#like if he matured he would've contacted me and apologized in hs for being a dick half the time
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just found out the guy i was frenemies with in middle school got a boyfriend
#the last conversation we had before graduating 8th grade was me telling him and this other mutual friend that i thought i was maybe gay#he was like one of the quiet snarky types and its funny bc we all thought he was straight. turns out he was bisexual#and i was a lesbian 😭#im honestly jealous of him. hes white with a liberal family and friend group. he can go around with boyfriend and be happy#i cant even go on dates without my mom getting suspicious or someone in the community spreading a rumour slash snitching#it just makes me so upset why do i have to get the short end of the stick everyone else i know is doing fine so why not me#and like yeah easy to say i guess like this guy probs had to cut off a few old friends bc i remember our middle school friend group#who all went to hs together (minus myself. i went to a diff hs which is why i stopped talking to those ppl altogether)#had some homophobic dudes#but like . still cutting off a few friends versus having your whole immediate and extended family disown you?#huge fucking difference...#also im kinda mad hearing about him bc i always wanted to be closer to the kids in middle school but they were always hot and cold with me#like if he matured he would've contacted me and apologized in hs for being a dick half the time#and then i would feel at least some closure from being treated shitty for half of middle school#i didnt even want to stay friends throughout hs i just wanted an apology#damn wtf just opened a whole can of worms BCJJDJSJSK over sharing. complete#z.post
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