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#like Simon isn’t suave or a show off like Johnny
jean----ralphio · 3 years
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IT’S BoB LIVEBLOG TIME
Episode 1 is under the cut!
Warning, I swear a lot... and am very in love with RSJ so a lot of this was just me pointing at the screen and screaming RICH and then remembering you can’t see me so writing it down...
Episode 1: Curahee! Curaahhee? Curraahhee? I can’t spell so I’m renaming it Ross is a punk bitch
Buckle up my babies, this will be a carcrash!
00:01 Here we fucking go aw yis
00:11 Aw who’s this? I wish they named the gentlemen at the start of the episodes, I wanna know who is who :s
00:25 Shifty, is that you my angel son?
00:41 OMG you guys… these men are breaking my heart </3
01:06 Lord, men were committing suicide because they couldn’t go to fight? That mentality… man. Oh my God, you angels. Babies.
01:36 No jokes allowed, every man is <3
01:40 Now that I’m humbled and we’re all well and truly miserable…the credits, ugh, my heart. The score is amaziiiing. Some of the footage is actual war-time footage, I read, which is a brilliant touch.
02:01 DICK <3
02:13 DICK’S HUSBAND <3
02:18 RSJ’S NAAAAAME
02:27 JFC this music makes me so emotional. Look there’s Matthew Settle’s face. That makes me emotional too
02:48 Ah it’s Roe <3
03:48 I’m trying to pick them all out in the line-up but I can’t tell who is who. Are we supposed to be able to? There’s a short one in the middle, is that Harry?
03:49 I’m not drunk enough to handle this
04:10 Upottery? Ah it’s so English I love it. That’s not a name! Wtf is up with English place-names, you guys have the weirdest names. Upottery? Seriously? Is it only potters that live there? I’m so confused
04:22 Close up of Roe! Perfect. I approve.
04:32 Is that the guy from Line of Duty? I think it is
04:39 Lip <3
04:44 Ew. GTFO Cobb. He doesn’t even go here
04:47 IS THAT RICH? RICH. ILY. ILY RICH. Please note that 94% of this will be a Rich-watch
04:53 Lieb stop. I am sure you are not a certified hairdresser
04:56 RICH. SMOKING. SMOKING RICH. More like smoking hot do you see what I did there?
05:20 I can categorically say that I love Joe Toye. I do. I love him. But every time I see Kirk Acevedo, all I think of is Charlie my baby from Fringe (awesome show, please watch it). And I just. Charlieee <3
05:39 Aw. They’re so sad
05:55 They’re so despondent. Guys. It’s fine
06:05 Fassy?? FASSY!!
06:18 God Damien is pretty
06:25 Nix that’s not how you flirt
06:57 Lol at Dick noting its happy hour. Thinking about taking Nix on a date, are we? I bet you are. Now THAT is how you flirt!
07:24 OMG the fucking flirting! GUYS. “And give up all this?” NIX SAYS AS HE CHECKS HIM OUT
07:37 Yeah, Nix, you’ll take him ‘to Chicago’ huh? Is that what they call it nowadays.
07:44 Do you want to be that cigarette? ‘Cos there is nothing heterosexual about that lingering look, Dick
08:18 ‘Murica time
08:25 Ross, fuck off. Nice jacket though. “You PEOPLE are at the position of attention” ugh GTFO. Dick’s sideye tho lol
08:52 NGL Ross does a great job at being super unlikeable
09:05 Noooo you don’t want it with Johnny Martin. You wont win. Yeah, walk away Ross
09:15 Careful around Lip too, or Speirs will materialize out of thin air and snap your neck
09:33 RICH. Don’t be scared of that douchebag, baby
09:43 What kind of question is that, there is nothing Lieb wants more!
09:50 It’s weird hearing Ross swear tho
10:26 Don’t argue with Johnny, baby. Also Roe OMG <3 Shane is freaking fit
10:43 Wow Lip is ripped
10:48 Oh no, poor baby. Lip leave him be ☹ </3
11:10 LOL I just noticed the drum by the door. It says ‘butts’ and it took me a seconds to realise it was for cigarettes. I am an adult (31-year-old married woman). I’ll laugh at the word butts if I want.
