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softupshur · 7 years

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Imperfect Faith: Chapter 3

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When her mother is arrested on Lydia Degan's ranch, a young Marta finds herself amidst the Testament of New Ezekiel in its infancy. As she travels with the other escapees, she watches the church grow, the gospel teachings evolve, and create a close bond with the reverend Sullivan Knoth.

Characters: Marta and Sullivan Knoth

Chapter 3-October 1, 1968:

The members of the testament shuffled around the bus and chattered earlier than usual. They gathered supplies and spoke a hundred miles a minute, but Marta was only now waking up. She searched for Knoth first, but settled on Jasmine, who was one of the few people not preoccupied.

“Miss Jasmine?”

“Oh, good morning, Marta. How are you?”

“Confused. Why is everyone in such a rush?”

Jasmine smiled brightly. “Father Knoth says it is finally safe for us to go out again, so everyone is making an event of it.”

“That’s good,” Marta took the seat beside Jasmine. “Are there plans?”

“It depends on who you ask.” Jasmine looked to the men from the radio. “The men are going out to look for work to build our funds back up. Father Knoth is going to preach, and I’m going to stay with a few of the women to watch after the little ones. We were thinking of going for a picnic in the park. How does that sound?”

Marta didn’t realize herself to be a ‘little one’ until Jasmine’s question. It made her frown. “I’m sure you all will have a nice time.”

“You don’t want to go? I know it might not be much fun with a bunch of ladies and little babies, but I’m sure there will be other kids there, closer to your age.”

Marta shook her head. “Thank you, but I think I’ll do something else.”

“I see…” Jasmine’s voice sank for a moment before she picked it back up. “Well, I know some of the younger couples are going into town. Maybe you’d like to join one of them?”

Marta looked out to the groups of people.

They laughed and chattered amongst themselves, but whenever Marta came to them, there were frowns and silence. Most of the testament avoided Marta when they could. As if looking at the child would bring a curse to them.

Then there was Knoth with his favorite deacon: Henry, the same man who brought Marta to the bus. They talked to one another in hushed tones, but Marta still went to join them.

She stood aside, and waited for them to finish, without a word.

Henry overlooked her and walked by when the conversation ended, but Knoth remained.

“Good morning, Marta. How are you?”

“I’m doing well, Father Knoth,” Marta replied. “How about yourself?”

“Very well. It’s been a long time since we’ve been able to spread our word to the outside. I believe God has presented us this opportunity because more can be saved than we had initially thought possible.”

Marta smiled at the thought. “Is there any way I can help?”

Knoth’s eyes widened slightly. “You wouldn’t rather go to the park with the women?”

Marta shook her head. “No, I’d much rather help the testament.” At first she spoke in confidence, but when Knoth took longer to respond than usual, she continued. “But only if that’s okay. I understand if I’m too young to help.”

“Not at all,” Knoth chuckled. “I was just surprised is all, but if you would like to help, then you are welcome to come along. I think I have a perfect job for you.”

“Really?”

“Yes, but first, let us pray.”

“Yes, Father.”

“Brother Henry, would you please lead us in prayer?”

“Certainly, Father Knoth.”

Henry bowed his head and prayer and began when Knoth and Marta followed suit.

“Our father who art in Heaven, please guide us as we venture out to preach your word this blessed day. Guide the lost and weary to us. Let them see your presence through your prophet Knoth. Give him the right words to say, and bless our flock as they work for our cause. Praise be to the God of Abraham, and of Isaac, and of Knoth. Amen.”

“Thank you, Henry,” Knoth said of the prayer. “I trust God will indeed be with us today.”

The trio left the bus, and began their walk into town.

As they started out, Knoth handed Marta a stack of brochures he carried. “I would like it if you could help me hand these out. Sometimes they are the only way to get through to the people, a physical reminder of our message. That’s why it is an important job. For once we gained a follower of a man on the streets, finding this on the ground. He took it as a sign and sought us out. Now, he is a valuable member of our testament, and seeks out work today with the others to help our cause.”

The story brought a smile to Marta’s face. “I’m glad that we can help more people. Do you think that a lot will be saved today?”

“I certainly hope so. I would save them all if I could.”

“Well...we can save a lot, right?”

“Perhaps, but we must not get too ahead of ourselves.”

“But we want to save as many as possible, right?”

“We do, but it is not always about saving everyone. Sometimes it is about saving only one person, but even if that is all we can save, we must still take joy. For that means one less soul to the pit. One more person to call a brother or sister.”

“Yes, one is better than none at all...”

“Remember that today, Marta. If we can save just one person: man, woman, or child, then God will rejoice in us. For does the shepherd not rejoice more in retrieving the single lost lamb, over the 99 already found?”

“He does.”

“Then so shall we.”

The rest of walk was made in relative silence, aside from the occasional small talk between Knoth and Henry.

