way the characters are sent to missions just remind me of FFBE.

- Also, people sure don’t mind giving command of their military force to a kid they just met lol (old person speaking uhuh).

- this theater thing was nice (and very Baten Kaitos looking).

- the last bosses were brutal… even being higher leveled than them… until I just switched Vandham for Tora (well see, perverted furball… you’re more useful than the big guy with the giant bird after all… crazy).

- speaking of them… I find them quite obnoxious. Maybe it’s the Nomura aesthetics… or the fact they kept wrecking my party… I did feel a bit sorry for Akhos (?) in the end though.

- Malos, or the Sephiroth school of villainy… wearing Gaignun Kukai’s face.

- Giant robot flashback… and a bonus Zohar with a pissy Mithra in it. I love how i’m trying to enjoy this game without comparing it too much to its heavy successors story wise… but the game won’t let me. Oh well…

- hi Mythra… it amused me how she went « fuck off ! I didn’t want to wake up ! I’m out ! » just after being introduced. Also, one of her lines was straight out of Xenosaga 3. As a Xenogears fan, her behavior also reminded me of the « coward ».

- Vandham’s death. I did like the character... but not enough to feel much during this scene apparently (losing the wind bird though... rude... but you get it back quickly anyway). People are not going to feel much when a character they just met dies (unless they’re known to have a close bond with the main character from the get go maybe... which is why killing Alice in Xenogears or Fiora in Xenoblade 1 felt more brutal despite happening very early... because they were introduced as the “childhood friend character/love interest/sister”). Especially if the character is a big bulky guy and the death quite cliché for this kind of character.

- also... did... did they bury him in a freaking concrete/stone ground ?

- I only just remembered Poppi broke at the end of the chapter. But she wasn’t that broken, it seems. They really didn’t make a big fuss about it.

- first time in forever since a character shared a bed with his obvious love interest in a Xeno game. But let’s not expect anything mature here. Mythra was just sleepwalking and happened to end up in Rex’s bed. So, yeah... the whole scene was an entire “you stupid pervert” joke you often see in harem animes (with “omg boobs in front of my face” reaction from Rex). That said, this darn hat that Dromach wears is a thing of glory. Highlight of the scene lol... Ah, and they also acknowledge Mythra/Pyra’s clothing being ridiculous in this scene.

- the whole “thievery” plotline was kind of filler. But still, I guess I’m glad those kids have a place to belong now. Guess I can see the Oliver Twist inspiration here (Takahashi said it was one of the works that made him want to make XB2). And now, the bird is back and Rex can have another 5 stars blade (though, I also managed to get Perceval for him, with a common core crystal).

- Speaking of new rare blade, I also got Boreas for Nia. But controlling Nia with him as her main blade kinda sucks. Boreas is so big that he almost takes the whole screen. But he’s a healer. That’s cool. That’s Nia’s main job.

- Muimui... I’m so glad you’re not the playable mascot character (really, even considering Tora). Seriously, this little guy is like... a nopon version of Peter Pettigrew from Harry Potter (maybe it’s appriopriate, he seems shaddy). But higher pitched. And his name sounds kinda dumb, spoken out loud.

- I like Mor Ardain’s city. Reminds me of Nortune from Xenogears (too bad Mor Ardain’s Titan is a brown wasteland though... but hey, it is dying, after all).

- I really liked the cutscene introducing Mor Ardain’s “emperor”. The music was perfect, Morag and Brighid were there, I generally like child emperor/empress (like say, Larsa from FF12)... and I guess Morag is of royal blood now ?

- Tora’s background story unvealed... and I’m sure it was dramatic... but holy shit, I just wanted to laugh when seeing this small nopon holding a huge gun. Tora is like... Maria Balthasar as a male perverted Chuchu. It’s weird. Now, off to retrieve his giant rob... I mean, gothic lolita robot.

