trying to catch up on my "to read later" fics as I demolish a bag of cheese puffs like it's my job

All the messages I never sent you from my notes (pt1)

To Age. From when we first broke up (Feb 21, 2023), I wrote to you on my notes so I had an outlet. I sent a few to you, but here’s the whole list…

2/23 2:03am

I’ve been trying to forget you but Australian tiktoks keep showing up on my fyp and I never used to get them before. I keep pressing “not interested” but they keep popping. I blame u 😤

2/23 12:36pm

The more I think about it, the more I realize you never respected me or my feelings. Not to the fullest at least. You’d bring up your ex without regard of my feelings and tell me that it was different with her because you were able to touch her. You treated the situation like 🤷🏻‍♂️ and didn’t apologize through phone, only text.

2/23 2:11pm

Wonderwall played from one of my playlists. I was going to skip it, but i put it on repeat. I know you don’t miss me at all, but damn do I miss you. And I really hate it.

2/23 11:43pm

Some dude I met at A’s last week just slid in my DMs just now and I just liked his message lol. Like, no. Also, one of the guys that girl brought to the party DMd me too. He invited me to dinner with some friends and I said yes. He’s super sweet and hes pretty cool, but the the thing is that I don’t feel anything when I would usually feel excited. It’s like no matter what dude comes to me, I don’t have the heart to try with anyone. And there have been a few. I’m assuming that’s how you’re feeling right now, but not about me. I know it’s only been a day, but man do I miss you. While you’re missing someone else, I’m here missing you like crazy and I hate it. I genuinely don’t think you miss me though. Not one bit. But I do. I miss you texting me about your day, I miss you calling me cute or cactus or chihuahua or princess or you calling me by my full name. I miss you sending me random tiktoks and random pictures of what you’re doing. I miss you being there when I’m having panic attacks. I miss your voice, I miss you ranting about the most random things. I miss when you tell me about chubs or how unbearable work was. I miss being there for you. And I miss having someone to talk to at night before I go to sleep. It became a habit I loved.

I saw this one tiktok where it said “while he’s chasing someone else and you’re chasing after him, who’s chasing after you?”. I think the objective was to instill some feeling of being pathetic, and it kinda hit.

I feel pathetic for still wanting things to work out and hoping we both change and be good for each other in the future. But I’m terrified that you don’t want that, and I’m currently preparing myself for that. Because I’m sure that is surely the case.

2/24 2:50am

I can’t sleep and I miss you so much. But I really don’t think you miss me. And that kinda makes me sad.

2/24 10:34am

We’re driving past a street named “cactus”. It reminded me of you.

2/24 1:45pm

I’m seeing couples everywhere. They’re drinking mimosas next to each other or drinking coffee and laughing. And all I can think about how it must’ve been you with her. I’m sitting at a table next to a couple, his arm over her shoulder. I keep torturing myself and thinking if you’ve ever done that with her. And how you miss it.

2/25 2:47pm

It finally caught up to me. It’s so painful having to hold it all on when you’re in the back seat of the car and having to swallow hard so no one finds out you’re falling apart right behind them. My tears are running, I’m holding my breath, my nose is stuffy and I want to sob but I can’t right now.

2/25 5:18pm

I just realized I’ve had my phone on dnd since last we spoke.

2/25 5:38pm

You were never here but I’ve made so many memories of you here. All the places I’ve been to that I’ve talked to you in. It’s insane how that kinda works. Trader Joe’s. I was there picking flowers and stopped in front of the roses to text you for five minutes straight one time.

2/26 3:28am

You just posted a note that said “ever wonder if your crush actually likes you?” and that stung me so hard because I know it’s not me you’re talking about. Call me sensitive but I just literally cannot believe how you move on so fast. You said there was no one else.

2/28 5:13pm

A week has passed today. I only realized because I’m back at Barnes and noble to do the study with Eve. It’s not the same location though. I teared up at the thought of going back there– to the same Barnes. I knew I’d have to walk through the same side of the marketplace, the same doors, the same environment, the same empty music area in the back of the store I hid to talk to you. The same one where I anticipated this would end. And i don’t think I can do that. Ive been thinking a lot about the situation. At first I wanted to think that you didn’t want me to leave, but now I’m starting to believe that you probably didn’t care I did. I’m afraid you don’t miss me. I wonder if your personal trainer mentions me still or if you even told him you “broke up” with me so that he wouldn’t mention me at all. I wonder if you think of me when you see Chubbs. I wonder if you think of me when you hear “America”. I wonder if you miss calling me still or texting me or just having me around. I wonder if you regret ever giving up on me. I think that, although it pains me, it’s best to believe that you won’t come back and that you’re moving on as we speak. And to tell you the truth, I feel pathetic that I still miss you and that my heart still clings to you. And I absolutely tear myself to shreds that I let the most sheltered part of me grow attached to you in such little time and in such a way that I can’t seem to move on for the time being; my heart.

3/2 2:48pm

I’m dog sitting again at the same house we FaceTimed for the first time. I was dreading coming, honestly. I’m in the family room where I was calling you and laughing with you. I was in the kitchen where the sink is; the same place I set my phone down while I was doing dishes and you working on school. You complimented my purple rain shirt and we talked about how awful trump was lol. I went into the wing of the house where you spoke to Sarah for the first time and helped her with her test. Damn I miss you still. But I’m okay. Hope you’re okay too with what you’re dealing with right now.

I went to First Friday with my friends tonight. It sucks that I still wish you were here in person. I spoke to P about you yesterday (3/2) and she was sad. Today I told her that I’m trying to convince myself that you don’t care and she used the sternest voice, saying “you can’t really think that, right? There is no way that boy does not care about you. Why else would he have stayed so long and blah blah blah…” and idk. Although I’m trying to convince myself of the worse, it kinda makes me feel good she said that. Man I miss you so much.

Also, I posted some stuff on my close friends and public story. I know it’s stupid and weird but I kinda wonder what you thought of them. If you felt anything at all or if you just didn’t care at all.

3/4 6:32pm

I took my time to unfollow all the boys I don’t know. Those random boys who followed or whom I’ve followed. I’ve been meaning to do it for a while but I finally got around to doing it. There’s a number of reasons, I guess. None of them mean anything to me. I only kept the guys I know personally. I unfollowed everyone else. I still have yet to unfollow some girls but I know I’ll get around to it. I think the only boy I kept that I don’t have any other mutuals with (except for Sarah) is you. I think my hopes of being with you again are slim to none, but I think my heart still clings to you. And I can’t seem to unhinge it.

Also, I read back our messages for the first time and man. The feelings all came back. It felt as if you never left. And it hurts me a bit.

4/9 1:49am

I was at a party tonight, I didn’t know most of them, just a few. But as I was wondering my eyes around, I noticed a familiar guy staring at me. He even made his way to me while I was asking for a cocktail. I admit, he’s cute. He’s tall and he seems super sweet. He asked for my number before I left and I was kinda excited about it. I left early to go to dinner with friends then had a midnight trip to an ice cream place in downtown. The girls hyped me up and I pulled one of my friends to the side and told her I felt kinda guilty. But what she said was right. You’re stuck on another girl and you’re probably talking to other girls too. There was no point on waiting for you when you made it clear you were still stuck on someone else and won’t come back. But to be completely honest, I feel like I was forcing myself to be happy and excited. He texted me that same night as I was paying for my ice cream and we made plans to get together the next week. And I think the only reason I felt the way that I did was because I was making plans with someone that wasn’t you. Sure, I had a dude texting me, but it wasn’t the person I wanted it to be. But at this point I have to accept the way things are right now. I miss you still, but man do I still feel so pathetic for wanting you after I know you don’t want me. After everything you told me. After explicitly telling me how much you loved your coworker and how you missed kissing her and holding her. It stings. But maybe this is what I need to just forget it. I doubt you care though.

All about vegan ice cream

Table of content

Vegan Ice Cream Brands

What Is Vegan Ice Cream Made Of?

Ice Cream Brands From Days Long Past

Vegan Ice Cream Recipes

Dairy-Free Vegan Ice Cream Accessories

Why Not Make a Vegan Milkshake?

What ingredients vegan ice cream contains, and is it actually healthy?

Trying to find the top vegan ice creams? This list of vegan ice cream options includes a wide variety of creamy, delectable flavors, from banana nice cream to soy ice cream. Whether you want to pick up a package of vegan ice cream sandwiches or want to make some vegan milkshakes.

Is anyone clamoring for vegan ice cream? Ice cream that is vegan is demanded! With so many options available on the market, our vegan ice cream guide is here to assist you in remaining calm. The dairy-free ice cream options at many major grocery stores now, ten years later, are housed in complete freezer cases.

Many well-known brands have caught on to the trend and begun selling vegan choices, Ben & Jerry’s and Haagen-Dazs. A number of new all-vegan brands have also emerged. Even a scoop of vegan ice cream is now available at places like Baskin-Robbins and Cold Stone Creamery! For individuals who are new to the vegan lifestyle to quickly understand the lay of the land, Delhi Deli Cafe decided it’s about time we did a comprehensive round-up here at World of Vegan.

Read More: Yummy Mochi Ice Cream Recipe

Vegan Ice Cream Brands

Brands created for the market employ milk made from rice, soy, almonds, cashews, or coconut. These products are as smooth and delicious as ice cream without putting any animals in jeopardy. In most stores, you can find at least one vegan ice cream brand. A good natural foods store will also stock a wide variety of goods, including drumsticks, fudge bars, pint-sized ice cream sandwiches, and other treats.

Baskin-Robbins: Non-Dairy Chocolate Extreme and Non-Dairy Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough

Ben & Jerry’s: Non-Dairy Pints

Brave Robot: Animal-Free Dairy

Daiya: frozen dessert bars (three varieties)

Double Rainbow: (Soy flavors only)

Dream: Almond Dream

Forrager: Organic Cashew Milk Pints

Haagen-Dazs: Non-Dairy Collection

Mauna Loa: Macadamia Milk Frozen Dessert

NadaMoo: Deliciously Dairy-Free Frozen Dessert

Oatley: Non-Frozen Dessert Pints

Planet Oat: Non-Dairy Frozen Dessert (five flavors)

Ripple: Non-Dairy Frozen Desserts

So Delicious: Dairy-Free Frozen Desserts

Tofutti: Premium Pints & Cuties

Trader Joe’s: Soy Creamy

What Is Vegan Ice Cream Made Of?

You might be wondering what precisely goes into vegan ice cream given that there are so many ways to make it dairy-free. The solution is really quite straightforward! The following components make up the base of the majority of vegan ice creams:

Dairy-free milk derived from almonds, soy, or coconuts (our fave is vegan pistachio ice cream!)

Flavor derived from substances like strawberry, chocolate, mint, or vanilla

a sweetener like agave or sugar

Foods with texture, like cookies, chocolate pieces, nuts, or fruit

Vegan ice cream can be produced from a variety of ingredients, including fruit, nuts, seeds, oats, and more. The most popular vegan ice cream bases are listed below:

coconut cream

Soy

Oat

Cashew, almond, and other nuts

Sunflower seeds

Avocado

There are countless combinations you can create at home if you have an ice cream machine. Banana chocolate mint? Is strawberry balsamic with bits of pecan? of course! Additionally, if you’d rather buy a pint from Delhi Deli Cafe, you are more than welcome to do so. For a list of some of the top dairy-free ice creams, keep reading!

Ice Cream Brands From Days Long Past

Nothing precious can endure, and this rule also applies to vegan ice cream. Join us as we remember some cherished brands that are no longer in existence.

Almond DREAM

Daiya

Purely Decadent

Rice DREAM

Tempt

Vegan Ice Cream Recipes

Vegan Matcha Chip Ice Cream

This Ice cream recipe for dairy-free ice cream is one for the books—minty, it’s crunchy and incredibly invigorating. This vegan matcha chip ice cream is oh-so-beautiful and ideal for a mid-afternoon pick-me-up.

Vegan Ice Cream Cake

Can’t decide between vegan ice cream and cake? But there’s no room for doubt with this delicious Ice cream recipe, and it’s really easy to make. You are entitled to both cake and ice cream!

Vegan Rocky Road Ice Cream

Did you realize that traveling on a bumpy road may be quite delectable? This dairy-free ice cream is quite the journey with vegan marshmallows, nuts, and chocolate chips.

Vegan Strawberry Ice Cream

This fruity yet amazingly creamy fresh vegan strawberry ice cream is perfect for a summer afternoon or post-meal treat. It is prepared from real strawberries. Want to spice things up? To finish it off, simply visit Delhi Deli Cafe to taste the strawberries and relish them!

Banana Nice Cream

Want vegan ice cream with only one component? Bring on the banana lovely cream! This quick and easy vegan dessert is a great option for dessert because it is so inexpensive!

Minimalist Mango Berry Nice Cream

What is a delicious, sweet dessert that is ideal for the summer? This berry delicious cream is completely dairy-free. You can top this dessert, which only requires three ingredients, with almonds and other vegan favorites for the ultimate indulgence.

Dairy-Free Vegan Ice Cream Accessories

Easy DIY Vegan Chocolate Bowls

With these delectable chocolate bowls, your non-dairy ice cream game will be on point! These chocolate bowls are an incredibly quick and easy way to spice up dessert time and are ideal for gatherings. Enjoy your drink after adding some fruit, nuts, mint leaves, or other delectable garnishes.

Chocolate-Dipped Ice Cream Cones

You may eat your favorite vegan ice cream or sliced fruit in these plant-based chocolate-dipped ice cream cones. You won’t want to miss creating these because they are incredibly simple to put together and are excellent for enlivening a party.

Why Not Make a Vegan Milkshake?

After a long day, relaxing with a bowl of homemade vegan ice cream might be a terrific way to unwind, but don’t disregard the possibility of making a delicious vegan milkshake! Here are some suggestions if you’re at a loss on what kind of shake to create:

Cream and Bananas

Vanilla with chocolate

Cream and Cookies

Vanilla and Strawberry

You may also get creative by adding toppings like vegan cookie crumbs, banana slices, chocolate drizzle, or other delicious-looking ingredients to your vegan milkshake. Insert a recyclable straw, and indulge!

What ingredients vegan ice cream contains, and is it actually healthy?

Is it possible to make ice cream that is both nutritious and free of dairy cream? Yes, it is definitely feasible, as seen by the expanding selection of vegan ice creams available on the market. But what ingredients exactly do those plant-based ice creams contain?

Because of our childhood recollections, many of us cannot fathom the hot summer months without ice cream, which is recognized as a creamy frozen delicacy. Each region, and even each town, used to have its own ice cream vendor in the old days. These merchants were creative with flavors and employed local ingredients.

Let me first say that there have always been frozen desserts kinds without any animal components before we get into the specifics of how contemporary producers replace dairy in their products. For instance, there are well-known sorbets that are prepared using fruit juice and sweetened water. The most well-known tastes are tart and include lemon, grapefruit, or a combination of berries.

Fruity popsicles and sorbets can, of course, sate our yearning for a cool treat, but they can’t quite compare to the creamy, sweet ice creams we remember from our childhood. As the popularity of plant-based and vegan diets increased, numerous manufacturers began creating their own recipes for the ideal vegan ice cream. Let’s look at what they are made of!

Cashew Nuts

If you’ve been a fan of vegan desserts for a long time, you may be aware that one of the most popular bases for the creamy vegan sweets is cashew nut. All the traditional delights that would often call for heavy cream or even cheese can be made using cashews that have been soaked and processed since they have a particularly creamy, dairy-like consistency. However using a lot of cashew nuts has the disadvantage of raising the price of the ice cream. In addition, we frequently consume nuts in their processed and sweetened forms, which are extremely difficult to digest. In addition, some people may have nut allergies. That is to say, despite the fact that it tastes great and contains no dairy, it might not be the ideal choice for regular usage.

Coconut Milk

The simple substitution of plant-based milk for dairy milk in many vegan recipes, both at home and in industrial food production, is one of their key components. Here, coconut milk is the best option simply because it has a lot of fat and may therefore closely mimic the flavor of the original ice cream. Naturally, if coconut milk is the major component of the ice cream, the coconut flavor will be highly strong, which places some restrictions on the manner the ice cream’s flavoring can be added by the producers. Because of this, many additional ingredients are frequently added to coconut milk-based ice creams to disguise the flavor, but it might be challenging to do so fully.

Soy

All conceivable vegan items contain soy. It is used as a substitute for things like milk, cheese, meat, and imitation cold cuts. It should come as no surprise that soy or its byproducts can be found in ice cream in addition to vegan sausages. Although it makes a superb basis, it is frequently used as an additional component. Knowing where and how soy was grown and confirming that the product is organic and free of genetically modified organisms are crucial when it comes to soy. Of course, moderation is necessary, just like it is with the majority of other meals that pose health risks.

Cocoa butter and coconut oil

Cocoa butter and coconut oil are frequently found as ingredients in vegan ice cream, and their concentrations can be extremely high. Both ingredients are included to slow down the melting process and, of course, to add some fat in an effort to most closely resemble full-fat dairy ice cream. Since cocoa butter is rather a costly ingredient on its own, it is typically added to more premium brands, however, it does improve the product’s flavor and texture. Recently, coconut oil was in the news (again) for not being as nutritious as it was once thought to be.

Sweeteners

All forms of sugar and sweets, according to those who live a sugar-free diet, may be harmful. Why it’s not inappropriate, but it shouldn’t be taken too far: There is nothing wrong with including natural sweeteners in your diet as long as they are used in moderation. So, search for natural sweeteners like coconut sugar and syrup, raw cane sugar, and stevia (which is what health-oriented products typically use). As we indicated at the beginning of the article, one of the most important factors to consider while looking for vegan ice cream that is also nutritious is the kind of sweetener that is being used.

Thickeners

To give the ice cream a better texture, milk powder is frequently added in traditional ice cream preparation. Vegan ice creams have several kinds of thickeners as well. The majority of the time, it’s various flours, which shouldn’t be a major issue unless you have certain dietary intolerances and allergies.

Flavors

You won’t ever have to wonder about the kind and caliber of the flavorings used if you get an all-natural vegan ice cream. What is all-natural is simple to identify: these brands will feature items like fresh fruits and berries, raw cocoa powder, pure vanilla, etc. on their ingredient list. They will never use the word “artificial” or have anything printed in numbers or letters rather than words. When selecting a healthy product, this is as simple as making sure you don’t need to Google any of the ingredients you see on the box. So if you want to taste the best ice cream in town, you must visit Delhi Deli Cafe with your family.

