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mariusperkins · 4 months

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my favourite new-to-me movies of 2023

a few years ago my resolution was to stop just only rewatching Ocean's Eleven over and over and actually watch some of the thousand-ish movies that I say I'm going to watch and then don't, which, honestly, has been Very fun and something I highly recommend! It also means that I watch a lot of movies that aren't actually "new" (which, honestly, I also recommend).

Picking a top 20 was really hard this year (I would do top 10 but that was impossible), I watched so many movies I absolutely LOVED, and so I narrowed them down to the below using the only criteria that I think really matters when it comes to lists like this which is 1. How insane did I feel about the movie at the time, and 2. Do I still feel insane about it when I think about it now.

This list got long so to save your dash I have put it under the cut:

20. Fire of Love (2022): a documentary about the lives of two volcanologists who ultimately died together in a volcanic eruption. It's told in such a beautiful, moving way, and I've been telling everyone I know to watch it, so of course it had to make this list

19. Lady For a Day (1933): a group of loosely-socially-connected people work together to convince a wealthy man that an old impoverished apple seller is a member of high society so her daughter (who also believes her slightly-estranged mother is high society) can marry into real high society. It was literally the first movie I watched in 2023 and I truly can't think of a better way to start off a year than with a movie that is about helping other people for the sake of Just Helping Them, because we should care about other people, because what else are we on this earth for if not to help and care about other people. Also, this is one of those 1930s movies that seems wildly progressive in it's treatment of women (nobody shames Annie for having a daughter out of wedlock or anything that goes along with that, everyone wants her to be happy, and healthy, and to help her get the thing that she wants above all else: for her daughter to be happy and safe).

18. The Talk of The Town (1942): one of the many "Cary Grant's most bisexual movies" but boy howdy is it!! Cary Grant, a communist sympathiser and unionist, has to hide out at Jean Arthur's farmhouse to escape the law after being accused of a crime he didn't commit but wouldn't you know it, Jean Arthur's just rented out her farmhouse to Ronald Coleman, a judge who prides himself on his neutrality who's about to be nominated to the supreme court! Jean Arthur, thinking fast, says Cary Grant is her gardener for the farmhouse and also sets about trying to prove to Ronald Coleman that Cary Grant is innocent, Cary Grant sets about trying to radicalise Ronald Coleman before he can get to the supreme court. Ronald Coleman spends a significant amount of time playing chess with Cary Grant while the two of them speak softly to each other. Just wonderful stuff, and Jean Arthur is so beautiful that I genuinely tried to find out what her skincare regime was.

17. Beyond The Infinite Two Minutes (2020): a short (just over an hour) Japanese scifi film where a man discovers that the tv in the cafe downstairs from him and the tv in his apartment are connected, with the tv in the cafe showing two minutes into the future (of whatever is in front of the tv in his apartment). It does some really fun stuff with this time-travel adjacent concept, especially in the final "fight" sequence! It's a little hard to find (I think I might have watched it on vimeo?), but absolutely worth it.

16. White Zombie (1932): sometimes called the "first zombie movie", it's so different from what we now think of as a "zombie movie" that it feels fresh (or, at least, it did to me). A young bride is "killed" by an evil count and brought back as a zombie forced to obey his will. I found the short scene towards the end of the movie where her husband and True Love almost breaks the hold on her mind and there's a close up of her expression as it changes from wide-eyed blankness to almost a smile before she slips back under Bela Lugosi's spell to be genuinely affecting. Also, there's a scene right at the start where Bela Lugosi's eyes are superimposed over a scene that I found genuinely frightening, I was as jumpscared by those eyes as a person watching in 1932 probably was, which is always a fun feeling.

15. A New Leaf (1971): Walter Matthau, an aging, asexual bachelor is informed that he is on the brink of complete poverty and decides to find a orphaned heiress to marry (and then murder) to keep himself in his preferred lifestyle. After several unsuccessful endeavors he meets Elaine May (who also wrote and directed the movie), a weathly and extremely absent-minded botanist. Instead of killing her, he trips his way through improving both her life and himself. I was enthralled by this movie, I just want to rotate every part of it in my mind forever.

14. It's a Wonderful Knife (2023): the most recent of all the movies on this list in terms of both release date and me having watched it, this slasher retelling of 'it's a wonderful life' has it all: a Scary Slasher opening featuring a killer with a gimmick ("The Angel"), the classic bit where she wishes she'd never been born and stumbles through realising Oh No I'm In The Universe Where I've Never Been Born, the universe saving True Love of lesbians, Justin Long being a little weirdo, the bit where she runs down the street wishing everyone and everything a merry christmas. All the in-text callouts by the characters that what's happening is "just like" it's a wonderful life snowballed into a (to me) touching romantic moment ("you were my Clarence"). It all just Worked!! The perfect holiday watch.

