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#i do love writing angst tho
avatar-anna · 15 days
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I need more young dadrry angst for my angsty loving self. I just wanna feel something 😩
i can only put them through so much😭
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rendevok · 10 months
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“Take my hand” a comic for NaruMitsu Week 2023
day 1 - lies & secrets - 2 - 3 - 4
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crybaby-bkg · 2 years
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I love jealous Bakugou who starts peacocking after a while to get all of your attention.
going to a party and Kiri carelessly picks you up to spin you during a dance, drunken laughter shared between you two. Bakugou watches on the couch the whole time, eyes slitted as he nurses the same beer he’s had all night. he listens to you giggle over the music about how strong Kiri is and—fuck it, he’ll show you strength. he takes the opportunity to scoop you off of your feet next time you guys are out and there’s a puddle in the middle of the road, puffs his chest out a little as he cradles you against him, when you let out that lighthearted giggle but for him this time.
Bakugou catches you chatting deku up, squeezing at his biceps when you tease him about how big he’s been getting. you only do it bc you know it flusters the green haired man, and you think it’s cute how he looks like a strawberry whenever you coo at him. But Bakugou only sees that as the push to go to the gym more, focusing even more on his arms, wearing all of his tanks around you. puffs his chest out again when he puts his arms behind his head and you pat at the bulging muscle and find yourself tracing the veins on his arms.
He sees you dancing with Sero at another squad gathering, something fast and sensual, your arms around his neck while he holds your waist. his face is buried into your neck and it makes you giggle whenever he whispers where to move your feet next. and does Bakugou take that as an active threat against his crush on you? of course he does. finds himself holding you against him at a party, swaying with you, way out of his comfort zone but he wants to show you that he can dance too, damnit.
Denki makes some offhanded comment about holding your bags when you go out to an amusement park, something else about going with you when you need the bathroom too. Bakugou is most definitely shoving him out of the way, manhandling all of your bags from you as he pushes you in the direction of the bathrooms instead. finds his chest practically spilling out of his shirt when you hug him by the end of the night, thanking him for being so kind, telling him that he’s the best friend you could ask for.
and does his heart drop to his ass when he hears the word friend? maybe. just a little.
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overleftdown · 4 months
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deranged post-canon farleigh speculation
so. archie madekwe said something that makes me question a lot of the other post-canon speculation (often quickstart dynamic post-canon fics, speculation, etc.). Basically, he was talking about how tired Farleigh was getting, in the point in time that the movie is set. This is depicted through his confrontation with Felix, which Archie confirmed was the first conversation Farleigh has had with the cattons about the issue of bias.
a review by hilton als briefly touched on farleigh's possible future, as well. it was a very negative and... honestly understandable idea of what farleigh would grow up to become. aka, someone who exploited and tokenized their race for "brownie points," pun not intended. i see a lot of people crafting stories of farleigh finding different ways to rejoin the ultra-rich class. and i kinda wanna say that i... don't like that. here's an anecdote: my cousin and i had a conversation about his experience moving from a white-dominated, suburban environment. he argues that although racism is still prevalent where he now lives, the racism he experienced in his hometown was so painfully, covertly delivered. it's this sort of "could you just call me a slur or something" mentality.
although farleigh is terrified of change, although farleigh is terrified of losing what he believes is an accommodation for his marginalization (it isn't; you can't buy your way out of racism), although farleigh learned to be materialistic through the ways in which he was raised, although farleigh is constantly running away from something--i think he was reaching a point of genuine hatred for the ways in which racism is delivered to him in this environment. i would also go insane. so freakishly insane. i think his conversation with felix made him understand that maybe the cattons will never even try to change. that the cattons couldn't even acknowledge the problem in the first place. that you can't really win, with people like the cattons. it's always a game of when, and never if. when will they finally, politely discard me?
this leaves a couple options. the first, farleigh learns to be financially independent and very much successful. he would never rely on other people again, especially not white people. this leaves room for hilton als' interpretation, but the fact that farleigh was cognizant of and willing to mention racial bias to felix is evidence for me to assume that farleigh is beyond belittling himself like that. farleigh already experienced so much shame from catering towards the cattons and their whiteness... i don't think he'd keep going with that. not with the way it ended. not after he had the horrible wake-up call that was both his cousins dying. so, maybe farleigh does find his way back to wealth. maybe through fashion, through modeling like his mother, through another form of art, through business, whatever.
the other option is that farleigh just... doesn't acquire that level or even close to that level of wealth again. i kinda like this idea. i kinda like imagining farleigh in a city flat or smaller suburban house, finding a significant other and probably never ever having kids. that, of course, still leaves room for farleigh to go and brutalize oliver out of saltburn. but i'd like to think he wouldn't take saltburn back. as i've said before, farleigh was never greedy. he never wanted to replace or succeed the cattons, nor did he want any form of dominance over them. to be their equal, yes. to be seen and heard and given attention, yes. but never did he play his games to knock felix or venetia down. i feel like farleigh would be the "eat the rich" that saltburn didn't have. not in the corny way, because farleigh is no robin hood, nor is he an innocent and selfless person.
my ideal "sequel" type situation would be farleigh returning to saltburn after living comfortably and humbly for the last 20 years. he's not here out of moral obligation. he's not here to steal back the catton wealth. he's here selfishly, and out of burning hatred. he's here because oliver stole any sense of closure farleigh could've ever had. he's here because oliver never gave farleigh the opportunity to forgive his family, nor to mourn them, nor to visit those memories, nor to make new ones. farleigh is here to wreck oliver's shit. it's not healthy, it's not pretty, it's not clean. i'd imagine 40-year-old farleigh, having matured, returning to saltburn and regressing to the same games he always used to play. lying, people pleasing, pretending, sex, drugs, sass, etc. ahhh. my ideal sequel. a man who found peace without closure and finds closure through a significant lack of peace. and, also, oliver dead as hell.
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fatuismooches · 7 months
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Man I adore tormenting dottore as my love language :3
cw: kinda dark? zandik accidentally hurting us because he's hallucinating (IM NOT AN EXPERT I just think it's like. Very realistic if this were to happen)
Anyways, I like to think that Dottore came from a... Rather unpleasant home, and then especially burned his home town along with everyone who has cursed him (except for you ofc)
Still, the memories hasn't left him. It's not like he could, no matter how much he buries himself in his research. Zandik can't heal when he pretends that it's all fine and that dwelling into such emotions would be a waste of time. This proved to be more prominent during his younger days...
One day, I could just imagine, you come home to your shared dorm, all preppy and smiles because you're finally gonna spend time with the love of your life! Only to see absolute ruin of your dorm—everything was a mess, papers strewn every where, couch flipped, drops of his blood on the floor. You panic, wondering if the Matra finally raided your home to arrest Zandik, then you heard him yell—in your bedroom. You run towards it, frantically, and stupidly.
You should've assessed the situation more. Took a deep breath and calmed your mind—but you were striken with anxiety and fear, and when you shouted "what happened here!?" "What did you do!?" at him, you were quickly met with pain you've never felt before.
He had burned you with a torch, and now you're on the ground, writhing and screaming in hellish pain, cradling the parts of your body that was burnt to a crisp. You see him grinning at you, eyes full of satisfaction and malice.
You thought that this was what he wanted all along, that everything was a lie and he just used you for all your worth, and now that he has nothing to use you for, he has decided to kill you.
