#my mom left the charred corpse of the easy mac on the stove for days as a reminder
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my family never let me have a single candle growing up because they didn’t trust me not to knock it over and start a fire
#whimsy whispers#you ever so accident prone that your family nana you from lighters and candles and literally cooking itself#i wasn’t allowed to use the microwave for years#but ig in my families defense for that one i did accidentally catch easy mac on fire in the microwave#but it’s my moms faul for asking a half asleep 10 or 11 year old who’s trying to play poptropica at near 12am to make her a cup of easy mac#like ma’am make it yourself and you wouldn’t have had to put out a fire while i flailed around like a sim to the right of you#if anyone is curious I forgot to add water and also didn’t remover they foil packet that contains the cheese#my mom left the charred corpse of the easy mac on the stove for days as a reminder#i woke up my sister panicking#and as I said I wasn’t trusted to cook for years after that#like idk yeah I get it they’re worried I’m a walking disaster so#i like almost ‘killed’ my friend Marianna like several times in 8th grade#the first time I allegedly was the reason she sprained her ankle on the risers in chorus#both we were both fucking around on the risers when we shouldn’t have been and she took a step back and started to fall and the guy behind#her saw this and moved out of the way and because of that her ankle got caught between the risers and hurt so technically it’s three peoples#fault#then I almost ‘poked her eye’ out with rolled up presentation paper (I forgot the word for the big thick paper you use for projects)#and then I gave her a chocolate i didn’t want not knowing it had peanut butter and she ate it then immediately realized it was peanut butter#and was like ‘crystalline why are you trying to kill me?!?’ like im so sorry but like I’m a danger to myself and others at this point#I’m half asleep rambling again oh my god but I’m not tired enough to be able to sleep and I hate it here because we’re leaving the house at#like 8 tomorrow and it’s 2:49am as I type this AHHH
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