#i'm glad you felt safe enough to be this vulnerable anon that shit can be hard to do but it is *so* important | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

uncanny-tranny · 1 year

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For transexual Thursday;

Transitioning made me want to live, i struggled with suicide since i was VERY small and i couldn't imagine me having a future. But after a almost if not fully 2 years on t and about almost 4 months after top surgery i can finally feel at peace.

It feels like i belong in this body, that i was destined to form it like clay, my little art project just ment for me and my enjoyment.

I can finally see myself in the mirror and cry in happiness instead of pain, feeling like "yes i am attractive i deserve to love myself and think my body and i are great".

After years of struggle my soul,mind,brain and body are in unity, still separately due to trauma and how i see the word due to different things, but now all are working together instead of tearing each other down.

I love being trans and how complex my identity is due to my experience, culture and autism, it is so much fun finding things that put my feelings in words, discovering more and more who i am, now that I'm at peace with my body.

I love the scars on my chest and that their not picture perfect prettiness telling a story on their own. When i feel down and insecure i look at them and take care of them as a sign to my body that i love it and that I'm so grateful how far it went how much it fought even tho i wished so many times that it just gave up. Within it i wouldn't be able to finally know and feel happiness to know how it feels like to be alive and not survive not knowing if the next day is my last.

Transitioning saved my live and teached me how wonderful live can be.

And while i still fear for my live due to the political climate i am no longer afraid to die if i know i can die as the person i always was. I will fight for my right to know happiness and use the strength i have gathered to fight for other trans people because no one deserve to feel like i did in the past.

That hopefully they also can feel the joy of being trans and how wonderful it can be.

(sorry if it came of as rambling i have the tendency to do that)

Sculpting who you are, to throw yourself on the pottery wheel and, with careful, loving hands, making who you are is such a monumental moment. It's the single-best thing about being able to become, I think

#ask #anon #transsexual thursday #suicide tw #suicide mention tw #i'm glad you felt safe enough to be this vulnerable anon that shit can be hard to do but it is *so* important #it's something i still struggle with so i always notice and admire when people actually do do it

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