- Hot spring naked time... with convenient censor fog. I knew something like this was in ever since the first trailer. Some people managed to spot a keyword for a bath scene or something. Sigh... What should I say ? I like Persona and they did much worse with this kind of stuff. But it’s still pandering. I don’t even remember what the heck the girls were talking about (expect Poppi maybe... something about being waterproof ?).

- Second battle transition against Zeke was kind of funny. Rex gets bitchslapped by Mythra and the screen breaks, FF10 style.

#xenoblade 2 #thoughts in progress #currently playing

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jefferyryanlong · 4 years

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Fresh Listen - Aura Bora, Was (Bandcamp, 2017)

(Some pieces of recorded music operate more like organisms than records. They live, they breathe, they reproduce. Fresh Listen is a periodic review of recently and not-so-recently released albums that crawl among us like radioactive spiders, gifting us with superpowers from their stingers.)

It takes a particular kind of genius to compose a great rock lyric. It doesn’t require a great lyricist, per se. Dylan could certainly toss off a snappy non-sequitur once in a while (See “From a Buick 6″), but mostly had the tendency to spiral into dreamscape, or invoke the meter and imagery of the Bible. And sometimes he would just goof off on “I love you, you love me, goin’ down the sugar tree” pop song dumbness.

Paul Simon’s words, on the other hand, seem sweated from the self-consciousness of an English Lit “A” student with a subscription to The New Yorker and an obsession with figuring crossword puzzles form the Times. Joni Mitchell is too great a Poet in the big “P” sense of the word, too mellifluous and refined, to lumped in with inane and insignificant rock music-word writers, though after a joint or two she might let her hair down and “wreck her stockings in some jukebox dive.”

Even Chuck Berry, who more or less codified the aesthetics of a great rock and roll lyric, was perhaps too evolved a wordsmith for the genre he helped invent. Even though, for presumably commercial reasons, he became fixated on the afternoon minutiae of teenage hi-jinks, his great songs are truly great, by any genre’s measuring cup. “Memphis, Tennessee” is essentially a short story with an unexpected and heartbreaking twist at the end, and “The Promised Land” transforms geography into poetry in a way the Beats attempted but never so successfully (also slipping in a subtle commentary on the racism embedded in this country, in some places more dangerously so than others).

Great rock lyrics don’t aim high. But they cut deep. They don’t purport to be anything more than they are, a tossed off evocation of frustration or longing or dismissiveness (or all three together), a conscious Freudian tumble. For that reason, they threaten a kind of senselessness, if you peer too deeply into them. And you never should peer too deeply into them, unlike, as you might, “Court and Spark.” Their value is face-value only, and if a rock lyric doesn’t strike you once and hard, it might as well pass you by altogether. Jim Hendrix: “Acting funny, but I don’t know why / ‘Scuse me while I kiss the sky.” The Strokes: “Leaving just in time / Staying for a while / Rolling in the ocean / Trying to catch your eye.” Television: “I was listening, listening to the rain / I was hearing, hearing something else.” Hinds: “The satisfaction of / The inundation of / When you ring my bell / And I want to be ready for your smell.” These lyrics suggest and allude to much, but nothing more significant than what the words themselves are, and how they are sung.

By some melding of sympathetic creative minds, the former (they go away so fast) Hawai‘i rock band Aura Bora tapped into a metaphysical Rosetta Stone to translate their primitive heart-wishes into some of most compelling and seemingly effortless rock lyrics I’ve heard from any band, local or otherwise. Was, their 2017 album of eleven songs (two of them covers), is yet another example of how so many talented Hawai‘i-based bands move on from projects that must have squeezed so much time and emotion and embittered love from them (see Linus). Not only did Aura Bora rock hard with a skewed feel for rock riffs and melody, they were able to, with a jeweler’s eye for the brilliance just beyond the blemished surface, universally encapsulate what it meant to be a hard-drinking, band-playing, insecure scenester, beautifully over-analyzing relationships and flitting skittishly around the things they love for fear of the inevitable crushing.