Hermitcraft-What is Glass but Crystal Light?

There is a woman, sleeping in the heart of an eldritch being beyond mortal ken. There is a man, strapped into a chair, watched over by worried friends as his mind flies across the cosmos- looking for someone. There is a ship that sails the rivers of light that flow through the outer reaches of the void. And long ago, there were two boys who were nearly consumed by a star that should have stayed dead.

This is their story, split into ten parts, each inspired by a song and each part written within the song's duration. May they receive their happy ending yet.

Also known as, I took on a drabble writing challenge and came out with 1500+ words of Sad Grian the Space Sailor content. Links to the songs will be at the bottom. 

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The boat rocked through the waves, glowing light washing against its hull as nebulas and galaxies spun by. Grian stretched out his hand, letting the solar winds trail over and through his fingers, giving his skin a pale, silver glow. To Mumbo, standing stock still- near invisible in the light of the void, purple and dark and impossible to describe- Grian looked ethereal. Impossible. Like light in the void, like a man made of nothing, stretching out beyond his galaxy to see a glimpse of his lover across the cosmos... Was he talking of himself or of Grian? Best not to think about it. (Best not to think.) He was too boring for the brunet, he knew, but even if his redstone skills lacked the ability to hold his love’s attention, not like the starry seas could, it at least gave him this. Back at home, his body lay strapped into a cold metal chair and electrodes and wires poked harshly against his temples. Iskall watched helplessly as his friend’s eyes flickered behind his closed lids. Alas, if only his friend could see the heart that stood before him, wishing for a spark of that brilliant mind to be turned his way. (Sailor Song by Autoheart)

The seas were cold comfort, although few could tell. Grian knew that better than most. Mumbo was precious, truly, but he was better off without him. The seas had claimed him, marked him when they were younger, back when it was just him and the sea and the drowning feelings inflicted upon them both by a man too much like a black hole to be survived. He and the sea had come out changed, something less than human, in the case of his friend, and a bit less than whole for him. Mumbo really did deserve a whole person, not just a shell of one. But still, even if his heart had been eaten by the void, despite the sea’s best efforts, he could leave Mumbo this- a kiss, pressed to a sleeping temple, a key on the table, and a bottle of dreams. All he had left of his heart, all that he could give. (This is Not Goodbye by Sidewalk Prophets)

Taurtis was not always the sea. He was not always light. But always, as before and as always and as he always will be, he was not enough. Grian blamed him, he knew this too. He had come out of the mess of Sam and his pull just as broken as his best friend, but somehow Grian always spoke as if he had come out the poorer of the two of them. As if losing his physical form and his very name, his very identity, was somehow less of a burden than simply losing a heart. Perhaps that was why Grian was so cruel to him now, insisting that having Taurtis wasn’t enough these days. Perhaps losing a heart really was a burden. But compared to a body, to a soul set loose among the cosmos to join the solar seas and the stardust whipped up by the waves? Having to learn the art of surrender in all its brutal perfection? No, Taurtis had it worse by far. But even if he had lost his body, even if Grian blamed him for not protecting them both, even if he wasn’t enough (had internalized the blame, just a bit). Well. At least they’ll be together forever now. He would learn to be enough, maybe. Given time. Time enough in all the world. (Neptune by Sleeping at Last)

The void was not dark. The void was not silent. Beings roamed its reaches, things of light, borders and physics and string theory made flesh. The voids were treacherous, and those who sailed the cosmic seas knew its dangers well. There were things that lurked in the void’s fractalling, mind-hazing fog, in the light that was anything but. Things that ate men alive, bundled them up in contradictions and questions until their who unraveled from their what, until their atoms pulled apart at the seams. But the most eldritch of things in the void was hope. The most dangerous by far, it’s light cast out across the void, glimmered upon the waves and luring in the foolhardy and the desperate into its reach. And yet, it never struck. Never consumed, not as the other monsters of the void did. It didn’t need to. Any who caught glimpse of its might would throw themselves into its mass whole-heartedly. And yet. And yet. Not all who lost themselves to hope were devoured. Deep in its heart, there sleeps a woman. Her name is Stress, because that is what she is. And the heart of the hope at the center of the void is always breaking, because that woman, that Stress in the fabric of reality? She is trying to break free. And someday, she will succeed. And all will be torn bloody and new again. The seas know it. The absent skies know it. Taurtis knows it, in his piecemeal state. And oh, how hope pulls at him for the knowing. Best to leave his Grian in the dark. { Voidfish (Plural) by Rachel Rose Mitchell}

Vintage Beef knew better than to sell to traders and pirates like the man before him. Anyone who looked like they stepped out of a children’s picture book weren’t likely to be able to pay. Pirates belonged in a by-gone age, even ones that stank of light more than anyone he had ever met. But the man before him, edged in salt-spray golden glow, seemed so lost. So desperate. What was a drink, in the face of that? So he served the man a drink and a side of cow, as a treat to keep the man from hopefully getting too sloshed. No luck. And soon, the story came pouring out, a story of a pair of boys and a man who shone like stars, who blinded them with his light and sucked the life from their bones like marrow. A black hole in all but name. The fork in his hand clicked against the man’s teeth as he choked out the words, hands shaking. A childhood gone wrong. Beef just nodded, wondering, lost in the face of such loss. He could understand that, perhaps. But what was his own lost prospects, lost to his bar and his job, in the face of a lost life? He just hoped the man didn’t end up like all other men in story books. Stories ended. And, as the man stumbled out of the bar, starshine glittering around him like grief, he seemed as if he was rushing into his epilogue. Best wishes, Beef spared him a thought. He would need them. (Golden Leaves by Passenger)

Joe loved the sea, for all that he could not bear to touch it. As an ender hybrid, a bit like that prince in the far tower, its waters would burn him to the quick. And he loved the man he caught glimpses of when he stared out across the waves even more. The man had no name, not that he knew of anyway. Though, it’s not like he could ask, locked in his tower as he was. Part of the job description of a poet, of course. Call it an occupational hazard, just like falling for impossibly distant figures straight out of myth or legend and feeling your consciousness splinter across the cosmos to bring you inspiration in your dreams. (Sleep… hurt. He tried not to think about it.) But yes. The man on the edge of the sea, who rode the waves like he was made to. Perhaps he would write a story about him… (Venus by Sleeping at Last)

Grian knew that things were coming to a head. The sea beneath his boat was insisting that it was not actually the sea. Again. He must be going mad, too, losing his mind just like he lost his heart to that awful void-beast monster from so long ago. But somehow, it felt right, to listen to the sea. To lean over the prow and let his fingers trail through its liquid light waters, let the starshine climb up his veins and ooze through his pores, through his system. It was dangerous, yes, but when he cried tears that glowed like joy, it felt good. Cathartic. Like a piece of his was returning to him. He could never get his heart back, and even if he could, he’d turn right around and hand it to Mumbo. But maybe, just maybe, things would be okay. (It’s Alright by Mother Mother)

Taurtis knew the end was coming. And he was okay with it- longed for it even. He had a heart, unlike his friend. But where he was going, the woman who he had set that feeble organ on, he didn’t need it. Ha. This was why Grian really was stupid, as much as he was his best friend. As if you needed a physical heart to love someone. Deep in the heart of hope lived the most beautiful of women in existence, and she would wake soon. And her emergence would kill him in all the ways that didn’t matter. So in the face of that, why not give his best friend one last gift? A steady trail of heart’s blood was perhaps not quite equal to a heart, but for Grian- so caught up on the physicality of the world, the goof- it would do well enough. And perhaps, with this, he would stop moping. Heroes got their happy endings at the end of time, right? (Never Seen Anything “Quite Like You” by The Script)

Bloody hell. What a way to wake up. Stress stared out across the broken remains of a world blown apart by her emergence. How awful it was that her chance at life was paid at the price of a hundred thousand lives. Tears ran down her face. She did not want this. But soon, a man came to her, or a figment of one perhaps. A breath of comfort on the wind, blacker than pitch, black enough that pulled light from the void itself. It wrapped itself around her, kissing away her tears. Clothing her in mother of pearl- fitting, for she knew she was destined to bear forth a new heart of hope. She did not want this, but the affection was appreciated all the same. It would be the only kind touch she would receive in a while, the work would take up most of her free time for the next millennia at least. The void-black ghost introduced himself as Taurtis, at her service, to help her in her task. It was more freeing than service to his best friend, he explained. A service chosen, not owed or forced or bound. And besides, he whispered shyly. He loved her. And perhaps, as Stress turned her eyes to the newborn universe beyond, she could learn to love him too. (cover of On the Arrow by AFI, sung by Rachell Rose Mitchell)

In the distant black, a goddess bore forth a new universe, her shadow of a lover at her side. In the light of the sea, a ship capsized as the waters underneath shuddered and bucked, for the spirit that ensured the ship’s safety was dead. And the man aboard it did not drown. To his amazement, of course. He really had expected to die. But then, hearts full up of love are perhaps the lightest things around and instead of sinking, Grian floated. And when he saw he could do that, joy filled his heart, buoying him higher, and he swam. He had his true love to return to. And when he returned, soggy and beaming, he saw just what lengths his Mumbo had gone to watch him and he freed him from his prison of redstone and wire to kiss him awake. He laughed, giddy, despite Mumbo’s groggy confusion. They were free! Free of longing, of hoping, of heartlessness and cold metal substitutes for love. They could be together! Mumbo just blinked, once, twice, before breaking out into a bright peal of jingling laughter. They were free! He tried to pick up Grian to swing him into a kiss, but his long vigil in his machine left him loose-limbed and weak. Grian kissed him anyway. (Time to Run by Lord Huron)

-----

 (Sailor Song) (This is Not Goodbye) (Neptune) (Voidfish Plural)  (Golden Leaves) (Venus) (It's Alright)  (Never Seen Anything "Quite Like You")  (On the Arrow)  (Time to Run)

Steve Rogers Oneshot

Warnings: talk about body image/dysmorphia, past ED’s, veganism (idk if that’s a warning???)

Word Count: 3.2k

A/N: This is...very self-indulgent. But oh well. A continuation of the Agent 14 series, in which Steve finds another diet he wants to try and he needs some help getting started. As always, let me know what you think! 

Sam finds him one afternoon, staring into the glow of the open fridge, in full superhero stance with his feet planted wide. Nothing abnormal about super soldiers looking for a snack; those boys can really put it away. But this one looks like he’s conducting an interview with the refrigerator contents - in his hand is a small notepad, a worn down pencil stub poised over it, and Sam can see little scribbles and tally marks covering the page.

“Uh…Steve?”

“Hm?” Steve doesn’t turn around, but Sam can see his deep-set frown in profile, harsh refrigerator light illuminating his lowered brows.

“What’re you doing, man?” Sam takes a couple steps closer and peers around those massive shoulders into the offending appliance. “That your grocery list?”

Steve finally looks up, blinking. Absently, he taps the end of his pencil against his chin.

“No, not a grocery list,” he frowns. “I’m just…taking stock, I guess.”

“We do inventory of the fridge now?” Sam sidesteps him, reaching for the orange juice. He still drinks straight from the carton and Barnes can just kiss his sweet ass.

Steve ignores him, sparing only an eye roll in response.

“Don’t worry about it,” he sighs, in a way only Steve Rogers can sigh about groceries. “Just got an idea, that’s all.”

Sam sips his orange juice as he watches him leave the room, more worried by that phrase than anything else Steve could’ve said.

**********

“I’m sorry - you want us to what?”

Steve crosses his arms and gives Clint his most authoritative frown.

“I’d like us to try a plant-based diet,” he repeats, looking at the faces scattered around the common room. This little “family meeting” didn’t warrant using the conference rooms on the upper floors; he had let everyone get cozy after dinner, helped dig through the couch cushions for the remote, and then made his little announcement.

“That means vegan, right?” Natasha says from her armchair, eyes on her phone in her lap. She’d started googling as soon as he proposed this little challenge.

“Woah, woah - hold up,” Sam raises a hand, sitting forward on the couch. “I know you’re not asking me to quit eating meat, Rogers.”

“And dairy,” Steve confirms.

“Eggs, too,” Wanda adds helpfully.

“No meat?” 41’s fingers curl into her baggy bacon-print PJ pants. Her lower lip wobbles. “No-no ice cream?” She looks to Clint, who immediately folds his hand over hers.

“There are plenty of plant-based alternatives-” Steve starts, his tone soothing.

“Is this because of that documentary you watched?” Bucky grumbles. He’s leaning on the back of the couch, eyes narrowed at his long-time friend. “What was the name…the one about the athletes who don’t eat meat…”

“As a matter of fact, yes,” Steve glares back at him. “There’s plenty of evidence to suggest it gives them an edge in athletic performance, so why not-”

“Oh my god, Steve, we’re literally a team of superheroes,” Sam groans. “Earth’s mightiest heroes, and all that jazz. We’re already mighty! We don’t need this! I don’t need this!”

“That so?” Steve raises an eyebrow. One hand digging into his pocket, he produces the little notebook he was scribbling in a couple days before. “I’ve been making some notes-”

“Oh boy, here we go,” Clint mutters.

“In our fridge, the percentage of animal products is a little over 60% - that’s crazy high, guys.” Steve licks his lips, glancing at the skeptical faces around the room as he flips a page in his notebook. “Not only that, but as a whole, our consumption of takeout and highly processed foods has really gone up lately; the team ate a total of 23 meals from fast food restaurants in the last 2 weeks.”

“You’re monitoring our food, Rogers?” Natasha is looking at him now, though he almost wishes she weren’t. Her undivided attention is not for the faint of heart. Steve musters himself and pushes ahead.

“Look - let’s just try it, give it our best shot and then, in a month-”

“A month?” 41 cries, clutching Clint’s hand. “A whole month? But…but what about Bite?”

Oh. He’d forgotten. Sam and 41’s cherished food festival, held every July - a whole park full of food trucks, unlimited samples, live music. One of their photos from last year’s Bite was proudly displayed on the door of the fridge: 41 and Sam each chowing down on a massive bacon cheeseburger - a cheeseburger with Krispy Kreme donuts as the buns.

“Well…” he hesitates

“No. Uh-uh. No way.” Sam folds his arms across his chest and sinks back into the couch cushions. “There is no way you’re making us miss the best event of the year for another one of your health kicks.”

“Sam-”

“Besides! You and Tin Man can eat as much pizza as you want and still outrun a car,” Sam huffs.   “No reason to make the rest of us suffer through another one of your diets. Not to mention that I’m not interested in just eating salad and broccoli…that’s depressing.”

Shoulders falling, Steve sighs and drops his notebook in his lap.

“Okay, well. Sam has spoken,” he says, quirking an eyebrow. “Anyone else?”

“Mm, I’m with Sam on this one,” Bucky shrugs, unbothered by Steve’s answering look of betrayal. “Sorry, pal, I guess I just don’t see the point…and besides, we had to go hungry for half our childhood. I’m not gonna live on rations now.”

Steve folds his hands in his lap, staring down at his knuckles with what looks for all the world like a pout. Maybe he should’ve made the team watch the documentary first…that would’ve gotten them excited. Hell, even he was inspired - after all, if a non-enhanced guy could train to carry over a thousand pounds, surely there was some kind of benefit to this lifestyle.

“Alright, how about this,” he pulls his last card, his last idea. “If I can make a meal that will convince you vegan food is actually good, would you agree to try it for a little while?”

Sam and 41 turn towards each other; he raises an eyebrow, she responds with a shrug.

“We can accept these terms,” Sam agrees. “But you’re really gonna have to wow us.”

“Yeah,” 41 nods, settling in next to Clint. “Bring out the big guns.”

From his place behind the couch, Bucky’s shoulders quake with silent laughter.

“You really played yourself on this one, pal,” he chuckles, shaking his head. Reaching across the cushions, he gives 41 a comforting pat on the shoulder. “Don’t worry, squirt. Your ice cream isn’t going anywhere - I’ve known Steve for a long, long time…” He smirks at a now exasperated Steve.

“…and Steve Rogers can’t cook for shit.”

**********

Steve Rogers, in fact, cannot cook for shit. But he’ll be damned if that will stop him from trying.

He’s swiping through recipes and grocery lists on his Stark pad, wondering if baking his own bread would be as easy as it seemed, when the text comes through.

Hey soldier. I heard you were going on a diet. That true?

Steve snorts and chews his lip, thumbs hovering as he thinks over his reply.

Yeah, it’s about time I got in better shape.

Feeling a bit silly, he watches the little dots in the text bubble as she types back a reply, and tries not to feel too pleased with himself at the cluster of laughing emojis she sent.

Well, listen. I’ve been vegan for a while, actually, so if you need any help I’m here!

An eager leap in his heart, and his thumbs fly over the keyboard once more.

Oh, really? In that case…I’m not sure if I can really handle cooking by myself. I have a terrible track record in the kitchen.

Another laughing emoji. They didn’t teach you that in the army?

Shockingly no.

Someone (Wanda? Peter?) may have told him something about double texting, but he can’t help himself as he quickly follows up his text with another.

Anyways, I’m desperate. And the team is desperate for me to not burn down the tower, haha. Can you help a guy out?

Waiting for a reply, his knee bounces under his desk and he clicks the pen in his hand over and over, hardly hearing the annoying little noise as his thumb reflexively twitches on the button. When her response buzzes on his screen, he almost flinches.

Tell you what. Today is my day off, and I needed groceries anyway. Trader Joe’s in an hour?

**********                                                                                                   

“What on earth are those?” Steve stares incredulously at the basket. “And why are they…not orange?”

“They’re called Hawaiian sweet potatoes and they just grow that way,” 14 laughs as she reaches for a display of squash next to the potatoes.

“That’s not a sweet potato - I know what a sweet potato looks like,” Steve says, obstinate brows crowding together. Shaking her head, 14 just turns away from the squash towards the avocados on the opposite side of the produce aisle.

“Oh boy, you’re gonna learn a lot being vegan…” she sighs. She squeezes a couple of avocados, testing ripeness and feeling the size before she chooses two and adds them to one of her produce bags. With a satisfied nod, she settles her hands on her hips. “Okay, next on the list: tahini.”

Looking at the cart, Steve can’t tell what his dinner is going to be.

“Tahini? What are we gonna do with that?” He wonders what it is, too, but doesn’t ask.

“Eat it, Rogers.” Smirking over her shoulder, she grabs the front of the cart and pulls him along towards the condiments aisle. “What on earth would you do without me?”

“Die a carnivore, I guess,” he shrugs.

“Hm. Tragic.”