11:11 RICH
11:18 Lieb omg lol
11:39 RICH BABY NO! FUCK OFF ROSS! LEAVE HIM ALONE OR I WILL HAVE SPEIRS CUT YOU
11:52 I can’t take Ross seriously in those shorts. Hi-ho GTFO
12:07 Ew fuck off running up that, I’d just nope out like nah babe imma go chill with that sweet baby back in the butts cabin
12:18 Aw Dick <3 The juxtaposition of Dick as a leader compared to Sobel who sure he might be honing them into something formidable and skilled but he’s an asshole. He’s not a leader. He’s a bullying, abusive scumbag. Dick is an actual leader who protects them and supports them and encourages them and IHAVEALOTOFFEELINGSOK
12:43 You don’t deserve that sick jacket, Ross. Seriously. That is a boss jacket, I want it
13:04 Have they not stopped fucking working out all this time? Ugh
13:23 Oh good, Dick gets a boss jacket too. He deserves it.
13:30 I wish people had to ask me for permission to speak.
13:53 I just. He. I can’t with Dick Winters, you guys. I cannot. I have lost the ability to can. Like they’re so upset and tired and low and just with that little joke he boosts their morale back up from where Sobel fucking beat it down into the mud and makes everything lighter and they laugh and are less tense and I just. Fucking love you, Dick.
14:00 Is that my angel son? I see you Shifty, love you baby
14:03 RICH. DON’T TOUCH MY RICH.
14:07 Oh my God, address them yourself you weirdo, Ross. They’re right there, you’re right there! I had a colleague that used to do the same, would get me to speak to my employees for her when they were right there in front of her like… ‘can you tell x to do y for me pls…’ … I was like wtf you know you CAN talk to them… you won’t catch poor just by speaking to people lower down the pecking order
14:22 Fassy! Wtf they’re not supposed to drink? Dehydration is legit one of the most dangerous things, how tf can you turn them into high-key supersoldiers if they’re dehydrated? How is this man so dumb? The guy in front of Fassy tho omg. I bet Fassy’s boss wife Alicia Vikander won’t like her husband being treated that way… she’s so badass tho right?
14:26 He’s so dramatic! Ugh
15:11 Piss off omg
15:24 oh my DVD flipped its shit here, only picked back up at 16:30 don’t @ me
16:52 RICH WHAT ARE THEY DOING TO YOU RICH
17:21 Shifty my angel son
17:46 so sweet
18:04 Sink, babe, no he is the worst, stop
18:20 LOL no, he’s jel as fuck babe
18:32 NO FUN ALLOWED. Im sorry, that tie is so ugly
18:44 Simon Pegg??!!
18:51 Ross is so dramatic God shut up. it’s not a conspiracy, weirdo
19:10 “It’s a can of peaces, sir.” Iconic.
19:11 Dick’s tiny smile is equally iconic.
19:17 SHUT UP ROSS
19:44 He wants to be punched, I think, like he’s goading them. The sick fuck.
20:47 DON’T TRUST HIM, DICK!
21:02 ROE <3
21:31 Hoobler, aw <3
21:37 I warned you not to trust him, boys
21:54 Ah boys, oh no
22:04 RICH. Kick him, baby
22:17 Bull, punch him, seriously
22:24 Oh Luz <3
22:26 Yeah GTFO, suck it, bitch
23:06 Who is this? Fella’s hot
23:40 RICH. FASSY. WEB. TAB.
24:19 Suck it, Ross
24:30 Real footage?
24:41 Lol you suck Ross
25:23 RICH. SMOKING RICH.
