#ignore the typos and weird grammar here it’s stream of consciousness in the tags and no beta readers
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feeling a lot of gender feelings
#hmmm………………..#mostly in relation to my bisexuality?#like my relationship with femininity has always been so??? distant#always felt like I was on stage expected to recite lines for a play/character I’d never even heard of before#idk….#like I’m attracted to femininity but I’m also alienated by it?#and I’ve always felt so… neutral? like I wanna feel feminine but?#I’ll say shit like ‘women have to deal with so much shit THEY deserve so much better’#like babe… you’re supposed to be one of THEM?#but yeah… I don’t feel androgynous per se#at least what my understanding of white washed tradition androgyny is which is most definitely flawed and skewed#idk#thinking thoughts#I wouldn’t call this gender dysphoria either#at least I don’t think it is?#if anyone knows please let me know#it’s idk#just write is the reason I’m even thinking of this#his Why Mulan Mattered video kinda made me realize that THIS is what I’ve been feeling my whole life#ignore the typos and weird grammar here it’s stream of consciousness in the tags and no beta readers#queer thoughts being thunk
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