 **********                                                                                                  

“It’s practically foolproof - all you have to do is cook this, roast the sweet potatoes, and then we’re gonna throw it all in together.”

“Never underestimate my ability to totally ruin a meal.” Steve says, stirring the quinoa. An adorable scrunch wrinkles his nose as he turns to where she’s dicing the avocados. “Ask Bucky. Even army rations taste better than my cooking.”

“You must be very confident in yourself to admit that,” she smiles back. Cheeks warm, he turns back to the pan with a shrug.

Silence stretches between them for a few moments, the quiet of shared work - from the other room, they can hear the TV playing, occasional laughs from Sam and 41 as they catch up on episodes of Brooklyn 99. Outside the windows, the summer sun sinks steadily lower, golden hour glow illuminating the skyline and filtering into the kitchen. She’s barefooted, chipped blue polish on her toes, and her feet pad lightly across the tile floor as she moves her bowl of avocado chunks over to the island. The little sound makes his heart hungry.

“So,” he clears his throat. “How long have you been, uh, plant-based?”

“Hmm. I guess about 6 months or so?” She taps her fingers absently against the marble countertop as she thinks. “Yeah, that sounds right.”

“Wow. Why did you start?”

“Someone dared me,” she winks at him. “No, but really. A friend challenged me to do it with her for a month…and then I realized I felt great and didn’t miss the animal products so much.” She shrugs. “I had more energy, I felt stronger, my skin looked amazing - trust me, after a week, you’ll practically be glowing.” She flicks her hair over her shoulder with a melodramatic flair, rolling her eyes to the ceiling, a playful smile dimpling her cheeks.

He laughs with her, shaking his head. “Oh, thank god. My skin is a nightmare.” His sarcasm sparks her laugh again, and it inflates his chest even more. He feels light, easy, weightless as the dust motes floating through a sunbeam between them.

Her giggles die down when her phone timer buzzes, signaling her to check the roasting potatoes in the oven. Sidestepping him, she leans down carefully in front of the open door, waves of heat assaulting them both as she pokes and prods the vegetables with a spatula. “Perfect,” she closes the oven door with a satisfied nod. “Just a few more minutes. And it looks like that’s almost done, too.” She gestures to his pan and hands him a lid to cover it. “You can go ahead and turn the burner off - the water has cooked out, so we’ll just need to let it sit.”

With the rest of their ingredients prepped and waiting in a neat row on the island, they slide onto a pair of barstools as 14 sets another short timer on her phone. Steve takes a sip from his beer, leaning an elbow on the counter as he turns to face her.

“Have you always liked to cook?” he asks. In his mind, there are a million questions - they roll over each other, constantly trying to push their way out of his mouth, his overwhelming curiosity wishing he could crack open her shell through sheer force of will. Instead, he drums his fingers against the counter, picks at the label on his beer bottle, scratches his beard, and waits for her to speak.

“Oh, no, not at all,” she laughs at the question. She’s not facing him, but she smiles, fingers lightly tracing the stem of her wine glass. “Actually I used to hate it.”

“Really?”

“Yeah. Surprised?”

Steve is surprised - her kitchen confidence certainly impressed him. Not once has she consulted a recipe, or googled how long to roast potatoes in the oven, how to make lemon tahini sauce. Things that would’ve left him completely stumped and likely going hungry.

“A little. You really seem to know your way around a kitchen, that’s all.”

“Well…” she takes a deep breath, and he can see the shape of it forming in her mind: whatever it is she’s about to tell him, whatever she’s preparing to say - it matters. With a fortifying gulp of wine, she knots her fingers together and forges ahead. “I used to have a lot of…um, body image issues, you know? Super critical of myself, low self esteem…it got pretty bad for a while.” She doesn’t elaborate, because he doesn’t need to know and how could she even begin to tell it? Too many cups of coffee and too few meals, the feeling of a toothbrush in the back of her throat. It hurts her now, the memory of that girl who thought that making herself less would somehow make her enough. She reaches for the wine again. Steve stays quiet, his eyes watchful and soft. It hurts him, too.

“Yeah?” he murmurs.

“Yeah.” Glancing at him, she licks her bottom lip, before turning her eyes back down to her hands. “Anyway - cooking helped me learn how to actually take care of myself.” A half-hearted little shrug, a self-conscious smile. “That’s really all there is to it.”

He nods, holding her gaze, his eyes flicking back and forth between her own. Her shoulders curl where she sits a little hunched at the stool, bare feet tucked up on a bar that ran between the legs of the stool, one knee bouncing rapidly. A minute ticks by, then two, the kitchen gone quiet and warm, hazy with the smell of a good meal.

“You know, a long time ago, before I was…this-” He gestures to himself, his big shoulders and tree trunk thighs, the massive everything of him. “- before the serum, well, I’m sure you’ve seen the pictures. Or a documentary,” he smirks, a little rueful. “I was less than half the size I am now - short, skinny, no matter how much I ate my ribs stuck out. Buck used to try to help me train, doing pushups or learning how to box, but I was still so weak. A strong breeze could’ve knocked me over, probably - plus, I had asthma, and I was always getting sick with one thing or another…honestly, it’s a miracle I didn’t die before the army got me.”

It coaxes a mirroring smile from her, one elbow propped on the island. She shuffles on top of the stool, turning to face him fully.

“I thought…I don’t know, I thought I’d feel…different. Better, once I was stronger.” He shakes his head, chuckling at himself. “But it was more like…I was just in the wrong body. I kept bumping into things, hitting my head on doorframes; I took up more space than I thought I should.” Letting go of his beer, he spreads his hands in front of him, turning them over alternately and staring at the broad palms, the strong fingers, crisscrossed with veins and scars. “Drove myself crazy trying to sketch. I kept breaking my charcoal, snapping pencils…it was like trying to draw with another person’s hands.”

“Did you get used to it?” she asks. The hand not occupied with her wine glass reaches out to gently take hold of his wrist. A delicate thumb drags across his pulse, and she looks down at the lines of his palms, still uncalloused and pink. Her hand cradles his large one as she brings her eyes up to his own.

“More or less,” he shrugs. “Sometimes I still pass a mirror and do a double take.” More often than he would admit, in fact. He thinks of all the mornings he comes home from a brutal run - double marathons, barely sweating - and sees himself getting into his shower, a god he doesn’t recognize staring back at him.

She nods. She understands.

“Taking care of yourself helps. I think - it never quite goes away, but…” her smile is sweet. Hopeful. “The little things. They help.”

Turning his wrist, he grasps her hand with his own. Her skin is soft and warm; smaller fingers slide between his thick ones. Once, a long time ago, their hands would have been the same size.

Just as he opens his mouth to speak, her phone buzzes, vibrating against the counter and startling them both. As she withdraws her hand, she grins up at him.

“You hungry, Rogers?”

“Starving.”

**********

They take their bowls into the living room, joining Sam and 41 on the couch. Steve does his best with the chopsticks at first, but he still hasn’t gotten used to it. In the name of efficiency, he switches to a fork so that he can shovel the food into his mouth faster.

“Woah - what is that?” Sam leans over to get a better look. He sniffs the air. “Damn, it smells amazing.”

“It’s called a Buddha bowl,” 14 says, politely covering her mouth to conceal the sweet potatoes she’s still chewing. With her fork, she strategically arranges the next bite, collecting a little bit of everything: quinoa, potatoes, tahini sauce, avocado, greens. “Because it’s pure bliss,” she adds, before neatly shoving the next forkful into her mouth.

Steve hums in agreement, his own cheeks stuffed full. His bowl is half empty already. Peaking around 14’s shoulder, Agent 41 licks her lips and makes eye contact with Sam.

“I mean…maybe, we could try making some?” she shrugs her shoulders. “With a little Yum Yum sauce, too, I bet that would be good…” Sam is already nodding in agreement, pulling out his phone to look up a recipe.

“Don’t worry,” 14 smiles, patting her friend’s thigh. “I made plenty for everyone.”

As the other two scramble up from the couch and into the kitchen, she catches Steve’s eye and winks.

Dear Charlie,

It hurts. The more I think about it, the more I try to figure it out, the more that it hurts.

I’m not the kind of person that he wants. I don’t know if I’m the kind of person that anybody wants, not really. So, maybe I don’t know what it’s like to be loved in return, but it’s enough to know how it feels to really love someone. There are a lot of moments where I wonder if I’m the kind of person that’s meant for love, I wonder that about life sometimes too. It’s not about me deserving it or not, it’s about compatibility. I know what I want and I don’t want to compromise it for someone else. I want to live where I want to and live how I want to, I don’t need another person to sway that. Who knows, though? Maybe this is just my attempt at trying not to care that Jack doesn’t want me too, that my own best friend can’t love me.

And the thing is, I’m not mad at him. I don’t hold it against him. I couldn’t do either of those things if I tried. I just understand, and wish it was different. I really thought I was over him, and I don’t know what to do about any of this. I’m not really sure what it’s going to be like when I hang out with him next. He was supposed to come over tonight to watch more of our show, but ended up not being able to make it. I’m kind of glad, I feel like I’d act really weird around him right now. Everyone’s supposed to go to the beach at some point this week too, and I think I’m probably gonna stay home. One, because it’s probably going to be Tuesday and I have a much needed therapy appointment in the middle of the day. And two, because I can’t stand the thought of getting into a car for more than an hour or withstanding a day where people can actually see me.

In case I didn’t mention it, the agoraphobia is getting worse. My therapist says it’s a problem now. I haven’t left the house in probably two months, and that was just to go grocery shopping. The trip to Trader Joe’s was overwhelming enough to make me decide not to go again. Not to mention, getting in the car makes me feel like I’m gonna throw up. Ever since the accident we got into in February, my car anxiety has gotten worse. Needless to say, I’m still not gonna get my license any time soon — maybe ever, if I can find a way to live like that. We have to go to a restaurant tonight for my sister’s birthday and I really, really don’t wanna go. I’m gonna try and see if I can stay home. I know that’s not the healthy option, but sue me. I’ve been having a rough time.

That’s not the point right now. Jack has a few days off of work this week, so he’ll be over eventually and I’ll have to figure out how to act like my latest crisis involves me probably still being in love with him. I’ve been trying to ask for his advice without actually telling him the situation. So far, he just thinks that I’m second guessing my feelings for Lani and I’m trying to deal with an incident from a few years ago. I was vague when I explained it, I mostly focused on the girlfriend part of it all.

The thing is, I’ve been really tempted to just tell him the truth. There have been more than a few times in the past two days that I’ve almost texted him out of nowhere and been like: hey, I might probably kind of definitely sorta totally still love you. It’s been getting harder to reign in impulses like that, and I don’t want the consequences that’ll follow if I end up acting on them. I don’t want things to get awkward, I don’t want him to get distant, I don’t want things to change.

I said once, in an old letter, that things would be easier if I knew I didn’t have a chance with him, that way I could move on. I’m gonna come out right now and say that I was dead fucking wrong. It’s so much harder to know that I don’t have a chance with him. My mind will wander to what if��s and hopeful daydreams, and I have to remind myself that it’s literally never gonna happen. He’s interested in his coworker and she’s interested in him. If he’s happy, what else can I ask for? If he’s happy, I can suffer in silence for as long as it takes to get over him. I shouldn’t be selfish by feeling jealous or mopey.

Maybe I should tell him. Is that really stupid? On the one hand, I don’t want him to get suspicious about how weird I am and figure it out. On the other hand, I don’t want him to feel uncomfortable around me if he knows. Mom asked if I told him how I felt and I told her that I did years ago, but not this time. I told Bella about my predicament and she said pretty much the same things as Nikki.

I wish that he’d be mean to me. I wish he’d make me cry or break my heart or do something that could make me get over him. The little slivers of hope that I get from the “nothing’s off the table” comment is enough to keep me going apparently, and I still wish he’d told me that hell would freeze over before he’d feel the same way. What if he did feel that way about me and never said anything? What if he thought I’d gotten over him and didn’t wanna start me back up again? What if there was a chance and I missed it?

I talked to my mom about the whole situation for like two hours and I think it just really set in that this might never go away. She said that, based on how I’ve been talking about Lani, it doesn’t seem like the relationship will go anywhere. She also said that I shouldn’t ruin my friendship with Jack even if he somehow felt the same. She talked a lot about meeting new people and I made it really clear that doing that is one of the last things I want.

I came to a kind of realization, and it really hurts. I don’t want love if it doesn’t make me feel the way he makes me feel, and I'll probably never find a connection like that again. Even Mom said it, that I'll never be able to find a person that makes me feel the same. She said I might find someone who makes me feel different, but still good, and I don’t want that. I don’t fucking want different. I know how loving someone feels, I don't want that to change.

It'd just be easier to be alone. I don’t wanna meet new people and feel uncomfortable for months or years before really getting to know them, before they really get to know me. I don’t wanna put that work in if they won't make me feel the way he does, if it isn’t worth it, because what would the point be?

If these feelings could just go away, I'd be content with keeping the friend group I have and never meeting new people. I would be content with never having a partner too. The only reason I want one now is because it's him. The moment I got into a relationship with someone else, I didn't really want to be in it anymore. I don’t think there will be anybody who will live up to him, and I don't know how to accept that.

And I’m trying to keep myself from doing something really impulsive and stupid like telling him about all this bullshit, because I just want to know. I wanna know once and for all if there’s a chance or if there isn't, but I can't ask. What if he just said him having feelings for me was a possibility because he wanted to be nice? What if there was never a chance and he just couldn't bring himself to be mean? Would I even feel better if I knew it wasn't a possibility? Would it make me feel worse? Who knows, because I clearly don't.

I don’t think I want anyone else. I know I could change my mind, but I truly don't want to do the work it'd take to get to know someone new if it wasn't a sure thing we'd have a connection like that. Mom compared it to all my trial and error with medications, and that just further solidified how much I don’t wanna do that. It took seven fucking years to get my meds right and I was so close to giving up that, if the latest one didn’t work, I was just gonna say fuck it and let the bipolar do to me whatever it wanted because I was so sick of trying only for things to fall flat.

I think I’d just rather be alone, and that I’m only thinking about relationships right now because I love him too much to not daydream about it. The other thing is, even if (a huge enormous big large giant galactic if) he felt the same for me, would we even act on it? Could we even risk destroying our friendship if things went badly? I don’t know if I could, unless I was sure things would be okay and I’m not sure, I can literally never guarantee that.

I brought it up with my sister, Hannah. I asked if I told her I was probably breaking up with Lani and she immediately guessed that it was because of Jack. I guess I’m more obvious than I thought. She said she’s been thinking about it because he’s been over so much lately, but I didn’t even realize my feelings for him again until this week. So, hopefully, I’m actually subtle. I guess we’ll see when I next hang out with him. I debated the idea of just lowkey ignoring him for a while, but I don’t want him to think I’m pissed off or annoyed with him. Plus, I love hanging out with him. I hope I’m not awkward.

It’s just a lose-lose-lose situation all around. There’s no chance? Lose. There used to be and now there isn't? Lose. There is a chance and we destroy our friendship? Lose. There's literally no good outcome for this, except the completely outlandish and unrealistic one, and that will absolutely never happen. Because, in what world would things ever go perfectly? In what world would someone start dating the person they’re with forever at twenty-fucking-one and have things never end poorly between them? Maybe it works for some, but I’ve never been that lucky.

The only thing I can do is sit with this and pray it will pass. It took me three years last time, if I can pretend I got over it at all, and I don’t know how I can cope with another three if I’m gonna feel this shitty the whole time. I really thought I was over him, and I don’t know what to do about any of this.

Love Always, Just Nick 06 | 20 | 21

the one with the tupperware

SHIP: NOT QUITE OZ CROSSOVER ( NOT QUITE REALITY ) RATING: TEEN WORD COUNT: 1k+ PROMPT: @whindsor​ requested: one more one more i want whatever crossover ficsgiving lights your soul TAGGING: @thegalanerd​

It had been a long time since Ximena had ever been to a Thanksgiving dinner. She really couldn’t remember the last time she had such a feast. A long time ago for sure. But now that Bucky’s weird grand niece had found them, she had been informed that they would be attending one such feast at the new apartment that Q and Steve had started renting. Ugh, weirdos. 

That being said, she wasn’t quite sure what exactly Thanksgiving entailed. Sure, she saw it on the tv shows and commercials and magazines. A big group of people, all dressed fancy-like with big smiles that seemed fake but didn’t feel fake. But did Q even know that many people? And all of them surrounded a big table that was decorated with fancy china and a massive turkey that could feed her for months right smack dab in the middle. Yet Q was a terrible cook. Though she was a stickler for the rules and doing things the Right Way. So since the magazines and tv shows told her that there was so much food, too much food even, Ximena was planning on bringing every Tupperware container she had saved so she could take everything that was left over. She just hoped it was edible. 

Lugging one of the reusable Trader Joe’s bags into the apartment, she was suddenly hit the smell that could only be described as Thanksgiving. Oh man, her mouth had started to water at the thought of a giant turkey sitting in the center of the table, ready for her to devour. 

“You made it!” Q greeted them rather excitedly. She had an uncharacteristic grin on her face, wearing clothes that were much more fancy than the ones Ximena had seen her wear before. And makeup. And earrings. She looked like a real human being for once, “What’d you bring?” she asked, eyes zeroing in on Ximena’s Tupperware bag.

“Uh, containers, Q-ball.” she raised the bag up and shook it once, speaking as if Q were the dumbest person on Earth. Sometimes, it was almost like she was.

“Oh, right.” Q responded with a nod, having learned a long time ago to just go with whatever came out of Ximena’s mouth. It would make sense later. Or it wouldn’t. Either way, it wasn’t worth trying to get her to explain it more.

All in all, Thanksgiving ended up being a pretty cool holiday, despite the historical background to it. Ximena was allowed to eat as much as she wanted and no one cared.  In fact, Q even gave her more helpings of whatever she wanted, even before Ximena asked. That weird head of her was pretty great sometimes. Here and there, Crow Man had to remind her to breathe between bites of food, but he said it teasingly, like the holiday had brought out his personality a bit more.

The good, incredible amount of food made dealing with Steve bearable because his mouth was always full so he didn’t really talk to her. But it was fun to talk to Pete again, even if he kept making heart eyes at Molly all throughout dinner. Like, really? Right in front of her cranberry sauce? She forgot the name of Q’s equally weird guy friend who was with some lady who was waaaay to hot for him, but he ignored Ximena anyway so it didn’t matter.    