But you then hear him shout: "Are you proud of me? I've become the monster you've always told me that I am."
Quickly, you realize that he hadn't meant to hurt you.
The scars stayed, much to Zandik's dismay. After treating your injuries, he has resorted to ignoring you for the next couple of days, being mean and insulting you.
Just be patient with him, you know that he cares. And that he's absolutely crushed that he has hurt you, of all people. He didn't mean it, but now you've got painful scars that will ache for a life time, all because of him. All because he was stubborn to heed your concerns. He wanted to burn the past, he really did. To forget and move on. He hated his childhood so much that he's willing to just let it burn into ashes... But he didn't realize if he tried, he'd burn you along with it.
You see him open his mouth whenever he tends your healing wounds, but then close it, biting his bottom lip to keep it from trembling. You see him read books all about treating burn wounds, cook you meals, ignoring his research all for you—his hands shook, eyes dark though glassy. You know he wants to apologize, but then his eyes goes to your scars, sucks in a deep breath, glares at you and walks away.
He's really doing his best to push you away
Zandik cares so much that he wants you to leave him, hate him, for being who he is, for being what he is. But no, you're smiling so softly and reassuring him that you're fine. That it's not his fault, that he didn't mean it.
And he'd yell he did mean it, that you were just lucky to survive (as if he hasn't lost sleep and progress on his research just to tend to you).
It wasn't his fault, you urged.
You remember it all vividly. Zandik knocking frantically at your home, houses ablaze behind him, his body littered with cuts and bruises. People were carrying torches and pitchforks, makeshift weapons and screaming at Zandik to just leave—and with out much thought, you grabbed as much as you could from your room and ran away with him.
You knew he finally snapped that day. Took matters in his own hands... He never talked much about it, but you could assume what happened. And you were certain he had confronted his parents before it all went to shit.
He wasn't trying to hurt you. He never did, and he would never want to hurt you. You were the exception and will always be, he would rather let the world cave in than letting you bleed by his hands. Zandik was lost in his thoughts, drowning in unpleasant memories and his eyes deceived him—he thought you were someone else, and he wanted to hurt them, not you.
JGJGOFHFJDSJS yeah that, he most definitely probably cry in your arms talking about how much he hates ur scars bc he gave them to you...
I would add more BUT IM LITERALLY IN CLASS AND MY PROFESSOR IS LECTURING HELP OKAY BYE SMOOCHES ILY /P HAVE A GOOD DAY CKCBXKCBDJ
Sorry for this I just like. Exploring struggles and menta shit KBcjcjc
MOOT WHAT IS THIS... WHY ARE YOU HURTING US LIKE THIS my JAW WAS DROPPED THE WHOLE TIME ���😭 Okay but real. I have two hcs when it comes to Zandik's parents - they were the only ones who loved him but they died when he was really young, or they really just hated him. I've also heard others say "Zandik" can be used as an insult too? I don't know how true that is though. But yeah I think the latter is more likely to be true unfortunately 💔 Even if they were nice to him it wouldn't be enough to counter a whole town's worth of hatred towards him... yup yup the village definitely got burned down to the ground.
One would think that he wouldn't be affected. But he wasn't Dottore yet. He was merely Zandik at this point. He couldn't just shrug it off and go about his day. He pondered. He thought. He felt. He was still more human, more feeling than he wanted to admit, and he absolutely hated it. Still, he didn't regret it, but the memories would simply not leave his head. It was wholly bothersome. After all, not too long ago he was merely a little boy... a little boy who was deemed a monster, a demon child. All the people, even his own parents who accused him were gone now yet... their voices still rang clear in his head. And of course you had no clue, because Zandik would never speak about his feelings under any circumstance.
OUCHHHH HOW CAN I EVEN WRITE THE NEXT PART?? I CAN'T WRITE IT AS GOOD AS YOU oh gosh I WILL TRY. Ah... coming home to your shared dorm. Thinking it's going to be another regular, good day with you and your lover. But it's not, and when you see your home ransacked of course the first thing that goes through your mind is if your Zandik is okay. Of course you you rush to him and beckon him to tell you what happened as anyone would do. Of course you try to reach out to him. And of course, you didn't expect to be licked with flames by your lover's own hand, not only is your body crying out in pain but so is your heart - did Zandik really not care for you after all of these years? The only one who you treasured above all else... perhaps he never viewed you more than a pawn. But then you hear those few words that make you realize what's truly going on - ah, you understand now.
The logical part of Zandik knew that the scars would remain, but the illogical part of him hoped (to think he was even capable of that) badly that they wouldn't. You wonder what his expression was when he was tending to your wounds - you were asleep at the time - but even if you had seen it you probably wouldn't be able to put it into words... it was expressionless yet also not at the same time. He looked empty, and unfeeling, yet he looked the opposite too. And perhaps you wouldn't believe how tenderly he treated your wounds, from the way he's giving you the cold shoulder now. You wouldn't know the way his hands shook the whole time because he did that to you. The one person who would never, who should have never faced his anger, his wrath. It's all his fault, there's no denying that, he hurt you and now you're going to be hurting for the rest of your life too. The last person, no the only person who he doesn't want to see hurt.
Even now, Zandik doesn't understand you. How the fuck are you more calm about this than he is. He hurt you. He burnt you and he meant it and yet in the aftermath, there's not a hint of resentment on your face and he doesn't understand - he hates it so much, you should hate him, in fact it'd make him feel better if you did because how can you even begin to like him a tiny bit after what he's just done, he's claimed to love you and even in that twisted mind of his he knows that's not what lovers do. He doesn't understand why you haven't packed your bags and moved to another dorm by now, hell why do you try to usher him to bed because "lack of sleep is bad for him" what actually goes through your mind...? What went through your mind when you decided to leave with him too? The villagers weren't after you, just him, you could have had a normal life, but you still decided to go with him... you two had no plan, no money, no real necessities but you gave up everything for him anyway. Sigh...
Ouch... i feel like at some point you would just accept your scars but Zandik? Haunts him more than he wants to admit. Don't get me wrong he still thinks you're beautiful but... you know what I mean. Mhm... imagine the child segment asking you where/how you got the scars from and at the moment you make up the most ridiculous lie because that's all your brain can think of because there's no way you're telling the baby that Prime did it. Oh and the angst if Dottore hears that convo :(
Okay... moving on from that angst... PLS You're hella brave for being on tumblr in class, I'm too scared to open it or write fics in general in fear of someone seeing 😭 Once I accidentally opened my blog on my laptop and I closed the tab at LIGHT SPEED. ILY TOO KAI I HOPE YOU'RE DOING WELL!! ❤️❤️❤️
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tomatoswup · 1 year
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summary: the when's and development of your feelings for a certain typhoon.
warnings: angst? more bittersweet really
A/N: honestly, this was a quick drabble after finishing notes for class :D since it was just a quick idea, i didn't really develop into a whole backstory and stuff without getting ahead of myself lmao but angst? yes(my first attempt) also was listening to tame impala's "For the First Time" as I wrote this so that kinda explains alot, enjoy!
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When you first started gaining feelings for Vash, it was a night filled with thought and contemplation from your own head. Was this right? He was your best friend for god sake! No, you can't like him. It's not that you didn't want to, you couldn't. Your mind told you to hold back, to stop whatever was developing in you about the typhoon. And as much as you didn't want to accept it, you were in denial. The pair of you have traveled together for so long but you never got tired of the mischievous glint in his eyes, and the toothy smile he would shoot at you. You found it..cute.