Was (an apt title from a group that posted its music on Bandcamp after disbanding) kicks off with a song that firmly establishes Aura Bora’s sonic profile. apart from an uncharacteristically restrained vocal from singer-guitarist Jhune Liwanag. In fact, the sound of the album and its arrangements and aural inspirations, are consistent throughout all the songs, reminiscent of the best first rock records (Please Please Me, Is This It, to name a couple). Joey Green’s drums are competent and energetic all the way through--perhaps to a fault, as there were a couple opportunities in which subtlety and variation might have better suited the material.

That said, the music doesn’t suffer from the overly competent and loud drums. On that first track, “Whatever,” the one idiosyncrasy is Jhune’s disaffected vocal, adapted per the sentiment of the song. In all other performances, Jhune squeezes an evolving galaxy of rage, lust, anxiety, diffidence, and even affection (though guardedly so) from her singular vocal cords. “Whatever” is a kind of let-down doo-wop in which Caleb Hartsfield lays out the jagged, discordant harmonies through his consistently stunning lead guitar.

Caleb shares a vocal on the duet “Sour Skittles,” notable mostly for the guitarist’s unintelligible shouting. I get that we’re talking punk rock here, but I wish the band would have invested more truth-value into the song, with Caleb attempting tunefulness instead of burying the composition in meaningless emoting (vocals are best left to Jhune).

But Caleb’s contributions to Aura Bora far outweigh his deficiencies. The disappointed “No Good” wrecks his sympatico fills against Jhune’s lines, echoing a kind of lovelorn impatience. And on “Band-Aid,” he locks big into mystifying punk guitar, a sound that is not supposed to make sense but does, the riffs so off as to raise a middle finger to classic rock tropes, rhythmic but unbalanced, dizzied by youthful ferocity. “Band-Aid,” begins as a kiss-off a la “Positively 4th Street” (”You’re not dressed up the way you used to / You’re hair is fading and unkempt / It’s hard to come home from vacation / When you can barely pay the rent”) but, as if buoyed by it’s own relentless energy, the band pushes through toward optimism: “You’ve got some love to give, you just need some direction.” One paper it may come off as a tad twee, but in the context of the song it mixes a strong antidote to alleviate the negativity.

The first of the album’s stand-out tracks is “Gross,” which, if rearranged only slightly, could have been a hit for one of those street-toughened girl-groups of the early 1960s. “Would you like to take a walk with me off the pier of uncertainty?” Jhune sings with a defiance that almost preempts a response in the negative. “I think we share a common goal, the constant struggle to feel whole,” is just one of the lovable couplets in this abrasive seduction she lays on the presumably indifferent recipient of her affections: “I hope my voice gets stuck inside your brain.”

“Getting emotional / There’s danger in writing songs about the people you know” sets “Emotional” up as biography, or the use of art to reconcile and make meaningful the monumental banalities of our life episodes. Less a melody than a screed, June hashes out her memories in an effort to move toward an expression that she herself can own, that is not co-opted or underwritten by the sometimes bad intentions of partners of the past.

I wouldn’t have taken the time to write this post, or to delve as deeply into the music of Aura Bora, if not for “Ghibli Tears,” the extended masterpiece following bassist Will Adair’s otherwise undistinguished “Ghibli Beers.” “If you could hear my inner monologue / You’d be enamored of my thoughts / Are you still with that guy who told you not to smile?” Jhune sings, in one of the more tender tonalities on the human spectrum. But the power with which Jhune swings her emotional fist--as a singer-guitarist as well as a songwriter--is that she refuses to play a character in someone else’s story. Her thrust is in defining herself and her state of mind, not abdicating that authority out of need or desire. When Jhune declares, “To be honest, I’d rather be feared than liked / I won’t say yes if you ask me to spend the night / But I’ll take saccharine over nothing,” she reclaims a narrative that initially presents her a vulnerable. On “Ghibli Tears,” and throughout Was, the persona Jhune creates is so compelling--despite the ridiculousness and hypocrisies inherent in coupling up she remains, just past the exterior hardened by a string of unworthy and memorable-only-in-their-badness affairs, open to love and hope and the struggle to, as she puts it, “feel whole.” “Ghibli Tears” is more than a song, it is six or so minutes of that buried lonesomeness that resounds when, despite all that it is around us, we recognize that there is, undeniably, something missing against which the evocation of loneliness can resound.