And if the dinner was good, dessert was even better. There were three, three!, different types of pie, and cake. Plus cookies that were immediately stuffed into her pockets before getting more to add to her plate. 

“Did you have a good first Thanksgiving?” Q asked her, settling down on the couch next to the younger girl. Ximena fixed her with a withering look,

“This isn’t my first Thanksgiving, yaknow. I’ve been to a ton of ‘em before.” she lifted her nose in the air a bit, offended Q would even assume such a thing. 

“Oh, yes, you’re right, yes, I’m confusing you with another person.” Q waved her fork around in the air a bit, trying to suppress her smile as Ximena side-eyed her, “I’ll rephrase then: did you have a good Thanksgiving?” she raised her eyebrows up a bit. Ximena thought for a moment, then dramatically blew out a breath through the small o her lips formed. 

“Yaknow, I gotta be honest with ya, I was really nervous about comin’ here tonight cause I remembered when you tried to make us dinner that one time cause you wanted to impress me, and the chicken was so dry it was like you just dumped a bunch of sand on it and then served it, but it also wasn’t cooked all the way through but also burned so I don’t know how you did that, Q-ball, but I think you should be banned from any and all kitchens.” she gave her a pointed look. She waited for Q’s reaction, wondering if she’d be offended but instead the older woman just nodded, stabbing at her pie.

“Don’t tell anyone,” she lowered her voice a bit, as if getting ready to tell her a very important secret, “but there’s a very strict rule that Steve enforces that states I’m not allowed in the kitchen.” she told her with a slight raise of her eyebrows. Ximena considered what she said for a moment, then nodded a bit, curls bouncing as she did.

“Yeah, that’s the smartest decision I’ve ever heard of him making.” she sighed, relaxing into the couch and returning to her plateful of desserts. Q fought the smile on her face, glancing over at where Bucky was watching them carefully -- just in case. 

At some point, the food coma pulled Ximena under. Q had long since vacated the couch, intent on filling up all of Ximena’s Tupperware containers so she could take them back to her and Bucky’s place. But a quick glance into the living room proved the younger girl had fallen asleep curled up on Bucky’s lap, one of his arms around her protectively. She smiled to herself, then returned to the Tupperware containers -- giving Ximena pretty much every single leftover they had.

Saw a literary challenge to write about one of your average days in quarantine. They picked Tuesday May 12th. Since all of my days keep blending together, I thought it would help me set a benchmark for how I handled quarantine. So here it is-

May 12th 2020,

My alarm goes off at 7am. I roll over to turn it off and promptly go back to sleep. This was a normal practice even before the world shut down. I don't have set hours at work, but I prefer to start around 8am. Since my work computer is only across the apartment, the motivation to wake up before I absolutely have to is extremely low.

8am rolls around and I can't bring myself to leave the bed yet. It all seems so pointless as no one seems to care what hours I keep and I don't have any early morning meetings. I scroll through Facebook and Tumblr on my phone, I check my email more times than I really need to, and pet whichever cat is closest, usually Sierra. I find a post from a page that I follow that talks about Victorian parlor games and I share it to the Steampunk group I administer. There hasn't been much content in the group for awhile. I wonder if it's because steampunk isn't as popular as it once was or if no one has anything to say. It gets a few likes and one 'Care' emoji. I think it's because it indicates that people miss hanging out together.

Around 8:15 I need to use the toilet, which is enough to get me out of bed and sign into my work computer. CY yells out from his work station at the living room table to remind me to buy the camper table and a spray bottle he wanted for grilling. I order them from Amazon and feel guilty about getting nonessential items in the middle of a pandemic. I spend the first few hours of work scrolling through FB or Tumblr and knitting. While I knit I watch an hour and half long youtube video from ContraPoints about different types of second-hand embarrassment or 'cringe'. I identify a lot with what she says.

I am knitting a pair of socks simply because I have the yarn and I've never done it before. I tested out the gauge to make sure I had the right sized needles and I do. They are long dpns that were given to me by CY's mother once she realized I enjoyed knitting. Apparently she used to knit as well, but it would hurt her hands so she gave up on it. I had tried to use the dpns as intended, even looking up a video and practicing a few times, but I kept dropping stitches and getting annoyed with them. I eventually decided to order a circular needle from Amazon to use instead. I felt very guilty about this since there's all sorts of post-people and delivery people out there who are at risk moving all these boxes around, and here I'm ordering a stupid pair of needles that are a duplicate size to ones I own, but I just don't want to use. The circular needles are extremely nice and easy to work with and it is a pleasure to knit the socks. I still use the dpns as a stitch holder while I knit the heel. Today I'm connecting the insole and knitting along the foot. It's easy and enjoyable work especially after already completing the first sock.

I eat a prepackaged ube cake while I drink my tea and appreciate the nice pairing of flavors.

I feel bad about not getting more of my actual work done. However, I can't bring myself to concentrate on anything related to work. I keep moving my mouse around every 10 or so minutes so it looks like I'm active.

An old D&D friend of mine named Sam posts on FB about how he is proud of his company for continuing to let people work from home despite Ohio loosening some of the Stay at Home restrictions. I reply "We were told to expect to work from home until at least August. I'm grateful since it's one less thing to think about." Sam and I go back a forth a bit more, expressing gratitude and an interest in meeting up again once its safe. It's the first I've interacted with him in about 5 years and it makes me glad to hear from him.

I start lunch early because I don't have anything better to do. For lunch I make myself and CY a sandwich. We have some really good Italian bread we got from the grocery store that we can make into a decent replica of a Philadelphia style hoagie. I already chopped up the veggies so I can just take them out of the fridge and start layering them on. CY likes his sandwich with mayo and turkey. I don't like handling either of those things, but it's easy enough. I make his first then make a veggie version for myself. We use the new hoagie oil which isn't as bad as I had originally feared, but it isn't as good as the name brand one we had before. Pity they were out of it at the store when we went.

My 2019 tax refund from Ohio lands into my investment account. I plan to use it to invest in assorted stocks I feel will bounce back once the economy recovers.

After lunch I watch a few more youtube videos while I knit. One is a career review of the one-hit wonder band 'Living in a Box' and another is a recording of 'the world's worst singer' Florence Foster Jenkins. I had found an article that talked about people who had a medical condition which made them unable to percieve how poorly they performed a skill. In her case, she was a renowned as a very poor singer who believed she was very good and people would come to watch her ironically. I try to watch a congressional hearing where they discuss the health crisis with Dr. Fauci, but it's too depressing so I stop.

My anxiety related to work continues to grow. I figure that I'm not able to bring myself to do any investigation on my own, but I'm still able to ask people questions. I reach out through Skype to a colleague who I believe had worked with this business group before. I am surprised by how helpful she is and how quickly she is to respond. We get on a call and she shows me some reporting she did that is similar and directs me towards a table she thinks would have the values I'm looking for. She recommends another colleague to talk to and I schedule a meeting with him for the next day since he was busying for the rest of today. I feel instantly better. My anxiety about my work plummets and I find the energy and motivation to start investigating another task I've been given. I quickly find 1) the task was way easier than I initially estimated and 2) the data I want isn't available where I thought it would be. I even find out a new way to pull code out of Tableau and I excitedly share my discovery with another colleague. Around this time it's getting close to 4pm, my usual time to stop working and just become available for questions, should anyone need to reach out to me. I feel better about myself and allow myself to take more pleasure in my activities.

I start to prepare for the online D&D game I host each week, Tuesdays at 7:30pm. One of my favorite things about quarantine is that it's given me the time and ability to play again. I've missed having a regular D&D game badly. We had a very good game the previous week and I'm excited to make new material for this new game. I decide to include a villain who is a Banksia Man, one of the anatognists from the Australian fairy-tale Snugglepot and Cuddlepie. CY had helped me over the weekend come up with a cool backstory for him. I take notes and save some pictures so I can display them to my players through screen share.

A group of our friends are doing a Plank Challenge while we try to stay in shape while in quarantine. Colette set up a FB group with a list of exercises to do for 13 days. Each day, you do your assigned exercise then you post to the group to indicate you completed your day's tasks. CY and I made a point to work out for a bit each day after work and were already doing a fair amount of planks so the challenge as it was written was too easy for us. We tend to double the amount of time for each exercise or we double up the reps. My tasks for today are 30 seconds each of planks, rocking planks, hip dips, and up downs. I do all the exercises straight through twice with a short break in between sets then post to FB in the group.

After doing planks, CY and I go out to a nearby park to walk for a bit. We go for about 2.5 miles. It's a nice day, nearly 60 degrees. I am happy to see wild flowers starting to sprout up and the leaves coming back to the trees. Most people in the park are polite and keep their distance. It's rare to see people wearing masks while they are walking or running, so it almost feels normal.

We make it back with enough time for me to start getting my notes ready for game. CY offers to make me food and asks what I'd like to eat. We had just gone to Trader Joe's the weekend before and gotten a truly ridiculous amount of frozen food. He insists I pick something from the freezer to eat. In the end we decide he'll cut up the jackfruit crab cakes and make them into 'seafood tacos'. He even makes some sriracha ranch to go with it. The crab cake is surprisingly greasy, but it's very tasty and filling. Not sure I'd get it again though.

I go into the gaming group call and we quickly realize that only Gene and Aaron are going to be able to join game. We don't think it will be enough to continue the campaign I prepared for so I offer to do a one-shot just for them. I show them a cute rpg I found awhile ago called 'Fuck! It's Dracula' and we give it a shot. We have fun but I feel a bit unprepared since I have to ab lib most of the plot and come up with secret plans on the fly so they can be betrayed by their NPCs. The game is much shorter than I initially anticipated and we finish up around 9:30pm, much earlier than normal. I don't feel like Aaron and Gene enjoyed this game as much as they would have enjoyed the larger campaign I made, but at least we got to play together for a bit. I appreciate the social contact at the very least.

We dismiss ourselves from game and I join CY on the couch. He is watching some cooking tutorial videos, trying to teach himself how to smoke brisket properly. I go back and forth between different apps on my phone, not really paying attention to the TV. I try to read for a bit, but we eventually settle down to sleep before I get very far. I feel good about how the day went and I'm proud of myself for getting work done on the sock and researching my projects. I feel better about my life than I did when I first woke up this morning.

Fact and Fiction in Trading Places

Note:  This is the first of what I hope are many postings about movies that are based on the financial world.  As a long time industry professional I’ve noticed there are always things in movies about the financial world that get things right and others that are pure fiction. The idea here is to separate the two, but also spark civilized discussion about how the industry I love is depicted in movies.

Overview

Trading Places debuted in 1983 and is a story about a homeless con man and director of a commodity brokerage firm having their circumstances changed based on a social experiment conducted by the owners of a commodity brokerage firm.  They take Eddie Murphy’s character (con man) and put him in charge of their firm while ruining Dan Aykroyd’s (managing director) life to see if success is based on breeding (their words) or circumstances.

Pork Bellies

Yes, Pork Bellies are a real thing.  I was actually in Los Angeles around Christmas time a few years ago.  Andy Milder (Weeds, Austin & Ally) and a young guy were sitting at table next to me at dinner.  The young guy with Milder was actually ripping on this movie and one statement was, “it’s bullshit, they don’t really trade things like pork bellies or orange juice”.  It was all I could do not to lean over and get into the conversation, in fact overhearing that conversation was a catalyst behind staring this blog.  Both did trade at that time, however Pork Bellies were delisted by the Chicago Mercantile Exchange (CME) in 2011 due to lack of interest. Orange Juice Futures continue to trade at the IntercontinentalExchange (ICE), but at the time of the movie traded at the New York Board of Trade which was physically attached to the World Trade Center buildings.

So, early in the movie starts with a focus on the Pork Bellies market.   The quote, “Pork Bellies, I knew it” from Louis Winthorpe (Dan Aykroyd) has been repeated millions of times by traders around the world. However, the movie takes a turn, out of nowhere, to focus on the Orange Juice market.  The long term rumor in Chicago is that the CME changed their mind about allowing access to their floor for trading, possibly after seeing the nature of the movie script, so something that traded at a different exchange was substituted for Pork Bellies.   Maybe if CME had allowed access to the Pork Bellies pit that market would still be trading today.

Crop Reports

The price of anything is based on supply and demand.  In the case of agricultural crops, the supply side is based on growing season.  The US Department of Agricultural Statistics Service Florida Field Office periodically releases an update on the progress of the growing seasons for oranges.  Info on this report can be found at  USDA's National Agricultural Statistics Service Florida Field Office Citrus Production Forecast.  This is the report that moves the market in the climactic scene at the end of the movie.

The Bet

Randolph (Ralph Bellamy) and Mortimer Duke (Don Ameche) run a commodity brokerage firm and they make a bet on whether success is based on breeding (again, their words) or circumstances. Lots has been written on the inspiration for the actual bet.  Around the same time as the movie two well known traders in Chicago, Richard Dennis and Bill Eckhardt, conducted an experiment to see if trading could be taught.  They hired individuals through a Wall Street Journal ad and trained them to be traders. Dennis felt anyone could be taught to successfully trader while Eckhardt felt successful traders have a special knack for trading that can’t be taught.  Michael Covel does a wonderful job covering this in his book The Complete Turtle Trader also the rules they taught the traders can be found here Original Turtles Fighting Scams, Frauds, and Charlatans.

 Some Perspective on Numbers  

Since the movie was made in 1983, some of the numbers don’t sound all that impressive.  To give some perspective I’ve adjusted numbers to 2018 dollars based on inflation.  Early on the Dukes make about $347,000 extra by being patient on a Pork Bellies trade which is about $878,000 in 2018 dollars.   Later, the Dukes give Billy Ray Valentine (Eddie Murphy) a salary of $80,000 a year, that’s about $200,000 in 2018 after being adjusted for inflation.   Ophelia note she’s got $42,000 in T-Bills earning interest, today’s interest rates are very low, but in 1983 3-month T-Bill rates were in the 8% to 9% range. Finally at the end of the movie the $394 million margin call the Dukes are expected to pay would be about $985 million in 2018.    

Behavioral Finance

At one point in the movie Pork Bellies contract prices are dropping and the Dukes decide to try to buy on the lower pricing.  Billy Ray intervenes with a discussion of how traders are panicking.  He states that traders are losing money and won’t be able to buy the GI Joe with a Kung Fu Grip for their kid for Christmas along with another illustration of why they are panicking.  There’s a lot of truth to what he’s saying about the behavior of traders and anyone that was on a trading floor back in the day can attest to this. His insights were cutting edge at the time as behavioral finance had not really caught on in the mainstream as it has today.

 Frank Oz

Not financial, but something I like to share.  The police officer that interrogates Winthrop and plants drugs on him is played by Frank Oz who is the voice of many of the muppets including Miss Piggy.  Since the movie was originally going to focus on the Pork Bellies market I find a little irony in this.  

Trading Floor

This is where those that use to be on a trading floor pay particular attention.  In 1983 trading was still an open outcry endeavor so the floor was packed with people in various trading pits.   The movie does a good job of capturing the electricity of the trading floor when Winthorp and Valentine first walk on the floor.  The scenes before their pit scene are from real trading activity.  Also, the variety of physical activity based on the stress of being a floor trader is shown, but I believe downplayed for sensitive viewers when they are in the bathroom before the trading day.

Several movies that depict floor trading have had individuals just show up and trade.  There’s an approval process to become a member of an exchange and the process takes some time.  It is doubtful they could get trading access in the short period of time covered in the movie.  Also, the legal trouble and financial status of both would probably exclude them from actually ever being able to trade on an exchange floor. 

The trader for the Dukes is doing a good job replicating the hand signals despite being an actor (Richard Hunt – who is also the voice of several of the muppets).  Also, when a floor trader notices the Dukes watching the price action their response is pretty accurate as well.  Back in floor trading days successful traders activity would be noted by other traders.  Also, if a well know industry figure is lurking around it would be noticed.

The falsified crop report given to the Dukes indicates that weather is having a negative impact on the growing season.  Therefore they have instructed their trader to buy as less supply of oranges will drive the price higher.  The actual report is that weather hasn’t impacted the crop and the result is a quick drop in prices.  This is why our heroes are selling, but also why they wait to sell as the Duke’s broker and presence pushes the price up.

When the report is delivered in real life it would be a headline from a press release.  The scene with the Secretary of Agriculture on TV is for dramatic effect.  When different government agencies release statistics it is normally done through a press release which appears on the news feed on various quote services.

Trading Places does a pretty good job depicting the reality of how the markets function, especially the commodity markets.  In the early 1980’s floor trading dominated the commodity markets and the movie’s depiction of the floor is spot on.  

April Activities 2021

The major news of the month? I can’t believe I get to be fully vaccinated. It’s hard to describe how incredible it feels but I’m so ready to really start this next phase and I can’t wait for everyone I love to feel this feeling soon. Here’s what went down last month.

Here are my favourite tweets from last month. Also, I’ve decided to compile the best tweets list every two weeks rather than only once a month mostly because I love re-reading them and want that sort of joy in my life twice a month, not just once.

I did Nathan’s podcast and we talked about Rogers, sex robots & god only knows what else.

Two new nail polishes that I bought and love: English Lavender by butter and Cold Brew Crew by essie. Beautiful colours.

I’ve made this lamb ragu from Alison Roman twice so far, it’s so luxurious but somehow easy to make. I’ve put it on tagliatelle as well as zucchini noodles and both have been wonderful. Small tip: it does get better after it sits in the fridge for a bit, for some reason. (Also, the recipe doesn’t call for it, but I added basil at the end. I tend to add basil anytime something calls for parsley because it’s just so much more flavourful and fun.)

Above Photo: Alison Roman’s lamb ragu

I want to buy new underwear and I’m looking for any suggestions that aren’t Victoria’s Secret, Aerie or The Gap. I might just bite the bullet and try the ones from Blush (love love love the models they use).

I tried the strawberry short cake soft serve from Milk Bar and it was heavenly. The soft serve is even better than the strawberry cake (although the cookie crumbles within the cake always make my knees weak). In fact, I’ve yet to try a Milk Bar soft serve that I didn’t love (their vegan apple pie soft serve was out of this world), should I have been buying their pints this whole time? Yes.

I gave a chance to Ouai’s Air Dry Foam and it didn’t impress me or anyone else for that matter, so I guess I’ll just stick with the Wave Spray instead.

The rain boots that I bought a few years ago from Winners have disintegrated and I’m in search of new ones, but please don’t recommend Hunter ones. I hate Hunter. Open to any other suggestions!

Influenced by a TikTok video, I bought Falscara and holy shit. I know I promise this a lot, but I’m going to do a video on it so you can see how good a product it is. So many videos are coming, I vow.