13. Bones (2001): I love a horror movie that I've never heard of and the early 2000s is a great time period for this. 1970s Snoop Dogg (with beautiful 1970s hair!) is murdered, and his ghost comes back to get revenge on those who killed him. Features some great gross-out horror scares (the nightclub scene, especially, made me jump out of my seat and pace around). Also, a very cool, scary-looking poster!

12. Eyes Without A Face (1960): A doctor attempts to use his plastic surgery skills to "replace" his daughter's face, which has been mangled in a car accident (that he caused). I hope whoever designed the mask the daughter wears, which is a plain white 'death mask' style with only the eyes cut out, got some kind of award because it's visually striking in every scene (especially when combined with her mod/60s coat). This movie is full of the gestures towards a broader life that his daughter would have had, or the life she did have that is just enough to both paint a vivid picture and make you feel so curious that the movie would be enthralling even without the serial murder/body horror aspect. Has one of the greatest "good for HER" endings to a movie I've ever seen, which I would implore you not to spoil for yourself if you want to watch this. The version up on internet archive does have english subtitles (thank you internet archive!!).

11. Grosse Point Blank (1997): A disconnected and disaffected hit man attends his high school reunion, confronting his past (the mother that barely recognises him, the girlfriend he abandoned on prom night, the friend that never heard from him after he left town) and his present (the other hit men attempting to kill him). I feel cringe somehow for putting this on my list, I feel cringe admitting that I did feel a big Swell of emotion as John Cusack makes eye contact with a baby as the lyrics to Queen/Bowie's 'Under Pressure' swells in the background (why don't we give ourselves one more chance), I even feel a little cringe for liking something that seems like it should only appeal to Gen X's. But what is this list for if not for films that game me cringe levels of emotions?

10. Waxworks (1988): Much like the early 2000s, the 1980s are also a great decade for 'horror movies you've never heard of'. The plot summary doesn't do much to give it away: 'a group of teens go to a wax museum and get killed off one by one'. "Well, that's just house of wax", you think to yourself, "I know what to expect from this movie". It isn't, and you don't. Please don't look up scenes ahead of time, please do watch this movie!

9. Knightriders (1981): I'm a very loud member of the Movies Should Be Shorter club but this movie is over two hours and I wish it had gone on forever. Every time you think 'well that's the end of the movie' another movie arc starts, and I couldn't have been happier. It follows the "knights" (motorbike stuntmen) in an 80s renaissance fair as they travel from town to town, argue about modernising, and put on shows. Feels like you're really vibing with them under the 1980s sun. Also features a cameo of Stephen King, who eats a sandwich in a truly disgusting way.

8. House (1977): a group of teen girls go to the house of one of the girl's aunts. It's a very haunted house. The best way I can think to describe it is that it's like watching the description of a nightmare you had as a child, almost too over the top and ridiculous to be scary in an explainable way but it is still scary. I'll think about the piano sequence until the day I die.

7. They Might Be Giants (1971): A man who, after the death of his wife and his subsequent mental breakdown, believe himself to be Sherlock Holmes. His brother, who's attempting to get him committed to collect his inheritance, introduces him to a woman named Dr Watson. They run around around town as the man who believes himself to be Sherlock Holmes attempts to solve the mystery that he believes Moriarty is orchestrating, solving real problems for various people around town almost by accident. A extremely hopeful and upbeat movie with the saddest last 60 seconds to a movie I've ever seen, a very, very bittersweet love story.

6. The Palm Beach Story (1942): Claudette Colbert is deeply in love with her big rectangle of a husband Joel McCrea, but wants to divorce him because she believes that providing for her is holding him back (and he won't let her accept money from random men who want to give her money for being beautiful - a realistic thing to happen if you are Claudette Colbert imo). He's desperate to stay married to her so when she runs off to Palm Beach for a quickie 1940s divorce he follows her, but on the way she meets mega rich Rudy Vallee who falls instantly in love with her. As a complete 180 to the previous movie, this is a fun movie with the most rediculous final 60 seconds. I truly believe that your enjoyment of the movie hinges on those final moments - I, of course, loved it.

5. The Abominable Dr Phibes (1971): the king of horror Vincent Price stars as the mysterious Dr Phibes, who's out to kill a very specific set of people in various very specific ways, assisted by his beautiful and incredibly dressed assistant Vulnavia while the police unsuccessfully try to figure out what he's doing and stop him. I truly loved this movie, the mystery just silly enough, the kills just over the top enough, the elaborate sets not really trying to not look like sets and better off for it!! The sequel, in which Dr Phibes and Vulnavia travel to Egypt to resurrect Dr Phibes' wife, is also quite good!