The covers (”Falling Out of Love With You” and “We Are the Crystal Gems”) are fun and would have added levity, I’m sure, to Aura Bora’s live repertoire.

Like so much I write about on Fresh Listen, I’d like to see this record float, hopefully to some distant shore, to a new tribe of listeners that hear themselves as I hear versions of myself in these songs. The tragedy would be to let them sink under the tide of digital sonic trash widely available over the Internet. In the plainest lyrical terms, and with their indefatigable musical arrangements, Aura Bora documents, with a wicked sense of humor and hope, how hard it is sometimes: the human condition.

#freshlisten #aurabora #was #bandcamp

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httpsung · 7 years

Text

in the house that moves

pairing: reader x young k

genre: howl’s moving castle inspired au

word count: 2,412

next: pt.2

note: the first addition to my day6 x studio ghibli collection which will consist of one-shots or multi-part fics. pt 2 is in the works! keep an eye out :’)

In a field of tall viridescent blades, he laid un-bothered enjoying the sun’s warm rays against his olive skin. His eyes which were closed for the most part, opened to reveal a pair of chocolate orbs that gazed at the skies, watching the clouds gradually pass by. He hummed a soft melody, the wind lightly blowing his navy fringe, strands of hair shimmering among the verdure.

In the distance, the faint sound of a whistle rendered him silent, his arm rising in the air, hand opening in wait for something to land in it. The harmonious whistle grew louder and soon there was a paper bird fluttering above his fingertips before it nestled itself against his palm. The male exhaled with a sigh and opened the lifeless bird, reading a fancy letter from no other than the king of the land he resided in.

To the wizard currently known as Kang Younghyun,

You are needed to serve the land of Merywere in the oncoming war. Your duty to the king is non-negotiable. Please arrive at the palace within fourteen days or your absence will be condemned as felonious.

Sincerely the King’s advisor, Sungjin.

His lips curled at the corners into an amused smirk, a chuckle escaping in the form of a sigh. Younghyun crumbled the beautiful letter which was once a bird and set it aflame in his hand, letting the wind carry away its ashes. It was just like the young king to think he could do whatever he wanted with those who happened to be a little different. Wizards were a rarity in this world and the next but he surely wasn’t a tool to be used, especially out of greed or fear.

“Fourteen days huh?” He hummed another tune and sat up, snapping his fingers. A stairway of light formed from the sky, a spectacular sight to see for any ordinary human. Younghyun stretched his arms lazily in the air as he stood, climbing his way up the staircase to a wooden door. It was time for him to get moving and avoid the king as he’d always done, the ruler’s threats were never confirmed promises.

Turning the russet knob, he pushed the door open and disappeared as he passed through it, the staircase dissipating into golden dust.

Worn cobbled roads and aged architecture made up the town you strolled in. You were so fascinated by the sights all around that you almost forgot the mission at hand, to steal. Your pockets were full of coins and expensive trinkets from the wealthy that passed you by. With just a simple brush against them, you pretended to be a clumsy girl and apologized for bumping into their bodies while an innocent smile graced your lips. You were far from innocent, however, using that tactic each time to snag something valuable from them to make sure you’d survive a few days longer.

You were a common thief who had come to learn the ways of the streets from a tender age, running away from a façade of love promised by adults who wanted to take you in, knowing they only needed you for their own selfish reasons. You couldn’t handle the mistreatment of temporary families so you ran.

You always ran away, in and out of alleys, defending any belongings you owned from people much bigger and meaner. You were tough and always held your own, even making the manliest of men cry once. The life you lived wasn’t ideal but it was yours and you learned to deal with all the bad that happened.

