"darling," he whispers, ever so softly, the rasp in his voice reverberating through you and making you shiver. he chuckles silently at the little squeaks that leave your lips whenever your hips slam down on his cock as you look down at him with those pretty eyes of yours. for some reason, whenever he looks into them, they remind him of the stars he was so close to once upon a time. something that should be a bad memory but really isn't because you make it more nostalgic, in some kind of mysterious way. you almost make him miss it.

your hands are gripping onto his shoulders for dear life, nails digging into his skin in a way that should be painful, but instead just makes everything feel ten times better. he has a hand on your hip, gripping it firmly, his fingers forming slight dents in your skin. his free hand is wandering over your body, moving up from your clit to your tits, pinching your sensitive buds. he swears he's falling even more in love with you when you toss your head back and let out a long whine of pleasure when he does so. you look so beautiful.

how are you even real? he wonders. he's never had eyes for anyone the way he has eyes for you. he's seen and experienced so many beautiful things, explored so many different worlds in his dreams, in his past lives, but none of them compare to you. anything in any universe that is considered beautiful is nothing when it comes to you.

the way you moan his name is like the strings that play in his mind when he's feeling the rush of his highs, but somehow you're always able to make them sound like a beautiful symphony instead of just a jumble of noise like it used to be, before you. he wonders what type of magic you hold inside of you that makes you capable of making even the ugliest and most broken of things look so beautiful. he notices your legs are giving up on you and smiles at how endearing it is, the fact that you're practically struggling, but you need him so badly you're doing everything you can to keep up your movements. his hand grips your hip tighter, almost enough to bruise your skin, and he moves his free hand to your lower back to help you keep your balance.

he wonders, for a moment, if he knew you in the past life, or all those years ago. he can't really remember since it's been so long, and the memories of when he was cast out of heaven clouded his brain. but it's almost as if he can see for a brief second, something otherworldly when he looks at you, the way your skin glows with splendor when your back arches as you cum on his cock. for a moment it's like you're a real life angel right in front of him, it's such a sight to behold. was god testing him? were you sent to him as a lesson in disguise? would you be gone as soon as this was all over? whatever it was, he didn't care, as long as he got to feel you as close as possible even if you turned out to not be real when he opened his eyes again.

it's almost a relief when he does and he sees you there, still on top of him, panting heavily, eyes hooded, hair sticking to your face. a beautiful mess. the most gorgeous thing he's ever seen. he's so in love with you. he reaches up to brush your hair off of your damp cheeks, smiling and delicately taking your chin to make you look at him, his thumb brushing over your lower lip, the way you lean down to kiss him and smile against his lips making everything feel a little more real.

more real and alive, he thinks. he's never felt more alive than when he sees you like this—beautiful and wild and messy in all the right ways, all for him, because of him. there was nothing better than being able to love you in such a pure way, without repercussion, no matter how terrifying it was, because you remind him of himself before everything. before the jealousy and fury, before he fell from heaven and got his wings stripped from his back, before he was disowned by god himself. the fallen angel was redeemed from the depths of hell and found his heaven in your embrace, in your eyes, in you. you're everything he's ever wanted.

tagged by @bllvkbird​ to answer these questions!

name/nickname : yam

gender : i’ve struggled with gender in the past so it’s hard to have a concrete answer for me but i do use she/her pronouns

star sign : pisces

height : 164cm i think? (5′3)

time : 10:38am

birthday : march 5

fav band : currently into gorillaz and ninja sex party (does the glee cast count?)

fav solo artist : dont know if shes a fave but i do listen to a bit of taylor swift

song stuck in my head : lover by taylor swift (of course its one of my valerie/garrus songs oof)

last movie : midsommer

last show : miraculous ladybug

when i created this blog : 2019

what i post : video games (mainly mass effect and dragon age), gifsets

last thing i googled : habsburgs (a podcast i was listening to mentioned them and i had no idea who they were)

other blogs : my glee blog lol i dont use it as much anymore but it was my main blog before coming to this one

do i get asks : nope lol

following : 147

why i chose my URL : irisviel is my inquisitor and it was all i could think of at the time

followers : 106

average hours of sleep : 4-6 hours

instruments : none

dream job : dont know if it counts as a job but i wanna be good enough at art where i could make money off it

fav food : idk honestly,,,

nationality : aboriginal australian

fav song : i have too many to pick 

top 3 fictional universes i’d like to live in : at the moment, its mainly mass effect just coz i wanna date a turian lol (maybe during a time when the reapers aren’t starting a war tho lol)

as usual i wont tag anyone coz i dont know that many people, oof, but feel free to do this and say that i tagged you!