20 minutes later, they found themselves at a block bustling with life. Every store had its doors wide open, and plenty of customers weaved in and out the shops. They passed by buskers and street performers, but there was still an open spot for the reverend, as if it were reserved for him.

He took the area and looked to Henry and Marta for approval before he began his sermon.

“God has spoken to me!”

A businessman quickened his pace.

“And he speaks of his displeasure in us. For since the sacrifice of his only begotten son, man has twisted and perversed his teachings beyond recognition!”

A woman ignores Henry when he tries to give her a brochure, but she does stop and take the one from Marta. She forces a smile for the little girl, but she is quick to be on her way.

“But fear not! In his great mercy, God has given us time to repent! He has not yet abandoned us! For from the book of Deuteronomy Chapter 18, verse 18, ‘I will raise up for them a prophet like you from among their brothers. And I will put my words in his mouth, and he shall speak to them all that I command him’. Gather and I shall speak those words to you!”

Marta hands out a few more brochures, but she sees one man throw it in the trashcan when he thinks she is not looking.

“But paradise is still at hand! Even as you all pass by, God is still reaching out!”

A few men are stopped by Knoth’s targeting words. They stop and listen for a few minutes, but when they read through the brochure, they shuffle away, their heads hung low.

Marta smiles when one keeps ahold of his pamphlet.

“He’s in our dreams, calling for us when we sleep. A hushed murmur in the masses, a figure in the distance, a voice in the static…”

A gentleman dressed nicer than the others stops to listen.

Marta expects him to hurry by like the others, but he never turns away. He takes the pamphlet and scans it throughout the sermon.

Only when Knoth steps down does the gentleman speak.

“You hear the voice in the static too?”

“Yes, I do,” Knoth’s voice softened then. For he spoke not as a preacher, but a fellow man. “But its message only became clear when I was at my lowest point.”

The gentleman chuckled. “And here I was thinking I was losing my damn mind. No one has believed me about the static. Even my wife said I was crazy.”

“What did you hear in the voice?” Knoth asked him.

“I was hoping you could tell me.”

“Do you not understand its message?”

He shook his head. “I hear it as clear as we’re talking now, but I don’t know what it is telling me. It speaks in gibberish, but the voice is so clearly human. I wish I knew how to describe it better…”

“Sometimes the holy voices speak to us in tongues that we cannot comprehend, but I believe the voice is what beckoned you to us today. For God was calling out to you to save you from his wrath.”

“I can’t say I’ve ever been a religious man,” he started, before looking Knoth in the eye. “But you’re the first person who didn’t call me crazy for hearing things.”

“Many a great men have been called crazy in their time, have they not?”

“Can’t argue with you there, sir.”

“Please, call me Father Knoth.”

“Then call me Dr. Friedman.”

“Oh, a doctor, are you?”

“A surgeon to be precise. For eight years now, but I don’t know. It’s complicated…”

Knoth put a hand on the gentleman’s shoulder. “Tell me all about it, son.”

Knoth took a seat with Friedman, and Marta looked to Henry for instruction. “Do we keep passing these out?” Marta asked of her dwindling stock of pamphlets.

“We can take a break now. Let them have their space.”

Marta nodded and joined the deacon’s side, allowing Knoth and Friedman their privacy.

“Is this how the sermons usually go?” she asked him.

“Sometimes,” Henry replied.

“How do they go other times?”

“We used to get more people, but that was in a town where we were known. We have to start from scratch now, so it’s inevitable we will not receive as many, but it’s okay. Father Knoth will guide us through this as he always had.”

“What was the biggest sermon you’d ever seen?”

Henry smiled. “The sermon where I was saved. He spoke with such conviction and power that we were all drawn to him that day. He wasn’t like the rest of those preachers who sing Kumbaya and tell you that God loves everyone no matter what. Knoth understood the road to salvation is a perilous one. It’s a harsh truth that many turn their eyes from, but that doesn’t change it. For how could a kind and loving God create a world so harsh and cruel?”

Marta shifted uncomfortably. He spoke the same philosophies as Knoth, but hadn’t Knoth’s sympathy. “But doesn’t God promise us paradise? Wouldn’t he have to be kind if he promises that?”

“He can be, but only those with the strength to follow him. That’s why we must rejoice in the single lost lamb. For if we concern ourselves with wolves…” he shook his head, unable to finish. “Just consider yourself blessed that you are of those 99 sheep who need not be sought out.”

Marta chose not to engage the deacon any further, and he didn’t force her to talk anymore. They merely waited together until Knoth and Friedman had had their time.

Before they returned to their own, Knoth had spoken two more sermons. Some passed by, and others stayed to listen, but Friedman was the only one to join them when they made the journey back.

Nonetheless, Knoth continued to speak excitedly of the testament, and it was at each others side that they walked all the way back.

#I had to research bible verses and tune into former years of baptist church services for this chapter fml #a very Knoth-centric chapter fyi #Marta #Sullivan Knoth #Outlast 2 #writing #fanfiction

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