There was a flurry of townsfolk just ahead of you, bustling back and forth at the open markets with vendors shouting out the best deals for people to buy. You didn’t plan on buying anything, setting your mind to snag as many loafs of bread and pieces of fruit you could hold in your knapsack. It would be easy, you repeated that in your mind like a mantra, ignoring the fact that you’ve gotten caught at least once or twice.

You approached one of the friendliest looking women who advertised fresh pastries and bread fresh from the oven. The sweet aroma filled your nostrils, your mouth salivating for a taste soon to come. While she turned her attention to someone looking to purchase her food you eased your hand over to the end of her display table, grabbing a couple of buns without being seen, that is until you heard the baritone voice of a male shouting for you to “stop right there!”

“Shit.” You cursed and began to run, shoving the evidence in your bag. The guy that caught you taking what wasn’t rightfully yours was a stocky law enforcer who you were sure you could outrun. You grinned as you picked up speed, your facial expression dropping when more police joined him on the chase.

“Stop her right now! She won’t get away this time!”

They knew who you were. You recognized one of the men from the next town over who caught you the first time. You were slowly starting to realize that maybe that had a warrant out for your capture.

You dodged women and children, knocking over vendor stands, a few gold coins spilling from your pockets which could have been used to buy yourself some fresh clothes. Your body had begun to tire as you ducked into an alleyway, their footsteps still loud and clear. Your eyes caught a brown wooden door of a house that you felt drawn to, feet running up the stairs, praying that the door would open the moment you turned the handle and that the men who were still far behind wouldn’t get a glimpse of your new hiding place.

You turned the handle, relief painting your features as you hurried inside and shut the door behind you, now all there was to worry about was if anyone lived in the home and what kind of excuse you could give about invading their residence so suddenly.

The house was dark, a bit of sunlight peeking from behind a curtain which revealed numerous cob webs and layers of dust on the furniture. Immediately you got the feeling that the home was empty which eased your nerves as you moved across the creaky floorboards.

Your body bumped into something, a table which was sure to leave a bruise on your hip with how hard you hit it. There was a single candle and a few old matches scattered among the wood and you wondered if you could give yourself some extra light in the area you were in.

Striking the first match didn’t work but the second lit perfectly allowing you to light the candle which burned so brightly it revealed the contents of the room clearly. There was minimal furniture with a few crummy paintings hanging and a staircase that lead to an upstairs. Slowly you made your way up, the sound of your own footsteps giving you a chill. You stopped in a hallway that split off into four different rooms. The first was a bathroom and the other three were bedrooms, one a whole lot bigger than the others.

Each room had its essentials but it seemed as if there hadn’t been life to occupy them in a long time. You let a content sigh escape you, your mind deciding to make this your temporary home for the evening until you were ready to continue your life on aged roads.

You settled into the biggest bedroom, dropping the bag you always carried to the floor and eating what little food you managed to snag. Once you were finished you tested the bathroom’s water to see if any ran through the old pipes, your face lighting up once warm water poured from the faucets.

It felt great to clean yourself up properly and you changed into something a little more comfortable before crashing on the vacant bed. The skies had become dark in a few short hours and the moon rose to provide a calm light that lulled you to sleep.

“Well now, who do we have here…?”

You dreamt of a man with a honeyed voice, but his face was rather unclear.

You woke the next morning, the sound of someone calling out your name ringing in your ears. You sat up and stretched your arms into the air before swinging your legs over the edge of the bed to stand. Your eyes glanced over to the bedroom window noticing bright blue skies and wisps of white clouds passing by.

The clouds seemed too close as if you were up in the air instead of on the ground. You took a few steps toward the window until your hands were resting on the windowsill, your eyes peering outside and what you saw made you scream.

The house was flying.

“What is this?!” You yelled in a panic. You turned around to notice that your environment had changed completely, the old bed you slept in became grand with silk sheets. Everything around you was a lot cleaner with no signs of dust.