Hi!! So this is an honest question so i hope it doesnt come off as rude or anything- but doesn't the thought that everything you post here can be reblogged make you more reserved or anything? Idk how to explain it but whenever i wanna post something here i think about doing it for a super long time to be sure i want it to possibly be on the internet forever- but i see you're comfortable with sharing pretty personal stuff so i was just wondering if it affected you any way or maybe it was just me?

lmaooo it’s cool!!! there’s an unending AMA going on here and off the top of my head i can’t think of anything off-limits to ask about

it’s definitely not just you!! out of the ppl i know off the top of my head i’m probably really far and away doing the Most airing my bullshit. if you ultimately don’t like the idea of stuff just kinda sitting around to be seen by Anyone, that’s valid and there’s no problem with feeling like that makes you wanna Not Post some stuff

like this is especially true for young teens on the soche media…hell i just entirely threw out the blog i’d had from like 14 -18, and not because i was particularly embarrassed or anything, it just felt mostly obsolete. you can become someone so different in even one year and that’s fine and you might not want Old Venting and the like just sitting around out there. it’s definitely okay to be real private about that kinda stuff

i know sometimes ppl having sorta Compromises where maybe they’ll create a second blog / account specifically for talking abt personal stuff, and then only maybe allow friends (or nobody) to access it; or people will just tag everything with Delete Later and then go back and delete it later so it’s not out there forever, or just because they find it embarrassing soon afterwards lol

for my part, there’s definitely multiple reasons i pretty much don’t care

1. i never used to Vent post back in the early days. but one of my earliest examples maybe was this sudden essay i dumped on my blog when i was 16? 17? abt how unhappy i was at home. it took me till i was 18 to really start to realize that what i’d always lived with was literally abuse, and it was things like The Sudden Venting Essay that really helped me put it all into words and be able to organize my thoughts enough to write about it and realize that there was a lottttt of shit i was rly miserable about2. ever since then really i’ve found that when i write about something, whether messaging it to someone or just posting it in general, a ton of times it helps me kinda make connections or figure something out or just feel like i have a better grasp on an idea.3. even after i started maybe doing the occasional venting post, for a long time i was really hesitant about it, but this was mostly b/c i felt like i didn’t have ~real~ enough problems and/or nobody would really care. as for the former, well yesterday i was saying how i still have this underlying feeling that i’m an imposter / don’t count / not REALLY as ___ as other people or whatever, so i’m still working on that, but it definitely doesn’t upset me as much as it might back in the day. re: the latter—tbh i dont care if nobody cares. i write abt personal shit b/c i care. my entire blog is About and Because i care, and if other people care, great, if they don’t, ok.4. a lot of this is about having compassion for myself. i don’t look down on other people for making personal posts, so i don’t look down on myself, either. 5. more self-compassion: there’s probably olden text posts from the early days of this blog that don’t even sound like me coz my Outer Demeanor has changed a lot these past 5 or 2 or 1 yrs. but even if i stumbled across some Old Post of mine and was like “lmfao whats up w THIS loser” it’s like….well, i’m sympathetic to my Earlier Selves. this applies to like, me never deleting Late Night Sad Posts or whatever (even tho nowadays they’re never exactly like i’m upset, maybe just Melancholy or in a mood to talk abt something saddish) coz i’m like, well, even though rn i don’t feel like i Need this post, back then i did feel like venting to feel better! and that’s fine. i don’t find that embarrassing. it’s like if you’re thirsty on one day and you drink some water and at some random point during the next evening when you’re not thirsty you think back on that time you were drinking water and you’re like “wow, embarrassing.” well clearly its not a perfect analogy but the point is sometimes you might feel you need to talk, and sometimes you don’t, and both times are ok. its not an embarrassment to have been upset6. this blog is the most personal thing in the world for me lmao its my Main social media presence, goes back five yrs, and for like. well the whole five years its been what keeps me from being way more isolated than i am. irl friends have been long distance this whole time (save a couple exceptions) and mostly my way to talk to ppl has been on here. this was especially important when i was at my parents house for a couple yrs. it was fairly awful and being able to be in touch w ppl and being able to SAY it was awful was clearly important, and i became more inclined to write abt shit rather than hold myself back b/c my being able to say anything was important7. i still talk about things b/c being able to say anything here to people in the outside world is important8. i can’t be like “i cant talk abt this b/c its not important/interesting enough” coz if i did i wouldn’t talk abt anything. i just write b/c i have things to say, and this is my pointless blog9. i don’t expect i’ll ever become Well Known in any circles. for me the more likely concern is kinda disappearing either due to dying or incarceration or some other shit scenario. the times i talk on here are good b/c that hasnt happened yet and i have the option10. even if i did become well known, i don’t really care.11. also for uh…all the times i was living in my parents house thru my life i was really really isolated. for eons i was used to nobody knowing shit abt me and keeping p much all my thoughts to myself. nowadays this blog is what lets me be able to sorta Known and Seen and able to get in touch w ppl if we wanna. basically, there’s nothing TOO personal. i’m not even trying to push myself to “overshare” coz like i said, p much nothing is offlimits. i’ve just had a lifetimes worth of being very invisible and unknown to anyone12. actually i can still be very cagey abt myself in person. learning to be more open On Here is a bit helpful for that. 13. idk that anyone else would give a shit about old vent posts from me either. when i talk abt me im talking abt *me*, its really not even vaguely interesting when removed even one degree from that specific context. 14. maybe there’s the chance some shit will happen to be Relatable to other ppl and somehow helpful to them15. for example, a lot of how i realized i was actually experiencing abuse for real was thru anecdotal / qualitative posts abt it. sometimes there’s shit you think is Just You only b/c nobody else who it applies to is talking about it yknow16. maybe making it seem less a big deal to talk abt your bullshit if i unapologetically talk abt my bullshit17. i remember my younger self feeling like i didnt ~deserve~ to talk abt my own thoughts & feelings the way other ppl did coz mine weren’t as good, so i kinda do it for them / in celebration of no longer feeling that way18. i actually like to talk. i just usually can’t. irl i very very very very rarely talk at length about myself, i don’t talk much at all. for me this is where i get to talk19. hmm i may have skipped or forgotten something obvious but hey. for now, there’s this. no-limits milo they call me