There milk chocolate coconut almonds from CVS are UNHOLY.

I tried a sample of Glamglow’s Glowstarter moisturizer and was pleasantly surprised at how it really does give you a pleasant glow. What’s that about.

It’s uncivil how expensive body suit/swimwear hangers are. Who is this benefiting? I just want to hang my delicate bodysuits and carry on with my day.

Trader Joe’s has started selling their own vodka and I’m hoping they’ll start to sell it in New York soon. Seems weird that they don’t already.

I tried a small sample of Charlotte Tilbury’s Magic Elixir and discovered that the true magic behind the elixir is how she got anyone to believe that it does anything at all. Makeup products truly enrage me at times.

Nathan and I went to a movie theatre and it was everything I wanted it to be and more. We saw Godzilla vs. Kong and I found myself beaming through every inane scene. Perfect movie to see after a year of no theatres. Would I ever watch it again? Good lord no.

I bought a lotion bar from Gift Box on Broadway in Astoria and I love it. I think I’d use it more if it were slightly smaller and more manageable, but I love it nonetheless.

I tried Rao’s spaghetti and it was incredible, so now I’m forced to seek out their other types of pasta. Such a quality pasta.

I ate at The Pineapple Club and the basil fried rice and frozen pina coladas were both outrageously good.

I bought this bag from Zara and I’m honestly nervous to even wear it out for some weird reason. Like, am I the person who would have a bag like this? Do I want to be that person? Am I feeling this way because of having nowhere to go for so long? Have I always been this fearful? Some of these questions I shouldn’t answer, I realize.

Just bought these shoes in tan and I think I have my life all figured out now. Now if I can just leave the house wearing said shoes and holding said bag.

Speaking of shoes, I truly can’t decide if I love or loathe these slippers.

Last shoe thing: head over HEELS (not sorry) in love with these feet hugging sandals. Should’ve bought four more pairs.

I made these chocolate banana muffins and they were great but the real standout is the recipe at the bottom for the salted honey butter. Christ, you should make that butter.

I perused Molly Baz’s new cookbook and it’s a big one. Some standout recipes: The Big Italian salad, a dilly horseradish cream sauce for shrimp, and of course her caesar salad recipe.

I never thought I’d be the type of person to buy fake plants, but this one is so lifelike and pretty that I had to get it. Plus it’s perfect for the top of a bookshelf.

Above Photo: Fake plant from Target

It’s ramp season and I couldn’t be happier about it, you’ll hear more about my ramp creations next month.

I watched This is a Robbery on Netflix and don’t waste your time. Yes, it’s an interesting story, but save yourself a few hours and go read this instead.

I’m watching The Nanny and loving it. I’ve only ever watched a few episodes growing up, and I thought I would hate it because of how much everyone makes fun of Fran’s voice but her voice is fine! It’s wild that anyone ever said it was annoying. Also, the theme song is catchy as hell.

I rewatched Speed and it’s, of course, still great. What can’t Keanu do.

I watched the 90s movie The Crush and it’s really weird that movies like that would never have a chance being made today.

I’m all caught up on Riverdale now and… it’s hard to remember when it was really good. Maybe it was all Skeet Ulrich? Was that the main draw in my mind? I can see that making sense. In any case, it’s taken a turn.

There’s something so inviting about having good washroom rugs, I just got these soft-as-hell Threshold ones and I’ll never buy another brand again.

I visited the midtown Ideal Cheese Shop (been meaning to forever) and it’s such a great spot for NYC delicacies as well as, obviously, cheese. They had pre-packed bacon from Peter Luger and salmon from Daniel Boulud.

Things are already changing fast with new restrictions loosing in NYC, but did you know you can rent out a bar for an hour?

I tried the breakfast Beyond Meat sausage patties and surprise, surprise, they’re great. There’s nothing this company can do wrong. I’m becoming suspicious.

I got drinks and some small bites at Bar Dalia in Astoria and what a sweet little place! Would go again.

I finally got my hands on the kitchen-scented mini candles from Trader Joe’s (the scents are lemongrass, tomato leaf, fresh mint). They fill me with joy, unfortunately. I also got their grapefruit scented body butter, which goes on very smoothly but I’ve noticed it has a scent that’s slightly off-putting over time. I will not dwell on that fact further.

Had no idea that Banza made a pizza crust but I tried it and it’s wonderful.

I love seeing what promotional giveaways are planned for the upcoming baseball season but since we’re technically still in a pandemic, the Mets are only releasing what the promotions are each month (makes sense). So I’ve bookmarked the page to go look at on the first of each month.

I don’t eat a ton of fast food, but I’m sorry, some of these are genius ideas.

I’ll regret it if I don’t buy a box of these, right?

I know that it’s common to read an article about something and feel “that’s me!” but this one really resonates with me: “There’s a Name for the Blah You’re Feeling: It’s Called Languishing.”

The best brand at Target: A New Day.

Love and fully agree with all of this woman’s questions about things that don’t make sense.

I was walking past a Home Depot in Queens and the smell of the sandwiches at Rocco’s was heavenly. I had just eaten, otherwise I would have leaped into line. Must remember to get a Philly cheese steak here next time. The Yelp reviews are calling me.

I bought this earring organizer from The Container Store and it’s perfect. Fully recommend. I also finally got a purse organizer and some shoe boxes that make me feel like I might be a successful woman in her prime.

Above Photo: Earring Stand from The Container Store

Above Photo: Left: purse storage holder, Right: shoe storage boxes, Not Shown: me, opening & closing my closet door ten times to bask in my new found organizational skills

I had no idea Zara had a home section. I wish I didn’t have this knowledge, but now that I do, you must too. Literally ALL of these glasses are gorgeous. Tempted to go smash each glass in my kitchen cupboard right this instant.

This Artist Faked Being a Billionaire to Photograph New York City's Best Views - such a great idea, such great photos. How was it not me who came up with this?

Some more spring recipes I’m dying to make:

Ramp & Ricotta Tart

Grilled Asparagus Caesar Salad

Lemon Poppy Seed Cake

Scallop Risotto with Lemon & Sweet Peas

Grilled Caprese Skewers with Halloumi and Sourdough

Some things that I’m looking forward to this month: the new/final season of Shrill comes out this week (!), I might be going to a Mets game (!!), dying to eat at Under The Volcano, really want to visit the new Dippin' Dots store, I’ve been craving a good club sandwich for months so I might try to get brunch at Mark’s Off Madison, I know it might be early but I can’t wait to go tan on Governors Island soon, and at some point I’d really love to take one of these pasta cooking classes.

Above Photo: The club sandwich at Mark’s Off Madison, photo courtesy of Front of House

If you’ve got any interest in reading last month’s roundup, you can see what went down in March over here.

VinePair Podcast: Boozy Lemonade Makes a Stand

It might have taken the entire industry by surprise, but lemonade has proven to be the breakthrough flavor in hard seltzer this year. Spurred by Truly’s success, brands from Bud Light to Corona to even Mike’s Hard Lemonade are jumping on board, giving credence to the idea that lemonade will be a dominant flavor in the drinks world in 2021.

On this week’s episode of the “VinePair Podcast,” Zach Geballe and Adam Teeter talk about why lemonade has struck such a chord with the drinking public, whether the trend will cross over from hard seltzer into cocktails, wine, and beer — and if so, what drinks and styles will be best positioned to capitalize on that demand.

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Or check out the conversation here

Adam: From Brooklyn, New York I’m Adam Teeter.

Zach: And in Seattle, Washington, I’m Zach Geballe.

A: And this is the VinePair podcast. Zach man, Super Bowl. You know what’d you drink?

Z: Oh, my God. Well, I’m going to be completely honest and say I watched exactly zero seconds of the Super Bowl.

A: Oh, wow.

Z: Yeah. I will say my approach to the Super Bowl lately when I haven’t had much of a rooting interest is I kind of monitor the score. And then if it seems like it’s a close game, I’ll tune in later. That obviously was not the case this year. So I definitely just was like, “Well, I’m going to do something else with my time.” And I don’t know if I drank during the Super Bowl, but I will tell you the things that I drank lately, and I know you will appreciate this in particular, Adam. So I taught a class on Greek wine this past week.

A: I saw that, yeah.

Z: Yeah. And I know it’s always been a favorite, and I’ve had it before, but I had the Xinomavro from Alpha Estate and I know, not this specific one, but one of their other bottlings was the No. 1 wine of the year for 2020 from VinePair. So definitely a heavy recommendation for me as well. Just love the variety. Love the style and yeah, it was delicious. And we got some Greek takeout. It was delightful. I was a very happy man. How about you?

A: So first of all, I need some more Xinomavro in my life. So if you are a Xinomavro producer and you listen to a podcast or you have access to Xinomavro, I’m happy to send you my and Zach’s addresses. Just email us at [email protected]. So it’s really funny, actually, that you mentioned Xinomavro, because I also had it this weekend, but I had it earlier. I had it on Saturday. And then did the Super Bowl on Sunday. So on Saturday, I think I’ve talked about her before, but Lena is like my wife and my best friend, and she’s Greek and born in Athens. Now, obviously, she lives in the United States. And she took us to this amazing Greek market a few weeks ago in Astoria where like, again, it is amazing, man. Like if you don’t shop at ethnic markets, you got to go. Because first of all, the prices are so much better. It’s funny, they had these amazing phyllo spanakopita and phyllo pastries and things like that, all frozen that you can bake really easily, all made in Greece. And I was talking about how you could buy this at Trader Joe’s, too. But even at Trader Joe’s, where we think of as being super affordable, it’s like $5.99. And this is like $3.99. I got an amazing huge 5-liter jug of amazing olive oil.

Z: Cool.

A: I got all this cool stuff. So I’d gotten some feta and halloumi and things like that. And so I made my version of I don’t know, I mean it’s bad, but I tried, I tried to make souvlaki. And then had Xinomavro, which was delicious. And I had the Alpha Estate one because I just happened to have the second bottle. We sort of all fought over it.

Z: Somehow it ended up in your pile.

A: Yeah. Well, when we did the big tasting and we had the second bottles left over, we all sort of drew straws and I just pulled the like, “I’m taking this one.” But that was really delicious. And then this week for Sunday, I went to the grocery store and I think I saw Industrial Arts Wrench, which was one of our top beers a few years ago. And it’s been a while since I had it. And so I bought a 4-pack of that and I had two of those during the game because it feels like, I don’t know, for me it feels like what you’re supposed to drink is beer.

Z: Yeah.

A: I know that wine is on the upswing and they’re showing every single year, wine eats more and more into beer’s stranglehold of consumption during the Super Bowl. But I forgot how good the beer was. And it’s funny, that that happens so often in beer where just because there’s so much, and as we talked about before, it’s become easier and easier to get these beers. As you know, these breweries are realizing that they have excess capacity and they need to dump on the markets. I just don’t seem to have a go-to anymore. I used to. Like Wrench used to be like, if I saw Wrench, that’s what I grabbed. I think it was like three or four years ago. Now it’s like, “Oh, well, I also see these other amazing breweries and I’m going to get these, too.” So it was cool to have it again and remember that it is so delicious. So that was a lot of fun. But now, you know, taking a dry week.

Z: I have a tangential question for you on this that just occurred to me. So I’m wondering, one thing that I think we’ve seen when we’ve talked about beer and hard seltzer and their overlap and point of comparison is that they are to some extent definitely pulling from some of the same audience. But one thing that we’ve talked about when we’ve talked about seltzer before is a big selling point for seltzer is the mixed case, right? Like people shop for those more than they shop for anything else. I mean, I remember being struck when we were doing some “Next Round” interviews earlier that mixed cases were the things that were flying off store shelves more than anything else. But with the exception of some of the big breweries, like Sam Adams does this, and I’m sure some others where you can buy a mixed case of their beers. I remain surprised that some of these smaller producers are not putting their 4-packs or 6-packs together with two-two-two, or four different beers. Because I think that, like, what you’re talking about had been a thing in craft beer that people had their favorite beer and they just bought that. But I think for so many people and for me especially, a thing that we’re missing in this period of time and making it more difficult to go to taprooms and try things, is that exploration and discovery. And it surprises me that we don’t see more of those mixed packs out in the wild. Maybe I’m wrong. Maybe they’re out there and I’m just not seeing them. But it’s something I keep an eye out for when I go to the grocery store or even when I go to the breweries near me. Sometimes if I say, “Hey, can I get four different 16- ounce cans?” They’ll do it. But it’s not always the case that they want to sell stuff individually. And I’m just kind of not sure why.

A: Yeah, actually what you’re saying, I hadn’t thought about but I’m like, “Yeah. Why don’t they do this?” And I get that the 4-pack has become “the thing,” the trendy thing. And I like to have at least two of each beer. Just so if I like it, I would like to return to it and be like, “Oh, I really like this, I’ll have one more.” But I feel like a lot of these breweries should go to that. If they want to keep their big cans, that’s fine. But go to a 6-pack and do two-two-two. And let me have three different variations of your crazy hazies. Or three different variations of your pilsners or whatever. I think that that would make a lot of sense because you’re right. Like that’s why the mixed case does so well with seltzer. I mean, look, everyone says they have a favorite flavor and they drink that first, and then they’re like, “Oh, I got like so many black cherries that just sit in the back of the refrigerator.” But for the most part, the other reason that it’s successful is because the hard seltzer producers know that people are usually consuming these with other friends. And so, you have flavor options for people. As opposed to being like, “I like grapefruit, so I’m going to buy a case of grapefruit.” And then my friends come over and they’re like, “Oh, I’m really a cherry drinker or black cherry or whatever or blackberry.” And then all of a sudden you’re like, “Oh, sorry, dude, I don’t have that flavor for you.” So yeah, I wonder if that would be smart. Because early days craft beer you saw that a lot. The big craft breweries would do these mixed cases. I remember always getting the SweetWater one that had like three of their classic IPA, three of their 420, three of their Sweetwater Blue, and I think three of their Brown Ale. Right? And it was great because you got to know the brewery across the board, whereas now I feel like people get stuck on one style. But I also think a lot of breweries are mostly doing one style. At least a lot of them are, right? They’ll try to do other things, but they’re really known for one thing, where I don’t know anyone that knows Other Half for anything other than hazy IPAs. I know they do other beers, but like that’s what they’re known for. That’s definitely very different than what it used to be in the early days of craft beer. for sure.

Z: True. Where yeah, you just had fewer breweries. So they kind of all felt compelled to make a range of beers. And if you wanted a craft beer or a craft pilsner, you were likely to get it from the same brewery.

A: Exactly.

Z: As opposed to now where you might have a favorite craft pilsner brewery, and a favorite craft IPA brewery, and a favorite craft dark beer brewery, whatever. Right? Like there’s all these different things. So I think it would be an interesting experiment. There’s probably reasons that are good. And if you listeners have them, send us an email ([email protected]). Let us know why your brewery still likes to put six or four cans together of the same beer and sell them that way.

A: Yeah. So Zach, man, we’re having a fun conversation today and that conversation is about lemon.

Z: Yeah, we’re going to take lemons and make a podcast out of them.

A: So if you read the site, you know that we’ve talked a lot about lemon in the recent past. And lemon is a flavor and lemon is the big flavor that we’re going to see this summer and probably well past the summer and basically primarily in seltzer. But I wanted to have this conversation because I’m curious to think through where this could take us just in other drinks, like how does lemon potentially translate into wine?

How does lemon translate into other cocktails? In the search aisles of beer. So to lay our conversation for us, a year ago or so, Truly hard seltzer decided to come out with a Truly hard lemonade seltzer. So still seltzer. I think that a lot of people like in the drinks business were like, “Haha, that’s so ridiculous. Like Truly is going full-circle, like from being the head seltzer to basically ripping off Mike’s hard lemonade, which makes White Claw.” You know, like insider people thought it was really funny, like what is Truly doing? And they debuted this seltzer lemonade, and it just exploded from the get. And it quickly became one of their top-selling SKUs. I think now it may be more successful than even their traditional Truly variety pack. Lots of flavors of lemonade. Right? But always with lemon as the core background. And now you see everyone else fast following. Bud Light is coming out with lemonade-flavored seltzers. White Claw is doing its own. Mike’s Hard Lemonade is about to come out with a Mike’s Hard Lemonade Seltzer. Corona, everyone is following lemonade. And so we started looking at this and realizing, maybe there is something here. When you look at all the data, it’s very clear. Out of citrus flavors, lemon, among Americans, is the most popular flavor. Right? And the seltzers have keyed in on this. Now, maybe seltzer and lemonade is the perfect pairing. But I think it’s interesting, and I think it’s specifically lemonade, right? That this sort of “lemonade flavor” has come out of nowhere and is all of a sudden — or maybe didn’t come out of nowhere, but all of a sudden going to be pretty ubiquitous. So, look, I mean, we’re going to start to see lemonade hard seltzers all over the place. We already are seeing them. Lemonade is becoming this thing that has gone from what we think that kids drink at their lemonade stand to now a flavor that adults are across the board embracing. And I’m curious, like, where we think this is coming from? And how we think this is going to impact the wider world of drinks.

Z: So as far as the question of where it’s coming from, I mean, allow me to do some very amateur psychology here.

A: Yes.

Z: I think one thing that we’ve talked about a lot since the start of the Covid pandemic is how much our emotions play into what we want to drink. And I think we talked a lot last year about how things like tropical ingredients, lime, that kind of stuff, was going to be really appealing to people because it was going to be this year where it was summer and it was nice out and yet people were not necessarily just trapped at home. I mean, they were able to be outside. But travel was not an option for most people. There was a lot of this desire and longing to travel virtually. I think what’s different about coming into 2021 from 2020 is that we are for one much further into the pandemic. And I think what people want, and maybe projecting forward what they’re going to want, are flavors and experiences that feel like a return to normal. And that’s not to say that by summer things will have returned to normal. But I think in some ways the longing for lemonade is really about, as you said, the childhood innocence of the lemonade stand, the flavor that goes with it, the comfort and the familiarity. And the fact that lemon, even more than lime or orange or grapefruit is such a versatile, and at times can be almost the ideal background singer, but it can also take the lead. And I think that that to me makes a ton of sense as people are going to be still in this weird sort of not-totally-back-to-normal state. But people are going to want that comfort and familiarity that I think lemon provides, that even something that we consume lots of as Americans like orange or lime just can’t.

A: Yeah, actually, I think that’s really insightful.

Z: Thank you.