In your own words, Vash was too considerate for a world that put their back to him, and you found it admirable.
You clenched the jacket you wore tightly as the snores of your caravan filled the night behind a large rock you sat behind. Maybe you needed the priest to pray for you...
When you started accepting your feelings for him, it felt as if your stomach constantly hurt every time you'd stand too near to him. And honestly, Vash had been the first crush you've had in a real long time and that flustered you a bit more. Whenever he'd put his hands on your shoulders, the familiar sensation of electricity ran up your back to which he'd curiously ask why your face had flushed red. Were you sick? He recommended a day off from working around with Wolfwood. Of course he did. when he walked away, you couldn't help but quickly cover your face with your hands.
When you noticed the difference, it kind of...hurt. The fact that he had become more affectionate with Meryl, seeking to find her side and accompany her more than he had with you. Was that a hand-hold? You felt a minor tinge in your heart. But that was okay! You guys were still best friends! Why were you feeling some type of way about it? You should be supporting him! You try to shrug the thought off and continue walking behind them as that little toothy smile you loved and had thought was reserved for just you, was given to another. You smiled on to the both of them, ignoring the growing ache in your chest.
When Wolfwood finally noticed the change in your behavior whenever you gazed at the pair, you had already fallen deep into the heavy pressure that resided in your heart. You didn't want to stop Vash from going after Meryl. What kind of person would you be if you did? Wolfwood confronts you as you had temporarily stepped away one night as everyone took camp in the dry deserts of No Man's Land. And as the more questions Wolfwood asked you, the more your throat felt as if it wanted to burn. And it wasn't until he asked a singular question, that you broke. You sobbed as the ache in your chest got unbearable and so heavy your stomach dropped to the floor and the familiar feeling of wanting to throw up arose. Wolfwood sighs and takes a seat next to you, rubbing your back as you leaned onto him for support.
"Is it needle-noggin and Meryl?"
When Vash and Meryl got officially together and Vash had come to break the news to you, you couldn't help but give him a pained smile, not even attempting to speak in fear of a tear falling out. and he asks what's wrong? Were you feeling okay? Did you need help? And he gives you that same toothy-nervous grin when you shake your head in fake reassurance.
oh how you missed that smile.
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wisteriasymphony · 1 month
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guys i'm sorry but one of these days i will write ladybug literally ripping out chat noir's teeth and i think people will like it in the same breath as they do those adorable rosekasa ladynoir prompts and maybe even you dear reader will be one of them
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calkestisstupidhours · 3 months
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I love Cal!
*puts him through The Horrors*
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angelicxdisaster · 2 months
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Goodbye Letter
BSD SEASON 2 SPOILERS
this is the first chapter of the bsd fic! the working title is "I can still smell the fire (though I know It's long died out)". Yes, it's a Mitski lyric, I love her. This is Oda's letter to the OC before his fight with Gide.
CW: angst, mentions of death and killing, i don't think there's anything else tho
enjoy!
Kanako, 
If you are reading this, then I am probably dead. Pops and the kids are, too. Mimic got to them, and now they’ve gotten to me, as well. I know where the leader of Mimic is going; I’m going to find him and kill him. In other circumstances, if the mafia wanted him dead, you would get the job, but not even you would stand a chance against him. He and I share the same ability, and I fear he would still defeat you with even one of his senses gone. At first, I didn’t want to be the one who killed him, but I saw those kids die right before my eyes, and I couldn’t go on living without bringing them some sort of justice. 
I’m sorry to leave without telling you. Hopefully, this letter will find you after Gide is dead, so he won’t be after you, either. I must say to you, this is not how I pictured I would die, but at least I’ll go out in a somewhat interesting way. I always wanted to die a boring death, but going out like this doesn’t actually seem so bad; maybe this way will make my memory last longer. 
I have to ask you a few favors, though. I know you are going to read that and scoff at the idea that even in death, I’d be nagging you, but it’s the last time, I promise. Leave it behind. Live an ordinary life. I know it’s not fair of me to ask, but I don’t want to die with one more regret other than not being able to say goodbye to you in person; and dying without knowing you’re living a good life, well, I would consider my life a failure. 
And the other thing: don’t be afraid to use your cane. It doesn’t make you weak; I don’t even know if you can be weak. You and your brother are the strongest people I know, but you get lost in your loneliness while he finds solace in it. I might have been able to reach you, but only you can pull Dazai out before he drowns in his own mind. 
I’m sorry to leave you like this. I hope you can forgive me. But know that even though it may look like I have left easily, this is the fourth time I’ve tried to write this letter. The first time I didn’t even know what to write, and even finishing the fourth one, I still don’t know if I’ve said everything I want to. The other letters were too messy and covered in tears to be legible. This one may still have a few blots on it, but hopefully, you are still able to read it. 
I love you,
Oda
Of course, I forgive you. 
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sunshinediaz · 7 months
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fuck it friday 🫧
hi friends, mwah
i was tagged by @jesuisici33, @exhuastedpigeon, @callmenewbie, @fortheloveofbuddie, @wikiangela, @giddyupbuck, @thewolvesof1998, and @daffi-990 i adore all of you sm
please enjoy a lil piece of my new bad things fic that i hope to have finished by monday? ♥️
“You’re helpless,” he says, but it’s affectionate, dripping with honey-like adoration that makes the blood in his veins all sticky. “You know that?”  “Yeah.” Buck grins, big and goofy and a little buck-toothed. “That’s what I have you for.”  “And what if I’m not there?”  Buck reaches out, tugs on a loop in Eddie’s pants, and says, “I’m not letting you get that far away from me, cowboy,” and if they weren’t in the middle of nowhere, surrounded by poison ivy and an elusive black bear cub and the rest of their team, Eddie thinks he might kiss him right there.  Except, well. They’re not together, not really, and as much Eddie wants it, as much as he thinks Buck wants it, too, and that he’ll welcome a kiss, any kind, he’s not in the game of gambling his heart right now.  Eddie chuckles. “You’re silly,” he says, fond like the sky is blue and the grass is green and he can breathe without thinking about it, kind of like how he can love Buck without thought, easy as that, simple as anything, and finishes adjusting Buck’s vest. “Purrito.”  “Woof,” Buck whispers, cackling, and Eddie snorts, shoves him away because he can’t very well pull him close.
tagging @callaplums, @eddiebabygirldiaz, @eddiediaztho, @honestlydarkprincess, @try-set-me-on-fire, @mysteriouslyyounggalaxy, and whoever else wants to share something!
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sage-nebula · 2 years
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STH - Had My Ducks in a Row, Now They're Slowly Falling Out of Line
Notes: I had intended to work on Beyond Oblivion tonight, but ever since I made that post about Metal Sonic calling Tails an unworthy child the other night (and then also made a post about Tangle being a good big sis), I've been thinking about this . . . and so this ended up coming out instead. Originally it was meant to be just Tails and Tangle, but as I finished up their section Sonic's came to mind, so I couldn't resist adding that in too.
Credit for the idea that Sonic has a little unease about Tails making so many weapons goes to @chaoxfix, because that headcanon is just too perfect to pass up. Hope you don't mind that I borrowed it!
Also, this is my first time ever writing for Tangle, so I hope she sounds all right, because I love her to pieces.
