#like. good daughters TM don’t make their moms cry over how fucking useless they are at raising them HELP
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Do not reblog this. Lol.
#going to actually scream why am I like this#me: I think I am mentally well adjusted enough to have a call with my mother#me not even twenty minutes after the call: girl help that was a lie#i feel so bad??? like. i keep Fucking up she quite literally should’ve aborted me Christ#it would’ve. cost so much less in her life if she did not have me I think#anyway <3333 grades = my self worth I guess lol#like. why do i bother working at all of the result is still ‘hey! you did really shitty. feel bad and die’#yes i’m back on my bullshit#yes I’m fully hyper aware that my perfectionism is a trauma response.yes I’m aware that my fear of failure stems from financial instability#does not change the fact that I am still going To feel this way forever actually#like. good daughters TM don’t make their moms cry over how fucking useless they are at raising them HELP#they do what their told and excel and are perfect and choose careers that are actually Going to put food on the table LOL#pov: you are me and you are a dumbass and can’t even pass classes in fucking art school hahahahaha I want to die#do#not reblog or like this I’ll actually bite you#anyway ya boi is 19 and still has mommy issues and undiagnosed mental illness#screams. that feeling when your dad is in prison and it is making the financial situation worse. girl help#why couldn’t I have just been actually self sufficient and not a fuck up I hate myself#the bitter ocean rants
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