A: I feel like yeah, there is this desire to sort of return to childhood. And it’s interesting, what is it about lemon that is so much more desirable to consumers than lime, orange, etc.? So when we started investigating this, we started looking at trends, data, and things like that. And when you look at just the flavor as a whole and people’s interest in it, the search volume for lemon and lemon-flavored things is off the charts compared to grapefruit, orange, lime. And that was surprising to me, especially because lime is the key ingredient in the most popular cocktail in America: the Margarita. So I would have thought that lime and lemon would have kind of gone hand-in-hand and that maybe we were just having a lemon moment. But for years now, lemon has been — and lemonade, specifically — has been this thing that we’re really highly interested in. So it’s crazy to me that this didn’t happen sooner in seltzer, because I love sparkling water and lemon.

Z: Yeah.

A: So it’s very interesting that, yeah, this has now been this thing that Truly did and everyone thought they were crazy, and now everyone’s following. And so now I’m really curious, if this is what we’re going to start drinking a lot of, or a lot of people are going to start drinking. What are the easy sort of transition beverages from seltzer that’s lemon-flavored to X cocktail or X wine?

Z: Well, I think that the most obvious one for me as a start of a transition cocktail is the French 75. So to me, there you have a lot of the components that people love in a lemonade seltzer, i.e., lemon, sparkling. It’s got booze in it. It can be made a little bit sweet, but it’s going to feel like a fancier drink. It’s got sparkling wine in it instead of sparkling water, it’s got gin in it. So it’s got a little bit of an additional dimension in terms of flavor. But it is also a great cocktail in that, a little bit like a Mimosa, you can kind of go to whatever ratio you prefer. It’s a really flexible cocktail in terms of the ingredient proportions. You know, some cocktails, especially citrus-based cocktails, can kind of get out of whack if you’re not careful. And obviously, the French 75 can go wrong, but if you want to even make it with some sparkling water as well so it’s not quite as boozy, because obviously with gin and sparkling wine, it’s going to pack more punch than the equivalent volume of lemonade seltzer would. But that, to me, is just a no-brainer. I also wonder, and here’s a cocktail that I kind of love that, my God, I get s*** for saying I enjoy it. But, you know, what’s a really good cocktail when it’s well-made?

A: What?

Z: A motherf****** Lemon Drop. And like, because it does the exact same kinds of things, right? It’s got that beautiful tartness if you make it with fresh lemon juice, it’s got some sweetness to it. I personally don’t go for the sugared rim, but I get why people do. You know it’s vodka. So it’s a nice kind of clean cocktail. It’s just such a straightforward but delicious drink because fundamentally, and this is the point in some way, right? Like lemon plus a little bit alcohol or a lot of alcohol depending, plus a little sugar, plus water — whether sparkling or not — that is just an outright delicious flavor combo and doesn’t matter how dated that cocktail is. I still kind of like it.

A: Do you think that that’s a cocktail that’s kind of just hurt by its name?

Z: Probably.

A: Like I often wonder. I think the reason that people also love these lemonade seltzers and we’re not all running to Mike’s hard lemonade is Mike’s hard lemonade we kind of all remember as that really sickly sweet kind of almost like Country Time lemonade. You remember the Country Time mix?

Z: Yeah.

A: That like we liked as kids but like, we don’t want to drink something that sweet as an adult. But we still like the lemon flavor. And that’s why I wonder if the lemon drop kind of suffers from just thinking that it’s going to be that sweet lemon candy. As opposed to a squeeze of citrus in a glass of sparkling water, which I think is interesting. And I’ve wondered a lot about what those cocktails could be. I do wonder, too, if it’s just as you said, I wonder if — yes, I know it’s made with lime — but I wonder if you will see some version of a lemon Gimlet.

Z: Mm hmm. Yeah. I mean, I think to me the thing that’s interesting here is, one, you’re totally right that the name hurts the Lemon Drop. If it was just the lemon Martini, people would probably order it a lot more often. And I also think that that you’re right that maybe some of this could either spill over into or could be kind of co-opted. I mean, I don’t think there’s any reason you couldn’t make essentially a Gimlet with lemon juice. It would taste a little different, but still, I’m sure, be delicious. I also wonder, Adam, and I’m curious about your thoughts on this. You know, one of the other areas that I think about lemonade in cocktails is like the well, what I always called the John Daly, essentially an Arnold Palmer, so iced tea, lemonade, and then with booze. And that was a huge — we had a big craze in the restaurant industry a decade ago for that. Like that was a cocktail. There were sweet tea vodkas everywhere. And like that and lemonade was for a summer our best- selling cocktail. Which was great because it was super good for costs. It was not an expensive drink to make. But do you think that is also something that we’re going to see a lot of in this year?

A: You mean just like spiked lemonade?

Z: Well, but I mean that combination with iced tea.

A: I think yeah. So that’s the other thing that you’re starting to see now is that I think a bunch of people are putting out these hard seltzer teas. It’s funny, everything is seltzer. But also everything is like what it already was. But yeah, I mean, Twisted Tea that also Boston Beer Co. owns. I think you’ll see some sort of version of an Arnold Palmer for sure. I think that that’s, again, it’s sort of that savory, sweet, refreshing flavor that we love in the summer. But honestly, all times of year that we’re kind of just giving an adult version to.

Z: For sure.

A: Which then I wonder, so like for me, then where else do we go from here? Are there wines that for people who are enjoying these seltzers will be translatable? Like is a Pinot Grigio going to be something people look for? Because I feel like Pinot Grigio has a lot of that lemon component. Or is it like a Pinot Grigio Spritz, where you actually have Pinot Grigio mixed with sparkling water?

Z: Yeah, that’s an interesting question. I mean, I think that one area that we might see some of this translated into so when it comes to wine. I think it could be a good thing for something like Pinot Grigio, maybe. I think of Chablis, or a really kind of stainless-steel-fermented Chardonnay as being an area of wine where you do get a lot of citrus notes. I also wonder, a category that I think could do really well is sangria, like white sangrias, and maybe wine-based punches. That kind of thing feels like you can put beautiful lemon in the drink. It looks cool if we’re doing semi-back-to-normal outdoor gatherings. I feel like we’re going to see a big summer for things that feel festive. Right? Like we can actually see our families again safely, maybe because everyone is vaccinated, hopefully. And like, that’s the kind of thing to me, because it’s not just the accessibility of lemonade and lemon flavor that is going to drive so much of its popularity, although it’s also that. But it’s also like, it’s widely available and it does just sort of play with so many different flavors. I don’t know that I would say, like, here’s a wine that is really lemony. I mean, there are certainly some out there. I’ll continue to think about this. But definitely like things that incorporate wine and lemon, I think it will definitely be big.

A: That makes sense. That makes a lot of sense. Yeah. I just think, we all need to keep our eyes on lemon.

Z: Well my big question is, are we finally going to get past the issue people had with putting lemon wedges in their beer? Because my wife and I have had arguments about this. My wife has finally admitted that she was influenced by big beer’s advertising that you don’t put fruit in beer. I think fruit in a wheat beer is fantastic and is like the point of it. And I think we’re going to see some wheat beers, hefeweizen, etc. that desperately need that squeeze of lemon, or that lemon wheel or whatever in them. And I don’t know, maybe I’m on my own here. What do you think, Adam?

A: I think you will see some people. But again, I think it will only be, maybe the really light shandies.

Z: That’s another good one, yeah.

A: Yeah. I think the thing that we all need to also recognize about why lemon is taking off in the way that it is, is that these seltzers are all really light. So I’m not telling people to run out and make their own version of Mike’s Hard Lemonade. While that is still a successful brand, I think the reason we’re seeing success is because it is more of a lemon flavor that is similar to a bottle of Pellegrino with lemon in it. And maybe obviously a little sweetener, than something that tastes syrupy or heavy. And I do wonder if that is a problem for the beer and that some of those beers could still taste heavy to people. But I think you will see some of it, though. I mean, I think Narragansett has a really successful lemon shandy. And that potentially will do even better this summer. Again, there have been brands that have had these lemon flavors. So it’s been there. It’s just like you’re watching everyone with the seltzer craze rush in. In a way that you haven’t seen one flavor really dominate in a long time.

Z: And I wonder — my last thought on this, and I’m curious about your take, Adam — I look at this and I look at this especially in the kind of pivot to something like outright lemonade as opposed to like lemon flavor. Right? As like also this interesting potential evolution point in seltzer, where something we discussed when we did an episode about seltzer with Erica last year is, at some point the seltzer market is going to grow to a point where it starts to fracture or bifurcate or something, and some people are going to go in the direction of: What we really like about this beverage is it’s relatively light. It’s carbonated. It’s very easy to transport, and store, and all that, and consume. And maybe we’re not as deeply concerned about whether it’s 70 calories or 90 calories or 110 calories. And we care more about the flavors. And that might lead you to some of these lemonade flavors where, if it’s going to be a little bit sweet, it’s probably going to have a higher calorie count than one that isn’t. And obviously there’s still going to be a big part of the market that’s really interested in lowest calorie possible, all about the sort of, whatever, “clean drinking” something or other. And I see this as being an example where one path for this is to make a thing taste reasonably like lemonade, you’ve got to put some sugar in it. It’s kind of unavoidable. And do you see this as being a sign of this fracturing?

A: I do, actually, I do. Because it’s like it’s going to be one or the other. You know what I mean? I think you’re completely right here.

Z: Because I did an interview for “Next Round” with a couple of women who are putting out a tequila-based, sort of bottled sparkling cocktail with fruit juice in it. And like we didn’t talk about specific calorie counts. I know they’re kind of concerned with cleanliness generally or pure ingredients, things like that. But I think that’s a drink to me where you look at that and you go, the person buying that cares about how many calories are in their drink, but they’re not making their decision based solely on that. They’re obviously going to be influenced by presumably more intense flavor, or superior flavor or however you want to think about that. And I think that the race in hard seltzer for a while was how do we get to a really low calorie count? How do we splash that on the label? And that was the initial audience for that. But as it’s grown and grown and expanded to people who, maybe like me, are not deeply cautious or concerned about the exact calorie count — I mean, obviously not. If you look at what I tend to drink, then what matters is more the flavoring. Yeah, I don’t want it to be syrupy, but I might want my lemonade hard seltzer to taste like lemonade to some extent and not essence of lemon with some booze.

A: So I do think that there is going to be some of that, but the market’s going to be nowhere as big.

Z: Yeah.

A: I think what is driving this entire movement, and the lemon movement for the refreshment in general, is the calories. And I think there will be a niche for some of these other products. I think I know which one you’re talking about. And yes, there will be a health-halo niche. I guess that’s what we’re saying. Right? There’ll be other health-halo products people like, but those people will never see the kind of sales that these other products are seeing. Because also, and this is where it gets interesting, the people who are purchasing these products for calories, you’ve talked about this before, right? They’re not purchasing them to drink one. They’re purchasing to be able to drink six or seven on a Saturday afternoon and not have guilt because they only consumed 600 or 700 calories.

Z: That’s a good point.

A: Right? And so that’s the difference. And that’s what’s driving these mixed-case packs as you talked about the beginning of the show. Those big mixed-case packs get finished in one sitting.

Z: Yeah.

A: Now it’s a group of friends. It’s not one person, but they’re drinking through them, and they’re only consuming 250 to 300 calories.

Z: That’s a good point.

A: And I always forget what the calorie count for an IPA is, but it’s a lot more.

Z: It’s 200 to 300 calories usually for a 12-ounce.

A: Right. And they have three. So that’s what is happening here. And the people driving it, which I think is so interesting, is such a mix. It’s young college-age kids who this is what they’re drinking. We talked about having a conversation about this down the road. But this is what they’re drinking instead of light beer. It’s people who are really sort of focused on exercise, who want to be able to go drinking with their friends but don’t want to ruin the Peloton ride they took that morning. So they don’t want to sort of say, like, “I don’t want to regret it.” They don’t want to just fill in those calories. They want to have still burned more. It’s a lot, which is really interesting, of late-30s and 40s-aged individuals, men and women, right? So this is not a category that is being driven just by one gender, again for the same reason. As you get older, it becomes harder to burn calories. But you still want to be able to, you know, “40 is the new 30. 30 is the new 20.” You still want to be able to hang out like you used to. And so people are looking for these low-calorie options. And I think, again, that’s where you will achieve scale. Now, that’s not going to be important for everyone, right? Not every business wants to be a multi, multibillion dollar business. Some people are very happy being a multimillion dollar business. And some of these other interesting brands will be that. But they won’t be the ones that I think would ultimately then be something that like an ABI or a Constellation or whatever is looking for for acquisition. They’re looking for these mass brands that are just seeing incredible depletions. So, you know, who knows? But the whole lemon and low-calorie thing, man, it seems like it’s going to be everywhere this summer. So let’s get ready for it.

Z: Yeah, I’m going to start polishing up my Lemon Drop recipe, I guess.

A: Dude share it with me.

Z: I will. It’s very simple. It’s just tasty. That’s all.

A: Cool. All right, dude. Well, I will talk to you next week when we’re going to have a conversation about some TikTok drinks trends.

Z: Man, your favorite frickin’ gab topic to discuss. TikTok, I cannot escape it with you.

A: I know. I know. So I’ll see you right back here next week.

Z: Sounds great.

Thanks so much for listening to the VinePair Podcast. If you enjoy listening to us every week, please leave us a review or rating on iTunes, Spotify, or wherever it is that you get your podcasts. It really helps everyone else discover the show. Now for the credits. VinePair is produced by myself and Zach Geballe. It is also mixed and edited by him. Yeah, Zach, we know you do a lot. I’d also like to thank the entire VinePair team, including my co-founder, Josh, and our associate editor, Cat. Thanks so much for listening. See you next week.

Ed. note: This episode has been edited for length and clarity.

The article VinePair Podcast: Boozy Lemonade Makes a Stand‬ appeared first on VinePair.

Via https://vinepair.com/articles/boozy-lemonade-podcast/

source https://vinology1.weebly.com/blog/vinepair-podcast-boozy-lemonade-makes-a-stand

1036.

5k Survey LXXVI

3901. What is the most annoying tv ad? >> Implying that they aren’t all annoying? 3902. If you died, how would you hope others would remember you? >> I’m not concerned about that right now. I’m still on “are people even going to care?”, so. 3903. Name 2 questions that you will most likely never say 'no' to: >> This reminds me of how Sparrow and I have “body snatcher” questions -- like, questions you’d ask if you’re suspicious that the other person has been possessed or replaced by a lookalike impostor or whatever. And one of hers for me is “do you want Red Robin?” because I never say no to Red Robin, lmao. 3904. What is the softest part of your body? >> I don’t know, man. My organs??? 3905. What family do you want to see in place of the Osbournes when they finally stop doing their show? >> ---

3906. If you could pick 3 bands to go on tour together who would they be? >> I don’t care. We can’t go to concerts right now anyway. 3907. What is a main differance between western and eastern philospohy? >> Location. 3908. Would you be fooled by Joe/Josephine Millionaire? >> Who? 3909. Do you believe Michael Jackson does innoprpriate things at his Neverland Ranch? Like what? >> I don’t care. I don’t care I don’t care I don’t care. When he died the first thing I thought was, “oh, good, then I won’t have to hear about this shit anymore”. That’s how much I do not care. 3910. What do you think of gov. Ryan who cleared out Illinois' death row? >> This means nothing to me. 3911. Would you want a $500 gift certificate to: Kmart or Target? Target. Kmart doesn’t even exist in this area anymore. Macy's or Hot Topic? Macy’s. As much as I nostalgically love Hot Topic, let’s be real -- the clothing quality is shit, not to mention that they really don’t sell the same shit I used to love about them anymore. Border's Books or Spencer Gifts? oh, I miss Borders! :’( Victoria's Secret or Frederick's of Hollywood? I don’t wear lingerie, so I guess you’ll be giving that Frederick’s gift certificate to Sparrow. 3912. What do you think of this website: www.blackpeopleloveus.com/ >> Oh, that’s hilarious. I’m glad I actually went to see what it was, considering I’m usually lazy about that on surveys, lol. 3913. Man vs Elephant. A zookeeper was treating a constipated elephant. He gave her too much laxitive. Suddenly everything exploded out onto the zookeeper. He was knocked to the ground where he hit his head on a rock and got knocked out. There he suffocated under a pile of elephant dung. True story. Is it a funy story? If yes, what is funny about it? Why is it so taboo to laugh at death? >> I can see the humour in it -- I love ridiculous death stories -- but the concept is too gross for me to think about. And it’s taboo to laugh at death because people often feel like if you laugh at something you can’t also take it seriously when need be -- which isn’t true at all, in my experience. I laugh at death jokes and funny death stories without fail, but if someone told me someone they loved just died in [insert ridiculous way here] I’m not going to fucking laugh in their face about it. (People are welcome to laugh if I die in a ridiculous way, though. I’d probably do it on purpose just to add some levity to the situation.) 3914. What are your favorite five things from this list: alternate realities, animals, astronomy, birds, camus, cats, cheap trick, cocaine, cooking, costumes, dancing, elvis, gambling, greta garbo, james dean, jeff buckley, joy division, marilyn monroe, mixed drinks, moody blues, morrissey, mozart, my bloody valentine, orbital, pizza, playing flute, prince, radiohead, rummy 500, scrabble, table tennis, talk talk, van morrison, writing >> Alternate realities, astronomy, dancing, James Dean, Joy Division. Also mixed drinks. Preferably while listening to Joy Division and looking at the stars. 3915. Do you have to read lots to be able to write well? >> I think it helps. 3916. Vanilla ice. Everyone loved him, suddenly everyone hated him. What was the deal?? >> I’m sure there was a story, but I certainly don’t care enough to know it. 3917. If you could kick one person out of the grammies who would it be (Avril, Eminem, etc)? >> --- 3918. Studies have revealed that when sending out a resume a person has a 50% higher chance of getting a responce if their name is white sounding than if it is black sounding. What do you think about this? Why do companies respond this way? >> I don’t know what these “studies” are, whether they actually existed, or whether they were even reputable (or repeatable...), but in the case that that does happen, it wouldn’t surprise me. Like, racism is a real thing that has real repercussions, lmao. We been knew. 3919. Should Big Fat Greek Wedding really be a Big Fat Greek sitcom? >> I don’t know??? 3920. What are you addicted to? >> Nothing. 3921. What fascinates you? >> A lot of things. 3922. What is fascinating about you? >> I’m not sure. 3923. Personality wise, is anything the same for all human beings and if so, what? >> I don’t know, and I wouldn’t dare to speculate. 3924. What kind of a contest woud you have a shot at winning? >> I’m not sure. 3925. You see a dirty punk kid who had a giant cowboy hat on who is rolling his own cigarettes. Your impression? >> “hah, check out Mini Odin over here”, probably. 3926. What would you never want to have more than 2 of? >> Ears??? I don’t know, dude. 3927. Is there a movie you just could not finish watching? What and why? >> Yeah, there’s quite a few movies like that. Beyond the Black Rainbow was one. It was just too fucking esoteric for me. 3928. Is there anyone that you love and want to be around for no explainable reason? >> Well, I mean, there’s a reason... it’s because Can Calah is wonderful and makes me feel good to be around. 3929. Would you go to times square for new years? >> Fuck no. I used to live like a 15-minute walk from Times Square and I still wouldn’t go on NYE. That is literal pure hell and I really don’t know why people do that to themselves. Watching it on TV at home with people you like (or even just by yourself/with your dog) and some snacks and a bottle of champagne is the true ideal. 3930. Do you think that there are to many signs blocking up the scenery? >> Like... street signs??? Is this a reference to something 3931. Did video really kill the radio star? >> *shrug* 3932. What was your favorite atari game? >> I’ve never played Atari. 3933. what is your favorite neon color? >> Neon green. 3934. Do you get depressed eveytime it rains? If yes, why? >> No, although a rainy day may exacerbate an already gloomy mood (I am absolutely solar-powered). 3935. 'The more you admit that all your actions are robotic, the less robotic you are.' What does Tim leary mean by this? Do you agree or disagree and why? How much of your actions do you admit are robotic? >> I personally don’t know what the fuck he’s on about, but all those “LSD gurus” said some weird shit like that on a regular basis. It was part of their charm, I guess (and definitely fit in with all the counterculture stuff going on in that era). 3936. Are we not men? >> Well, I’m not. I’m a spider. 3937. Is it easy to be you? Would being someone else make it any easier? >> It is very much not easy to be me. Being me is often so exhausting and energy-consuming that I can’t do anything else some days. I don’t know what it is like to be anyone else, though, so I can’t comment on that. I’m doing my best with what I’ve got. 3938. Why are sex religion and politics such taboo subjects? >> Because people usually have very strong, deep-set beliefs and opinions about those things, which can lead to strife if everyone in the room is not in agreement. 3939. Is there really a differance between republicans and democrats? >> Yes. Otherwise the divide wouldn’t exist in the first place. I would allow that the differences are changeable (as the foundational policies of both parties have shifted over time), but they still exist either way. 3940. Imagine someone has a great personality, sense or humor, family and job. they also really really like you a lot. Would you consider dating them if they: were fat? limped? were a midget? had hiv? were paralized in one arm? had a glass eye? had only 6 months to live?