Summary: Months and months ago, Neo Metal Overlord called Tails unworthy. And he knows it's stupid to keep thinking about it, but it's been living rent-free in his head ever since. [Post-Chao Races & Badnik Bases, pre-Trial By Fire]
- - -
Tails scowled at the schematic spread over his work bench, and pressed his pencil lead a little harder into the paper.
Unworthy child!
His pencil lead snapped, the crack echoing with the words in his head, and he let his forehead hit his workbench with a groan.
It had been months since that day—months since the battle of Angel Island, though after the Metal Virus pandemic it felt as though it had been so much longer. But it really hadn’t been; everything happened so quickly nowadays, one crisis right after another, that there were times when Tails felt out of breath even when he was standing still. It wasn’t all bad; he genuinely liked adventure, especially when he could help Sonic save the world. But that was the problem, wasn’t it?
He chewed the inside of his cheek, and squeezed his eyes shut.
He had helped, during the battle of Angel Island. No matter what Neo Metal Overlord said, he had helped. He crashed the ship straight into Metal Overlord—he took him down! Sonic was so proud of him. Tails couldn’t say he wanted to do it again (in fact he’d say the opposite since he’d ached for days after that, not that he’d admit it), but he would say, would insist against the nagging voice in his head, that he had helped that time. He’d helped save Angel Island, and the world.
But . . .
But then the Metal Virus pandemic happened. Sonic got infected, and Tails couldn’t help him. Oh sure, he’d come close to working out a cure. But one set of infected Chao had been all it took to sabotage his data and make him lose everything. And though he had managed to retrieve one of the Chaos Emeralds from Zomom with Amy’s help, not only had he not been the one to come up with the idea to begin with, but at the end, all he’d been able to do was cower and hope against hope that Sonic would pull through and save the day. Sonic, who had been fighting off the infection for the duration of the pandemic. Sonic, who was already at the limits of his exhaustion. Everything had fallen to him, again, and Tails had been able to do nothing to help except retrieve one lousy Emerald.
(Well, that wasn’t fair. The Emerald wasn’t lousy. The Emerald helped Sonic achieve Super form, which allowed him and Silver and Metal to save the day. That was more than Tails could say for himself.)
Sonic hadn’t held it against him, of course. Sonic never did. When Tails was too scared of lightning to pilot through a storm, or revealed that a Chaos Emerald was fake and got Sonic ejected into space in a soon-to-be exploded capsule—no matter the situation, Sonic never blamed him. For all his spiky quills, bravado and the way he could snark at their enemies, Tails knew the truth: Sonic was a softie, and way nicer than most anyone gave him credit for.
Tails lifted his head so he could fold his arms on his desk, his chin resting upon them. He laid his pencil in front of him, and gave it a light flick so it rolled up the desk, and then back down to his waiting finger. Another flick sent it rolling up again.
It wasn’t like Tails had accomplished nothing in the interim. He had found schematics to fix Omega . . . even though he couldn’t read them. And Sonic had trusted him to go raid an old Eggman base to try to find the cipher he needed so that he could read them, and that was where they found Belle. And later, when they went to help Amy and the others at White Park . . . well, Tails had gotten kidnapped by Starline and tied to a rollercoaster to emotionally blackmail Sonic. But Rouge had, too, although she’d managed to cut her ropes and free herself faster than he did. But that was all right, wasn’t it? Because then he’d helped her alert the others so they could evacuate the tourists. And though Starline had tried to grab him again, this time Tails managed to protect himself . . . through using Belle’s kicking reflex, albeit without her permission to do so.
Unworthy child!
Tails huffed a sharp sigh to try to dislodge the twist in his gut, and flicked his pencil hard enough that it zipped off the back of his workbench and tumbled down to the floor.
“Whoa, buddy! Is this a bad time?”
“Huh?” Tails sat up and twisted around in his seat, blinking in surprise as he caught sight of Tangle in the doorway of his workshop, her fingers gripping the top of the doorframe as she swung lightly inside. “Oh—no. Do you need something?”
“Nah, not really. I was just kinda bored, and in the area, so I thought I’d drop in.” As she spoke, Tangle skipped over and hopped onto a stool beside Tails’ workbench. It spun halfway around, but she caught herself on the side of the desk, and swung back around to face him. “What’cha got goin’ on?”
“Nothing much.” Tails glanced back at the schematic he’d been working on, a half-finished design for a new rocket launcher. There was no need for it, really, but there wasn’t not a need for it, either. That’s what Tails told himself, anyway, or told Sonic whenever Sonic questioned him about why he was building so many different weapons. Maybe they didn’t need rocket launchers right now, but who was to say what would come in the future? There was no telling when Eggman or Starline or whoever would attack again. It was better to have it and not need it, than need it and not have it.
Unworthy—!
“Helloooo?” Tangle waved her hand in front of his face, and Tails jumped a little, blinking as he refocused on her. “Everything okay in there? You seem a million miles away, little dude.”
“Oh—yeah! I’m okay,” Tails said, and he forced a bright smile. Tangle smiled back, but not all the way; her forehead was creased, her brows pinched in the middle. “Sorry, I was just . . . thinking.”
“About what?” Tangle asked. When he didn’t answer right away (he was never good at coming up with lies on the spot), she nudged her calf against his shoe, and gave him a cajoling smile. “C’mooon, tell me! We saved the world together, right? A couple different times! You can tell me things. I promise I’ll only beg to try out whatever cool new invention you have up your sleeve a total of three times if you tell me about it.”
Tails couldn’t help it; he cracked a smile, despite himself. “It’s not that. I—the rocket launcher’s not coming along as hot as I’d like. It’s nowhere near testing stages yet.”
Tangle’s eyes lit up. “Rocket launcher?”
Tails cast a glance askance at the schematic. Solar power was the way to go, he thought; there was an endless source of energy right there in the sky, just waiting to be used. But none of the batteries he’d built could build up a charge quickly enough, or hold enough of a charge for long enough, to be used in something like a rocket launcher. He’d been working on solar power batteries since even before Metal Sonic’s coordinated badnik attacks, and yet—
Unworthy . . . !
“Do you ever—” Tails began, then stopped. This was stupid. It was stupid to still be thinking like this. If he told Sonic—
Sonic wouldn’t say it was stupid. Sonic would never say something like that. He’s too—he’s not mean enough for that. Even if he thought it, he’d never say it.
“Do I what?” Tangle kicked her feet back against the leg of her stool, and when Tails said nothing, she swung her tail around to poke him in the head. “C’mon, don’t leave me hangin’. Finish what you were gonna say, I’m all ears.”
Tails ran a hand across the back of his hair, smoothing down the fur Tangle’s tail had tousled. “It’s nothing. It’s stupid.”
“Stupid? From you? Mr Kid Genius? I highly doubt that.” Tangle put her elbow on his workbench, and leaned her cheek into her palm. “Come on, just tell me! Whatever it is, I promise I won’t tell a soul. Cool tail buddies honor.”
It was stupid. There was no way to explain that he was letting something Neo Metal Overlord said rot in his head for months without sounding stupid. But the thing about Tangle—the thing Tails liked about Tangle—was that she was unapologetically sincere. She wasn’t afraid to be enthusiastic about things, or embarrassed even when she was clumsy and made mistakes. She said they were cool tail buddies, but Tangle herself wasn’t concerned with being cool. With being a hero, sure. But not with being cool. And she was best friends with someone who was just as much of a nerd as Tails himself was, albeit about different things. It didn’t matter that Jewel’s wardrobe consisted of nothing but pantsuits and that she unironically loved organizing. Tangle still thought she was one of the coolest people in the world.
