I want to read all quiet on the western front but i know it will make me suicidal. Then i feel guilty for not wanting to suffer that because a lot of people actually go through war and dont have a choice.

This thought constantly paralyzes me. At the end of the day, me reading or not reading this book does nothing to affect the world. Me commenting or not commenting on it will make no difference. But i feel judged, i feel haunted, i feel like a terrible person for wanting to escape something which will harm me just because i am able to escape.

This is what performative activism does to people.