3941. What makes you experiance nostalgia? >> I mean, a lot of things. 3942. What do you remember about these historical figures: Woodrow Wilson? Hellen Keller? Christopher Columbus? 3943. Out of the above three figures, one is a huge racist, one is a socialist and one is a slave trader. Can you guess which is which? Racist: socialist: slave trader: 3944. Betcha they didn't tell you that in american history. Wilson, Keller and Columbus are painted as heros, impossibly good, ideal people. Why are so many things ommitted from and lied about in american history text books? >> *sigh* 3945. Do you drink super caffinated energy drinks? >> I don’t drink energy drinks, and I avoid caffeine levels higher than that which is in a cup of black tea. 3946. eminem or moby? >> Eminem. 3947. spongebob or the animanicas? >> I’ve never seen the Animaniacs, but I don’t much care for Spongebob, so I guess I’d watch Animaniacs if I had to choose. 3948. Why do people rush to grow up only to wish they were a child again? >> Social pressure, and then disillusionment. *shrug* My best guess. That’s not the experience I had/am having, so I can’t speak from experience. 3949. Why do people sacrifice their health to obtain money and then use the money to restore their health? >> Because capitalism is hell. 3950. Jetsons or Flintstones? >> I don’t have a preference. They kind of strike me as the same show just set in wildly opposite time periods, lol.

august 19.2020

I have always been used to living in a place no one has ever heard of. A small retirement town on the edge of a peninsula that is on the edge of a state that is on the edge of a continent.

If you're from the West Coast, the assumption is that you are from California. But I am not from California; I am from Washington. When I tell people I am from Washington, people assume I am talking about DC. When you say you are from Washington State, the assumption is that you live in Seattle. But I am not from Seattle; I am from Clallam County. When I say I am from Clallam County, people first think of Port Angeles. I don't live in Port Angeles: I am from a town called Sequim.

The only centrality I have ever been able to claim has been that I live in The United States of America, the center of the universe, the superpower of the globe. However, I may not be able to say even that for much longer, the glory days of American exceptionalism behind us, because I heard recently that "the 1800s was the century of Britain, the 1900s the century of America, and the 2000s will be the century of Asia." Global dynamics are changing. If there was any doubt whether or not that was the case before 2016, Donald Trump sealed the deal. We are now a laughingstock. Meanwhile, China and metropolises in Asian Pacific are infiltrating Africa with colonial imperialism. Even the dynamics of the US itself are changing: we will be a racial minority-majority country before we know it.

And to that I say: good riddance. Let the world change already. I am already at he fifth stage of grief: acceptance. Let climate change fuck shit up. Let the apocalypse come. Let the manufacturing jobs move to China. Let the protester riots burn cities to the ground. Let the coronavirus thin the herd. Bring it on.

You see, I am stuck in a town that is inhabited by a populace who still behave as if it is the 1950s. Conservatives who have always benefited from Americana are suddenly getting an ego check - and they are resisting it, hard.

In a way, I understand the marginalization of people dismiss "the flyover states" because nothing significant ever happens there.

My dad says Seattle is a nice place to visit but he wouldn't want to live there. When my best friend from growing up moved there after high school, that's exactly what he said about Sequim.

I wonder how much of my views are influenced by the people around me. I didn't know much about politics when I was in high school but all of my beliefs were from Mikaele. Now Trent and BreadTube led me down a communism phase. I've held beliefs that are not shared by feminists, antifeminists, or MRAs. I have never met anyone who thinks catcalling is a good thing.

There is an entire faction of disenfranchised young people who are facing the same problems as me and Trent; only they get radicalized in the other direction and turn to the alt-right. They diagnose the problems spot on, but their solutions are incredibly wrong by blaming those below them instead of those above. But I can't help thinking about what Pete Buttigeig said once when he compared Bernie to Trump: being othered can radicalize you to reject the "system" or "establishment" and look to populist leaders, and some people end up fascists or racists and some end up socialists or communists or anarchists. I am very obstinate about my politics, even though I have changed before (saying "it is not an opinion, it is just wrong"), but how do I know I am not wrong? Racism is decidedly bad, we know that for sure.

I watched part of the third night of the Democratic National Convention tonight. I didn't even know the convention was happening until it came on my parents' TV on the first night, and the first thing I heard about it was that John Kasich, a literal republican, was speaking at the DEMOCRATIC National Convention for no reason other than he hates Trump, and that Michelle Obama came out of the shadows to let lib peasants kiss her feet. I didn't hear anything about the convention. I looked forward to watching the debates with vigor, turned them into drinking games and date nights, but after all of the shit that went down, the DNC does not come up in the circles I am in. "DNC" is a dirty term.

Billie Eillish was there tonight to be the token hip young person to convince all the young cynical leftists to vote for Sleepy Joe. Barrack Obama gave a speech that seemed to stop time in my world. Like most politicians, I've heard a lot about him, but I've seldom watched him a speech from beginning to end. Then Kamala Harris gave her acceptance speech to be the Vice Presidential Nominee, and it wasn't as inspirational, maybe because I've already seen her speak at the debates, maybe because Obama is this nostalgic figure that I remember from my childhood. I thought about how she pooped on Joe Biden during that one debate by calling him out for supporting racist legislation, and how she threw black people in jail for nonviolent drug offences yet bragged on that one podcast about smoking weed and listening to music that hadn't come out yet. And now they are both pretending to be BFFs while talking about dismantling systemic racism, and it makes me wonder if all politics is pandery bullshit and lies like this. Obama says no.

I think I have made up my mind: I will vote for Biden/Harris, but I won't ever let my mom know. Her activism begins and ends with convincing me to vote for her milquetoast moderate boomer, and it is my job to challenge her to think about the greater world. At the end of the day, we live in Washington, and our votes ultimately don't matter.

I watched a YouTube video yesterday about the unique marketing of Trader Joe's, and all of the memories came back. They explained that you might not be able to get all your staples there but you will find special things that you can't find anywhere else. I miss being able to walk to Trader Joe's and find seasonal treasures. What a strange thought: I hate grocery shopping but I love Trader Joe's. I hate cooking but I love the restaurant business. I am dazzled, is that so wrong?

I mentioned to Trent while we were packing switch openers that maybe I could own a restaurant someday. "Owning a restaurant is just babysitting employees like Neil is doing." I yelled at him not to poop all over my dreams and it was just some thought I had. He said "Oh no." I can't stand him whatsoever. I can never say or even think anything around him; I need to be myself behind his back and "plot", as he calls it, my future through secretive phone calls. That's why I have this diary: I need somewhere I can say all of the things in my head without any consequences or judgement. Just thinking about owning a restaurant one day doesn't affect my or Trent's life whatsoever.

Some Known Factual Statements About Best Frozen Fruits For Smoothies

Some Known Factual Statements About Fresh Frozen Fruit Indicators on Frozen Fruit Smoothie Mix You Need To Know

Frozen fruits are excellent for generally any type of occasion: breakfast, a snack, in a smoothie mix, a healthy and balanced treat ... the possibilities are truly countless. While a lot of nutritional experts say that nutrient damages from cold is very minimal, it's essential to keep in mind that (relying on the water web content of the fruit) the loss of specific antioxidants like beta-carotene is feasible during the freezing process.

Icing up fruits on your own at the height of ripeness may in fact slow the ripening or degeneration process, preserving the levels of certain healthy nutrients, like vitamins, minerals and also phytochemicals. Actually, the pre-packaged frozen variation may be no even worse than the fresh, which will commonly experience some nutrition loss during its trip from farm to supermarket.

Throughout the cold procedure, the water inside the fruit's cells broadens as it freezes, which in some cases triggers cell membranes to swell or burst, resulting in a softer structure when the fruit is thawed. The remedy? Eat the icy fruit when it's still frozen http://edition.cnn.com/search/?text=frozen fruits (so refreshing), coat it in chocolate or pop it in a blender, in which case the appearance won't make a distinction.

Frozen Blueberries Things To Know Before You Get This

What Does Frozen Fruit Salad Do?

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Experiment with these 6, as well as you'll be well on your method to icy fruit happiness. Katherine Carroll Water web content: 74% Frozen bananas are not only tasty, but are likewise a terrific way to protect and obtain extra usage out of excessively ripe bananas. If you're trying to find a healthy and balanced treat choice, try banana "good" cream, a simple version of "gelato" that has just one ingredient: icy bananas.

Get rid of the peels before cold to make them a lot easier to eat as soon as iced up. Anika Mian Water web content: 81% Undoubtedly, I'm not a significant follower of regular grapes, but when frozen, they transform, coming to be much sweeter as well as taking on a nearly ice cream-like structure. Grapes are well-known for being a high-sugar fruit, yet at just 62 calories per mug, they pale in contrast to a "tiny" late-night snack, like a solitary cup of Ben & Jerry's Cookie Dough Ice Lotion (540 calories).

Anika Mian Water content: 85% I didn't assume anything might be more refreshing than blueberries until I uncovered the Holy Grail: icy blueberries. Stay with the frozen selection, and also never ever again will you have to experience via the discomfort of out-of-season berries (read: mushy or tasteless). You can purchase them in gallon bags, yet I directly suggest cold them right in the carton.

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How Buy Frozen Fruit Online can Save You Time, Stress, and Money.

Table of ContentsSome Known Factual Statements About Fruit Smoothie Frozen Fruit The Best Guide To Fresh FruitsNot known Details About Frozen Fruit Bars Get This Report on Frozen Fruit Smoothie Mix

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When frozen, every bite preferences like a less-artificial Dreamsicle. Comparable to bananas, get rid of the peel prior to cold to ensure that you have easy access to the newly iced up items. Water material: 87% Icy raspberries melt in your mouth like a Hershey's kiss. Pop them in a blender or food processor with a little sugar and a splash of almond milk as well as you have actually obtained a hugely very easy raspberry sorbet.

Honestly, there are couple of things much better than coming residence to the view of a fruit-filled fridge freezer. Icy fruit is hands down the most convenient, healthiest as well as most tasty means to #treatyoself. Bear in mind, though, to stay with low-water-content fruits for far better taste, structure and total nutrient material.

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Whether your food store is out of your favorite fruit and vegetables or you're trying to limit your journeys to the supermarket, icy fruits as well as veggies are a great alternative. They can be a lot more nutritious than their fresh equivalents, as they're flash-frozen as well as will certainly maintain nutrients without ruining. And they're wonderful to carry hand when you wish to incorporate some healthy elements right into your meals.

They're nutrient-rich and also will certainly function in plenty of different recipeswe've also consisted of some dish suggestions to obtain you began. Polina Prokofieva/ShutterstockStrawberries are a morning meal (and also dessert) classic for a factor. They're high in vitamin C and are tasty in baked items, mixed right into smoothies, or offered atop yogurt or oatmeal for a hearty breakfast.

The Single Strategy To Use For Fresh Frozen Fruit

Ekaterina Kondratova/ShutterstockIf you can locate icy butternut squash at your regional supermarket, it deserves a buy! You can add the dices to baked mac as well as cheese for a nutritional boost, or roast the dices and also offer them atop a salad. The finest component? You do not have to do the job of chopping the squash yourself.

Here are 20 Hard-to-Find GroceriesAnd Where to Locate Them. ShutterstockFrozen peas are good for even more than אבקת חלבון calming your pains as well as discomforts! Adding peas to your meals will offer you an additional protein increase as well as supply you with greater than three grams of fiber, also. Enjoy them in stir-fries or added to soups.

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ShutterstockYou don't have to damage out the spiralizer each time you desire a pasta alternative. Brand Names like Trader Joe's and also Environment-friendly Giant offer spiralized zucchini, carrots, as well as a lot more. Throw them with pasta sauce or stir-fry them for a low-carb dinner. Try out your spiralized veggies in this recipe for Zucchini Pasta with Turkey Meatballs.

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Table of ContentsThe Ultimate Guide To Frozen Fruit SaladFrozen Fruit Drinks Things To Know Before You BuyFrozen Strawberries Can Be Fun For Everyone

Diana Taliun/ShutterstockWhatever method you purchase itcanned, frozen, or freshcorn is a delicious means to include even more flavor as well as nutrients to your meal. Usage frozen corn in homemade salsas or white chili dishes. We like these 20 Corn Recipes That Crush It. ShutterstockBroccoli is a great source of vitamin C, vitamin A, as well as vitamin K.

Try toasting it with garlic or sauting it stovetop for an easy side recipe. For a super-easy recipe, try these Broccoli-Cheese Eggs in a Mug. ShutterstockFresh cherries can be costly, so keeping the icy selection on your shopping checklist is a should if you're attempting to conserve money. Place the fruit to good use in this Wonderful as well as Creamy Chocolate-Covered Cherry Smoothie Dish Recipe.

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Use it in any kind of recipes where you 'd use normal rice! These 20 Cauliflower Rice Recipes are a wonderful place to start. ShutterstockNo, you can't go to your favorite sushi place during quarantine, however you can still make a scrumptious dish of edamame in your home. Just microwave some icy edamame, add a little salt, and also you're excellent to go.

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George Dolgikh/ShutterstockYou don't have to wait up until Thanksgiving rolls around to take pleasure in a tasty side recipe of Brussels sprouts. If you acquire them iced up, they're wonderful any kind of time of year! Try cooking them with bacon for a delicious addition to any dish. Try the veggie in this Brussels Sprouts Garnished With Bacon and also Almonds Dish.

How Fruit can Save You Time, Stress, and Money.

They do not need to be baked into a casseroleyou can cook frozen eco-friendly beans for an easy side dish to any kind of chicken supper. Try these 17 Good-for-You Eco-friendly Bean Recipes. ShutterstockAs with bananas, you may not find icy grapes in your food store. However you can freeze fresh grapes for a quick as well as simple treat! You can even utilize them to cool down your a glass of wine without watering it downall of these usages are why grapes are one of the 50 Foods You've Been Eating Wrong Your Whole Life.

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Registered Dietitian and also Nutritional expert Ilana Muhlstein shed her weight as well as kept it offand in You Can Drop It!, she'll reveal you how to lose it, also. More than 240,000 customers have actually picked her programand now it's your own to maintain.

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How Frozen Greens can Save You Time, Stress, and Money.

Table of ContentsFrozen Mangos Can Be Fun For AnyoneThe Ultimate Guide To Fruit Freeze

The potassium in cherries additionally makes them a terrific exercise recuperation snack (given that potassium is an electrolyte), so Cascio claims including them in a post-run or post-virtual exercise smoothie mix can help nourish muscle mass. One study published in the European Journal of Sports Science discovered that cherry concentrate result in less muscle mass soreness post-workout. "One more enjoyable reality concerning cherries is that they have melatonin, which is linked to better sleep," Cascio states.

Relevant Stories Okay, so you possibly aren't taking place any type of tropical holidays anytime soon, but at the very least you can obtain a preference of somewhere beachy with this frozen fruit. "Even when fresh papaya is difficult to get, almost every grocery store has actually iced up papaya," Cascio states. She's a fan of this fruit due to the fact that of its fiber, vitamin C, as well as beta-carotene (a forerunner to vitamin A) material.

" It has over 200 percent of the amount of vitamin C you need for the day." Take that, oranges. Cascio states that papaya can likewise help with irregular bowel movements and also bloating as a result of the enzyme papin, which aids digest healthy proteins. This makes it an excellent after-dinner snack. Attempt it by making vegan nice-cream; simply utilize your blender or food cpu to mix your icy papaya with the plant-based milk of your option.

The Best Strategy To Use For Frozen Tropical Fruit

The Ultimate Guide To Frozen Greens

( Or, follow this dish. It utilizes fresh papaya, but icy papaya functions simply as well.) Mango is an additional tropical fruit that isn't always easy to discover fresh, yet is offered frozen at almost every supermarket. Similar to papaya, Cascio says it also aids with food digestion due to the fact that it has lots of probiotics as well as fiber, both of which are vital completely gut wellness.