So maybe, even though what he thought was stupid, it would be okay if he told Tangle. Maybe she wouldn’t think he was any less cool himself. And she probably meant it when she said she wouldn’t tell anyone; he hadn’t known her to ever lie before.
“Okay,” Tails said at length, and Tangle’s eyes lit up. “But I’m going to hold you to that. If you tell anyone, you’re out of the cool tail buddies club.”
Tangle put two fingers to her forehead, and popped them off in a salute. “Yessir! So, what’s got your tails all twisted? In the bad way, I mean.”
“It’s just . . .” He’d resolved to tell her, but even now, the words felt stuck in his throat. Tails wished he hadn’t flicked his pencil off the desk; he needed something to fidget with. He took a deep breath. “Do you ever wonder if—if maybe you’re . . . if despite anything, you’re just—holding people back? Or not . . . contributing what you should be?”
Tangle blinked, and sat up straight on the stool. “What?”
“I mean—” Tails swung one of his own tails up so he could fidget with the tip; he couldn’t look her in the eyes anymore. “You do your best. And you do contribute some things. But it’s—when it matters, when it really counts, you just . . . fall short. You have to rely on someone else for help, to save the day. And you—no one’s mad about it, and they’d never say it, and you do some things so you know you’re not totally useless, but you wonder if, if maybe . . .”
“If, maybe . . . you made one mistake too many?” Tangle offered, and Tails’ ears flattened against his head, his shoulders hunched as he cringed. “If maybe at first it could be passed off as you just being inexperienced, and not really knowing what you were up against, and so you underestimated the enemy and he got the jump on you because of that. But then later, after you knew better and could be trusted, you still got careless and your zombified best friend got the jump on you and turned you into a zombot, and so she realized she really couldn’t rely on you after all. And so the real reason she left you behind wasn’t because you were working with the Restoration and she felt that your place was with them, but was actually because she felt she couldn’t count on you as her backup anymore because you’d already let her down once, so who’s to say it won’t happen again? And you can’t even fault her for that, because you did let her down once and, anyway, if she wanted you along she would have let you go with her, but she didn’t and that means that if you go after her now, you’re disrespecting what she wants and are just going to get told to go home again because she doesn’t want and can’t count on you at all.”
Tails furrowed his brow halfway through Tangle’s speech, and by the time she was finished, confusion clouded his anxiety so thoroughly he could hardly feel it anymore. “Huh?”
Tangle blinked; for a moment, it looked as though she’d almost forgotten he was there. Then she laughed loudly, and waved a hand through the air as if dispelling smoke from burned cookies. “Just as, you know, a totally random and totally not specific or in any way real scenario.”
Tails frowned. “Right . . .”
“But, anyway. My totally random and not specific or in any way real example aside—am I hearing you right? You think you’re not contributing enough? You?” Tangle reached over with her tail again, and this time gave him a light push on his shoulder. “Have you seen all the stuff you’ve built? You’ve got two whole workshops filled, plus all that stuff at Restoration HQ. You’ve got a crazy amount of inventions! And you’ve saved the world, several times! And you’re only eight! You know what I was doing when I was eight? I was parkouring off cliffs, and not even on purpose. Jewel didn’t get those guns of hers by hauling rocks around her museum, let me tell you. She got them from hauling my sorry butt back up from the cliff I threw myself down for the third time in a week.”
Tails chuckled. “Yeah. But—”
“But nothing.” Tangle flopped her tail on top of Tails’ head, and he brushed it away. “You are hands down the coolest eight-year-old I’ve ever seen in my life. So what if you need help sometimes? Everyone does, and you should know; you help people all the time. So why’s it bad for you to get helped back, huh?”
“It’s not bad. I just . . .” Tails flailed a hand, gesturing to nothing. “I’ve been doing this for a long time now. I just feel like maybe I should be . . . better, by now.”
“Well . . .” Tangle tilted her head side to side, considering. “That’s not a . . . bad thing, maybe. I mean, don’t get me wrong, you’re totally awesome and should have way more confidence in yourself. But if you were totally satisfied, then you couldn’t get even better, right? You’d stop trying. And there’s no way this world would be able to handle it if you stopped trying, so that would be no good.”
Tails gave her a wry smile. “The world would be fine. I mean, there’s Sonic—”
“Sonic can’t invent the things you do,” Tangle said. Her tail poked him in the chest. “Don’t get me wrong, he’s amazing and a hero and we’d all be doomed a thousand times over without him, and if I get to go on another adventure with him tomorrow I’ll have waited too long—but he’s no scientific genius, y’know? But you are, and you’re cool and nice and not evil or bonkers like Eggman or Starline. So we definitely need you in our corner.”
Warmth flooded Tails’ cheeks, and he looked away as he rubbed the back of his neck. “Thanks, Tangle.”
“Don’t mention it, li’l dude. What are cool tail buddies for?” Tangle winked, and Tails felt his smile grow. “So, what’cha workin’ on? You said something about a rocket launcher? Please tell me you have a rocket launcher.”
“Not yet,” Tails said, and Tangle’s shoulders slumped in exaggerated disappointment. “But I have been working on a few other things, like a new set of prototype missile gauntlets.”
Tangle sat straight up in her chair, eyes shining. “Missile gauntlets?”
“Yeah—well, I was thinking about Knuckles, you know? He’s a brawler, so he specializes in close-quarters combat. But Eggman knows that, so if he sent badniks to Angel Island, they’d probably be ones that are built for long-range combat.”
As he spoke, Tails hopped off his stool and crossed the room to the workbench along the back wall, where the prototype gauntlets—having just had the finishing touches put on them the night before—sat. Tangle followed close at his heels, her eyes the size of dinner plates.
“So just in case he gets attacked by long-range badniks and we’re not near enough to help, I figured these might be able to give him an extra boost. They can function like normal gauntlets in close-range combat, but if he presses this button here by curling his wrist—” Tails indicated a button on the inside cuff, “—then it’ll deploy missiles from the knuckles of the gauntlet, here.” He tapped his fingers along small, barely visible missile compartment doors along each of the four knuckles. “Of course, right now each gauntlet only holds four missiles, so it’s not exactly practical for a long fight, and I haven’t figured out how best to reload them, especially since Knuckles isn’t exactly the greatest with technology, but—”
“Those. Are so. Cool!” Tangle squealed, and Tails jumped yet again, his tails spinning this time to keep him a few inches off the ground until his heart rate slowed. “Can I see them in action? Can I try them out?! Please, please can I try them out?!”
“Well, I made them for Knuckles, so they’re a bit big, but . . .” Tails eyed Tangle’s clasped hands, and then her pleading eyes and wobbling lower lip. He grinned. “Gimme ten minute to adjust the size, and then we can go out to the target range out back.”
Tangle let out another delighted squeal, and scooped him up in a bear hug. For the second time in under five minutes, Tails felt his feet leave the ground. “Woohoo! You’re the best, Tails!”
Tails laughed as she set him back on his feet, his own tails swishing behind him. “Heheh, well . . . I try.”
