#like ill be off like 4 tabs of acid and be able to order and uber for someone who isnt physically with me already to come to my location
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*sees post about common trauma responses* *sees "has to control everything" right at the top* ah,
#listen#im fully aware that im a control freak in many ways and try to remind myself that its a trauma response but its the one thing i have#the hardest time with? like should i just let other people take the reigns sometimes? yes! will i? no likely not!#i dont even let myself fully experience drugs i still have to be in full control of my body and my thoughts and actions#like ill be off like 4 tabs of acid and be able to order and uber for someone who isnt physically with me already to come to my location#thats not how youre supposed to enjoy drugs and yet i ca t even let my sense of control down for even something silly like that!#anyways!#kasper.txt
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