You ran out the bedroom to check the other rooms which were also clean, the bathroom colorfully decorated with a bathtub full of steaming water and bubbles floating everywhere.

It couldn’t have been the same place. Who lived here?

For the first time in a long time, you felt a bit frightened. You eased down the stairs, taking in the elegant pieces of furniture free of cob webs, the paintings on the wall bright and full of life.

“Hello...?” You peeked into the kitchen to see a tea pot heating on the stove.

It had to be a dream, homes just don’t transform overnight.

“So, you’re finally awake. You’ve been sleeping for so long.” There was a familiar voice from behind you, prompting you to turn carefully. It was the same voice from your dream, but you were still dreaming, weren’t you?

A tall male stared at you as he leaned against the kitchen door frame, his arms folded across his chest. He had hair of a navy blue that shimmered something magical, an earring that dangled from one ear while a smaller one pierced the other. His pointed eyes were dark and they seemed like they would never let go of yours unless you looked away first.

“W-who… are you?” You stuttered, your typical strong composure diminishing under his gaze.

“I should be asking you that miss, you’re an intruder after all.” He chuckled and walked passed you into the kitchen to silence the tea kettle that began to whistle.

“I… uh...” You didn’t know what to say, you were a trespasser, that was true.

“Y/n… is it?” He asked as he took out two small cups from the cabinets.

“Wait, how do you know my name?” You frowned.

“Well darling, you slept in my bed. How could I not know?” The man turned around with a smile before pouring tea.

Your face flushed, his answer leaving you speechless. The bed you fell asleep in the night before was his?

“That doesn’t make any sense… this whole place doesn’t make sense.” You said trying to process everything that was going on.

“It makes sense to me, especially since this house is apart of me.” He chuckled as he turned around and walked toward you, handing you a cup of tea.

“What?” Another befuddled question left your mouth as your gaze followed him into the living room. The man pointed to a chair located at a table and it moved on its own as if it were inviting him to sit on it.

“What are you?!” You couldn’t help but raise your voice at the action, how was it humanly possible for a person to make objects move?

“A wizard.” He answered you confidently as he sat down, crossing one leg over the other while he took a sip from his cup.

“Wizard…” You repeated, your hands gripping the cup tightly as you gawked at him.

Wizards were heard of but rarely seen and usually worked for the king. The fact that one was sitting so casually in front of you had your emotions running wild. You didn’t know whether to fear him, deem him a liar or show excitement that he existed. Fear quickly took the forefront however, the tea cup slipping from your hand and crashing to the timbered floor as you bolted for the front door.

You felt the need to run away like you always did from situations you felt too complicated to stick around for. When you pulled open the door you gasped at the sight, remembering that the place you were in was flying among the clouds thousands of feet above the ground.

“You can’t flee like you always do Y/n…” The door shut on its own and you felt your body being pulled back against your will to the very same spot you were in before, the broken tea cup fixing itself before your eyes and settling into your hands again.

“I didn’t introduce myself how rude of me… I’m Kang Younghyun or Brian, I have gone by many names over the years, some have even called me Howl.” He said as he placed his cup on the table.

“Look… I’m sorry for inviting myself into your home, just let me leave and I promise you’ll never see me again...” You were nervous and unable to move thanks to something he was doing to your body.

“Do you really want to leave? Your life isn’t easy out there.” He flashed you a look of concern as he continued to speak.

“You’re a thief, it won’t be long before you’re seriously caught and locked away Y/n...”

“I have nothing else okay!” You exclaimed, tears brimming at the corners of your eyes. He was right and it was weird how he knew so much about you without you telling him anything.

“I know, but you could have something here if you like.” He flashed you a warm smile and with that you could move again, your heart pounding against your chest, trembling fingers trying to keep the warm cup of tea from slipping.

“What…?” You needed to hear him repeat his words again. Was he offering you a place to stay?

“Become my servant in this moving home of mine and you won’t have to worry about the law of Merywere again.”

He said with a sheepish grin.

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