- - -
It wasn’t too uncommon for there to be reports of explosions in the general vicinity of Tails’ Mystic Ruins workshop. Tails was a super genius, but he was a super genius who often worked with explosive materials and way too much electrical charge, and so every now and then, things were bound to get a little explode-y. So when there was talk of an occasional kaboom heard in the Mystic Ruins, Sonic didn’t usually get too worried.
But sometimes it wasn’t just one kaboom. Sometimes it was multiple kabooms. And when those multiple kabooms were accompanied by talks of missiles and rockets and lots of yelling . . . that’s when Sonic’s quills got set on edge.
It wasn’t in his nature to panic right away. Multiple kabooms, rockets, and yelling didn’t necessarily mean that Eggman had decided to strike again, targeting Tails’ workshop directly this time. But when Sonic tried calling and got voicemail—well, that still didn’t necessarily mean Tails was in danger. Maybe he was just caught up in whatever he was working on, and didn’t hear his communicator beep. So Sonic tried again, and once more, got voicemail. And when he tried a third time . . .
Well, he didn’t try a third time. Kabooms, missiles, yelling, voicemail. All four things combined meant it was time to pay the Mystic Ruins workshop a visit.
Fortunately, he wasn’t too far away. He made it to Tails’ home in record time, picking up the pace when he caught sight of the wispy spirals of smoke rising in the sky from Mystic Ruins’ border. As he wound his way through the Ruins, he spied no badniks—but then, that was probably intentional. Ol’ Egghead was probably laying a trap. Not a very good one, considering how fast word spread that something was going down in Mystic Ruins, and how obvious the smoke was visible against the sky, but—
Another explosion rent the air, and rocked the earth enough so that Sonic stumbled as he reached Tails’ front door. Immediately following, he heard a whoop of delighted laughter from behind the workshop.
He blinked, and stood up straight. Was that . . . Tangle?
Seeing as how nothing seemed to be happening inside the lab, Sonic looped around to the back, where Tails’ outdoor testing area and target range was. Upon reaching the back, three things immediately became clear:
One: His ID of the voice he heard was correct; Tangle was indeed in what remained of Tails’ backyard.
Two: Tails was just fine, and not under attack at all. He had his tablet in hand, and was surveying the wreckage with a grin from his vantage point up in the air.
And three: Rebuilding the testing area was not going to be fun.
To say it was in ruins was an understatement. Every single target, from the ones that had been pinned to the trees, to the stationary standees, to the ones that Tails had built into moving tracks in the ground, had been blasted apart in some form or another. There were little embers smoldering in the grass in different parts of the yard. Several trees had been knocked over. A pair of rickies were staring at the carnage with horrified awe from the roof of Tails’ workshop.
Tangle spotted Sonic as he rounded the corner, and while she had already been sporting a manic grin, her smile somehow grew even wider as her hand shot into the air and she waved at him. “Hey Sonic! What’s up?!”
“Seems like that’s what I should be asking you,” Sonic said, as Tails swooped down to land beside him. Sonic raised an eyebrow as he glanced over at Tails. “Some people were saying they heard explosions out this way, so I figured I’d swing by to take a look. Everything okay?”
“Yeah! Tangle’s just helping me test some new gear,” Tails said, as Tangle zipped over to them at speeds Sonic didn’t know she was capable of. She still wasn’t on his level, of course, but he did have to step out of the way as she blazed by, a trail of fire sparking on the grass behind her.
“Rocket boots,” Tangle said, before Sonic had a chance to ask. Her eyes were shining brighter than a pair of suns, and she pumped her fists in front of her. “He made rocket boots!”
Sonic laughed. “No kidding?”
“They’re for Shadow,” Tails explained, and he held out his tablet so Sonic could glance over the schematics on the screen. “I know his are still in okay shape, but that doesn’t mean they can’t be better. And I’ve added extra propulsion to these ones to add more force to his kicks. You know, since he likes to kick people.”
“He does like doing that,” Sonic agreed.
“I mean, who knows when we’ll see him again. But if something does happen, I figure it might be nice to give him a boost. You know, as thanks for helping us out. I’m thinking about making some for his Chao, too, so it can keep up with him.”
“Not sure he wants to be bringing that little guy into battle. Though you never know, maybe Cream and Cheese’ll inspire him.”
“Right? So it won’t hurt to be prepared, just in case.”
“Okay, as absolutely freaking adorable as the idea of Chao rocket boots sounds, I’m ready to try out the next thing,” Tangle said, already slipping out of the rocket boots she’d lit the grass on fire with. “You got anything else, little guy? Please tell me you have something else. You’ve gotta have something else.”
“Hmm . . .” Tails tapped his finger to his chin in thought, and then grinned. “You know, I did finish a prototype for a magnet gun last week. It works by using magnetism to attract and repel metal, theoretically turning anything used against us into possible ammunition to—”
“Is it in the same area of your workshop as the other things?” Tangle interrupted, eyes bright. Tails nodded, and Tangle pumped her fist into the air. “Heck yes! I’m on it!” With that, she turned and dashed back into the lab.
Sonic shook his head, smiling as he watched her go, and then looked back at Tails. Tails was already skimming through the schematics on his tablet again, no doubt searching for the magnet gun’s folder so he could make notes based on Tangle’s tests. Now that he knew the workshop wasn’t under attack, his quills settled back into a more relaxed position, his heartrate returning to its usual fast, but not supercharged. Tails was safe. He was having fun with Tangle. His yard was destroyed, but they could deal with that later. Sonic would help, and he would only be a little melodramatic about it.
But it seemed like everything they had tested so far was some kind of weapon. Even the boots for Shadow—didn’t Tails say something about adding more firepower to them, to help Shadow in combat? And a magnet gun, while it didn’t have ammunition of its own . . .
So much had happened so fast. Eggman had successfully taken over the world, and kept Sonic in captivity for six months, during which Tails was alone. Then not long after that, Metal Sonic had tried to take the Master Emerald, and the world with it. Then there was the Metal Virus pandemic, and the incident at White Park . . .
Sonic loosely crossed his arms, his head tilted as he examined Tails. Tails was still scanning through the blueprints on his tablet, his tongue poking out of the corner of his mouth.
He was such a smart, strong, brave kid. But he was also, well . . .
“Hey,” Sonic said, and Tails looked up, his ears perked in question. “You doing okay?”
“Huh?” Tails blinked, as though caught off-guard, and for a second—just a second, so quick Sonic almost missed it—it looked like something clouded his eyes. But then he smiled as the door to his workshop opened again, Tangle bounding back out into the yard. “Yeah, I’m fine. Why?”
Something was there. Sonic didn’t know what it was, but he did know he didn’t like it. Tails was so smart, and strong, and brave. But . . .
“No reason,” Sonic said. “Hey, doesn’t that new AGES game come out this weekend? How about we give it a spin?”
Tails grinned, and wagged his tails in a hard enough circle that he lifted a little off the grass. “Really? You want to?”
“Definitely,” Sonic said, and he grinned as Tails beamed, and did a delighted little loop in the air.
“All right, I’ve got the gun,” Tangle said, and Sonic took a step back as she hefted a heavy, dark blue-grey weapon in her hands. Once again, her smile was manic; it was not at all hard to believe that she had destroyed all the targets in the yard with glee. “Show me how to work this thing!”