How Buy Frozen Strawberries can Save You Time, Stress, and Money.

" Some healthy eaters are delayed my mango since it's a high-sugar fruit, however because the fruit

<A long post> The SB and Mental Health

I don't know if I should put this out here or not, but it makes me really uncomfortable when the shoutbox turns into endless "mental health issue sharing time," especially when there are vague and not so vague suicidal ideations permeating through a lot of it.

I never know when things are serious or, well, "give me attention" SB users. I have empathy for whichever is the case. If you are actually so deep down the rabbit hole of depression you are thinking of ending your own life, please get help if you can. Tell a real life friend, or family member. I never want to find a deceased user profile, ever ever. If you feel so isolated that you want to just say it to get attention and sympathy with no real weight, I still will provide it, because I feel sorry for you if that is the case. The trouble is, one can never know for sure which it is.

This makes me really, really, really uncomfortable. Very few Subeta/SB users are licensed mental health professionals. Those who actually are can't actually give anonymous Subetans advice without incurring some legal ramifications if something goes badly. So what are the rest of us supposed to do? The only really useful (if overused to the point of not even being registered) response is to tell the user to get professional help (which is rarely the response you see). Beyond that, hearing people saying that they want to kill themselves or be dead makes me want to report them so their IP can be sent to local authorities etc. But of course we are not gonna report a user who is in pain, and you can't tell who is at real risk and who is SB-dramatica. Even if a bit facetiously I would say "better save one life and send a few extraneous ambulances that turn out to be fake" that's not how suicide watch really works. So with nothing legitimately helpful to do... it gets really uncomfortable.

Beyond that, you end up with either a "bandwagon" slurry of responses or further attention seeking. It's like anyone who says they are depressed/has anxiety/bipolar/etc. instantly has everyone else in the shoutbox jumping in so that they are not outdone in their suffering. This is so rarely done with the tone of offering helpful tools to one another; it's always like "oh you have depression and anxiety WELL I DO TOO IT'S SO BAD I AM AFRAID TO LEAVE THE HOUSE AND AM POOR AND I HATE MY LIFE PAY ATTENTION TO MEEEEE EVEN THOUGH YOU JUST SAID YOU WANT TO DIE" and I lurk there wondering why someone is basically ignoring the fact that a nice user has just said they write out suicide plans, as I awkwardly debate whether or not to involve staff.

Even worse are the "I ALSO diagnosed myself with depression but I hate -insert meds, doctors, therapists, people here- so I treat myself with -insert herbal supplement or daylight here-" responses. I'm glad that you got a nice placebo effect from your Trader Joe's tea, but if especially someone is at the point of considering suicide, or even if something is low-level suffering on the daily, they need PROFESSIONAL HELP. If you have to involve yourself, please restrain yourselves from having to be "right" or "different." Don't play doctor. Please tell them what they actually need to hear.

I am genuinely glad that the shoutbox is a place where people who are hurting can feel heard, but I'm not sure it's actually the right place for it. It puts other users in a hard and uncomfortable place because we know we cannot provide the right kind of help, and don't have any avenues to really do so. The situation is just made worse by the "bad help" or "bad solidarity" that arises. This has just gotten more and more prevalent and it seems that this is happening daily or more often now. I don't know guys. Am I the only one who feels this way?

How to Stock Your Pantry for the Semi-Apocalypse*

It’s been a rough couple of weeks for many of my friends in the United States, what with the pestilence, the lack of leadership, the hoarding in the supermarkets, and it’s not even the post-Apocalyptic dystopian future we were promised.

However, what’s been slowly creeping into my Facebook feed of late are the first hints of food boredom.

Even those who can afford to order in their favorite Chinese or Mexican, those menus are getting a bit long in the tooth. What once was an “every couple of weeks” guilty pleasure of General Tsao’s chicken, “special” fried rice and a bottle of your favorite twist-off cap Shiraz has lost its charm.

Anyone who follows my Instagram account knows that nothing comes between me, food and cocktails. I’m the guy who when answering the questionnaire at a new doctor’s office warily counters the “how many alcoholic drinks do you have a week” inquiry with a defensive, “Why do you need to know?”

“I hear you like to cook?” I’m often asked when being introduced to new friends and colleagues and my go-to answer is, “Yes, but I prefer to eat.”

And that’s why I cook. I wish I could say I find cooking to be this relaxing past-time, where I spend anywhere from 15-minutes to several hours whipping up a quick pasta sauce or creating a complex Indian curry, listening to Adelle or Carly Simon—a glass of Muscadet in hand. But, no. Cooking, for me, is an ordeal and a means to an end.

Homemade beef pho broth.

But that’s doesn’t mean it can’t be somewhat enjoyable; your food doesn’t have to be predictable or monotonous. And, if you’re going to be confined to your home for three to four weeks, this is where you have to improvise, to grab the whisk by the handle and make the magic happen.

The Basics

First, if you’re entering week three of isolation and it’s time to hit the markets, let’s think smart and make sure your fridge and pantry are stocked with the vitals. If you have food allergies or adopted a lifestyle that has dietary restrictions, please, swap out as needed.

Some of you have been furloughed or lost your jobs, so this is a reasonably priced list offering staples that will last a long time and give days, if not weeks, and in some cases, months of value. Buy what you feel is necessary. As Stephen Casuto, host and creator of one of my favorite cooking shows, Not Another Cooking Show, says, “You, do you.”

“Table salt is disgusting and should only be used for rubbing into the wounds of your enemies.”

The Carbs:

Pasta — enough for at least six meals for two people with leftovers, or three meals for four people (spaghetti/linguini and some kind of tube or macaroni—rotini, fusilli. etc.)

Rice — My old standby is Jasmine rice. Prepared properly it can be used in all kinds of dishes—plain, Mexican, Spanish, Asian, Indian, Italian.

The Vegetables:

Potatoes—Technically, a carb, but, hey. Both waxy (Yuko Golds, Red Bliss or similar) and floury (Idaho, Russet or similar). Keep in a cool, dry drawer, these can last for weeks if stored properly.

Preparing the base for a Pasta Fagioli soup.

Carrots—Large ones with their greens preferred, but if the hoarders have bought all those, then freakish manicured baby carrots.

Tomatoes—firm, preferably on the vine and not quite ripe yet. Only get about four to six so you will use them and they won’t rot and go to waste. Great for sandwiches, avocado toast, chopped into an omelet.

Onions—Yellow and Red (Yellow for most of the sauteeing and cooking you’re going to do, and red for fresh salads, sandwiches, and salsas)

Garlic—Two to three decent-sized bulbs, stored with the onions and potatoes. (Remember: Warm and humid makes your garlic and onions grow into stinky house plants.)

The easy and delicious weekday sauce.

Peppers—Depending on what you love or what you can tolerate, get at least two bell peppers or Italian green peppers, maybe a handful of hot red birdseye chillis, or some habaneros. These will add color and sparkle to everything from a salad to some scrambled eggs.

Celery—I’m of two minds when it comes to celery. First, it’s a vital part of mirepoix, that magical combination of onions, carrots, and celery that’s the basis of most Western soups and stews. But, unless you’re on a rabbit diet, people tend to buy it, use less than half a bunch in one minestrone soup then end up chucking the rest away. But, hey, you’re the cook.

Herbs—Get the dried kind out of desperation: bay leaves, oregano, thyme, rosemary. But, always get fresh parsley and basil.

Dried Goods:

Flour—White, all-purpose flour and Cornmeal (making cornbread for breakfast is a simple warm treat. Everyone should be able to cook this from scratch).

Thickeners—Corn starch, potato starch; I recently discovered xanthan gum and if you’re one of those folks taken by “molecular gastronomy” or food as a science project, this is one of the weirder thickening agents on the market.

Cornbread can be made in less than an hour.

Leavening Agents—Baking soda and baking powder. (Unless you’ve decided you really love baking artisanal bread, you really don’t need yeast).

Salt—Preferably sea salt, or kosher salt. Remember different salts have different salinities, so a “pinch” of pink Himalayan salt is less salty than a similar size “pinch” of Morton’s Table Salt, which, by the way, is disgusting and should only be used for rubbing into the wounds of your enemies. So, get a salt that fits your budget, your health needs, and your personal flavor profile. I prefer sea salts, they have a richness I like and I feel I can control seasoning better.

Pepper—Black peppercorns, of course, but nothing beats having a box or container of white pepper. It’s got a completely different flavor profile than black pepper and adds a wonderful heat to everything from mashed potatoes to cream soups.

Eggs and Dairy

Milk—If you’re lactose intolerant or vegan/vegetarian you can substitute soy milk or your favorite substitute here, but not almond milk because that shit is a ripoff and is killing the planet.

Cream—You will want this for mashed potatoes and to thicken some sauces.

Butter—Always buy Kerrygold Irish Butter, salted and unsalted. It’s the best butter out there. Fight me.

Making a chicken curry from scratch

Plain Yogurt—I prefer Greek yogurt myself. It’s handy to have around and a great way to add richness to a baked item if you only have low-fat milk or to make a quick fresh fruit breakfast.

Cheese—If you must, get a bag of shredded cheddar and a bag of “parmesan”. Cheeses are personal taste, I love fatty, creamy, stinky cheeses, but, honestly, they don’t last long and they are an extravagance for many people at this time. So, get what you like, but make sure you at least have a nice chunk of quality cheddar or similar cheese around.

Eggs—A dozen, big ones. Free-range if you feel guilty.

This Singapore-style laksa is easy and quick.

A Bit of the Sweet

Sugar—Processed sugar is evil. Now that we’ve got that out of the way, always have some handy. It’s great to throw a tablespoon into a tomato-based sauce to offset the acidity. And there is nothing like a lovely stack of homemade pancakes covered in melted butter, a sprinkling of sugar and a squeeze of fresh lemon juice.

Brown Sugar—Less sweet, a little smokey and great for Asian broths that ask for processed sugar. And, it’s “good” for you because, you know, it’s not processed.

Maple Syrup—For pancakes and French Toast.

Condiments:

Ketchup—Whatever you like. Though raised on American Heinz ketchup, I prefer the British brands that tend to use a little more vinegar, but that is an acquired taste.

Mayonaise—The magical base for so many different dressings and sauces. Yes, I will sit down with a plate of french fries or steak-cut chips and a cup of mayo and just go to town on that. Also, dipping cold, boiled chicken that’s torn into strips and wrapped in chilled, crisp iceberg lettuce into mayo while drinking a dry white wine on a hot summer’s day is one of God’s little miracles.

Fried halloumi cheese on a run of the mill avocado toast makes it better.

Mustard—Go ahead, buy French’s American Mustard in a squeeze jar. I don’t judge. But, please get some good Dijon Mustard, and some English Mustard, wet or the powder, is really handy to have for extra punch.

Vinegar—Plain old white vinegar if you're on a budget, but red wine, is also good. Italian balsamic if you want to live large, but I find a bottle of Japanese rice wine vinegar is the perfect all-rounder.

Hot sauce—Tobasco and Siraccha are my go-to faves, but you know what you like.

Olive Oil—Get Extra-Virgin and plain. the EVOO is great for both cooking and for finishing dishes and for cold dressings and sauces. Plain olive oil is great for adding flavor to simple fried sauces and dishes.

Vegetable Oil—A good neutral oil is Canola. It won’t kill you.

Prepared Foods

Canned Goods—at least one can of each: chickpeas, black beans, and kidney beans. Also, a can of mushrooms and a couple of cans of diced green chillis. Two to three 24-ounce cans of Italian tomatoes, with our without basil.

Frozen vegetables—A package of corn and a package of peas. One package of mixed vegetables for making quick healthy soups.

Broths and stocks—Beef, chicken, and vegetable. Fish stock for the more adventurous. (If you haven’t had sliced potatoes slow-cooked in fish stock, I totally recommend it, simple and delicious.) I always buy low-sodium because my body is, like, you know, a temple. 🙄

Actually, always try to purchase low sodium processed foods, that gives you, the cook, more power over the seasoning of your meals.

Thai beef soup with beef balls.

Now, you’re thinking, why is this guy torturing us with pictures of beautiful, exotic home-cooked meals? Why are so many of the “basics” not as exciting as the final products?

That’s because now is the time to get what I’ll call…

The New Basics

You’ve hit the local Vons, or Trader Joe’s, Publix or Wegman’s; you’ve emptied your wallet at Whole Foods and Kroeger, now let’s get some real food. Head down to your local Asian supermarket, or your local South American/Mexican supermarket, because this is where it gets interesting.

The Carbs:

Noodles—From Japanese soba, udon and Hokkaido (ramen) noodles to the long, translucent Vietnamese and Thai rice noodles to the tightly wound, sometimes flavored Chinese noodle nests, most of these keep a long time in a dry cool place and they cook quickly offering alternative tastes and textures.

The Vegetables:

Fresh Ginger Root—it’s ugly and essential, but it can change the flavor of everything from a simple broth to a quick scrambled egg into a culinary adventure. No, don’t peel it with a spoon, that’s silly. Just use a sharp knife on the extraneous knobbly bits and then use a vegetable peeler like a normal person. Honestly, I see the YouTube chefs wrestling with a chunk of ginger and a tablespoon and I just shake my head.

Choy Sum and/or Bak Choy—Definitely hunt these down at the Asian grocer. They stay fresh longer in a good vegetable crisper in your fridge; they’re easy to clean and prepare and cook very quickly.

Chayote—A green, waxy squash that is like a more flavorful cucumber, with a great texture. Add it to all your veggie soups, or saute it with some garlic. Just handy. And keeps in the fridge for a long time.

Condiments:

Soy sauce—Get both kinds, dark soy sauce and light soy sauce. The difference isn’t the color, it’s the viscosity and the flavor. Dark soy sauce is actually somewhat sweet, unctuous and thick and adds deep rich flavors to stews, soups, and sauces. Soy sauce is a nice alternative to just seasoning with salt. Get low sodium, if dietary restrictions are in place, but you don’t really need to use too much, so, I always go with regular.

Chili Oils/Pastes—Much like the fresh peppers, this is all about personal taste. I love spicy food, but I’m not a fan of heat for heat’s sake. So, no a jalapeno margarita where I can’t taste anything or feel my lips is not a great culinary experience. Still, always have these little miracle jars handy, you control the heat by how much or how little you add to the dish you’re preparing. My three faves are traditional Chinese chili garlic sauce, Chiu Chow chili oil, and Calabrian chili oil.

Vinegar — Plain old white vinegar if you’re on a budget, but red wine, is also good. Italian balsamic if you want to live large, but I find a bottle of Japanese rice wine vinegar is the perfect all-rounder.

Fish sauce—Don’t let the name and smell deter you, a spoonful of this elixir in a soup or dressing adds a lovely saltiness and brightness.

Sesame Oil—Plain or toasted. This is for flavor only, really. You can add it to dressings, or add it to vegetable oil when sauteeing, but you can’t cook with it because it burns very quickly; that said, it gives a great depth of flavor to any dish you add it to.

Frozen Foods:

Dumplings—Either factory-made or handmade, Asian dumplings are inexpensive, delicious and easy to prepare. Beef, pork, shrimp, and vegetable or a combination of two or more fillings are always available. Korean dumplings tend to be larger. Wontons are light and mostly shrimp or shrimp and pork. If you’re lucky to have a vibrant Asian community, find the “Mom and Pop” store that makes both noodles and dumplings. Fresh dumplings are usually packed with a light dusting of corn or potato starch so they can be easily frozen.

Asian-style meatballs—OK, now these have a texture that takes a little getting used to, but they are packed with protein and flavor and cook up in seconds in a frying pan or in a soup. Pork, beef, and shrimp are the most popular. I love them and find they really make a noodle soup a quick, but truly satisfying meal.

Canned Goods:

Coconut Milk—From Indian to Thai to Malaysian cuisine, this is mother’s milk. Get a couple of cans.

Peppers—Canned chipotles. Smoked in a flavorful sauce, a little goes a long way here. But you can add these to soups and basic stews to create great depths of heat and flavor.

Okay, now this is by no means a definitive list, but it’s enough I think to give you as many options as you can once you return home and prepare for the next few weeks of personal time.

As you’ve seen, I’ve included links to some of my favorite recipes with the pictures, it’s from these recipes that I reevaluated and changed how I stock my fridge and pantry.

It’s also helped inform my cooking. Bored with cereal and toast, and fried eggs, or scrambled eggs or an omelet with bacon, one morning I created what is now my favorite, flavorful, high protein, yet not too filling breakfast; scrambled eggs and dumplings. It’s my recipe, inspired by other more traditional recipes and the food I had available at the time. It’s what Chef John from the delightful Food Wishes refers to as “that’s just you, cooking.”

The First Recipe

Ingredients:

Three eggs, room temperature, well beaten, preferably in a metal bowl with a whisk

One to two scallions or a half/third of a small yellow onion, finely chopped

One chili pepper (in this case, a Thai green chili), finely chopped.

Four to six frozen Asian dumplings depending on what type

2 Tablespoons — Vegetable oil

1 Tablespoon — Sesame oil

Chiu Chow chili oil or Sriracha

Soy Sauce

Salt

In a small saucepan bring water to a boil. In a small frying pan add your vegetable oil, the onions, and chilis and some salt and turn on the heat.

You want the onions and chilis to cook slowly and sweat, not burn or brown so keep an eye on them and keep stirring.

Now once the vegetables are cooked and the kitchen smells delicious, add a tablespoon of sesame oil into vegetables and lower the heat.

Now, the water should be at a rolling boil. Add the dumplings. I used Korean pork dumplings this morning. They only take three to five minutes to cook. You will know they are done when they float and spin freely in the water.

Now, turn up the heat of the frying pan and add in the eggs, keep stirring and cook the eggs as you like them. Take the eggs off the heat, the residual heat should finish the cooking.

Meanwhile, the dumplings should be cooked. Strain them and place them in the bottom of a bowl. Then scoop over the eggs, finish with a tablespoon or two of soy sauce and the chili sauce of your choosing.

This is a 15-minute breakfast, tops. I hope this was helpful. It’s a trying time for everyone and many of us are fortunate enough to have a roof over our heads that we can cower under. This is an opportunity for reflection, but also to make the most of your family or companions. For those of you living alone, treat yourself to a culinary feast once in a while.

I say cooking is an ordeal, but it’s also a celebration. A chance to be creative and offer comfort, if not for yourself, for the people you live with and love.

Go break an egg.

*This article is the inspiration for this blog and was previously published on Medium.