i often think my current goth lifestyle came out of nowhere considering i was afraid of everything as a child, including like, goosebumps covers (i never read them bc they looked too scary) but then i remember my deep fascination and borderline obsession with funeral traditions and burial rites has been there since i was like 9 years old playing zelda windwaker and carefully stopping to arrange all the dropped weapons from all the enemies i killed in X shapes around the room in respectful memory of my defeated foes and i remember how i had a model set of an egyptian mummy who could be opened to remove his plastic organs and had bandages to wrap him in and how much i loved and cared for my little dead man n then i realize i may have always been like this actually