“You got it!” Tails dropped back down to the grass, and leaned closer to Tangle as he started to give her a detailed run-down of the gun: the trigger mechanism, magnetism strength modification slider, the whole works. Sonic shook his head, and as Tangle nodded fervently along with Tails’ instructions, bounded up onto the roof to sit beside the rickies and watch the chaos that was about to unfold.
Tails was a smart, strong, and brave kid. But he also was still a kid. More specifically still, he was—and always would be, no matter how old they got—Sonic’s kid brother.
Tails indicated a hunk of scrap metal on the other side of the yard. Tangle took aim and fired. The magnet gun’s magnetic beam worked as intended; it secured the scrap metal in a vibrating grasp, and propelled it straight back at Tangle at alarming speed. Heeding Tails’ shouted warning, Tangle spun herself in several circles, swinging the scrap metal around her, before she released it and sent it flying. It crashed clear through a tree, and made a strong dent in the tree behind it. Tails, delighted, saved the video on his tablet as Tangle crowed in triumph.
No matter how much he wished he could, Sonic couldn’t stop the bad things from happening. And no matter what he said, he knew he couldn’t make Tails feel like he could slow down on making an armory big enough to outfit the entire world—at least, not for long. But whatever nightmares bugged Tails at night, or spurred him to develop new guns and rockets during the day . . . well, maybe Sonic couldn’t dispel them completely, but a chill weekend of video games and junk food definitely couldn’t hurt.
Tails retrieved the scrap metal and set it out so Tangle could give the magnet gun another go, and Sonic leaned back comfortably against the roof to watch the show.
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eggnoodles0up · 7 months
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its kinda interesting, i think with fanart i prefer the more fluffy and silly stuff, but with fanfiction/comics i tend to be more invested in the angsty ones
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bsaka7 · 1 year
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to sing or cry | charles/alex | 3.4k
Alex shows up one week with a bird book and the next with binoculars.
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yoon-kooks · 9 months
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2025 huh🥹
back when d-day was released and i listened to amygdala for the first time, i decided to take my writing in a different direction and tell a story that really mattered to me.
with the tour over and yoongi’s enlistment confirmed, itll be me writing that story endlessly so that when he comes back in 2025, i can also come back with something meaningful💖
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nerosdayinanime · 1 year
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Sanemi & Giyuu were about 16-17 when they both individually went on an undercover mission in the Kaze no Kuni capital city, they henged/disguised as fake personas Kazura (vaguely derived from kaze, wind) and Nakuu ('to lose')
Kazura is supposed to be darker skinned + two-toned eyes like that of Kazan no Kuni descendants & is sensible and confident but lazy, Nakuu has a hairstyle + facial shape from Mizu no Kuni & an outgoing enthusiastic and pretty sly personality
Giyuu put some particular effort into his disguise and really got into the character he was playing up, he also had fun with it where he could- and thats how he met Kazura. i dont have or really want specifics of why where how or such bc it ruins the imaginative bit of it ig? but while they were on the mission they were meeting up, they both knew the other was disguised but neither pried about it. they fell in love a bit, however it means, but as Nakuu's namesake they were never going to last. it was a mission and when it was done they would leave for home and never meet again.
but then they did :)
at 19 sanemi and giyuu had a political marriage arranged(forced) by Kyogo being a greedy fuck and wanting more trade from the Tomioka, in both the Happy & Broken marriage paths giyuu's the one who notices sanemi acting the same way as kazura in some ways and realizes the two are one in the same. In the Happy marriage its a thought that brings a smile to his face and a jest about how they fell in love twice, in the Broken marriage its only twice the heartbreak after the apathy sanemi regards him with and the loneliness that consumes him
#kny clan au#kny clan au: arranged sanegiyu(Fluff)#kny clan au: arranged sanegiyuu(Angst)#Kazura & Nakuu#i like hurting giyuu<3 but i also want to be nice & im indecisive so Multiverse type shit like this happens#im trying to proper Write out the story i have but my skill isnt up to par with my vision. i'll post it anyway when im done tho bc i want t#Share the story and talk & think more about it bc its Fun#the idea for this actually came earlier before i thought of the arranged marriage bit- its the sngy mission meeting thing but changed#slightly with the timeline of the marriage(19) & sanemi murking kyogo(21)#in the orig they were older & i also didnt have the idea of major civilian cities/villages for the shinobi to do stuff in#also in the angst path sanemi isnt abusive like kyogo is hes just neglectful & since giyuu was essentially completely cut off from his#normal amount of casual affection and reassurances to Literally Nothing + the looming threat of kyogo's ire + different biology#he has no support aside from Nagisa(who is trying her damn best) and it wears on him mentally ykno?#then the one person he THOUGHT loved him turns out to actually not love *him* so it turns into a fantasy he desperately clings to.#just *someone* to love and support him for being *him* and not some character.#oh almost forgot to tag#sanegiyuu#also to be specific abt the arranged marriage part kyogo forced the tomioka's hand(marry or we decimate you & still get the trade routes<3)#but giyuu volunteered in place of tsutako. he wasnt against the idea of marrying but everyone was fearful of the shinazugawa's culture#and sent Nagisa with him as like. a helper. idk if it has a name. shes a beta well versed in medicine & secondary sex stuff so giyuu's not#COMPLETELY alone to deal with that surrounded by a bunch of people who know nothing about it. theyre formal with eachother as Tomiokas#but to the Shinazugawa they seem really close. mountain pass/southern culture is Very different. more communal and close-knit to#deal with the harsh environment of the mountains/cold
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ddanmeissu · 2 years
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i need someone i can yell at about my very niche tma au ;w;
(see me playing fast and loose between tma lore and mdzs canon under the cut wheeee~)
this is part headcanon, part drabble, all-around mess. just dont think too hard about it please
the classification of each entity isn’t fully documented yet, smirke’s 14 doesn’t exist, but each major clan has a specific fear that called their founders. there are also some entities haven’t been identified yet so a lot of fears bleed into each other 
they’re still cultivators here. they’re cultivating fear.
golden cores are the physical manifestation of your connection with your god within your body. the more you feed it, the more connected you are to your patron, the more powerful you become.
each clan is a powerhouse to a specific entity but their disciples can be touched by multiple entities (and honestly, i cant make everyone a slaughter avatar) only the sect leader needs to be fully devoted to their fear god
Gusu Lan = Beholding, Qinghe Nie = Slaughter, Yunmeng Jiang = Hunt, Lanling Jin = Stranger, and Qishan Wen = Desolation
wei wuxian was once heavily touched by the hunt. his mother a famous Huntress and rogue cultivator and his father a servant and close friend to the sect of The Everchase
jiang cheng’s Hunt core is slightly weaker but its fine because they are of the same pack. they are partners, brothers in everything but blood, and will hunt down anyone who dares to hurt the other.
jiang yanli isn’t an avatar, not marked by the hunt but touched by the Hive, manifesting more on the love/belonging and family aspect rather than the filth aspect
i have more Thots about the family aspects between hive/hunt and how they are both very possessive on who they call their Persons but expresses it different ways that mirror jyl and jc but that’s for a different post
during their time in the cloud recesses they meet a quiet watcher who wwx immediately zones in on him as his new “prey”.
lan wangji is silent and knowledgeable as is expected from a disciple of the beholding, but there is a certain chill around him that other eye avatars do not have
wwx stalks the poor boy, pounces on him whenever he manages to catch him alone, and is just a general disturbance all-around.
he does not feel the Eyes that sometimes watch him when he is alone.
lan xichen does not need the beholding’s power to see the way his brother looks at the young hunter disciple. he is pleased to feel the cold surrounding the jingshi has lessened. shufu seems perplexed and torn.
wwx’s also has his eye on jin zixuan, the pompous plastic peacock that’s engaged to his shijie. he isn’t actually allowed to hunt him down so he settles on dismembering the lifeless mannequins that he uses as servants.
