#i certainly wasnt trying my luck sneaking into the kitchen i was fucking petrified
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Yknow I don't think I've had a magnum ice cream since the night before the punishment and having one now.. yeah I cant really blame myself this ice cream is good
#gamer txt.#sure yes i shouldnt have eaten that many they were meant for everyone#that being said being a glutton for ice cream is hardly something i deserved to be starved for#and i mean honestly id do it again magnums are good#it is weird to think that they are technically what started it i know the punishment was for me being a bit of a glutton in general right#(can you blame me the house regularly goes completely unstocked for multiple days sorry being ravenous when i actually get food)#(hell im used to substituting icing and hot chocolate for food multiple days in a row just because no one bothered to get food i could eat)#(and then my mum even took the icing sugar away from me. 1 less thing i could eat. i think the icing sugar is still kept way high up)#but the magnums are what made my mum decide to go full on [no entry to kitchen. at all. you want a drink? ask. you want food? wait.]#[you want the privacy of your own bedroom? too fucking bad. you're not allowed to leave the living room]#for 3 months. it was ice cream man..#and those rules were even worse cause i couldnt leave the living room but everyone else could#if i wanted a drink but no one was in the room with me i just had to wait usually at least an hour or so for someone to come back#i certainly wasnt trying my luck sneaking into the kitchen i was fucking petrified#and g-d if it was my step dad who was the only one with me he'd always pull the 'surely you can get a drink by yourself dont be ridiculous'#and when i never moved he'd do this dramatic sigh and take as long as possible to get me a drink make me feel like a fucking burden#he did ask my mum though cause surely i was allowed to get a drink myself right? most of the dilutant juice in the house was for me#and that fucking glare she gave me like id tried to go in the kitchen and my stepdad was asking cause he caught me#but im gonna be honest as terrified as i was when she reiterate i wasnt allowed in the kitchen at all it did feel kinda good#cause my stepdad was visibly scared too. in my head it was kinda like 'SEE SEE THAT WHAT IT FUCKING FEELS LIKE DONT YOU GET IT'#it is certainly weird though cause no ones apologised for anything. some for better reasons than others#but that first year afterwards that first anniversary my stepdad did bring me food from a local place every other day for like a month#and then last year he did a few times too#i dont think he did it this year#it was like he was apologising for his involvement#but ive never seen any acknowledgement of the punishment or the fact it was a bad thing at all from anyone#its weird cause he must know that it was fucked up why else would he apologise for it. but hes just pretending it never happened too#its put me in a weird spot. cause it all happened during lockdown yknow the only people aware of it are my family.#and theyre not going to talk about it#first time i ever lost weight. real visibly too. fucked up my appetite so bad that after it ended i lost weight again bc i just couldn't eat
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