25:26 Bill omg
25:45 Perco, baby, no. don’t talk to Johnny Martin. Don’t look at Johnny Martin. Don’t so much as think about Johnny Martin. He will fuck you up with his gaze alone, baby
25:56 Ah Luz
26:06 OK. That’s hot. Joe/Charlie don’t be hot. It confuses me
26:42 Winnix being husbands in the corner
27:42 YOU’RE in the wrong position, dumbass, it’s no one else’s fault
27:46 Dick’s come to save the day
27:56 Ross knows nothing omg
28:05 RICH. Even my Rich is confused, Ross, you dweeb
28:20 Lol at Dick dropping down ready for a fight
28:36 Fassy isn’t happy. That means Alicia Vikander is coming for you. Joe/Charlie is definitely not happy. Lip is upset. Think about your life, Ross, think about your choices. You know you’ve failed when Roe is judging you
28:57 Nix is like lol where tf is the alcohol tho
28:59 Harry! Harry is here! But yes, baby, you’re interrupting the husband’s foreplay, leave immediately
30:00 Lol at the Nix vs Ross staredown. Nix won
30:17 RICH. GUYS IT’S RICH
30:33 Do it, Lieb. Drop the grenade. Just don’t upset my angel son Shifty
30:40 He is a literal angel. Don’t corrupt him Lieb
30:59 Nix is having another crack at flirting. “Going my way” so suave omg. Omg stop. No wait don’t
31:09 “I’m not the intelligence officer.” Neither is Nix half the time babe let’s be fair
31:14 “If I told you I’d have to kill you.” Nix is getting better at flirting! He’s been attending flirting 101 classes it seems
31:40 They’re legit such husbands prove me wrong
32:00 He’s not joking, Dick
32:06 Harry’s like oh yay yes please
32:11 Lol Nix
33:03 Ugh. Men. I feel like that hold smells so bad.
33:09 RICH. Naw, Rich is sad he’s missing out on the flamingos.
33:32 Joe/Charlie you deserve a day to commemorate you tbh. I love you.
33:46 “My brother’s in North Africa, he says it’s hot.” Bill is iconic.
34:34 Lieb, honey, don’t, please
34:49 I feel you, random hot guy. Tipper?
35:05 Eyyy this place is nice, let’s all move there.
35:17 Shifty, my angel son, my baby <3
35:26 Yay, Harry gets a boss jacket too!
36:22 Mum and Dad of Easy. I’m low-key living for Lip’s little worried faces.
36:33 THAT JACKET IS SICK AS FUCK I WANT 20
36:38 The fence is there, Ross, because you’re so fucking dumb
36:51 Guys, look, cows
37:06 He’s fucking useless. Hi Simon Pegg.
37:22 RICH
37:25 This whole scene gives me life and waters my crop
37:31 RICH <3. YOU GUYS. I CANNOT STRESS THIS ENOUGH. RICH RICH RICCCCHHHH
37:42 Poor Tip is so done
37:58 Simon Pegg is so confused
38:04 Good job, Tipper, I’m proud of you and your pretty face
38:10 Iconic
38:15 Keep it together Tip
38:54 The hand signals, no, I’d be like BABY. WHAT. I CAN’T UNDERSTAND YOU WTF. I’d last like a millisecond in the military lmao. Does my country even have one? Tbh probably not. Us Kiwis are too chill, cbf’ed with anything. Too busy watching rugby, drinking, and sulking that we can’t afford houses cos our housing market is fucked. But at least we beat Covid *shrugs*
39:06 ILY, old guy. You are the best thing in this episode, aside from Rich
39:22 But wait, there’s more weird Americans hopping out yo’ bushes
39:26 “Bloody hell!” Mood
39:47 “You’ve done it now, yanks, you’ve captured me!” He is such a mood. I love him.
39:54 FUCK OFF ROSS. “Would that be the enemy?” “As a matter of fact, yes.” DICK IS SO VALID I LOVE HIM THIS IS ICONIC.
40:25 Be free, moo-cows
40:40 LAMO GET WRECKED
41:00 Guys imma be straight with you. I’m on my third whiskey lmao.
41:10 Simon Pegg, please refrain from being a douchebag. Leave Dick and his husband to flirt in peace.