(playing with the timeline here) they get kicked out when a text is destroyed within the Library Pavilion even though it was just a pornography book (any kind of knowledge is still knowledge) and even though it was lwj who destroyed it (the eye had punished him severely for that).
the desolation!wen are attempting to bring The Scourged Earth into the world. they burn down the cloud recesses “in the name of ‘cleaning up the place’ so that it would be ‘reborn from the firelight.’” ( - directly from the mdzs wiki)
the xuanwu of slaughter is an ancient manifestation of, well, the slaughter and cannot be reasoned with.
(”Lan Zhan, can you See anything?” “No. My connection with The Beholding has been greatly severed.” “Oh. well.. Uh, it’s kinda foggy in here huh? Here have my outer robe, you look kinda cold.” “…Mn.”)
lotus pier burns and jiang cheng loses his core. wwx asks flesh!wen qing for help because only an avatar of the flesh (the boneturner, though that isn’t its name yet) is able to carve open another avatar long enough to take something out and place it somewhere else.
jiang cheng immediately becomes a fully-fledged avatar using wwx’s hunt-influenced core. it manifests as strong bloodlust against the wens, fear of being seen as weak prey by the other clans, (and later, hunting down wwx and other end-aligned cultivators.)
wwx gets thrown in the burial mounds. he is dead for three whole months. and then he wakes up.
his hunter core is gone but that’s fine. he is alive not because he wants to but because he has to. when he is awake, he calls upon the dead to exact his revenge. the wens are defeated and everyone is in frightened awe of the new being that he has unwillingly become. when he is asleep, black tendrils of death plague his dreams. He relives the horrible memories of his own and others’ deaths. sometimes he can feel someone watching him but cannot see them in return.
wei wuxian is alive but he is not part of jiang cheng’s pack anymore. he does not follow them out on hunts anymore, doesn’t even bother to stay within the residences. he isn’t part of their pack anymore, abandoned their patron for something else more powerful, and for what? he feels resentment brewing inside him. resentment and fear.
wwx knew not to trust the polished and waxed faces of the jins. all the wen remnants are non-avatars, barely touched by anything other than the fear the jins had instilled by themselves. they do not deserve this cruelty, to be both entertainment and livestock for the rest of the cultivation world. it is true that death comes for everyone, but wwx will not let these people die at the hands of these strangers.
the wens become touched by the End during their stay in the burial mounds. wen ning, with flute music playing in his head, wins an archery game against Death and finally wakes.
 one day a cold mist surrounds yilling when wwx takes a-yuan out on a stroll. He loses him but finds him again clinging to a man in white robes that looks like he wants to disappear. wwx feels himself smile brightly at the sight. (”lan zhan! it’s so nice to see you again! It’s been so cold out today but luckily it’s warmer now!” “Mn.” “You really blend in with the fog with those white robes of yours. it’s okay though because i’m sure i can find you wherever you disappear to!” “Mn.”)
qiongqi path becomes a massacre of plastic mannequins and not!beings. the smell of death and manufactured flesh fill the air like an offering to his unwanted patron, and black tendrils surround wwx and his assailants. It blinds him and he can’t see it, can’t control it, can’t stop it as jin zixuan is pierced through his chest and falls to the ground, dead.
the clans are outraged. they speak in fear of him, they hear of his power over life and death and that he, like the wen fugitives by his side, is trying to bring about his patron into the world. they call for an attack, a bloodbath to take him down once and for all.
and a bloodbath it is. the entire cultivation world against a one-man army. fear rings high in the air and all the Entities are well fed in the aftermath, the most satisfied: Slaughter and (paradoxical to their intent) The End.
later, much later, when the siege is over and nothing is left of his anchor other than a small child marked by death, lwj accepts the punishment lashes and then goes into cold seclusion. the jingshi is completely covered by clouds of fog. no one can See him, the elders only get a debilitating headache when they try to pry too hard. not even lxc, who has become the Eye’s most devoted avatar, can know his brother’s whereabouts. only lan yuan seems to able to navigate through the dense gloom.
the world moves on
jin guangyao’s wide smiles are not conspicuous within the plastic faces and painted lips within lanling jin. If his limbs are too long or if his smile a bit distorted or if he disappears through a bright yellow door and doesnt come back then no one makes mention of it.
No one also notices the webs above them hidden in the high ceilings of lanling jin nor the tiny spiders that skitter around the gossiping servants, spinning and weaving threads of thick silk around them.
it takes years for his brother to come out from the fog and lxc nearly weeps at the knowledge that The Lonely had not forsaken another member of his family. still, lwj has changed. there is a certain chill around him now that persists wherever he goes. though he has always been silent since childhood, his silence now is cold and unfeeling, eyes faraway as if not seeing those around him and only floating through the days. He is not completely alone though and that is enough to alleviate some of xichen’s worries. 
time abates some wounds but certainly not all. there is still an empty cold pit in lwj’s chest but it does not bleed as freely as it did 10 years before. Before, he would have readily disappeared into the fog when the elders comes to look for him, now he chooses to disappear from the cloud recesses and absconds into night hunts. he goes wherever the chaos is, seeking (but not willing to hope) that he might find something that can stir the deadness in his heart.
tbc ?
#rotating this au hard and fast in my mind's eye#i actually dont know the overlap between the mdzs and tma fandoms but im just assuming there isnt much ???#i kinda got too into it at the end there i didnt know where to stop lmao im sorry im pulling all of this outta my ass dskfjhkdhfk#i still have so many Thoughts for this au and cute lil scenes between these avatar fledgelings#i promise its not all Angst its just that lonely!lwj is a very good source of inspo#is this a fix it? maybe. maybe not.#on one hand i want everyone (except jgs and zixun) to love and be happy#on the other hand lonely!lwj is the entire reason why i thought of this au in the first place#according to the wiki the chinese name for cloud recesses means 'somewhere unknown deep in the clouds'#which is Peak Lonely vibes but i didnt find that out until after i wrote this oops#beholding!gusu lan is staying tho bc i love lonelyeyes!lwj hehe#i almost wrote an entire backstory in the tags about madame lan and how wangji inherited her Loneliness dhsdfkhd#i'll write that on a different post this one is long enough#LANLING JIN IS STRANGER ALIGNED BECAUSE THEY'RE ALL CLOWNS#i was thinking of jzx being replaced by a not!them after qiongqi ambush but hmmm maybe thats for another au hmmmm many thoughts#funfact! in MAG113 decker mentions that only a Hunter can kill an avatar of the End so. do what you will with that knowledge :)#OH HEY I JUST REMEMBERED WWX TOLD LWJ TO 'GET LOST' WHEN LWJ TRIED TO SAVE HIM DURING THE FIRST SEIGE JUST BEFORE HE DIED SO :))))#MY LONELY!LWJ HEADCANON IS GOING STRONG#mdzs#mo dao zu shi#should i tag this as tma? nah#anyways here just take this
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