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ganonfan1995 · 1 year

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I've thought it through, and I'm not really sure when I'm going to pick NHFOM back up.

I really wanted to see it through, but if I'm being honest, it was a project I started during a point in time where I was feeling 100% myself (both mentally and artistically) 2022 really slonked my shit stupid style, and recovering from all the trauma and misery has been a long loooong journey for me. Trying to revisit it now, while I still love the characters and the AU I built up around it, has been really complicated for me. On one hand I still think the material holds up, but on the other hand I've really lost a lot of the jokes and I've been struggling to connect with them. (maybe it's the depression, maybe its maybelline)

While I've been doing a lot better in this year, 2023, the further I move away from NHFOM the more I feel a bit alienated from it? I'm not sure how to describe it, it feels more like an obligation rather than something I'm excited to do.

That's all to say, is that I'm going to post the outline I had written back in 2021 for the first chapter of NHFOM. I might still pick this back up, but it feels weird to let it just rot in my google docs, unread and unloved. So if you're curious as to what Link and Ganondorf get up to, it'll all be under the cut. NOTE: The way I write comic outlines is VERY bare bones. These are mostly quick ideas and lack any sort of dialogue/structure outside of general pacing and ideas.

NO HYRULE FOR OLD MEN

Aryll’s Birthday:

Link convinces Ganondorf to allow him to send a letter to Aryll for her birthday.

The Soup:

Link tries to recreate his Grandma’s soup, destroying Ganondorf's kitchen in the process.

Heroes Clothes:

Ganondorf convinces Link to dress in Time’s clothes. They do not even remotely fit.

Link of the Past:

Ganondorf and Link drinking and reminiscing over OOT events, Link is trying to play along.

Thank god they’re both trashed.

The Bandana:

Ganondorf reprimands Link for being so careless about his appearance and asks him to get a haircut.

It’s revealed that Link has MPB and Ganondorf shares a culturally significant hairstyle w/ him in solidarity.

Miniblin:

Link befriends a Miniblin? I don’t have a joke for this one, it’s just cute.

Ganondorf’s Day Out:

Link discovers the portal Ganon uses to teleport between worlds, he follows him in disguise and learns about his “secret hideout”

Therapy:

Ganondorf is having his monthly therapy session with a bokoblin, distressing over Link and contemplating why he’s different now.

Link is fishing naked w/ Miniblin

Helmaroc King:

Aryll discovers that Helmaroc King loves fish and forms a bond with the giant bird. She breaks a deal to send letters to Link once in a while in exchange for a tuna.

The Boat:

Link notices a weird red boat with a face hanging out around the tower. He and miniblin decide to take it for a joyride.

Hero in Training:

Sick of his devil-may-care personality, Ganondorf convinces Link to take up some serious training. Link immediately throws his back out upon lifting a mock master sword.

Princess Zelda:

Upon learning more about the Triforce, Link purposely misleads Ganondorf in his quest to locate the third Triforce…Because he doesn’t want to move out.

The Desert:

Ganondorf recites his “my country lay in a vast desert” speech. Link interrupts to ask what a desert is.

Family Dinner:

Link makes dinner, Ganondorf is late and Link chews him out for his lack of appreciation towards him.

Ganondorf feels bad and surprises him with breakfast in bed. (this one is just gay)

Daddy Issues:

Ganondorf inquires about Link’s family, Link reveals that he never had a father and was raised by his grandmother. Link is surprised to find out they both have that in common.

The Boat Pt. 2:

King of Redlions stressing to Jabun that he thinks he may have discovered the Hero Reborn who has since been captured by the Demon King himself. Also tries to explain that…maybe it’s okay actually.

Cutaway to Ganondorf and Link playing a drinking game?

Aryll’s Visit:

It’s Link’s birthday this time, and Helmaroc King has a surprise planned for Link on Aryll’s behalf.

She reprimands him for still not changing his outfit.

Queen of Pirates:

Following rumours of a sunken kingdom, a mysterious Pirate Queen finds herself lost in Hyrule. Link scrambles to get her to leave, but she threatens to return and rob him and his ghostly king blind.

Minitime:

Link doing some introspection, discussing w/ Miniblin that, even though he’s evil…Maybe Ganondorf isn’t all that bad?

General Malaise:

Ganondorf has locked himself in his room for far too long, Link busts in to give him a heavy hitting pep talk.

Poetry Night:

It’s poetry night in the Tower, and everyone has something to share. Link prepares something that leaves Ganondorf legitimately moved.

Blinded with Science:

Ganondorf tries some new spells out to see if he can relieve Link of his triforce…prematurely. It does not work.

Accidentally Holding Out For A Hero:

Link follows Ganondorf to his hideout again to find the place besieged by the Pirate Queen’s crew. Link accidentally does something heroic to keep Ganondorf from harm and Tetra out of his grasp.

Streetwise Hercules:

Ganondorf finds himself in emotional turmoil after Link’s show of heroism, the urge to utterly crush him returns. Ganondorf is in an oddly optimistic mood.

Tennis Practice:

Link is in his weekly training w/ Phantom Ganon, Link has a lot on his mind. He questions his attractions to his captor while beating Phantom Ganon effortlessly.

Adventure of Miniblin:

Caught unaware, Ganondorf vents his emotions over Link to Miniblin. Miniblin is later found by Link who does the exact same thing. Miniblin is not capable of common speech, and is sick of the lack of communication between Link and Ganondorf.

The Duel:

Ganondorf approaches Link and passes him a note that says: “Do you wanna spar? Y/N”

The Duel Pt.2:

Link and Ganondorf find themselves evenly matched, both exhausted from age and lack of physical activity. Link convinces Ganondorf to join him in his weekly training sessions w/ Phantom Ganon.

The Duel Pt. 3:

Ganondorf joins tennis and finds the activity to be actually kind of fun and quite the workout. Admits he might not have given Phantom Ganon enough credit and offers him an additional day off from his duty.

The Outfit:

Aryll sends Link a new outfit, Ganondorf finds it to be too titillating and begs Link to change back.

The Nightmare:

Ganondorf is plagued with bad dreams and has difficulty falling asleep, Link offers him a homemade remedy, Grandma certified. (It’s 1:5 warm milk and rum)

The Boat Pt.3:

King of Redlions approaches Tetra, he has devised a plan to “rescue” Link from the demon king but he needs her help.

Miniblin Musing:

Link, playing with miniblin, asks Ganon where these things come from anyway. “I am not explaining the Dark World to you right now.”

Namesake:

Link has to explain that “Link” is just a really common hylian name. Some famous dead guy or something.

#nhfom

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