#nd i was just sorta relatively singling myself out thinking like. if he cared ab mr at all hed own up if he liked me he wouldnt bullshit me
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im am not the master kf putting two & 2 together
#ok this realization/lotic has been in my head for like 2 days now#which is a long time to go without talking ab it on here but p short otherwise 💀#but like. idk#so it was only like april that i really just let myself realize 'he likes me'. nothing really extra or hidden or attached.#like just accepting it as a fact#as opposed to flipping between 'hes obsessed with me' and 'he thinks im trash' yk#anyways. so recently id been slipping back into that extreme thinking. specifically 'he thinks im trash'#and a huge reason for thinking that is id think 'if he liked me he wouldnt bullshit me'#which like. is FAIR. cause thatd mean he really sucks at caring ab people in his life#nd i was just sorta relatively singling myself out thinking like. if he cared ab mr at all hed own up if he liked me he wouldnt bullshit me#as opposed to the OTHER people in his life. who he is of course very transparent with#so i was going on thinking he didnt like me bc he bullshit me that one time#and then it hit. 'he likes her And hes bullshitting her.'#and jts like. OH#yk. like that was one of the biggest factors i had for denial that he has Feelings for me#and now its been nullified by like. basic logic#idk how much sense that makes anyways i have work to do#that one crush situation lol
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