4. Brief Encounters (1945): A man and woman, both happily (or at least contentedly) married to other people, meet and fall into a whirlwind-style love before the real world crashes back into them. Soul-obliteratingly sad, but in the way that love can be, sometimes.

3. Shocker (1989): A college student starts having visions of a serial murderer in which the murderer can see him, helps to catch the murderer... And then the movie really starts. This was going to be lower down until I realised that it's become such a reference point for me since I watched it. I wish Wes Craven would make a sequel about the protagonist's girlfriend, who, by the end of the movie, is a ghost who shares his body.

2. Wild Thing (1987): Tarzan, but if Tarzan was in 1980s New York instead of the jungle. I had such a fun time with this movie! Excellent use of 'wild thing' (the song) needle drop, which happens in conjunction with a Spiderman-style man-on-the-street interview section. To me, this one is an undiscovered gem.

1. Tampopo (1985): a woman, who isn't good at making ramen but owns a ramen shop, asks a truck driver and his friend to help her improve her cooking. He agrees, and they begin a winding journey, encountering and befriending various people to help her along the way. Tampopo is also a movie that's interested in exploring the different relationships people can have to food and the different roles it plays in society, so it's full of little tiny scenes staring all kinds of wonderful weirdos like this scene, which is one of my favourite scenes in all of cinema, of a little old woman causing chaos in a small supermarket late at night. Also, if you watch this movie: get ramen first, because otherwise you'll have to pause the movie to go and get food.

Honourable Mentions: You've Heard Of This Edition

Best movie about The Movies: Asteroid City (2023)

Best action scene that made me claw at the person next to me: Mission Impossible (Dead Reckoning Part One (2023)

Award for 'movie famous for being good that is good': RoboCop (1987)

Award for 'movie referenced as a punchline that actually has Things To Say about the treatment of houseless people to the point that I now feel like those punchlines do the movie and incredible disservice': C.H.U.D (1984)

Best rediculous stunts/scene chewing from Jake Gyllenhaal: Ambulance (2022)

Best 4th movie in a film series that was still incredible and also made me cry: John Wick Chapter 4 (2023)

Award for special effects/goo (for when you see the clones sloughing out of the pods): Invasion of the Body Snatchers (1956)

Best use of Bill Pullman as a romantic lead: While You Were Sleeping (1995)

Award for 'predator movie that is actually enjoyable to watch': Prey (2022)

Best use of cocaine as a plot device: Cocaine Bear (2023)

Honourable Mentions: Maybe You Haven't Heard Of This Edition

Best movie that is just really a series of weird little sketches: Better Off Dead (1985)

Best movie about a married couple that are horny for each other: Undercover Blues (1993)

Best use of Willem Dafoe as an ally to the protagonist: Daybreakers (2009)

Best use of a one location (and primarily one set): Welcome Back Mr McDonald (1997)

Best use of the little lock of hair that falls out of the gelled-back hairdo in a 1930s male lead: Love Is News (1937)

Best use of enemies-to-lovers: Legal Eagles (1986)

Best use of Bob Hope: Nothing but the Truth (1941)

Award for 'most people cheating on each other with everyone else' in a single movie: Dinner at Eight (1933)

Best movie involving a woman who died and then possesses another woman to get revenge on the man who killed her: Supernatural (1933)

Best use of weird masks and scary basements: Popcorn (1991)

Award for 'most 1980s tropes in a 1930s movie': The Old Dark House (1932)

Best underutilised setting for a horror movie: Intruder (1989)

Best movie that you truly can't believe got made and released: Roar (1981)

Best performance of an actor pretending to be a robot: Deadly Friend (1986)

Best 1930s 'extremely wealthy old man and poor fast talking woman best friendship' in a movie: Easy Living (1937)

Best early 2000s thriller you haven't heard of/best Emily Blunt performance: Wind Chill (2007)

Best use of 1940s tropes and jokes in a hallmark movie: A Biltmore Christmas (2023)

Best use of best friends in a noir movie: The Gun for Hire (1942)

Best netflix movie that netflix inexplicably didn't bother promoting: They Cloned Tyrone (2023)

Best Dylan O'Brien performance: The Outfit (2022)

Best slimy little weasel performance: Cure For Wellness (2016)

Best use of time travel to a Very specific but not well-known historical event: Timeline (2003)

Award for most specific accident in a horror movie that required a transplant: Mad Love (1935)

#mariusperkins at the movie #if you enjoy this let me know and I'll do more of it I guess

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