41:23 I love how Nix is like instantly suspicious. He knows.
41:39 Worried husband
41:45 “Misspelled court-marital.” Iconic
42:14 Ross, why you lying? So threatened and jel that you gotta lie omg.
42:50 God Damien is freaking hot. Guys.
42:57 Punk bitch Ross.
43:22 Dick is so BDE. It’s fucking hot.
43:30 Ross is shooketh tbh. Punk bitch.
43:36 AH! IT IS HIM! THE GUY FROM LINE OF DUTY S5!
43:50 That underbite must have hurt FJH a lot omg so committed.
44:02 Hey Lip <3
44:09 Johnny Martin has absolute BDE
44:22 God they’re willing to be killed just to not follow Ross. Same tbh.
44:57 This whole scene is BDE.
46:00 But Sink has the most BDE let’s be honest
46:44 The respect for Dick. Even after what they just went through. I AM EMOTIONAL.
46:58 He’s so worried like omg what have my troublesome sons done now
47:09 ROSS WHY YOU ALWAYS LYING??
48:09 Weak
48:24 Yeah, fuck off back to ‘Murica
48:34 Legit, can we acknowledge Ross did a great job (the actor). Really really well done, one of the best performances on the series tbh.
49:48 LMAO GET WRECKED PUNK BITCH
50:06 Dick just wanders about a lot on his own, huh?
50:50 What? What? I understand nothing of what the cockney guy is saying.
50:55 Me too, Hoob, the fuck.
51:00 RICH I SAW YOU
52:19 “Never put yourself in a position where you can take from these men.” Don’t omg I can’t, Dick, I’m weak, I can’t deal with these fucking feelings.
52:36 DAFUQ
52:40 OHHHH I get it. Right. Dick, you’re so smart. It’s a little sad they have to do all that just to get some answers and guidance but tbh it’s probably fair? Gotta be top secret so punk bitches like Ross can’t screw things up.
53:30 Hey Nix. Speak French to me any day.
53:48 Unf.
54:08 LMAO Lieb, how many cigarettes do you need!
54:10 NGL I paused here for a little while.
55:05 We could ALL use some brass knuckles, Joe/Charlie. Mood.
55:25 LOL Lieb is so nosy.
56:15 Oh no
57:00 Luz LMAO
57:10 Oh babies
57:13 Bill LMAO that’s not ice cream, yuck it looks like soup
57:28 God. All that effort. Not just logistically but emotionally, mentally, psychologically, to prepare, just to have it put off. Fuck.
57:38 That movie again. Poor boys.
57:47 That’s actually a really smart move, Johnny.
58:41 Oh no. I would lose it completely. Oh Bill </3
59:11 Naw, Dick dawdling around again
59:49 RICH I SEE YOU
1:00:08 AAAHHHH IT’S TOO CONFRONTING DON’T
1:00:48 NOOO I CAN’T aw Bill
1:01:09 Naww
1:01:16 RIIIIICH
1:01:20 It’s like they’re kiddies on a field trip and Dick is the teacher wrangling them lol
1:01:47 Lol their crap is so heavy Dick has to help pull them up. That’s actually really sweet.
1:01:51 I wish I could hold Rich’s hand
1:02:08 Oh God. I can’t. Like he’s helping them up BUT IT’S ALSO HIS WAY OF SAYING GOOD LUCK AND GOODBYE AND HAVING LIKE A MOMENT TO CONNECT WITH EACH OF THEM I CAN’T LIKE THE EYE CONTACT NO DICK STOP
1:02:19 LMAO at them having to shove each other into the plane
1:02:23 That look between him and Roe. Ugh. Like. You two gotta take care of your boys together. Brotp
1:03:22 Can someone explain the block on that guy’s helmet to me?
1:03:55 I’m sad. And scared. This series is so confronting. I’ve watched in annually since I was like 16 and I’m still so nervous for them.
1:05:37 Rich, I see you! I recognized his chin lmao
1:06:16 God, Dick be careful
1:10:00 This show. The feels. Every time.
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