ok im kinda tired from studying all day and i just watched the latest episode, and ive got some thoughts??? but im not in the best state of mind to articulate everything so imma just do some dot points:

- letting everyone have a go as a superhero: i dont agree with; it sort of trivialises that kind of power and is contradictory to master fu’s own experiences with his carelessness,,, like did you even learn anything from hawkmoth lmao... idk why but this thing upset/made me most uncomfortable, it just seems like a lot of carelessness, but tbh this is also a kids show with a kids audience so i guess you do have to sacrifice some elements of common sense/rational thought and action/general consistency with fu’s decisions for some Cool Heroes and Fun New Powers

- leading on from this, what is our position on how we treat kwamis?? : these are sentient beings, these are actual gods ( i think?? i havent read the comics), who are chained to a miraculous. what is our (by that inclusive, im referring to the characters in the show + the actual audience + producers) actual position on them?? so we respect them as mentors and guides + actual gods, but do we also treat them with the same triviality as the miraculous object itself??? something to give away and lock up at will, something to utilise only in times of need?? and those are only in part rhetorical qqs, im genuinely curious and i wont judge if thats the way things are

- chat noir and rena rouge: y’all can argue that their interactions were strictly platonic but imma fight for this; he was blatantly flirting with her. he kissed her hand, he was *casually* leaning against his baton, leaning in towards her, ok admittedly, i know french culture is a lot more direct and touchy than western culture and i havent down my research lmao but it felt a lot like he was interested??? i mean these are the same stuff he does to ladybug??? and alya (maybe she saw it as just platonic) but she also indulged him even tho shes already in a relationship ??? lol idek maybe its just me, but the first introduction made me feel uncomfortable coz of that (the second interaction was much more platonic tho)

- keeping chat noir out of the loop: ive seen a lot about this already on the tags, and 100% agree. at this point i dont know what to make of the relationship between lb and cn. @the ml producers, whether you wanna sell them as partners or as a duo where ladybug is the Main, ill support, but pls: consistency. i feel like theyve always been presented as a partnership, like two parts of one whole, but this ep kinda went against that? marinette has visited fu many times (implied), he allowed her to choose a hero, he himself explained all that detail about the miraculous’ to her, she left chat noir to fend for himself (without explaining the plan) while she went to find fu. adrien, who took gabriel’s book to learn more himself, didnt even get the chance to learn properly. and i bet that had he been given the opportunity to read, lb wouldve been the first person he went to. partnership = developing together, making decisions together, being transparent and clear w/ each other. i didnt see that today. what i saw was something more akin to batman and robin, hero and sidekick

- development/consistency w/ ladybug and chat noir’s (general) relationship: again, ik this is a kids show, and each episode is meant to be independent of each other, and there isnt a fixed sense of continuity. and this dot point sort of touches on the last 2 as well, but a change in the dynamic had so much potential to progress on ladybug and chat noir’s relationship (there could’ve been conflict, there could’ve been insecurities, there could’ve been distance, esp. following the Glaciator ep). the producers could’ve used this opportunity to see a shift in their general relationship + some solid characterisation (in relation to their partnership/dynamic) and actually lay some solid groundwork beyond the whole lovesquare thing.

- alya in general: ok so a positive: some good characterisation for alya. it was gr8 to see some more insight about her family dynamic, her own interactions w/ her siblings, the type of person she is beyond school and the ladyblog. shes undoubtedly worthy to receive that miraculous; headstrong, focused, learns quickly (thats a bonus). but i gotta agree with some of the posts circulating, marinette, as professional as she can be when she has to, is still ultimately biased. master fu tells her himself to choose someone she trusts (according to the translation i got), and doesnt that entail some subjectivity??? thats not to say that she chose her just bcoz theyre friends because marinette would be blind not to see all these gr8 qualities in her bff. but like ppl are saying, i think alya shouldve been chosen by virtue by the guardian, who knows these miraculous’ more than anyone, knows the sort of characters each miraculous is suited to, instead of marinette randomly selecting one and giving it to her best friend.

- gabriel: is a hypocrite and does not deserve to be a parent, but what else is  new lmao